i think my in-laws hate me what do i do?
610844
Girl they mexicans? F*** them, you not married to them. And you don't need them i guess so tell them what you think and let your husband know why you did it. Keep in mind don't cuss 'em out just let them know in a round-a-bout way that you not playin'. Need some help email me at hot_gurl102@yahoo.com
1058787
unfortunately, my husband's mother is the same breed. I just avoid the woman at all costs. fortunately, my husband agrees, but I don't know if yours will. \n\nI doubt confronting her would help, if she is as childish as my mother in law, but you could try talking to her, tell her your daughter feels left out and it hurts her feelings. goodluck whatever you decide
303092
Mothers are often jealous of a son's relationship with another woman since it usually means they are no longer #1 in their son's eyes. On another level she is also jealous of the attention your father-in-law pays to you and she is making sure he doesn't come to like you too much! \n\nSisters often resent their brother's girlfriends and wives, regarding them as "new daughters" that take their parents and brothers attention away from them. Kind of like sibling rivalry.\n\nThese women will settle down in time once they realize you are no threat to their relationship with your husband or their husband/father. Encourage your husband and father-in-law to include one or both of them in the conversations or activities that are making them jealous. Don't let either of the men make comparisons that put you in a better light and provokes their jealousy. For example, if your father-in-law compliments your cooking, then looks at his wife and says, "why don't you ever make that," then you should make some comment about her best cooking to keep her feelings from being hurt. You will see lots of little things like that if you watch for them. Try to smooth them over, and just be the best person you can be. Hold your temper! It will get better in time. \n\nIf it doesn't you will know that you tried your best and just avoid them as much as possible to prevent disagreements and try to ignore the hurtful things they say and do. Your husband will take a hand if they disrespect you too much when he knows you are doing your best to get along with them.
875777
"meaner than a snake." That's funny! I sympathize with your situation.  I sure wouldn't want to go there. What's the worst thing that could happen if you take a strong stance with your husband and tell him that you don't want to go this year?  Why not invite the old coot to your home? Or just skip going to the relatives this year and celebrate the holidays with your husband and children.\nAlso, I would have a problem with a mother-in-law who doesn't have anything nice to say about you or your son and the fact that your husband let's her get away with that nastyness. You don't deserve to be treated like that.
694372
My mother in law didnt like me either. She said it wouldnt last a year. Well its been 32 years and we no longer speak to her because she pulled some rel nasty stunts on our children. I say stay with him and ditch the mother in law too.
966367
Talk to her and tell her that she is annoying, if she does not care than leave her alone!!!\n\nI have a sister-in-law that is annoying and we have tried telling her but she will not own up to anything!!!!!\n\nSome people are blind to their faults!!!
1073750
I am in a similiar situation.\n\nMy someday soon-to-be sister inlaw is very irritating to me.  She is Very judgemental, opinionated and I wouldnt be surprised if she hates the idea of us someday getting married.  So, needless to say, I really understand your situation.  Now what to do... I will give you the best advice I can, even though I havent yet solved my own situation.   \nFirst of All ~ Always remain focused on your man and on your relationship with him.  He is the one you are with.\nAt family Events ~ Try finding someone else that you can hang out with and/or relate to.  Or, spend extra time in the Kitchen helping with food preps or other busy work.  Be Helpful.  If she is mean to you then she will look like a real loser.  You will look great cooking, helping etc.\nHope these tips help.  Best wishes to you.  Be yourself I am sure that is good enough.  OH & don't worry too much, most of what we worry about never actually Happens!!!
817359
It actually sounds like your in law problems aren't as bad as some folks.  On his side, if it's pretty much the little sister that doesn't get along with you try developing a relationship with her, take her to lunch, call & chat with her if possible.  Maybe you guys just need to find some common ground.  If his family feels intimidated by your outspokeness, try toning it down around them a little.  Sometimes it can be a real learning experience to just listen to other folks.  It's probably just different communication styles.  Again, just look for as much common ground as you can find.\nOn your side, I think your mom needs to get a grip.  Your husband sounds like he's good to your son - what does your mom want - for you to hold out for the guy whos in jail?  She needs to learn to accept your choice.  Best wishes!
48491
Sounds like a dysfunctional family.  Try to deep the children away from her as much as possible.  There has got to be an underlying reason for this kind of hostility.  Any idea what that could be?  Does your husband have anything to say about this?  I wish I had some profound words of wisdom for you, but I am at a loss.
944297
I was in a similar situation where I lived with my wife's family for a while before we got married.  Her parents are amazing, but her brothers were the laziest bunch of a**es I'd ever laid eyes on.  I was the only person cleaning the house, mowing the lawn, shovelling the snow, washing the dishes, etc, etc.  When in their house, I always felt that being the outsider, it was an obligation of mine to help out whenever possible.  \n\nIt's tough to say in your situation as you don't mention where the problems are coming from.  My wife was always worried that I would leave her because of her family, but I told her that I was with her because of her, and that her family would not change my mind, no matter how frustrated / angry they made me.  We moved out of the house shortly after the wedding and I was much happier for it.\n\nMaybe your bf feels that he has no privacy, is trapped in a situation where everything he does gets scrutinized, and can't really relax or be himself.  When I go home, I want to sit back and do anything I want, but being in someone else's house just doesn't give me the flexibility to do that.\n\nYou need to talk to him and see what he is thinking.  If you don't know why he's upset/unhappy, you need to find out.  Maybe moving out is the only way to change things for him.  It did me and my wife wonders.
971576
Sounds like your husband comes from a rough family and still has some of their bad habits. I wouldn't try to get his family to like you. It's not your fault they are mean. It wouldn't matter how perfect you were, they are just not that good at being nice to others. If I were you, I would remember everything your family has taught you about being a good person and trust that. Just be the best person you were raised to be and maybe your example will help soften them over time. Maybe not. But at least you can be strong knowing that you are doing the right thing even if they are not. Do not judge yourself by their standards. They obviously aren't experts at being decent, so don't take what they say so seriously. Try thinking of them compassionately as children who were not given the right tools and don't know how to behave better. Most of all, be kind to yourself, even if others are not. Talk kindly to yourself and think about all your good qualities. When you are feeling hurt try to be patient with them. Remember, they can only hurt your feelings if you believe what they say. Make yourself strong and calm inside and you'll be OK. Think positive! Good luck to you!
843177
You are a good mom and my heart goes out to you, that's horrible.  Well, you have to pray for starters, ask God to take care of this for you.  And LISTEN.  That's the best thing you can do for those kids is let them vent, let them have a comforting place in your home......sounds like you provide that already so good on you.  That woman needs some serious couselling.  I'm afraid she won't change unless she decides to OR unless everyone involved can clear their head, be ready and strong, and STAND UP TO HER TOGETHER.  She's picking on her daughter because she can, that's what bullys do.  It will be hard but if you all stand together and tell her her ways are unacceptable, she may get worse for a while or she may not speak to anyone for a while, but she will be forced to think long and hard about it.  From there, the choice is hers.  She does not have the right to cause this much grief to all of you and she needs to decide to stop, or spend the rest of her life without you all.  Your son and daughter in law are blessed to have you, good luck.
445194
No one should hate it is corrosive to your own health. Mothers in law tend to respond to their children as though they never grew up. This feeds over into the spouse and creates resentment. If you can find a way to see past this it will eventually get better for you.
908144
Catch her putting in a camera on one of your own.  Then , send the tape to all your husband's relatives.  Once people know that others know, they usually drop their invasion of you and your life.  It's like the dirty little secret is out.\n\nNow, there is another problem here -- you are really upset and feel invaded by this.  Since your husband is so unresponsive, can you see a counselor?  You need to work out your feelings, since in the end she is still your mother-in-law and the grandmother to your child -- and will be forever, no matter if a divorce occurs, etc.  \n\nNaturally, your mother-in-law is sick and needs help.  I'm hoping other family members will realize the extent to which she is sick and will intervene.  I'm also hoping others will help your husband see reality.  As often happens, there are plenty of folks who put up with bad behavior, to the point of denying its existence, because the love and feel loyalty to that person.  It's called cooperating with the illness.  You need to walk a simple line ... without being critical and judgemental, state repeatedly that she is sick and needs help, that this is not the behavior of a rational adult, that there is free counseling through the church, etc.  What you are trying to do by this is get people to agree with you, so it's not a case of choose a side.  Instead, you are asking them to choose to help her.\n\nGood luck -- I feel for you and wish I had better advice for how to handle this.
267799
I have had 2 mothers in law.  I was equally nice to both at the beginning.  I wanted to make a good impression.  The 1st one HATED me.  But then her son was a spoiled cry baby and she never wanted to give him up.  He's 40 and still lives at home.  The 2nd one LOVES me.  Her son is a MAN.  He treats me well and we have a lovely family.  I think it depends on several things.  Whether the mother has any intention of ever giving up the son.  Whether the son has enough spine to stand up for his wife.  The wife needs to accept "helpful advise" in a kindly way.  Say "Thank you, I'll consider that.  I appreciate your help".  Treat your mother in law how you would wish to be treated.  I think it comes down to what type of person she is.  I thank God for my new mother in law.
414149
Avoid them like the plague!  You're outnumbered.  If you MUST be with them, respect them and show them by example, how NORMAL people would react.\nEVERY family has a couple odd-balls!
1171875
For one thing, I'd talk to the ex-in laws. They need to refuse to give in to her everytime she's not getting her way with you.