Have you heard any jokes on trumpet or tuba players?
475641
Yes and they all BLOW.
1125888
Keep on reading my same old jokes-- I posteed some new ones.\n\nA man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement. \n\n"Listen," says the Doc, "I have migraines too, and the advice I'm going to give you isn't really anything I learned in medical school, but it's advice that I've gotten from my own experience. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. Then I have my wife sponge me off with the hottest water I can stand, especially around the forehead. This helps a little. Then I get out of the tub, take her into the bedroom, and even if my head is killing me, I force myself to have sex with her. Almost always, the headache is immediately gone. Now, give it a try, and come back and see me in six weeks." \n\nSix weeks later, the patient returns with a big grin. \n\n"Doc! I took your advice and it works! It REALLY WORKS! I've had migraines for 17 years and this is the FIRST time anyone has ever helped me!" \n\n"Well," says the physician, "I'm glad I could help." \n\n"By the way, Doc," the patient adds, "you have a REALLY nice house." \n\nWEIRD FACT OF THE DAY: The largest apple pie ever baked was forty by twenty three feet. \n\nON THIS DAY IN HISTORY: In 1919 1st issue of NY Daily News published. \n\nBORN ON THIS DAY: In 1956 - Chris Isaak (actor: Little Buddha, Silence of the Lambs, Married to the Mob, Twin Peaks; singer, songwriter: Wicked Game, Blue Hotel, LP: Silvertone). \n===========================================================================================================================\n\n\n\n So there was an american, a black guy and a mexican that found a genie who granted them each a wish. The black guy asked that he and all of his brothers in America be taken back to their homeland of Africa, so the genie did it. The mexican asked that all of his people in America be brought back to their homes in Mexico, so the genie did that as well. Then the american said: "So you mean to tell me that all of the blacks and mexicans are gone?" and the genie replied "Yeah"; so the american said "Well then i'll have a coke." \n\n ===========================================================================================================================\n\nA young man goes into a pharmacy and says to the\npharmacist, "Hello, could you give me condom.\nI'm going\nto my girlfriend's place for dinner and I think\nI may be in\nwith a chance!"\n\nThe pharmacist gives him the condom and the\nyoung man leaves. He soon returns and says, "Give me\nanother condom because my girlfriend's sister is very\ncute too. She always crosses her legs in a\nprovocative manner when she sees me and I think I might\nstrike it lucky there too."\n\nThe pharmacist gives him a second condom and as\nthe boy is leaving he turns back and says,"Go on,\ngive me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is\nstill pretty cute and when she sees me she always\nmakes eyes, and since she invited me for dinner, think\nshe is expecting me to make a move!\n\nDuring dinner, the young man is sitting with his\ngirlfriend on his left, the sister on his right\nand the mum facing him.\n\nWhen the dad gets there, the boy lowers his head\nand starts praying, "Dear Lord, bless this dinner\nand thank you for all you give us."\n\nA minute later the boy is still praying; "Thank\nyou Lord for your kindness."\n\nTen minutes go by and the boy is still praying,\nkeeping his head down.\n\nThe others look at each other surprised and his\ngirlfriend is even more surprised than the\nothers.\nShe gets close to the boy and says in his ear,\n"I didn't know you were so reli
1025064
I've played trumpet for 30 years and never heard of this one.  I have heard of mouthpieces that weren't round, though, like oval or elliptical or different shapes.\n     Given my own experiences in bands I will tell you that everyone is completely original in their sound and the way they play trumpet, I doubt one rule will work for everyone.  Everyone's lips, teeth, embouchure, etc. is completely unique.  My suggestion would be to try out different things with the mouthpiece and see what's working for you.
291898
Check this site out .. it's fun! http://www.amiright.com/misheard/
107870
Yes, someone knows one or more funny jokes.  http://answers.yahoo.com/dir/;_ylt=ArnzjuRlqSbxSa5yiGyF8SL4y6IX?link=list&sid=396546041
972919
No, but why would you want to play the trumpet?
1086849
I havent but thanks for the laugh :)
945713
Alot of name sound funny.
182043
I've heard pleanty of Holocaust jokes, and they're dam funny!!!!
705037
I started playing tuba when I was in the 5th grade and let's just say I didn't start growing until later in life... and I'm still not that tall.  My mom thought I was crazy for playing an instrument that was larger tha I was, but it was something I really wanted... It turned not to be a problem at all and I did fine playing and marching with it.  Have fun and enjoy.  It's a wonderful instrument and a great experience.  Take care!
182464
mildly amusing. \nNow I have some humorous audio for you (below)
1054403
One of the best things I ever saw was when that twisted moron showed up to spew his poison at a Gay Pride parade in San Francisco... The was a marching band comprised entirely of fellows in "Dorothy Drag"... I literally fell to the pavement laughing when a 6'4", 220lb, very muscular Dorothy jumped the parade line, punched Phelps square in the mouth, and got right back in formation without missing a beat.\n\n(somehow the 4 officers from the SFPD must have all been looking the other way at that exact moment because not a one of them saw a thing.... but all were laughing as hard as I was.)
1023389
just when i think you've told them all....you seem to find a new joke even more funny then the ones before. keep them jokes comming sweetheart!
969181
Yeah, I laughed at that one too.  But I laughed better at your answer to the Jingle Bells question. lol\nI love your jokes and stories.  Keep up the good work.
291956
Well, to say the least a few of them did even though it was dry humor....\nNow our President G. W. Bush has a sense of humor and he also says things that make one laugh if you listen to him.\n\nGo to the Sites I have listed here and see just how funny our president is.
977574
LOVED the joke.  Haven't heard (or read) such a funny joke is ages!!!
912403
pretty funny.. i've heard some of them before