how come it feels like i'm being victimized?
822725
We are all victimised...\n\nI love those answers from pseudo-psychologists who say they need more info to be able to help you! LOL\n\nHow the hell can you help someone that is obviously feeling down and depressed,,, you will supply them with bullshit psychobabble that you've learnt through your "life-experience" that will probably add to their psychoses...\n\nListen mate,,, go to your doctor.. they know you best and also know how to help... if not... talk to a mate at least... but DO NOT rely on amateurs on Yahoo Answers
193764
All of the above has happened to me more than once; at restaurants I have complained to the managers and if they are just as bad as their staff, I inform them that I will be telling everyone that I know how bad they're place is and those people will tell they're friend and so on. I have left stores that ignore me, my hard earned money is better spent elsewhere. And if I feel like I am being followed I stop, turn and confront the person doing the following!
632936
get out of the situation if you can. get your self away from the person who is abusing you! the reason why i put it that way is if you think or feel that you are not being treated rignt, chances are You are correct.\n you do not need bruises to be abused. even men are, but rarely feel free to say so because of how macho our society is.\n  here are a few questions to ask yourself.\ndo yu feel put down. are your friends asking you why you put up that all the time. \n   do you have to appologize for being you? critizied, corrected, or being told what ever you do wassn't not good enough.\n    do you feel like you are under a controll freak? what i mean is, all your time accounted for, are you told what to do all the time? if you work, is the time you leave and return so tight you get yelled at if there is heavy traffic?\n    if you have some sort of income, is every penny accounted for, with none left over for yourself. if you have something you need or want and there is money, do you have to ask, even if you ask are you denied it?\n     yelling, bulling, pushing, are clear signs of abuse. bruises, broken bones, rapes,and actual homicde are the end.\n abuse humiliates a person. it robs them of their identy. it can cause them to feel powerless to leave the person doing the abuse. in children in can cause confusion and rage so intense, that these emotions are almost impossible to controll growinging up if not given help.\n  with adults, the results still need counciling to recover from.\n the best way to honestly know if the situation your in is abusive, is to sit down with some kind of councilor, rabbi, priest,  or cleric. explain your situation, i'm sure, you will get far better advice that i can give you here.\n\n   good luck    looking
1012972
Your isolating yourself aren't you? Yes your pain is real,we all suffer in life ,but these are lessons, to learn how to live for the better. Have you received counseling for the abuse? And living in 8 foster homes was no picnic either , I know i have two brothers i took in and although I'm not related they are my kids. They have suffered greatly also, but slowly but surely they are moving on in life. Now another thing you probably have is the feeling that theres really no one out there for you. That's just not true, hun I wouldn't be here typing this letter to you if I didn't care. Neither would any of these other people. If you would like to talk some more just ask I will talk , I will listen, and I will feel what ever your experiencing and I will give it my best shot to walk through the misery you are experiencing at any given moment. I'm a mom, and yes of 8 of my own biological children, but my heart has room for more, so you decide if u want to contact me, just dont feel alone reach out to some one ,ok you are cared about know that, its a start to healing and gaining some kind of self esteem.
842973
Go find another place to live.  It's obvious this person is bothering you.  If you're worried about being raped, it's a no-brainer -- LEAVE!!
547806
The victums feel guilty in our society we have a way of making them defend themselves and their actions instead of blaming the perpetrators. For instance why were you at that place at that time of day. And the askers are the protectors of our society. It would be very difficult to answer after being traumatized.\n\nGood Luck and God Bless!!
1061124
I dont know but I think im suffereing from it.
559280
i think that is just the personality of some ppl. you just have to be aware of how other people are feeling around you, that's all. i sometimes notice if i'm making someone feel small, ignored or uncomfortable. just try to monitor that more... i know about the stress... it's crazy
66679
WOW, i know what you mean. I am sure you feel unloved, unwanted and scared to be like her. I am living proof that you don't have to be like her. I grew up with a horrible mother who abused me every single solid day, emotionally, mentally, physically I mean the works! I am now a loving, NEVER HIT MOM, and I do NOT scar my child in her ways. I am proof that you don't have to be like your mother. Ok? Email me if you want to talk sometime...i totally understand how you are feeling.....Missiowa2004@yahoo.com. Good luck and know you are not alone okay?
772350
That makes him a victim of abuse and he needs to seek treatment by a professional counselor. The thoughts he is having might be triggered by something else going on his life(if its been that long, its doubtful that he's gay). Since rape, and this was rape, is a typically a loss of control and a feeling of powerlessness with sex being the weapon used against the victim, its possible that something in his life has triggered these same feelings. Are you feeling powerless in a relationship or at work? Seek help to get these feelings out and resolved. While you were a victim and you didn't do anything wrong, you are now an adult and have a responsibility to yourself to get some help coping. Good luck to you.
392196
I am female and have never wanted to be a victim. There have been times when I was emotionally abused, but I fought back. I used the energy other women would have used whining and crying "I'm a victim!" and reinvented myself and discovered musical expression and co-wrote several songs with a new friend.  I did not enjoy being victimized, but I did not become a "victim".\n\n There are real, true victims....like the people who lost everything due to Hurrican Katrina or the Indian Ocean tsunami.  Those people are real victims.\n\nThere are others who, say many months after Katrina have not gotten their acts together and started making new lives for themselves and are bitching and moaning still, they loose all sympathy from me.  They have become professional victims. In other words loosers.\n\nThere are also many women who get mixed up with violent loosers and whine how men are all louts.  Those women are professional victims.  Feeding on the sympathy of others.\n\nThen there are racial groups who have sub cultures that are so dysfunctional they really believe its the other guys who are keeping them down.  They are the race baiting professional victims.\n\nAnd so much of the blame is heaped on innocent men, that the men are now feeling like legitimate victims themselves.\n\nHonest victims don't stay that way for long.  They find the resources and help they need to put their lives back in order and move on.\n\nProfessional victim classes never do.\n\nShame, shame on them!
231465
Sounds like you need a hug. When do you feel the most rage? What sets if off? The fact that you are asking for help is a good sign. Please, seek professional help so you don't hurt anyone ESPECIALLY yourself. Seek out that hug for me.
267595
I know how you feel. There is one fellow from a long time ago who was tormented as a child as I also was. One time, our collective tormentors goaded us into fighting one another, promising to end the torment of whichever one of us won.\n\nI have felt badly for years that the one I should have had the most empathy for was the one I ill treated, not our tormentors. \n\nBut does finding that person and apologizing make them feel better - or you? I asked myself that question, and realize that it would be of little benefit to the person I feel accountable to - it would only assuage my guilt. All I would be doing would be bringing up a long-past horror I know I don't care to remember. \n\nIf this person was ever going to forgive you, chances are they already have. Don't make them relive something simply for your benefit. Unless you were actually planning on reestablishing a relationship with  this person, take your lumps privately. It is the only decent thing to do.
147829
Probably because you are NOT an evil or violent person and do not want to inflict harm even tho someone is harming you.  I have felt the same way sometimes where I have been hurt very badly but would not hurt in return.  THIS DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE A COWARD so if anyone says that in response to this question ignore it.  You just operate on a higher plane than the person you are dealing with.
1010259
i am a pretty paranoid person, so yes i do feel like i'm being watched. some people watch others because they want to know if there life is more interesting than theres perhaps. other people are paranoid because they feel insecure about themselves.
703157
On occasion, yeah, I take things personally and it feels like the whole world is out to crush me.\n\nBut....usually, that isn't the case, because I have enough perspective to realize it isn't just me, that society in general just hates on *people like me*.  That if you are "blessed" with being both dirt poor[1] *and* plain-looking at the same time, a lot of folks *will* grief on you and give you crap just on general principle.\n\nIt happens.  Not a whole lot to do about it when people won't *let me* [2] do more to solve the problem.  It gets complicated [3].  Trust me.  :)  Hence the footnotes.\n\nHope this helps and have a good one!  :)
428210
People here have given you a lot of good advice.  I just wanted ot add that you are not an "idiot" because you are reacting to things that happened to you (and are still happening to you).  Also, you don't owe anyone an explanation of what is "wrong" with you - unless it's someone who you trust and you want to talk about it.  The problem is that a lot of people who have been victimized end up talking about it either not at all or talking about it to the wrong people.  The key is to get the RIGHT help.\n\nI'm sure that you have heard of PTSD or "Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder."  Your experiences in your family and at the nursing home could have caused this and having your "nerves on edge" and feeling scared are symptoms of this problem.  If your therapist doesn't know what to do, get a therapist who specializes in PTSD.  I am a social worker and used to be totally against medication, but in a situation like yours, I think you could see pretty quick improvement with a combination of good therapy and short-term use of medication (just to stabilize your mood so you can work on the issues). \n\nI know from my own experience and from just being around a lot of nurses, social workers, etc. that people who have grown up with trauma and drama seek that out.  HOWEVER, if I was your therapist, I would not advise you to be working in the environment you are in right now.  I admire you for wanting to help others, but you have to help yourself first.  \n\nI don't know how your medical/mental health system works, but is it possible to take "Stress-Related Disability" or just "Medical Disability" from work?  That way, you can still have some income coming and, since you were attacked at work, your workplace should be financially responsible to help you "get better" and to hold your job for you if you still want it at some point.  I could go on and on.  \n\nI just hope you can feel how much people care by all the people here who have written to you and I hope you can try to get some small belief that life can be better - that's all it takes is that tiny bit of hope to hang in there.  Please take care of yourself...