please help me husband and I to be!?
606939
Could age play a factor? Sure, but that's most likely not the direct problem though the problem is more than likely related to age with respect to either stress or chemical imbalance. \n\nThe most common problem for lack of sex drive is Libido which is directly associated with both Testosterone and Oestrogen (not Estrogen) levels, though Oestrogen level is a rare occurrence in men. A male can have complete ability to perform sexually without erectile dysfunction but not have the sexual drive to act on it. There are numerous medical remedies for the chemical issue but stress related problems would require different approach and treatment.\n\n\nRead 'Testosterone Levels" at this link:\n\nhttp://www.thefooddoctor.com/books/book3_men.php\n\n\nRead what other men say about loss of sexual drive:\n\nhttp://www.askmen.com/love/dzimmer_60/77_love_answers.html\n\n\nPersonal Thought: I'm almost 53 and my testosterone levels are actually marginally high (7.3g) so in my opinion its not his age so much that's a problem but more likely due to either stress or chemical problems.\n\nFootnote:\nAssuming your relationship is otherwise good then the one other possibility could be discounted and that is when a man's having an affair and getting his needs fulfilled elsewhere.
400883
that's a rough situaltion.  you just got to keep talking and telling him that sometime this is what happens, and just let him know that you both love him very much.  it gets harder but then it will be ok.  just remember you have great kids and thats what matters
149996
Move out. Tell your hubby it is me or mommie. no one needs to exist where they are slaves to thier inlaws. I cook I clean I work my butt off sounds a lot like cinderella except there will be no prince charming to help you out.
820492
You need to let him know that while you are married to him you are not his possession.... you are not a TV or a couch, or a car! He has proven his love for you in marriage but being your husband is a privilege and a joy that he needs to earn everyday... and in return there is no greater gift in the world than a woman who feels respected, loved and desired by her man... My wife is the best part of my life and there is nothing that I would not do for her... Your hubby needs to not take you for granted just because you said "I DO"... he should be romantic and earn your love!
447946
I just answered your other question and I felt the need to answer this one too! Girl you are in a very emotional state right now, you need to cut all ties to this other man, this is why you are being so hard on yourself! You need to FOCUS! Stick to the topic at hand and that is that of your marriage! You need to start talking more to your husband and let him know you feel no emotional support from him and let him know how you are feeling (if you haven't already)!\n\nThere are alot of people that both of you have involved involuntarily, they did not ask to be in the situation, you need to be the adult here and finish what you started right? Do what YOU KNOW is right not what every one tells you too! I hope you do get some answers here that will help in your decision making, but ultimately the decision is yours to make. Good Luck to you!
1057490
hun, no matter what you do it will be in the back of his mind that hes gonna have to leave you guys in 2 weeks.  just plan fun things to do with him.  you want to try to plan time for each of the kids to spend separate time with him as well.  But make sure you have lots of fun together no matter what.  when hubby came home for his 2 week R&R i made a welcome home banner and put it in a door way downstairs that way he saw that he was being welcomed home, not like he was about to leave.  good luck hun.\n\na military wife
530200
Try having a baby...you will be 'upgraded' to a parent and that feeling will definitely revive all that jazz...it will also bring you two closer in body and soul.
604066
I actually just told my husband to leave me alone the other day,but he asked me what was wrong and I said,'hormones...just leave me alone'. He did though and I felt better after having some time to myself. I think your husband needs to realize that no one is happy all of the time. We all need time to ourselves and it is good for you and good for the marriage to be able to take this time. As for having a big blow-out about it...I would've walked away. I don't take that crap anymore. It isn't worth it to me to talk til I'm blue in the face,trying to explain 'why'. I shouldn't have to. An argument doesn't really get you anywhere. I tend to wait until things have settled down and then have a conversation about it and find out what he is feeling then. I gave up a long time ago on trying to justify myself to him. We actually have a better marriage this way. Good luck to you.
1138307
look sweetie go to marriage counseling pray about it things will work out i promise
560058
Before you take advice from people you don't know.  You need to first listen to you.  If you love him and think you can make this marriage work, then try to work things out.  \n\nYou are right, the 1st year (and a few more) are hard, but that doesn't mean give up! I read your other question, and I don't think you got the "best" advice.  Consider the sources... (and here I'm talking and you don't know me from the rest of them!) \n\nBut I will say, go to someone who knows the two of you, someone who can be a voice of reason. And have that person mediate the issues you are having with your husband.  A good councilor will be able to help you there.  Find one. \n\nMy marriage ended over stupid stuff.  Things that could have easily been handled in an adult way, and fixed.  If you love your husband, go the hard road and try to forgive and get to the bottom of your issues.\n\nFor the fourth time tonight, I will suggest a few books that I believe could have saved my marriage if I had them before it was over...\n\n1. The Five Love Languages- Probably my favorite... it talks about the different "languages" of love we can offer to each other. Everyone has one or two that are their main love language, and if you are not communication to you spouse in THEIR love language, then they probably won't feel loved... great book.\n\n2. Love and Respect- it talks about the different needs of a husband and a wife. It relates to each of you. It's split in certain areas to directly talk to you and to your husband. It talks about how women see things thru "pink glasses" and men see things thru "blue glasses". It's eye opening...It's wonderful.\n\n3. Friendship Factor- This one is SO basic. It was like a light going off in my head each time I turned a page. It helps you realte to others better as WELL as your husband.\n\nI would read them in that order...together with your husband. You can find them in the Christian/ Religious section of most bookstores. And don't worry, they aren't overly "holy" if you are weirded out by Christian books. It's just that God designed man and woman for each other, and boy oh boy does HE have some good principles to build on. The books are very relatable and easy to read quickly.\n\nGo get advice from a source that you can trust. Know that my heart is with you as you are suffering.  And I hope that you can see past this incident, and try to make some sort of sense of the issues you are having.
805758
Take him to see "Fast Food Nation".  I used to be an adamant fan of fast food restaurants, but have cut back significantly on dining out in the past 6 months.  My excuse was that I was too lazy or tired to pre-plan meals, so fast food seemed to be the easiest quick fix.  If you like to cook, try to begin planning meals ahead of time, and ask your hubby input on his favorite foods.  Once you begin cooking, you might cook 1x week and slowly build up to eating at home more often.   Once he gets a taste of your home cookin, he will crave your yummy (healthier!) dishes more often and will want Mickey D's less often.  Plus, you will glow from all the praise:)  If you hate cooking, just try to get healthier take-out and like I said before, GO SEE fast food nation!!!  It's eye-opening and you will get to see a whole 'nother side to Big Macs and Mcnuggets.  A pretty nasty one.  Good luck!!
1069181
try to focuse on ur home try to spend ur time in making the house cleaner try to make food decoriate ur house think that thier is no preson will care about u that mush expet ur husband try to have a baby thise will give the feeling that ur husband is every thing in ur live and good luck
815955
Whenever you get on the internet, set a stop watch or alarm clock for a set amount of time, say half an hour, and when the alarm goes off get off the internet and turn off the computer.  Also, set a limit on how many times you can do this during the day, and have your husband help you stick to this.  He could maybe set a password only he knows on the computer so you have to ask him when you get on and he can help limit the number of times you get on.   I would also suggest finding activities that you can participate in either alone or with your daughter or husband outside of the home to occupy your time.  Hope this helps!
617415
cook clean feed baby dress baby clean some more take care of dogs take a shower have dinner cooked .... just kidding i have found that it isn't always that simple.. i talked to my hubby and told him there is no possible way to do it all... try giving him one day to be in your shoes then see what he has to say!
749311
one night you should tell him to take it easy, and you should cook like your favorite meal, and then pop the question.....make it a speech tell him "He's my homemaker, housewife and my everything when I get home from a long day of work. I manage a large portion of a company and have just recently been too sick to function. He has nursed me and been by my side the entire time, never leaving me for more than a few minutes at a time (he has to shower and go to the bathroom afterall.) We're a solid foundation together, and now that I'm feeling better (and I have a ring).. I want to do it." its very much from the heart i can tell, good luck sweety with everything and congrats on the baby!!
251164
eat (but not before feeding everyone else) \nwork (like a dog for everyone but yourself)\nsleep (but not before your husband had his way with you)\n\nrepeat\n\n(same as today in 95% of the world)\n\nPS I like the 1550"ad"!
429907
You need to go with your husband no matter what.  when you married him, you made that commitment.  I know its gonna be hard, but you can always come back and visit.