i need help and advice my boyfriend...?
479545
I am concerned over the fact that he doesn't want her to say anything to anyone.  To me, that screams out that he has another girlfriend.  Sounds like he is cheating on another girl...there is no other reason to keep their relationship secret.
986512
You're going to need professional counseling. It sounds like he has lost motivation in the relationship and the underlying cause may be hard to find without a counselor's help.
153994
Ask yourself if what you're struggling over is worth it. Is it worth your happiness/relationship?\n\nIf it's not submit to him on that matter, if it doesn't greatly negatively impact your life or morals. If it is talk to him and tell him why this matter is so important to you.\n\nOr talk to him in a calm and rational matter (no screaming) and come upon a decision and understanding that both of you are comfortable with. If no decision or understanding can be reached, seriously consider leaving the relationship.
392888
If he's convinced that you've been cheating on him and can't be persuaded otherwise, then he has trust issues. If he doesn't trust you, how strong is your relationship? \nAnd do you really know what he's thinking? You sound humiliated, and what you really need is a heart-to-heart with your boyfriend. So many problems can be sorted by talking openly and honestly. If you love him, then you have to be able to come to him with your problems. If you're not comfortable and instead would rather ask random people online to help you with relationship issues, then what does this say about the strength of your relationship?
335603
I had the same problem with my present boyfriend.  Instead of trying to constantly get through to him (which can annoy the person after a while), just let him know that you are there for him and that he has no reason to keep his guard up.  This should only be told to him once, and whatever happens after that is up to him.  Though it may take a while for him to accept it and open up, it may work.
758870
We always find something wrong with whatever situation we're in- your boyfriend sounds like he needs some room/latitude to check out things. Don't suffocate him. He probably loves you very much but right now is feeling constrained by the relationship. Best thing you can do is let him know you love him and allow him some opportunity do what he wants. It maybe doesn't seem fair, but it's a chance for you to do some thinking/living for yourself ,too. It is said ,"Set it free and if it's real, it'll return to you sooner or later". That's what good love is- trusting, enduring, and patient as well as self-sacrificing.
1155230
He's the one with the problem not you...rise above it and hopefully your boyfriend will sort it out...if he's the sort worth having!
1052971
My boyfriend's family is full of drug addicts, so I have lots of experience in this.  They are past the point of getting help.  It sounds like your loved-one is not.  I would tell him right now that he needs to go get help.  I would not ignore the problem.  It only gets worse.  You need to stand strong.  Don't feel sorry for him.  But, do not let him just run- you have to let him know that he is cared for.  Most importantly, DO NOT lend him money (he will only use it to buy more crack).  DO NOT let him use your car for any reason.  DO NOT let him live in your house- he'll steal things from you to pawn to buy crack.  This is out of his control- he's an addict now and he needs to go into rehab.
1094995
Hey I just wanted to say thank you for your response to my question, I think it really helped and it wasn't mean. I also think that you are right, he called me this morning and told me that he was knocked out and didnt get up until 12:30 or so. I guess it is still taking me some time to really relax and trust him but I think your response was the best. As far as your situation, my boyfriend is actually 28 and im 18 so yeah, think about that one lol. Thats 10 years older then me, but he loves me and I love him and its been the best relationship I've ever been in. I think true love prevails over age and just as long as you guys can respect each other and love eachother and probably give her some time to also grow, you guys will be just find. Age is really just a number I just feel like sometimes our decisions or the stage that we are at life can sometimes conflict. Just make sure you two continue to communicate and understand eachothers needs and wants to go about things the right way. G-luck.
1044617
Boyfriend, don't do it! \n\nBe blessed and don't jump into that forced mess.
688877
Sounds like your boyfriend is using YOU as his excuse for anything and everything!!\n\nMy opinion and advice?  Get rid of the boyfriend, find someone else who will value you more, and treat you like you're a human being, and not someone to use and abuse as an excuse because they're no good!
491687
He may be going through problems and does not know how to deal with those problems.  He may be trying to work those problems out.\n\nHave you sat down with him to try to find out what is going on in his life?  Maybe he is having problems at home that you are not aware of and it would help him to talk about those problems.\n\nI would suggest that you don't go into a relationship with him again if he is still dealing with the same problems.\nInstead, be there for him, but if he keeps that wall between you, then there is really nothing you can do.  He is going to have to work it out on his own.\n\nGood Luck to you both
242317
This isn't a situation of boyfriend advice. It's full out relationship common sense that's on the table here.\n\nFrom your description, your boyfriend wants your attention exclusively. Which is why you're great when alone together. He's not comfortable sharing you with others for whatever reason. Maybe he feels they'll convince you to leave him, or maybe it's that he doesn't like your friends. I don't know, but there is a reason. Whatever the reason, it needs to be discussed between you two and sorted out.\nIf you don't sort it out and you stay together it means only two choices. Either you're the fighting couple or you'll be your own company and not have other social activities.\n\nWhat this comes down to is what you want for your life. Remember, this is a relationship, a two-way street. If you want to still have your friends and he doesn't that is his choice, just as it was his choice to stop having his friends. Yes, you made the same choices, but you want to turn those around and have your friends as well as have him.\n\nTalk with him. Find out why he's so jealous. If it's something that can be worked out, then great. If it's not, then you have to take a look at the direction the relationship is going and what you want for your life. Decisions will have to be made and they won't be easy ones.\n\nI wish you the best and I hope I helped in some way.\n\nUpdate:\nI just saw your update and wanted to add this.\nYou've had these talks and from your description they're not moving anywhere.\nFrankly, it's time to make a decision for yourself. You can't hold back your life waiting for something to become resolved. Take action and make a decision. I think you should lay it on the line and tell him that either it's got to change or it's over. From all you're saying that seems to be the choices that are out there. Don't be afraid to put it on the line and make the hard decision.\nIt will all work out. I'm sure of that.
658268
i understand you are very frustrated...\n\n... i can see that you want him to make a decision\nbecause you hate being taddled along and dragged about\n....\nand you want a definite 'relationship' or 'not' kind of\n... relationship...\n\n... and i bet you... he understand that as well...\nbut put yourself in his shoes..\n\nif you had a boyfriend and were getting along fine...\nand suddenly, a single guy enters your world...\n\nand completely blows you away...\n.. now what would you do?\nyou might say, 'i'll take him,' but it's not that easy...\n\nhe's struggling...\nand i might take a step further to say...\nmaybe his girlfriend is on him about this...\nmaybe she's getting the hint he's not 100% committed to her\n\nmy best advice to you is... give him time...\n\nif you constantly prod him, he might completely ignore you..\n.. if you give him room for thinking and reconsidering,\nhe will seriously weigh it out...\n\n... moreover, he will see your understanding side\nand your compassionate, openness and he will run to you..\n\n.. meanwhile, you go out and have some fun...\ni don't mean cheat on your soon-to-be-boyfriend\nbut go out and meet your friends... guys and gals...\n\nmeeting other gals will set you back to your\ngiggling-chatty-girly mode, which will ultimately put you\nin a euphoria of confidence..\n\nplus, guys will drool over you, and you can neglect them\nand gain higher self-esteem...\n\ngodspeed
146533
Well, if you don't want to break up the only suggestion I have is talk to him about it. If he is in love or even if he just cares about you he'll understand what your needs are and be more considerate of you.
721065
The best thing to do is ask your boyfriend what he likes and get him to help you out.  Good luck.
791252
um, try to talk to him and ask what his problem is, if he continues to act like this than break up with him, remember, dating at your age dosn't last that long!