if my wife goes to a strip club with frends is it ok for her to be turned on by the guys or should i be upset?
481580
I wouldn't like it to be honest. I'm not against porn, but I would be very upset if my husband was turned on by other chicks, especially if he went to a strip joint. I only agree to porn and stuff if they just look, but don't get turned on by that person. I am happy to look at porn together. Your wife needs to show you some respect! I would never do that to my husband. I wouldn't even get the urge to do something like that. Not if I'm in love.
408648
Probably not. First of all, you'd have to deal with hundreds of other guys seeing YOUR girl without her clothes on. Also, you'll constantly be worrying that she's sneaking around behind your back with one or more of those guys. Not to mention the fact that most strippers are into the whole party scene, which will not only get old soon but will also make it hard to take her seriously.
1023478
I used to be a stripper and bar manager, so I understand where your feelings are coming from, I had to deal with a lot of insecure wives and gf's in that place. But if it is a clean and decent club. Then I assure you, you have nothing to worry about. Strippers are just working people too, some people do it with their clothes on others with no clothes. Most adult entertainers are there to work to raise kids, go to college or just to pay bills. I agree there are some out there who do other things to make money and that's what give's strippers a bad name in general. I used to host couples nights on Saturday nights just so the wives and gf's could come in and see what goes on there. So what if a man get's a lap dance. It's just a dance and most laws state that dancers have to have a certain amount of space between them and the customer. It's all in fun that's why it is called Adult Entertainment. If you want to message me and ask me more about it I will do my best to answer all of your questions about it. But I am sure that you have nothing to worry about by your man going to the strip club. Hope this answer helps from someone in the profession.
52592
Yes, I would.\n\nIf he was serious about it, it's not my job as his partner to rule his life. It wouldn't make me notably uncomfortable. The only thing that would make me hesitate is if he didn't ever want me to come see him perform. I think it would be fun to watch him now and then and, as long as this new activity isn't shutting me out entirely, I'd be happy to let him take his gear off and get down.\n\nI'd want to know all the details, of course. A club for men? Women? Couples? Bachelorette parties?\n\nHe would also be expected to take me out to dinner once in a while, but that would be true even if he wasn't stripping.
763522
Yep. \n\nYou're lusting over other women. If she did this to you with men, how would you feel? You would probably be a little jealous, a little angry, and being a guy you may want to retaliate by showing her you could "hook-up" with women online. And she doesn't know if the only thing you're doing is a "sex-chat". If she was alone in her room with the computer... on a webcam... in some lingerie or WHATEVER... you would want to know if she's doing something else besides talking dirty. You would probably wanna stay and make sure that's ALL she was doing. \n\nAnd she may feel the same way right now. She already knows you're a pervert. Do you want her to think you're a sex-addict too?! \n\nBut that might not be a bad idea... She might try to help you "work through your situation" and let you "chat" a little bit at a time until you're "cured". ?\n\nI think it would be best for your relationship if you just quit and tried to work things out with your wife. Who knows? You might find something else more "fun" to do together. Seriously. Just ask her.\n\nOh...\n\nYeah, you can be termed as deceitful and unfaithful.\n\nBrother DzL (AsP)\n"The Player's Lifestyle"
566664
Yes, no, and maybe.  Sounds confusing.\nThe Yes part is I love my wife's body and I do adore it even though she is overweight.  When she dresses sexy or moves a certain way it sometimes gives me a immediate hard on (probably too much information) or it is a real turn on.\nHowever, there are times when she isn't as appealing.  That is the no answer.  This is usually when she isn't happy with herself and her body.  She is afraid to show it off and I think its part that but it is also part of her personality.  She doesn't seam as happy and as talkative and seams to get upset easily.  So even though her outsides are the same her insides are making herself totally unappealing.\nThe maybe part is when she gets like above.  I start to think about her in really sexy cloths and lingerie (stuff she doesn't even own but wich she would go and buy) and it really turns me on.
240426
The first and most important thing to consider is your own motivations. Are you concerned for her pleasure? or just for your own? (and you better be completely honest with yourself about this). Are you open to the probability that she will end up having more erotic fun than you do? This often happens in swinging, because women are pure gold in the swinging world, whereas males are a dime a dozen. Is you wife open to bisexual play? If so, your chances for fun are dramatically increased.\n\nAlso of great importance are some tips for what NOT to do when you approach this topic with your wife. Here are some basics Dos and Don'ts:\n\nDo NOT let her get the sense that you want to try swinging just because you are bored with your sex life. Instead, approach the topic in terms of increasing her pleasure (and please don't just do this just to play her emotions - if you can't do this honestly from your heart, don't do it at all!) Tell her that you value her happiness, and let her know that if she has any fantasies about other men or women, you would be supportive in helping her fulfill them. Of course you should be honest and admit that you enjoy similar fantasies, but the proof of your commitment to HER pleasure is your willingness to let her explore even if it doesn't lead immediately to sex for you. Once she is secure in your love and support, she will be more open to seeing you pursue your fantasies.\n\nRemember that in swinging, women rule. Her attractions and comfort levels are what matter most. She must be the leader in setting the pace and defining the limits. You can lobby for your wishes, but ultimately she must have the final word. If she is not happy and comfortable, nothing much can happen. If YOU are not ok with this fact of life, then you and your wife are flirting with disaster if you try swinging.\n\nBe sure to let her know you love her, and reassure her that you are NOT considering cheating if she resists the idea of swinging. You are making a suggestion for the benefit of both, not demanding, pleading, or laying down an ultimatum. If she is resistant to swinging, some compromises might include exploring erotic adventures together as a couple in ways that preserve monogamy. Examples: “same-room-sex” at an orgy. Watching porn together. Role-playing. Attending jack&jill parties (basically a mixed-sex "circle jerk" party). And so on.\n\nThese are just some general ideas. Obviously everything depends on your wife’s personality and the particular nature of your relationship with her. If you want more specific ideas based on your particular circumstances, I will be happy to respond to email. If you happen to live in Ohio, I can suggest events, groups, etc., you might want to consider for either monogamous or non-monogamous erotic adventure-seeking.
570506
Before examining your wife, lets take a look at this dude.  If he was a friend of hers, he wouldnt be making underhanded comments about you, doing things behind your back, etc.  If he was a friend of hers, he would want to be friends with you as well.  I mean, he is a dude.  He knows it is shady to do things behind your back.  Plus, he is putting your wife, his supposed friend, in a compromising position.\n\nNext issue, it is 100% your wife's responsibility to do the right thing.  You probably have a hot wife so you cant blame dudes for wanting her, but you can hold her accountable for doing the right or wrong thing.  She is the one that is married.\n\nSomeone else said this and it is absolutely correct, approach your wife with your feelings in a nonthreatening or emotional manner.  You gotta tell her how you feel and let her know that dismissing your feelings as jelous or irrational is not acceptable.  If this guy is truely a friend, he would hang out with both of you.  Tell her that you trust her and thinks its positive to have lots of friends of both genders, but texting, meeting behind your back, etc. is not something that wives and random dudes do if they are on the up and up.  If they are such great friends, he should come over to your crib to eat steaks and have beers with both of you.\n\nDont accept her acting shady.  You know as well as I do what is going on if she is shady.  Also, don't bite your tongue and be permissive because others tell you too.  You know in your gut if you are right or wrong.
17834
First you need to open up her sexuality by helping her see women as sexy.  If you have not went down on her yet...do so it might open her up more and take her out to a club or bar that you know has women willing to swing.  Get her drunk ...Get her kissed by another women ag it on...Get her to dance with other women and let her know how sexy you and every other guy in the place think she is...Then you will have her right where you wanted her...
794720
Yes and no, it depends on your wives feelings. If she doesnt like it and you continue to do it even though it hurts her alot then its not right. If she doesnt mind and is comfertable with letting you have female companions then its okay. Its honestly up to her.  If you value her feelings then you will do what makes her happy, just like she should do the same thing for you. What you need to do is ask yourself why you want female companionship. If you notice any of your motives might be disloyal then its not alright.
863077
Honey don't waste your time and energy being jealous and hurt over this.  You need to work on your own self esteem it seems.  Your energy would be better spent building your own self confidence.  And if this relationship you have with him is going to work it will have to include trust and communication.  If you had a problem with him going to a place like that you should not have made him believe otherwise only to bring it up later.  You say you don't think he would cheat so you must have some basis for believing he will be true to you.  And I can assure you if he is going to cheat it most likely will not be with the lap dancing stripper in front of everyone.  However, I certainly would question the solidity of what this relationship is based on now if I were you.  Doesn't sound like the actions of a man who respects your relationship to me  because regardless of his intentions his actions were very public and seemingly not terribly concerned how it looked.  Now you say he is going again even after you told him you were hurt by his actions. Does he respect you or not?  Do you really care?  You make sure you are confident and sure in who you are and what you stand for.  Walk proud and do not be swayed or controlled by the actions of anyone else.  I promise you any man will be more attracted to a confident woman who doesn't give a second thought to being jealous over such things as a juvenile boys will be boys outburst meant to boost his own ego.  You will be a much happier person and there will be far fewer nights spent home alone wondering what or who he is doing.  Take care of you and the rest will take care of itself. I promise.  I don't believe in jealousy.  It is  a waste of time and energy.
557666
No. What she has done is very inappropriate and in my mind, VERY selfish. I imagine she wouldn't like to be on the receiving end of such a thing should you have done that; am I right? Bottom line is this - it is not right for her to spend an evening like that with a man who is not her husband. Period! The mere fact that she kept this from you is an indication that what she did wasn't right. Deep down, she knew this would upset you and rightfully so. But if it were so harmless, she wouldn't have kept it from you in the first place. I think to help resolve this situation you should ask her what makes it "okay" for a married woman to do such a thing? I'd also ask her what makes her think that you should be "okay" with it as well?!
590679
You're a hetero man, that's what we do, it's in our nature.  You're not falling in love with who you're looking at right.  Nothing wrong with taking in a piece of little eye candy.\n\nNow the trick is not to get caught, not necessarily be sneaky about it, but you definately don't need to gauk, stair, be rude or disrespectful to your wife.\n\nI'm sure that you're wife checks out other guys when you go out albeit briefly, to where you don't notice or she does it in a way where it is not disrespectful to you.\n\nSo, if you'd like to avoid drama, keep the look time to a minimum (a glance or a scan of the landscape) just remember, that you are out with your wife not out with the guys or watching TV.  And if she starts talking to you, shut off the targeting device and pay attention to your wife.
1160555
i would hate it too i think that its just encourageing something bad to actaully happen- my hubby has people he works with who cheat and go to strip clubs and i know my hubbys gone with them and i hate it.....tell him how you feel but make sure he knows if you catch him without him telling you it will not be ok----
281921
I find something very wrong with it.  My husband actually DEMANDED that no strippers be at his bachelor party, without me even having to voice an opinion.  He's never been to a strip club either, no desire to do so.  He treats me like a queen, and I just love him to death.  That's the kind of man I married, one who respects women, and doesn't look at them as "objects" for him to drool over (whether it be for a night out or in daily life).  I would not have married a man who likes strippers any how.  They are out there, believe me.  One of my male friends is the same way -- no strippers for him.  It really boils down to the type of man you are marrying.  I was lucky enough to find a man who has no interest in strippers.  We're not religious or anything like that, we just want nothing to do with that part of society.  If you marry someone who shares the same values as you, than this shouldn't be an issue to you.
407426
Well its not cheating but it does fuel lust.\nI'm not saying its right , but its what men do..LIKE TO LOOK. \nStrippers are usually about the money and an ACT. \nMost strippers and I'm not saying all are lesbian and talk really bad about the men backstage of course. Especially when they tip bad. \nNot all clubs are actually allowing touching it depends on the state and area laws.\nIt obviously makes you feel uncomfortable.\nAsk if you can go with him to see what the club(s) are aboutt hat he goes to.\nIt may ease your mind or you will know if this is going to be a potential problem.\nKeep in mind when the money runs out usually so does the interest.\nTry stripping for him. \nYou can get more personal than strippers can.
1096725
lol is your girlfriend/wife going to one and you are researching? Well, I went to one on my 18th birthday, thanks to my friends. I know not all women feel the same way I do but I don't think there is anything sexy about male strippers! My friends and I went just to get a good laugh. Those banana hammock thongs are so gross! Most of the men are gay too. And touching, well, sometimes they make you, depends on the stripper. And full nudity? I don't think so but it may depend on your state. Don't worry, its all in fun.\n\nI went to a male review, yea, lots of touching. The men touch the women though.