how do i ask my 12 yr old daughter if my sister in laws boyfriend did unmentionables to her?
831542
I'm so sorry this is happening to your family. I am a rape crisis counselor and I will tell you what I tell my clients.\n\nTake your daughter to a quiet and private place. Try saying something like this:\n\n"I want you to know that no matter what you tell me I will believe you. I love you and I will support you through this. Before I ask you this I want you to know that no one would ever blame you for anything and if you don't want to talk about this now, we can always talk about it when you are ready. I want to know if (name) has ever touched you in an inappropriate way or done anything that makes you uncomfortable."\n\nIf she doesn't want to talk about it or if you don't believe her if she tells you it's untrue, don't push the issue. Just tell her that she can tell you as much or as little as she wants and that if she wants to talk to someone else about it (family member, counselor) that you support that.\n\nThe best thing you can do for her is not push her and continue to remind her that nothing is her fault and that you will believe anything she tells you. She needs to know that she can trust you with this information. Which may mean letting her decide when/if she tells others. \n\nEven if she doesn't tell you right away, you have opened the door to this conversation. The worst thing any parent can do is ignore the situation.\n\nMy thoughts are with you.
500710
You should ask her how she feels about things thats the only way to find out... If I understood the question correctly.
1068760
Ask her about it before you ruin a family with BS allegations.
836277
Tell her. Explain to her that you did not know that they were together and that you wanted her to know before she walked down the aisle with this jerk. \n\nImagine how she is going to feel if you don't tell her and a couple years down the road they have kids together and he is still cheating on her with other girls.
261466
what you actually wanted to ask?? if you talking about your daughter then you can make her like you but do not force her to be like you give her love……………
749783
dude ask her her if shes olryt b4 its 2 l8\nshe might hav got another bf or somthin
863577
Now how would WE know who is using?\n\nWhy don't you ask him.  You have a right since your daughter spends time over there.  If he refuses to tell you, then get a court date and get his visitation suspended.
1061838
ask her if she wants him
848222
This is an easy one.  Why not imagine that you had a daughter your age and that it was she not you, that was involved with your bf.  What advice would you tell her?  Simple isn't it?\n\nYou know what to do.  Love is not a competition.
1046177
DOES YOUR SISTER REALLY HAVE A GOOD REASON TO KEEP HER CHILD FROM YOU? MY SISTERS HUSBAND WHO IS ONLY FATHER OF 2 OF HER KIDS IS TRYING TO TELL ME MY NEICE AND NEPHEW WHO ARENT EVEN HIS CANT COME TO MY HOUSE ANYMORE BECAUSE SHE SPOKE HER MIND TO HIM AND SHE HAPPENED TO BE AT MY HOUSE AT THE TIME.BUT I STUCK TO MY GUNS THATS MY NEICE AND MY NEPHEW WHETHER OR NOT YOU LIKE IT THEY WILL NEVER LOVE YOU LIKE THEY LOVE ME. MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY TO TALK TO YOUR SISTER AND SEE WHY SHE SHOULD HAVE A GOOD EXPLAINATION FOR HER ACTIONS AND IF SHE DONT THEN I WOULD LOOK AT IT LIKE YOU TRIED THATS THE ONLY THING YOU CAN DO IN THE LONG RUN SHE WILL KNOW SHE WAS WRONG.JUST WISH THE BEST FOR YOUR NEICE,SHE WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO REPLACE YOU!
994698
The best scenario is to talk to his ex in person one-on-one.  If she is a slut she will lie, if she wants a relationship then she won't.\n\nFamilies will not take your side, they will do what is in their children's best interest.  So don't take anything they say as the truth.\n\nI hate to say this, but you gotta play the game. If you really love him, you have to do everything you can to save the relationship.
989560
Well, someones getting bitchy & jealous, so ask her!\nst
748209
Remember this is your battle with the inlaws not your sister in law's.  Do not make her choose sides.  Be happy for her that she has a better relationship with them than you do because I'm sure you wouldn't wish what you are going through on another.  Maturity is called for here.  Stick to your guns for yourself, don't expect other's to choose sides.  She sounds like she's attempting to be neutral.  If you don't like hearing about what's going on with them, simply ask her not to go into detail about them or what they do or don't do.  Keep your friendship.  That's more important than allowing the in laws to drive a wedge between you two...and likely, that's what's happening.
237198
ask her about it and ask her what she wants out the relationship
1121230
well do this, i tried it and it helped. first because you have been so patient now its the pay back time for her, start asking her very personal questions e.g.. about her life, love life, how she loves to have s.e.x, how many men she has slept with and dated, how many kids she has, are they all from one father? has she ever cheated on her husband or boyfriend, is she poor?\nI mean just ask her all sorts of things and see how she responds, she will after some times realize that she has been very nosy and will eventually stop.
144300
try asking her friends. they tell each other everything
505814
Because they are way too nosy (the inlaws and insecure) this seems like you are hurt by this sit down and talk to her about it so it doesn't cause any gaps in your relationship good luck