Married for almost six years with one child. Neither one of us is happy. Any suggestions?
488464
Go with your heart. If you're not happy the sooner you split the better. My girlfriend, who is now pregnant with my baby, left her husband for me. They had two kids together. It's never too late to take a chance. We are deeply in love. However, leave him to be self-sufficient. Don't leave him to be with this guy who "doesn't love you enough to be with you"! That's just stupid. If he really loves you he would want to be with you. Otherwise he probably likes you and likes the sex, but doesn't really love you.
19374
Smile! right now... and then, sweep away the negative feelings... it will trap you in a vicious spiral. then we can talk of improvement. but first your attitude has to change. \nmy suggestions: talk to a good friend or a counsellor. next, start exercising. and that does NOT mean going to the gym! you can exercise at home, simply going up and down the stairs multiple times, or putting on some music that you really like, that sets your feet dancing, and dance away even while going from one room to the next! dance with your child! whatever be the age, toddler or older. that will make your child laugh and will whisk away any whiff of depression. play with your child in the park! (weather permitting of course!) you won't need a babysitter, or a gym, and both your body and mind will feel relaxed and exercised at the same time.
530200
Try having a baby...you will be 'upgraded' to a parent and that feeling will definitely revive all that jazz...it will also bring you two closer in body and soul.
883294
Yes...I was married for 18 years and the last few years felt like this all the time OR didn't want to be at home when he was there.  As hard as it was I realized it was because we had outgrown each other and weren't making each other happy.  We have since separated and are living our own lives.  We are MUCH better off as friends then we were as a married couple.
1151415
I was in almost the same situation, except the woman was my age.  I was married with children, and had to make some tough decisions in order to be true to myself and happy at last.  I no longer live to please others.  My advice to you is to make thoughtful decisions, then don't look back.  You can't make everyone happy all the time.  Good luck!
753022
You should have both settled on the children issue BEFORE marrying. There is no excuse for this issue to be surfacing now, shame on you both for not addressing it before you ever committed to each other.\n\nNow you are stuck. Since he does not want children and you do, the only recourse you have is divorce.
663853
I think you need to listen to your heart and make a decision. Don't stay married if you aren't TRUELY happy, it isn't worth it. Take some time to just think without any outside distractions. :)
1002425
Different strokes for different folks. My guy and I are as opposite as they come. We been married 13 years with four children. I hope you are as  lucky hun
1001270
you need to talk to her and explain how you are feelin about having another child...maybe you 2 could come to a compromise
612557
sweetie. you need to have a talk with him. don't continue to be unhappy. it's not healthy. ask him what are his plans as far as the marriage is concerned. hope things get better for you.
865531
If you are not happy in your marriage then this should've told you to look at the reasons why you're not happy and attempt to fix the problem.  \n\nLooking for the fix outside of the marriage isn't going to fix your problems.  I suggest you and your husband see a marriage counselor.
310016
You've obviously dedicated yourself to your spouse if you've been married for 35 years, so congrats on a very successful marraige. It's a perfectly normal part of human nature to reflect on what could have been. It sounds like you left a small part of yourself with this other person. There is no shame in remembering happy times with another person, but if it gets to the point of obsession then you should think about speaking with someone in the mental health field. If you aren't that far gone just enjoy your fond memories, while focusing on the good memories you have with your spouse.
548856
For the sake of your children and keeping your marriage, I would see someone.  This is deep seeded and if you don't seek counseling I'm afraid more "stuff" will push you into that black hole you won't be able to crawl out of and cause you to do something your family will suffer for later.  Go seek counseling BECAUSE you love your family.  I'm sure your husband will support you if he is a good man.  Best wishes to you.
456224
Talk to your husband and ask him what it is he wants to to change if he is being reasonable take his suggestions into account and try to implement them, but don't go out of your way to make him happy at the expense of your own happiness. You love each other so you can work though this to make it work.
887360
After 36 years of marriage i guess i am just about qualified to answer you. It is a hard road to travel.. believe me!! you have to work at staying married for this long. It is not all sweetness and light as there have been times when i have wanted to just pack up and go but i have a deep sense of responsibility to my family, even though our kids are all grownups now.My wife has no doubt felt the same at times. So the answer is..Think about what you are going to do, before you do it and consider what effect it might have on your other half. Tell her that you love her often and show it!! Flowers and little treats work wonders. Keep your lust alive as sex is important even as you get older. It is the best way of communicating your love for each other. Do not have secrets that might hurt the other one. Be truthful. Make time for each other, hold hands when you walk out together. Sneak a kiss in public. Look after each other and always back each other up. I could go on and on but i am sure that you get the idea. I am 61 and she is 56. We still sleep together  sharing a double bed. Like I say,love, lust, hard work and consideration are important as is being freinds as well.
269549
Please do not have a second child for the sake of your 1st child at the expense of your marriage.  With all you just said about your husband not really "being around" and your life dull with you questioning if he even loves you or if you even love him for that matter, you need to figure out your marriage first and either work it out (if that's what you both want) or dont.  You don't want to go having a child when you are questioning whether you even love the father or whether he loves you.  And having a child for the sake of your other child not being alone, is not the answer.  Your focus needs to start on your marriage b/c having a child should be a joyous occasion, one blessed by both parents and wanted by both parents, b/c otherwise resentment & bitterness with build up and then you will have a real mess.  Seriously, nurture your marriage, discuss both your feelings about the marriage & whether you want it to work out and if you both do, then discuss having another child & see if you both agree b/c you BOTH need to be on the same page on both issues.  Good luck!
658545
I'm so sorry you had to hear that. There's really no clear way you can cope and deal with that. Is there no more possibily of a reconciliation or anything? If that's the case, then just let her go. It'll be hard, but I'm sure you wouldn't want to be a hindrance to her happiness.\n\nPray for strength and guidance and focus on your kids. Be strong for them. \n\nGoodluck.