how can you motivate a lazy 19year old   teen am at wits end. thanks.?
596505
I could never put my children out but this is what I did with one lazy 19 year old.  He came home from a hard day of running around to find he had nothing in his room but a pillow and one cover.  Since he paid no bills, he wasn't allowed to use my electric, my air conditioning, his stereo, NOTHING.  He was allowed to sleep in his room from 10:00 P.M. until 8:00 A.M.  The rest of the time he was not allowed in the house.  He was allowed to eat breakfast, get a drink of water and use the head before he left.  When he was able to pay me $5.oo per week, he regained his room 24 hrs.  When He was able to pay me $5.00 more per week. he got back his stereo and T.V.  He took three weeks to tell me he had a job (at MacDonald's).  Before the month was over he was able tp pay me $20.00 per week to have his normal room back.  I put all the money in an account for him and 6 months later  he had a down payment on a car.  Now he has a better job (construction), a girl friend he can afford and a car with insurance.  I believe that he hated me at first, but now, every once in a while, he says, Poppa, thanks for making me get up off my butt.  Things are so much more enjoyable.
492628
First of all, STOP calling him stupid...especially his Dad.  Tell dad that most boys CRAVE approval from their fathers.\n\nNext, consider that he's probably a pretty normal kid (I'd guess around 13 or 14 years old).  Adolescent boys are usually bored and looking for some mischief to get into.  \n\nWhat other outlets does he have to keep him busy?  You say "...when we leave him home alone".  That's telling.\n\nHe needs some intense activity.  Does he play sports?  Nothing relieves boredom and aimless activity like football, track, swimming or wrestling practice every day.\n\nThink about these ideas.  If they're all off the mark, or they've all been tried, or he's much older than I assumed (over 17 years), then I'd consider some counseling.\n\nBut remember...FIRST, stop calling him stupid.
796230
I am going to assume you are also on meds for ADHD  A lot of time these medications can cause you to be rather lethargic.  I think you should talk to your doctor about all of this and see if there is something that can be done.  I don't think you lack motivation and you are smart enough to know you are being lazy so I think there is hope for you.  You realize there is a problem and that's a big step.
493947
I dunno...but when you find out, let me know! \n\nHow about picking up the latest issue of People Magazine with the "Half their size" people.  That always motivates me, at least temporarily.  \n\nI used to have motivational posters around the house too.  If possible, find a friend who is willing to check in on you periodically who will help keep you motivated.  It's hard I know...but once you lose the weight and keep a lifestyle of eating better and exercising, you'll feel sooo much better.
1171188
Older people just get to be more intense, more of what they already are.  Teenagers are just trying to become more like adults.  Sometimes the two don't mix.\n\nIt would help if you could sit quietly and try to figure out what you are doing that is pushing her buttons and then try to work on that.  Did you leave a mess?  Is she exhausted after a full day's work, having to return home to a house full of people that she has to clean and cook for?  Is anyone helping her out or is she just old and grumpy?  If she left you how would you take care of yourself?  Would you feel bad?\nIf that doesn't work for you, try a sense of humor.  You might not be able to say what you re really thinking to her because she might not understand you, but you can enjoy the comedy of the situation.
87378
Try his classmates. There's bound to be one who's nice enough to help him. Also, YOU could try doing it.
442301
Well, you're never gonna be scrawny, but I don't think it'd take much to get you in shape. You could lay off the carbs (bread, pasta, etc..) but starvation is DEFINITELY not the answer for you, especially at your age. The less you eat, the more you teach your body to get more nutrition out of less food, and then you have to starve yourself for the rest of your life. \n\nI think exercise would be best. Start with jogging in place, maybe jumping rope, move on to pushups, sit-ups and chin-ups. Jumping rope, for anybody that's capable of it, is a really good exercise. \n\nIf you don't want to get too much attention, try exercising in the basement or garage. Harder to hear feet hitting the floor if the floor's made of concrete, and sometimes you just don't want parents involved in your personal decisions (I have daughter that's 14).\n\nYou may need motivation. You're a guy, right? Take off your shirt and take a picture of yourself. Tape it up on the inside of your bedroom door. That way whoever comes in never sees it, unless they close the door behind them. If you share a bedroom with someone, maybe tape it inside a folder or book, or something.\n\nI'm not a big fan of going to the gym. Too many people looking down their noses at me. Right now I have a job that keeps me in shape, because when I get home I'm just lazy. When I was your age I had a paper route, and was on the swim team.\n\nAnd of course, the thing I say to everybody that's unhappy with their weight:\n\nDon't look at the scale. Muscle weighs more than fat. If you can feel good about yourself when you look in the mirror, you've reached your goal.
623248
There are some important factors behind the encouraging teens to find purpose in their lives.They are mentioned below.\n\n(1) First you have to win their confidence. On this, you need to listen them much and try to understand them well.\n(2) Second, you need to create a more suitable environment which can help them to find purposes in their lives.\n(3) You must make opportunities to them to deal with people who are success in their lives in different angles.\n(4) You must help them when they are needed your help.\n(5) You should help them to do new things and encourage much even they do a little creation.\n\nIf you are able to take above mentioned steps, it will be very easy to encourage teens to find purpose in life.
1031629
she is too lazy. talk to her. let her know that you cant do everything on your own.
828377
hey leave da house more often!!!!\nindoor activities like internet  and tv make u lazy nd out of place\ngo out for atleast an hour-meet ur frnds,make new frnds remember frnds r really imp 4 ur dvelopment!!!\nso chill out nd enjoy!!!!!!
758264
I think that there is more going on in the child's life than just not wanting to do his work.  There is something that is keeping him/her from being motivated to work.  So, I guess the big question is...How do you motivate them?  I have been trying all year to answer that question.
841065
Good Luck! I have a 15 yo with the same problem. He is ADHD with severe impulsivity and it has been a continuous battle to do any kind of school work. He would come up with all kinds of excuses about not doing his school work. I also didn't know what to do. So I started NOT letting him do anything. No TV, no video games (on TV or portable), no friends over, no going anywhere, nothing. He finally got the message. He told me he was going to give me "The Mean Mom" award because I wouldn't let him do anything or go anywhere. The thing was he knew most of the work, just had a hard time putting it on paper. He is in high school now and being homeschooled (which really works out much better). But the 'doing nothing' still stands if he doesn't do the work. He still has a problem with taking it out of his head and putting it on paper (he can tell you anything you want to know about his subjects, orally). But he has to put it on paper. But now he will sit down and do the work. I told him I was not having this foolishness anymore, I know he can do the work and if he wants any free time he'd better get it done.
723924
This might sound hectic, but it works. "If the heat is on, you must be ab le to walk away in 9 seconds"\n\nLife is too short to dedicate it to someone that has become lazy and unloving. Believe me, there are better people worth dedicating your life to... and they not too far away
446106
Don't let the child play or watch tv or whatever until homework is finished. Make it firm and clear that there is no fun until after work is done. Give him/her rewards when he/she does well on homework or tests. Nothing big, just a small token for doing a good job and getting their work done. You can search study habits on the internet, and will also get a lot of good strategies. Like make sure it is in a quiet room, no disturbances, and things like that. Good luck.
402593
I'm in the same situation as you.  I think you have to take matters into your own hands, but that requires motivation.  And the lack of motivation is where I'm stuck at right now.  Sorry, this isn't much help.  But I just want to let you know that there are other people who have the same problems.
577261
I am a school kid and i know exactly how your son feels, i have no motivation towards my work whatsoever. The only way i can focus on my work is to have everything taken from me. It's not that i doon't want to learn it's just i can't be bothered. So what i would do is ask him if he is actually bothered about his future. If he says he is then tell him that you will take everyhting that he thinks might distract him because then you will be on "his side" but if he says that he isn't bothered about his future then take everyhting away from him anyway so then he will do his work from pure boredom. Dopn't forget to stick to what you say otherwise he won't pay any attention to what you say in the future. I'd also use the technique of restricting the days which he can go out with his friends on, maybe to days at the weekend as usually during the week nobody wants to go out anyway so restricting to weekend wont really affect him but he will think it will and then he will want to work so he can have the rest of the week off.
816736
Set a time limit for being online. Then, read a book; put a puzzle together; write a letter (on paper with a pen/pencil) (GASP), find someplace local to volunteer, learn to cook (or if you know how already, cook), and then there's the always famous, if you're really bored and tempted by the internet; CLEAN YOUR ROOM. Ha ha! Hope this helps, I also have a 13 yr old, his addiction is video games. Good luck!