i and my husband aren't talking as of now because of some stupid thing that went on last night should we talk.
459590
My dear.. The first thing to do is talk to him about how you feel when you are both relaxed and the problem is behind. Don't confront him immediately after what happened. You have to also assess how much you love him and how much he loves you. If you think the love is still there, then give it a chance and talk about what you like and what he likes and come to a compromize. However, if you feel that the love part is missing, then don't waste both of your times and put an end, it will only increase your agony. Unless, there are kids involved, this means a whole new strategy that you should consider them. If no kids, and no love, then separation is the best.
1023064
You need to talk to him. The best way to do this is to go out to a quiet restaurant for dinner together one evening. Stay positive but get your point across to him about how you feel. You also need to ask him what has happened, at least in his opinion. Also, talk about the good times the two of you have had together. STAY POSITIVE! This will help both of you. This could be the start the two of you need to open up the talking again. The more the two of you can talk and stay positive, the better the chance you have of saving your marriage! I can tell that you still love and care for him, I wish you luck!
930164
looks like you know whats going on. the question is, what are you going to do about it? your husband is playin you, and you need to confront him, dont let him feed you those obvious lies. he should respect you and his unborn child enough to at least be honest with you. if he doesnt want to be with you, he needs to make that known.
730161
I think you are both in the wrong here. He was a jerk, and you overreacted. While you do have every right to be upset here, I don't think this is as big of an issue as you are making it out to be. \n\nSit down and have yet another talk with him. Do not let your temper get the better of you. Calmly explain that you feel that what he did was an intimate act, reserved for couples. Not something to be done for a casual friend, especially since you sat there watching the whole thing. Remind him that he even admitted he wouldn't want a guy doing the same for you. After you've said how you feel, then apologize for loosing your temper like that. You wanted to express your feelings, and things got out of control.\nIf he can't see your point of view, and apologize in return, then maybe it's time he spent a few nights on the couch while you take the bed.
219239
would you get over it if your husband left you for some tramp? I don't think so its not that easy. Give Jen a break. Stuff like that takes time.
236182
This really has been a wonderful evening,we will have to do this again sometime but right now i need to get some rest and ill bet you have a busy day tomorrow as well,lets call it a night.   If they argue with that ,find some new friends.Good Luck!
363554
i don't fight with my husband, i argue! lol. And he doesn't. grrrr. He's too agreeable. it's frustrating. When i argue with him, he waits till i cool down and sits me down to talk to me about my feelings. I have never gone to bed angry since we moved in together, (almost 3 years). So i think that you should not argue and wait till you're calm, then talk like you would if you were proposing an idea to your boss. (have points ready that you want to discuss, and stick to those) but just talk about your feelings, and what the other person could do to help the situation. (and maybe what you could do too!)
417317
Don't push him but you can ask if he would tell you. If he says he doesn't want to talk about it, just say that you would really like to know what happened and if he ever feels comfortable telling you, you would like to know.
1072105
i think we have the same problem. i'm sorry it happened that way but im sure trying to work things out is easiest by talking things over and doing wat is best for BOTH of you.\nGOOD LUCK!
447946
I just answered your other question and I felt the need to answer this one too! Girl you are in a very emotional state right now, you need to cut all ties to this other man, this is why you are being so hard on yourself! You need to FOCUS! Stick to the topic at hand and that is that of your marriage! You need to start talking more to your husband and let him know you feel no emotional support from him and let him know how you are feeling (if you haven't already)!\n\nThere are alot of people that both of you have involved involuntarily, they did not ask to be in the situation, you need to be the adult here and finish what you started right? Do what YOU KNOW is right not what every one tells you too! I hope you do get some answers here that will help in your decision making, but ultimately the decision is yours to make. Good Luck to you!
713575
If it's a one time thing..."Not tonight boo.  I'm not in the mood, but I will make it up to you."  If it's something you're not feeling anymore at all, the two of you would need to have a long talk together or you would have to try to take the sex out of that relationship.
950078
You should have a discussion with your husband about the importance of communication.  Yes, you are still here because you love him.  He has to understand your hurt and disappointment.  You both need to agree to learn how to resolve your problems by communicating better and putting your marriage first above all else.\n\nYou said that you have been going through a rough time and  you were being stupid.  He was afraid of losing you.  If you feel like you've come a long way in your relationship, and the issues that caused the rough patch have been resolved, then let it go.  Don't throw it up in his face when something goes wrong, stick to the issue at hand.  If you don't think you can trust him, tell him so.  BUT I would encourage you both to get counseling; it will serve as a tool for you to move beyond what's happening now.  You don't want to get bogged down in resentment.\n\nIn his way, he recognized his mistake.  He distanced himself from everything associated with that situation.  He deserves a lot of credit for that.\n\nGood luck!
1015895
We did not want to hear that either. Thanx for totally ruining the rest of my night. Next time please keep things like that to yourself.
1127693
Ok, I think I understand your question.\n\nThat is not cool for you husband to joke around like that. ~ Not during your most intimate and private moments together.  It is possible, if that is the kind of sense of humor there is in your relationship, that he was innocently joking.  But, I sense that you don't feel that way and are confused and rather offended that he makes any such comments.  The humor in a joke often stems from the truth of it...  You really need to sit down and talk with your husband and lay out some quidelines and expectations for your marriage.  What I would do, is tell your manboy husband that this kind of "joking" is hurtful or bothersome to you and you would rather he did not talk like that.  You may want to look into some counseling in order to get an outside perspective and some support.  Be sure and give your husband all of the things you would want yourself in the relationship, such as Trust, Compassion, Respect, Honesty and of Course good ol' fashioned L O V E.
38355
a quick infusion of alcohol should work for the night then tommorow go start you a new family,\nand things should turn out better, glad i could help.
688115
Take a break. You've been betrayed. \nGo away for a little while, maybe, but this one is going to take some time, if ever.\nStop imagining that she was having sex like she does with you.\nDon't do that to yourself, because I guarantee it wasn't. Only the two of you have sex like the two of you.\nCan you handle the answer if you ask her to give you a blow- by-blow description of the night? A sort of "putting yourself in her shoes" for the night?\nIt's risky, but if you can listen, It just may benefit you so you can be angry, and then move on either way.\nShe should be ashamed of herself, and getting angry at her once and blasting her does not relieve her of the tremendous weight she's put on you.\nYou may never be able to trust her again. That sucks for you, because you had no part in it, and want things the way they were.\nWas there a problem that wasn't being addressed before this night?\nDoes anyone have their head buried in the sand??\nYou may need to take this time to get right into each others brains and decided what each of you REALLY wants out of life.\nPlease don't make the same mistake she did. You'll hate yourself.\nI can say that it is not the worst thing that can happen, but it is way up there.\nShe betrayed you, plain and simple. maybe she should live without you for a while and the two of you can really see where you're at. get yourself some legal assistance so you don't lose touch with your child.
1183684
What you've suggested is really all you can do. You gave her good advice about communicating with her husband and going to counseling. Beyond that, it's really none of your business and not your responsibility.