Whats the best line you have ever heard?  The worst?
597743
Haha, i dont use lines.  I have figured the best way to get a girl is to be straight up and honest with her.  I may be wrong, but i think girls are about sick of pick up lines.  Am i right ladies?  lol
1089943
A doctor tells a man "I've got bad news and I've got worse news.  Which do you want first?"\n\nThe guy says, "I'll take the bad news."\n\nDoctor says, "You have 24 hours to live."\n\nGuy says, "What's the worse news?"\n\nDoctor says, "I forgot to call you yesterday."\n\n\nThat's hilarious.
944166
Dont really think this is a good pickup line but it always cracked me up..\n\n"Those pants look great on you but they would look better on my bedroom floor"\nHahahahaha
531896
hey,ur rhyme joke was good!\nsee mine-\n1)son telegramed,from hostel-\n"no money,no fun,ur son"\nfather replied-\n"how bad,too sad,ur dad"\n and ya,i rate urs as 10 out of 10!\n \npls have mine as best answer,cause i dont have any!
1167601
funniest? i ran/ripped into my screen door at my sister's open house and it's on tape.\n\ncraziest? i heard that a guy left his son in the van for an hour while going to a strip club and told his son that if he got out, monsters would eat him\n\nworst? there are a lot of bad things in the world, it's too hard to pick one.
793949
WHAT THE CRAP ARE YOU SAYING!!!
804818
That was funny.\n\nRead this one\n\n"There is always one" : Call centre conversations\n\nThere's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. Thisis a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".\n\nActual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.\n(Now I know why they record these conversations!):\n\nOperator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; May I help you?"\nCaller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."\nOperator: "What sort of trouble??"\nCaller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."\nOperator: "Went away?"\nCaller: "They disappeared."\nOperator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"\nCaller: "Nothing."\nOperator: "Nothing??"\nCaller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."\nOperator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"\nCaller: "How do I tell?"\nOperator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"\nCaller: "What's a sea-prompt?"\nOperator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"\nCaller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."\nOperator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"\nCaller: "What's a monitor?"\nOperator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.\nDoes it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"\n\nCaller: "I don't know."\nOperator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"\nCaller: "Yes, I think so."\nOperator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall. Caller: "Yes, it is."\nOperator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"\n\nCaller: "No."\nOperator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."\nCaller: "Okay, here it is."\nOperator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."\nCaller: "I can't reach."\nOperator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"\nCaller: "No."\nOperator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"\nCaller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."\nOperator: "Dark??"\nCaller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."\n\nOperator: "Well, turn on the office light then."\nCaller: "I can't."\nOperator: "No? Why not??"\nCaller: "Because there's a power failure."\nOperator: "A power...................................... A power failure?\nAha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"\nCaller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."\nOperator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."\nCaller: "Really? Is it that bad?"\nOperator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."\nCaller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"\nOperator: "Tell them you're too f*%king stupid to own a computer".\n\nBYE - Imtiyaz
407368
Wow, that has got to be one of the worst post-coital lines out there.
448639
Worst is- Ive lost my number can I have yous.\nBest is- Can I borrow a light cause its pretty dark in here sorry I just looked in your eyes.
793734
Your'e amazing, the most amazing person I've ever met. Your'e beautiful on  the inside aswell as the outside and seeing you again is messing with my head.\n\nThe funniest line I've heard one guy say, was (looking at my chest) "have you got a license for those!"
625490
"One time I fell off my bike and broke my ability to internally monologue"\n"Will you stop putting your labels on me?!"\n"What a tumultuous question!"\n\nthis was almost fun...
140902
i agree with the last person! pick up lines suck! come on...guys can be more creative than a pick up line..sheesh.
1111244
This one is on the front page at eBaumsWorld.com: \nMike goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this great big huge guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, "7 feet tall, 350 lbs, 20 inch penis, testicles 3 lbs each, Turner Brown." Mike just faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big dude kneels down and brings him to, by slapping his face and shaking him. He asks, "Are you OK??" In a very weak voice Mike says, "Excuse me, but what did you just say to me?" The big dude says, "When I saw the curious look on your face, I just figured I'd give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. "I'm 7 feet tall, weigh 350 lbs, have a 20 inch penis, my testicles weigh 3 lbs each, and my name is Turner Brown." Mike said, "Oh Thank God!!! I thought you said 'Turn Around!'"
426981
LMFAO! Ha ha ha, thats the funniest think I've heard all day. That reminds me of this 'Poopy Poem' I read once. Ha ha ha. I am so totally The Scamp! Ha ha ha!
305269
Me: Dude, I heard we will all be slaves by 2007.. Isn't that scary?\n\nFriend: Yah I heard.. (trembling)..Who was it they said is gonna rule us?\n\n(background effects..dum..dum..dum..dum..d... drum rolls)\n\nMe: The... (nervous)\n\nFriend: Say it!!\n\nMe: The... (nervous)\n\nFriend: (shakes body of me) Say it!!!!\n\nMe: THE TELETUBBIES.\n\nFriend: No! (surprised to what he heard) No.. (cries suddenly, then kneels) Nooooooooooooooo!!!
874857
This had me crying when I first heard it...\n\nAn old man is riding in a lift with two glamorous women. One woman takes a perfume bottle out of her bag and sprays her neck. She turns to the other woman and says, "Romance by Ralph Lauren...£150 an ounce."\n\nThe other woman takes a perfume bottle out of her bag, sprays herself, and says, "Chanel No.5...£200 an ounce"\nThe lift stops and the doors open. \n\nThe old man steps out and lets off a huge rumbling fart. As the doors close he looks back at them and ays..."Broccoli, 49p a pound."
1019180
What do i think the worst job is?\n\nIrritating people that can't answer questions,\n\nAnd have nothing better to do but be sarcastic!!\n\nRing a bell?