non custody parent  wants to buy 12yr old girl cell phone. should i?parent answer only.?
598021
if its going to be used as a safety precaution why not, what if they miss the bus or something
998121
I have a 16 year old daughter who does listen to me. There are times  when  I think she not listening until she comes home, tells me about her day and some situation that happened and she says " I did what you told me to mom and you were right, it worked" " I know you think I don't listen, but I really do"  I've always been pretty open with my daughter, I don't sugar coat anything. I've always told her she can talk  to me about anything . Teaching my kids to be honest, non judge-mental, to be themselves, to have their own opinions and to voice them, to have morals and values and  that everybody makes mistakes and its ok as long as we learn from them, that nobody is perfect and not to have expectation of others, expectations lead to disappointment.  Expecting your child to do well in school is one thing, expecting your child to be an all-star basketball player is another. Teenagers as well as children in general look to their parents for approval and discipline. Do you have respect for a person you can walk all over? Neither do teenagers! Teens need a parent not a friend. If a parent constantly gives in, their teen knows they will not suffer any repercussions no matter what they do. Parents need to put their foot down when their teens have done something wrong. Temporarily take away whats most important to them , the phone, computer, friends, dances etc.etc. This usually gets their attention. Talk to them and listen as well. Don't be afraid to talk to them about sex, drugs, alcohol etc. I've told my daughter  what can happen, what does happen. If her friends pressure her into trying or doing something walk away and let them say what ever they want about you. If a "friend" is putting pressure on you, then obviously they were not your friend to begin with. A friend would not do that. I've dealt with other parents looking down on my parenting methods, these are the same parents who's teens cannot talk to them about anything because they would flip out, the same parents who think if you don't talk about it then it doesn't exist. I feel, I'm being realistic. If a teenager wants to do something bad enough, they will find a way. You can't lock them in their rooms or ground them forever. Help them understand for every action there is a reaction. Throw out a what if...ask them what they would do in a given situation, then give them the possible outcomes. Do it over and over. until it sinks in. You might feel like a rotten parent, but its worth it. Its a cruel world and teens need to know just how cruel it really is!
1017572
I think that it depends on the amount of trust you have in your child. The things that go on in the world today, I feel that most children should own a cellular phone. Just make sure that you explain to them that the phone is a privilege, not a right, and that you expect them to use the phone wisely.
807174
Seems a little strange that you would post that. Agree with first answer seems like more than a question.  Did you just want to tell the world that she lives with a 39 year old...well you just did.  Hope if she finds out that the 39 year old is not an attorney or knows one because this could constitute harassment. Just a little friendly advice.
130520
Well I was seventeen when i got my first cell phone my parents were like yours they did not think i needed a cell phone in fact my dad thinks i do not need one now and I am 19. I think if you really need one its good for you to have one because if you have one you will have a way to call home or call someone when you are out somewhere. Trust me having to find a phone is hard as hell to do i hated when i had to do that. Explain to your parents your reason for wanting a phone. There are plenty plans out there that would be good for a 14 year old like yourself. My sister is 15 and my parents want let her have a phone unless she has the money to pay for one. So if your parents have to pay for your cell phone bill just wait until you are able to pay for one yourself. My parents have never had to pay for my cell phone bill. I had to wait until i got a job to pay for mines. but if you are dire need of a cell phone just explain to your parents why you need one.
916384
What a cheek......If you buy what they have asked you to you will be setting the standard for the future!!\nBuy what you want to buy for your niece, and spend the amount you wish on it.\nSomeone needs to tell these parents that they are being a little presumptuous !!!
596978
I think she should go. tell her to give you a call on her cell phone if she has one (if not, let her hold yours) My mom was very protective of me growing up. I never went unsupervised until I was about 16. I think she'll appreciate the freedom!
63834
Trade in your child's cellphone for a model that does not support internet protocols. If you can't find a dealer who will do this, try ebay for cheap used phones.
1164107
Most cell phone companies offer a free long distance, hence why I chucked the idea of having a home phone long ago. I could sit on the phone for hours with my brother who at the time lived out of state (now he lives in another country) and not pay one cent. If your plan is like this, she'll see all those calls, but you guys won't be charged for them. If it isn't, level with her. She'll probably be pretty upset with you for running up a big bill, but tell her you're sorry and you would like to make it up to her by paying off the bill. At 14, you're probably too young to get even a mall job, but you could earn your keep by cleaning the house (no doubt, a giant help to Mom there) or babysitting. It will show her you're responsible enough to own up to your mistakes. As for the boyfriend she doesn't know about, let me ask you this...do you think it's really healthy for you, a 14 year old with no mode of transportation, to have a boyfriend that's not only 17 but also lives so far away that you can't have a real relationship? And how do you know he is the age he says? Maybe he's some 40 year old perv! Gross! Have you even met him in person? It's not so wise to invest so much time (and so much money if your cell plan isn't like mine) on someone you know in such a superficial way (meaning you don't know each other in 3-D). I'd try to meet guys in your area that are around your age and try to forget about this guy. Your mom probably won't like this one bit. If she asks who you were talking to, you really can't lie. My dad would call the numbers I had to make sure that's who I said I was talking to. Fess up now before you get yourself into more hot water that you can't get out of.
121164
I know you're not going to like my answer, but you really don't need a cell phone.  I'm in college, and I don't have one, nor have I ever had one.  My parents don't have one.  I don't think you realize how much it costs to have one.  Do you want to pay $40 every month?  You probably don't have that kind of money.\n\nAlso, you really need to respect your mom.  If she's said that you can't have one, it's not because she wants to be mean to you.  She's doing what she thinks is best for you, and that doesn't include a cell phone.  When you start driving places and have a job, then I would say it's reasonable to have one, because then you can pay for it.\n\nCell phones aren't toys to have just because everyone else has one.  They're an expensive tool, and unless you NEED one, don't get one.
587772
Give them all cell phones, like they do on My Super Sweet 16.\n\nJust kidding, personally I think you shouldn't give out goody bags because they're just so cheap and the stuff you get in them are like pencils and candy. Take it from a fellow 13 year old, your friends will have fun anyways. I don't think anybody really gives out goody bags anymore, so don't worry. If you want to give out something, I would go buy each of your friends a disposable camera where they can take pictures of what they want to do, without having your parents saying "okay girls, gather around". I went to a party yesterday where we all got our own cameras and it was fun. Hope that helps.
1088903
Please do not allow a child to cost you the love of your life.  I know this is difficult...children go thru their growing pains, and this one sounds so confused right now.  With the background of her mother, this child needs stability and sanity in her life, and to feel safe.  She may fight her father on this, but it would not be in her best interest to live with her mother, it's an unhealthy environment for her and like you said, she will end up becoming her mother.  If her father has legal custody, fight for her!  Keep her in your home, no matter how bratty she gets, it is in her best interest.  Please, all of you go to family counselling...and help give this child a future that does not involve drug abuse.  Even with her rebellion and rudeness, you know that for her to leave your home is not the best thing for her.  She's a child, she cannot make her own decision in this matter.  Once she's 18, then she can decide.
519815
If it were me, she'd be giving me the money back one way or another.  I would let her know exactly how disappointed I was in her, & she would have to EARN my trust back.  If you & her father are still on the same page where parenting is concerned, I wouldn't hesitate to get him involved, either.  At the very least, he should know about this behavior, because who is to say she didn't pull the same stunt on him, & possibly got $3,000 out of the deal?\nI don't believe the statements made that you shouldn't scold her.  She's still your child, & should be held accountable for her actions.  You are still her parent, no matter how old she is, & in a situation like this, she should be disciplined.  If she doesn't want to give you back the money, get the police involved.  Don't let her think she can run over you with threats of leaving & never talking to you again.  Your job is to make her respect you & to be a better person, not to have her like you.  Don't be her friend, be her parent.  If she needs the money for something she isn't comfortable discussing with you, most likely she's doing something she knows is wrong, & of which you'd disapprove.
1140746
From my experience, coming home late or breaking curfew was a major way of testing my parents trust. Considering your ages, I am surpised that your parents are so restrictive. Ask yourself, what is this 'bad' that they think you're doing? Did your parents come from deeply religious families? Were your parents also restricted by their parents? What about her parents? It may not be fair, or make a whole lot of sense these days, but that could explain some of their methods. Do you or your girlfriend have troubled pasts, maybe trouble with the law? Did you ever have a truancy problem with school? Don't think that I am blaming their behavior on you, I just want you to think of all  possibile reasons. It almost sounds like you two live a bit far away from eachother, and that might explain why you're only allowed to see eachother twice a week, and talk on the phone for only half an hour a day. Have I nailed it yet? No? Okay, parents may not seem to make any sense some of the time, but they are your parents. Like it or not they have say into your relationships. The more you show respect for them and their wishes, usually the more trust they'll have for you. So if you're considering sneaking around after dark or anything like that, don't try it. Chances are you'll get caught, and just imagine how often you'd get to see her then? Probably not at all. I know this is a hard time for you both, you're almost legal adults, but until you turn the magic age of 18, you just have to bite down and endure this. You will get through this, just be patient with her and your parents. I am going to assume that talking with your parents wont make much of a difference, but there is nothing wrong with trying. Ask them what it is that they fear so much, and do your best to put that fear to rest. Assure them that you intend to follow their wishes, and do so when you're out with her. If they see that you're true to your word, the less likely they are to shorten the leash. I get the feeling that their fear is your sexual activity. It is my personal opinion that you two are at the ages when your sexuality is your business, however a parent will feel like your business is always their business. You can be 50 years old, and they'll still consider you their baby. Being that your sexuality is your business, I hope you wont mind if I give you a piece of advice: protect you and your girlfriend and use a condom every time. Anyway, you will get through this, I promise. Good luck.
1119397
Get her riding lessons or a week at horse camp.  For my daughter's 13th she got a portable phone.  She can walk around the house with it attached to herself with a microphone and ear plug thing so she can do dishes while talking on the phone.
162015
I dont live in your state, but maybe able to tell you a few things..... If your girl is now 13 yrs old, then when going to court, she maybe able to speak her mind to the jugde.. Tell the judge that when you gace your parents temp cust. that you planned on getting her back when the time was right for yourd daughter, and for you... Always put your girls name first when tlaking to the judge... Tell him that you have a good place to stay, and have an income...And that you are able to care for her now. And that she has told you she wants to live with you. Go get the papers from court and start filling them out. Dont tell your parents that you are now filling. Let them find out when they get served.... That way you have a fighting chahce at getting her back. Catch them off guard. Have your girl write a letter to the judge telling him why she wants to live with you now. And that may help too. Find out from your county court house what is the age that the judges litsen to kids.. in cases like this... Bring anyone that is on your side to show that you area ble to care for her now. Just having to prove that you are a fit mother is all you have to do.
221419
It sounds reasonable that you would want to give your rings to your daughter when she is old enough, but there is no reason that you should have to keep wearing the rings. I know that if I was with someone who was still wearing their wedding band from a previous marriage, it would give me the idea that they were still in love with their ex, and that would not make me very happy. Although that's probably not your motivation for wearing them, you have to admit that it would look a little strange to your boyfriend. I think the best thing you could do would be to put the ring up in a safe place somewhere until your daughter is old enough to wear it. Honestly, I am a little confused as to why you would want your daughter to have it if it wasn't from her father, but I am not completely familiar witht the situation, so I will leave that alone. Just do what you think is best. If you are willing to take the ring off your finger and put it up somewhere, I am sure your bf would be fine with that as long as he didn't have to look atit everyday on his sweetheart's finger. If not, and he insists that you actually sell it, maybe he's not the guy for you anyway. Good luck and God Bless.