How to overcome the feeling of being used for 2 1/2 years in a relation ship that went bad?
456685
Look at your part and see if that helps.
625902
There is no doubt that your previous experience with abuse had made you vulnerable from inside. But it doesn’t mean that you will be this way forever. \nThe moment you feel that you desire the person you will overcome your fear (not shyness).\nAll you need is to practice a positive attitude, and if your partner is open minded he shall give you time and treat you gently, no rush. Only do it when you are ready.\nRemember that the person who abused you is not the one who is actually with you right now, so don’t mix your fear between your current relationship and your previous experience.
546744
You must feel pretty much at rock bottom - and I am sorry to hear that.  But, from rock bottom, there is only one way to go - UP.  Every day you cope with this will be one day nearer to getting over this, one more step in an upwards direction.  I try to learn something from every bad experience I have, because experience is what you get in life when you don't get what you want from life.  In the future whatever happens, you will know you can cope, because you will have coped with this.  Talk to your parents, they will be concerned for you and want to help.  Even though they have split up, they still both want the best for you, and hopefully can put aside their differences and be able to work together with you so that you all come through this.   Time heals - I bet you find it hard to remember what worried you 6 months ago, 1 year ago, 2 years ago, so although this is a major crisis in your life, you will come through it I am sure. I hope this helps.
153465
Even though I'm a guy, I have been where you are before.  My ex always dangled that possibility that we might get together thing out there.  Unfortunately being the person who got left you feel like if there is a posiblity then you should keep your life on hold just in case.  Two years is too long to have to keep your life on hold for someone who has left you and cheated on you.  It is past time for you to get your life back and to seek out happiness once again.  Step one though should be filing for divorce.  I recomend this before you date anyone because in some states it can make a difference in the settlement still.  If you so much as date someone even though he is the one who cheated first and left they will still see you as equally cheating even though you waited two years.  Beyond that concern though you have every right and duty to yourself to move on and be happy.  Get divorced and find a guy who really loves you and deserves your love.
44188
i really feel you, i just experienced the same ordeal.she didnt go to another country, but she was only 2 hours away.i can tell you that alot of times long distant relations dont work, or at least they havent worked for me.
3293
start talking even if it is VERY broken.\nI came through that successfully.\n\nof course, you need somebody who will listen in the very beginning stage and will enjoy listening.\n\nhave fun.
458589
Hello again Fantasy Foo, I've been were your at, and it's not a good feeling. One good thing about life is....Time heals everything. I was once told: If you love something let it go, if it comes back it's yours...if it don't it never was. If you have the fellas number or you know how to get in contact with him...let him know how you feel, but don't hate on his girl...thats tacky.
77616
Break this separation!\nHave a brave, and ask some nice girls.\nBecause its separation, girls are also feel alone as you feel.
775283
It's natural to feel this way and with time you'll feel less and less of this compitetion.\n\nOnce you move on you'll forget all about it.\n\nGood luck!
564651
I remember how I felt when I left my sweetheart.  I was only able to see her once a weekend.  She lived like 20 miles from where I lived and I had to take the bus every Saturday to see her.  Man, what great times.  But at day's end, my heart hurt something fierce.  Don't feel embarrassed.  You may be afraid to lose this great feeling you have.  You don't ever want it to go away.  This is your insecurities talking.  You need to know that you are everything he wants.  Gain confidence in you and your relationship.  You possess the power.
163308
I don't think it is possible to not feel bad about ending a 2yr relationship...but both of you will be all the better for it..you'll see.
535012
Well, of course your going to feel this way. Having someone take advantage of your good nature would naturally scorn anyone's soul and heart. How long has it been since the divorce? Your just going to have to have time to heal. I would suggest though going out to put your mind at ease, but don't rush into another relationship quite fast.  Trust is something your going to just have to build with women again. Look back at your ex-wife were there signs that she was out for just money? If so use those signs to your advantage and beware of such signs in future relationships. DON'T EVER TELL SOMEONE YOUR DATING THAT SHE WAS A GOLD DIGGER. This may lead them to believe you could easily manipulated and taken advantaged of regardless of how long the marriage was. Simply say it was mutual and you rather not discuss it. Besides it's no body's business regardless of whom your dating or not. If there were no signs then be even more aware don't be to harsh w/ us women NOT all of us are out for money. I will pray for you strength to get back on your feet. You pray for a good Christian woman to come into your life and to be able to learn to trust again. Good Luck & God Bless. When you decide to become involved with someone again don't continue to be on the defensive either. You choose to date the woman so give her a chance, but just be aware of signs. Trust her, until you have proven it to be other wise or it's broke.  Don't allow your insecurity from a previous relationship or your ex-wife to ruin your chance for happiness.
251351
I deal with this daily.\n\nYou move on until you find someone who makes you feel the way "the one that got away" did. There could be any number of reasons that the first one got away, but the fact is that she did, and has likely moved on with her life - you should, too.
571936
we are going through same situation.  my boyfriend is scheduled to ride a ship this next week and be a seafarer.  we won't see each other for about nine months.  the worst thing is there are a lot of temptations in a seafarer's life.  I know that's why it's really hard for me to take the reality everyday.  I have no choice.  All we can do is to trust the guy we love and believe them with what they are saying.  We have no choice anyway.  Just think possitively and remember that it's part of God's plan.  And whatever they will do, whether they remain faithful or not, it's their choice.  They must just be ready for the thing called "karma".
995727
I REALLY suggest you see a counsellor. And do some 'self expression' and 'cognitive thinking', when your counsellor is with you, for safety.\n\nAND: **Life is full of ups and downs. And hey pad yourself, you 'have hand' some rough years, that mean you pass them, you made it thru. Also, it's 'have had', it's pass tense, it's history, so tell youself, it's 2006 June 22.**\n\nI understands how you feel, because some here. I been thru more than 10 years of rough time. Even now I still have to practice telling myself ** **.
595628
I totally relate to what you are going through. I did this too. I worked with and lived with my ex-fiancee. Leaving was one of the hardest things to do, but it really was the best thing and my life is so much better now. When you are done with that relationship the only way to leave is to leave it all. You should start looking for a new job now. If you feel like that company depends on you, then hire and train someone to replace you. Unfortunatly (for your feelings) you are replaceable and the business will go on without you. You aren't screwing them by moving on. You deserve more than what you are getting. Start looking for a new job, give your ex-boyfriend/boss 2 weeks notice and start focusing on yourself. \nYou are allowed to have feelings for him, he was in your life for a significant amount of time, your feelings are valid. But right now, you need to put yourself first. Have faith in yourself, trust yourself. You have to let go of what you have to get something better.\nI would love to talk to you, listen to you and offer you support.\nGood luck
624591
I really believe that just when you think things cannot get any worse, they get a whole lot better. Two months is a young relationship. Love is a strong word. I'm not undermining your feelings, but if it is true love, it'll be there even after the worst of things. So, if you don't get the same feelings back from her, ask yourself, do you like to feel bad?