How can I get my husband to trust me again?
462112
The problem with the past is that even though it's over it's never forgotten.  Try more open communication and maybe even counseling.
872991
My best advice is to keep talking to your husband.  Focus on your feelings, but try not to be too harsh with him - too judgmental or controlling.  It doesn't work in the long run.  And while he's gone, it's going to be difficult to rebuild trust - counseling is necessary - there are a lot of steps to go through which probably can't be done while he's deployed.    \n\nBut, in the meantime, it's important that you feel understood.  If you have to, tell your husband that talking about it is part of the healing process, and that you'll probably bring the issue up more often than he likes.  And if he wants to help, the best thing he can do right now is listen and acknowledge your feelings.  \nAnd it doesn't hurt to read as much as you can about recovering from infidelity.  A good starting place is http://cheatingandinfidelity.com/\n\nHope this helps.
497377
If he doesnt trust you, you should dump him... Its pathic and controlling if he doesnt trust you after 2 years and you claim to have never done anything to make him not trust you. Or sit and talk with him about how it makes you feel..
116591
the only way you can regain trust is both parties are willing to put what ever the problem was in the past and not ever bring it up again. And I'm sorry to say that is a hard thing to do. Anytime a argument comes up and if its on the sme lines as the problem it will come up again, and again,and again. But If the both of you want trust back then you'll work on it,but it wont be easy.
566491
It sounds to me that he has not regained the level of trust that you all had at another place in time.\nYou might try asking him, kindly and calmly, what it will take for you to re-birth that original trust.\nIt is a most important foundational building block for any relationship, and if you don't straighten it out NOW...you can build a leaning tower of Pisa in 20 years that won't support you emotionally or otherwise.\nAbove all, don't be tearful, that is unfair when dealing with men, they can't handle it at all and it is more like playing them, quite frankly!  So be centered and be up front with him. He will appreciate it more.  Good Luck!
230211
I guess this happens in alot of marriages!From what I have been reading.It has happened in mine,also!And now My husband and I can talk openly about it,even joke about it!But that takes time.As long as you love him.And he loves you!That is all that matters!The past is the past,hun.Let it be that.I know it's hard!And I know you'll think about it.But in time,the hurt will get less.And your trust will grow back in time,too!I always tell my husband,that I have forgiven him BUT I will Never forget.And he reminds me about what I have done.But we don't argue about it any longer.Because,it has been a while.And time heals.I know that cheating isn't right.But sometimes when you get together real young it's really hard to stay faithful.There is ALOT of temptations out there.And it takes two.Also,NoOne is perfect.And then some people say once a cheater always a cheater,but I do Not believe this either.Because we may have made mistakes in our past.But I feel that both my husband and I have learned from them.And it will never happen again.It sounds as though,your hubby and you have learned from yours too!Good-Luck to both of you!
357900
You can't when ever you try to be intimate you will think he is thinking of someone else and you will never be able to trust him. You could look on the bright side that you aren't married to him. You have to think more of yourself and tell yourself that you deserve someone who will be faithful.The first time he cheats and hurts you it's not your fault. The fault comes when you let him have a chance to cheat again. And im sorry to say once a cheat always a cheat. If he loved you so much he could betray you once he will betray you again. Good luck
737714
Honetly, how I would get him back is by dumping him, if he doesn't trust you now, he never will and he will keep accusing you of the same thing.\n\nif he thinks you would do this after whatever length of time you have been together he doesn't know you at all and isn't worth the hassle.\n\nif you do want to stick with him, tell him that the next time he accuses you of doing something like that you will make sure that he actually has some proof to go on...in the mean time wax his balls :)
293903
If he was able to do that, and with somebody so close, he will easily do it again.  If you really WANT to make it work anyway (and I'm all for forgiveness in the right circumstances), then it's up to him to do everything it takes to make you feel secure that nothing else will ever go on with anyone else. He would have to want your marriage bad enough to do that of course, because it will be alot of work on his part.\nIf he's not willing to be totally open and accountable for every action, then do not put yourself through the abuse of more affairs. He has already broken your marriage covenant, and you are not bound to him.
692413
It will be a rough ride but you will have to accommendate the spouse until they feel they can trust you again.  This will include telling them where you are, what you will be doing and hearing the infraction over and over again until they feel you are trustworthy again. \n\nIt will not be easy.
221000
It depends: do you have faith in him? You need to consider what happened with your last relationship. Was it something he did? Was it something you did? Try to figure that out first. That way, if you do choose to start over, you can fix it.\n\nNext, decide if your relationship can be salvaged at all at this point. Has too much gone wrong between you? If so, then make a clean break. Or can you be together without getting too awkward? Do you think there's too much pain, or do you think you can be together without having what went wrong throbbing in your heart each day? If so, then you may be able to save your relationship.\n\nAnd finally, do you want to start over as friends? So far, your husband's intentions and attempt seem genuine; it seems that he really wants to save your relationship by going back to the beginning and fixing the things that went wrong the first time around. Are you willing to go back to square one? And are you ready for if it doesn't work out?\n\nIf you choose to do this, then I think he's right when he says to take it slow. It would be hard, and expecting everything to fix itself quickly would make it harder; it's expecting too much. Chances are, it might even take longer than the first time around because last time, there wasn't the awkwardness or discomfort of a marriage gone down. It's risky, and it won't be easy.\n\nWhatever you choose, good luck and I wish you the very best.
157820
Slowly get him to trust you enought to open up to him.  Talk to him.
115447
It is human nature not to trust someone that has hurt you that bad.   It is hard to work through that pain,  You will never trust each other like you did before.  Realize that and accept the fact you both have cheated.\n\nNow you need to move beyond it.  Forget trust, and stop worrying.  Concentrate on the reasons that you both want to stay together.  Rebuild your relationship on thse reasons.  If it's for the kids, make the kids the center of your life.  If it's because you still love each other, concentrate on that.  \n\nNow go to counselling.
657439
Do you think that you'll ever be able to trust him again?  Is he changed?  Is he sorry that he cheated on you?
330618
You have every reason to feel hurt. The question you have to ask yourself is... do you really think that you can get over the past. Do you really think that he has put the past behind him? If you answer no to either one of these questions, then no, you will never be able to trust your husband again. I've been in your place and stayed with my husband for 10 more years, in the end, I cheated on him numerous times because I couldn't get over the fact that I believed he had cheated on me. A night while laying next to him in bed, I would have images of him with her... Or when he would touch me in a way that should be considered loving, I would wonder if he touched her in the same way. It is hard to get over the thought of someone you love, cheating on you and you end up building a wall between you.  Sit down and talk to your husband, calmly. Let him know what you found, and that it wasn't because you were snooping. You have to get your feelings out on the table and see how he responds to it, then together decide if you are able to rebuild the trust that was broken.
835581
I would visit www.survivinginfidelity.com.  In my opinion if she wants to keep you and rebuild your trust, she has to STOP seeing him and prove to you that she is committed to making your marriage work.  I wish you luck, it doesn't sound good.
322805
If you don't trust him, you need to ask yourself if you should be in this relationship.  My husband has lazy moments too but it would never cross my mind for a second that he'd cheat on me.