How to stop giving a parent money?
477041
Part of living at home is dealing with things like this. Depending on how much money you are giving to your mother, think of it as more of a cost of living there. If you are able to live elsewhere, for less - you MAY consider that - but don't forget - there is a whole lot more - utilities, insurance, you'll be alone or with someone that is not your mother - which means (if you are sharing) they can disappear at any time and leave you stuck with rent/bills etc.\n\nKeep track of the money, via an excel spreadsheet or even simple pen and paper. If your mother pays you back one day, great! - if not - then it was just the cost of your being safe in a place that you know - which is usually better than being in a place you don't know, with people you think you know.\n\nI Hope this helps.\n\nGood luck!
365693
The way to avoid this is to set the rules first. Tell the person that you are willing to pay for gas, food, etc. and you only have enough money  to buy your clothes and the rest is for bills. Also, I would take out the money before hand for my clothes and for the favor and put it in separate wallets to appear like I don't have that much money.
499115
Well, sounds to me like you may never get your money here. I would just be upfront...tell her that your parents have decided they would like to buy it and since she has been unable to pay you the agreed upon amount you are going to sell it to them. She has renigged on her agreement and that gives you the right to sell it to someone else. If her and her uncle are upset...they will get over it.
527066
Tell her to get a grant..\n\nLots of paper work but it there for the taking if people pursue it and what it bad enough.\n\nPLUS : Its time for her to learn responsibility's of being on her on. Part-time job will do.\n\nKids get bad but as they mature they forgive because they realize that Parents do know best.\n\nI had a girl friend her son was 27 never worked and ever time you said work it was back to college life time student. Well that didnot work out but you our married so its different try to find away to hold on. ( Great woman to and she even worked for State Farm Insurance but between us both his bills where to much. )\n\nI hope for you all to have the best in life it can give for you to work through this.
763394
Tell your Dad he had better cease and desist, you are 50% owner of the home and ALL decisions concerning the property need to be jointly made. Any money that is generated by the property you are entitled to 50% of, unless there are other stipulations. If he does not comply, you might need to get a lawyer, it sucks, but that might be your only recourse.
667083
At a certain point in everyone's life they must choose to do what is best for them which may not be what their parents wish. If your father is unwilling to pay college expenses explore other available financing offers. Going against parental wishes is difficult. You must decide which is more important - your desire for higher education or maintaining family harmony!
1057870
Tell your new "Mother" to shove it and shut the h*ll up.  Tell her off.  Tell her what ever you need to to make her stop talking like that.  If you are unable to or unwilling to.  Then looks like you got to tell your dad what's up or continue to bite your tounge.
519815
If it were me, she'd be giving me the money back one way or another.  I would let her know exactly how disappointed I was in her, & she would have to EARN my trust back.  If you & her father are still on the same page where parenting is concerned, I wouldn't hesitate to get him involved, either.  At the very least, he should know about this behavior, because who is to say she didn't pull the same stunt on him, & possibly got $3,000 out of the deal?\nI don't believe the statements made that you shouldn't scold her.  She's still your child, & should be held accountable for her actions.  You are still her parent, no matter how old she is, & in a situation like this, she should be disciplined.  If she doesn't want to give you back the money, get the police involved.  Don't let her think she can run over you with threats of leaving & never talking to you again.  Your job is to make her respect you & to be a better person, not to have her like you.  Don't be her friend, be her parent.  If she needs the money for something she isn't comfortable discussing with you, most likely she's doing something she knows is wrong, & of which you'd disapprove.
560576
You cant handle this unless you are the mom. If she doesn't want this happening she has to set her foot down and tell her child she still their parent and is capable of making her own decisions. Although she appreciates their concern she will ask for their advice when she needs it. Until then she will live her life the way she wants.                                              I have a twenty-six year old and a twenty-seven year old so I know where your coming from. As a mother we never stop wanting to make everything ok and easy for our kids, no matter their age. But you have to ask yourself if something (god forbid) happen to you tomorrow and you weren't around to hand out money or whatever could your child survive. Did you give them the proper tools to make it. Its ok to help but I draw the line when it comes to taking all the responsibility of life over. I don't feel I,m helping them if I haven't taught them how to be adults and be able to survive without me when the time comes. They know I love them and I,m here no matter what but they also know I,m mom not the bank. Its hard to say no to our kids but your not helping them grow if you don't let them take on responsibility of an adult. She will kick and scream at first because its easier for her to let you do everything but in the long run its the best thing for her.Good luck be firm but loving.
746872
Check with an attorney to see if you can get her declared incompetent and you should seek power of attorney to make financial decisions on her behalf.  It sounds like your brother has started this process already.  So discuss with attorney the possibility of courts deciding which of you have her best interests at heart.  \n\nI'm really sorry about what you are going through, when money gets in the middle of family affairs sometimes it gets complicated.  \n\nBest of luck to you and your mother!
681132
keep taking care of your mom in the loving way you are and to heck with the siblings.\n\nAs far as the land is concerned if you don't buy it there will be a big mess when she passes. \n\nMy ex got really pissy when his grandmother gave everything to her nephew...........but I thought it was the right thing to do because her nephew took care of her every day of her life after her only child passed.
559761
One year not so long ago...I found myself in a similar situation.  Money wasn't really the problem, it's just that I was so tired of the "traditional" gifts. Mom once told me that the most valuable thing you can give a person is your time....so that year I got some real pretty stationary and wrote her a long letter.  I thanked her for all the things that she taught me and how that I wouldn't be the person I am today without her as my mother.  I was real specific, even using particular examples both from childhood and adulthood.  Just to give you an example:  From you, mom, I learned honesty.  Remember when I was 5 and we were playing checkers and the phone rang?  You got up to answer the phone and because I was losing I decided to move some of the pieces.  When you came back you noticed and punished me by not playing any games with me for a week because you didn't play with "cheaters". From you, mom, I learned how to get the most for my money.  We were in a grocery store one time and I noticed that you were counting the slices in a loaf of bread.  I asked what you were doing and you told me that you were trying to get the most slices for the money.  I was a teen-ager then and rolled my eyes. Now that I understand the true value of money, I understand.\n\nI'm sure that you get the idea.  Mom cried when she read my letter, it was probably about five or six pages long.  What it did, was point out to her what she accomplished.  It honored, acknowledged, & respected her.  She said that that was the BEST mother's day gift I could have given her.  It took some time and thought but it was worth it...for many reasons.....mom passed away in October of last year.  I am so thankful that I was able to let her know how much I learned from her.  This Mother's Day will be my first without her, and I'm trying hard not to think about it too much.  \n\nOn another note, your mother and mother-in-law probably know your financial situation.  They won't (and shouldn't) be expecting a lot.  Acknowledging their special day with the meals you have planned is more than enough.  Maybe you could combine both meals into one????  This would be less expensive.\n\nAs far as the baby shower...concentrate on the mom. Buy her some pamper stuff...bath stuff, candles, chocolate, hair ties, etc.  She'll be getting plenty of stuff for the new arrival...she'll appreciate it and won't feel so unimportant.  Hope some of this helps.
66787
their your parents they are supposed to be in your business, they do it because they care nothing else. but if your really want them to stop make everything that you have accessable, they will eventually trust if they find nothing bad.
621544
DON'T do a paper round!! it nearly killed me when i did that....i quit after 6 months!!!yeah try babysitting but i bet thats hard work too, and you need to be very responsible and trustworthy to have parents allow your to care for their baby. Stick to pocket money is my advice...sowwi.
568803
Tell yur mom that it is between her and your father, and you are not interested in getting involved.  If she gives you heck, tell her that you are just a kid, and this is an adult situation.  If she gives you even more heck, get on the phone and tell your dad that he is a wimp for not talking to your mom.  Let them know you don't want to get involved, and they won't involve you.
193622
You dont.... You should stop and take a look at what they offer you.\nYou wouldn't be here if it weren't for them.\nThey feed you and put a roof over your head. SO, whatever little petty reason you want to "get rid of them" you'd better rethink it. \n\nI can tell you from experience that times can be tough. And I am sure that everyone can tell you that when they were younger they at least once hated their parents. However, now that we're older and can look back at that... We realize why things happened the way they  did. As a child we like to think that we know what's best for us. Feel as if your partents are holding you back, when in fact, they are saving you from the worlds nasty people and truth... It's not easy in the real world. Enjoy your parents for as long as you can. They wont be here forever and then you will have no one to turn to. Charish every day that your parents are still with us on earth. Dont let a day end without telling them how much you love 'em. If you do... Someday, you'll be sorry...
276617
I think she is having the independant woman syndrome. Have her realize that you are are not giving her money for you own expenses, but assist in the raising of your kids. Maybe if she feels less like you are helping her directly and more like it is for the kids she will take money from you.