why is it that people expect gay people to tell people that they are gay when they introduce themselves.?
612927
i think that perhaps it is because gay rights are so much in the news. when i was growing up, it wasn't discussed except behind closed doors (hence, coming out of the closet?). society is, in my opinion, in the midst of a revolution in this area and so it is a "hot" topic. your sexual orientation is really none of anyone's business, and should not be the brunt of jokes, however, i think it is an unfortunate byproduct of gaining your rights. being a parent of a gay child, i understand your irritation and, perhaps a tad of the pain. being a parent of a gay child, i can only say that society has come a long way in the last several decades in this area. sadly, there are still miles to go. for me, it is one of the burdens i feel my daughter will have to bear. i feel a sense of gratitude that she is content with herself, but know that she has made a difficult decision as far as society is concerned. standing up for yourself and your rights does not guarantee an easy road in any situation. choices come with a price, and for the gay community, as with most minorities, people judge on the basis of sexual orientation, not the whole person.
187962
Be creative about it.  A lot of people start by introducing themselves.  I started mine with a quote from a poem.
18498
ASK THEM !!! Most people that are gay but dont say anything about it do so because they think people will judge them . As long as you act mature about the persons answer (whether yes or no ) the question should soon be forgotten .
50694
It's assumed because most married folks, or folks with kids are straight.  There are some who aren't.  So if someone incorrectly assumes your sexuality, politely correct them & move on with your life.  It is no big deal what you are.
713327
People may not agree w/ the gay lifestyle, however if they got to really KNOW some gay people the ignorance surrounding their beliefs would be wiped out.  Gay people are just like straight people as far as I can tell.  Live and let live, why do people care about what others do in the bedroom?  Is it a sin?  Who are we to judge or care?  I can think of many other "sins" that humans commit that far surpass being gay if being gay is a sin.
481399
Why are we always trying to label ourselves as one thing or another. Other than for marketing purposes, there is no reason to believe that the word homosexual means anything other than an action. It should not be a description of a person. We are far too complex to fall in these types of categories. People have tendencies for many things. Accept who you are and fill your life with satisfaction. Society has created categories for people. My opinion is that there is no one category for me.....gay, religion, or anything like that. \n\nJust a thought, \nI'm Joe
403734
People are so ignorant. We should all be allowed to be who ever we are. Those who call gays names like SISSY are really failing GODS test. They will be answering to him in the end, and they won't like what's coming to them believe me....
948645
They are scared or do not think it is natural. Not me, though, I love gays! I actually do, lots of gay people are funny and nice, maybe because theyve been through a lot (plus the gay boys are sensitive and can help me with my shopping!)
850136
If you look at the homophobes, many are doing it out of fear. I suspect that most of those who spout anti-gay or homophobic insults are in fact gay themselves, but will not admit it. Just think about how many scandals there have been lately where someone who is vociferously anti-gay has turned out to be gay themselves!
561433
What a great question! This is something that gays and lesbians wonder all the time. Can someone tell if you are gay or not? Some people believe there is such a thing as "gaydar." Gaydar is a sixth sense that gays and lesbians have to distinguish gay or bisexual people from heterosexual people. \n\nIs gaydar for real? Some people will swear it is. Personally I think that we gays, lesbians and bisexuals develop gaydar as a type of survival intuition. We need to be able to suss out who is and who isn't gay because hitting on the wrong person could be big trouble for us! \n\nYou will find some people who are convinced they just can't tell who is and isn't gay--even ones who are gay themselves. And then there are those people who fool everyone--even the ones who think they can tell. \n\nTo answer your question: Can people tell if you are gay or not? My guess is that they just sense that there is something about you that seems open. Maybe they are just hoping you're gay. You may even be giving off signals that you are not even aware of because now you ARE open to such kind of flirtation.
690483
tell them you're gay.
677617
Since most people are straight, I think that is assumed unless told otherwise.\n\nWhy people care about someone's private life is beyond me, unless there the only way they can feel good abot themselves is by dtahinking that they are better then people that are not straight.
326606
C. It's not a hetero thing. I know some pretty mouthy, opinionated gay men too. Some people just want to interject their own opinion on others. Like I am doing here. LOL\n\nThe significant difference is that I don't expect you to agree with me.
3251
Well, if you catch them engaged in a sexual act with a person of their same gender then that would be a good sign. \nI almost cringe to even answer that question because I do want to perpetuate stereotypes of homosexual people and I do not want people to think that there are real "signs" of being gay as though gay people are so different. Bottom line, it's probably none of your business. If you are a family member or are concerned for a friend's emotional wellbeing then maybe you could ask them. But if they are not "out" then you should not tell. Sexuality is a very personal thing and having a sexuality that is different or considered "wrong" by  mainstream society or that person's family can be especially painful. Again if you are a family member or a concerned friend then offer a sympathetic ear and your ability to be sensitive and keep a secret. Otherwise, concern yourself with  more pressing matters.\n\nRemember when addressing this that any sexual prefernce is not chosen. People are born with it. And even if people believe it is a matter of environment and not a matter of biology then know that it is still out of that person's hands. Please remember to be kind and understanding of all people and their sexual orientations.
511923
OK, all these people who say you are going through a phase, that's just them trying to "save" you. Every gay person I've ever talked to believes that people are born gay, which means you could probably tell at your age. Also, I've heard of people knowing that they were attracted to people of the same sex when they were even younger then you. People are coming out younger and younger now, this is due to growing acceptance, if you come from a place that does not accept gays, then i am guessing you are pretty sure. I probably don't need to tell you all this. Back to you question, do you know any other gay people? They can give you advice and understanding, also don't underestimate your close friends, and i hate to say it but you might find girls are more accepting then guys.
243806
because many people are scared of what they dont know and anything that isnt in the 'norm' they tend to become ignorant about. like if they go near a gay person they might become one or catch something. if only they could open their closed minds a bit and see that gay people are just like the rest of us they have hearts and they have feelings too. we can only pray that one day we all be treated as equals.
109183
probably not.  Most gay men dont want to state their orientation because of fear.  Fear of hatred disrimmination and even being kicked out.