how can someone determine a 20 years' girl give up a shared love that certainly will not bring her happiness?
488557
u can't do anything now. She's 20 and still young(translate=to her mind, you cant tell her what to do). she's determined she knows what she's doing. All you can do is wait, talk to her as much as possible, tell her your feelings about her relationship without pushing it of course, or she will take it badly. Indeed the rougher you are to her, the more distant she'll be and do things that she might regret. On the other hand, if you're open enough, she will confide to you, and you will be able to grasp the opportunity to talk to her and reason her.
637179
Been there done that...whats up with the 23rd year...Its alot of years, you'll never forget the past, my marriage was great the first 20 years, but I could see the dis-interest building as the months after pasted by...and she too felt she was no longer in love with me, however I later found out her interests were directed toward another...suggestions..Seek marriage council advice, put forth a 100% effort to resolve such conflict, and if it doesn't turn out happily ever after, if there ever was an ideal time to be single , its with a good job, no mortgage and your child a grown adult...very simular to my situation...its was 2 yrs separated and 3 years since divorce and those conditions were blessings in disguise.
475318
It sounds like she's not passionate enough about anything (except maybe her b/f) to stick to it right now.  That's not at all unusual for someone in her 20's.  It might be good idea fro her to take some time off to explore the world and mature a little bit.  If she really wants to finish, she will.  If she doesn't, it's not worth trying to force her.  Also perhaps she has some ADHD or personality problems that are making it harder for focus and cope with school?  She should see a counselor.
776803
I think you need to be completely honest with your 10yr. guy.  What truly matters is whether or not YOU are happy.  So, I think you need to ask yourself that question. Do you want to spend the rest of your life denying your own happiness just because you don't want to hurt someone's feelings? Take a risk. Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the things that we think are meant to be.....really are not.  Miracles come in all shapes and sizes. Love has no definition.....so stop trying to look it up! Good luck to you!
97304
I think its time to let her go.  Age really shouldnt be an issue if you are both legal.  If she's hurt you too many times then i think its time for you to find someone who can love you and not hurt you.  And also think to yourself...  Do you "love" her or do you love the "idea" of her.
1186828
Zero or you are really young and or naive. if you have never loved anybody else how would you know that person is or was the "ONE"
295629
If they Love eachother then nothing should come in between that.Age is just a number.
297786
There is no "simple" answer for this one because it's a complicated life issue. For example, there are two other concerns you (and your former lady, too) may have easily overlooked.\n\nOne, although opposites attract in trelationshipg, it is "like-minded" people who experience longevity. Meaning, unless a person is like you, at the core, too many differences will need to be overcome. Eventually such a relatinship finds its natural path toward separation.\n\nIt does not seem that you and your lady are actually and really, two "compatible" personalities.\n\nTwo, regardless of the above, it still stands to reason that it takes an "inwardly happy" person to be able to appreciate and share the happiness of someone else. That is, you attract only what you are inside.\n\nFor example, it seems that you showed your lady in the beginning that you were not completely happy with "yourself." Upon her seeing this, she decides that it is truly better to be without you.\n\nIf you really want to get her back, and keep her, and do it all "successfully and happily," you must enhance your own inner self-contentment.\n\nHow do you achieve that? It's your decision, but you must do it because your peace of mind depends upon it.\n\nOne suggestion is "self-talk." That is, asking yourself bottom-line questions about what truly makes you happy... and developing the courage to follow up, even when the answer is "not" a positive one.\n\nOne of the very best ways to "give" happiness, is to "be" a a truly happy person, satisfied both with your talents and your inadequacies, as well, but still content with peace of mind, no jealousy, no envy, no resentment, and especially, not feeling sorry for yourself.\n\nIt truly sounds like, at that time, you were just too self-absorbed with your own problems, to be able to really appreciate her and give yourself to her without reservation on your part.\n\nIt's never too late to be a better person. And, once she recognizes this quality in you, she will want you more.\n\nHopefully, she will still be available for you, once you arrive at this point. However, even if she is not, you can take such wisdom and peace with you, wherever you go, and it sill boost your relationship's happiness in almost any circumstances.\n\nHope you find this helpful.
199268
There isn't some magic formula to mix together to make love occur.  It is developed over time, with lots of conversation, lots of time and plenty of caring.  Some would say if you have to ask, it isn't love...I'm not sure I agree with that.  I would ask questions like; \nDo you think you could live without them?  \nWould you lay down your life for them?  \nWhat would you picture your life being like without them?  How do you feel when you are apart?  \nWould you trust the other person with your life and secrets?\nWhere do you picture yourself in 10 years?\nDo you truly feel you know the other person deeply?\nDo the faults in the other person bother you too much?\n\nThere are other questions, but these answers should go sort of like, though not exactly like, this;\nno, yes, empty/lost, empty/lost/missing part of myself, yes (cause you will be), with the person...maybe children and a home, yes (you need to know the person very deeply, otherwise, how can you know if you really love all of them?), and No...they have no faults LOL (jk), but you should be able to overlook their faults and dwell on their positive attributes.\n\nGood luck.
794527
After 27 years your heart just doesnt close to that person, Maybe they couldnt live together, that does not mean that there is not some kinda love still. Even if its a friendship love or a respect love. Or a love because of children maybe born of the relationship There could be many factors to why there is still some "worry" attached into all that!
796331
A few more details would be nice.  Sexual love? Friendship love?  Long term?  I guess I can only tell you that only you can discover what the problem is then judge the effort needed to correct it and decide if it is indeed worth the effort.  True love is.  Anything else should be let go.
988302
If she truly loves you-she won't.  You stated that you love her alot and as long as she feels that and you have been honest with her who cares.  Life is too short and when you find someone you love-let go of judgement and hold on tight to love.  People that are secure and confident might actually find your past adventure a turn on.
850913
If you're happy. You are old enough to make your own desicion. I know a couple where the woman is 10yrs older and they've been together 15 years.
238958
Wow. Um, depending on where you live, if she's 18, she can do whatever the hell she wants, so if she' snot 18 yet, ride it out, and then run away together. Do what you have to do to be happy with the one you love.
719675
age should never be a problem in a relationship. if you really love the person, then their age shouldnt matter to you or anyone else. my friend's parents have a 20 year age difference and they're perfectly happy. just be happy and dont care about what other people say
147780
about 20-30 years to life nomatter if she says yes or not duh!!!!!!
277128
Give it time, you are still really young and beleive it or not, you could fall in love a few more times before you even hit 20.  Just let her know that you like her a lot and that she is special to you and there's no one else you'd rather be seeing.