My boyfriend has PTSD really bad. He is in Iraq and will not talk to anyone. What can I do?
494651
He needs therapy and medicine. And a lot of love and patience, if you can muster it. His reaction is common to battle experienced veterans. I'm not in the military, but I'm sure he has a military doctor he can consult with. \n  War is Hell. That is a fact, and every war is the same: Hell.  \n  Being shot is a horror. It's not something that anyone can get over quickly. \n  The best thing for him would be to get OUT of there ASAP and start therapy stateside. If that is possible.............. Battle induced PTSD does appear to lessen with time, but not in all cases. Prozac REALLY helps the condition. \n  Here are two sites that should be helpful: http://www.ncptsd.va.gov/ \nhttp://www.ptsdalliance.org/
872991
My best advice is to keep talking to your husband.  Focus on your feelings, but try not to be too harsh with him - too judgmental or controlling.  It doesn't work in the long run.  And while he's gone, it's going to be difficult to rebuild trust - counseling is necessary - there are a lot of steps to go through which probably can't be done while he's deployed.    \n\nBut, in the meantime, it's important that you feel understood.  If you have to, tell your husband that talking about it is part of the healing process, and that you'll probably bring the issue up more often than he likes.  And if he wants to help, the best thing he can do right now is listen and acknowledge your feelings.  \nAnd it doesn't hurt to read as much as you can about recovering from infidelity.  A good starting place is http://cheatingandinfidelity.com/\n\nHope this helps.
379265
Try to get him some help, hes been traumatized by that event and doesn't know how to express that. Good luck to you guys!!
688897
I am dating a guy in the AF also, but he is permanently stationed in the same state and not too far away. I know I would trust him if he had to be deployed, it is tough with their job. But if you have not heard from him it may be because he has found someone else. Try to call him and ask, never hurts to ask, hurts worse not knowing. Or if you have e-mail or Internet contact try that too. I know I love my guy very much and we either see each other 3-4x a week and if not we call each other everyday. I wish you the best, from Mary in Central NY
1129824
I'm not a single parent but I had to act as one while my husband was in Iraq.  I think that the hardest thing is not having someone to share the stress with.  People always asked me how I did it, I mean, I was pretty much a single mom while he was gone.  I always said the same thing, "I know my husband will be coming home.  I know I'll have help when his deployment is over.  I know that this is temporary.  Most importantly, I know, generally, around when my reinforcements (my hubby) will be arriving!"  I don't know how people do it when they don't have the knowledge of partner coming to help them soon.  I have an immense amount of respect for single parents.
355799
I am in IRAQ as i write this.I have seen my family and girlfriend 10 days since january 22 2005.I had the option of taking leave while being here but chose not to for the fact i didn't want to go through the goodbyes again.My girlfriend hates me being here but fully supports me by being there for me.I talk to her weekly on the phone and chat just about everyday on the computer.She has sent me numerous packages with "stuff" i cannot buy here.The problem i have with her is she refuses to go out at all during my absence. I told her this is not good and it only makes the waiting worse.There is nothing wrong with going out with her friends and family(she does go to her childrens house).Of course she does worry and tells me she sometimes cries herself to sleep.\n I believe the worst thing a wife or significant other can do is burden her man with menial or trivial problems that can be solved with a little time and thought.I assure you if the man had the choice he would rather be home watching his family and dealing with day to day issues.\n I have seen grown men "freak out" because of the minor problems being repeated to them from thier wives or girlfriend.During times like these maturing comes fast and hard for both people.The ones left home alone to do EVERYTHING around the house has to make all the decisions and then get used to the man coming home and trying to readjust to helping out again. The readjusting is the hardest part of coming home.now once again you must learn to accept that things will not always be done the way you have become acustomed.Just because your man is not away anymore doesn`t mean things get easier.Supporting him and he supporting you once back in the states is vital to every relationship.
728336
first of all, you should try to comfort him in any way possible. hold him and talk to him, try to pry out(in the nicest way possible) all the private information. then when you no all that is going on, then try to tell him that it will be ok and that you suport him. you're the only person he really trusts.
566469
Be supportive and understanding. He's not on a vacation. Patience is key and there will be times you'll want to speak with him and maybe he won't be able to give you the time you desire.Make what time you do have to speak with him quality time and don't expect quantity time then when you get it, it's a pleasant suprise.Try not to worry him over things he can't control while away. Handle as much as possible on your own. Being with someone in the military is different than other relationships. You play a very important role. You hold down the fort while he has to be gone...I wish you both the best...
637908
this needs professional understanding - i beleive your boyfreinds freind has a mental illness - if you are at all concerned with him maybe thinking of suicide - - please contact your local crisis care as soon as possible - if there is no local crisis care maybe suicide hotline - they will give you the information you need to deal with such a heavy situation - if you fear for yourself at all try talking to your boyfreind about him possibly visiting you instead - or talk to a trusted adult
32000
Go to your local church and talk to the pastor. Find a hobby sometimes doing for others in need helps us to feel better. I am a retired military wife so I know some of your feelings. First you need to understand you can't take care of others until you take care of you.Call your boyfriends Ombudsman see if there are any groups through his company that helps deal with your concerns. Listen to people around you see if there is anything you can help them with and just keep busy don't sit and think to much sometimes that is not always a good thing to do.
683722
Have you tried contacting his squadron, that would be your first bet to get into contact with him. His First Shirt would be the one to talk to. Don't call the Red Cross without contacting his unit first, it could cause problems in the future. Use his chain of command within the unit, they are there to support you while he is deployed.
135799
Write to him all the time! I'm sure he'll be happy to get your letters. And if he's engaged in Iraq or another high-stress zone spend time doing research on post-traumatic stress syndrome. You will be well equipped to lovingly guide him back into civillian life when he gets home. You don't want the wonderful feelings to fade when the reality of his war-fed deployment-induced emotional thirst comes in full-contact with your peace-fed warm and fuzzies. \nBest of luck! He's lucky to have a sweetie praying for him!
824355
support and him and tell him taht you want to be with him and don't want to give up...tell him you'll be here every step of the way..encourage him to seek a therapist who can help him...maybe give him a few days but tell him you're not going to leave for good...
643123
I am dealing with the same things you are.  This is _not_ something you can fix by yourself.  \n\nGo find a local VA outreach clinic and talk to a counselor.  \n\nI have PTSD myself - and have good days and bad days.  The trick is to learn how to recognize the signs and use techniques to 'turn off' alert status.\n\nOne thing to remember: you were injured.  You are _not_ crazy, you are _not_ a danger to anybody else.  \n\nContact me via email and we can discuss this further.  You are not alone, and there are ther people who understand exactly what you are going through because they have been there themselves.
1061378
Someone's ability to love you is not about you.  It's about them.\n\nGod doesn't love any of us because we're great.  He loves us because He is Love.  It's not about what we deserve or how worthy (or graciously, how unworthy) we are.\n\nOther people will love you because they can.  You have to work on getting to the place where you can let them.  It won't do you or them any good unless you are able to receive it.\n\nI have no idea what D.I.D.W.T.H is, but PTSD sounds likely to me.  \n\nCOUNSELOR, COUNSELOR, COUNSELOR.  I know it seems like we're stuck there, but you need someone to help you.  You deserve someone to help you.  PLEASE, let someone help you.\n\nI've been there.  I'm not there anymore.  There is hope.
6996
I would recommend a psych evaluation - s/he may be depressed, or maybe the trauma made the person react in this way when s/he normally would not.  either way, it doesn't sound safe, so someone professional should talk to him/her and find out how to keep the person safe until things improve!
691606
hey relax and dont try do sucide, thats not the way to end ur problems. Where as your partner is concerned you can talk to him about not talking about your past. If he really loves and cares for you, he'll understand. And if even then he doesn't stop then yes leave him. And dont worry no one is alone in this world, Keep faith in God, he'll help you out. As the saying goes "for every door closed another door opens". There are whole lot of people in the world, and many would also be facing the problem which you are, but that doesn't mean they'll sucide. And friendship is something which u can build very easily. So go out in the free world make frnds, be happy, dont look at your past. and Enjoy.\nFor that matter lets be friends?? whts say??