Are you born with gay tendencies, or is it personal preference?
814044
It is sort of complicated... at least; in my opinion it does. For example, when I was younger I knew that I was not like every other male, but now that I am older I know for a fact that I am who I am. A homosexual. When I was younger I dated several female friends whom I still keep in contact with now... \n\nThat question "Nature or Nurture?" is hard. I believe that people are born the way that they are born, but grow up to be who they are. \n\nA path was chosen, but from then on we make ourselves out to who we choose to be... I hope my answer helps you on your paper dear... Email me anytime.
647576
It may be that conditioning may have a very small part of a person being gay but it would be a very small percentage of gay people that are effected in this way. However, I do think that the majority of gay people are born with this disposition.\n\n'God' doews not make nature perfect. for instance, I am sure that most of you have heard of a condition called hermaphroditism (or the more politically correct term these days is 'intersex') where a person is born with the fully formed genatalia of BOTH sexes. The subject, apart from their genitalia, is physically and mentally sound in every other way.\n\nSometimes, these children are operated on at birth if the doctors decide (guess) that the baby appears to have a female or male inclination and the genitals are modified accordingly. In many cases though, a modified 'girl' grows up with feelings for other women and modified 'boys' grow up feeling something for other men. It seems in these cases, the doctors have made the wrong decision and the psychological makeup of the child was in fact the opposite to the physical modification they performed on the child. So even though, for instance, a child may be brought up as a girl with girls toys etc, the 'nature' side of the brain kicks in at puberty (if not before) and overrides the 'nurture' side.\n\nNow, if nature can produce a visible, physical example of developmental confusion on the outside of the human body, who is to say that there are not processes at work of developmental confusion going on inside the unseen brain of a person ... where there may not be an obvious physical example of gender disorientation externally but internally their brain does not dictate in the way that their external body would suggest to the rest of society.\n\nThere is very strong evidence that sexuality is largely determined by development in the womb. Perhaps, while 'intersex' is firm external physical proof of developmental issues, we ought to consider that perhaps the developmental differences in gay people are more subtle and obviously invisible to the naked eye due to the brain being internal - but that does not mean that the differences are not there.\n\nHomosexuality has been around since the beginning of time and if you research gay history in cultures across the world, the present prejudices seem to stem with the spread of the three major monotheistic religons and it is this prejudice that is ingrained into the psyche of people today. But like racism, for instance, perhaps this prejudice towards gay people will diminish as society recognises that alternative sexuality is actually just a normal part of nature's rich diversity.
420351
Go with how you feel. Are heterosexuals that way because of a choice they made, I don't think so. That would be the same for homosexuals, I'm sure, not a choice, but something "inbuilt" from birth.
873254
Think of it as a whole spectrum, not just 3 categories.  On one end of the spectrum, you have completely straight, on the other end, you have completely gay, but in between there are all sorts of levels of preference.  If you can be with a girl AND guy at all, you're bi, but you seem to prefer men; and that's fine.  I'm also bi but prefer men (and I married one).  By the way, once is "normal" for a guy, and anything more than that is impressive.  :)
39794
I don't believe there is such a thing as being born gay. There has been no scientific data to back it up, though rumors say there is. (If anybody could show me some, from credible doctors, I'd appreciate it). Just having sexual thought about another member of the same sex doesn't make a person gay. Curiosity is natural. This is really one of those "try it and see how it works out" kind of deals
522359
being gay? no.  you are,or are not.\n\nacting on same sex attraction?  yes.\n\nnot acting on same sex attraction to please others, rather than living the way you're built to? also a choice, but a stupid one.
557616
gay is a sexual preference NOT a song preference!\nyoure okay,if anyone calls you gay because you like a song theyre ignorant.You should stay away from ignorant people who judge people because of what they like.theres nothing wrong with being gay anyway,i'd rather be gay than ignorant!!!!(i'm straight but does it matter?)
898091
although we see this question literally dozens of times a day, I'll answer again.  definitely born gay, not chosen.  you can't choose your sexual orientation any more than you can choose your skin or eye color.  \nand, considering there's still a lot of bigots out there, would you "choose" to be someone who's discriminated against?
1105074
Well... I am gay... Don't really think I was born gay, as a child I never really thought about having sex with people. Male or female, when I was in grade school I had girlfriends which I ended up dumping because I found them boring. Never really thought about having sex with them either, nor did I have that sexual urge to experiment and play "Doctor" with these girls. My first sexual experience was with my best friend, behind a shed with him humping me. Yes, I know. Sounds perverted and it was only humping but from the moment on it was like... That wasn't sooooo bad. Then this boy and I had a whole love triangle thing going on with this girl we both liked, draaaaama. During this time in school, about six grade I started to have these feelings for some of the boys in my class. Like... Odd to explain, urges to like touch them. Not really sexually, I just wanted to be around them a lot and touching them... lol\n\nHigh School, was... High School... So, bleh. Was popular enough to not be a geek or nerd but not enough so that I was hanging out with cheerleaders. Football players maybe, it really is odd. Even then football players would stick up for me if anyone ever even tried to make fun of me. That is mostly why I find it odd that people act the way they do on here, I've been really sheltered from Gay Bashing... Since... Everyone I've known has seemingly liked me for who I am not who I wish to have a relationship with. Besides of course my mother, who says I am going to hell.\n\nI am tired and rambling, sorry. I believe you become gay, not always by your own actions. You have no way to control being either way, it just happens. You can't blame something on just being born that way... I never have. I am who I am, there is not enough prayer in the world that could make me straight. Women just bore me, no offence girls, they always have.
385270
I personally believe that it is a combination of genetics and environment.  It is never a "choice"...  Some people are predisposed to being attracted to the same sex by genetics, and other people are predisposed only under certain conditions.  There are also people that no matter what happens to them in their life they will never ever be gay.  Being gay is what arouses a person.  For me personally, a man does nothing for me... but a woman I find very arousing.  Its just the way I am, and no matter how I try to imagine myself with a man, it just does not work.  It feels very wrong and uncomfortable.  It does not feel natural.  A woman feels very natural, as Im sure it feels to a straight man.  I am a follower of God, and I believe that as long as we love, we are good.  Hate is what opposes the Lord, not love, no matter what form... whether I love my dog, my child, or my girlfriend, its still love, and only good can come from love.  Hate, ignorance, deception and misunderstanding are not good, therefore they are not following the Lord's path.  \n\nThere are gay animals by the way.. have you ever heard of the Bonobo Chimpanzees?  Look them up and their sexual behavior... you will find they are the most sexually free of any species on the planet, it doesnt matter if you are male or female.
1103433
Yes and thank you for your email. I've never wished I was gay although the girls would often acuse me of being gay. I've never desired or even thought I was gay. I've always Loved being out with lady friends but sometimes they expect sex and I'm just not interested in them that way. But some times I do find someone I'm in Love with not in a sexual way but I'd like to be by her side.I think about sex if that would keep her by my side.But by the time I'm ready for that, she's already found herself another man.
373801
no i deont like gays anyway...\ni like pure men,...
1067809
When you're gay (like half the people who commented on this probably arent, so they dont get it) you don't choose it.  Theres a point where you realize you are different... and its usually kinda scary.  So yeah, its natural.  If not then why do most upper forms of mammalian life do it?  Hmm?  \n\nHello?  You idiots out there with no idea what its really like to be gay?  Tell me something,.. do you think we would CHOOSE to be something that gets us beaten up, politically isolated and denied some of our basic human rights?  Get real... telling us gay is not natural and we should get with the opposite sex is like telling you to hook up with someone of your own sex.
268906
Well I am sorry it makes you sick.  Not everything or every one is the way we all would like.  Some what disappointing I know.  As for WHY would someone like to be gay? I will tell you something.  I am happy with my lifestyle now. I am happy with the woman I am with.  But there was a period where I wasn't so sure.  Why you wonder.  Because my mother disowned me because of it.  My father bought books to see if they had the answers, maybe he did something wrong.  Or my personal favorite what my high school finding out and my teacher telling me I shouldn't eat with the other kids because it bothers them. \nDoes this sound like something we CHOSE?  Does this sound like something we ASKED for?  \nWe are stronger for the things we go through, doesnt mean we ask for the turmoil along the way.
192260
Well, MY OPINION (as there is no scientific proof) would be that it is genetic.\n\nFace it, in a society where homosexuals are RIDICULED, would you choose to be gay?  \n\nAlso, do you CHOOSE to be heterosexual?  Do you CHOOSE to brown eyed? Left handed? 6ft tall?\n\nOh, and if they can prove that alcoholism is genetic (there is proof of this), why can't homosexuality be genetic?
382455
dear you have yourself answered your own question. you knew that you were gay at puberty and that's how it goes. we are born this special way. it isnt any thing to choose. tell me one thing why would anyone choose to be gtay when society at large is biased against us/hates us?? \n\nwe dont choose to be what we are. we are born what we are. we can choose to polish ourselves and be better human beings, but not change the way we inherently are.
918768
Genetics may play a partial role in sex-preference but there is no "gay gene".  Obviously this would be an evolutionary dead-end.  It is more likely a combination of genetics and childhood development.