Do you think it's rude and/or presumptuous for a bride-to-be to ask for very expensive china?
828632
yes it is..you learn the longer your married the less it matters
1024071
On a date, I go for the rule of whoever asked the person out should pay.  So if I do the asking I treat.  If he does the asking he treats.  \n\nI think many couples planning on getting married share the expenses of the wedding, although traditionally I think it's the bride's parents who pay.\n\nSome men like to pay for women, it makes them feel gallant or gentlemanly, which is fine sometimes, but I have to say I like to pay, at least for myself if not also for him sometimes, because I don't want to get too dependent on him!
719704
well, in my culture, there is a tradition that a groom should buy the bride when he comes to pick her up before the wedding.  And there is always a small girl who is dressed like a bride.  At some point the bride's friends bring her out telling the groom that whatever he has given is enough for a small bride... So he has to give more :)\nI am not sure you meant this...
341801
In China, white is for funerals.  Red is the color for weddings because weddings are happy.  Jewelry is a good gift.  Don't give her a knife.  It implies that you want to cut the relationship off.  Also, don't give her a clock because to "give a clock" sound like to send somebody to their grave.  Do not give shoes, because the word for "shoes" and "evil" sounds the same in Chinese.\n\nYou would not be amiss to give a red envelope, with money in it (make sure the amount is an even number, but never anything with the number 4, because that means death).  There may be a ceremony during the banquet where she serves you tea and calls you Pa (or Ma).  You return with the red envelope.  (If your son's other parent is attending, they will also need a red envelope, for the same ceremony.)\n\nSometimes there are local customs, often to bring them luck to have children.  For example, foods that pun on the Chinese word "sheng" which means to give birth.  People in different regions do this in different ways.  You might want to ask your son.
840838
I don't see anything wrong with it. She was upfront about what she  was going to do with the money.\n\nIf her fans wanted to show their appreciation, so be it.\n\nNobody was ripped off or deceived here.
1039186
That is really awful! Wow. I have only heard of such inconsiderateness once before. \n\nMy cousin got married maybe 15 years ago and my fiance wasnt allowed to go either. I was supposed to be in her wedding but I declined. I went to the ceremony, stayed for dinner and then had my fiance pick me up. I couldnt believe how rude that was of her! And my fiance and I were living together at the time, too!\n\nAll I can tell you is that you should really ask for an exception to be made. Tell them how much it would mean to you to have your boyfriend there. After all, some people never get married and are happily together forever. So, I dont think that the piece of paper (or ring in the case of being engaged) should have any bearing on whether your boyfriend is invited. \n\nYou could offer to pay for his dinner, if money is what they are concerned about. \n\nI would have done the same thing that you did. It is so highly rude and unjustified for your boyfriend to not have been invited. I cant believe the nerve of some people. It makes me so angry just thinking about them doing that to you! Ugh! I would have declined the invitation also. If nothing else, it's out of respect for your boyfriend! \n\nBottom line is, do what you feel is right. You will get a whole myriad of answers here covering all options. Only you know what's right for you. But once you have made up your mind, stand firm! Dont let other family members tell you that you are wrong. You are not the one who was wrong here!
1157562
Uh, well, I find brides annoying period, no metter the wedding budget.\n\nYuck, they are nasty self centered Beotches
1154414
It is rude ... usually people just ask "is there anything I can bring..." when they get invited and even then a good host should not ask them to bring anything too expensive. Instead, the proper thing to do it to give the person a few general options and the person can decide how much money to spend and what to bring. For example, dessert, snacks/appetizers or some champagne, this gives you the option to bring what you can afford.\nHowever, your friends might be seeing this party as something that you are all organizing together so they feel that freedom and ease of asking this of you.\nDon't panic! Not all champagne is expensive - go to your local liquor store and find some sparkling wine (only sparkling wines that are made in Champagne, France can be called Champagne, so everything else is called sparkling wine.) They will have lots of selection and you can get some that is cheap - remember not too many people are true champagne connoisseurs so they won't know the difference, just pick something sweet and most people will drink it!\nGood Luck!
559835
If you insist on a dowry, the bride should have every right to insist on viewing the family jewels and see if they are in working order.  No?\n\nI would think that only fair.
1187090
From an etiquette point of view, it is not allowed to ask for anything other than the presence of the invitee. If you can't afford the party, you should downsize it, maybe just rent a waterslide.\n\nYou can, of course, go through the guests' pockets which they will conveniently leave somewhere, but as Nixon once said, that would be wrong.
890687
if you know the bride is to wear red then you shouldn't. that's like you wearing white at an American wedding when you know the bride will wear white. that's rude and you are stealing the attention from the bride who should be the center of attention. she's the focus, not you. -unless- in China there is a tradition of women wearing the same color as the bride. do some research other than yahoo answers.
746390
I don't think it's required, but some do just out of love. But the groom has already bought an engagement ring so if he doesn't buy anything I wouldn't be offended. I'd just chalk it up to him being a man & just not thinking of it.
714361
It does seem a strange thing to do for a few hundred dollars, but she may be repeating this scam hundreds of times at once.  Then again she may be real, maybe she just wants to come to America to have a better life.  If this is case she is probably looking for someone to marry so that she can stay.  Either way, I think that you are right to be cautious.\n\nIf you can't get her out of your head, why don't you offer to buy the ticket for her (i.e. pay for it on your credit card, so she doesn't get any money directly from you).  If she accepts then she is serious.  If she doesn't she probably just wants you to send her a few hundred dollars!
626376
You can if you want to.  A lot of brides do.  I'm getting married in a few weeks and we decided not to exchange gifts just because we don't have the extra money, plus we decided to buy a dog after the wedding.
1147203
Don't worry, you are not being rude, your friend is.  She might be being a bit thoughtless because she's busy arranging her wedding.  Gift vouchers are perfectly appropriate.  Just give as much as you can afford and include a card with some heartfelt words about how much your friend means to you and how glad you are that she's getting married.
484668
I enjoy giving gifts to those people I care about. I like making them happy and seeing them smile. I understand that a lot of people feel pressure to spend big bucks for "holiday gifts", but you don't have to cave in to that pressure. Gifts don't have to be expensive, just as long as it comes from the heart, it can be something you've made, or something you've found that made you think of that person. And if you don't want to give for a specific holiday, then just give whenever you want to. There are no written rules on this.
626111
I haven't personally, but I know a few people who have. I think it is okay as long as you are being honest and up front with the person. One of my friends met this guy who wanted to buy her tons of things and take her out to fancy dinners all of the time. She didn't want to be intimate with him and she told him that. He was okay with it. He just enjoyed having someone to spend his money on.\n\nMy other friend was being dishonest however. She was seeing a guy who bought her a car and let her move into his apartment. He told her that he loved her and that he wanted to marry her. She told me that she didn't love him and that she couldn't see herself marrying him but that she hadn't told him that. I think that is completely unacceptable and I don't know how anyone in good conscience could do that.\n\nThat's just my opinion of course.