20 reasons a child is bullied?
488985
One important factor is that there are some cruel people in the world who enjoy watching others suffer.  If there weren't any bullies, there wouldn't be any bullying.  In identifying the reasons why some children are bullied, it is important not to be seen to blame the victim.\n\nHowever, given that some children are bullied and others not, there are probably factors that make some children more vulnerable than others.  Many people who have been bullied, cite the reason as being the thing they were taunted about.  For example, someone might say that he was bullied because he wore glasses.  If he is asked if he was the only child in his peer group who wore glasses, it often turns out that there were others who wore glasses but were not bullied.  I would conclude, in such a case, that the glasses were not the real reason for him being bullied.\n\nFrom my observation, an important factor is how a child reacts when taunted.  In any social group, there is often banter, when people tease each other humorously.  Some people are better at taking a joke than others and will respond to a humorous insult with humour.  Others (especially sensitive children) will get visibly upset.  The bully, being a person who enjoys watching others suffer, might then deliberately taunt to get further reactions and the bullying progresses from there.  A bully will often claim to be surprised at the accusation of bullying and might say, in his defence, that "everyone teases everyone else".\n\nThis sounds almost innocent but, of course, it is not.  To tease someone who doesn't like being teased in order to enjoy watching their reaction is sadism.  Furthermore, the bullying can then progress to being much more than humorous teasing.
986461
There are many reasons why people bully. Often because they are very insecure in themselves. Sometimes they are angry or upset or feel that they don't fit in. It may be a way of showing off to peers and looking tough and important and in charge. People who bully others in one setting may be getting bullied themselves in some other setting, such as at home or school. Bullies may be scared of getting picked on so they make sure to do it first. If they don't like themselves they may take it out on someone else. Sometimes they think it will make them more popular. Sometimes they do it to get attention. Others might be jealous of the person they are bullying. They may just want to make others afraid of them. It sometimes makes them feel braver or more important or better about themselves.\n\nThese links should help.
1063245
This girl is being a bully and needs to be confronted about it.  Whether it is you and some other people, or maybe a teacher, but the way she is behaving is not acceptable.
85205
Hmmmm .... be careful about some of the advice yu have been given here.  Some of it is good ... do be assertive, but your friend is probably not strong enough to fight the bully physically ... bullies don't pick on kids who are stronger than them.  Bullies don't go away.  It is true that bullies are cowards, and tend to back down when people stand up to them, but bullies also seek revenge.  I don't know how old you and your friend are, but this problem needs to be dealt with.  Unless bullies are stopped, they tend to get worse and worse, not better.  If this is happening at school, most schools have someone you can go to so that some adult will know about what's happening and can begin to stop it - a guidnace counselor, a teacher youtrust, the principal, someone.  Can your friend go to his parents and tell them?  If the bully has actually attacked your friend, go to the police.  The bully can be charged.  This is not a laughing matter.  No matter what the bully has said about not telling anyone, TELL.  Here are some well researched tips on dealing with bullying:\n1.  If you are bullied, TELL.  Telling is not being weak or being a coward or tattling.  It is helping to protect everyhone from that bully.\n2.  Tell someone you trust - teacher, counselor, parent, some other adult.  You CANNOT handle this yourself. \n3.  Do not retaliate or get angry.  This could make things worse.\n4.  Respond evenly and firmly or say nothing and walk away.\n5.  develop good strong friendships and support each other.  Bullies tend to pick on kids that they think don't have many friends or kids thye think others won't hlep.\n6.  Act confident.\n7.  Try to stay away from places the bully will be if that is possible.  For example, take a different route to school.\n8.  Avoid unsupervised areas of the school.\n9.  Try not to bring expensive items to school that might attract the bully's attention and that he might try to take or break.\n10.  To gain confidence and feel stronger and feel that youcan take care of yourself, enrol in a self-defnece program if one is available, or a martial arts program or something like that.  Self defence programs teach you some very good skills, very quickly.\n11.  Join a group, such as Scouts, a cadet program, or something like that, so that you have a special group of friends.  \n\nGo to the website www.bullying.co.uk/ which has lots of information for parents and for kids about bullying and about some things you can do.  I think this website might really help you figure out some good positivbe things you can do to deal with this.\n\nI hope this helps you.  Good luck with sorting this out.  Don't give up.  There is help out there. Take care.
946777
I am a teen and I have known people who have gotten bullied and my advice to them was to tell the guidance counselor and if they don't help (which is most of the time) then fight back because they are the ones responsible when you tell them.
194502
different phycologies work against different kinds of bullies. Perhaps he acts that way because at home, he doesn't get the attention that he needs, in which case you may try to counter-act his aggressiveness by showing an interest somehow, without giving him the wrong idaea. try asking him if he saw a movie you think is cool, or ask him if he's heard the new thing on the radio, or whatever. perhaps he acts this way because he hasn't run into anyone who'll stand up to him. try telling him-look, bozo-I'm not amused by the five-year-old baby routine, why don't you try something new like acting your age? or some other thing like that. remember, confronting people's negative behavior does not mean you are looking for a fight, only that you want them to get a firm message-back off. try a few different things, but try to be tactful.
791828
Stand up for yourself. No one deserves to be picked on. Let her no that you don't like it. If that doesn't work talk to someone you can trust and ask what for their advice. Like a parent, good friend, or counselor. Good luck and remember people who are bullies are just jealous people.
584462
Definitely do tell people about it! My daughter was bullied at school, and hated life until she was moved. Talk to the school, BUT if they do nothing, then go right to the state teaching board (not 100% sure how things work in the US) but if the school does nothing, go right over their heads. My daughter had proof that this other student had stolen her wallet, yet the school didn't want to know about it, or the many other ocassions.
86474
Talk to parents.  I know it's hard but try to ignore her by not being around her.  Sounds like she is very unhappy and becoming a bully.  Try to talk to her about how you feel too, but definitely let parents know of her abuse.
333461
i reckon that everyone has been bullied at least once in their life. i use to get bullied all the time when i was in grade prep to 4 for being asian. i was the only one being bullied because of my background. they use to do all sorts of ugly things to me. i was even dacked at one point. they woulds teal my money but rubbish in my bag and call my nasty names. they would even try to get me into trouble and the teacher believes them and did nothing to help me. it all stopped when i was in grade 5 and i somehow became popular. back then i use to hate myself fro bveing asian but then i realized that hey, im not the one complaining and bitching about being asian. i use to hate life so much i  wanted to die, but its part of growing up and its just somethig that you experience to learn more about life. oh yeah u answered my question about the paris hilton perfume, where did you read the info about the chemicas that attract the opposite sex? sorry this is the only way for me to contact you/
304761
Most childhood bullies often grow up to be wife-beaters, there's this kid I know, He and his dad dont like eachother very much, so the kid got revenge by trashing his dad's car. The kid also beats up other kids for no reason at all. Some bullies will grow up and still be bullies, others should straighten out and fly right. Like someone on a different question said before, a good Marine Trainer would straighten that bully out. Hardly any of them become successful in life.
1070106
Bullies become bullies because they start pushing in small ways, and become more and more aggressive, the more they get away with. I've also noticed that some teachers cater to the bullies, thinking that the attention of catering to them will satisfy their need for the spotlight. Just like animals after prey, they look for the lone souls, or the weaker appearing kids - the easy targets. That's how I think it starts; the parents of the targeted child(ren) need to step in and talk to the teacher for the class and, if that doesn't work, the principal. If there is a small group being targeted (one nearby high school was targeting Armenian boys), get the names of the other students and parents and report the bullies.
812706
1. A lack of parenting and discipline. A child needs to hear the word 'no' and have boundaries. Letting you child do whatever they want is only going to harm them in the end.\n\n2. A lack of personal responsibility. For example, all the ridiculous lawsuits - like the woman who spilled hot coffee on herself and sued McDonald's. It's a cheap ploy to get quick cash and it's nothing but pure greed. \n\n3. Selfishness. I think this goes along with the lack of personal responsibility. We're too busy being wrapped up in our own lives and being self-absorbed that rarely do we see acts of genuine kindness or altruism.\n\nIn my opinion, those are the three main signs of moral decaying society - however, I don't think society is completely doomed or anything. Every generation has, and will have, problems; I think it's a matter of changing attitudes and working for the good of everyone, rather than 'me, me, me'. :)
331718
I'm a teacher in the UK and very aware of bullying in my class/school.\n\nThis is such a big issue. I never suffered bullying as a kid, but I am suffering as an adult at the moment. What has helped me is a special phone line and friends that I can talk to about it. I have also told my union and human resources and they are giving me help and support.\n\nI try to instil in my classroom ethos a sense of respect and rapport for others. We use circle time to tackle issues and I am known as a teacher that will listen to both sides of an argument. I do not have favourites.\n\nThat is not to say that I do not have children in my class who are not being bullied. It is unfortunately a characteristic of human behaviour.\n\nRecently I noticed a child behaving out of character, very withdrawn and depressed. When I tried to talk to him he would not share his thoughts with me. Later that day I was told by the head that the parent had complained about her child being bullied. I was upset to think that: 1) one of my children was suffering. 2) neither the child or parent had confided in me.\n\nHe did confide in me later and we eventually were able to work on the problem.\n\nWhat I have learned as a teacher is:\n- that the victim needs support as soon as it is noticed, but it may take some time before they are ready and willing to face the situation/name names/admit there is a problem.\n- that the children need to have a way to communicate with you. They need to know that they will be listened to and taken seriously.\n- that the children need to know what true bullying is. They need to try to avoid the 'cry wolf' syndrome as it leads to parents/teachers/adults not taking the true cases seriously.\n\nIt does help to have an overt school policy that has a no tolerance attitude to bullying.\n\nIdeas that have been suggested in out school are:\n-playground buddies\n-school councillors/mentors\n-bully boxes (this tends to be abused)\n-assemblies about bullying\n-secret buddies (where the children pick someone's name randomly from the class list to be nice to them that week) At the end of the week the children try to guess who their secret buddy was. They suggest the name of someone that has been nice to them that week. Names that are mentioned over and over again are praised and rewarded).\n\nThere are no easy answers to this. We have to be supportive and patient with the victim and firm about what is acceptable behaviour and what is not to be tolerated.
350006
That's a tough situation.  I had a bully in 7th grade.  Ultimately, and it will be the hardest thing to do, but you have to tell an adult.  Someone that will listen.  A parent, or a teacher.  Someone that can watch your back and put the bully in his place.  I know it sounds like tattling or ratting on this person... but think about the news stories.  There's violence out there and you just can't keep quiet about it.
662268
I looked up the definition of bullying again and it refers to a bully as "a person who makes himself or herself a terror to the weak or defenceless"... interesting with the present fixation with terrorists - are they just bullies all grown up?\n\nIt was many years ago (about 40) when I was at school and yes, I was bullied, physically, verbally and emotionally - though it wasn't recognised then and came from both some teachers and other pupils - presumably because I was 'different' (there was no recognition of gifted and talented pupils in my day!).\n\nWhen I was around 35 years I was hospitalised after an attempted suicide and because I had a history of depression (from about the age of 15). During therapy it came out about the bullying (as well as my mother's attitude) and, based on that, I worked through the issues, went to university at last (I'd been bullied into believing it was not for me) and have now been depression free for 18 glorious years! \n\n(In all honesty though I have to add that my early experience seems to have turned me into something of a victim too. I ended up in an abusive marriage - yes, men can be abused too! - perhaps unable at some level to know who I was unless I was being bullied?)
1014742
I can tell by your rambling letter that you really could use someones help and support.  Why Montel?  How about getting an appointment with one of the school administrators. I would think children going through the stress of having one or two of their parents in harms way is stressful enough.  The kids then have to be subjected to bullying. \n\nDon't just storm into anyones office with all your complaints.  I understand your frustration.  Instead, write down in short sentences the facts.  For example, on such a date little Mary was kicked on the bus.  Or, little Amy had her lunch stolen.  Explain their fears of school  and how long this torture has been going on.  Wait a week if you do not hear anything.  Go over that persons head.  Make sure you know who and when you spoke to these people.\n\nIf you don't get results, I hate to recommend this, but maybe a big antiwar news show such as MSNBC or CNN may want to hear your story.  Good luck