Someone please help with my family crisis this is a serious question my mom smokes crack?
822169
IT SOUNDS GOOD AND HONEST!\nMOST PEOPLE ON DRUGS DO NT REALIZE WHAT PAIN THEY ARE CAUSING OTHER PEOPLE! I GUESS IN YOUR MOM CASE SHE IS DOING THIS TO HELP WITH HER EMOTIONAL PAIN? IF SHE IS THEN MAYBE YOU NEED TO GET HER FRIENDS AND FAMILY TO ALL TALK TO HER AT ONCE.\nI USE TO DO DRUGS AND LOOKING BACK NOW ALL I REALLY NEEDED INSTEAD WAS SUPPORT AND TO KNOW THAT PEOPLE WHERE THERE FOR ME NO MATTER WHAT!\n\nMAYBE IF YOUR MOTHER SAW HOW MANY PEOPLE CARED AND WORRIED FOR HER HEALTH THEN SHE MIGHT WANT TO STOP!\n\nIF YOU NEED ANY MORE ADVISE OR ANYTHING YOU CAN EMAIL ON:\npetal_9841@yahoo.com\nor\npetal_9841@hotmail.com
619245
I agree with Isle, she would have to want to stop using drugs.  Sometimes people don't realize they are acting the way they do when they are an addict.  My mother used to take vicodin like candy for her back and was the meanest person in the world when taking them.  She didn't realize, so we tape recorded her and played it back for her to listen to, it was a wake up call for her.  If she's not vocally abusive to you, there's not much you can do because if you cut and pasted what she said, she would say you could alter it to make her look bad.  I was on narcotics but I wasn't mean, it just made me sleepy.
1002043
First of all, I'd emphasize the fact that you love her and that you're only discussing this with her because you don't want to lose her.  If you still live with her, be a good model and go for walks, drink diet sodas instead of regular, and perhaps offer to cook dinners.  Is your mom alone often?  She may be lonely or bored, so maybe the two of you could do some activities together like dance class, yoga class, aerobics, or swimming.  You don't have to stick with something that turns out boring, so find your niche.  As for the smoking, perhaps having her talk to her doctor would help.  There's actually a medication called Zyban that helps a lot with the depression and cravings people get when they try to quit but it's prescription only.  Also, if she's alone, cooking for one can be annoying.  Help her find some easy but healthy recipes so that she doesn't feel like she's wasting time.  Good luck!
40740
Honey your mom is going through a lot of stress right now and so are you. I can assure that she loves you and while she might be angry ( hell even PISSED) at you for sneaking out she will respect you being grown up enough to tell her what you did and why. Tell her how you are feeling and what you did. It is a fact of life that you have to accept the punshiment that goes with the "crime" so step up and maybe this conversation will help the two of you understand each other a little better in the long run.
256358
Oh boy,So sorry to hear you are having so many problems with your wife!I have two children also.And I am pretty much trying to keep things together for them too.However,The hubby and I have had drug problems,also!As a matter of fact we are still trying to stay clean!And are on a maintenance drug,prescribed by our doctor to remain clean!We see are addiction specialist every month!And it helps a Great deal!                               Perhaps,you should talk to your wife and tell her she needs to get help with her drug addiction!Drugs are way eXpensive!Trust me!Are you sure that she's not spending ALOT of the money on them?Because once a person is addicted they will do anything to get the drugs they need!I know Alot of people addicted.And I even know people who have passed on due to their drug abuse.If it is just weed she is using that isn't as bad!I am talking about Hard drugs!Like CoCaine and Herione,and crystal meth,Etc.These drugs can make a person LOSE everything!Even their family's!I have seen it happen too many times!And it almost happened to me but 'thank-god'I have changed my ways!                      You really need to try to talk to her about getting help!Like a rehab or detoX,etc!At first she may be in denial.And say that she doesn't have a problem!Everyone says that.Until they hit rock bottom or something really bad happens.With some people that is what it takes to quit.Then again some people don't even quit then.They don't stop till their in jail or unfortunately in the cemetary!I don't know how bad your spouses drug problem is.                       I really need a little more detail.But,if it is bad.She definately needs help.You would also benefit with support groups.Or go to a narcotics anonymous meeting with her.Or perhaps counseling.How is she with your boys?I hope they do not know about her addictions.If you don't want to leave her,or divorce her, and take the boys.Then you should get her some help,and some counseling for the family.           I have been living with addiction for years now.And it's no fun!She may hate you for wanting to get her help.But someday she will thank-you when she is clean.This may be another reason she will not,or should I say can't work.It is almost impossible for a drug addict/alcoholic to keep a job!Trust me I know my hubby is a recovering addict!Who relapses constantly!                                        The disease consumes you.And it's almost impossible to just quit.Without professional help.I also know alot of people who abuse pain/anxiety medication prescribed to them,to the point that they can NOT function!It's dangerous.But they don't care!                                             Anyhow,I honestly think that if you tried to get her help,things might get better.But,if she cheats again I would be done.Please try not be so depressed,try to change this situation.And if you can't after trying to help her so many times.And giving her mutiple chances!Then take your boys and tell her if she don't clean her act up.That's it.You are taking custody of them.Because you and the boys would be better off.                                   Being a 'bored' housewife,is hardly a reason to cheat!She should be glad your supporting her and your boys!And that you give her money!To by drugs,shop,spend,and buy more drugs!And that you love her,and your boys enough to put up with all of this!Please,don't feel like this is your fault.I have seen to may people go through this,and I have been there myself.                                        It is the addiction,the disease.She may not ever be herself again until she admits to having a problem.Some people in denial never fully recover.And depression is to be eXpected when the both of you are dealing with all of this.Depression sucks!I have it too.I really suggest some counseling.the medication may make you feel a little bit better.Till you get this all str
98146
Wow... i smoke but i go outside and change clothing when i come back in so my kids wont be around it. Your mom sounds like one tuff lady. have you voiced your concern to her about YOUR HEALTH? if not you should. If she still doesnt want to stop you could always move out or make her move out if it bothers you that much. Geez i cant beleave how stubborn your mom is. I dont see the big deal on going outside to smoke. I feel for you. \n\nGood Luck. one more thought maybe you could show her one of those videos about what happens to your body when you smoke and you could start crying while watching it with her and tell her you dont want her to end up with cancer and die.
781234
your mom is offering to help you!! she wants the best for you and is willing to do what it takes for you get treatment and life on back on track..she seems like a responsible caring woman so i would say stick with your mother even if it means getting kicked out of your house! its only because she loves you and until you figure out the consequences of your actions..then i presume she will keep doing it
542020
Similar story myself with smoking and not listening to parent, so I think you are doing the right thing not going crazy, as it didnt work for me. I think maybe she may be smoking as she thinks it is cool and out of subtle peer pressure to fit in with friends.  Perhaps you could try bribery.  It is best to deal with it now so that she does not get addicted.  What is her weak spot, is she very concerned about her appearance? Cos you could talk about her ageing faster is she smokes.  I dont know as kids dont see themselves as ever getting old and they think they are immortal.  I would explain that young people can get lung cancer too and they can also get cancer of the tongue and mouth which is becoming more common, and this would be awful, and not glamarous at all.  I do think bribery may be the best option, I do sympathise, every parent wants to protect their children, if only they could learn from our mistakes. good luck.                 Also the other comment gave me an idea you could get her to exhale smoke out through a tissue, it will come out yellow and will give her an idea of how black her lungs will turn if she keeps smoking\n\nCould I add  that I dont think you should be buying her cigarettes (if you are), that is sanctioning it and you cant appear to be that in favour of it.      Maybe she doesn't even like smoking and it is all show.  My guess is like most kids she may not be inhaling smoke properly anyway - (lots of kids do grow out of this phase)                                        \n\nIf you want to stop smoking yourself I found Paul Mckennas hypnotheraphy dvd combined with 4 mg nicotine gum made it suprisingly easy to give up (you still need a bit of will power, but the dvd helps you forget as long as you listen to it for 1st week or 2 once a day.  I failed 1st time as I did not listen to it enough but 2nd time it worked brilliantly and that is after 14 years smoking.
162491
Don't smoke, but my mom can't stop
142536
Call and ask to speak to her Doc. Tell him how you feel, tell him how you mother is acting, tell him she is doubling up on meds, having accidents,ect.  If that does not work try to talk to the school counciler, if your mom is addicted to pain meds she needs help and is NOT able to help herself.  She could have an accident that could kill or injure herself and innocent people.  Good luck.\n\nBlubla
547726
GO see your sister see if she agrees that her drug problem,or the people it attracts,endangers her kids(she may).She may also agree that you should take her kids for their protection.\nDon't wreck your relationship with your sister it may come in handy in protecting her kids.\nAs for your sister being on drugs not much you can do but point out that you think she is destroying her life,what she does or responds is up to her.
353687
How about *shock horror* being honest with your mom. i think you will find that a) she will be happier to know the truth about your friend. B) it will encorage her to trust you and c) your mom is gonna worry about you whether your friend smokes or not, give your mom the oppertunity to make up her own descions about your friend. Explain how you feel about smoking and maybe even try to encorage your friend to stop.
392281
Wow, I can only imagine how stressful this must be for you!\n\nI think that the psychiatrist will be able to give you some answers.  If there WAS sexual abuse the Dr. will be able to tell--even is she lies about it.  Psychiatrists are trained to deal w/ these situations.\n\nPlease don't feel that this is your fault.  And please don't let the stress overwhelm you.  \n\nBest wishes.\n\nEDITED TO ADD:  In light of your additional details, I'd definately encourage you to just go ahead and take her to the hospital.  DO NOT feel guilty.  And don't listen to her when she tells you she hates you or that you're a bad mother.  YOU'RE NOT. \n\nOK, straight up talk here:  It takes a **** of a lot of courage to be parent sometimes and this is one of those times.  You need to get help both for her and for yourself.  It will be hard and things will get really rough for a while but you deserve a normal life and she deserves to have the most normal life she can have too.  The longer you wait, the harder it'll be.\n\nTake care.
318070
It sounds like there is a lot of sibling rivalry going on.  Your mom may have too much for her to handle- not your fault, and probably not completely hers. The drug addict alcoholic brother NEEDS more attention, so she gives it to him- that dont measn she loves you less (although it has happened before like that- I cant say from your question alone) SHE probably looks at you like the responsible one, and that you need less attention.\n\nIf you talk to her and express your concerns, maybe you will realize that she loves you very much and is very proud of you.  Maybe she feels like you were the one who grew up right out of them all. Maybe she dont knopw that you feel the way you do- and if she did, maybe she would change.  It sounds like you are hurt by all this, and you have a right to be- but do your best to reach your mom by communicating. Try your best to develop the relationship you want with your mom, eventually she will come around- and if she dont- no one can say you didnt try.
560161
I am truly sorry for you and your sister, but sometimes the only thing that can be done is to wait for her to hit rock bottom, and ask or accept your help.  It may come soon or never, all you can do is be there for her, try to keep her fed, but do not give her money for drugs or a place to stay until you know she is clean.  I am also sorry to say but when you see her you need to make sure she is not holding any drugs, because if you get busted your life will become really crappy, real fast.  Good Luck, I know we never met, but I have strong shoulders so if you need to talk e-mail me, just click on the avatar and my e-mail is there.
1106866
Wow ~ you have a lot going on.  First, why do you think that the court would drug test you?  If it is a hearing on about your dad failing to pay, isn't your mother trying to help find support for you? Second, if your mom hasn't been receiving money from your dad~where are you getting money to use drugs?  Shouldn't you be more considerate of your mother who is trying to provide for you?  Third, aren't you being quite selfish~doing drugs and worrying about yourself?  How old are you?   Why can't you see what your mother is trying to do to help you and your doing drugs?  That is so outrageous and selfish that I cannot even being to tell you how disappointing that whole situation is due to your lack of respect for your own mother.  You should definitely worry about someone other than yourself.\n\nOh, they can drug test you if they have cause such as you using the child support money to use drugs.  Not to mention, you could be placed in a juvenile faculty if they think that your mother is not taking care of ~ since you are selfishly ruining your own life by using drugs ~\n\nI am sorry I am so harsh with you~I am sure that you love your parents very much.  It makes me very upset to see a child throwing away so much to use something that can destroy their entire life and the lives of the people who love them back~hugs and kisses.
461355
awww, she needs someone to talk to, if her family is not an option, she should call her local crisis hotline and ask for a referral to a mental health professional, she can also talk to a counselor at school but she may be concerned about the confidentiality, she can talk to her medical doctor, she can also talk to someone at her church or if she hasn't one, any local church will do. Cutting oneself maybe a symptom of a serious problem that requires professional help...as far as hating her family but being ready to do anything for her friends well that is called being a teenager *smile* She should also know that drugs are even more dangerous for those who are suffering from depression.