What does one do if one is miserable about death and tried but can't adopt the afterlife belief?
817402
Well, you're stuck.  Personally, I think it's less wise to look for a belief that "suits" you than to search for what the truth is.\n\nStick to the bible....better to come around to what is so, then seek out what isn't so, just because it sounds better to you.  And I mean no offense by this.
196372
Imagine how scary it must be to not believe in God, or in an afterlife.  Imagine how scary it is...if you are wrong.  I would imagine that many people that claim not to believe in God must have a nagging doubt, some underlying suspicion that they may not even be aware of.  If you live your life in whatever way you choose, claiming not to believe in an afterlife, in heaven or in hell, then what happens if you are wrong?  I would think that must be terrifying...and what do many people do when they are afraid of something..they attack.  They attempt to fight, to disprove, to make themselves feel better, to feel safer, in any way that they can.  That is just my opinion.
24207
I believe that I will have no afterlife.\n\nOr rather, I believe this: I cannot imagine a god so cruel as to condemn me to an eternally unchanging afterlife. Sure, I can imagine enlightenment that could last a long, long time--it would be interesting to explore the universe and unlock its mysteries, or to reincarnate over and over as different beings, up to a point--but I cannot imagine any existence for eternity without it becoming horrible.\n\nAnd thus, since I cannot believe in a god so cruel, I believe that either there will be no afterlife at all, or there will be no afterlife for the being that I consider to be "me." In other words, if what I become after my death can somehow find fulfillment in an eternal afterlife, then it won't be "me" and therefore not worth worrying about.\n\nI'm young--around 40--but don't see any reason to want an afterlife. I certainly want to not-die in this life, though. I find this life just fine, and would like to experience a lot more of it. I just don't want eternity.
464694
We all die. There's no way around it. Its like a story that you want to write and you have how it begins and you know that its going to end in a final way somehow. Now what do you do put into the middle? You know the old saying,'Do the most with what you have available to you.' Life is temporary, everything is temporary. Life is an oppurtunity to improve yourself. If you dont believe in reincarnation or an afterlife, 'an oppurtunity to improve yourself' might not make any difference. We have theories about what state people are in before and after life, but none of these are absolutely proven. We have a better idea about the nature of life, so that can be something to focus on. I have this theory that 'there is no limit to how bad things can get'. This helps me because I know that the negative has unlimited options and I know that I could spend my whole life floating in uncertainty and vagueness, having no focus, should I direct my attentions to negativity.  Positives are more limited and easier to focus on. Thats just my take on it, it may just be mumbo jumbo to you. There is another way. You know that you can find enjoyment and pleasure in life. Seek them, but try not to cause others to suffer as you do so. Life might just be for fun and your body an amusement park. If life has no point, it is still a matter of character to treat others with dignity and grace. The Golden Rule and all that. \nhttp://subgenius.com\nhttp://slackoff.blogspot.com
388611
I'm an athiest as well.  Religion just didnt do it for me as i got older.  I guess i leaned more toward science.  I have no problem with there not being an afterlife.  Seriously, why have 2 lifes?  One here and one in heaven?  Just doesnt make sence.  And why does there need to be a god?  I think people just need a crutch to lean on in times of need.  But let me ask this, when you try and do something good, is it for your fellow man, or to make god happy?
868372
Im an agnostic, I dont think you can prove an afterlife till you are there.  So yes, I live as if this is it and I think that is a much better way to live.  Life is precious.  It does make me sad that one day I will have to leave my children and one day they will also cease to exist, but that just makes my time with them more special.  \nIf everyone believed this though, you would be unlikely to get suicide bombers, as the selfish idiots do it thinking they will be rewarded, or people who waste their time sitting in church or various other pastimes designed to prep for the end of their life.  I feel sad when I see people waste so much time praying, but some people need to feel they have something to go onto, and if that helps them meet their end without fear, i suppose thats good.
18057
The existance of an afterlife is something I am so not qualified to answer, since I have only known this one.  I'd hate to burst peoples' bubbles, but i doubt there is a heaven or hell.  So call me a heathen, whatever, I surely believe in some divine creator... But the reason humans invented such ornate tales is to firstly keep people in line.  People do good and hope for reward.  Secondly, they believe so that the loss of a loved one can be comforted.  I feel that people should find their comforts in other ways.  Death is not a tragety really.  People want something to look forward to.  Thirdly, some might say arrogance; that humans are somehow above all other lifeforms and part of them lives for all eternity.  The forth reason people believe in an afterlife is fear.  Death is one of the most feared things, along with pain and failure.  Why is it feared?  Because no one truly knows what happens.  That's why people might cling to religious descriptions, which are also rather vague and hold few actual details.  So, believe whatever you wish my friend, but there's my two cents.
472821
Who's to say what happens when we die?  I mean, I haven't seen anyone come back from the dead and say, hey, this is what it's like.  I'd just say to live your life according to your personal morals and values.  Believe in yourself and your values.  And let those holier than mere mortals judge you.  No person, and certainly no one online, is so omnipresent to have a right to judge you.  Good luck!
251897
I am a believer in reincarnation.  I do not believe that religion is as cut and dry as many people like to think.  I believe that we have had past lives and that for some there will be another life that will follow this one.  We are put here to learn lessons and to become enlightened souls, when we reach enlightenment is when we attain heaven.  There is no such things as hell, hell is being on earth and you can choose to continue to live here by not enlightening yourself or you can choose to learn and eventually reach heaven.
1084594
this is how i see it.  and some may disagree.  actually, most disagree.  but that is their decision.\n\nchoosing a religion is nearly impossible.  if you are going to choose one, base your decision on what you personally believe to be true.  if you cannot decide, do not choose a religion.  i have opted out of choosing a religion and decided instead to focus on spirituality; that is, a connection with god that has no direct relation to any particular church, sect, or teachings.  you do not need a church and a preacher to commune with god, for we are all creations of god and therefore are all granted the same privelages.\n\ndeath is the natural and inevitable conclusion to life.  there is no evidence to prove or disprove that death itself is final; the possibility of reincarnation or the existence of an afterlife always exists.  death should not be feared, nor should it be welcomed with open arms.  it is best to not think about death until you are directly confronted with it.  and even then, you must take it with a grain of salt so to speak.\n\npeople hate each other because, well, to put it quite bluntly, people are selfish, greedy, despicable beings.  not always, and not everyone, but most of us are, at least sometimes.  and that's okay.  the people that you love and who love you in return will show this love by putting aside their own selfish motives to allow time and caring for you, and you should be expected to allow the same courtesy to them.  racism, descrimination, etc., these are the products of ignorance and insecurity.  those who judge and stereotype do so because they do not love themselves.  and people who do not love themselves often have much difficulty in convincing others to love them.  there is nothing more frustrating than caring for someone who does not care for themselves.  these bigots are to be pitied, for they will never know true happiness, and they will never understand the divine nature of the universe.  \n\nfocus on the beautiful.  happiness is an end, not a means.  do not pursue happiness; pursue love, pursue beauty, pursue passion, vigor, inspiration, imagination; pursue those aspects of life that you admire, respect, and adore, and the elusive happiness will find you.  life is to be taken seriously, but it is also to be taken lightly; and always, always with a grain of salt.
979635
I think you can make your own form of heaven here on Earth.  There's no way to know if it exists in the afterlife until you get there, so the best route is to make the most of what you have here.  \n\nI don't believe in hell, simply because the concept of a place for eternal torture escapes me. I don't know that there are a lot of people I would wish eternal torture on- I mean, years of it for those who support genocide, etc., maybe, but eternity?  It bothers me.  Doesn't mean I'm right, doesn't mean I'm wrong either.
180038
nah.\n\n may be there is no afterlife but death is a reality. people are afraid of death even if they believe in it. as many others said to people are more afraid about how they are going to die. when you are dead you are just dead. no pain. no suffering. nothing. body is destroyed ultimately. back to "panch tatva" (5 elements- earth, water,fire,air, eather/zero/sky fifh element is diificult to translate in english). \n\n  there is a story of dialogues between a Yaksha and Yuddhishthir. "what is the biggest surprise in this world" asked yaksha. "people die everyday; each mortal has to die one day or another; even then in general people are afraid to accept it as a reality which will befall on them too eventually" yuddhishthir said.\n\ni am not in denial. i concentrate on my karma and try to have a ballanced life and attitude and be good. it is for my own satisfaction. \n\nKrishna said  "Karmanyevaadhikaraste" we can only do deeds the result is not in our hands. so if there is heaven or next birth or there is just nothing it does not matter. if there is them i hope my karma was good enough.
459749
You asked how to be happy and wholesome. Cool. You asked the question of non-Christian folk. OK. Lets remember what you didn't ask ... How to attain enlightenment, or get to heaven, or please any Deity. Fair enough. So we'll just stick to those first two things ... How to be happy ... Learn to be content with things as they are. That means to practice simple acceptance of other people, places, things, circumstances, etc. When you can accept things as they are you can live without trying to change those things or control those people or etc. You get the idea. While you're accepting others as they are in order to be happy don't forget to extend that same acceptance to your self. Its just a matter of letting everything be what it is, and knowing that its that way for a reason, and ... that's OK. So far ... HAPPINESS = ACCEPTANCE. Now, wholesome. A dictionary definition of "wholesome" is: #1; Promoting good health or wellbeing, healthful. #2; Improving the mind or morals. #3; Looking healty or vigorous. ... Whoa! You're not asking for much, are you? lol Its not that complicated, really. Give life a little thought. Keep your self and your space clean. Get some exercise. Try to eat a ballanced diet. Take a multiple vitamin daily. The health aspect isn't all that hard. That part about improving the mind and morals? A little more work. Improve the mind? Exercise it a little. Read. Watch a little History Channel. I think you know how to exercise your mind already. Just do it consistently. Your morals? That's simple. Simple ought never be confused with easy. Pick a moral code, and ... LIVE IT! Which one? Hey, not my call. Suggestions? Sure. Center your life on (and you don't have to be any of these things to use something they have that YOU find useful) ... The Wiccan Reede. The Jewish 10 Commandments. The "Golden Rule" of Jesus. Whatever. Picking is the easy part. That's simple. Now, living it, that's another story. Be consistant, but be loving with yourself when you make a mistake too. Just DON'T GIVE IT UP! BE CONSISTANT! And last, but not least, get out of self. You do that by helping others and being there for them. It also gives you the exercise you need in acceptance AND your morals. Neither of those work well in a void. ~ Peace & Blessings ~ ;-)
749737
Sorry, I too am an atheist.  I can't help you with your faith but I am sorry that you and your friend are going through this.  There is so much pain in the world.  In Africa a child dies due to diseases from unclean drinking water every two minutes.\n\nWhat I try to do, to ease the pain, is to volunteer.  To ease the pain of another and help where I can.  Because sometimes there is nothing I can do to ease the pain of one I love.\n\nI can't help restore your faith in god.  {hugs}
895993
No strings attached. If you don't believe in God you have no reason to have morals or a conscience. Life becomes a game... until you die and realize it's too late and then you get to enjoy hell with no regrets.
569873
They say you can't, but if this is what you believe in, that you are walking in the wrong path and are now choosing another, which is your right to freedom to choose any way.\n\nI would urge you to go on. Many people especially Christians have died for their faith. We know that for every martyred, there is great rejoicing in heaven not that they died or where killed, but because they died for their faith.
1101591
Spend the day in contemplation. Remembering all the enjoyable times in my life. Trying to forgive all the people who have done me down, and hoping that people I may have hurt will do the same for me, albiet postumusly. Contemplating the possibility of life after death. Make love with a beautiful woman, ( mentaly or physicaly beautiful that is). Drink a fantasticbottle of champagne  and some 100 yr old Jack Daniels.Listen to all my favourite music such as Pink Floyd. Hopefully aproach midnight at peace with myself and the world and finally drift off peacefully. \nHey what a beautiful dream, wouldn'tit be nice to spend every day like that?\nContact me if you feel thats a good way to go, maybe we can go togeather.!!!!!!!!