What does it mean when your husband doesn't have sex with you but spends every morning viewing porn ?
825076
You need to talk to him about this. The key to a good relationship is COMMUNICATION!\n\nYou need to tell him this has got to stop, or you will need to move on from him. You MUST tell him how you feel, and you have to both come to a conclusion on what to do. \n\nDon't lsiten to the people who will answer and tell you to get rid of him. You need to talk about this with him, and maybe get couples therapy. Perhaps he is even depressed?  \n\n- Hope this helps
391475
he shouldnt have to.  Watching porn is nothing to get upset about, who is he sleeping with every night?  those girls arent real and most guys know that.  Stop making him feel guilty!
1160291
When a man doesn't want to have sex with a wife who wants to have sex - there is definitely something wrong.  It is symptomatic of anger,of deep resentment, of an affair or of other sexual addiction.\n\nGet counselling.  And don't have kids until this thing is all figured out.
445557
First, you must believe that it is not about "you".  It is about him.  His pornography and masturbation have led him to compulsion and addictive behavior.  Pornography can destroy a person's ability to "make love". Some men try to tell their wives that the pornography is "priming" for a conclusion with them, but it is the priming that draws them back again and again, not the conclusion.  Some men say "all guys do it".  No they do not.  Especially when it gets to the point of addiction, and it is effecting the "real" relationship. I have always thought that if you have to hide what you are doing, then you must think it is wrong, or you feel guilty about doing it.  I think you have to treat it like any addiction, and get professional help.  First, the person has to admit there is a problem, and be willing to accept outside help.  Stop blaming yourself, and thinking you are not attractive and don't satisfy him.  It is not about you, it is about his "addiction".
787946
You can approach this with the knowledge that he is probably not cheating as porn fills that need to go outside the home. Guys are hardwired to have multiple partners and often porn fills that need. \nThe other over riding truth is men have the ability to view women in porn very differently than they view their wives. You , as wife, are the bastion of decency and honor not some cheap hussy who would appear on video. Therefore the women in film are in no way a comparison to you. Nor do we want them to be.  They are tawdry lust, you are our wives. Whether this makes you feel any better may be debatable. \nI think that, in a quiet moment , you explain what you discovered.\nTell him it disturbed you more than you thought it would, just as you did here.  Talk about your feelings instead of what he did which take the accusations out of the loop.\nIf you have not perceived some lack of affection or loss of sexual contact you can rest that it is not about you. The women there are detached objects which do things we would not request from our wives. They don't say no. They always make noise. They don't require affection. Consideration for them is not an issue. Unless he is hung like the proverbial horse the guys are not like him either.\nAsk him if there is something they do that he is missing with you.\nApart from frequency I'll bet he does not name much.\n\nGood Luck\n\nWomen view sex as a statement of intimacy. Men view sex with their wives like that sometimes. There are times when it is about release, plain and simple. It is release without dealing with any requirement to consider the feelings of anyone except themselves. There is a component which says just do it and requires no effort. I'll wager ther are few wives who would deal with the amount of sexual encounters required to totally deal with that because what goes with that is Wham Bam Thank You Mamm.  So unless its affecting your time together it is not about you. \nBTW the addiction thing is wrong too.
733953
All men are visual creatures.  Most men like to look at the female body, we find it attractive.  We do not have sex with a woman based on the way we "feel" about her, it's about the way she looks.  Just because your husband is getting the visual stimulation from watching porn, it doesn't mean that he isn't attracted to you.  He propbaly lied to you about the porn because you admitted to watching it "to make him feel okay" and he believes that you dissaprove of it and he doesn't want to offend you.  So, if you are truly okay with it, let it ride.  If not, he'll keep hiding it.  Nevertheless, boys will be boys, don't let it get to you.
6852
Hun, i know what you are going through, I have been there done that and get this, i am not even married....my fiancee and i have been living together for almost a year now, engaged for almost 2 and yes, the sex drive has gone from 100 to 0...for him, not for me, it's still strong as ever. when i asked he always told me he was tired or just wanted to cuddle or something like that, so yeah, i know how you feel. i am sad to report however that he was hiding something from me....his addiction to porn....he'd rather look at pics and vids than be with me...pretty low huh? well anyways, we are still together and trying to work through the issues and yes things are looking up....so just hang in there and hopefully things will start to get better!
1108969
i dont think it is the porn that you are upset about, i think that it is the fact that he kept it from you. Explain to him that he doesnt need to keep anything from you no matter what it is. You will support him and stick by him that is why you married him.
106661
Sounds like your husband has issues about his ex, not about porn.  You might want to question his wanting pictures of an ex when he's married to you.  Why doesn't he have naked pictures of you?  If you don't care that he looks at porn tell him to get rid of the pictures of his ex and take pictures of you.  No, you're not being sensitive about it.  If I had naked pictures of my ex, my wife would cut me off from sex, stop talking to me until I could explain it to her in terms that would make sense to her as to why I have them.  Oh, and he's not mad at you for not understanding he's mad at you because he got caught.
519494
I had that problem with my ex-hubby I caught him constantly spanking the monkey online, calling 900 numbers It is an addiction just like drugs or alchol except they are addicted to the fantasy that the porn and other things gives to them. The problem lies with him not you. Blame him not you and if this is how he really is trust me you are better off by yourself.
1044802
Some men may feel their love life with their spouse is inadequate and therefore masturbate to porn to achieve sexual satisfaction. Or perhaps, they just want to get ideas to spice up their sex life.\nI think porn is good so long as it doesn't take control of the relationship like "Want to have sex?" "No, I would rather look at porn".
1003234
Any husband that would say that to their wife should not be married.  Porn is an addiction just like anything else.  The both of you need to go to therapy together and fix this problem.  Verbal abuse is just as bad as the physical.  Don't let his problem get you down.  Either seek professional help to fix this or move on.  There is a man out there that will love you no matter what.  Those are the ones to hold on to.
481580
I wouldn't like it to be honest. I'm not against porn, but I would be very upset if my husband was turned on by other chicks, especially if he went to a strip joint. I only agree to porn and stuff if they just look, but don't get turned on by that person. I am happy to look at porn together. Your wife needs to show you some respect! I would never do that to my husband. I wouldn't even get the urge to do something like that. Not if I'm in love.
1042710
Maybe he freaked out because he's not emotionally attached to you.  And you are bringing the emotional equation into the "casual sex" relationship.  He clearly doesn't want to be emotionally attached to you, because you are simply the "sex" he's not getting at home.\n\nHe will never leave his wife.  \n\nWhat are you doing?  What would your husband say?\n\nRelationships are not kleenex, you don't toss them out when things get soggy.  There are real emotions and people involved here.  How can you lie to your husband every day that you keep this secret from him.\n\nLike it or not.  He's pulling away because of the "emotional" attachment you are bringing to the "sex only" relationship.\n\nHe has a relationship, and that's at home.  He only wants sex from you.  As long as you give it, he will take it.\n\nAnd that's a Man, in a nutshell.
1151313
Be very worried. My ex husband watches porn. He did the whole time we were married. He ended up cheating on me pretty much the whole 20 years we were together. I believe that him watching so much porn had a lot to do with it. I am sure that his attitudes about sex, it being his right to cheat on 'his woman', etc also havd a lot to do with it as well.\n\nI would personally be very concerned/worried if your partner is watching porn 3 or 4 times a day. They are, eventually, not going to be satisfied with just watching it on tv. They are going to go outside of the relationship to get what they are seeing. \n\nI would suggest counseling for your partner. Also tell your partner how much it bothers you, worries you, etc. Watching porn is dangerous for a relationship UNLESS both parties are watching it together to learn tips or to get aroused, but only once in awhile, NOT all the time.
915831
I suggest marriage counseling. Your husband sounds like an immature 20 something that should not be married. Having a three-some is  one of the BIGGEST relationship killers and definitely does not belong in a marriage if one partner is not completely open to it. He sounds like because he is not getting his way he is punishing you the only way he knows how.\nSex is supposed to play an important role in committed relationships because of the intimacy level. Sex is supposed to be something beautiful that two people who love each other share.... not something to invite others to participate in. (I feel there is a time and place for experimentation, however a marriage USUALLY isn't one of those places).\nI think his porn addiction is also a bit of a problem and he could be using a threesome as a way to deflect your attention from his real problem...his addiction to porn.\nIn my opinion, if you think your sex life is as big of a problem as it seems to me, and you want to work on your marriage, I think seeing a sex therapist with your husband (or at the very least a marriage counselor) would be your best course.\n\nDONT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER!!!!
826608
Honesty is the BEST policy...\n\nTalk to him about what's bothering you...otherwise...what is he suppose to do? He can't read your mind. \n\nMy husband works his butt off too and comes home, showers, eats and sleeps...gets up the next day, goes to work, comes home, showers, eats and sleeps...and so on.\n\nI feel the same way you do at times, but we need to understand, (which we both do) that he is tired and drained.  This does NOT interpret that he does not love you or find you unattractive...he's just tired.\n\nTry scheduling something for you and him on his day(s) off something special to do...don't wait for him...just do it.\n\nPray for courage and uplifting...\nTry to get some sleep... :)