What is your best / most creative excuse you have used for getting out of a work function!?
816022
Saying that you got sick will probably work. First of all, don't go out where you can be seen by othera if you don't go to the function that night. Lay low, because if you are seen, you'll be caught and they will question your integrity. Second, say that you had diarrhea. No one will want to hear the details about it and they will think you are serious, because of the nerve of saying that you had it and that you had really bad stomach cramping all night long. Third, if you go to work the next day, bring a bottle of Imodium AD with you, so they can see that you still have it just in case it comes back. We've all had diarrhea at one point or another, so it's pretty believable and it's just not fun! Good Luck!
811327
Call in and say that you are having a problem with your eyes.\nWhen your boss asks what it is say "I just can't see myself coming in to work"!  Hah hah hah!!!
1147880
a good way to tell someone to go screw himself:-)
438583
You don't.\n\nDo your job, and screw around in your own time.\n\nGET BACK TO WORK!!!!
1068789
I know that I'm going to sound like a prude, but it would have to be hanging up on my boss while she was in mid sentence!! I was being called in on my day off (after just working 15 days straight without a day off and double shifts at that). I told her in no way shape or form was I coming in that day, that the restarant would have to survive without me for the next 3 days and hung up!!
770935
go to the boss and say, I would like to have my name tag back to take home as it was a gift\n\nthan put a piece of paper in the window with your name on it, let your boss come up with the solution
943418
I got fired for sleeping on the job.\n\nCoach
585683
Apparently, you got a BIG BREAK when you were hired! Walk around the office with a legal pad in your left hand and a bottled water in the other...stop by other peoples desks and ask there opinion on small matters, it gives appearances on work related issues
485688
Stop walking around and get back to work!\nSay hi once and just do a jesture next time.
987467
Absolutley. get back to work slacker....oh crap, here comes my boss..gotta go.....
953327
try sketchswap.com\n\nA great way to draw and get drawings back\n\nAlso register with a competition page and get lots of chances to win prizes - even a holiday to get out of work\n\nFind a posting board that you can get through the work firewall and make friends\n\nTake extended toilet breaks\n\nWalk around the building looking for a guy called "John" that works in accounting, unless you have a "John" then look for Jeff ;)\n\nBuild a house out of paperclips\n\nDelete all your e-mails that are actually relevant and wait for IT to find them - do this at least once a week for fun and to give the IT dept something to do\n\nEat cheese\n\nSend e-mails to the girl/boy you like in the office\n\nSteal stationary\n\nMove other people's work so that they think they are going mad.\n\nDance\n\nSing
814117
Enjoy\n\nAnd while working tomorrow look for a job you will actually enjoy on your bosses time and pay\n\nBaby Guinness for me thanks
43804
NO!  I was almost proved wrong at work tho, it was one of our most hectic, stressful, problem filled days in a while.  Thank god I was able to fix most of it!
779762
Good one!! Nice to let the motor loose now and again.\n\nReally, I hope you got away with it.
739636
Can you write me an excuse to miss work today!?  I really don't wanna go........Also, can you make my neighbor stop throwing his sticks and trash in my yard because he's too lazy to put them out front for the city to pick up!? I need someone with some authority to make that happen....N-kay! \n\n(Hey, I always wondered if God ever just "banged in" because of stress days.....Thx!~)
226672
Dear Sir:\n    I am leaving employment as of  xx/xx/xxxx.  \n                 Sincerely yours,\n                      xxxxx\n\nKeep it brief.  If you want to leave a reason, you can but it's often better to say nothing.
901594
quit your job or tell your boss to piss off!