Please translate these for me my friends?
488345
Kay! How dare you tell people your name is Tanya!!??! I'm telling mom, and you is gonna be grounded cuz I saw sum the questions you had asked, ooo you is gon be in BIG trouble, ya hear? I am very disapointed in you big sister, and ya know what, you asked the questions on my Mad Kids Magazine. Learn Chinese fortune cookie slips!! The proper answers for them are...\n\nThe Real Answers:\n1. My hat is on fire.\n2. Why do the dumplings roll?\n3. Love is contagious, just like the bacteria in your tea!\n4. I have been stabbed by my chopsticks.\n5. You are so ugly, you look like you fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch!!\n\nSee? Babel Fish Translator is full of crap, people. Look at the big difference!!\n\nBabel Fish Translator\n1. My hat fire.\n2. Why does the stuffed dumpling roll>\n3. The love is infectious, look slike the bacterium in yours tea!\n4. My chopsticks split me.\n5. You are very ugly, you looked like you tumbled the ugly tree and have hit each branch!!\n\nStupid
1013859
I´m from Czech republic. I can help you translate something, but I´m not sure, if I´m a good teacher. U can write on : katka_rudecka@yahoo.com
927115
ok, I will. I am Dutch, and my english is good. You can send me the message and I will translate it in english. icqanne@yahoo.com.
962686
Very formal :\n\n\nSehr geehrte Frau Schmidt,\n\nwir moechten uns recht herzlich fuer Ihre Einladung bedanken. Wir haben das Zusammensein mit Ihnen und Ihrem Gatten ehrlich genossen. Besonders moechten wir uns fuer die von Ihnen gemachten Maultaschen bedanken, sie waren hervorragend und haben uns sehr gut geschmeckt.\n\nWir wuenschen Ihnen und Ihrer Familie froehliche Weihnachten und ein Gutes Neues Jahr 2007.\n\nMit freundlichen Gruessen\n\nCarla\n\n(That is very formal: pay attention with the capital letters ! The others have been created with a translation program and are horrible  !!!! I love Maultaschen.)
1035510
what??? english please!
975550
Sweetheart, different sources use different abreviations. Can you type out specifically what they are? Then I might be able to help you.
497878
did you try the google translator?\n\nIts really good, one of the best out there.
118643
???? English please!!
489983
I do...what do u wanna translate though?
558277
www.freetranslation.com\njust use the free part.\nits not a human translation but its better than nothing.
276538
what? english please..
1089903
if they are not big you can send them to me and i can translate the fast losojosmasazules@yahoo.es
78667
can u translate that in english?
241565
Google.translator.It will help you on this
1153639
yes\nno, but i can translate them!\nryan singh, dr.zeus, manak e, sukhshinder shinda, jazzy b just ask me !
107683
Can u write in english please so we can understand wat u are asking us.
248771
google it ;) or if you wanted it translated...put it into the google translator but sometimes it messes it up.