My husband always seems to yell at me after he visits with his family.  I can't take it any more.?
824434
Yells at you MORE when hes with his family? Why is he yelling at you EVER??? This is totally disrespectful and you should not stand for it. You need to implement a "No YELLING" rule, none is allowed in the house. If he ever starts yelling, just turn and leave the room, leave the house if you have to. He will learn that it does not accomplish anything to yell. He is teaching your child bad things, and this should not be allowed. You need to come up with a better way to communicate. Counseling can help here if you don't feel you know any strategies to improve communication.
123875
You and your husband need to talk about the situation, and your mother in law (and/or father in law as well) should be brought into the conversation later, since they are taking part in the wife bashing. If your husband doesn't stop allowing the wife bashing then you need to consider some therapy - he needs to get that you are his wife and his mom should not be beating up on you, and if she does he needs to put a stop to it.  She's entitled to her opinion, but she doesn't need to voice it.
934944
Send him a letter? Dont you dare. He should always back you up - you are the one he is married to. I think you need to find alternate arrangements for babysitting. Quietly, with dignity, make other arrangements. If the grandma and aunty are not respecting your wishes, what makes you think they wont be disrespecting you infront of your kids? Try to put some distance between you and his family, so you and your husband can form your own tight knit unit. Then when you want to, you can see them on your terms. As dr phil says you teach people how to treat you - dont put up with it. Demand a higher standard of behaviour from them.
429636
This is actually pretty serious, and is probably indicative of other areas where he is weak or immature.  I guess part of "how serious" depends on how long you two have been dating and how serious you two are as a couple.  If you are thinking about marrying him, think twice.\n\nMy husband's family doesn't berate me in any way, but his mom is *very* controlling and over-bearing, and he DOES NOT stand up to her, and it puts a strain on our relationship.  You are not just marrying him, you are marrying his family.  \n\nI can also tell you from experience that my husband also seems to have problems in general with having BALLS...(sorry).  It's frustrating because I think he lets too many people (including me, at times) push him around.  \n\nIf it's bothering you now, it's only going to get worse.  Think long...(and I do mean LONG)...and hard about whether or not this is the kind of man you want to marry.  Someone who can't (or won't) stand tall and be a "man."
833136
I am. It's because his mother comes first, then the kids, then me. He says terrible things to me that hurt my feelings and isn't sorry. We've been through marriage counseling twice. His mother interferes in our marriage and if I say anything, he gets defensive. He tells her, then she gets mad. She's trying to turn him against me.
367825
I've been married for 3 years now, and let me tell you it has been hard at times.  My husband is very very compulsive about cleaning.  I however am the opposite.  He will come home from work and nag and complain NON STOP about everything about the house. When I do the dishes, he'll come in and yell at me because I'm not drying the right way, or I'm not stacking the right way.  We really had our breaking point when at 530am he was getting ready for work, and he took down the curtains because he wanted me to get a start on cleaning and making him breakfast.  Now I work full time too, and my alarm was set for 7am.  We had the biggest fight. I finally told him I couldn't take it anymore, he was bringing me down so much that I was starting to hate my self.  Just saying that too him killed him.  He had no idea that I was so unhappy.  After getting so much out he now makes an effort to make me feel better, he makes me breakfast in bed every Saturday.  And when he gets ready to complain or nag he holds back and simply offers the advice "take it or leave it"
961192
Tell your husband either he says something or you will. You're an adult and don't need anyone telling you what to do. And if you're the one to say something, his mother is not going to like what you have to say. You're tired of this crap and will put a stop to it.
176088
FIRST OF ALL YOU NEED TO PARAY TO GOD TO GIVE YOU STRENGTH TO BE ABLE TO KNOCK THE H*** OUT OF THEM IF THEY GET IN YOUR FACE AGAIN, BECAUSE IT IS NOT UNFAIR OF YOU SO DO NOT THINK THAT WAY. YOU SHOULD TELL THEM HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT THEM AND MAKE NO QUALMS ABOUT IT. THEY SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN YOUR DEFENSE WHEN YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND HAD THAT ARUGUMENT AND HE WAS DISRESPECTING YOU, INSTEAD THEY USED IT FOR THEIR TIME TO VENT HOW THEY FELT ABOUT YOU. YOU NEED TO SIT DOWN AND TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND ABOUT THIS ISSUE, AND LET HIM KNOW HOW  YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS. DO NOT DEPEND ON YOUR HUSBAND TO SHIELD YOU FROM THEM, BECAUSE IT SEEMS THAT IS IS DEFINETLY SLACKING IN THAT DEPARTMENT. YOU BETTER LET THEM KNOW WHERE TO GET THE HECK OFF AT, AND THE NEGATIVITY THAT THEY HAVE TOWARDS YOU IS MUTUAL (EVEN IF IT IS NOT THEY DONT HAVE TO KNOW THAT), BECAUSE YOU HAVENT DID ANYTHING TO DESERVE TO BE TREATED LIKE THAT. \nFURTHERMORE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO DEAL WITH THEM THOSE ARE YOUR HUSBAND'S PARENTS NOT YOURS, DO NO FEEL THAT JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED TO THEIR SON THAT YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THEM. TO MAKE THINGS EASIER FOR YOU DO GOT TO THEIR HOUSE, AND DO NOT LET THEM COME TO YOUR, IF YOUR HUSBAND WANT TO SEE THEM THEN HE CAN GOT OVER THERE.  \nYOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE "UNDERSTANDING" ABOUT A D*** THING, AND YOUNEED TO TELL YOUR HUSBAND THAT YOU ARE NOT GOING TO KISS THEIR A**** JUST TO GET ALONG WITH THEM, AND IF HE DONT WATCH THEN HE WILL BE BACK AT HOME WITH HIS MOM AND DAD.  YOU ARE A WOMAN IN YOUR OWN RIGHT, AND YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THEIR CRAP. I HOPE THIS HELPS!!!
261694
it doesn't sound to good, he sounds like he's a nightmare to live with. my advice is leave him before you get hurt anymore.
841231
I am sorry girl but it was disrespectful.  I dont blame him for getting mad...you made him look like an ass infront of his whole family.  Now they think that you are a bad person and if you love him you will have to prove yourself to him.  If not find another man.
246861
your husband sounds like a loser\ni think you need to leave him for someone who will come home to you
308103
Just stop and think of all the good things your husband has done and the reasoning behind you marrying him! Change the subject every time you find your self getting ready to nag! I nag alot too but I just have to stop and think can I do anything about the situation, then I try and do it! As long as you know you are doing it at least this is the first step into getting better, You can do it just slow down and think before you speak! Also know there's a time to be quiet and a time to speak out loud! Certain things that really get you mad just talk to him about them and see if he can help you with any of them, others just try and do whatever it is your self! Good Luck and God Bless!
566300
I find everything about my husband's boyfriend annoying
606397
there is such a thing as verbal abuse sounds like that's what you're getting from him.tell him straight up help or get out.
669856
Let him know how you feel.  The older I get, the more I b-itch. Everything from our government's corruption to the screwin' the American Oil Cartel is giving us.\n\nFrom the idiots that can't answer questions but CAN forward your calls to a voicemail to the kids at McDonalds who actually have the nerve to ask what you'd like to order, then stuff whatever THEY WANT to, in your bag.\n\nThere's a lot to whine about these days and I, like your husband, find it tough to converse about anything but this stuff! \n\nGo easy on the old guy ( I am guessing old, because I am).\n\nEveryone outside of your home is trying to kick his hardworkin' posterior.
745508
follow your heart but communcate that with your husband...and for god sake stop worrying about this stuff and consummate the marriage..its been long enough and im sure hes irritated.
749833
If it really bothers you that much that you are family is bothering your in laws, then call them up. Find out what they want and tell them to stop contacting you through them. There are better ways of communications in future. If anything tell them to try your email that way you have control of their contact and they certainly wont bother your in laws.