should kids come before marriage which is right?
594723
There is no right way...it's just the way you feel about it. If you feel that you can love and take care of a child with out a partner, do it that way. If you feel the need to have a family complete with a mom and dad, then find someone who will be there long enough to provide. You don't necessarily have to get married...you should just have enough love in your heart to provide for any kids.
1124831
The number of children a family has should be decided(for the most part) by the couple.  It should be a mutual thing to raise the children, so it should be a mutual thing to decide how many to have.  But they should take into account things like finances and emotional ability to handle children.  The only exception that I see to this is cases where the parents are incapible of caring for their children or are abusive to them.  In those cases, the government should protect potential children from the harm such an upbringing would cause(by not allowing them to be conceived in the first place).
634579
You have to choose between your kids and your fiance. " A woman's first social duty is towards her own family". Plan it out with the concurrence of your kids.Put this question to them.
15265
I too say put the marriage before your kids.\n\nYou need the following:\n\n1.  The right priorities, such as spouse first, then kids...\n2.  Respect for your marriage vows.  Take your vows seriously and live them everyday.\n3.  Listen.  Listen to what your partner says.\n4.  Don't assume you know, ask questions.  Never assume you know the motives of another person.\n5.  Speak clearly, directly and respectfully.\n6.  Set clear boundaries of what you will and will not do.  Boundaries are about what YOU will do and/or tolerate.  Enforce your boundaries, because if you don't, they turn into resentments.
930523
I don't think that 'marriage' should come before sex; I think a true, loving commitment should come before sex.  Marriage is just a piece of paper or a ceremony that represents that, but a lot of marriages are made without that commitment.\n\nPeople can have casual sex and do well, but generally, having sex first before a relationship and dedication can muck things up.  That's my two cents!
139571
Yes, you should wait until you are married.
232364
you dont get married just to have kids. you get married because you found someone you want to share your life with and making a committment to do so forever.
1104126
It's sex before marriage. Some people are for it, some against it. I believe you should try before you buy.
966010
Listen to your heart man ....life is all about taking a decision , its only time that tells later if your decision was correct one or not ..... \n\nListen to your heart ..ask yourself .... and do it if you feel its right. Also there is never a right time to get married and have kids.
647331
How about umm....MARRIAGE first? It's not just a piece of paper. He needs to MARRY you and make the public legal and moral commitment to you before he starts talking about you having his baby. Your relationship doesn't sound stable. Take all the right steps to be sure the two of you will stay together before you bring another PERSON into the picture. A baby isn't just a thing. It's a real person with needs and feelings. Kids deserve TWO parents that love them and will be there for them. Of course it doesn't always work out that way but shouldn't we at least TRY to seriously make that happen to the best of our ability and not just half as s the situation? NO WEDDING RING = NO BABY.
199872
I personally think it depends on how old the child is.  I did live with my boyfriend when my child was 2-3.  We eventually broke up and no harm was done b/c they didn't remember the situation much.  I am now dating someone new 8 years later.  We are even talking of marriage but I refuse to live with him until we are married.  If something does happen and we break up it will definitely send the wrong message to my child.
539071
You'll just know. Besides, no one is quite READY for marriage, it's like having a baby--you have to know you want it and then plan for it. When that's in place it's trial by error, so to speak.
288881
Yes....wait till you get married........lot less problems in life.
543876
I feel very sad about this as a child needs a secure environment to grow which i dont think unmarried parents can justify. i want my kids to grow in  a safe n secure family as environment surely affects a child's psychology. Children are a God given assignment to parents.Its our duty to give them all the love they deserve n i feel that only commited parents can ever justify that.So what i think is that people should get married and then only have children. its good for both kids n their parents.I had a happy childhood only coz my parents were married.It counts a lot.\n\n\nWhy do u people who answered associate marriage with bitterness n hatred that would ultimately lead to divorce??
1129729
It is true that people should always be careful and consider their circumstances before they decide to have kids. Nowadays it's not like how it was back in the olden days. Now the world is over-populated and heading down the drain, it's getting more and more expensive and difficult to raise kids. Back then kids were a blessing sent by God, the children helped out on the farm and did the work for the parents. Nowadays children are still a blessing sent by God but one should really ask themselves if its a blessing that they really want to have and can afford to raise.
591219
I don’t care what state your in young marriage is a bad idea.  You kids love a person one day, and then in a few months change your mind.  You’re not ready to deal with the same person everyday until you DIE.  Why do you think the devoice rate in the country is so high?????\n\nMarriage sounds so romantic until your trapped and no longer happy with your wife. \n\n Go enjoy being a kid!!!
379141
Ideally, marry for love and keep your beliefs, which are your spiritual selves, personal.  Regarding children, it's so very important that they not feel pulled or pressured.  From day one in the relationship, look at all possible belief systems, including atheism, and show respect for them.  Freedom to believe whatever is right for you is such a precious freedom, that children should never feel compelled to take on their parents' religion.  Be certain that this is the basis of understanding between you.  Then, marry for love.