Any "Your Momma Jokes"?
831497
Yo mamma is so fat it takes TWO buses and a train to get on her good side.
180673
101? I ONLY HAVE MY BEST 3 JOKES...HOPE IT DOESN'T OFFEND U\n\n1\n\nFresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\n2\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\n\n3\n\nThe mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's \nhouse. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her \ndaughter-in-law standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" she asked.\n\n"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the \ndaughter-in-law \nanswered.\n\n"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.\n\n"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.\n\n"Love dress? But you're naked!"\n\n"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it \nmakes me \nhappy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home \nfrom \nwork any minute."\n\nThe mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the \nway \nhome she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed, \nshowered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally \nher \nhusband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" he asked.\n\n"This is my love dress" she replied.\n\n"Needs ironing." he said.\n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
221179
Yo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind.\n\nYo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl.\n\nYo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!\n\nYo mama so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!\n\nYo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!\n\nYo mama so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."\n\nYo mama so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!\n\nYo mama so stupid when the computer said "press any key to continue" she couldn't find the any key. \n \nYo mama so stupid she got a doughnut and returned it cause it had a hole in it.
58298
Laugh My Mother F*cking Butt Off
1036139
i just received this joke from a text message..\n\nthere is this boyfriend and girlfriend..\nbf: "hon, let's do 69!"\ngf: "what is 69?"\nbf: "it's easy.."\n\nthen they positioned theirselves..\nwhile in that position, the boy farted 4 times..\n\nthen the girl reacted and said "omg! i cant do this anymore! i cant take anymore the remaining 65!"\n\nlolz..
713527
Yo Momma is so stupid she climbed over a clear glass wall just to see what was on the other side.\n\n Yo Momma is so poor when she was kicking one of those empty cans down the street, I walked up to her and asked, "What are you doing?" She replied, "I'm movin'!"\n\n Yo Momma is so dumb she took a spoon to the superbowl.\n\n Yo Momma is so fat that when she jumped into the air and got stuck. \n\n Yo Momma is so fat that when she jumped into the ocean to go diving, the whales came up to her singing, "We are family! Even though you're bigger than me!"\n\n Yo Momma is so fat that when she went to Japan the Sumo Wrestlers came around to her shouting, "We are family, sister!"\n\n Yo Momma is so ugly that when she went to go enter the yearly Ms. Ugly Halloween pagent, the judges said, "Sorry, ma'am. No professionals allowed."\n\nHow is that? Appropriate.
330597
Yo momma so dirty she has to creep up on bathwater. \nYo momma so greasy she sweats Crisco! \nYo momma so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her \nYo momma teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles! \nYo momma teeth are so yellow she spits butter! \nYo momma teeth are so yellow I can't believe its not butter \nYo momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs. \n Yo momma so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex. \nYo momma so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared. \nYo momma house so small she has to go outside to eat a large pizza. \nYo momma house so small you have to go outside to change your mind. \nYo momma house so dirty roaches ride around on dune buggies! \nYo momma house so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside. \nYOUR MAMA SO FAT WHEN SHE WENT ON THE SCALE IT SAID TO BE CONTINUED!\n\nYOUR MAMA SO FAT EVERY TIME  SHE TURNS AROUND ITS HER BIRTHDAY!\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT YOU NEED A ROAD MAP TO FIND YOUR WAY AROUND HER!\n\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT, PEOPLE CAME AND STARTED PLAYING TWISTER ON HER POLKA DOT DRESS.\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT, SHE FELL IN LOVE AND BROKE IT.
828399
yo momma underware is soo holy when she farts it whistles \n\nyo momma is like a buss shes big,she smells bad and is only 1 minute to ride\n\ni think those are pretty good
613634
draikcor\n6 minutes ago\n\n\n \n your mama is so fat that when she went into a sushi restaurant, the cooks chopped her up for sushi.\n\nyour momma so stupid when she was screaming in an envelope i asked wat r u doing she said i was trying to send a voice mail\n\nyour momma so stupid when she was walking she saw a bus of white people and started yelling Catch that twinkie, and when she got to the bus she said wheres the cream filling \n\nyour moma so fat when she went to japan and saw godzill, godzilla had to chop her up to very small pieces to eat her\n\nyour mama is so fat when she went outer space, astronauts thought she was an alien motherboard ship that was gonna blow up Earth.\n\nyour mama is so stupid when she was playing on the computer and shooting aliens i asked her wat r u doing and she said im trying to say take me to your leader.\n\nlike u have any jokes to tell and about the rollerblading that is pure gay
402870
these yo mamma jokes in another question\n\nYo momma's so dumb when she saw under 17 not admitted sign she went home and got 16 friends\nYo momma's so poor each night she goes to KFC to lick other folks fingers\nYo momma's so old one of her pets was on on Noahs Ark\nYo momma's so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone\nYo momma's so dumb she passed by YMCA and said hey look they spelled MACYs wrong\nYo momma's so poor people rob her house for practice\nYo momma's so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals\nYo momma's so poor she married young just to get the rice \nyo mamma so fat, that when she jumps for joy, she gets stuck!\nyo mamma so fat, that she needs to use a bookmark, to find her belly button\nyo mamma so fat that when she walks by the television screen, you miss 3 seasons of friends
136593
your mama is so ugly that when she went to an ugly competition the juges told her, sorry, no professionals\n\nyour mama is so stupid that when something threw a cup at her she said she got mugged.\n\nyour mamas teeth are so yellow i cant believe its not butter!\n\nyour mamas so ugly that when her mama gave birth, she tried to send a return slip.\n\nyour mamas so fat that when she finally turns all the way around, she gets a welcome back party\n\nyour mamas so stupid it takes her an hour to cook minute rice. \n\nyour mamas so stupid she got hit by a parked car. (old but still great!)\n\ni could go on and on but my hands ache. check some more out at aha.com
411755
i saw your momma kicking a can down the street the other day ..... she said she was moving home\n\nyour momma like the town bike ..... everyone gets a ride\n\nshes big she round you bounce her on the ground..... ya momma your momma
979589
i don't have all of 'em, but i do have a few funny ones. yo' mama is so fat:\n1. when she was floating in the ocean, spain claimed her as the new world\n 2.when she sat on the rainbow, skittles came out\n3. when i slapped her thigh, i rode the waves and went bye-bye\n\ngo to http://ahajokes.com or http://yomama.com for a complete list
350094
yo mamma so fat she irons her pants on the drive way\nYo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller \n\nYo momma so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out. \nYo momma so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon\nYo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight! \n\nYo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning. \n\nYo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
910889
OMG this joke is one of my favorites!!! Got any more?
1006859
yo mama is so skinny, i went to give her a hug and i split in half\n\n\nyo mama's breathe is soooo nasty, her teeth packed up and left.\n\n\nyo mama is sooo fat, she went swimmin in the ocean and shamu was singing "We are fam-i-ly!"\n\n\nYo mama is soooo dumn, i told her to turn the tv on so she starts rubbing her boobies and lickin her lips!!
75448
YOUR MAMA IS SO POOR, SHE CAN'T PAY ATTENTION.\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT,SHE FARTS SPAM.\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT,SHE PEE'S CANOLA OIL.