Is honesty and fidelity possible in a cyber relationship?
479994
I think it depends on how you approached the whole idea in the first place. Say, for example that your initial reason for venturing into cyber-space was to "find" someone: all of your motives now become suspect because you're motivated to say whatever is required (much of which is likely to be untrue) to get what you want. Not to mention the very obvious question of why you are having difficulty finding someone within your real day to day world. Not a good beginning, and not much to work with. Conversely, however, let's say your experiences were such that you were tired of chasing body part after body part, realized that those decisions were superficial, and that what was needed was a chance to connect with positive people doing positive things and expressing positive ideas, then the anonymity of cyber-space frees you from the snares of judging things based on trappings you know have no substance. Now you're a person hungry to listen: you're ready to meet a woman's mind and you're open to what she's about. Assuming what she tells you is the truth and that you're doing likewise, it would be easy to at least begin to fall in love with that type of connection sight unseen. Lying would be self-defeating; sabotaging what you came here for. Distance then becomes less relevant, because it's now less about sex and more about really loving someone. Someone answered that it was possible but not probable; I actually agree with her, because it depends on the motivations of the people involved. But for a certain type of people, or specifically, people at a certain stage in their development, I have to believe it could work just fine. It is, at least, as good a place to start as any.
627213
Yes they are!I am with one! And have been with him for ten years.Sometimes they are so honest and so blunt it hurts!!!But they will always tell you the way it is if you ask them!!!Be ready to hear the truth!My also man believes if you dont have honesty and trust their is no reason to be together!Honesty is very important to them!
1105159
Anything that has to do with sexual stimulation with another person that is not your significant other is cheating. Also, don't do unto others what you wouldnt want done to you. If your bf had cybersex , you wouldn't like it. \n\nRules of Thumb to consider: \n- Are you doing something you wouldn't want your partner to know about?\n- Are you keeping your cyber lover a secret?\n- Are you engaging in an activity you would hesitate to do in front of your real-life beloved? \nGenerally speaking, if any of these apply, the action could either be considered cheating or at the very least, damaging to your relationship. If you don't want your partner to know about your online attractions, then you should rethink your actions. \nIn effect, your real-life mate is the deciding factor. Ask yourself, “What perspective does my partner have about cyber sex?” If he or she feels betrayed, then there's the answer. \n\nSeveral red flags to consider:\n- Is there an emotional attachment to your cyber "friend?" \n- Do you look forward to "speaking" with this person?\n- Is your online relationship taking time away from your beloved? \nIf any of these apply, you may want to analyze your true intentions. Ask yourself, “Is this cyber communication a replacement for what I feel I am missing from my real partner?” Many cyber sex participants have admitted to participating in this activity because their sex life has fallen short of their expectations. If your cyber relationship is taking time away from your beloved, it’s time to decide, who is your priority.
212519
Yes, there is SUCH a thing as a 'connection.' I met a buddy online, I have never met him in person, he lives in another country, and over the 6 years we have been chatting we have learned a great deal from each other, he can even tell when I'm having a bad just by my style of writing.  We have exchanged family pictures through the course of the 6 years, we have grieved, rejoiced and celebrated many wonderful events, all through the YAHOO medium.  And sex was never an issue, it was never first nor foremost in our relationship.  We exchanged many stories regarding sexual content, but it was never what kept us together as friends.\n\nI also have a wonderful online connection with my college sweetheart, he writes and chats with me, going on 4 years now.  Yes, we reminisce about the OLD days, but again, sex is not the issue, we share a common connection, the past.\n\nMy current partner, and I have a wonderful connection, we have grown together through the bad times and good times, compromising for the best.  I think the key is patience.  The person you are meant to be with, will eventually come your way, don't force it--it will happen eventually either online or in real life.\n\nGood Luck and prosper...;*!*;...
95738
*Noddling for I think so* I personally am in a long term relationship with someone I met one night on yahoo dominos. Heh she decided my nickname was perverted (it was, but that was not why I used it in dominos) and decided to come to my table to tease me and see if she could catch me being a perv.\n\n*Grinning wolfishly* She couldn't and due to the fact I turned her down, she decided she liked me and made sure we stayed in contact. Over the course of time, my reason for saying no was no longer valid and I found myself in love...\n\nAs to finding nice, honest people and where, lol there is no easy answer. They are everywhere, in chats, playing games, even probably here in answers...\n\nThe trick is weeding out the not so good ones, till you find one worthy of your trust...
301576
Honestly, cheaters are cheaters.  Even if these things did not mean anything, which they likely didn't sicne they are in cyber world, he would probably mess with  them if he had the chance.  If they live nearby, it is probably just a matter of time before he gets with them.> Sounds to me like he likes flirting with danger, and unfortunately, most times people get swept away by the games they play.
830218
Yes please! The sooner the better I say! So many times I ask myself how much hurt could be avoided if men/women were honest and up front with their intent?
650725
Yes, I have had one for 3 years with the same woman.\n\nWe have four beautiful cyber children and a virtual dog!\n\nWe are curious to meet but why risk such a beautiful thing.  Maybe once our kids have grown up and left the Internet we will try it
1083106
Can you even have true love over email?
1005109
Ask yourself if you can trust her. If you can't, regardless of if she is truly being honest or not, then how can you have a healthy relationship? It sounds like there have been issues with trust with her in the past, and games to make each other jealous. Is that the kind of relationship you want to have?
630775
Well, that's a hard one.\n\nOf course I would want to know.  Honesty is the most important part of a relationship.\n\nHowever, if the person has cheated, I would have a hard time sticking to the marriage plans.  I don't tolerate cheaters.  Or liars for that matter.
1138650
I'm sure that it can. I have heard of cases. It depends how much each person cares and wants to stick it out.\n\nThe cheater has to be very patient and understand that they have to deal with a lot of pain and anger from the person they hurt. Many serious talks will have to happen. A lot of people cannot handle this.\n\nThe cheatee (person cheated on) will have to learn to forgive and trust that person again. This is extremely difficult to do but it can be done.
209296
Please be very careful, what you may read in or hear, isn't what you may get. Online words, are just words. How do you know you can trust this person, they already know what you desire, or what you want just from chatting with you, the person could be saying all things that you want to see and hear but it may not be real. Just don't jump to fast, marriage is a big step, a commitment. Please slow down and have him slow, for both parties to make sure this is what you really want. I wish you luck and happiness.
759749
I don't think it's what two people do - computers versus, say, crocheting potholders or whatever - that has an impact on a relationship as much as their common philosophy does.  If you both share a common view of the world, of morality, of what you believe, there's a chance that it can develop into love. \n\nAnd you can love someone for years without telling them.  It happens all the time.......
1112359
If the relationship is going to have a future be honest. It's something taht should be said, but not until you have established a trusting relationship.
356379
I have.  We met through an internet dating site.  We corresponded through email at first, then on the phone, and a short time later we met in person.  Not long after, we fell in love.\n\nI have every reason to believe this relationship is going all the way.  House, marriage, kids...  and he would agree completely.\n\nHere's some tips if you're seeking love through the net:  \n-Be completely honest.  \n-Don't waste time pretending to be someone or something you're not.  \n-If the person you're chatting with doesn't seem to be everything you're looking for, don't waste time giving them a chance (I know it sounds mean, but how much time do you have to waste anyway?)\n\nNever settle for anything less than what you deserve.
480642
Well, lets start by saying 2 of my cuzz met their soulmates from chatrooms are are still very much in love.I personally met mine from there too.Yeah, people can lie abt everything on the net but you gotta meet them in the flesh.And you just take it from there, if it doesnt work, move on.Lets face it, the guys n gals we meet outside sometimes don't work out either..Just go with the flow and most importantly, follow your heart.