i need help i dont know if i should leave my husband he doesnt help me out at home with anything?
606397
there is such a thing as verbal abuse sounds like that's what you're getting from him.tell him straight up help or get out.
604066
I actually just told my husband to leave me alone the other day,but he asked me what was wrong and I said,'hormones...just leave me alone'. He did though and I felt better after having some time to myself. I think your husband needs to realize that no one is happy all of the time. We all need time to ourselves and it is good for you and good for the marriage to be able to take this time. As for having a big blow-out about it...I would've walked away. I don't take that crap anymore. It isn't worth it to me to talk til I'm blue in the face,trying to explain 'why'. I shouldn't have to. An argument doesn't really get you anywhere. I tend to wait until things have settled down and then have a conversation about it and find out what he is feeling then. I gave up a long time ago on trying to justify myself to him. We actually have a better marriage this way. Good luck to you.
795224
Stop helping him out financially. Financial help is something that you should dedicate to a husband, not someone as transient in your life as just a boyfriend. Save your money and your dedication for someone who is worthy of it! Have a good, happy life, sweetie!
1025223
I think you already know.  You are not happy in this marriage, your husband doesn't care about your feelings at all.   You don't see any way to get him to change and you don't want to live this way.  I don't like to recommend divorce but if all you say is true than I think that would be the best thing if you want a happy future for yourself.
983837
Find a support system. Though a husband is supposed to be part of it. Get out there and make friends, people who share your interests and viewpoints. On the husband, make mentions of whats going on in your mind. He may feel as insecure as you do about living in this new place and may not know how to comfort you if he cannot do it for himself. Most people keep things inside and queitly seeth. Its rare to find people who can communicate well in a relationship. Find someway to open the lines.
728313
I completely understand how you feel.  I hate being anywhere but home, it is an uncomfortable, anxious nagging want to escape pressure that you have to control and act like you don't feel.\n\nTell your husband, and his family you have other plans.  I say tell his family so he does not try to explain in a way they will not understand.  Maybe going every other time will make it easier for you to deal with.  Tell them you just need sometime to work on things at home...like your peace of mind, yeah, don't tell them that part. :))
348941
I think it is your husband fault. You can ask this question to him and try to get his help. If hi can not help you, wait for a while. Time is a medicine for the most of the problem:)
491687
He may be going through problems and does not know how to deal with those problems.  He may be trying to work those problems out.\n\nHave you sat down with him to try to find out what is going on in his life?  Maybe he is having problems at home that you are not aware of and it would help him to talk about those problems.\n\nI would suggest that you don't go into a relationship with him again if he is still dealing with the same problems.\nInstead, be there for him, but if he keeps that wall between you, then there is really nothing you can do.  He is going to have to work it out on his own.\n\nGood Luck to you both
1116318
Try to talk it out... if that doesnt work then leave. Remember he has to make changes for himself not for you only!!!!!
805533
Its natural for you to feel this way and what will happen to you. And no he doesn't need your permission, same as if you had decided. Look hard cold facts here you were both not living a marriage you even said he's never home and during the day you didin't see him and  no intimate relationship this shouldn't have come as a shock to you. Humans have needs and wants I know your need is the kids and a roof over your head and money in the bank but he's more than a bank machine . He too needs something and he wasnt' getting it. Sorry to say but this marriage was over a long time ago.  You should now start thinking of your own happiness and future and let him find his happiness you only go around once. Why would you both want to stay in a loveless marriage it wouldn't be good for either of you. I know some women dont' need a lot of sex and as long as the man brings home the bacon there happy. But for the man he's not. So its time to move on and let him find his happiness just as you will . \n\nAnd what will happen to you . well you will become more independent go out and get a job and pull up your boot straps your starting a new chapter in your life. You can do this. Happens every day.\n\nSorry for your marriage but if people arn't happy why stay in a loveless marriage.\n\ngood luck
655616
Ummm...you need to come down off your high horse and realize that having a higher education does not put him beneath you, but that you are beneath him for even thinking this way.  I say leave him.  He deserves better then you.  My education is higher then my husbands but who cares.  He works hard and loves me so thats all that matters.
372640
Was he that way before you married him? If so, why would you expect it to be different now?\n\nIf he wasn't, then--as said above--you've probably run rampant at home and he doesn't feel the need, or is trying to "balance" the situation. Could also be med/psych reasons too.
1138966
Girl you need to do whats right for you and your kids.If you feel like he's not taking you seriously then you have to figure out if its really a problem for you if so you need to let him know this is how you feel, and if he's still acting like he don't care then girl get up and do it.I know he's your husband but don't let nobody stop you from doing something you want to do.Sounds like he trying to keep you on lock..
335908
Discuss the problem with your husband, then together you just ask him to leave.\nIf he gives excuses and refuses to leave, pack up everything that's his and put it out front and don't let him back in. I'm sure he'll find someone else to mooch off of.
176264
If there is some type of abuse, get away.  Your safety should be your #1 priority.  If this is the problem, and your spouse seeks help for his problem, then I would say that you should not consider ending the marriage.  Seek counseling and hopefully your spouse will seek counseling.  However if your spouse doesn't make any changes, then cut them loose ASAP.  \n\nNow if you been hurt over something else, talk to your spouse and seek counseling together.  If they are not willing, get it for yourself.  Work on making yourself happy and understand it is O.K. to have strong feelings for you spouse.  But it may be the time for you to have strong feelings for yourself.  That is what counseling can help you with.\n\nWhatever you do, take care of yourself.  It is the most important thing you can do.  But don't rush to end a marriage just because things just don't look right.  It takes to and if your spouse is willing to make changes, be willing to look deeper into your problems.  It can work out.\n\nGood luck and I'll pray for you\n\nWT
149996
Move out. Tell your hubby it is me or mommie. no one needs to exist where they are slaves to thier inlaws. I cook I clean I work my butt off sounds a lot like cinderella except there will be no prince charming to help you out.
743861
the marriage is over. the 2 of u have lost all respect for each other. just move on. if u stay u could end up doing more harm. think abut the children. they have to see this behavior going on in the home. so just move on.