How can I help my friend get over his fear of commitment?
613210
i understand how he feels i still have a fear when it comes to relationship .with others  i would not make plan to do anything i always told friend or family when they wonted to plan something i don't know we will see what I'm doing when you decided ed to go call me and i tell you i i f i can come or not. i had to learn shit happen and some times thing s don,t go as plan , you take the good &the bad .thier iss a lotthats not good or bad it 's both youjust have to take it and deal with it to.
805748
I totally feel you man. My best friend is Mormon, and I had to go through it... but the bottom line is that if he's your friend, he'll be chill with it. Just tell him at some point when you guys are just hangin out, and the mood is right. Just tell him that you're still you, and that your relationship wont change... just don't hit on him... that'll fcuk things up...
266219
Tell him exactly what you are feeling.\nTell him you would like to still be friends but have concerns.\nTell him why you are concerned & explain quite simply that this can not continue to happen.\nTell him how it makes you feel and how you would NEVER do that to him...\nAfter saying this, listen to his reaction & proceed however you think is best.\nMy guess is things will change for the better, but this is up to you to decide. (If he really was a good friend, give him a chance to redeem himself and make things good again.)
159092
I think he is afraid of the reaction other people would have if he told you that. Some people really do talk when they hear about relationships. Summing it all up; can it be fear?
14486
If he has additional signs of commitmentphobia, dump him yesterday.  If he arrives awfully late to meetings with all people and has no other signs of commitmentphobia, start arriving 2 hours late to your dates with him or come on time with an interesting book and enjoy your boyfriend!\nLogan\n(For a list of the usual signs of male commitmentphobia, check the web or buy "Men Who Can't Love".)
764061
Ask her what she is afraid of. Tell her she doesn't have to go to the extreme to hide anything from you. She can be totally safe and honest with you. You have to build a bridge for her to see and focus on.It's all an act to hide her pain and suffering. She wants desperately to be heard and acknowledged.She won't change until she sees it and acknowledges it. Be a friend and let her know she doesn't have to fake a good deal.
987916
If it's safe where you live, take walks with him outside in the dark.  Let him see that it's not only safe, but beautiful.  Spend time indoors in the dark with him, maybe listening to music or just talking before he goes to bed.  He needs to see that you're not only not afraid, but even comfortable in the dark, and maybe he will come to fear it less.  \n\nBut a small nightlight is also a good idea while he's learning to overcome his fear.
673654
Don't rush things.  He's probably scared of losing a friend.  Give him time to sort his feelings out and then let things take their course naturally.  If it's meant to be it will happen.
20906
I'd go with your gut instinct on this one - if you honestly feel that he is playing around with you, and he won't commit, then chances are he's either afraid to commit or never took it seriously in the first place. If you feel that you're up to the challenge, direct confrontation may be the best thing. Tell him that you want the honest truth, but be prepared to live with an answer that you may not like.
128542
It just takes time. If you have been given reasons not to trust it is hard to "unlearn". \n\nIf you feel that it is unfounded, you may need therapy to assist with getting beyond the issue or underlying cause.\n\nEither way, your best bet is to be open and honest with your friend. Explain the issue and ask for help with working through these difficult times. A good friend will be there and help you.\n\nGood luck!
1051561
my friend is in this situation... the best thing to do is tell him, it may be hard but otherwise everything you do... will lead him on.  until you tell him bluntly you dont want to be more than friends he will always be hopeful and then hurt every time you like flirt with another guy etc.  really regardless of how hard it is, you need to tell him so that his healing can begin and you can go on the road to becoming the great friends you were before the whole thing started.  if you did decide to try things with him just remember that it could destroy your friendship and it sounds like you dont want that.
28473
It seems as if you need to clear things up with yourself first.  The only way to get someone to believe that you are ready for something beyond your comfort zone is to believe it yourself.  It seems as if you are scared of these certain things that are holding you back, but the only way your husband will see that you are confident about yourself and that you are not scared is to fix yourself first.  He will see what you bring foward...If this is really something that you want to be comfortable with but at the same time is a hard thing for you to do, sit him down, tell him you love him and that you don't want "this" to be the reason your marriage suffers...tell him you are willing to work on yourself and if there is something he can help you with to make you more comfortable, let him join in, that way he can see the progress.  If this is your husband you shouldn't feel the need to hide behind anything, he should be the only one to know you with no hidden masks.  Please, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and jump into life for you,,,everyone else will follow your lead!
41548
He loves you as a friend and is so scared of losing that friendship if he crosses the line and you reject him.Find a way to make the first move on him in such a way to make him think he made it.
617392
he probly feel that he made a mistake and is scared that he doent want to lose you as a friend
82001
My goodness he is persistent!! Apparently your responses during the past four years have not been strong enough to discourage him.  It is really hard to have a guy friend, because in the back of his mind is: "hey, there is always a chance..." in the back of your mind is: "hey, if I get desperate.."  (everyone needs a backup plan...sounds mean)If he's putting his life on hold waiting for you, it is only fair to firmly end the hope for him.  The candle is still burning....time to extinguish it (unless you are interested).
995758
Keep your eyes wide open. Try to keep from becoming passionate about the relationship. This is difficult for most. Allow yourself the detachment of deep emotions. I found that this enables us to see the traits of a man, good or bad...We need to see them through our "friendship eyes" Think of it this way...what would a friend do? If he reacts like a friend repeatedly,then they begin to gain our respect and trust!! happy hunting....
1187607
Check this out?\nGuys are not ready for a solid commitment as fast  as we are and to just keep it real they will do us the way we let them do us.\nIf you let him continue to put restrictions on you as far as seeing other guys all the while he is seeing other females then he will just keep doing it.\nYou Need to just let him go seriously unless You want to keep putting up with this guy stuff.\nI will say this and leave it:\nIf you want to keep having sex with him but see other people do just that and let him know it, example;\nWhen he comes over and you have done the do, just let him know "Hey you have to go home now because I have a prior engagement to go out with a friend"\nIf he actually have a problem with it, just tell him, You have made it clear that you want an one on one relationship with him but he do not, so it's time for you to move on to find someone who wants to be serious and one on one.\nIf he is serious about you but afraid of commitment then this will help him to make up his mind.