My grandma died, and I am having a hard time dealing with it...?
813261
Do not feel guilty b/c you still need to grieve.  No one can you how to react to this situation, you need to do what feels right to you.  Own your grief, anger, and sadness.  You will learn to celebrate her life, but right now you are overwhelmed with her death.  Do try to celebrate her memory but also be respectful to your feelings.  Try a tradition that you and your grandmother did together.  Go visit her grave and talk with her. Pray that she will find happiness in her death and always remember she is by your side.
463660
I'm very sorry for your losses. Allow yourself to grieve, even if you have to be strong for everyone else. Find someone you can talk about it with, even if they only listen. Find a friend to talk to that has lost someone and can understand how you are feeling. You could also find an online chat for people dealing with a loss. I hope things get better.
117257
Sounds all too familiar with me.  My grandmother, who basically raised me also and was also my friend and support system, passed away almost two years ago...and I still haven't let go.  I still find myself sitting and thinking and ending up in tears because I miss her so much.  It is very difficult, but you have to remind yourself that she is still with you everywhere you go, and no matter who you become.  She will always be with you because it was she who helped to shape you into who you are today...you'll never forget that.  How do you get over that?  You just deal with it day by day and it will get better.  You might also want to keep something near you that she'd given you, or something that reminds you of her...if you need to talk to her, hold it, and speak your mind.  I know it sounds stupid, but it works.  \n\nIf you do, however, feel that things are getting way out of hand, maybe you should consider therapy.  I probably should have!  :)  Just keep your head up and remember the good things...you'll be fine.  My condolences....
1154365
It took me over a year of solitary struggle before I wised up and contacted my local (150 miles away!) Alzheimer's support group... It was the best thing I could have done for both of us! They have excellent information on every aspect of caring for you, your family and the one affected. \nIf it is a close family member (in my case my mom) who lives with you, this disease will impact every facet of your life and can rapidly become overwhelming. The support provided by others in the same situation can be priceless.\nThere is so much you can do to make everyone's life so much easier... from learning how to prevent inadvertently making your loved ones mental outlook worse to helping your children deal with the changes and irrationality. (I have provided a link below to a Chapter search.) They have a good information packet they can send and meetings you can attend if you are close enough. \nMy heart and prayers go out to you... This disease can be devastating for all involved. It can also have moments you will forever treasure as you help your loved one through this final transition with compassion and understanding.\nMy mother is gone now and though it was the most difficult and traumatic 5 years I ever endured, I don't regret one day of the experience.
1161714
you have to talk to someone... that's odd...\nI'm sorry about your loss... and I know it's a really hard thing to go through and deal with... but you have to hang in there and get some help...
374494
I understand how you feel I lost my grandmother the same way. We were close and I am sure you were with your grandmother, she just wants to comfort you and let you know she still loves and not to be discouraged because she will all ways be there to watch over you. Don't be afraid it will all be okay.
243329
Please know that you are in my morning prayers.  I know your pain over your losses seem unbearable, but remember that He is holding you up, and even when you don't feel Him, that is when He is closest!  It took someone else's pain to remind of that this morning and I hope and pray as you grieve your loss that you can keep that thought in your mind.  It was explained to me that we have at least forty thousand thoughts a day, and that if you can keep those thoughts positive, your body and emotion will respond.  What a man thinks in his heart, so is he, right?\n\nMay God help you thru this time, may you keep your eyes toward heaven, may God use your grandchild to bless you for years to come, and may He help you raise her in grace and gratefulness for the opportunity to serve your daughter's memory.  Father, please enable a good report from the Drs to encourage this sister in the Lord thru her trials.  May she see many blessings thru her call for prayer, strentgthen her faith and trust in You as she walks the same path we all must take for your names sake. Amen.
297832
Write to her and tell her how she's made you feel, and how her actions have affected you. I'm sorry you are having a hard time. Do you get the chance to talk to your dad about these things? An aunt, uncle, grandparent, Godparent, teacher, councilor? Find someone off that list that you feel at ease with, and just let it all out. They know you better than anyone else you could hear from on this thing. Those are the people you should be talking to sweetie.
1004592
First, I am so sorry for your lose. It is going to take time. My brother passed away in 1998. And to this day I still miss him so much.  What I did for my brother is I put together a memorial run in his honor. By memorial run I am referring to a motorcycle run. I meant for this to be a one and only type run to help me in dealing with his passing. He was only 49 when he died. The run was such a success that I did this run for five years. OH just for your info ANY and ALL money raised from this event I donated to Veterans homes. But this worked for me. What might help you is, if there was a favorite place your grandpa liked to go. Then go there, sit down and talk to him. I know this sounds crazy, BUT you'd be surprised how much it will help you. But know in your heart that Grandpa would want you to be happy for him as he is in a much better place now, and he is waiting for you to join him in another 70 years or so. You might also think about having a mass in his honor on some Sunday in the future. It's summer now, so maybe you can have a cookout with your family. And make sure to set a place for Grandpa. Really, I'm not kidding. You'd really be surprised. But I hope I have helped you in your time. If you want send me an e-mail if you have questions. Take care and God Bless you and Grandpa. I'm sure Grandpad is proud to say from above "That's MY grand daughter"
879267
You will NEVER feel the same..BUT you don't have to hurt...thinking about her and remembering her is wonderful....it will be painful for a time but if it lasts too long talk to a priest or get therapy. I lost 2 children and my father. It hurt like hell for years and years and years...BUT I got help also I decided THEY don't want me to suffer and I will see them again in HEAVEN.....so I no longer suffer. I talk up at the sky to them at night here and there..the times get  less often but they are everywhere.....do whatever makes you feel at peace.....but remember she loves you and doesn't want you hurting..rmemmber the good times and if it helps say you are sorry for the bad times..she can hear you and you will feel better!
390778
My dad died a few months before your dad did.  He had lung cancer that spread throughout his body.  I was there with him when he died, as was my mom and the hospice nurse.  I can feel your pain.  All I can tell you is what I believe.  I believe my dad heard me when I told him that it was time for him to go; that I would take care of my mom.  He heard me and knew that I loved him.  The pain will never entirely disappear, but it gets easier.  There are difficult weeks and months (anniversary of his death, his birthday, holidays), but overall it gets easier.  I will tell you that if it is not getting easier by this point, you may be stuck in the grief process and would benefit from talking to someone, a counselor or minister perhaps.\n\nMy heart goes out to you!
376683
Sounds all too familiar with me. My grandmother, who basically raised me  and was also my friend and support system, passed away a little over two years ago...and I still haven't let go. I still find myself sitting and thinking and ending up in tears because I miss her so much. It is very difficult, but you have to remind yourself that she is still with you everywhere you go, and no matter who you become. She will always be with you because it was she who helped to shape you into who you are today...you'll never forget that. How do you get over that? You just deal with it day by day and it will get better. You might also want to keep something near you that she'd given you, or something that reminds you of her...if you need to talk to her, hold it, and speak your mind. I know it sounds stupid, but it works. \n\nIf you do, however, feel that things are getting way out of hand, maybe you should consider therapy. I probably should have! :) Just keep your head up and remember the good things...you'll be fine. My condolences....
724397
You would probably want to tell your daughter that losing a family member is hard and difficult especially if they are very close, but being a good friend and show that you are a good friend is always a good route. She needs to understand that losing someone take time to settle in their life, that losing someone like a grandmother is hard and very unsettling, so it will not be quite normal for  a while. Tell your daughter to help her friend as much as friend could. For instance when my grand mother past away, all I wanted was to remember her and never forget her. So we did things she always liked when I was a child. ex: Polished her silver ware, planted flowers to remind me that she was always there. (built a photo frame for her picture) and painted rocks that had our names on it! It is good to remind them of all the good things that they did together. And tell her it will be hard and tuff, but if she feels like crying that she should always let it out and not be afraid too. It was hard as a child to lose a grandmother, but she's still very young at mind to understand all of it! May be this would help!
734724
I am so sorry to hear about your mom. my mom pass away not long ago so  I know your pain, I can tell you that you never stop missing her and it's hard around the holidays. I will pray for you that God comforts you doing your time of sorrow. he already has your mom and although you miss her and still need her she is pain free and in a better place.
1088396
Oh hon, what you just experienced is completely normal :)\n\nEveryone has emotional triggers. These triggers are usually our heart-strings. They are the things or areas in our lives w/unresolved issues or feelings.\n\nAlso, since you were crying about the death of your grandmother from 3 yrs ago, it’s not unusual to be experiencing another stage of the grieving process. Sometimes it can take yrs. Each person grieves differently & at different rates. In today’s society where we have more demands of our time, emotions & resources more than ever, it’s not uncommon for someone to not have finished the grieving process, even several yrs later. Often we don’t allow ourselves the time TO grieve so that we can complete it so that we can heal from it.\n\nAllow yourself to grieve. Also, don’t be afraid to explore w/your therapist why this is effecting you so. It sounds like there could be another reason there, under all this, that you may need to work on. \n\nIt’s not unusual to have one thing lead to another. Like w/what happened w/you today. You were discussing one thing & it eventually lead to talking about the death of your grandmother. The reason this/these things happen like that is because of the reasons that link them. These are your triggers.\n\nBest of luck to you!\n\nBtw, I’ve spent a few yrs in therapy myself & have had this happen MANY times ;)
573594
I am very sorry for your loss.  You must be devastated.\n\nIt will be hard to get over and move on right away.  Just take one day at a time.  Grief is very hard because sometimes it can feel as though you are being consumed by it.\n\nMake sure you keep the lines of communication open with any siblings you have.  Also if your dad is in the picture.  he may be hurting too and it may be hard for him to express his loss.\n\nDon't try to replace your mother for your siblings because it isn't your responsibility.  Also realize that you and your mother still have a special relationship even though she has died she is still with you.\n\nWhen my dad died I felt him with me.  Sometimes I know he is there watching over me.  Your mother's love for you will always be there.  Try to remember the good times that you had together and realize that those will never be taken away from you.\n\nDeath is a transitional state and you will be going through a transition to adjust to being without your mother.  Just let the emotions come, if you are sad cry, if you are happy laugh.  In time things will level out and you will be able to face the world.\n\nA counselor once told me that grief is like the waves of the ocean.  Sometimes they come in fast and furious, sometimes the grief is slow and gentle.  It is always there but after awhile the waves are slower and farther between.\n\nMay peace and love be with you and surround you.  I hope that you have the friends and support that you need at this time.  If you need someone to bounce things off of then please feel free to email me.
442553
My advice to people that dream about passed on loved ones is to KEEP ON DREAMING....This is the way people on the other side sometimes communicate with us.... Keep a dream journal and you can get advice from your grandma....