Easy points here! I need a few more good jokes! I rate and encourage to rate answers, details inside...?
831752
For decades, two heroic statues, one male and one female, faced each other in a city park, until one day an angel came down from heaven.\n\n"You've been such exemplary statues," he announced to them, "That I'm going to give you a special gift. I'm going to bring you both to life for thirty minutes, in which you can do anything you want." And with a clap of his hands, the angel brought the statues to life.\n\nThe two approached each other a bit shyly, but soon dashed for the bushes, from which shortly emerged a good deal of giggling, laughter, and shaking of branches. Fifteen minutes later, the two statues emerged from the bushes, wide grins on their faces.\n\n"You still have fifteen more minutes," said the angel, winking at them.\n\nGrinning even more widely the female statue turned to the male statue and said, "Great! Only this time you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on it's head."
933739
OMG too funny....Thank You for the laugh.\n\nHave A Great Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1147119
Jokes for atheists?... maybe we can have some laugh atleast with jesus ****
1078036
Joann, keep them a coming, I enjoy these jokes your sending us. I will be passing them along. LOLOLOL *~* lololol
850352
very funny lol ^_^\n\npoor dog\n\nthanks for sharing it
923847
LMFAO great jokes!!! Love your sense of humor it is wonderful!!
766571
lol, it was a very cheesey joke. . .but i laughed anyway lol, ive had a really bad day >_< i need jokes brign them on!! please??
849770
Giggle (small one). I've heard it before but we need more clean jokes like that :)
1048985
Hey, I like this one. You're the first person who made me laugh today. Thanks, I needed a good laugh. But, I have been in other categories of serious topics today, so I needed a cheer up!
543197
Thats a good one!!! A cute clean joke!!!! Keep em coming!!!
1169207
dirty but funny:\n\nThere was this businessman who was getting ready to go on a long business trip. He knew his wife was a flirtatious sort, so he thought he'd try to get her something to keep her occupied while he was gone, because he didn't much like the idea of her screwing someone else. So he went to a store that sold sex toys and started looking around. He thought about a life-sized sex doll, but that was too close to another man for him.\n\nHe was browsing through the dildos, looking for something special to please his wife, and started talking to the old man behind the counter. He explained his situation. The old man said, "Well, I don't really know of anything that will do the trick. We have vibrating dildos, special attachments, and so on, but I don't know of anything that will keep her occupied for weeks, except -- " and he stopped.\n\n"Except what?" the man asked.\n\n"Nothing, nothing."\n\n"C'mon, tell me! I need something!"\n\n"Well, sir, I don't usually mention this, but there is the 'voodoo dick.'"\n\n"So what's up with this voodoo dick?" he asked.\n\nThe old man reached under the counter, and pulled out an old wooden box, carved with strange symbols. He opened it, and there lay a very ordinary-looking dildo. The businessman laughed, and said "Big fucking deal. It looks like every other dildo in this shop!"\n\nThe old man replied, "But you haven't seen what it'll do yet." He pointed to a door and said "Voodoo dick, the door." The voodoo dick rose out of its box, darted over to the door, and started screwing the keyhole. The whole door shook with the vibrations, and a crack developed down the middle. Before the door could split, the old man said "Voodoo dick, get back in your box!" The voodoo dick stopped, floated back to the box and lay there, quiescent once more.\n\n"I'll take it!" said the businessman.\n\nThe old man resisted, saying it wasn't for sale, but he finally surrendered to $700 in cash. The guy took it home to his wife, told her it was a special dildo and that to use it, all she had to do was say "Voodoo dick, my pussy." He left for his trip satisfied that things would be fine while he was gone.\n\nAfter he'd been gone a few days, the wife was unbearably horny. She thought of several people who would willingly satisfy her, but then she remembered the voodoo dick. She got it out, and said "Voodoo dick, my pussy!" The voodoo dick shot to her crotch and started pumping. It was great, like nothing she'd ever experienced before. After three orgasms, she decided she'd had enough, and tried to pull it out, but it was stuck in her, still thrusting. She tried and tried to get it out, but nothing worked. Her husband had forgot to tell her how to shut it off. So she decided to go to the hospital to see if they could help. She put her clothes on, got in the car and started to drive to the hospital, quivering with every thrust of the dildo. On the way, another orgasm nearly made her swerve off the road, and she was pulled over by a policeman. He asked for her license, and then asked how much she'd had to drink.\n\nGasping and twitching, she explained that she hadn't been drinking, but that a voodoo dick was stuck in her pussy, and wouldn't stop screwing. The officer looked at her for a second, and then said "Yea, right. Voodoo dick, my ass!"
1015843
Strange but Quite Hilarious!!! Good Joke!!! Rating-9/10!!! Continue posting some other jokes!!!
371616
if i made u laugh, would u please give me ten points???\nbecoz i never had 10 pts. in my life ever!!!\npromiz...\n\nseller: can i help u sir?\nman: my wife needs bra but i dont know the size.\nseller: touch my breast sir and try to estimate.\nman: oh, i 4got she needs underwear too!!!\nhahaha....
431962
A nice REFRESHING joke. LOL
558893
Joke: If your uncle jack was on a roof - would you help your uncle jack off??? My girl has cought me many times - It turned her on and we ended up making passionate love!! I thought that was very cool!!!
834192
OMG .................. excellent and really well thought out ..... LOL\nThanks for sharing once again and hope you post more jokes
785936
Oh sh*t, you've got some good ones.  Thanks!  You're a 10 in the joke department.