can you tell me a joke?
461005
A boss and 3 employees working in his office, went to a beach one day.\nthey find a allauddin lamp. all 4 gets exited and rubs the lamp, out of which allauddin comes out.\nAllauddin thanked all 4 and tells them that he can fulfill a wish of all 4 members...\n\none employee says "I want to be in a place , where i find all nude girls dancing with me all the day",..allauddin says "ok" and the employee vanishes from the place.\n\n2nd employee says "i want to be in a room filled with full of american dollars"..allauddin says "ok" and the employee vanishes.\n\n3rd employee says "i want a big house, 2 nice wives, 2 big cars, and a room full of money"...allauddin says "ok" and the employee vanishes...\n\nOnly the boss is left now, and he is very serious with his employees.\nAllauddin asks the boss abt his wish...then the angry boss says "i want those 3 idiots back in my office tomorrow"
452212
What has the world come to? People don't seem to make good clean jokes any more (keyword: good)! Sheesh...\n\nHere's one:\n\nA pregnant woman gets into a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly 6 months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby. \n\nThe doctor replies, "Ma'am, you had twins! A boy and a girl. The babies are fine. Your brother came in and named them." \n\nThe woman thinks to herself, "Oh no, not my brother -- he's an idiot!" \n\nExpecting the worst, she asks the doctor, "Well, what's the girl's name?" \n\n"Denise," the doctor says. \n\nThe new mother thinks, "Wow, that's not a bad name! Guess I was wrong about my brother. I like Denise!" \n\nThen she asks the doctor, "What's the boy's name?" \n\nThe doctor replies, "DeNephew" \n\n:o)
25322
There was a scientific research project into the world's funniest joke, this is the result:\n\nTwo hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services. \n\nHe gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"
1142158
its a long blonde joke..\n\ntwo brunettes and a blonde are running from three cops. they gain to about a mile ahead & the only thing in site is an abandoned barn. the first brunette says lets hide here, theres no where else to go. so all three of them go in there. there is nothing in the barn but some old burlap sacks & the brunette goes, lets hide in here.\n\nsoon after the cops come into the abandoned barn to find nothing but burlap sacs. the first cop goes, there is nothing in here but burlap sacks, i don't think they are in here. so as he exits he kicks the first burlap sack & the first brunette goes "meow" the cop says, see its only a cat.\n\nthe second cop says, yeah your right they arent in here. so he kicks the second burlap sack & the second brunette goes "ruff" & the cop goes, nothing but a dog.\n\nthe third cop says what in here? and he sees the third burlap sack moving around. he uses his flashlight to see inside of it & he kicks it, and hears the blonde yell " POTATOES!"
847459
LOL that was a good one and for once it wasn't to long to read sometimes i can never be bothered to finish the joke coz there so long!\nThanks for the laugh xx
24427
there are many such as www.joke.com\njust type in joke in a serch engine and you'll have a bunch.
1025507
bc u told that joke hahaha :/
801470
Make a joke about it and laugh it off--
993810
Look, these are not just jokes, but oh well.\n\nWhat goes up and never comes down?\nYour age. \n\nKnock, Knock... \n- Knock, knock.\n- Who's there?\n- Arthur.\n- Arthur who?\n- Arthur any better jokes than this?\n\nWhy can't centipedes play soccor?\nBy the time the put on a shield for their last leg, the game is over\n\nKnock knock.\nWho's there?\nYa.\nYa who?\nWhat are you so excited about?\n\n1. What is the easiest way to throw a ball, have it stop, and completely reverse direction after traveling a short distance? \n2. What is at the beginning of eternity, the end of time, the beginning of every end, and the end of every place? \n3. When things go wrong, what can you always count on? \n4. What is always behind you but you can never touch it? \n5. I am never the first to speak but I am always the last to be heard. Who am I? \n6. We were born of the same mother, on the same day, at the same hour and in the same year. Yet we are not twins. How do you explain this? \n7. Two fathers and two sons were seated round a table. There were four apples on the table. Each of them took one apple and ate it entirely yet there was still one apple left on the table. How was this possible? \n8. Before Mount Everest was discovered which was the highest mountain in the world? \n9. Here everything is not always in order. For example, Friday comes before Thursday, the cart comes before the horse, the driver comes before the employer. Where are we? \n10. When I am alive I stay put where I am. It is only when I am dead that I move about here and there. Who am I? \n11. How can you be behind a person when that person is also behind you? \n\nAnswers below.\n1. Throw the ball straight up \n2. 'e' \n3. Your fingers \n4. The past \n5. An echo. \n6. They are triplets. \n7. There were only three persons at the table comprising a grandfather, his son and his grandson. \n8. Mount Everest, of course. It was always there! \n9. In a dictionary. \n10. A leaf. \n11. Put yourself back to back of each other. \n\n1. There are six eggs in the basket. Six people each take one egg. How can it be that one egg is left in the basket?\n\n2. Acting on an anonymous phone call, the police raid a house to arrest a suspected MURDERER. They don't know what he looks like, but they know HIS name in John. Inside they find a carpenter, a lorry driver, a car mechanic, and a fireman all playing cards. Without even asking his name, they arrested the fireman. How do they know they've got their man?\n\n3. Three of the glasses are filled with orange juice; the other three are empty. By moving only ONE glass, can you arrange them so the full and empty glass alternate?\n\n4. There was once a recluse who never left his home. The only time anyone ever visited him was when the food and supplies were delivered, but they NEVER came inside. Then, one stormy winter night when an icy gale was blowing, he had a nervous breakdown. He went upstairs, turned off all the lights and went to bed. Next morning, he had caused deaths of several hundred people. HOW?\n\n1. She takes the basket as well with the last egg still in it.\n\n2. He is the only man - all the others are woman.\n\n3. Take the second glass from the left, pour its contents into the fifth glass from the left then return it to it's original position.\n\n4. He is a lighthouse keeper.\n\n5.The mailman did it, because there is no mail on Sunday.\n\nTongue Twisters\nIf you understand, say "understand". If you don't understand, say "don't understand". But if you understand and say "don't understand".How do I understand that you understand? Understand!\n\n\n\nI wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.\n\n\n\nSounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds. \n\n\n\nA sailor went to sea to see, what he could see. And all he could see was sea, sea, sea.\n\n\n\nPurple Paper People, Purple
977574
LOVED the joke.  Haven't heard (or read) such a funny joke is ages!!!
785936
Oh sh*t, you've got some good ones.  Thanks!  You're a 10 in the joke department.
958120
Brilliant joke you are very funny!
432807
Is this a real quetion or a joke. Its not very funny.
354838
Hilarious....what are you trying to say?
849770
Giggle (small one). I've heard it before but we need more clean jokes like that :)
866999
Real Funny.\n\nRead this one\n\nThe Deaf Genie\n\nA man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and places the\nbag on the counter.\n\nThe bartender walks up and asks what's in the bag.\n\nThe man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about one\nfoot high, and sets him on the counter. He reaches back into the bag\nand pulls out a small piano, setting it on the counter as well.\n\nHe reaches into the bag once again and pulls out a tiny piano bench,\nwhich he places in front of the piano.\nThe little man sits down at the piano and starts playing a beautiful\npiece by Mozart!\n\n"Where on earth did you get that?" says the bartender.\n\nThe man responds by reaching into the paper bag.\nThis time he pulls out a lamp. He hands it to the bartender and\nsays..."Here. Rub it."\n\nSo the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a gust of smoke\nand a beautiful genie is standing before him.\n\n"I will grant you one wish. Just one wish...each person is allowed only one!"\n\nThe bartender gets really excited.\n\nWithout hesitating he says, "I want a million bucks!"\n\nA few moments later, a duck walks into the bar.\nIt is soon followed by another duck, then another.\nPretty soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks and they keep coming!\n\nThe bartender turns to the man and says, "Y'know, I think your genie's\na little deaf...I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks."\n\n"Tell me about it!!" says the man...\n\n"Do you really think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?"\n\nBYE - Imtiyaz G
344537
There's a section for jokes dude, recategorize your question