I had a friend that beat her children & used an excuse of spare the rod, what did she mean and I am no longer?
596213
sadly your friend is the victom of a good christian upbringing! jesus brought the word of love and pease. man, invented a religion! in this religion a bunch of wackoos got together and dreamed up a lot of sick ideas and made them law. so for 2000 years people fearing eternal damnation have followed these sick laws. now that people have out grown the need for self punishment, a lot of these sick ideas are now criminal offences. for example, your freind was referring to the old addage, "spare the rod, spoil the child" this means you can beat the hell out of your children and feel good about it because," GOD demands it!"  now days, IT'S CALLED CHILD ABUSE!!  a hopfully  the bitch will get turned in and have to sit her ass in jail or at least have her kid taken away from her! don't you just love that old time religion?
957180
You did the right thing. I am so sorry that you were put that abuse. \n\nStay on the right track; and do not allow his words of "sorry" etc let this man back into your life under any circumstance. He is unstable right now and anything could happen. \n\nAlert any and all neighbors if they should see his vehicle around to contact the police. I know that sounds bad; and you don't want your personal issues hung out on the clothes line. But you don't have to give them a reason other than he is court ordered to stay away for serious reasons. \n\nThis man should not be allowed visitiation of the children unless it is supervised either. You need to protect yourself and your children around this man. I would get that in the works as soon as possible.\n\nHopefully he will get some help and this will cease. \n\nStop feeling low about it because you're allowing this man to continue to abuse you by taking on his issues. Be proud of yourself and thankful that you are alive today! Let it go and concentrate on your future. You are strong and I am so very proud of you. \n\nGood luck to you sweetie and God Bless.
305936
I'm sorry that you were treated so badly. I recognise the anger you feel. I've had the same experience myself and I know how much it hurt me. \nBest advice I suggest is do nothing. \nThis person has probably long forgotton about you. Getting your vengence on this person more than likely will not make you feel any better. If anything, you may even end up feeling a little guilt. \nThe things that happened to you were wrong, but its happened and you can't change that. It might help to find a way of dealing the anger you feel in another way that could maybe help others. \nI guess this may not be what you are looking for. All I can say is, its helped me.
632237
YOU ARE NOT WRONG FOR KICKING HER OUT HUNNIE, YOU TOLD HER STRICTLY THAT NO DRINKING WAS ALLOWED, AND SHE DISRESPECTED YOU AND YOUR WHOLE FAMILY. YOU ROCK BECAUSE YOU PUT YOU AND YOUR FAMILY FIRST. IT DOES NOT MATTER THAT YOU HAVE KNOWWN HER SCINSE 4TH GRADE...SHE WAS A BAD FRIEND...YOU OFFERED HER A HOME AND SHE DIDN'T TAKE THE MATTER WISELY! IT IS HER FAULT AND SHE SHOULD BE THE ONE COMING BACK TO YOU SAYING SORRY. I HOPE THIS WORKS OUT AND PLEASE KEEP ON BEING SUCH A GOOD MOTHER!
114650
Forgiving is to choose not to fight anymore, the forgetting part doesn't come automatically, it's a process, so don't beat yourself up.\n\nIt is perfectly acceptable to feel wary of them. Being betrayed by a family member is the worst kind of betrayal there is, because it's so unexpected.\n\nIf you have not discussed your feelings about what happened with your accusers personally, maybe you should. Be frank. You said the e-mail made you smile, it sounds like the wound is healing, that's a good sign. Take things slow! And be careful, Jesus wants us to forgive but He doesn't want you to put yourself in a bad situation. \n\nGood luck with your situation.\nAnd remember, you're not alone.
458045
well what you did was not easy  i too have done it but it want just your life that is suffering the life everyone thought they had is now turned up side down and the easiest way out is to blame you. I am so sorry this happen to you  but good for you that you  are not the victim anymore and your family will come around in time but the words we say be it what you say to them or what they say to you will remain as the biggest scar\nyou keep living your live with your head held high and dont think for a minute it was your fault. i would like to have contact information with you so i can discuss this farther i can really help .I will keep you in prayer and your family. i dont know if they will let me post it but it is JLSJSTEPHENS@YAHOO>COM
627501
Know your reasons,and make sure they are FACT. Do not end a friendship over miscommunication. It is the hardest thing to try to earn back.If the friend really did a dirty deed, remember then, he or she was not ever a real FRIEND to begin with.FRIENDS are people you can trust with your life and the lives of your children. You give unto others' and they in return will give back to you without question in some way!
678215
First, find out what it is she really said before you make any assumptions.Second,if you didn't do anything wrong and she really is calling you a brat then she's not worth your time.As for the spider thing...that's most likely the reason why she's not going over anymore.
995575
As I understand that your intention was for the sake of your mother and taking care of your mother is something that God advises and rewards you for.\n\nYet, you made a mistake to threaten another person, and you with the good heart you have can go appologize to that man and this will be rewarded by God too and surely your mom who did not do anything that God would not like will be happy for you because you are obeying your God through asking for this man understanding and forgivness for what you did and I am sure he will understand.\n\nAlso, let it be a lesson that Good cause would always need to use good means to achieve it although sometimes it is really hard and I feel sympathy with you and Let us pray that God bless your mothers soul as well as yours.
9523
Yes, a woman with whom I was a really good friend (I will call her Jane) just turned on me and almost refuses to talk to me now. We don't live near each other anymore, so it's not as big a deal now as it once was. But I have no idea what I did or said to turn her against me. I am one who has really good relationships with people and long-term friendships. So this really took me by surprise.\n\nJane and I used to spend hours together every week and a lot of time on the phone. We were both members of the same professional association. I saw her there and she was really rude to me like I had offended her in a big way. \n\nI am still mystified by this situation and it took place nearly eight years ago. I was told, by a mutual friend who asked me about the break up that Jane had done this in other relationships. That made me feel a little less confused, but I am still saddened by the loss of what I considered a great friendship.
229637
I'm sorry about what happened to you and your family.  \nI can't understand why women put up with abuse, either.  I can only imagine that it's because those men have a power over the women's minds.
622934
well, did the person who gave her a flower do something to upset her? If so, thats probably why she tore it up. Ask the friend why, and tell her she should forgive the friend.
797220
There are people in this world who are unhappy and they take out their misery on others. These people have an urge to make others unhappy as well. I think Jacky was trying to hurt someone because she has been hurt. I agree with you. It is totally unnecessary to be offensive and you are just a nice person who happened to be in the way. Try to move on and be happy and not let this offensive behaviour upset you too much. There are a lot of nice people out there too.
315104
here's a story about the kind of person i am. there was this guy that abused me...and my friends were very angry about this fact. they arranged to have both of us "out back" of the building when i didn't know, nor he, what it was about. all of a sudden they come at him. i opened the door and told him to get away. THAT'S the type of person i am. i love people. i love my enemies. i pray for them. i will stand for anyone to the point of physical pain. and i have.
267595
I know how you feel. There is one fellow from a long time ago who was tormented as a child as I also was. One time, our collective tormentors goaded us into fighting one another, promising to end the torment of whichever one of us won.\n\nI have felt badly for years that the one I should have had the most empathy for was the one I ill treated, not our tormentors. \n\nBut does finding that person and apologizing make them feel better - or you? I asked myself that question, and realize that it would be of little benefit to the person I feel accountable to - it would only assuage my guilt. All I would be doing would be bringing up a long-past horror I know I don't care to remember. \n\nIf this person was ever going to forgive you, chances are they already have. Don't make them relive something simply for your benefit. Unless you were actually planning on reestablishing a relationship with  this person, take your lumps privately. It is the only decent thing to do.
769626
Wow...you tried to fix a nice surprise for  your friend, you went way out of your way to do it, and now she's mad at you.   you must feel like she kicked you in the stomach when you were expecting a hug.\n\nFirst, give your friend some time to get over her shock. Just totally give her some time and distance away from you.  You won't be able to reason with her anyway for a bit.   Hopefully in time she'll begin to realize that both you and her daughter had only good intentions.  Some people (like control freaks) don't like surprises.  But really, I think she's the one who should fix this mess.  You were only trying to do them both a favor.  You could try telling her this when she's ready to listen.  It probably wont' be very long before she regroups.\n\nHey, you sound like a great friend.  If she doesn't appreciate you, I am sure many others would.\n\nblessings,\ncryllie
1107917
I think you all are being too harsh on her.  Parents should spank their children, spare the rod; spoil the child.  However, what did you spank your child with to leave bruises?  I was spanked as a child and I grew up with an understanding of right and wrong.  I have never been arrested, I graduated college, and lead a normal life.  I work with children and I can tell you a million stories based on CPS and spankings.  I think they should let parents be parents!  Children need discipline, but no one deserves to be abused.  I am pretty sure you will be able to get your child back, they usually make parents undergo classes such as anger management.  I am sure you will do whatever it takes to get your child back. I hope your family works through this and overcomes it.  God bless you.