how do you manage anger?
824851
Beyond reframing the experience, the two anger management programs Lochman has worked on use three techniques to defuse anger once it develops. \n\nDistraction. "If you feel yourself start getting angry and recognize that it's a problem, you focus on something else, such as what you're doing later that day," Lochman says. The classic distraction, counting to 10, actually seems to work.\n\n\n"Self-talk" or "self-instruction" can be repeated silently, carrying a message like, "I'm going to keep cool, I won't let this person get me into trouble." Self-talk can act like a little recording, he adds. "We do role plays, they practice being taunted and teased." \n\n A limited version of relaxation technique. \n\nVR
871201
The only thing you can do is try and control your temper, what you are going through is perfectly normal a bit exaggerated by that is what happens to everyone when angry. You might also want to consider taking blood pressure medications. Consult a doctor for that.
1132725
How about journaling ? To help get out frustrations, irritability and anger or resentment. If not journaling how about walking, punching a punching bag, talking with a counselor at school, trusting a friend or religious leader, reading a self help book ?
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There are several things that you can do. There are anger manangement classes and support groups. There is counseling. There is mediitation. There are hobbies such as karate, yoga and tia chi that help that also.Learn ways to reduce the stress and stress management.\n\nI know because my nickname used to be Taz.
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you may want to seek out an anger management group and pass along the info to your friend. your friend may also benefit from talking to a therapist - clinical social worker, clinical psychologist, etc.
253610
(m)\n\nWe all know what anger is, and we've all felt it: whether as a fleeting annoyance or as full-fledged rage. \n\nAnger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life. And it can make you feel as though you're at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful emotion. This brochure is meant to help you understand and control anger. \n\nWhat is Anger? \n\nThe Nature of Anger \n\nAnger is "an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage," according to Charles Spielberger, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in the study of anger. Like other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes; when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure go up, as do the levels of your energy hormones, adrenaline, and noradrenaline. \n\nAnger can be caused by both external and internal events. You could be angry at a specific person (Such as a coworker or supervisor) or event (a traffic jam, a canceled flight), or your anger could be caused by worrying or brooding about your personal problems. Memories of traumatic or enraging events can also trigger angry feelings. \n\nExpressing Anger \n\nThe instinctive, natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively. Anger is a natural, adaptive response to threats; it inspires powerful, often aggressive, feelings and behaviors, which allow us to fight and to defend ourselves when we are attacked. A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary to our survival. \n\nOn the other hand, we can't physically lash out at every person or object that irritates or annoys us; laws, social norms, and common sense place limits on how far our anger can take us. \n\nPeople use a variety of both conscious and unconscious processes to deal with their angry feelings. The three main approaches are expressing, suppressing, and calming. Expressing your angry feelings in an assertive—not aggressive—manner is the healthiest way to express anger. To do this, you have to learn how to make clear what your needs are, and how to get them met, without hurting others. Being assertive doesn't mean being pushy or demanding; it means being respectful of yourself and others. \n\nAnger can be suppressed, and then converted or redirected. This happens when you hold in your anger, stop thinking about it, and focus on something positive. The aim is to inhibit or suppress your anger and convert it into more constructive behavior. The danger in this type of response is that if it isn't allowed outward expression, your anger can turn inward—on yourself. Anger turned inward may cause hypertension, high blood pressure, or depression. \n\nUnexpressed anger can create other problems. It can lead to pathological expressions of anger, such as passive-aggressive behavior (getting back at people indirectly, without telling them why, rather than confronting them head-on) or a personality that seems perpetually cynical and hostile. People who are constantly putting others down, criticizing everything, and making cynical comments haven't learned how to constructively express their anger. Not surprisingly, they aren't likely to have many successful relationships. \n\nFinally, you can calm down inside. This means not just controlling your outward behavior, but also controlling your internal responses, taking steps to lower your heart rate, calm yourself down, and let the feelings subside. \n\nAs Dr. Spielberger notes, "when none of these three techniques work, that's when someone—or something—is going to get hurt." \n\nAnger Management \n\nThe goal of anger management is to reduce both your emotional feelings and the physiological arousal that anger causes. You can't get rid of, or avoid, the things or the people that enrage you, nor can you
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You need to let what's on the inside come out.  In other words, you need to vent this pent up frustration/emotion otherwise it will eat away at you until it eventually will vent of its own accord when you least want it to (i.e. you will snap at someone, or will break down in tears, etc).\nA good way to vent frustration is to do some physical exercise, like visit a gym.  Or failing that, just beat seven shades of sh*t out of your pillow, that might help!
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Well, it's hard to say -- I'm a Anger/Rage Councelor and grew up with Anger/Rage issues and in a home with the same issues so I completely understand -- So it depends on the degree of the anger -- Is it anger or is it a rage? -- People always tell you that anger is wrong -- First of all it's not wrong, it's self defense -- Anger is not evil and it's alright to be angry -- It's what you do with the anger that creates the problems -- When a person is in full blown rage that rage has to be directed somewhere to begin with until it's learned response to control, which will come in time and with age -- I used to go and beat the heak out of pine trees (I hate pine trees) until I come down off the rage high -- And anger/rage does produce and give a high -- And those harmones have to be directed and dealt with -- Just having someone telling you to get over it only makes it worse (always made me worse because I had every right feeling the way I did) -- Then I learned how to identify the factors that would uncontiously lead me to those fits of anger -- I didn't know it at the time, and would have sworn nothing was causing it, but there was -- Frustration from other areas of my life caused it -- Not feeling in control of other areas of my life or things happening to me or to my family or in my family -- Things I couldn't control and things I'd never be able to control -- All I could control was my actions and reactions to things around me -- I could go on and on -- But I would suggest to get a book called "The Anger Workbook" and it will help you start identifing your anger stressers -- And if you would like to talk further you can contact me for free at theangelknight.com -- I have 25 years of counceling experience and a Bachelors Degree plus I'm a State approved Therapeutic Foster Parent -- Helping those with Anger/Rage issues is what I do -- Hope this helps -- Good Luck and Take Care --
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disassociate yourself from the thing that is causing you to be angry with this person. you are not doing yourself any good by being angry, especially if the other person does not care with the emotion your having.
698651
deal with your anger issues
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Long hot showers, meditation, exercise, screaming into my pillow, just about anything. I have a lot of trouble with patience too. If there are certain people that drive you crazy the first thing is to remember your being upset doesn't do anything to them. Sometimes you just have to let go of things. (Easier said than done!!)\n\nI also find it helpful to talk with someone. Let someone else know how you are feeling. Talk about what is stressing you out. Chances are someone else has gone through a similar event. While they may not be able to help you now, knowing that they survived will help relieve some of your stress.
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The first thing is, you need to recognize the problem which you have. \n\nI used to struggle with that too. I had a lot that went on in my life that was no good. I talked to a counselor and told him that I am an angry person. He told me that I am a good person, but I need to get my anger under control\n\nHe told me to remember that we choose our emotions whether we know it or not. He said that there is no point in getting angry over something that we have no control of and it is especially important that we don't not lash out at our loved ones. \n\nMaybe you should try counseling for a while. \nI feel for you and I think it's awesome that you are willing to admit that you have a temper problem. A lot people don't have the guts to do that. THey think that everyone else is the problem
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Violence - Get a punching bag & beat the crap out of it. It will help relieve the anger and hate for a while. Hit the gym hard, work out your emotional pain physically. You will be too tired to be bitter. \n\nRemember the beautiful things in life and go visit scenery that makes you happy. Be with people who make you happy-friends,family \n\nhope it works out.\n\nMy bitterness & hate is only for one person- my ex. Those things help me for a bit.
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Anger management classes....;
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Talk with her.  You need to get counseling for anger management.  If she is willing to stay with you then let her know whats going on, she may need to join you at some point.  If not, you still need to get counseling for yourself and for any future relationships.
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We all at times would like to get revenge so we feel better. The best thing to do is really wait and don't act while your angry , sit it out and let it go for awhile and see if that feeling doesn't just fade away..
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i try to avoid anger, it's a counterproductive emotion and i almost never display it.  for me, frustration is much more common.\n\nbut for the sake of your question, i would rather be angry at myself than at you.  if i did something stupid enough to earn that self-inflicted anger, i'd have no one else to blame.  i'd try and figure out why i did what i did, and how it could be made up, to me or to others.  i must answer to myself every time i look in the mirror, and if anger is my response, well then i must have done something stupid to warrant it.  and i know i can find it in me to forgive myself. :)\n\nif i'm angry with YOU, it's likely going to be accompanied by a fair bit of frustration as well.  and since YOU earned my wrath (i'm not really scary at all, don't worry!) i'd feel upset; i think of myself as a very level-headed person.  what could you possibly do to get me to be that way?  and how can i turn the anger into something else?  this is much worse than being angry with myself, and far less predictable.  not a fan.  eventually, i'll ALWAYS forgive... but in the meantime... GRRR!!!