Is it possible that you've been married 14 years and suddenly your husbands tells you he never loved you?
595664
I don't believe that for a second.  No way you can stay with someone, put up with everything for 14 years and not having feelings.  He's just made/making a choice and the easy way out for him is to convince hisself he doesn't.  He said that for 2 reasons, one to hurt you and the other he's trying to convice hisself.  He'll figure out that he was wrong later, but it will be too late, if he was to want to fix it.  Sorry about your problems.
294958
I have been married twice. I divorced my first husband, not because he was unfaithful. In a nutshell, he was unwilling to work on our marriage. After many years of trying, I finally gave up. \n\nMy second marriage is very happy. We've been married for 20 years. My husband is the dearest person alive! He is my lover, friend, caregiver/nurse, companion, confidant, teacher, and more. \n\nWhen we married he had 4 grown children and a 14 year old. I had 2 sons, ages 7 and 12. He is a great father to them! My ex was a negative influence in their lives. He loved them, but was not a father to them. My husband was retired when we married so he was the parent that was home with them when they came home from school. He attended all their extracurricular activities, took care of them when they were sick, took them to the doctor, disciplined them. In short, he was their dad. My eldest son credits him with being the reason he chose to marry a woman with 4 children and become a step-dad. Both my sons believe their lives were better because I divorced their dad. They loved him (he passed away 2 years ago) but know the kind of person he was. They know how much my husband loves them and has always been there for them.\n\nMarriage is a commitment between a man and a woman to share everything the future brings, the good and the bad. It is a promise to be together until one partner dies, no matter what. Does it always work? I'm living proof that it doesn't. I'm also living proof of what two people can create if they are committed to making their marriage work. Certainly, we have had our problems, differences of opinion, arguments, etc. But we have never lost sight of our love for one another. We work on our marriage every day. Our love continues to grow. We honor and cherish one another.\n\nI generally don't give such long answers, but the more I told you about my marriage the more I had to tell. \n\nGod Bless!\n\nP.S. Below are some links to scripture from BibleGateway.com.
723161
No, it doesn't mean you don't really love him. Some of the things my husband does embarasses me. If I think he could be a 'better' person, then I suggest to him about changing. Sometimes I just live with it. :-)
18643
No, but I married my best friend.\n\nI think it's pretty special to have built a very strong friendship before we had any romantic interest in each other.\n\nWe've only been married for a little under 2 years and we are raising 4 children together - 3 of mine from my previous marriage & our baby. I am sure that it is our very strong relationship that helps us get through the difficult times.
451651
Married for 15 years and we still tell each other where we are and what we do and No they shouldn't get mad but they always will but they will get over it and they still love ya . It's good that you let your spouse know what you are doing just in case something bad happens or what if your spouse wins a million dollars wouldn't you want to know right away? There's always a what if and it's better to know and to be prepared than to wonder what the hell happened.Just in case it's your last chance to say I love you.
529036
Is your husband a lot older than you? It seems like you might be so attached to him, sure because you love him, but because he's the only real man you've known. You've been married since you were fifteen? I had posters of boys on my walls when I was fifteen ya know? If he treats you good, if you love him, if he loves you, there's no reason not to be with him. But don't think that you HAVE to be with him or that he's the only one you could love or would love you back, because there's A LOT of men out there. You just need to think about what would be best for you AND your kids, you should definitely be thinking about them.
903582
Leave him, if he never told you he was married then he was probably never really serious about you to being with and more than likely doesn't plan on leaving his wife.
498772
ABSOLUTELY!!\nMy husband and I have just celebrated our 27th anniversary married and 28th together. The love we have today is much more than what we had on our wedding day. Our relationship is stronger and deeper than ever because of the 28 years we have been through together. You always hear the saying "through all the ups and downs", well it is so true. There were so many times during the first 5 years that I could have said "see ya". But I didn't. We had our first after we'd been married two years, he lost his job shortly after she was born and jobs were real hard to find so we had no money. We had to rely on family and other means to survive. But we did. I had faith in him and I had my Faith in God that we would get through. \nThere were many other financial hardships through the years that should have torn us apart and would have torn other couples apart, but we refused to let that happened becaused we loved each other and had faith in our marriage. We worked together. There was one time around our 17th year that we separated for awhile but I am too bullheaded to let him throw all that time away. So with some fight and work we saw what we needed to do and what we had done. We took each other for granted.\nOur marriage today is stronger, more passionate and devoted than ever. We have a greater understanding of what each other needs--time for each other and for ourselves. Be there for each other but know when to step back and stand beside each other for each other against all others no matter what.\nHe is my heart and soul. He is in law enforcement and I send him out every night with a kiss, a hug and I love you. The rest is in God's hand. I know there is always a chance that he may not come home or he may get seriously hurt. I take that chance because I love him that much. I can honestly tell you this much. If for some reason I would lose him to his job or by nature, he will be it for me. There will be no other in my life. That is how deep he is in my life.\nSo yes, there is long-lasting relationships and deep abiding love. It takes two to make them and lots of hard work every day. But the rewards are worth every minute of the life you will have together.\nI hope this helps
361475
If you 've truely been unhappy for 15 years, I'd say you've been married for 14 years too long.  However, my initial response was that a marriage is very much like a business partnership, but you are right that it also needs love and romance to flurish.  \n\nWhat concerns me is the apparent infatuation with this other guy.  You must have found something appealing about your current husband that you wanted to marry him.  And something worthwhile to stick it out for 15 years, my gosh.  I am concerned that once you leave your husband, which I think you should, the novelty and infatuation with the new guy will wear off.  Living with someone is always much different than "dating" them.  \n\nI think you should leave your current husband only for issues you have with him, not because you think you may have found a better replacement.  It would be really sad to leave a good provider to find out the new guy is not up to par in some bad ways.  Get out of the marriage first, then take the new relationship as it comes.
247284
I am going to live with my boyfriend soon. And I would not want to be married before having lived together for at least a couple of years.\nBut hmm 14 years, that is a long time. Maybe he is just one of those millions of people that does not value the institute of marriage.
1183224
If I was married...NO...NEVER.
625859
Yes. Three times and I married two of them. One got away. The first one I married and I didn't really realize how much I loved her until she cheated on me and we got divorced. She was a mix of things good/bad, bithc/angel, honest/liar. I never really ever figured her angle out. She lost her way. I feel bad about things went between she and I. The past is the past.\n\nThe second, I never married her or even had relations with her, but I suspect that I loved her the day I saw her walking down the street. I remember it almost like it happened yesterday, but it was almost 20 years ago. I said that I had to meet her, I met her, we went out on a date, and it never worked out like I wanted. We became very good friends but she never felt the same way about me. \n\nThe third, is my friend, my wife and the mother of my son. I love her dearly and would do anything for her.
172705
yes..i have ..one regert..there was a boy..who is behind me for two years..i never loved him..after relation of three months i told him..this..but he still want to continue as friend..then love happened to me..n i had a break up after six months...this guy then helped me out ..laid a hand for me..i thought i must give a chance to this relation...so i given..literally..we hanged around..i always said him i love u bt i never felt him...n the day i again fall in love..i left him without reason...he runs behind me..again but this time to say final good bye....i personally feels i done bad..i used him..wen i needed..n may be becoz of that today my husband left me without reason...
1178340
Well, something has changed. I was in a crazy horrible relationship for way too long, let me help you out. First, have you tried talking to him about this?  Regardless....No one and I mean no one has the right to make you feel second class. No matter how long you have been together. It is sad and scarey when things start going down hill after years together but just because you have invested time is no reason to stay and find out if he is really going to hit you. Love doesn't behave this way. My guess is that he is doing something wrong and all that hiding is making him guilty and he is projecting that onto you. It is a pretty standard jackass tactic. You are better than that.....I wish you the best in making a decision that is safe and fulfilling for you. We only get one life.
1171558
I did on my first husband years ago because i was young and stupid and because i did not feel loved by him at all. It was a wrong response on my part though and i regret to this day every doing that to him and the marriage even though the marriage was bad. I should have went for counseling and help instead of running away and being with men. Two wrongs do not make a right and needless to say that marriage ended in disaster and my husband took his own life. Trust me it was not worth it at all and the pain was horrid. I would never do that again and now that i am married to a wonderful man and husband i would never even want or dream of ever doing this to him and my marriage. I learned my lesson and never want to make that mistake again.
1158420
If your husband has never said that it's too much, then I'm sure it's just fine. Congratulations on finding someone that you love so much.
1043821
if they are married - NEVER