I still have feelings for an ex that i am best friends with now?
603962
Brandi\n\n That's a really tough situation.  You didn't say why he's an ex, but it's obvious that you both still have feelings for each other. \n\n You've got three options:\n\n1- Just friends: This is probably the toughest, since there's something on both sides that is pulling you together.  If you're in another relationship then you cannot take this any farther than "just friends."  Talk to this guy and ask him to help ensure the relationship stays platonic (not romantic).  Then be very, very careful to maintain your distance, so the kiss thing doesn't happen again.\n\n2 - Get back together.  Again, I'm not sure what heppened the first time.  There have been thousands of relationships that have split and then gotten back together.  Without knowing more details about the first time around, I can't say if that might be successful here.  But it sounds like you should at least consider the possibility.\n\n3 - Or just don't see each other at all - neither as friends or as lovers.  If neither of the above can work for you, this is the only course left.  It's tough, but you have to make a decision and stick with it.  Be very, very careful not to put yourself in a situation where either of you might slip.\n\nOne final bit of advice: men and women see relationships differently (in general; there are always exceptions).  Odds are that for you this is a heart issue, for him it's another body part.  I don't mean to be callous - he could be a sensitive, romantic, sweet guy, but there's a possibility it's still about wanting a physical relationship.  Or maybe you just have the hots for his bod - although from your question it looks like it's much deeper than that.  But keep that in mind as you explore those three options above.\n\nSo look at what happened the first time around, weigh your other relationship, what you're capable of, and what you know about him. Evaluate each of the three options.  The important thing is that once you make a decision, stick with it - go out of your way to make sure you follow through 100%.  Good luck, and I hope it works out great for you!
514061
I hear ya hunny. The same thing happened to me nearly 4 years ago. When we broke up I took him off my aim list and didn't talk to him for about a year because it was just too hard. He also started seeing someone about a month after we broke up and he is still with her. It does get easier but it is a very very slow process. You just gotta build up talking in general before you can start talking as best friends again. It was just last year that we could start talking like buds again. If he was your first love you may never get over him but eventually you will have to put that behind you if you want your friendship back.\n\nJust try and give it some time, Best Wishes!
1023767
talk to your best friend about whether or not she would be comfortable with you dating either of them! on one hand, she probably still has feelings for her ex, no matter WHAT she says...on the other, she may feel like you are giving her younger brother more attention than her, and that may cause a rift in your relationship...my true advice, date someone that has no ties to your best friend, or you may risk losing her friendship forever. boys will forever come and go, crushes lose their potency...but a true friend is something to be valued more than a boy toy.
579003
Your ex is your ex for a reason. Remember that. It sounds like you have a good relationship with this other guy, I think you need to let your ex go and forget about anything that might take you back to him. You are not being fair to either guy by running to the other when you have problems. Instead, get on yahoo answers to help solve your problems...lol! just kidding. But seriously, you need to move on with this new guy. You might feel things for your ex and that is natural because you have a past together...but it's just that, a past. Time to look to the future and move on. Good luck!
1116801
Ok. I had the same problem. There was one guy I was with and we broke up so I went without liking anybody for a while. Then one of my best guy friends broke up with his gf and I realized I liked him but then my ex started coming back. So I chose the one that is the sweetest and that I have the most fun with and that wasn't my ex. It just so happens i picked the other guy who's my ex's best friend and we've been together for almost 4 months and I have a great ime with him all the time. although they aren't friends anymore, I still really like my bf. so pick the one that's sweetest to you and that you have the most fun with. even if that means long distance. (i'd choose the ex because he seems like he would be a great bf and that he really cares about you as lot).
69872
I've had this situation 4 months ago. We've just talked about it.. I frankly said, that i don't love him. He offered me to be friends. So we are very good friends right now. But I feel that i'm more than just a freind for him...Sometimes i think that it would be nice if we were together but can't do it right now, 'cause i broke up with my ex-bf yesterday. And i don't want to lose my friend.. It's up to a person :)
1044340
Tell her how you feel and what you want. If she feels the same, great. If she doesn't, though it may hurt, move on. It is not worth it to hold on for weeks, months, years for something that isn't going to happen. You may end up missing out on the real good stuff by standing in as your best friend's back up boy.\n\nYou said it yourself, she is your best friend. That may be all she will ever be.
155353
thay may just be trying to keep your feeling from being hert  after all he is a ex tell your friend how you feel about it all .the good times you had and the bad thing .and then move on
527247
It is natural to have feeling for the EX, just remember, there is a reason he's called EX, and you are the only one that really knows the reason for that, so as you began to get these warm feelings inside for the EX also remember what usually would happen after that warm thought would come remember the reality of why you made him an EX and EX-ommunicate your thoughts for even going in that direction, okay, Sista Girl.  Remember, you want your PRESENT to work out, so please, leave the EX, as an EX. He had your PAST, DON'T let him have your FUTURE.  PEACE.*
799452
Yeah darlin' it sounds like you're feelings are stronger than his at this point, sorry.From his point: I think it's hard to be best friends w/ a member of the opposite sex when you're  involved with someone. He may feel like he's betraying her. She may be putting some sort of pressure or negative input. \nAbout you  feeling "used" when he comes back after their break up... (which BTW their future break up is 99.9% probabable, statistically)..though I do see your point,  if you understand human nature, and as you get older you'll see this same thing again and again, very common, because people change, life is change. Change can be difficult, especially in relationships. \nNow as for numbering your friends in a ranking system, and should you call him this lable or that lable... I think once you guys can get past that "disastrous system" and began to see all the people that you really enjoy being around as your "closest friends" without the number/lable system, I believe there will be a lot less hurt feelings and heartache between all of you. Not saying we didn't do the same exact thing when I was your age,and it sucked being  #2,3 or 4 then, just as it does now. But since I did survive my teen years, I want to share that with you! My advice to you is to be the best friend that you feel comfortable with being to him, and her, without crossing the boundaries and getting into their "relationship space". He's your friend, she's your friend until either of them stops being what you consider to be a friend, at which time they are no longer a friend...\nMeanwhile use YOUR energy on YOU not him!  Good luck girl...
444696
Going after a guy that your friend has dated is always tough. It depends on how their relationship ended and whether your feelings for him are strong. I am currently very interested in my ex-best friend's ex-boyfriend. WE stoped being friends when she found out that I liked him. But I couldn't help how I felt, he's different than any other guy. If you feel like he's special and you could be avoiding something that could be really great for both of you, don't. Go for it, if your friend really cares about you she'll want you to be happy. Best of Luck!
477236
everything is possible..but this kind of situation depends if both of you are really meant to be..if you, then you will always find the way to each other's heart..me and ex broke up, right now we are friends but i don't know yet if we'll be together in the future..time will only tell..
123948
Depends on how long they have been seperated. But really I would see if you friend still had feelings for him. She chould take it personal.
952941
You can't help the way you feel, it is being human.  I had a similar situation when I was 17.  I had been best friends with him for 2 years and gradually we got closer and closer.  For me it didn't work out but I am glad I gave it a go otherwise I would all ways wonder what if.  I think life is far too short to have regrets.
1154637
Its common to have those feelings cause you think you can trust the person with all your inner details and secrets... The way you would want a serious relationshiop to be. And you have to remember,t he person you want to spend the rest of your life with has to be your friend first. You should think of them as your best friend. And love simply follows naturally. Thats the recipe for a great relationship anyhow.
662021
On the market at the moment,but i have a crazy ex who thinks we are still together!!
1072575
umm stay with ur man u guys just gota do somethign diff to spice things up... from my experience dont go after ur BFF's ex..my ex and i broke up and she went out with my best friend... they ended up breakin up and she tried to get back with me... now i dont like either of them.!! its just not right and could cause a bunch of problems like not ever talking to ur bff anymore and u said he is your friend then if u guys break up u might not be friends anymore.... so stick with ur man!!!