A ran away husband kept saying he did not have money to come back to see his own kids, tell me what you think?
485845
He ran away in the first place, in my opinion, makes one question his ability to be a good dad.  If he really wanted to see his kids, he'd have found a way. \nHe's a dead-beat dad in my opinion.
556851
Oh sweety, told you told you told you?? You can't believe all this. You should have told him from the second he said he was leaving "ok, i'll be here for you once you get everything sorted out." He might leave his wife, but my gut like urs is saying he's a lier and he's not planning on leaving his wife. When the week is up, his time is up too.
550712
Run for the hills, your kids and you deserve betterr than what your man has to offer...lets say one day you make tons of money, do you want your man to leach off you the rest of your life. Your kids deserve the best in this world...life is precious, i commend you for trying so hard to live the American Dream...Ditch the zero and get with a hero!!!\n\nGood Luck, Jo Jo
596505
I could never put my children out but this is what I did with one lazy 19 year old.  He came home from a hard day of running around to find he had nothing in his room but a pillow and one cover.  Since he paid no bills, he wasn't allowed to use my electric, my air conditioning, his stereo, NOTHING.  He was allowed to sleep in his room from 10:00 P.M. until 8:00 A.M.  The rest of the time he was not allowed in the house.  He was allowed to eat breakfast, get a drink of water and use the head before he left.  When he was able to pay me $5.oo per week, he regained his room 24 hrs.  When He was able to pay me $5.00 more per week. he got back his stereo and T.V.  He took three weeks to tell me he had a job (at MacDonald's).  Before the month was over he was able tp pay me $20.00 per week to have his normal room back.  I put all the money in an account for him and 6 months later  he had a down payment on a car.  Now he has a better job (construction), a girl friend he can afford and a car with insurance.  I believe that he hated me at first, but now, every once in a while, he says, Poppa, thanks for making me get up off my butt.  Things are so much more enjoyable.
251968
This really depends on the exact reason he left like the others said.  My opinion would be if you truly wanted him back.  No man should leave his family because he is having some personal life changing issue.  My husband and I have literally been to hell and back and not once have we ever walked out on each other.  The key is open communication.  You obviously didn't have enough open communication for him to just leave.  My husband and I talk through everything.  We always keep our kids in mind when making any life changing decisions.  Kids are too young to understand and more often than not will blame themselves for what has happend with their parents.  \n\nIf he comes back or more importantly, if you decide to allow him back after this, you both need to have a very long talk and seek some sort of counseling.  Either professional or through a church.  He seems to be too young to have to walk out or leave his family.  In my opinion, he either wasn't ready for his family, or he is too self centered to care about how you and the children would react to it.  You MUST have an open relationship!  For better or for worse!  Isn't that what you said when you go married.  He should have thought about that then.  \n\nYou shouldn't put up with it.  If I were you, I would have a change of life yourself.  Two can play the game.  Keep your head up and don't let this get you down.  Let him see you are not concerned with the fact that he is gone and that you are perfectly capable of doing it on your own.  I'm not saying it will be easy, but look at your kids and know that no matter what you will never leave them and you will be there for them until the day you die.  That will pull you through.  \n\nI pray for the best for you.  Good luck and God Bless Y'all!!
272905
I wouldn't worry about hurting his feelings. I would never go out everyday and work my butt off knowing he was at home doing nothing. That would make me so mad I'd kick his rear end out. Either he gets a job or gets out. I can't see one person supporting the whole family. It isn't fair at all. Just tell him you can't do it all on your own anymore. Exspecially when you are expecting your second child. When you are off of work for a while where's he going to get his money from then.
127165
It depends, do you want to raise your children, or pay someone else to raise them? Do you really need the money or just want the money? Discuss it with your husband! Good luck.
231648
I personally do not need the money not that I am rich but my husband and myself make enough to pay the bills and feed the kids and what more can one really ask for. My parents on the other hand are having a hard time finacially since my dad retired. I have been trying to help but with 3 kids of my own I cant always help them as much as i would like.So I guess I am asking for them.
458542
I am so sorry!  I know this has to be painful and devastating.  Did you suggest marriage counseling to him?  If you have and he refuses, then he really doesn't want to work it out....which means he has someone else or wants to be "single" again.  If you haven't suggested it, please do.\n\nIf he feels this way and refuses to seek help, then you would be further ahead to divorce him.  It will be too traumatic to your kids and you to try to save a relationship where one of the parties doesn't want to save it.\n\nI hope you can find some true happiness for your children and yourself.
603216
Sweetheart, I went through years of hell with a man just like that; I stayed for my kids, and threw my life away.  I waited till the youngest was 15, then left.  My kids ALL said "what the hell took you so long- why didnt you leave him years ago", and when I said I had stayed for them, they called me all kinds of stupid, because they had been really unhappy and ashamed because everyone knew their father was a lush. I am 65 now, and just getting my life back.  What you have there is a self-centred, cold, thoughtless bastard who doesnt give a damn about you or the kids, hon, or he wouldnt treat you like a walking paypacket/ servant.  If you gave up your job and stayed at home what would he call you when he couldn't afford his drink and drugs?? YOU HAVE A LIFE; he has ruined his, dont let him ruin your OR your kids Get out of there girl; wheres YOUR anchor- he thinks its in your head, doesnt he? What this guy needs is an anchor tied round his neck and a swimming lesson.  Be brave; the first step is the hardest, but you can do this; do it for your kids, and do it for YOU.  God bless and keep you, and good luck in the great future you have waiting for you.
246861
your husband sounds like a loser\ni think you need to leave him for someone who will come home to you
977390
400 a month for supporting his child ...he thinks it's to much?? clothing ,food, home, electric and everything it takes to raising a child ? that's cheap ..he should talk to the lawyer who handled the case during divorce if he has a problem
319485
Let's see...you married a man who had failed at 5 marriages before you, right? And I assume it was always the woman's fault that the marriage went south, right? I suggest that you have learned, hopefully, a very expensive lesson...people do not change, regardless of how much you want them to. I am sorry, but where were you when all this money was disappearing? Where were you when he was living high on your expense account. Your were "smitten??" I think the proper word for it is, "you lost your mind." NOw, pay your bills and go one with life. Not much else you can do. But I would hope that your are much wiser in the "from now on" than you have been in the "way back then."
479043
sorry don't know an answer to this but I just wanted to say my heart goes out to you. I have a prem baby and I know how financially draining it can be. \nHas your wife tried appealing to this guys better nature by explaining the situation to him and asking if there is a compromise you could come to?
324856
Sunflower- hon don't feel bad about that! You need him to come home- your kids need him to come home! I think it is a shame the Govt. doesn't pay for it! God wants them to help you! It is ok sweetie! If I had money I would send it to you too! I know how much you all miss him- he misses ya'll! I thank God for people helping you! I hope he comes home soon- tell him I said Thank-you for all he does for us! I appreciate HIM! Bye, have a lovely day! cloeen
432415
Well it sounds like he has already emotionally abandoned the relationship, so who is to blame you for phyiscally abandoning the relationship?  I think you should do it before he leaves, though.  His running away (literally!) is really just a passive-agrressive way of forcing you to make a decision and be the "bad guy" for leaving when he's gone.  What a wimp!  Demand closure now, before he goes so you can get on with your life and tie up any loose legal entanglements.  You don't want him running up huge debts on his world-wide jaunt that you will be paying off, either.  What a selfish bastard!
116019
I haven't but sometimes i think about it.When me & hubby are fighting and kids are really trying me. The reason  id leave them with him is cause he would be able to provide bettter for them on his own. I have no skills and would only make minimum wage. And in todays time Its not possible to support 3 kids while making minimum wage.