Genie again - 2 jokes?
814412
arey bhaiya! keep rocking ;p
401796
A bear is chasing a rabbit through the magic forest when they run into the genie frog!\nThe frog says that he'll grant them each three wishes.\nThe bear says "I wish all the bears, besides me, in this forest are female". The frog says it will be done.\nThe rabbit wishes for a motorbike and gets it immediately.\n"For my second wish", says the bear, "I would like all the bears, besides me, in all the neighbouring forests to be female" \nThe rabbit wishes for a helmet. The bear gives the rabbit a dirty look and says that he has wasted two wishes that he could of had for himself.\n"For my final wish", continues the bear, "I wish all the bears, besides me, in the world are female". The frog grants him his wish.\nThe rabbit then jumps on his bike, puts on his helmet and just before he speeds off wishes "I wish that the bear was gay!"
419762
Two men were drinking in a bar when one looks at the other and asks,\n“What are u drinking?”\nThe second one looks at him and says\n“Magic Beer”\nThe first guy exclaims, “Magic Beer?!?” The second guy says:\n“Yup, I can prove it by jumping off that cliff over there and flying right back up.”\n“Yea right,” Says the first guy. The second guy jumps off and comes back up perfectly unharmed. “Do it again.” The first guy said, and the second guy did it again.\n“Well, Im drunk enough to try.” He said. The first guy takes a sip of the Magic Beer and jumps off and falls to his death. The bartender just looks at the second guy and says:\n”You know, you can be real mean when your drunk Superman.”
1085935
Send 2 to the Jokes&Riddles group and they will do them in for you.  The other three are yours...
917427
Excellent - great sense of humour:      \n\nPaddy made a mistake and took a viagra tablet instead of a sleeping tablet.   He went to bed to have forty winks but ended up having forty w...............................
888279
two points very good (joke)
910889
OMG this joke is one of my favorites!!! Got any more?
322020
Here's some jokes about him.
1136709
I have humor, why I will even tell you a joke.  What does a women say to a man with two black eyes?  Nothing, she already told him twice.  Now thats funny, I don't care who you are...LOL
101562
There is a what???? before whooooo??????\n\nReminds me of a joke I heard once.\n\nSo this guy walks into a bar and says..................OUCH!! I just walked into a bar.
796367
A great joke!\n\nIt made my night.\n\nI like the bible verse you quoted; Proverbs 17:22.\n\nI'll look again for future jokes.
923847
LMFAO great jokes!!! Love your sense of humor it is wonderful!!
543197
Thats a good one!!! A cute clean joke!!!! Keep em coming!!!
731922
1)Theres a blonde and a brunette walking in the park. The brunette says to the blonde "look, a dead bird". The blonde looks up into the air and says "where?"\n\n2)Theres this blonde woman driving her car down the road and all of a sudden starts swerving. A police car behind her notices this and pulls her over. The blonde says "thank god your here officer, these trees keep appearing in the middle of the road and i have to swerve to avoid them." The officer replies "thats your air-freshener."\n\n3)Why shouldnt you let a blonde use your computer? You'll end up with tipex all over the screen. (cos shes usin the word processor, inevitably makes a mistake and tries to tipex it out) [do americans have tipex?]
1167574
Another guy, who met this same genie, walks into the bar.  Riding on his shoulders is a guy who is only about a foot tall.  The first thing the little guy does is make fun of the guy with the small head.  Then he insults all the other patrons.  Then he orders a  beer from the bartender, shouting, "C'mon, Moron!  Does it take you all day to sling a simple glass of suds?  What an idiot."  \n\nWell, the little guy, even after he gets his beer, continues to mutter abuse and profanities under his breath.  Meanwhile, the guy whose shoulder the little guy is sitting on starts taking with and comparing notes with the man with the small head.  After Tiny Head tells his story, he asks the other guy what he had wished for.\n\n"Me?" He points to the one foot tall guy on his shoulder who is still muttering rude remarks, "I told the genie I wanted a twelve inch prick."
267826
2.\n\nAn Irish man walks into a pub. The bartender asks him, "what'll you have?"\nThe man says, "Give me three pints of Guinness please."\nSo the bartender brings him three pints and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third until they're gone. He then orders three more.\nThe bartender says, "Sir, I know you like them cold. You don't have to order three at a time. I can keep an eye on it and when you get low I'll bring you a fresh cold one."\nThe man says, "You don't understand. I have two brothers, one in Australia and one in the States. We made a vow to each other that every Saturday night we'd still drink together. So right now, my brothers have three Guinness Stouts too, and we're drinking together.\nThe bartender thought that was a wonderful tradition.\nEvery week the man came in and ordered three beers. Then one week he came in and ordered only two. He drank them and then ordered two more.\nThe bartender said to him, "I know what your tradition is, and I'd just like to say that I'm sorry that one of your brothers died."\nThe man said, "Oh, me brothers are fine----I just quit drinking."\n\n guys, 1 Irish, 1 English and 1 Scotch, are walking along the beach one day and come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.\n"I give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total", says the Genie.\nThe Irish guy says, "I am a fisherman, my Dad's a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity."\nSo, with a blink of the Genie's eye "AlKaZoom" the oceans were teaming with fish.\nThe English guy was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that nothing will get in for all eternity. \nAgain, with a blink of the Genie's eye "AlkaZoom - POOF" there was a huge wall around England. The Scot asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall."\nThe Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out." \nThe Scot says, "Ach, fill it up with water."\n\n\nWhat do you call a Scots woman with one leg? \nEileen.\n\n\nAn Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were standing looking at a prize cow in a field.\nThe Englishman says "Look at that fine English cow."\nThe Irishman disagreed, saying "No, it's an Irish cow."\nThe Scotsman thought for a moment and then clinched the argument. "No, it's a Scottish cow - it's got bagpipes underneath!"\n\n\nJock decided to call his father-in-law the "Exorcist" cuz every time he came to visit he made the spirits disappear!\n\n\nHow do you get a Highlander onto the roof?\nTell him the drinks are on the house.\n\n\nNowadays the Scots do not play bagpipes to frighten their enemies, they do it to annoy their neighbours.\n\n\n\nA Guy walks into a bar with an octopus. He sits the octopus on a stool and announces that this is a very talented octopus, which can play any musical instrument in the world.\nEveryone laughs at the man, calling him an idiot. So he says that he'll wager £50 to anyone who has an instrument that the octopus can’t play.\nA guy walks up with a guitar and puts it beside the octopus. Immediately the octopus picks up the guitar and starts playing better than Eric Clapton. The guitar man pays up his £50.\nAnother guy comes up with a trumpet. This time the octopus plays like Miles Davis.\nThis guy pays his £50. \nThen a Scotsman hands over a set of bagpipes. The octopus fumbles with it for a minute and then sits down with a confused look.\n"Ha," the Scot says. "Can ye no play it?" The Octopus looks at him and says: "Play it? I’m going to make love to it as soon as I figure out how to get these pyjamas off..."\n\n\nWhat do
108947
I have two: I love the second one.\nJoke #1\nA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"\n\nIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."\n\nOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"\n\nThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."\n-----------\n Joke #2\nTwo women are new arrivals at the pearly gates and are\n comparing stories on how they died.\n\n 1st woman: I froze to death.\n\n 2nd woman: How horrible!\n\n 1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the\n cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a\n peaceful death. What about you?\n\n 2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected\n that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to\n catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by\n himself in the den watching TV.\n\n 1st woman: So what happened?\n\n 2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there\n somewhere that I started running all over the house\n looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down\n into the basement. Then I went through every closet and\n checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had\n looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that\n I just keeled over with a heart attack and died!\n\n 1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer. We'd\n both still be alive.