how do you know when, if ever, to "discipline" an autistic child?
820761
i think you know. i always thought behavior modification through positive reinforcement was much better than discipline.
134881
That is something you should discuss with their parents. Different parents think different levels of punishment are appropriate. Some parents may say deny them TV or a snack or put them to bed early. I doubt if many will tell you to spank them (spanking should be administered by parents anyway, IMO).\n\nBottom line is that it is the parents responsibility to assign discipline. Don't do anything to them until you discuss it with the parents - IF you want to keep the babysitting job.
553534
My step son is 11 and he's autistic... mild and high functioning but he still has a lot of the autistic traits. My step daughter is 6 and we recently had her tested for autism since she was showing traits of autism as well. Come to find out, she's not autistic, she's emulating her brother. \n\nAny 3-year-old is going to pick up traits from those that he is around. If his issue is one merely of delayed speech, then he needs to be working with a speech therapist. I'm rather surprised that he is placed with autistic children as any health care or educational professional worth their salt knows that young children are extremely impressionable. \n\nHowever, if you have concerns of autistic behavior at all...and if your son has not been diagnosed by a psychologist who specializes in autism, then I would highly suggest you bite the bullet and have him evaluated... if nothing else for you peace of mind.
887164
Well, it is normal for children in general. We all have interests & strengths.  However, most every single person with autism, especially kids, have "stims," which is short for Self Stimalatory behaviors. Some flap their hands randomly, or look really closely at things, like carpet, or do things they like repetitively, like taking things apart, then putting them back together. If your grandson is doing this over & over, it is not healthy. Stimming is healthy. We all do it, but most people know when to do it...when it is appropriate. Most  people with Autism who have stims, need to be taught to do them at appropraite times. I do not believe in removing a stim, unless it is harmful, like head-banging, or obsessions with their own feces.  The stims are merely to help them feel good, so I feel it is important to allow for that. \n\nWhat is absolutely not true about Autism is that all people who have it are savants; like Rainman.  Some people who have the diagnosis do have an almost magical ability to do something, like play the piano, or memorizing various things easily, etc., but not all people with autism have a special skill.  In every single experirence I have had- I am a special ed teacher- with people who are autistic, I have seen they are basically more capable then most everyone thinks. With the right team approach, those labeled "non-verbal can learn to speak/communicate. Those labeled "severely retarded" almost always have far more ability when taught how to respond & show" what they know.
754540
This is a tough, but fairly common, issue. Obviously, your administration is either clueless or powerless in this matter. A couple things might work. First, I would call the child's parents and ask to meet with them and the child after school. Explain succinctly and directly what the issue is and how they would like to see the matter resolved. Often, however, a child who behaves like this has issues at home, so that may not work. So, I would try to keep him after school with you to help out in the lab or the classroom in some manner. Give him some responsibilities, which could help boost his confidence a little, and engage him one-on-one in whatever topics interest him during this time. You can subtely approach the issue of his behavior, but not in a forceful way. I find that having that kind of relationship with a student can help manage behavior without having to resort to severe disciplinary measures.
907130
I am a certified music therapist, and there is a lot of research on the use of music to help autistic children.  There are many music therapists who work in school districts and you can request it for your child.  Check out this website www.musictherapy.org.  It will give you all the info. about music therapy and autism.  Click on frequently asked questions.
1119764
Here are some tips and suggestions that I hope will help you! I wish you all the best. Please keep in mind, as I'm sure you do, that not all children with autism are alike, and will have different needs. These are just guidelines, please consult an education professional who knows your child for the most accurate and relevant information for your family.\n\n- Recognize your child's strengths and interests and use these as opportunities for education (for example, if your child is very interested in Star Wars, you can teach math problems about Star Wars, make cleaning up into a game about Jedi powers, etc.) You never know when an interest may turn into a possible career option for the future (I recently read a book written by a man with Asperger's who made his childhood interest in "The Wizard of Oz" into seveal job opportunities! ["Demystifying the Autistic Experience" by William Stillman"]) (Source #1)\n\n- People with autism/Asperger's are often visual learners and learn well with pictures, charts, step-by-step written instructions, etc. (Source #1)\n\n- Consider reading books by authors with Autism/Asperger's (while these are often geared towards adults, I think they offer valuable information) Authors to consider include Temple Grandin, Edgar R. Schneider, Jerry Newport, Stephen Shore, and William Stillman (Source #1)\n\n- To motivate a child to use language, you could, for example if you know she wants juice, don't just give it to her becuase you know that's what she wants. Have her say, "juice," or if she is not ready for that yet, just the first sound of the word before you give her any juice. Gradually, very slowly, require him to say additional words such as, "want juice," then "want juice please," then "I want juice please, etc." before you give her the juice. Start with him requesting with one word for most of the things he wants (and keep this up for a long while), before starting to require sentences for any items. If you feel your child is not ready for this, please consider using the Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS) as an early step before implementing the above procedure. (Source #1)\n\n- Make clear and objective descriptions of the behaviors that are concerning you. Then, make some notes whenever the behavior occurs. You could make a chart with three columns: (A) What happens before the behavior, (B) What the behavior was, and (C) What happened after or as a result of the behavior. You may find that it gets her attention from adults, or that it gets her a time-out (maybe she is overwhelmed in the situation and wants to be removed). If you see a pattern from the information you collect, you could teach her other ways to get attention or whatever she is gaining from doing these behaviors. These could include, tapping someone on the shoulder, asking for attention, handing someone a card that says, "attention please" or "all done" (to get permission to leave an area), etc. Also, make sure that you are giving her praise or a reinforcer (something she likes) when he is engaging in positive behavior. \n\n- "Many children with autism are good at drawing, art and computer programming. These talent areas should be encouraged. I think there needs to be much more emphasis on developing the child's talents. Talents can be turned into skills that can be used for future employment." (Source #2)\n\n- "Teaching generalization is often a problem for children with autism. To teach a child to generalize the principle of not running across the street, it must be taught in many different locations. If he is taught in only one location, the child will think that the rule only applies to one specific place." (Source #2)\n\n- "I interpret language literally. It's very confusing for me when you say, 'Hold your horses, cowboy!' when what you really mean is 'Please stop
723452
You discipline a hearing impaired child the same way you discipline any other child. Your difficulty is in communicating, not in discipline. Always make sure the child has line-of-sight with you before you communicate. Does this child hear with a hearing aid, or do you communicate with sign language? In either case, always make sure to establish clear communication before defining rules or providing consequences.\n\nProvide clear rules, and ALWAYS be consistent for rewards and consequences.\n\nProvide natural or logical consequences as much as possible. For instance, the natural consequence of not listening to "watch out where you're going!" is a nasty bump.\n\nLogical consequences relate in some way to the desired behavior. "Clean your room, or we won't be able to read a story tonight." (Having to navigate a messy room takes the time and energy normally put into reading a story.)\n\nIf you do believe in spanking, keep it to one open bare-handed swat on the bottom, and only after the child has been taught the rule, provided a warning, and at least one logical consequence, and continues to misbehave. There should never be bruising, etc. and you should NEVER hit in anger. There is nothing like letting a kid know (when it is truthful) that you are too mad to give them the spanking they deserve, to raise their anxiety levels.\n\nAlso, make sure to notice the things they are doing right, and give a simple praise for it (e.g. "Good job.").
1164534
As a male, he is by nature aggressive, you cannot and should not try to teach him not to be aggressive.  You can, however, teach him control.  Let him know he has choices he can make in his behavior.   Get him in to sports or some other physical activity that will keep him moving and expending energy.  Guys hormones just do that to them.  If he is just a toddler, play, rough and tumble (and I do mean tumble, teach him somersaults) helps with balance and coordination and helps in falling skills in older children. When you know the child will fall, they need to know how to do it properly to avoid injury.\n\nIt's very hard to teach a child not to hit, this seems to be an ingrained protective response.  The child has not learned the differences in pain.  Physical pain vs. emotional pain.  All they know at this time is  They Hurt D-a-r-n it! (typed the regular way it looked like the OTHER word)  I did, however let him hit back IF the other child hit him more than once.   Turn the other cheek doesn't work well with children, and they need to know they have a right to defend themselves.  By allowing one hit  and not  cringing, his behavior would show the other children that he understood the hitter was upset and his character was big enough to allow that one hit. After that, it was self preservation.\n\nThis stood him in good stead.  The teachers in seeing this type of behaviour could see he didn't want the fight but was pressured to ingage. \n\nThe best you can do is teach him to think, and to think clearly and to see where his actions can lead.  When my son was in 2nd grade, he was suspended for throwing acorns.  After speaking with the Principal, my son and I sat down on a bench outside  under the Principal's office window and discussed the punishment.  It was during recess and I pointed out the acorn war going on to the oblivion of the teachers.  I explained why he was being punished.  The Principal overheard, came out and reduced the punishment to just the rest of the day.\n\nOn the way home in the car I gave him my true thoughts on the situation.  By seeing the example on the playground, and what resulted from our conversation, he realized that words of negotiation need to come first, then physical action is not always required.  People behave badly when they feel threatened.\n\nI apoligize for the long anecdotes.  After that long explanation, I now tend to believe you may have intended the word violence.  Thank you.
355940
Number one be consistent.  Demand that they are respectful, kind to others, tell the truth, and non-violent.  Put them in a time out chair when they do not listen or take away something that means a lot to them.  Don't letting something be all right one time and not all right the next.  Too many people confuse children this way. However, do not just focus on the negative.  Let your child know when he/she is doing well.  Children love compliments, and they love to make others proud.   If all else fails, call Super Nanny!
1105537
You're welcome (and mean it.)\n\nBe a Good Manner Model\nIf you don't often hear your child use the magic words-Please, Thank You, Excuse Me-notice how often you use them yourself. How often do you say these words to your child? Or to your spouse? Or to the cashier at the supermarket? Ever catch yourself yelling at inconsiderate drivers? (Who's taking notes in the back seat?) How good a sport are you when your favorite team loses a game?\n\nModeling courteous behavior is the best way to teach your children. They're always taking cues from how parents behave, says Dr. Leman. "Parents love to think about discipline as something that's passed down to children. But the fact of the matter is if you have a disciplined child, you have lived a disciplined life."
679291
There are several excellent programs designed specifically to help autistic students (and their families) cope with thier differences. Here are some links:\n\nhttp://www.teacch.com/\nhttp://www.autism-resources.com/papers/TEACCHN.htm\nhttp://www.spedusource.org/AutisticSpectrumDisorders.html
412948
I don't know how old your son is, but change for an Autistic child is extemely hard. I'm sure you know this already, though.  my brother has asbergers and he is going to be 21. each year he seems to be getting better and has had his medication reduced quite a bit over the years. he too has dealt with death and changing schools. a stable environment and support system is key for these two mental disorders.\n\ni think that children/people with autism need to be on some form of medication and therapy for the rest of their lives. unfortunately they were not made to function in the real world with as much comfort as others. \n\nthe key right now is stability and support, though. the right balance of these two things without making too much of a fuss that they are "special" is the best for them. i never felt embarassed or ashamed of my brother, and that has helped him grow into his own person.
653696
DON'T WAIT UNTIL HE STARTS SCHOOL!\n\nEarly intervention is key in cases of Autism Spectrum Disorders and Nonverbal Learning Disorder, and delayed speech.\n\nPlease ask her to take the following steps immediately:\n\nFind a pediatrician that specializes in children with developmental disabilities.\n\nContact the school system for a complete evaluation (this is free, and could have been before the child trained 3!).\n\nThe school system will choose a team of professionals to evaluate the child, including, but not limited to a speech therapist, an occupational therapist, a physical therapist, a school adjustment counselor, a school psychologist, a teacher and an expert in special education.  His parents  will be part of the team, and they may bring any experts they so choose to the team meetings.\n\nThe child's new pediatrician will submit a recommendation for the services the child needs.  The child may require an independent evaluation by additional specialists (pediatric neurologist, etc. to develop a treatment plan.\n\nMake sure that the team adopts the recommendations of his pediatrician and specialists in their entirety; appeal the team's decision, if necessary.\n\nThe team will develop an Individualized Education Plan (IEP) that specifies the services to be provided and the frequency of the provision, as well as the modifications that will be made to "regular" education to accommodate him.\n\nHis parents have the right to accept or reject the IEP, in whole or in part, and appeal same, in whole or in part.  If they choose to appeal and another, independent evaluation is required, the school must pay for the evaluation.\n\nThe school system is required BY LAW to provide early intervention services beginning at age 3, so he will probably begin in a special program, immediately.\n\nThis is a very complex subject not easily dealt with in this forum, however the above is a start.  DON'T WAIT!
1148867
I would say I was about  hmmm 5 or six when I started using words and such.  Most aspergers and autistics have trouble using body language and you say your child uses body language.  So far at four I would think he is closer to ADHD than autistic nor aspberger's.  My mother was quite concerned with me and took me to psychiatrists and other specialists on autism.  True the non-speech may point to autism but the body language and the hugs and kisses point strongly away from autism.  I really hope he starts speaking soon.  You wanted my e-mail no problem its canucksfan729@hotmail.com.
753588
Doctors diagnosed me with ADHD when i was a kid  for the same reason. Its a phase most likely cause she might get her way with her father when she acts out like that so she automatically thinks everyone else will give her way when she is like that. My suggestion corner or worse help with household work kids hate doing both and its way worse then a spanking. But do not give in to there temper tantrums ignore them or set them in the corner. She will soon realize her actions have consequences and will stop eventually but children will always look for alternative ways to stump you. Beware of the pity face and the Innocent looks there dangerous ignore them at all costs. Try taking away a favorite toy if the corner doesn't work or taking a privilege that she likes. like plying with her friends or cartoons. Let her know that newtons law for every action there is and equal or opposite reaction to every action is a true statement be the PARENT and not the child?
156548
You have to stay on the school and the teachers. Let them know that you are a concerned parent. If your not there call them. They should have given you a parent rights book when they made that decision. I have a 16yr old brother with Aspergers.  A good site to get onfo also is http://www.autismtoday.com/index.asp. Remember dont let up. They will see that you want whats best for him, not any special treatment.