Family Law- I raised my twin sons for three years on my own. PLEASE READ?
600769
Sounds like you are NOT a biological parent, but somehow raised the children as a custodial parent.  That is not good news for you.  Generally you have little chance to win any kind of visitation. \nI am sorry you will probably have to wait until the children reach the legal age.
670466
man you are on your own... get a lawyer.
29121
I don't know where you live but I live in Ontario Canada and I had custody of my children. The reason being that I requested the court to appoint the children their own lawyer, it did and because our chidren have rights here they choose to be with me. The childrens female lawyer and my female lawyer fought my ex's femail lawyer and what it all boiled down to was the childrens right to be with the parent they wanted to be with. If a child has the capability of choosing then the courts will or at least should listen to them. I did have a male lawyer but because my ex wife had a female lawyer my lawyer recomended that I have a female lawyer fight for me and for the kids. I won custody and my ex had to pay me support for the raising of the children. More and more fathers are getting custody now cause here there finding out that the mothers do not stay at home with the children as much as they first thought. Aparently the fathers do stay home and do spend more time with their children when they have custody. Don't give up your fight and good luck
159661
If you are comfortable with doing that then do it, but I would get a lawyer involved to make sure that you can see your children and get it in writing. They will always know you as their dad and im sure you love them alot, and they are just lucky enough to have another man that loves them just as much as you do.
814251
In the UK you can file for your own divorce with the courts and do not have to use a lawyer. Ive been through divorce twice, it was a costly business I agree. Not planning on doing it again with my 3rd husband :) Good luck hope you can work something out.
709504
I live in Pa also and tried to do the same thing.I was not permitted to have my child's fathers rights terminated,and he hadn't seen my son for years and sent very sporadic child support.The reason I was given,according to my lawyer,was that in Pa,a child cannot be made a "bastard",terrible name,but that is what they legally call a child without a father.If I had been remarried and my new husband wanted to adopt my son,that would be a possibility,but they cannot make a child fatherless.Their reasoning I'm sure is that the child might then become the states responsibility if the mother alone couldn't support the child.This is the experience that I had dealing with the same issues.Good luck to you.
677765
MY daughter and her boyfriend got his sister when his father passed away it will be 1year on the 19th of this month. They still have a mother (if you could call her that)alive but she walked away. Now they have to go to court that is what they were told by a Lawyer but since she is 17 they have decided to for go that. So my dear I would say to call social services to see what they suggest. I also live here in flint want to talk any time E-Mail me at kellipremo@sbcglobal.net Good luck
206765
Oh can I relate to/with you on this one!!! I have four kids. He has one. I love this man dearly but making my four walk a narrow line and expect the best is great until it comes to his son who can do,say,etc. what ever in the heck he wants! I simply told him about it. After all, I can live without a man or find another one but my kids are all I truely have and can not be replaced. Equal...the whole house and everyone in it. No one is more special then the other when it comes to discipline! If you are in the wrong, it is our job as the parent to help set the child back down on the right path! Good luck and remember, eventually your kids will notice and hold it against you for not doing or saying anything! Good Luck!!!
751531
Try to harvest this side, you may be able to change an existing form.  (e.g child custody and visitation right).\n\nBut I would let a lawyer formulate this: especially in a life threatening situation (surgery) you need a lot more (and there is maybe also the sons mother involved).
627687
You need to go through the courts.  Have a child support order made by the courts, with an income deduction order, so that the money is just taken from his check and deposited into your account (no more bounced check worrries).  I went through what you are going through for years until I finally went to the courts.  By this point my ex was $14000 in the hole but had purchased a new car, enrolled in college for his masters degree, and was living great.  But whenever I questioned him about it, he would tell me how hard he was struggling and that he just couldn't do any better.  I, however, was living on a prayer and wish, maxing out credit card for grocery and clothing for my son.  And wondering if I would ever be able to get out of the hole he'd made.   \n\n\nIt took 10 months for the courts to straighten everything out.  I requested that I keep my son's insurance on my policy because my exhusband was very unstable and changed jobs a lot.  They had no problems with that.  They garnished his income tax refund for the next 3 years and made it very clear to him that his child was first in his life, not his new apartment  or car or school. \n\nHe pays the very least a non-custodial parent can pay.  I was not trying to break him, I just wanted my son to have the benefit of both parent's income.  Which I think is his right.  \n\nThink of it as fighting for your children.  You would never let anyone else take anything from them or cheat them.  Don't let their father.  If they lived with him, he wouldn't have a choice about taking care of them.  He shouldn't just because ya'll aren't together.  \n\nYou don't need a lawyer.  Just go to your local office for Child support enforcement.  If you don't know where it is, search child support and your state's name.  \n\nAlso, think about life insurance policy -- child support orders normally require both parent carry one because you need that assurance in the event of an untimely death.  \n\n\nGood Luck!!
187364
There are a lot of things you've left out so it's hard to say.  Where you live, where the child lives, if you are one of the biological parents, are another family member or if you are an interested party who is unrelated.\n\nThere are many things that need to be taken into consideration before anyone can really answer for sure.\n\nMy best advise would be to go on www.allexperts.com, find an attorney who deal with this matter and ask your question giving them all the detailed information they will need.  This particular site is free, all the experts on this site volunteer their time.\n\nGood luck!
732941
email me at corbett11@yahoo.  Depending on your income, you may qualify for a public defender.  You can also try a Volunteer legal services project.  They are lawyers who volunteer their time for these matters to lower income ppl.  Try to be amicable with the father as it is in the best interest of the child.  Go for joint custody.  Allow the most for relationships with both parents.  You can hate him if you want, but dont use the child as a pawn.  My ex is and I didnt get to see her for 3 months.  Not cool.  Also, File for Child support tomorrow, along with a petition for visitation/custody.  Your parents and his have rights as grandparents and can be entitled to time as well.  Try to take a parenting course that deals with the psycholgical aspects on the child (A.C.T. - Assisting Children with Transition) or something similar.  The 0-3 yrs are the most crucial in development for your baby.  Keep that in mind.  This is when the relationships and bonds are formed.
346479
Wow, that's rough.  And I belive that you have your children's best intrests at heart, but before you do something like that talk to their school, there are programs that can help you with lunches and clothes, ect. Plus you should be able to draw social security on your spouse (my sis & I got it after our mom passed).I know it may not be much but something is better than nothing. I'm sure you've explored your options, but where there's a will there's a way.  Please use the foster parent only as a last resort. Loosing one parent for a child is bad enough, loosing two is even harder.  Explore all your options.
742493
It depends on so much.  My brother in law had the same issue.  First of all we live in Ohio so I am not sure what the laws are in Michigan.  In Ohio it is if you are the child's sole provider, in other words the father is not around or paying child support and has no custody visitation, for 3 consecutive years, then you have rights like any other father.  My brother in law actually got temporary custody of his stepdaughter due to her mother leaving her with his parents.  I guess basically all you can do is check with your lawyer if you are going through a divorce.  There may be a way to work this into the divorce papers.  Good luck and I am glad to see someone wanting to step up and be there for a child that is not their own!  It takes a lot of courage and guts to do that!
332464
Honey, it's a tough situation all the way around. You both need to find a way to sit the kids down together and have a full blown disscussion. The kids are going to need reassurances from both of you that you both will still be active in their lives and that what is going on is not their fault. Both of you as parents need to make sure that both kids know that they can count on you and come to you whenever they need to. If it were me,as a mom of 3, I would put aside whatever has caused the seperation and call a meeting with my kids and my husband and do exactly as I said above.
465268
you need to go straight to a lawyer. I live in Australia so i don't know the laws where you are perhaps living. But you could go to social services or child welfare and tell them that you now have care of the child that your husband has legal rights to. Those rights would also have obligations on his behalf. I don't know how old the child is but asking what they want is a good start and then seek all the professional advice that you have to to resolve this. This child like all children must have love and stability. Going back and forth to dad when it suits him could have long term effects on this child. You never mentioned under what circumstances he was awarded custody. I have to take you at your word as i don't know you but if you love your child and feel that they will be better of with you and you can provide for their needs, all of them, challenge the ruling and do what is right for the child. Someone professional to help your child through all these confusing times and transitions is probably a good idea. Good luck to you and i hope the little one gets through this turmoil with as little scarring as possible. Looks like that's up to you.
93014
your state must not have a scale that is used based on her income and your income. dont go to jail. go to court. have the younger son talk to the judge alone in chambers. it can make all the difference. your attorney can set it up with out her knowing until the last minute. fight for your kids. hope your older son gets better soon.