how can i help my 30yr old partner get over anorexia...has any1 any experience with male eating disorders?
815084
My brother also had male anorexia/muscle dysmorphia. He died at age 29 of heart failure due to complications however he was very muscular/low body fat and took way too many diuretics and/laxatives. Few people recognize male anorexia due to the fact that it is common in more females than males. Men also disguise a lot of their symptoms by stating they "work out a lot"\n  I was also diagnosed (anorexia/bulimia) at the age of 18 and have fought an uphill battle ever since. I have been in recovery since I was 26 and have found a healthier way to live. I and the Dr's do not think it ever goes away you just learn to handle it better and realize it IS psychological. Be ready HE WILL deny it and perhaps get agitated.\nI will think of you and him and I pray he gets the help he needs. Its a tough battle but one worth fighting to keep your life. \nPrayers and peace ~i~\n\nYou may want to look over these sites. The second link is a great resource for signs of the disorder. The third one is one mans story with the disorder.
795930
I once dated a very obese man, and wondered this myself.  In the end, I realized that he did not want to change.  There was nothing I could do for him, he had to want to do it himself.  We ended up breaking up, because he refused to do anything to change his unhealthy habits and that is not how I wished to live my life.  Hopefully, your boyfriend really wants to change his lifestyle not just to please you, but for his own health and well being.  In the end, if he doesn't really want to do it for himself, then nothing you do will help him.\n\nThat being said, there are some things you can do.  Number one, of course, is to be very supportive of him.  He will have bad days now and then, and you both have to work through it.\n\nThe best place to start is to look at his current routine and pick a few small changes at a time so the change is not too drastic.  This is not a temporary diet, but a lifestyle he should be able to really live with in the long run.\n\nDoes he eat breakfast?  Studies have shown that people who eat breakfast are able to lose weight and keep it off.  I recommend a low calorie/high fiber/high protein/low sugar cereal with skim milk.  I like cinnamon shredded wheat or quaker oatmeal squares.  Also include some fruit, like a banana.\n\nFor lunch, he currently eats a sandwich and chips?  Does he bring it or buy it from a place like Togos or Subway?  Either way, can he switch to wheat bread instead of white?  Switching to low fat mayo or using mustard instead will save a lot of calories.  Also, skip the cheese.  Turkey is a good lean source of protein, but lean ham or roast beef isn't all that bad.  Just stay away from meatballs or balogna or other fatty deli meats.  Also, put more veggies on it, like lettuce, tomato, and other things.  Instead of chips, could he have an apple or something like that?  At least choose a lower fat variety of chips, such as sunchips or those Baked potato chips.\n\nIf he is starved when he gets home, then I'd say he needs to have a snack in the afternoon.  Ideally, something with protein.  Maybe he could bring a protein bar to work?  There are a bunch of good ones out there by South Beach Diet, SlimFast, and Special K has a new protein bar as well.\n\nFor dinner, try fixing some grilled chicken, veggies, and brown rice or something similar.  It needs to contain lean protein, some kind of veggies (ask him which are his favorites so he'll actually eat them), and a complex carbohydrate with lots of fiber.  Also, drinking water instead of soda will make a HUGE difference.\n\nAs for the walking, I would say that's an excellent start.  It's something you can do together and get into the habit of daily exercise.  If he has injuries, it might not be a good idea to push him too much too soon.  Maybe try to increase the speed or duration of the walks a little every week.  You might try signing up to walk a 5K race in the spring, so he has a goal in mind to work towards.  Consult a doctor before you do anything too strenuous though.
1162532
YES!!!! i was anorexic and bulimic and I'm fine now. I did have to get help though, so don't think you can do it on your own!
1034419
anyone can be anorexic or bulimic. Men too.
872686
Not everyone dies from anorexia. Some people get better eat well and gain weight back only to relapse years later.My mother was anorexic years before I was born when she was young and she was very sick but after treatment she gained weight again. When I was a kid she relapsed and again stopped eating. I think anorexia can return at any time as you are never really 'cured' its always there, a constant battle. My mother is now 59 and she is still paranoid about what and when she eats, I'm always nagging her to eat better, to stay healthy. Most can eat enough to stay alive but still be slim although the long term damage caused by lack of proper nutrition is not good.\nMaybe your friends sister is bulimic if she's recently lost alot of weight and was a compulsive overeater? Bulimics and anorexics have the same goal (to lose weight) but bulimics eat then throw up where anorexics just don't eat much if anything at all.
453048
i recommend a counselor.there are probably issues behind the eating.\naddiction to food is like any other addiction.the sooner u get help the better.
649251
The biggest thing is listen to the doctor and dietitian and help him stay on his diet.  Support him in any way that you can.  He most likely just needs to know that you are on his side and there for him at this time when he needs you most.  That, above all else will help him the greatest.  Oh, and one other thing about the diet, try not to tempt him too much by having a lot of things in the house that would break his diet.  He will get used to it eventually and you may be able to bring some of that stuff back in, but at first, it will be hard for him to stay on his diet, so remove as much temptation as you can.
541674
I was married for 10 years to a man 24 years older than I was, but it really worked. I'm an old soul, and he had a very active inner child. We probably would still be together were it not for a logistical problem: He was claustrophobic, and I have the hoarding form of OCD. We had the EXACT same sense of humor, we were both great listeners and sharers, enjoyed doing almost all the same things together, had the same friends (both his age and my age). But the OCD problem caused him to stay away from home more and more after we'd been married several years, and to drink more and more. In the end, he was unhappy, I was unhappy, I gained a lot of weight, he was put off sexually. I guess we both were by then. But I love him still. The morning of our divorce, we went out to breakfast after!\nThe short answer is, it can be a wonderful match, very companionable, if there are no addictions or neuroses to drive you apart.  If you are attracted to each other and intellectually compatible, temperamentally compatible, go for it.  (Men his age would always look at us and wink or high-five him.)
257955
I'm male and 46,  My weight is within healthly limits so my weight isn't the problem.  It's that I'm not in shape.  There is a huge problem with body image in the US.  If one is healthy and in shape.  Weight shouldn't matter.  It's come to the point where eating disorders are hitting younger and younger girls and just recently it's been reported that boys are now having the same body image problems.  Good topic!
1048052
i had anorexia for five years, im not saying that you are but a lot of it sounds the same as me. when people are trying to help me i wouldnt let them in i didnt want them to take away the one thing that i had control of (My weight)  its only after i let people in to help me and it was hard that i realised how badly i have damaged myself. i have a lot of problems now from my skin and hair to my digestion and liver.... im sure you have a lot of people arouind you that love you a lot please please please ask them for help. its been 2 years now and im so much better!\ngood luck
305963
I lost over 30 pounds by eating just enough to get by with. You could try it. Or, my sister lost nearly 60 from a mixture of anorexia and bulimia. Whatever works for ya. For me, anorexia is easier than bulimia...
93358
I know some people that have had this and I'm sure you realize how serious eating disorders are. Try to help her decide to get over it. She must be the one that decides. Watch her because as you know, it can be life threatening. If she gets in too much trouble you must get her to a hospital. Until then, take steps to let her know it is a problem that needs help. If her family would help then get them to know.
175934
Well I really don't see an eating disorder! Don't mean to scare you or anything, but I see a psychological one! You have started your problem by saying that, "there isn't much food in my house because my bro eats it all. Whenever I buy food... My brain automatically makes me think that I must east it all before my bro gets to it!" You have answered your own question really! You want to finish the food before someone else does! I don't know how many years you had to live with your brother, but you have to condition your brain now so that fear of no food will leave you!
344987
Im a recovering anorexic!! I had anorexia from age of 12 to 20 and small episodes every now and then. And no it's not something a person is born with!!\nI developed it straight from the onset of puberty, i developed earlier than most my peers. And I have had a bad family life. My parents have separated numerous times.\nIt is a way of trying to gain control over my life when things around me are falling apart. It's not easy to get over and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone.
930470
First off how good of shape is your boy friend? Because I can tell you from experience that I recently gained and lost 20 lbs. I was just on a fast food things and drinking lots of beer, and I started to notice that my penis was not performing well anymore. It would get hard and then it would just go limp with out me being able to control it. Well fast forward a month and a half later I have lost the 20 pounds my abs are looking great and now that more blood gets pushed down there via my stomach muscles, I stay hard all the way through. \n\nTell him to start working out his stomach\nkegal exercises are must.\nThis will help his problem.
620956
I suggest getting her into a rehabilition program there are great ones all over the country that deal with just eating disorders or have a speciality program from them.  The best way to help her is not to ask but give. You and your parents need to have a sit down with her. (An intervention) You all need to write down everything that you love about, what her best qualities are, and what you see happening to her. Also a good tacket is if telling her all that stuff doesn't work, have her lay down on the couch close her eyes and have her a "funeral" (I know it sounds bad,but it really does help) she is not aloud to talk. But you all come up to her say everything you love. And talk about how the disorder killed her and how it has affected you. Tell her what ended up happening to all of you after she died. Like for example you started failing in school and ended up with the same eating disorder she had. And mom started losing weight because she was so depressed she would forget, she lost her job because the boss couldn't handle her crying infront of clients. Dad was never home anymore because he couldn'e handle everything, he became an alcoholic. Their is constant fighting.  When she hears things like this it is going to hurt her and she should realize how she is hurting all of you.
104949
Men's Health has great nutritional/health advice for both men and women, and it they have articles dealing with different age groups.  You'll find advice from licensed professionals not meat-head guys who live at the gym, but doctors who actuall understand the internal system of the human body.\n\nwww.menshealth.com