How does bullying affect the way kids live?
468464
My nefew gets tesed real bad. He won't even talk to anyone he don't have no friends cuz once one starts they all start. He is all depressed he don't care about school anymore and he blames himself. He thinks its something wrong with him when in reality its problems the bully has with himself. Kids can be so mean.  I'm not saying it's right but bullies is the reason Colinbin  sp?? school shooting happened.
293417
It depends on what "FRIENDS" you have. There can be positive and negative effects on what FRIENDS influence us. Positive- ur able 2 develp healthy friendships & peer relationships depends on a teen's self-identity, self-esteem, and self-reliance. Negative- peer pressure can impair good judgment and fuel risk-taking behavior, drawing a teen away from the family and positive influences and luring into dangerous activities: ALCOHOL, DRUG USE, SEXUAL BEHAVIOR, etc.
1168216
Here are some things for you to keep in mind, and share the appropriate parts with him.  It is part of an answer I did a while ago for someone who was being bullied .....\n\nIn dealing with a bully, do be assertive, but the child being bullied is not usually strong enough to fight the bully physically ... bullies don't pick on kids who are stronger than them. \n\nBullies don't go away. It is true that bullies are cowards, and tend to back down when people stand up to them, but bullies also seek revenge. Unless bullies are stopped, they tend to get worse and worse, not better. \n\nMost schools have someone you can go to so that some adult will know about what's happening and can begin to stop it - a guidance counselor, a teacher you trust, the principal, someone. Can you go to the bully's parents and tell them? If the bully has actually attacked the child, go to the police. The bully can be charged. This is not a laughing matter. No matter what the bully has said about not telling anyone, TELL. Here are some well researched tips on dealing with bullying:\n\n1. If you are bullied, TELL. Telling is not being weak or being a coward or tattling. It is helping to protect everyhone from that bully.\n2. Tell someone you trust - teacher, counselor, parent, some other adult. You CANNOT handle this yourself. \n3. Do not retaliate or get angry. This could make things worse.\n4. Respond evenly and firmly or say nothing and walk away.\n5. develop good strong friendships and support each other. Bullies tend to pick on kids that they think don't have many friends or kids thye think others won't hlep.\n6. Act confident.\n7. Try to stay away from places the bully will be if that is possible. For example, take a different route to school.\n8. Avoid unsupervised areas of the school.\n9. Try not to bring expensive items to school that might attract the bully's attention and that he might try to take or break.\n10. To gain confidence and feel stronger and feel that youcan take care of yourself, enrol in a self-defnece program if one is available, or a martial arts program or something like that. Self defence programs teach you some very good skills, very quickly.\n11. Join a group, such as Scouts, a cadet program, or something like that, so that you have a special group of friends. \n\nGo to the website www.bullying.co.uk/ which has lots of information for parents and for kids about bullying and about some things you can do. I think this website might really help you figure out some good positive things you can do to deal with this.\n\n\nI hope this answer has something of value in it for you.
523010
Do not let it bother you.  People who bully are having emotional problems themselves.  Adolescence is notorious for this because there are alot of changes both emotionally and physically and adolescents do not deal well with them...they also have major brain changes going on making them not exactly considerate of others.  While not letting it bother you is harder done than said.....remember it will pass.  I do recommend getting a hobby and new friends. Try soccer, or art. Join an after school club maybe.  I do not recommend weight lifting like the other guy said...i know some adult guys with screwed up shoulders from weight lifting too early...and 7th grade is too early.  If it is any consulation....i am now much cooler than those kids that picked on me in middle school...and much happier.  And my school has been totally paid for in college and graduate school.  Life is not over in middle school.
46081
The answers to your question is very uncomfortable, because it casts this culture (and others that tolerate it) in a very bad light.\n\n1. For one, I hate to say it but in some ways bullying is seen as socially acceptable. If you listen to some adults (especially those whose children are accused of being bullies), they will say things like "Bullying is good, because it teaches the weak how to defend themselves." Or they'll say that bullying teaches good *social skills*, because it prepares children for the Real World, which is harsh and cruel. In other words, what I'm saying is that the educational system in some way condones this type of behavior, since many people in some ways hold these beliefs (even teachers and faculty).\n\n2. Adults continue to insist that bullying is a cute, harmless activity amongst children. You know the old saw-- "kids will be kids." So when they see bullying, they don't see harrassment, torture, stalking, cruelty and torment. They see boys displaying their *crushes* on girls; they see *roughhousing.* They see friendly teasing. It's like adults still live in this time warp where all boys are doing are dipping girls' pigtails into inkwells, and all girls are doing are sticking their tongues out at each other. Since adults form the educational system, they literally turn a blind eye to it all and pretend that it's simply harmless teasing.\n\n3. Many bullies are such master manipulators, that they are able to convince teachers and administrators that they are the nicest kids on the planet.\n\n4. Adults feel that bullying is a *natural phase* of childhood. So why do anything about it?\n\n5. Lastly, when bullying happens, the school faculty takes this stance that it's none of its business if children are harassed. It's job is to merely just *teach.* Anything else that happens under their nose is the child's problem. As a result, nothing is done about it.\n\nSad to say, but it's true.
427422
Of course your child should come first! You cannot always let a child make the decisions eg: should we have biscuits or ham for dinner?? :)\n\nIn a case where bullying, harrassment etc is involved the childs basic right to be treated fairly is paramount. Ideally, I fell it should be the child carrying out the bullying who should have to go through the upset of the move but if there is no other option then I back your opinion on moving. \n\nIt is hard enough for a child to put up with bullying in school but if he feels that his pleas for help to his parents are falling on deaf ears it will really drive him to the edge. I would recommend that you all sit down and try to explain the situation to the father. You should also have a serious chat with your child. If he is going to the extremes of trying to slit his wrists you really need to act fast.\n\nMight I suggest also bringing this to the principal of the school in question. Surely they should be able to do something more. Explain the devistating resluts that the torture is having on your boy and get them to act. If needs be threaten them with legal action if you dont see them making an effort to stamp out this behaviour.\n\nGive your boy a cuddle from me. I was bullied when I was at school and sometimes it can be very hard to get over.
885702
nice one\ni guess its because they cant face them \nthey get scared\nat times they cant face situation\nhmm..\ni used to get bullied\nbut now \nI CAN FACE THEM!!!
386173
OMG!  How did you get through high school?  Teens have been bullies for YEARS!!!  All kidding aside, just think of Columbine and the effects of ridicule are just the tip of the iceberg.
85205
Hmmmm .... be careful about some of the advice yu have been given here.  Some of it is good ... do be assertive, but your friend is probably not strong enough to fight the bully physically ... bullies don't pick on kids who are stronger than them.  Bullies don't go away.  It is true that bullies are cowards, and tend to back down when people stand up to them, but bullies also seek revenge.  I don't know how old you and your friend are, but this problem needs to be dealt with.  Unless bullies are stopped, they tend to get worse and worse, not better.  If this is happening at school, most schools have someone you can go to so that some adult will know about what's happening and can begin to stop it - a guidnace counselor, a teacher youtrust, the principal, someone.  Can your friend go to his parents and tell them?  If the bully has actually attacked your friend, go to the police.  The bully can be charged.  This is not a laughing matter.  No matter what the bully has said about not telling anyone, TELL.  Here are some well researched tips on dealing with bullying:\n1.  If you are bullied, TELL.  Telling is not being weak or being a coward or tattling.  It is helping to protect everyhone from that bully.\n2.  Tell someone you trust - teacher, counselor, parent, some other adult.  You CANNOT handle this yourself. \n3.  Do not retaliate or get angry.  This could make things worse.\n4.  Respond evenly and firmly or say nothing and walk away.\n5.  develop good strong friendships and support each other.  Bullies tend to pick on kids that they think don't have many friends or kids thye think others won't hlep.\n6.  Act confident.\n7.  Try to stay away from places the bully will be if that is possible.  For example, take a different route to school.\n8.  Avoid unsupervised areas of the school.\n9.  Try not to bring expensive items to school that might attract the bully's attention and that he might try to take or break.\n10.  To gain confidence and feel stronger and feel that youcan take care of yourself, enrol in a self-defnece program if one is available, or a martial arts program or something like that.  Self defence programs teach you some very good skills, very quickly.\n11.  Join a group, such as Scouts, a cadet program, or something like that, so that you have a special group of friends.  \n\nGo to the website www.bullying.co.uk/ which has lots of information for parents and for kids about bullying and about some things you can do.  I think this website might really help you figure out some good positivbe things you can do to deal with this.\n\nI hope this helps you.  Good luck with sorting this out.  Don't give up.  There is help out there. Take care.
556394
Today kids seem angrier and more hostile.  There's also a pack mentality.  When I was in school, if you got in a fight, once the other person went down, you quit.  Now kids keep kicking and stomping and then more kids will pile on.  It's terrible.  It's like they've lost their ability to control their selves.
288247
Very carefully.  I had a child that was bullied and picked on at school.  I discussed the situation with my child at length, and together we decided not to go to the authorities as it would make the situation worse.  However, when the bullying became physically damaging (he came home with visible injuries), I went to the school and had a conference with the administrators, and the teacher of the class in which the abuse took place.  Their reaction was that it was up to my son to handle it.  However, when I threatened to get a lawyer and file harrassment charges . . . they changed their attitude.  The situation was defused . . . and there were never any problems.  I suggest talking to your child if it is a minor abuse and teach them coping skills . . . and if it becomes major, go to the school or facility.
1057309
Bullies are expert at doing their bullying without being seen.  They will find ways around the security cameras.\n\nWe need to establish credibility with our children so that they will trust us and report bullying to us.  \n\nI was never a victim of a school bus bully but, as a school administrator received reports of the incidents.  The bully lost his busing privileges.  (It didn't work to have him sit up front next to the driver because the driver had other things to do - namely driving the bus.)\n\nWe made sure the parents of the victims were filled in and we  instituted a program at the grade level to teach students how not to be victims and to ensure that the teachers were watchful for other bullying behaviours. We had to continue the program the entire time the bully was in the school.
609935
Television can be a powerful influence in developing value systems and shaping behavior. Unfortunately, much of today's television programming is violent. \nExtensive viewing of television violence by children causes greater aggressiveness. Sometimes, watching a single violent program can increase aggressiveness. Children who view shows in which violence is very realistic, frequently repeated or unpunished, are more likely to imitate what they see. Children with emotional, behavioral, learning or impulse control problems may be more easily influenced by TV violence. The impact of TV violence may be immediately evident in the child's behavior or may surface years later, and young people can even be affected when the family atmosphere shows no tendency toward violence.
988917
This is a much more difficult question than the posters are making it out to be.  Sure, it sounds logical to just go to the teacher, the other kids parents, the principal, etc., but the answer is not always this easy.\n\nYou have to realize, if you do this, you are putting your child at a greater risk for continued harassment, additional harassment and possibly even physical retaliation, which is much more likely than parents would like to believe.  The worst thing in the world, especially for a boy, is to be labelled a "nark."  His life will go from bad to worse.  Kids will tease him about it; His classmates won't trust him; Kids will be unwilling to get close to him, etc.  \n\nIt is possible that school officials could just keep a closer eye on it and bust the bully without the bully ever knowing that he had been "ratted" out.  That would be the best case scenario.  \n\nIf you call the bully's parents, 1 of 4 things can happen and 3 of them are not good and the good one is highly unlikely.  You have to realize that, just like you, the bully's parents first reaction is to stick up for their child.\n\n#1 The bully's parents could laugh you off\n#2 The bully's parents could get real defensive and turn against you and your child\n#3 The bully's parents could side with you, tell their kid about the conversation and then the bully would punish your child for your actions\n#4 The bully could get in so much trouble that he straightens out and doesnt tell anyone about it (how likely do you think that is?)\n\nThe worst thing you can do is encourage your child to beat up the bully.  Violence is never the answer.  How effective and realistic is comebacks, avoidance, etc.?  I guess it depends on the situation.  I don't know that it will work though.\n\nWhere is the bullying taking place?  What is the relationship between the kid and the bully?  What does the kid say is happening?  Does the kid give you details?  Details are very important, because there could be a logical solution to the issue.\n\nFinally, the advice you are looking for...older children...say 7th grade and up, (my experience is with the fellas so I come from that angle), are striving to be viewed as adults.  The guys want to take on a mans role; Do the right thing; Help people; PROTECT PEOPLE.  (I realize not all 7th and up guys are like this, but you can use your judgement to find the good ones)  Get a fella that is a little older that you have some sort of relationship with, whether it be a coaches kid, family friend, etc.  Tell him that your son is having an issue and it would be a real help if you could, "look after him, show him the ropes, help him along with the fellas, make sure he gets along alright."  Hopefully, the younger kid looks up to this dude (younger guys usually do, pretty much, no matter what), tell the older kid, "my son really looks up to you.  It would mean alot to him, but (and this is very important) it would mean just as much to me.  You are a good kid.  You are a good role model for him."  This way you are empowering a young man. He will take ownership in the situation.  He will watch out for your kid, and the bully will want nothing to do with an older kid, matter of fact, he will probably think he is down right cool and want to be his friend instead of foe.
331938
If you're being bullied, you need to talk to your parents or teachers and get it stopped. You shouldn't have to go through that.
231703
YES!  I think it would especially help children from dysfunctional homes because they may learn ways to cope with their hardships and with their feelings.  A lot of children are afraid to feel and don't know that it's OK.  This could help children and adolescences cope more constructively rather than the acting out via eating disorders, violence, suicide, etc.  Ideally the home shoud nourish the heart and soul of a child and the school's job is to feed the mind.  But unfortunately many homes are not capable of giving the necessary love (and even worse, may be abusive) so the children need to learn coping skills to deal with their respective situations.  I could write on an on about this topic...  great question to bring up!
866231
Yes, I have been bullied off and on through my years of schooling. It makes me feel realy bad when someone talks bad about me. Especially when it's someone that you're related to or good friends with. I never bully anyone because I know how it feels to be bullied.