How best to blend a new family with past difficulties?
822723
You need to tell tyour wife that your daughter is a part of you and anything apart of yu is family. If she cant accept that then why did she marry you. You have accepted her family and she needs to accept yours. You dont worry everything will work out in do time you just dont let that new wife keep you from YOUR FLESH IN BLOOD!!!!
1016017
Recognizing the fact that your needs weren't met is a big first step in resolving the problem. Obviously, you can't go back and change history, and unhappily, too many people go through life seeking the love they didn't get as a child. Too often, they accept it from the wrong person, for the wrong reasons. \nYou have identified a problem, now you want to move on to resolving it. First, accept that this is the way things are. There is nothing you can do about that. \nSecond, identify people in your life today who do meet your emotional needs. Are you married? Do you have a loving spouse? Do you have siblings? Any relatives who were influential in your life? Emotional support can be drawn from many sources. \nThe important thing now is to draw a line under the past, and turn your thoughts to the future. Sometimes people who have suffered emotional trauma in their childhood go through life saying, "Poor me," which is terribly unproductive. \nIf you feel overwhelmed by the task of re-aligning your life, think about getting counselling. That's what counsellors are for. It isn't a sign of weakness, but rather a sign of strength that you can recognize the need to get help, and go find it. That's a positive step, and one which may help you towards a full recovery. \nI empathize with your problem and hope you will be successful in resolving it -- because it can be resolved. You still have the rest of your life ahead of you. Don't waste it by letting your emotions become numbed or stifled because of your past. \nGood luck to you.
419360
compromise with your dad, meet someone that is mixed (half white and half black)
616776
Be genuine to them! Don't over show about anything.Be down to earth..Show your belief in the family institution before them.And one more imp thing......try to make them laugh!
1001585
Wow. State Custody may be the best option.\n\nAre there any other family members that will be on the same continent as the mother? I'd suggest they may be good candidates.\n\nWill your sister move to your country?\nYou could all live in the same house and she could earn sweat equity toward rent with you by caring for your home while you work.\n\nShe may just need to let the kids stay with the state until she gets back on her feet -- or should I say on the in the first place!\n\nFoster Parents may be the best option for the kids given all the financial problems, young parents, lack of other immediate family within reasonable proximity!
674833
An honest answer is usually a good thing but not always appreciated it might just be easier and more tactful to tell them that at the time the plans were made it sounded like a good idea  but after some soul searching and consideration you feel that things are different now and it wouldnt work out like planned and you would rather not put any more strain on an already strained relationship. They may not like it very much my parents hated it when I moved out of the town that I grew up in and I kept telling them I would come back.  It took me six years to finally come back after having cut everyone in my family out of my life to have them finally figure out that I dont do things the same way they do and that I am entitled to my life and opinions. After a long time and a lot of relearning in our family we have a great relationship.  There is always hope for the future but you must consider what is best for you and not what is best for them if it is not in keeping with what you want and need. Much easier to tell them now that it wont work out then to move back and have it all fall apart in six months to a year and bring even more division to the family. Good Luck with your choice.
1080957
go down and get some baby power and some food dye the brightest color you can find and turn the powder that color dress in all white the powder your self clothes and hair everything this one color. in a demanding way enter where your mom and new b/f are kissing and say in a firm voice mom I think we need to talk. I am sure she will give you some time to voice your concerns.
152058
If he's been living with you for all these years, i think it's best if you tell him. Hearing you're adopted is tough enough.. hearing it from strangers that are actually your birth parents would be terrible. Tell him, let him know you love him no matter what and tell him if and when he's ready, then he can meet the other parents.
564886
There are several really good search groups, dedicated to reuniting families.  Try:\nSearchingAngels@yahoogroups.com\nAdoptioncafe@yahoogroups.com
1350
First thing I'd suggest is knowing your opponent .. in laymens terms .. ask your girlfriend as much about your parents as you can such as culter attitude and so on .. and past experiences with her last boyfriends that have had the in some cases unfortunante opportunity of meeting them. Once you know what type of people you'll be dealing with you'll be more at ease knowing you can handle what difficulties may come from them.
1035453
Its family, There will always be conflict, thats just the way it is.\nTalk to the person about it. if that doesnt help, then try your parents or an adult you can trust. they will help you solve this problem.
684341
Ok, it won't be ready on Mother's Day, but it WILL matter. Ever heard of scrapbooking? Any of your family around that remembers her younger years? Get an older family member to go through pictures and pull out important ones. Things like her child (ren's) birth, marriage, her parents. Then attach them into a scrapbook and have family members write down things about the pictures. It doesn't have to be big or elaborate, but it would mean a whole lot to her on her lucid days. Just a thought.
156676
find out who grandparents on both sides are. go from there.  how much do you need to know. are you supposed to be getting help?
707635
Dude i couldnt agree with you more.  No offence but for their own good put them in a looney bin and do it fast.  Thisnk about all the things peopl will say about you and your family when they see them.  Is that in itself worth it?
1005100
One parent to another. This is normal. Talk to him reassure him that he is just as special as his little brother/sister. Invite him to help teach his sibling all that he knows(the good habit's of course). Make him more involved in family decisions. Over time you will see a change in his behavior
531181
it is a very very slim one...but if you are willing and ready for the adjustment in your whole life, take a chance but you better be well prepared for that. \n\nit will take a very long period to deal with, i know it from the heart cause i've been there. think of the consequence of the future (children i may say-illness or complications), consideration of each others culture, not only you and your partner but include the closest family as well. the food, the tradition, the language, religion, beliefs, i know there are lots of barriers that needs ironing out. just naming the fews....\n\nit's a great challenge for everyone and if i can move back time, i highly doubt it that i will go for it...
176977
You don't have to do anything.  Just being home with your family will be enough.  As much as you want to be back with them and get back to life at home, they want the same.  Just get home and love them like never before:)  Welcome home!