what if youre being abused by your husband and u fall in love with some one else?
479641
bein abused by ur husband is...i think the most demeanin, and the lowest thing a man could possibly do. Physical abuse equals mental abuse, and its a situation where the women feels helpless...her spirits are low...her confidence is diminished. SO, im pretty sure ur going thru this with ur husband. And i would totally understand why u would fall in love with another man, especially if that man gives u the respect, the affection, the love that you deserve and that ur husband, for some reason, is not providing. You needed some one to vent to and remember\n\nIf ur husband wasn't treatin u like $#!T u wouldn't need that other man to vent and talk to...so basically ur husband was askin for it
953176
I know it's very hard, but you have to distance yourself from him. He's married, you're with someone...just picture his wife and how she would feel, and how you would feel if someone did that to you.
180483
falling in love with someone that doesnt love me
1131650
falling for someone who was out to hurt me
554338
if 2 people fall in love it just makes the world a better place\n\nother people's relationships are none of your business (unless somebody is being abused and then the police should be contacted to intervene)
935248
when love becomes obsession then there is a problem
1186250
i could not imagine what you are going through. i personally have never experience or been in that situation.i think you do not love yourself or feel worthy for someone to love you.that is very important no matter what family drama or life changes you have to go through you must always remember to love yourself.
937593
i would talk to him and explain your feelings. My husband and I used to play fight and when things gor out of hand I think he thought I was able to handle the come back, because I was willing to play. Men often forget how strong they are. Once I explained to my husband he was hurting me everything changed.
906524
Acutally you hit upon the problem you said he manipulates you, that's NOT love.  That is seeking control and that IS a type of abuse, that usually turns into physical abuse later on.  What you should do is to decide if you want to be with someone who would stoop to manipulate and control you and possibly get physically violent with you later on in the relationship or if you want to be with someone who loves you for who you are and appreciates and respects you.  It's your call.
1109525
First of all unless anyone has walked in your shoes they should not be judging you.  I am going through the same thing right now.  It has not been easy for me.  This person is a friend of mine and my husbands, he is also married.  We were chatting then one thing lead to another, the chat turned sexual and from there I formed an emotional bond with this man. Nothing has happend physically but  it has totally messed up my emotions, I feel like I am a mess since this has happend.  I have a great husband, and I am no longer communicating with our friend, but honestly I always think about him and miss him, why I don't know but it has been real hard.  This is one door I wish I never would have opened.  I don't know your details but the one thing I can tell you is to ask yourself what led you to do this, I had to do the same and I am in counseling right now.  Believe me I did not expect this hardship when I first started dabbling in this, it seemed harmless and kind of fun, but like they say when you play with fire, you will get burned and that I did.
1088474
I have decided after two marriages that there are different kinds of love, you do what makes YOU feel the best.  You won't be able to change your husband, and I know from experience, they may try to change, but it rarely works out, and if so only temporarily.\nIt ends up not being fair to either one of you.  Don't take a chance on losing your new love...........
1048708
Your situation sounds very similar to my life story.  My wife and I got married very young, and I was not always very nice to her.  I drank a lot, and though I never physically abused her, I did emotionally.\n   She ended up becoming distant and looking for emotional relief in other men.  Never physical, but emotional hurts just as much.  I ended up meeting a woman, straying, and falling for her and it almost destroyed my life.\n   My wife and I go to counseling, which I suggest for you, and are working extremely hard to repair our marriage.  We are doing a good job, and things in many ways are better than ever, but there is still work for both of us to do.  In the end, ideally, we will have both grown stronger and love each other all the more because of all we have been though with each other.\n   This man is probably more of an infatuation than love because you are feeling things that you have missed.  Devote yourself to your husband, and him to you and remake better than before the love you had.\n   Get counseling, work it out.  Find you flame again.  If this does not work, than the only option left is to divorce, but this should be your last option, not your only option.\n\nGood luck.
500399
I am so sorry to hear so. No one deserves to be abused no matter what. That is totally unacceptable!!! \nIt depends alot on the mans upbringing, they were raised to see their mothers abused and he was taught it was OK. And there are other types of men who think if a women is being loyal and submissive to their husbands that they are weak and have no self-worth. Let me tell you this, if you let a man abuse you once, he will keep doing it again and again, it's human nature.\nYou deserve to be with someone who will appreciate what and who you are. Someone to give you the respect you deserve and the love you dream of. Don't you EVER let anyone abuse you in anyway. You need to take are of yourself and love yourself.\nI wish you the best and I really do wish you find someone who deserves you and take care....
401031
You know, I'm really proud of you because you know what true love is, eventhough you were hurt, you still love the person and want to be with him. The first you should do is to know what the root of the problem is, try to find out what caused your husband to find someone else and cheat on you. When this things happen, we should not always think that your partner is the problem eventhough it is their fault most of the time, let's try not to be bias, let us look at orselves, ask yourself "Is there a problem with me?", or "Am I giving enough time and attention to him?" These questions will really help you examine your own self and discover some of your negative sides. But don't compare yourself to the woman he's seeing right now because all of us are different and its not a good attitude to compare yourself with others because it develops insecurities. After that, try to talk to him and prove him how you love him so much, be honest and make sure will be able to tell him all that you feel. Let him realize that it will be better that your children will grow-up seeing you together because their primary need is not money, food, good house, but a whole and happy FAMILY... Goodluck to you...
364878
sorry to hear that. but i really think you need to see someone professional to get over this. if you are getting back together you have to consider whether he will be able to understand you and forgive you. a professional will help you forgive yourself, however i think that there is nothing wrong with being with someone else when youre separated. feeling "dirty" - come on, the guy made you do things you didnt want to do, hes the dirty one!! make sure youre not getting together with your husband because youre feeling bad after the abusive relationship, you have to make sure that the true reason is your love for him and not pity for yourself. a professional will help yu figure things out! :)
40333
you should get a divorce.then again does that other person feel the same way about you .you need to be true to yourself and your husband.it is not eair to him
308964
Bless your heart. It will take time after going through verbal abuse. Words hurt deeper than any slap, and the pain lasts far longer. Please seek marriage counselling.