What do you do when your husband whom you were in love with ran away?
831439
Thank your lucky stars he's gone.....good ridance to bad rubbish.  Move on with your life.
353795
well fist off he may have realized what he did to his wife was wrong. that should have been enough to send him running from your cheating ass! you both are dirty rotten cheating ass*holes. your spouses are to good for you guys. go home and treat the man you married better.
624402
I have been almost in the same predicument as you, but my husband cheated on me first after 18 years of marriage. We have two children and not only did this effect me, it also had a great impact on the children as well. I did kick him out of the house and after a couple of weeks he realized that he wanted me back and to have life back to normal. Well that does not happen over night. The trust was gone, I was insecure with my self and felt that things could never be the same again. We remained living in the same house, seperate rooms, and trying to mend what happened, then he got into a bad accident as well. The accident was so bad that after leaving the hospital after 6 weeks, I had to nurture and nurse him everyday for the next year. After a complete year of this I cheated on him. I believe that I did this to fullfill the hurt,anxiety,and the insecurity I had about my self. He found out the same way by tapping the phone of reason's of suspition and confronted me. I did tell him the truth about everything. At that time I also said to him "How does it feel to have it happen to you, now we are even". Well set aside Love does hurt, and we all can be cruel either mentally or physically. We react weird to these typs of circumstances. But happy to say it has now been 7 years after this has all happened, and our love never died, it took a great deal of time for the trust factor to regain itself. I'm not saying that the trust will fully every be regained, but as your relationship heals and your thoughts and feeling are open and honest with each other this is a start. Marriage to me now is more important than I ever realized, I want to grow old together. Everyone is differant but place value on your love and family, and take baby steps. If all else fells and things can't be reconciled then be good friends for your children and yourselves. Good Luck. Good things take time.
1119567
hi.that's what a lot of married men say.if you love him,you should let him go.tell him you don't want to cause there marriage to brake up.you should say to him you don't want to see him anymore. stand back and see if he leaves his wife anyway.if he doesn't leave his wife,then you'll know he wasn't genuine about the things hes been saying.
290573
WOW!!  I can so relate and can feel and understand the confusion and not knowing how to walk away from what you truly love, and believed was everything you had been looking for...  I wish I could tell you what the "right" thing to do is, but I would be a hypicite.  I know from the outside looking in that the self respecting and having love for yourself firstmost, would be to cut your losses and see him for the person he really is and not the person you're in love w/ that you THOUGHT he was.  To even consider waiting around for a man to deciede if he rather have you or an x is INSANE!!!  I know this in my mind, yet I have allowed myself to give up all my self respect and dignity for 6 months waiting for my so called "fiance" to decied between me & his x wife of 20 years.  In the past 6 months he has went back and forth 5xs! I also describe my guy exactly how you did yours, but I was wrong that isnt who he is.  I allowed to waiy and let him struggle w/ his indiscion tuntil I had no self respect left for myself & became willing to settle for him any way I could.  That's not what love and foorever is supposed to feel like.  Don't allow yourself to dig yourself into that hole because its a hard 1 to climb out of.  If he is'nt 1000% sure that u r the only one he will ever want, he is'nt worthy of you!  Don't sell yourself short.The loneliest place in the world is laying next to somone who doesnt love you any more, & 1 sided love is hell you deserve heavenly bliss- settle for nothing less.  My man walked out w/o a word and back 2 her 2 days ago, we finally spoke on the phone today and as much as I love who i thought he was I finally decieded i cant stand who he is.  Doesnt stop the hurt or build back my self esteeme i got alot of work to do to get over it...But this time I really believe he does want her mor than me , but why the hell would i ever let a man make that kind of descion i should have given him no more choice in at the 1rst slightest sign of comparing or weighing me against somone else.  Live and learn.  I*t is the hardest most painful 1 i have had to go thru, and hearring your ? i had 2 respond and share my understanding and expierence in hopes you won't allow yours to go on as long or as deep as I did.  Good luck, and ultimatly only u know what's right for u and only u have 2 live w/ the decision.  If i could leave u w/ 1 bit of wisdom it would be the man has to live up to your dreams, dont never settle for less than u have always wanted and deserve.  mr right is out there for us but we gotta get our mr wrongs out of the way!!!
472279
It's hard to admit it. But honey! Let him go is the best solution. When man turned his head away, He would never turn back. Believe me.
373773
Unfortunately I also lost the love of my life due to some faults of my own.  It took me a long time to realize that I had to let him go.  It was just not to be.  Only then was I able to work on my faults to be a better person all around.  That was a few years ago, I still love him, but haven't spoken to him since, but in a way I thank him for hurting me into getting help with some faults I really needed to fix.  Time is all that will heal.  I would let her go and take care of #1....YOU!  good luck!
1171346
I have been married 23 years. In the last six my husband has spent a lot time being unemployed, ran off a few times, then wants to come back. But each time he ran off I did better without him. For example two years ago when he left, we were living in a small rural community. I decided since he was gone, to move to a larger city. After I did, I worked two jobs. He lived with us (my kids and I) for awhile, sitting around painting pictures and making promises to get a job. In February, we got a large tax refund. While I was at work, he took off with $1500 he never earned! I decided after that to stop trusting him and take care of myself. I enrolled in a vocational school, a decision I've never regretted. He still wants me back, but doesn't want to live in this city. My kids totally hate him. I think I can do much better without him, even though I may be alone for the rest of my life. (I'm done with relationships)
788426
run run as fast as you can in the other direction dont look back and have no contact with him.... move on.. let go... get over it... he will if you will
937593
i would talk to him and explain your feelings. My husband and I used to play fight and when things gor out of hand I think he thought I was able to handle the come back, because I was willing to play. Men often forget how strong they are. Once I explained to my husband he was hurting me everything changed.
488046
I have mixed feelings about this one. I fell out of love with my husband years ago. I stayed because he was all I knew and we have 2 kids. My mistake was that i didn't confront him when i began to notice I didn't love him any more. Instead, i  told myself it'll get better. But it got worse.\n\nIn my experience, once it's gone, it's gone. I am now divorced and am OK with it. You are right about there is something in a woman's eyes. My husband said the same thing to me.\n\nI'm sorry I couldn't give you something more positive to stand on.
257996
Well normally I would say run to the nearest exit and so on! However you've continued the relationship with this man, and what's more you've been best friends for a long, long time! That's a lot of invested time/energy/love. I can only assume that the lie you're referring to was a cheating on his part. You had decided to forgive him, but cannot forget. (If this is not so please give more details) Why do you want to leave him now, is he continuing in the same way? - If this is the case, RUN! If not, if you just can't forgive him - then you have to decide whether you can go on without his friendship/love/companionship whatever the case may be! One of my favorite quotes, which I found very true in my case is, "It's not that I can't live without you, but I'd rather live with you." All the best in deciding!
144374
By all means tell him now. He will either run or stay. You need to know which way he will go. It's important for the both of you.
607342
im not going to judge you like others...if you love him like you say then you cant help what your heart feels.\n\nhas he been with you while he has promised to leave his wife? how long has this been going on? you need to take these into careful consideration.\n\nin these cases there are a few options:\n1. he stays with his wife while you keep hanging\n2. he leaves his wife and he dumps you\n3. he leaves his wife and you have a wonderful life together\n...is it any wonder why youre so conflicted?\n\ndepending on how long your "relationship" has been going on and how he feels about you (if he claims to love you too) you will most likely have to give him an ultimatum. because if someone REALLY wants to leave the person they married they would do it regardless of what stands in the way. plenty of men have left wonderful wives behind for selfish reasons...so if its just not working out with him and her then he needs to face that and move on.\n\nwhen you give the ultimatum and he says that he cant leave her...then theres nothing more you can do. if he says to wait some more, explain how you cant keep putting your heart on the line to wait for him. and NO MATTER HOW MUCH IT HURTS you must walk away. perhaps it will make him understand the situation he's in and make an appropriate decision - whether its you or her. \n\nand who knows - maybe even if he doesnt make up his mind right away he'll end things properly with her and come back to you. still, unless you leave (even temporarily) he will find it easier to just deal with the two of you to avoid any more drama than whats insued.\n\nthe best of luck to you in this situation - my heart goes out to you! make sure to protect yours!
762373
Excuse me... Unfaithful Loser of a Husband..  Leave him..  Don't have that fear of being alone, abandonment; I mean thats the only reason your still with him..  And what about love?  There is none if he's cheatin on you...  When he leaves to go on a date grab everything in the house and leave..  And file for your divorce.  Their are better men out there.
461746
Well, go with the old phrase "if you love someone, set them free."  Life works out in the strangest and most wonderful ways.  There may be some exciting and wonderful adventures awaaitng you when you move.
586199
Get over it, deal with the pain, and move on! I was married to a woman for 25 years, and one day when I came home from work, she had moved out and moved in with another man, just like that. It hurt  like crazy, but I dealt with the pain, and moved on. Never been happier in my entire life!!!