Am I wrong to look for a relationship when I'm suffering from a terminal illness?
826222
No!  You are not wrong to look for a relationship.  Being alone is very scary because you have no one to talk to and share your fears with.  No one to embrace you through those difficult times.\n\n If you have a terminal illness, that means that you have but a short time to live.  People normally look for a long term relationship so that they can invest their lives in it.  You have a known limited time to live, so investing their time and emotions in you is short, and roller coaster like because you could go at anytime.  It would take a very special person whom is willing to overlook your condition, and there are not too many of those around.\n\nIf you do not want to die alone, seek your family out and spend it with them.  If you are not in speaking terms, this is the time to mend fences!  If you do not have any family,  find a Bible believing Church with support groups whom will be there for you and with you.\nSpend more time with God.\n   If your terminal illness is related to sexual immorality ask God for forgiveness!  He is listening and hurting for you; because He loves you!\nIf you need someone to talk to, I will make it so that "you" can IM me!  It is not what you are looking for, but having someone to talk to can help you through the hard times.\nWrite a little note under your message and I will work it out to communicate with you.\nGod's Blessings and All My Best Wishes
94743
NO.\n\nThere are lots of people who will never have a meaningful relationship. \n\nIt has a lot to do with how well you can adapt to someone else's life. If you want to share a life with another person, you need to be willing to change your own to fit theirs. \n\nIf you are waiting for someone that you don't have to make any changes for, chances are, you will be lonely for the rest of your life.
232132
hey sweetie keep ur head up. u just might be look'n in the wrong place, don't look for love let it find you. its not just you,
813896
Theres always someone out there for everyone. Dont feel down. You'll find that person soon.
1069871
My best guess is that you don't think that it is wrong (even after you do it).  My best solution would be that you seek some psychiatric help (I mean that in a good way).\nEven a better solution is that you go to a bar or something and seek a permanent soul mate (if you don't have one).
1116729
I am a single mom and have bascially been single, minus a few not-so-serious relationships, now for seven years. I've gone through periods when I've seriously been looking for someone to settle down with and  times when I've been desperately lonely but hadn't the energy to try again. \n\nThe one thing I HAVE learned over the past few years of dating and not dating, is not to ever settle for less than what you deserve. It may mean that you may go through years of being alone but I truly believe it is much better to be alone than with someone who is not right for you. \n\nDepending on your situation, I think the possiblities of where and how to meet a potential boyfriend are endless. Start spending time on yourself. Go places that interest you.....put yourself out there.......everywhere, with and without your child(ren). Chances are that if you meet this person at a museum or maybe a through other family members, other than the bar scene, you'll have more in common. \n\nDon't  dwell on the fact that you're single; sometimes it shows and you may look a little desperate and then definately will attract the wrong type of guy who could possibly be an oportunist looking for his next prey. When you start doing more just for you and your family you WILL start to feel better about yourself and your situation. It is this positivity that most definately attract the right type of people and soon enough you will realize that being alone isn't a curse and THAT"S when Mr Right is bound to step in and like you for who you are.
872118
well the previous answers are all right...dont go looking for it; magicaly it will come to you...there is a saying in spanish "mejor sola que mal acompanada" which means "its best to be alone, rather than be with bad company" When a person is imature and not ready for a relationship they will lie and they will cheat because they are not ready and far to imature. remember to be true to yourself and to others...dont change or pretend to be what your not... there is a fit for every shoe... so just be a little more patient... there are date search sites... which might be a good thing to distract yourself with...but dont get too carried away\ni know ppl who have gotten into a spot of trouble going into those things... so just enjoy life while you can...
906750
I know that frienship is not like how you've been treated- being 'hit on', and it's not what you're looking for. What you ARE looking for is someone you can talk to, hang out with, maybe even casually date. Without having to worry about them wanting to have more than what you're willing to give. And right now, all you're willing to give is some of your time to spend with a person who really cares about YOU, and not your body.  If I'm right, please give me 'best answer', and contact me-  im1friend@yahoo.com  Your friend, Kevin B.
203108
You have this disease for a reason.  God wants to work through you to help other people.  Perhaps there's a purpose still for you in this world.  Sometimes people who are ill and still show love and tell of God's love and kindness can have the greatest effect on others.  That's the way it was for my grandmother who brought more people to believe in God while she was bedridden than she ever did before her brain tumor.  God has a wonderful plan for you, even if it's difficult to see through the pain.  Remember--it is only temporary, even though it seems forever.  I would suggest reading:  Psalm 38, and 91, and the story of Job (in the book of Job)
1168225
I think the uninvolved people may be inclined to say no, especially in the instance of paralysis but you may be suprised at how truly caring for someone would cause you to reconsider, because truly caring for someone will cause you to try to go through it right there with them. Just remember someone in a wheelchair is someone that's a person, a person with feelings and emotions too. For those of you who wound'nt date a person in a wheelchair think about the person not the wheelchair. Think about this? What if you really fell in love with someone and then all of a sudden your so called love one ends up in an accident and ends up in a weelchair would you leave them because of it. Think of being in a wheelchair yourself and not having any dates because of it and your a wonderful person how would you feel.
1164838
If you don't want to marry her.. Don't be forced into something you don't want to do..\nRegarding your condition..I'm sure you have your reasons for not sharing this with those that love you. This is something you should not be going through alone. If you have a life threatening disease you should really have those that love you involved. Imagine they not knowing, knowing the thought you kept this to yourself. Please allow them to be with you during this time, by having their support may also help you to heal and fight this disease.
85743
I understand how you feel. But most people won't. They don't get it possibly because they didn't experience this level of love. I think that when they insist on your dating again, they are merely trying to bring you to their own level. If they make you date, they will feel less guilty about their readiness to date when their own partner dies.\nSo it's not really about you, but about their selfish interests. Which is why it is hard for you to change their minds. Sorry.
392758
You'll meet the right person wether you're into dating or not. There isn't anything wrong with you, I don't much take any interest in dating either, Although I'm only 13. (well i'll be 14 May 1st). But I don't find it very enjoyable. I enjoy just sitting around on the computer most the day and leaving for school and church, There's nothing wrong with you. Or there would be something wrong with me too. So it's ok, You wont be alone forever unless it's meant in gods eyes for you to be. Which I don't think that's so cause god made man and women to be togather. So you wont be alone forever, just have faith. All things are done through god. oh, and Good Luck finding your true love.
325842
Be sincere...!!! Just tell him that you're sick for the time being & you can't see or date with him. And, if he don't believe you, just ask him to come over to see your condition. I believe he would be understand. Don't be afraid to be sincere. Because, it's   the best way to make people like you...!!! :-) Wish you well soon...!!!
552682
Please accept my sympathy for your loss.\n\nI think it depends on the individual as well as the circumstances of the death.  Some times if the deceased was sick for a long time the widower can sometimes move on a little sooner than someone who was suddenly and unexpectedly widowed because they have had time to prepare.  The main thing is to have peace in your heart and not to get involved only to find you weren't ready and then hurt someone.  You also have to factor in your children and their ages.  It might help to talk to them before you start pursuing the dating field again and make sure that they understand if you find someone you like they won't be "replacing" their mother.  The fact that you are asking makes me believe that you yourself think you are ready but are worried that other people may think its too soon.  True friends will be supportive no matter what and should be happy that you are ready to attempt to find the second love of your life.  Don't worry about other people. Do whats makes you happy and what's best for you and your children.  Good luck!!!
612891
ABSOLUTELY NOT!\n\nBecause some one is single, it could be that they are not looking at this time for a "mate".  \n\nIt could be that they havent met "MR/MRS RIGHT"\n\nIt maybe that they are simply not looking for something permanent, focusing on thier careers, school work, or other intersts, and find that a relationship could hinder them in what they are trying to achieve.\n\nIt maybe that no one asks them out!\n\nIt maybe that the person is shy, or lack self esteem on thier part, and wont talk to people, thus are going to be lonely for a very long time, if not until they are old.\n\nJust some reasons, out of a million and one reason...\n\nI wish you well...\n\nJesse
35512
I think I would perhaps check with your local online sites or perhaps one of the national dating sites.  \nIt must be really difficult knowing that the woman you love is incapacitated and can never come back to you, but I certainly understand the need to find companionship and love in spite of loving your wife.  \nI hope that her suffering and yours aren't too long lived and that you can find a measure of happiness.  And you really shouldn't pay attention to ignorant young people who criticize you without taking a moment to try to understand the position you're in.  \nGood luck and my prayers are with you.