I m married once,but due to some reasons,it cudn.t go well.trusted sm1 else,but hurt agn?all broken nw.wt 2 do
820230
Hi Dabby,\n\nLife is full of ups and downs.  Right now you are down but you have to get up.  Only time will heal you broken heart  no words that we write will solve you problem but they will definately encourage you.\n\nRight now what you need is forget about men.  Do something that you like the most.  Take a break from your routine life and go for a vacation if possible take some girlfriends with you and have a good time.  U have to make things work for your self dear.  Just give your self a well deserved break from all and do something that you have never done before i am not saying that you will forget all your problems but at least they will become light.  Basically keep yourself occupied just do something or the other.  \n\nSome relationships work some don't but the hope should always be there.  \n\nI wish you all the best in life.  Good Luck
909173
Maybe in your heart you hoped that marriage would settle him down a little or you would feel more secure within the relationship.  Do you trust him?  Has he ever given you a reason not to trust him?  Maybe you just need to communicate your concerns with him so he can reassure you of where he stands in the marriage.  Almost any woman would feel the same way in your shoes, and you did marry pretty fast.  Before you married, did you know each others beliefs on marriage, vows, family, careers, finances?  These are some major issues that both of you should be on the same page with - if not, seek some support and guidence.
830879
I suggest you talk to her about it. Decide whether it is something you two can work through together, if it isn't then seriously consider calling off the marriage. You shouldn't accept that from anyone you are worth someone who is faithful. But people also do make mistakes. The question is can you ever forgive her? and is she someone you want to marry?
706236
Trust is one of the hardest issues to address in any relationship.  She broke your trust and its going to take a lot of work for that to ever be right again.  I would honestly get into some marriage counseling for this reason alone.
663853
I think you need to listen to your heart and make a decision. Don't stay married if you aren't TRUELY happy, it isn't worth it. Take some time to just think without any outside distractions. :)
485359
No, I wouldn't want to stay married because I feel trapped in marriage. I felt like I just, "settled" with my husband out of fear of being alone. I think he did the same, but is too proud to admit it. We aren't each others soul mate because we have NOTHING in common and do not have the same expectations in life. We simply got comfortable with each other and left it that way.
238939
It happened to me. My husband and my sister no less.  It ruined my marriage, even after 28 years I haven't forgiven him.  He ended up with a terminal illness- Multiple Sclerosis for 15 years. He passed away in 2004. I felt like I had to stay and help him.  His actions affected my relationship with my older son and my sister...not that she was worth a second chance. But, I did try.  My mother, father, and baby sister didn't talk to me for 15 years- yea, like it was my fault. My brother and I remained estranged until he passed away. All I did was stay with the guy.  Big mistake! My younger son is not really part of the family every one shuns him because he looks like my husband. My sister's daughter ended up being an outcast and tried to commit suicide twice. What should you do?  Move on...make a life for yourself, find someone that respects you and loves you for who you are now... don't wait it will only hurt you! I am 53 back in college and making a life for myself for the first time. I have never been happier. I plan on traveling and staying alive! With as much enthusiasum as possible..If you need to have someone beside you I am sure that there will be that certain someone around the corner.  For myself, I just love being myself. One day maybe I'll meet someone but, for now my happiness and peace of mind it what counts to me.
258998
Hey man I know where you are coming from. My wife just told me that cheated on me with another man about 2 months ago. I went nutts, but not too bad. Luckily she told me at our preachers house. After she told me I did not know what to do. Because in the bible it states that that is the only reason for divorce. I sat down and talked with her and the preacher. We agreed that we would stay together. I wanted to leave her but then I didn't. I love her so much, and not only because we have kids. I am still having a hard time getting over it. Like I said it has already been 2 months since she told me and I still can not sleep nor trust her. There are still times when I want to leave but I can't because I love her too much. Also you don't want to go out and do the same thing she did. It won't do any good, except have a burden on your shoulders. Just hang in there man. Pray about it and see what God wants you to do. God Bless!
874740
Second marriages are extremely difficult especially when you have children from a previous marriage and emotional baggage.  If you loved her enough to marry her, you should love her enough to get help.  Go to couples counseling or therapy.  Don't focus so much on the negative but focus on those things that brought you together in the first place.  Also remember that you have 4 children looking at you both and learning about relationships from you.  Couple's shouldn't run the opposite way when the going gets tough.  Realize that she's different and she has issues that maybe have never been dealt with.  Be patient and forgiving.  Don't be so quick to throw your marriage away.  Do everything in your power to save the marriage.  Don't give up.  Seek help ASAP!!  Good luck!
350706
I know how you feel. My ex-wife was cheating on me with one of my best friends. We also got divorced, and it was really rough for me for the first year or so. Every part of my life changed, all the routines changed, had to get used to being alone. There is no easy fix when your betrayed by someone you love and trust. Seems like everything you believed in was a lie. It helped me to lean on my family for support. It was hard at first because I felt ashamed, but believe me, you don't want to go it alone. Turn to your friends and family for help. Keep your mind busy, take a night class or something. It helps. Why did he do it? She told him what he wanted to hear. Maybe he thought he wouldn't get caught. Don't get caught up in the why and how, it will only make it worse. Don't get down on yourself, or blame yourself. He chose to do what he did, knowing that he was married. You didn't force him to do it, and you couldn't have done anything differently to prevent him from doing it. You are still a worthwhile human being, and you still have your life ahead of you. As time goes by, it will get easier. You might even realize one day, that your life is better now than it was then. Keep your head up, and good luck.
1181298
I'm a male in my second marriage who married a woman who hadn't been married previously and its worked out great. In fact I'm glad the first marriage didn't work and we have been together 20 years and I would marry her again tommorrow. I'm sure your fiance was just meaning the second time around would be best for himself. Communication and genuine friendship is the key and humor is also very important. We often tease each other in a lighthearted manner. Also we have 2 children whom we are very proud of.
244799
like a fool i took mine back and we were married a week later, but i still find it hard to trust him. even tho hes the one who told me he was cheating. we have been married for 2 years now and together 6 and so far he hasnt done it again ( that im a ware of) if i had it to do over i would have left him.
255395
I've been there.I've been married three times.Why?Because I cheated on my husband(s)and felt guilty!Tell your wife and let her decide what you should do.She will probably divorce you then you can do what you want.If you cheat again you will start that vicious cycle all over. Don't cheat!
1027627
Wuss! wha happened to good and bad times!\n\nDo youhave the capacity to love and work your way through this like a man or are you a coward that will run away!\n\nIF she did not commit adultery and betray you you should honor yor vow and stick it out!!!1
389620
Look in the mirror. You are looking at a married woman. Why did you get married in the first place if you weren't prepared for a commitment.  "I do" doesn't mean " until something better comes along". Forget this guy unless you are able to remain "just friends". I feel sorry for your husband!
621933
Hun, you like me,got married for the wrong reason,the love was not really there , but it was for the child you had together, to legitimate her, it happens a lot , but most of all as you and I have found out, it's harder to stay , you have to be happy for you and your little lady, and I would say to find a new love and move on, don't leave you two in a bad situation, there is, as they say, true happiness out there for all.  God bless  and good luck Follow your heart.
66807
...wish to share, am a returner favourer kinda person.\n\n1.26 11:51p est Stupendous Man, silly of me to confuse you with that little guy Calvin, guess I thought he looked a little like you.\nFor me it would depend what those differences were. If we're talking about weaknesses in character, then have to say I have seen that used as a weapon, friend on friend, sibling on sibling, and of course spouse on spouse. \nI had a realization once that I turned into a caution motto, "There is no one in this world who loves you so much as to not say a negative thing about you behind your back." (yes, very familiar with feeling betrayed, but let's leave that) And I guess a similar expression would be, "There isn't likely to be anyone in this world who loves you enough, never to hold your weaknesses against you." Whether that weakness is being too emotional or not emotional enough, or having to much to say or not being able to verbalize worth a poo, ya know the contrast between one personality and it's opposite.\n\nI guess what I am getting to, is that it's possible to love someone and know they have this difference about them, and SOMETHING ELSE gets in between you, and in the course of having it out one spouse retaliates with pointed references to this "difference". IT ISN'T because they were always really bothered by it and just never brought it up before, it's more that they were running out of arguments about the actual issue at hand, and needed some grounds to prove their "right"geousness in the fallout.\nFeeling misunderstood on both sides is where the real problem is. It's not necessarily a communication breakdown, it could be the gradually ending of sympathy, feeling unequal in a relationship, feeling undervalued. Then it's "who cares if you're sensitive about this difference, I want to right no matter the cost, I want to be heard whatever might fly from my lips"\nIt's sad and unnecessary, but it comes from people's focus on theirselves. If more people tried to see it from the opposing perspective this world would be a much more peacful place.