What should I do about my future mother-in-law?
489317
Honey she wanted this fight with you and the bf. She finally found that right nerve to hit with you. Now it is up to you just how much you love him and figure if this is the way you want the right of your life. She is never going to change if anything she will only get worse...C
853110
"Various Reasons"  I will trust you when you say none of them are serious.  If I were you, I would put my foot down once and for all.  Tell your Mom and your sister, be nice about it but firm,  that you do not appreciate their back stabbing regarding your wife-to-be.  Tell them you love them all, but you are not going to put up with any more of it.  And if they love you, they will have to make the effort to accept her as well, because YOU love her and that should be reason enough.  Tell them that disrespecting HER is like disrespecting YOU.  And you do not want them to do it anymore.  If they are reasonable people, they will listen and abide.  If they are not, I would simply make myself scarce when it comes to visiting your mother and sister.  Harsh as it may sound, they will get the message and eventually lighten up on your beloved.  CONGRATS on your upcoming wedding and GOOD LUCK!!
865717
Remember that mother in laws had mother in laws too.  If you get along with your mother in law, then just act normal, have fun and allow her to make the main decisions; it is of course her kitchen.  Accept her suggestions with grace and all should be fine.  If she loves to cook, she already knows what has to be done, so ask her when you get there, what she would like you to cook - whether its the potatoes, cranberries, etc.  And if you are not sure how to cook them, ask her, make her the center of the cooking and don't try to make it a competition.  Good luck
131010
girl, i feel your pain. i have the mother-in-law blues as well.  she shouldnt be so intrusive and pushy. my fiance and i just had a falling out with his mother. our lives are so peaceful when they dont talk. i dont know how close your husband is with his mother, but there are lines you just dont cross and shes just testing you out. i dont know if your a blunt person or not like me, but you and your husband can both say it her so that she understands its the two of you who feel this way. not just you. you have every right to feel uncomfortable about someone knowing your finances and business period. but first talk to your husband before you talk to her. good luck.
457966
If you really need to be together get the hotel room. But, I think it would be a GREAT gesture on your part to stay with your future mom in-law and abide by her rules. It would show her that you respect her and her rules. Plus it would only be for a few days. You can do it =)
303169
This is one of the hardest things to resolve in relationships, unfortunately. Keep in mind that your mother-in-law is also your wife's mother. I'm sure you already know that most people try to please, or at least placate, their mother. You're in a difficult position, but there are some things you can do:\n\n1. Communicate with your wife ... constantly. The two of you must not allow this to interfere with your relationship.\n\n2. Communicate with your mother-in-law. Do NOT retaliate in kind ... EVER! Do NOT lose your temper! She obviously angers you, but you have to be bigger than that. Ask her what it is that bothers her about you and offer to try and change at least some of those things ( IF you can and IF they are not part and parcel of who you are ).\n\n3. If you can afford to, you and your wife should find a competent marriage counselor to help you cope with this problem ... soon!\n\n4. When the baby arrives, I suspect your mother-in-law will want very much to see him/her as often as possible, particularly if this is her first grandchild. This gives you an excellent lever. Stress to your mother-in-law that this is both YOUR child and HER grandchild, and that both of you should want to do what is best for the child; and that her berating you will definitely NOT be good for the child. As an ABSOLUTE LAST RESORT, if you and your wife AGREE on this, BOTH of you have a talk with her mother and tell her, as gently as possible, that the TWO of you have decided to not expose your child to your mother-in-law's berating of you. Stress that, if she is willing to stop it, she can visit anytime the three of you agree. Let me stress again that this is a LAST RESORT, and should only be used if BOTH you and your wife truly AGREE!\n\nGood luck with this, and don't foget to seek that which is best for ALL parties involved.
922637
My suggestion is like many others, THANK HER every chance you get as this could make or break your relationship with her. If your weight doesn't change often I'd say start the dress at the beginning of the year. Of course small alterations can be made later, but then you can get the jist of things and make sure you both are on the right track and still have time for changes if need be.\nI really think you should get as many pictures as possible of what you want. I might even go to the extent of taking her dress shopping with you, trying on dresses, taking pictures in them and showing her what you like about each dress and why you think that type of dress would work best for you. Engrave in her head what you see in yours and hopefully that will keep her straying on the dress to a minimum. During the process of making it try it on often and correct anything you want before it can't be fixed. \n\nI'd say start it early in case you end up completely disliking it, then you'll have time to find something new. Though that my cause rifts between you and the mother-in-law.\n\nI totally know how you feel, my soon to be mother-in-law is trying to convince me their 45' x 30' back yard which is taking up mostly by a vegetable garden is the perfect location for our reception.
525867
Hey there, just to let you know, all the mother-in-laws in the world are jealous of their daughter-in-laws. The least they'd think is that some little bit*ch has come along to steal the little boy she's loved for years that she's raised into her little man. That's the rule of the nature. Heard of Odipeous? I don't want to get too Freudian about this. But I hope you get it. I wouldn't be surprised that you mother-in-law has lust for her own son; in that case, she's a sick piece.\n  You should let you fiancé know that you're the one he's marrying and having children with, not that bit*ch of a so called mother of his. If he ever gives you any bull about not being nice to his mom, you need to let him know that if he won't put you first, plenty of men out there would. In that case, you don’t need some mama’s boy anyway; he can just live with his mommy for ever if that’s the case.\n  On the other hand, maybe that mother-in-law to be of yours is just getting used to the idea that she's losing and that you're winning.\n  I wouldn't be surprised if that mother of his, if she's white that is, is a racist; in that case, as long as your fiancé loves you and respect you, just cut her out of the picture. If she's the same race as you, she's just being old fashioned and nevertheless, a stupid bit*ch for you to disregard.\n  So, don't even think about sucking up to her. It's that unpleasant bit*ch that's suppose to show you some respect. Remember, respect is earned, not given. Just because she's the mom of you future husband doesn't mean you're to give in to her stupid game. As long as your man knows better, which I presume that he does, he'd know that he's going to come home to you for years and withdraw further and further away from his "mother" to the point that miserable old witch would regret being a bit*ch to you.\n  So, as long as your fiancé puts you first, you should disregard that miserable old woman and realize that you're winning and she's losing. \n  You have my sympathy. Keep your chin up. That miserable old thing isn't worth your time or emotions. You’re here to make yourself happy, not to make that miserable old fool happy. She doesn’t matter at all. Marry this guy, cut her out of the picture, and be happy!
1113427
I'd tell off my mother-in-law! \n\nI'd tell her it is NOT okay to hit me, it is not okay to put me down in front of my children, her son CHOSE me so she needs to forget aout his ex, she needs to stop saying she wants to fins him a new wife, she needs to stop lying, she needs to stop steeling my things, especially my underwear, and she needs to keep her nose in her own business. I know hoe to keep my man happy, while hers is walking out the door every month becuase he's fed up of her. If she's not careful, one of these time's he's not going to come back.
877543
Relationships with in-laws can be so difficult.  I know it is none of my business, but why in the world are you living with them?!!!  It would be really nice if you and your husband could have a place of your own to live.  It would not fix all the problems, but it would certainly help out a lot.  You and your husband need to stand together whenever you confront your in-laws.  Maybe your husband needs to do the talking for both of you so they will know that you both agree with what you are confronting them about.  It will be difficult for your in-laws to accept that you and your husband are one now and that they should not interfere in your marriage.  And what is the deal with them not letting you two open your own bank account?  Aren't you adults?  Don't you have your own money?  Why is it any of their business?  Why is your husband letting them control the 2 of you?  Is he having issues "letting go of mommy's apron strings" or something?  \n\nI would suggest that you both see a family/marriage counselor and ask him to help you find a way to deal with your in-laws.  I have a similar problem with my in-laws which almost broke up our marriage, and our couselor suggested that my husband and I confront them together in a loving manner.  He said that if they still refuse to respect me and refuse to change the way they treat us, we need to stop being around them.  In my opinion, you and your husband need to make a decision to put your marriage first if you want it to survive, and do not let anything or anyone come between you.  Find a way to move out.  I'm assuming it is their house since your mother-in-law has removed your belongings from the rest of the house.  You and your husband need to put some distance between yourselves and his parents.  He needs to let them know that he has a family and responsibility of his own now that they cannot interfere with.\n\nAs for how to deal...  That is so difficult.  Continually forgive them for the things they do.  Don't hold on to grudges.  Don't let anger eat away at you or turn into hatred.  It will ruin your health, your marriage, and your whole life.  Continue to stand up for yourself and for your marriage.  And also remember that when you have a child, things are most likely going to get worse with your in-laws, so be prepared.  I wish you the best and hope that you can find your own place to live and maybe a family counselor as well.
28312
Relegion is a big part of your life aparently, and you should communicate with her and get her thoughts and feelings about the subject.\n\nI do wish to congradulate you on exploring ccompatability and your future with her BEFORE you are married with children.\n\nTake care and good luck
149996
Move out. Tell your hubby it is me or mommie. no one needs to exist where they are slaves to thier inlaws. I cook I clean I work my butt off sounds a lot like cinderella except there will be no prince charming to help you out.
873141
i am very sorry to hear that.  But you have to be patient.  Keep your baby, and try to keep your marriage.  He needs to stand up to his mother but it may not happen because she is ill, sit tight and be patient.  Give him time to think
1073984
hard to say. do it unless your mother in law is a real woman hitler as you call her. \nbut if you've already had disputes before, i'd say you don't. cuz what is a life of hell with more money in your pocket? just a life of hell.\ni've been living with my mother in law for a year and she was always interfering in our lives. it determined us to move into a new apartment, smaller but ours only.
904774
Believe it or not YOU ARE NOT your mothers keeper.  My mother went through alot of bad relationships.  It took a long time to understand IT WAS NOT MY PROBLEM.  You are old enough to be married so BE MARRIED.  You will grow old with your wife (hopefully, not all of life is guaranteed) Your mother will grow old with her choices.  You cannot change your mom or her choices
239017
If you don't feel you are ready then don't. Becuase if you aren't happy about the situation now, you won't be happy in the marriage. Do what you think is best--don't let anyone tell you that you have to marry someone just because they want you to.\n\nI am having this problem with my future mother in law about children. She thinks I should have kids becuase she did, my parents did etc. She also wants grandchildren. If she wants them so badly, then she can go and adopt them. It's my body, my decision, and if I want kids, then I will have them. Not because someone else said so, or because that is what they want.\n\nYou are in control of yourself--just because they are pressuring you, don't cave. Be strong and listen to your heart! People got on my back about getting married several years ago, and I finally yelled at them and told them to quit asking--it will happen when it does. A couple years later, we were engaged, but not because they said so. We did it when we were ready. That is what you should do too.\n\nDo it when you are ready.
1139939
Well since my home is my castle.....\nShe needs to be put in her place immediately.  Thats YOUR home, and you have every right to set her straight.  Doesnt matter how long they've been together.  One does NOT enter anyone's home without knocking.  That's simply rude and disrespectful.\nAs for calling her Aunt, I'd suggest (to her) they may do so when she becomes their aunt (via marriage)\nAs for moving in with mom....That's a matter for mom and her son!  Now if you feel that's all too harsh.  Then I'd have a family confab, and bring it all out, with all present.  That way e/one gets to speak their peace openly, and it does not become a 'he said, she said' kinda thing.\nTake charge of your home, and I wish you the very best!