husband very possesive and beats wife. want legal advice.?
814706
The very first thing she should do is get in contact with her local domestic violence shelter.  They have all the resources and legal advice she is going to need.  It will also provide her with the professional support she is going to need to repair the damage this horrible man has caused her.  Thirty years of continual beating would make this woman feel less than human.  This woman has the right to live in peace, not to be beaten every day of her life.  I would ignore whatever "legal" letters come her way because it is very much against the law for this man to be beating her, so as far as I am concerned, she, more than him, has the law on her side by staying away from this man.  It is very costly to go through the judicial system, that is why I impolore her to seek out help from a domestic violence refuge/shelter...they usually have lawyers associated with the organisation that dont cost anything to the victim.\n\nHe will use every trick in the book to keep his control over her.  She has to remain strong and dont feel guilty about what she is doing.  She is doing the right thing, she needs to get as far away from this man as possible.  He is nothing less than a dirty dog as far as I am concerned and how he can call himself a man is totally beyond me.  He is nothing more than a bully who is only strong when he is beating defenseless women.....a real man doesnt do that.  I really feel for this woman, for not only has she been enduring his physical beatings, the emotional damage he would have done to her would be absolutely mind blowing.  That is why she needs help from people who are experienced and qualified in dealing with issues like your friend is going through.\n\nHaving lost her baby is only another trick he is using to make her feel guilty.  Whatever happened with the baby is irrelevant and is his tool for making her believe she deserves to be beaten and made to feel like a total piece of sheet.  She needs professional support from people who know what they are doing....they will lead her in the right direction.  A Lawer only knows the law...they are not aware, nor do they care of the psychological dammage this woman has suffered, and unless her mental health as well as her physical health is attended to, then there is every chance she will go back to him.  She needs a lot of healing for her to gain the strength to know that his is the one committing the crimes and she is the victim.   She probably believes she deserves to be treated like this...most victims of domestic violence do believe it and it is only when they get out and get the professional help they need do they realise they dont deserve any of it.  It is only then will her life start to take a turn for the better.  Whilever she is allowing him to blame her, then she will always feel guilty...always feel to blame for the reasons he beats her.  She is not to blame for any of this.  Her husband is a sick individual, even animals dont treat others that way, if they kill, they do it quickly and humanely and they dont torture their victims for the hell of it.  This man only gets his power from beating women.  If its not her, it would be someone else...this man (and I use the term loosely) has a huge problem and has made her think that it is her problem.  It is not,  she cant help him.  The only person she can help is herself.  He will never be brought to justice whilever she condones his behaviour.\n\nPlease, if your friend wont do it, you do it.  Ring your local domestic violence organisation now...she needs the help now.\n\nI wish you the very best.
565826
Options:\n\nCall local law enforcement.\nCall a lawyer.\nCall a womens shelter/womens rights advocate.\nCall a domectic violence hotline.\n\nDon't know how bad it is but if they are living together she should probably arrange a place to stay before doing this.  If the guy gets wind of it she may be in harms way again.\n\nA Domestic Violence Protection Order will also help her get things in order and him ordered to stay away or go to jail.
228280
Yes this is domestic abuse. It usually get worst no better if he do not get help. Try to get out as soon as you can but if you can not....\n\n1.take pictures of injuries- this can be use later if you need to go to court.\n2.Let someone know what is going on- incause something happen to you.\n3.Try save up some money, and extra fifty from the bill money (tape it under a draw.\n4.call the police, if it a shared space the police will take him to jail and you can get a restraining order.\n\nGood luck
980024
My husband has done that to me and it is not pleasant. If you do that be prepared to get smacked.
969033
He has got to take it like a man and just let her beat on him for a while. If not, then its off to jail he goes. Here is a tip for the next time, DON'T TOUCH HER!!
718214
He needs to be placed in a bag and beaten. I don't know unless counseling would help. He obviously doesn't see all that she does to keep home and business floating. Maybe if he has his own job besides this business they bought it is to much for him maybe he isn't doing well in his job and it makes him feel worse cause she is doing such a great job. I'm afraid the verbal abuse will become physical if he is pushed to much.
718919
Do not feel ignorant. Abuse comes in many forms, and unless your husband gets help FAST, things will escalate. He has control issues, and feels very insecure about everything. Most abusers are insecure, and feel that violence is the only way to keep the things they love from leaving. But in actuality all it does is FORCE the things they love further away from them. I strongly suggest getting help, and if he refuses...you need to leave before things get worse. Without help, eventually your relationship with him will crumble to the point of nonexistance. There is no excuse for being violent with someone, and stress happens to everyone. Not everyone gets ready to beat the crap out of their wife/ mate however when the situation gets hairy. Once again, get him some help before its too late, or leave and work on you. Huge hugs, and best of luck.
306810
sorry to hear about your case. You are like holding every breath you take and not letting any of the air out. Like you said, you man does everything right in the house and is a good father, just a bad husband. You want to sentence him to death on one hand, but on the other side he does not deserve the sentence of death.\nSo what should you do?\nAs a guy, i hate your husband because he has two face. For what you can do is use the website below. What it does is letting you know everything that your husband is doing on the computer. If he really cheats again, you have everything on paper. In black and write. Now, the question is about your kid. If your kid is a boy, he has a bad father to learn from. \nIf it really comes to divorce, so be it. You should not be sleeping with a guy that cheats on you every night for the rest of your life. \nPlus your son can learn from his father mistake and learn how to treat other women respectfully in the future.\n\nBut...but... if you want to give you husband one more chance, it is okay to. Once you know what he is senting on the computer. Tell him that you are take your son and yourself away. And You will be seeing him in court/lawyer office about divorce. But you don't want him to know about you knowing what he has been doing in the computer. That is you best card in hand for court in the future if you do decide to leave him.\nIf he comes back to you, he has to prove it. Give him a month time. See how much he loves you. See how many time he calls. See how much he is willing to do for you to get you back. \nRemember you are worry about your son, but you need to care about yourself too. \nMy friend live with her mother after her parent separated. She know what kind of dad she has and hated him. Her mom is doing find.\nI am not scarying you, i just want you to know you child will understand. You need to know if you husband is still the right man for you. If not...then he has to go.\nIf he is, then he stays.\nGood luck
1183684
What you've suggested is really all you can do. You gave her good advice about communicating with her husband and going to counseling. Beyond that, it's really none of your business and not your responsibility.
1074147
Start out by reporting her for disturbing the peace. Do it every time she starts screaming at you. If they won't come out and do anything about it, this is what you do. Go to the Police Dept during regular business hours and file a complaint regarding lack of response on your problem. Tell them that you feel threatened by this woman. Keep a journal of every time you call and everything she does. Write down dates and times for everything. After you have several calls down and several incidents recorded, go to your city or county courthouse and ask the clerk of court about filing for a protection order. A protection order says that she can no longer attempt to communicate with you in any way. She can still yell at your husband or guests, but not you. Once you are at that level, go to your apartment managers again with copies of all this information. Still can't get rid of her? Take your info to an attorney for civil matters. You may have a nice case for a lawsuit. You may also want to have your husband file for a protection order as well. Hopefully you get a good repsonse from the police and she starts getting tickets for disturbing the peace. Do you know her name? You can check with the county courthouse and get her criminal record if she has one. Check with them and see what they will charge you for the information. In my area it's ten dollars for anybody's info. Build up and save your evidence and you should see her going bye bye, before long. If I can be of any further assistance, let me know.
645445
Unfortunately the beaten wife syndrome has got a hold on her.  Its very sad to see these women who do this on a regular basis.  But they are the only ones who can change this.  Sure, you could have your buddies whoop on him, but then you are lowering to his level.  Until she realizes that she needs to make a change, this will continue.  Some women never get it and end up dead.  Maybe suggest that she go and see a counselor about it.  Then once they are no longer together, Have 6 of your Buddies kick the shyt out of him.
1163488
Sounds like he deserves the punishment and this would alert other unsuspecting women, but would his anger and cruelty excalate towards you?  Also, search your heart before you have him arrested, if you are not going to follow through on the charges, it is not a good idea to have him arrested and maybe a restraining order would do the trick.  Although some women at the resource centers may have a biased view, they have understanding and experience.  You have been through enough and do not deserve a harder time, but must explore the ramifications of each option.  Try going to the police station or call a womens' resource center to talk to someone experienced about the whole process before making a decision.  However, don't put off your decision too long as this could be the worst thing for you.
1164933
Get a lawyer - some will take your case & get payment from your husband plus attend some type pyschological counseling.  You  are being screwed here.   You are entitled to  spousal support; plus visitation.  File an OSC & ask attorney to go ex-parte to get  you temporary financial support until the hearing.\nYou can also fill out paperwork online if CA,,, use this website \nhttp://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/selfhelp/  \nChild needs counseling & when you go to court demand child get it.  No child has the right to pysically abuse their parent & you as her parent should not be penalized by losing your home or the other daughter.\nSeems husband is not doing right by you...  you need to get angry & start standing up for yourself &  your rights
388433
I don't think it would be wrong to exaggerate on this one in order to keep him away.  Have her file a restraining order on him. Just say he hit her or that he threaten to kill her with a gun or knife. My ex-husband was so controlling that after I left him he followed me around.  Even after I changed my phone # he found out what it was some how.  He really did try to stab me, but when I filled my restraining order I added a little extra just to make him pay. Who do you think the judge will believe? Him or her.  All she has to say is she's extremely terrified of him and what he will do to her. The restraining order will cost you about 20 or 30 dollars, but it's a small price to pay to keep a psycho away LEGALLY.
760078
Ex-husband or boyfriend? If he has no legal claim over the house call the cops. If he does then leaving with your kids sounds like the only reasonable option.
994567
My husband and I have been married for a year and have been together for 5 years.  The first year was fine...2 months after we started dating I moved to Texas with my parents...9 months later I moved back to where he was and we moved in together I'd say about 6 months later is when it started.  He would get really angry because I was complaining too much about his job or that he wouldn't do the dishes when I asked and he would throw chairs...at the time we had those little plastic picnic chairs...and clothes at me or near me.  He would yell and scream at me and get right up in my face.  I don't remember him ever laying a hand on me during that time though.  About a year or two later we ended up breaking up mostly because we needed to be our own people for a while considering I was 17 when we moved in together and he was 20.  We were apart for about 2 months then we got back together and I moved in with him and his roommate at the time.  About a month or so later we got our own place and soon after that is when the major abuse started.  I never chalked it up as abuse though until I was watching some show and realized that my boyfriend was abusing me.  When he would get really mad at me he would grab my neck and pin me to the wall or throw me to the couch or the bed or where ever we were.  He has only slapped me twice and I've gotten a few bruises on my neck.  After I realized it was abuse I started to fight back and when he would grab my neck I would kick at him and push him away...I only did that a couple times because it made him even more angry.  We did end up getting married about 6 months after we got back together.  A lot of the abuse happened soon after we got married.  I only remember actually losing my breath and struggling to breath once...and that was a couple of months ago when we were in a car and arguing about he wanted to change his oil in front of an auto parts store but there was a guy outside that when my husband was in the store kept walking past the car looking at me in a weird way so when my husband came back to the car I told him I wanted to leave and told him the reason and so he got all upset and acted like a total baby and so on the way home I told him that him being my husband should want to protect me and want me to feel safe and whatever and I guess I said something wrong and he reached over and grabbed my neck and didn't let go right away like he normally did.  We got home soon after that and I went in and started to pack my things to leave and he came in and threw me on the bed and told me I wasn't leaving so I decided to leave my things and just leave and he just kept stopping me grabbing my wrists and he pushed me and I fell over a foot rest and hit my head.  I don't remember why I didn't leave.  but since then we have gone to a counselor I think two times...but now he works so much that we argue on the phone.  He never did this when he was drinking...we don't drink very much.  I don't know how he could do this to me either...he always said it was because I knew what made him mad but I still did it.  I have changed because of this...I don't say as much anymore and I pick and choose my words...I can't say I am afraid of him though.  I still say what I want when I'm really angry.  I know hes more afraid of my step dad than I am afraid of him though.  It use to happen at least once a week to twice a month.  We don't have kids...we have animals...whenever he kicks the dog I kick him...so see I'm not that afraid of him...I am for a couple weeks after the events happen though but normally I'm not.  He is intimidating though because hes a foot and a half taller than me.
372263
First write down all the facts (not feelings) as they pertain to the situation.\n\nThen meet with a local attorney.\n\nDon't make verbal or written threats.\n\nGood luck.