What is the best lame pick up line you've ever heard?
462301
If I told you that you have a hot body, will you hold it against me?
1058534
The worst breakup line of all time is the whole "It's not you, it's me" lie.\n\nThe worst pick up line I've ever heard is from a guy that already had a girlfriend:  "What do you consider cheating?"
584634
Excuse me,but can you help me,there's someone i like and i don't know whtt to say to her--what's good pick up line (i know it's silly,)but help me ,what's the best pick up line  you think a guy could use-i mean really -I really like this girl-alot-do you know any ? you must of had some said to you? some silly once i'm sure-- i don't want to look like a jerk-i like her--help me -what should i say--what kind of line would work on you? " she tells -- you say thanks- take it -turn -take a step stop -turn back-use it!\n\nthey laugh anyway
78354
I have alot!!\n\nThis guy was painting a tall buliding next to a church. He droped the brush, said "son of a b***h", climbed down the ladder, got the brush, then climbed back up and continued painting. This happened a few more times and everytime he said "son of a b***h". Finally the preacher came out and said "next time you drop the brush say praise the lord". So he dropped the brush, said "praise the lord", the brush floated back up to him and the preacher said 'son of a b***h"\n\n\nWhy is halloween Micheal Jackson's favorite holiday?\nFree Delivery\n\n\nA Cowboy walking into a bar and ordered a coke. He took a drink and said "this tastes funny". So the bartender got him a new one. And he said "thats better" then the bartender said\n"Me Indian, Me play joke, Me go pee-pee in your coke"\nThen the cowboy said "Me cowboy, Me run fast, Me shoot bullet up your A$$"\n\nThis next one I heard on a stand-up comedy show...\n"Drinking and Driving is fun. But getting in a wreak isn't. I was with my friends driving and we hit something. I don't know what it was, but when I woke up I was in a tree, the car was upside down in a ditch and there was a cop there"\n\nCop-Who was driving?\nMan-It wasn't me cause that's not my parking, I park on the tires.\n\nCop-I am trying to figure out who was driving.\nMan-I'm trying to figure out how I got in this tree.\n\nCop-Have you been drinking and driving.\nMan-No, I was f***ed up before I got in the car.\n\nCop-The way you are acting I think I need to give you a drug test.'\nMan- Go ahead, ask me anything. I have been doing drugs for years.\nCop-Do you have a drug problem?\nMan-No, I have planty of weed at home.\n\n\nThis one is fun to do to your friends...lol\nPerson 1- Did you blow bubbles as a kid?\nPerson 2-Yes\nPerson 1-Well, he's back in town and wants you number.\nBoth- lol lmao
431111
lol  same ol' lame-o has worked for me for YEARS:\n\n.....Do I know you from somewhere?  You look REALLY familiar...  What's your name?  I'm Whoeveryouare.  What do you do?  blah blah blah  Did you ever work over at blah blah blah? \n\nThen you've got a whole conversation going.  Just don't do it to the three guys sitting right in a row at the bar.  :-)
383865
A blonde and a guy were out on a date and they ended up at ''Lovers' Cove'' where they were making out. The guy thought that things were going pretty good and maybe he would get lucky tonight, so he thought that he would ask her if she wanted to go in the back seat. \n''NO!'' yelled the blonde. \n\nThe guy just figured that she wasn't ready yet. Things got pretty hot and the guy thought he would try again. \n\n''NO!'' the blonde yelled again. \n\nThings got even hotter and the blond was down to her bra and the guy even had her pants unzipped. \n\n''Do you wanna go in the back seat yet?'' asked the guy. \n\n''For the last time, NO!'' said the blonde. Frustrated, the guy asked, ''Well, why the hell not?'' \n\nThe blonde looked at him and said, ''Because I wanna stay up here with you.''
974730
Hummm...sounds kinda creepy to me...never heard of it as a pick up line, but I guess it could be...ouch..
803902
One of my personal favorites is from "Zoolander":\n"You can derelict my balls, capi-tan." LOL!!!\n\n*Edit*\nOh, I just thought of another funny one from "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective":\nLois: "How would you like it if I made your life a living hell?"\nAce: "Well, Lois, I'm not quite ready for a relationship right now, but maybe I'll give you a call sometime. Your number still 911?" LOL!!!\nPs. Thanks for the great question. You should get some funny answers.
729079
liked that one, more please!\n\n\nThere was this lady and she really wanted to have sex, but she was to scared to ask her husband so she went to a jipsy and told her her problem. \n\nThe jipsy rummaged around in a chest and pulled out a pickle jar with a penis in it, and said "All you have to do is open the jar and say 'Pickle penis my vigina' and it will start having sex with you". \n\nSo later she tries out the pickle penis and it works great. That is until her husband walks in and he shouts "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT" and the woman says "It's a pickled penis" \n\nUnfortunately her husband replied "PICKLE PENIS MY ASS"
162013
TOP TEN REJECTION LINES GIVEN BY WOMEN (AND WHAT THEY REALLY MEAN)Use the one that is most appropriate.\n10. I think of you as a brother... (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance.")\n9. There's a slight difference in our ages... (I don't want to do my dad)\n8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way... (You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes on.)\n7. My life is too complicated right now... (I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other guys I'm seeing.)\n6. I've got a boyfriend... (I prefer my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's)..\n5. I don't date men where I work... (I wouldn't date you if you were in the same 'solar system', much less the same building.)\n4. It's not you, it's me... (It's you.)\n3. I'm concentrating on my career... (Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better than dating you.)\n2. I'm celibate... (I've sworn off only the men like you.)\nand the number 1 rejection line given by women (and what it really means)\n\n1. Let's be friends... (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with.)
297400
the dumber the better, i once used "i'd swim through a mile of whale come to sleep with you tonite"\nanother great one; walk up to a strange woman place your finger on her lips and say "don't say a word, that way we won't f uck this great relationship up" and then take her out the door and back to your place
874857
This had me crying when I first heard it...\n\nAn old man is riding in a lift with two glamorous women. One woman takes a perfume bottle out of her bag and sprays her neck. She turns to the other woman and says, "Romance by Ralph Lauren...£150 an ounce."\n\nThe other woman takes a perfume bottle out of her bag, sprays herself, and says, "Chanel No.5...£200 an ounce"\nThe lift stops and the doors open. \n\nThe old man steps out and lets off a huge rumbling fart. As the doors close he looks back at them and ays..."Broccoli, 49p a pound."
791648
Ooh ooh! Pick me! Pick me!\n\nI never get picked...\n\n(To the over-sensitive, it's a joke)
313853
worst: did you just fart, because you blow me away.\nbest: Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
466409
Number 5\n\n"I may not be the best-looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you."\nBelieve it or not, only good-looking guys should use this one, since they'll be viewed as modest. If a guy uses this and he is ugly, then it's a sign of insecurity, which is a huge a turnoff. Generally, this line passes because it proves that the guy is down-to-earth. It will surely throw her off guard as she might get offended. Use with caution. \n\nNumber 4\n\n"You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy."\nIf you ever spot an attractive woman and would like to approach her, this line is funny in a childish manner and women tend to laugh off funny lyrics such as this one. \n\nNumber 3 \n\n"What's your name?"\nInstead of saying something like, "baby, we're like two banks: we both have interest in each other and we should merge," this one is simple and will not insult her intelligence. It may be the oldest one in the book (well, "come here often?" takes that award), but this one is genuine and direct -- two important qualities. \n\nNumber 2 \n\n"See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute."\nExtremely original, this line will make you stand out from the pack. This line virtually guarantees that she will smile. You may not leave with her that night, but you may get her phone number or at least chat it up for a while. \n\nNumber 1 \n\n"So what haven't you been told tonight?"\nVery original, this line will make you stand out from the other men. You acknowledge that she has been getting hit on all night and you do not wish to add to her frustration. However, you are confident
719788
For some Super Duper lame jokes -http://www.hevanet.com/benh/jokes.html\nhttp://www.cartalk.com/content/timekill/lamejokes/\n\nand for funny ones -\nhttp://www.coolquiz.com/humor/jokes/
184087
JUST BE YOURSELF...CALMLY WALK UP TO THEM...DON'T BE FAKE AND DON'T TRY TO USE "PICK UP LINES" YOU CAN USE PICK UP LINES THAT ARE CLASSY BUT NOT TRASHY! SAY SOMETHING LIKE, "HEY, (INTRODUCE YOURSELF), AND BE HONEST...TELL HER THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO DANCE WITH HER, OR BUY HER A DRINK OR JUST STRIKE UP A CONVERSATION ABOUT THE SONG PLAYING! A GIRL LIKES IT WHEN A MAN CARRIES HIMSELF WELL, SELF CONFIDENCE IS KEY! IF YOU ACT LIKE YOU HAVE SELF CONFIDENCE AND YOU ARE REALLY TELLING YOURSELF YEAH RIGHT THIS GIRL ISNT GONNA GIVE ME THE TIME OF DAY...SHE WILL PICK UP ON THE FAKE AND THE REAL...SO PLAY IT COOL! BE YOURSELF! AND HEY IF SHE DOES REJECT...IT'S OKAY...