What is the most corniest line you ever heard on a comedy?
466972
Any line from Zoolander.  Man, I never get tired of that movie.  \n-"They were like brothers to me, not like real brothers, but brothers in the way black people say it." \n-"After a while, I became bulimic."  "You could read minds?"\n-"Well I guess I'd have to answer your question with another question. How many Abodiginals do you see modeling?"\n-"If there's anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us, it's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiselled abs and stunning features, it doesn't mean that we, too, can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident."\n\nI could go on and on....
910010
I Started a Joke, by the BeeGees and performed most recently by the Wallflowers on the Zoolander soundtrack.\n\n\nI started a joke, which started the whole world crying, \nbut I didn't see that the joke was on me, oh no. \n\nI started to cry, which started the whole world laughing, \noh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me. \n\nI looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes, \nand I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I'd said. \n\nTil I finally died, which started the whole world living, \noh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me.
124764
ooh! I almost missed this one =)\n\nOnce upon a time in Disneyland there was a Victoria's Secret model named Oscar Wilde. All night and all day her third cousin twice removed forced her to scrub the toilet. Then one day, she received a visit from the little old lady who lived it a shoe. The old lady says, "Hi! I am Papa Smurf and I am here to pump... you up. \nLost in an unbearable lightness of being, Oscar says to P. Smurf "how many licks *does* it take?", to which Papa replies, "They are the eggmen. I am the walrus. Goo goo g' joob!" \n\nSo then Oscar and Papa find a field of magic mushrooms and live happily ever after...or did they?
1121144
that ... WAS THE FUNNIEST JOKE I EVER READ!
340301
lol man there are so many ummm ok here's my list\n\n“I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman!”\n\n“You tried your best and failed miserably. The lesson is: never try.”\n\n“Alright brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.”\n\n“'To Start Press Any Key'. Where's the ANY key?”\n\n“Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.”\n\n“Marge, it's 3 AM. Shouldn't you be baking?”\n\n"America's health care system is second only to Japan ... Canada, Sweden, Great Britain ... well, all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky stars we don't live in Paraguay!"\n\n"Aw, Dad, you've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man, and old people are useless."\n\n"I saw this movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over fifty, and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode! I think it was called, the Bus That couldn't Slow Down."\n\n"No, no, no, Lisa. If adults don't like their jobs, they don't go on strike. They just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American Way."\n\nlol ok im finished
1001129
I know this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guy, who knows this guys cousin.........\n\nLMAO I couldn't stop laughing.\n\nAnd when Spongebob made that bubble in the shape of an elephant and Patrick bursts out laughing and says "It's a Giraffe!"
844715
gork laugh so hard he fall off rock..gorks joke now\ngork got mad cow disease from happy meal.\nhahahahah...snort...hahahah
697589
lol thats freggin hilarious!!!!!!!!!! lol i freggin loved it the best one ive ever heard!!!!!lol
863676
who's line.... that show cracks me up!
846086
"It's Merely a flesh wound!"   CLASSIC\n\nI use "I shall taunt you a second time (in french accent)"  All the time...it cracks me up!!!
1036139
i just received this joke from a text message..\n\nthere is this boyfriend and girlfriend..\nbf: "hon, let's do 69!"\ngf: "what is 69?"\nbf: "it's easy.."\n\nthen they positioned theirselves..\nwhile in that position, the boy farted 4 times..\n\nthen the girl reacted and said "omg! i cant do this anymore! i cant take anymore the remaining 65!"\n\nlolz..
653613
A man met a beautiful woman and he decided he wanted to marry her \nright away. She said, "But we don't know anything about each other." \n\nHe said, "That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along." .....\n\nWhoops.\n\n\n\nOk, here is my real joke, the only other one I can remember in my flu delirium.\n\n...as told to me by my best friend when she was eight and I was ten...\n\nIf you are on the potty and you are not American, what are you?\n\nyou're-a-peein'.....
836768
OMG  this is one of the funniest ones ive heard.  ROFL  Im gonna have to use this one :)
766766
No... that was from his stand up show titled "For What It's Worth"..... very funny stuff......
810218
Dave Chappelle, Chris Rock and Richard Pryor.\n\nToo many funny quotes to mention.
657916
"any jokes"\nthere.. i just said it \nhahhaha ! i know it;s lame !\nsorry !
510102
"Stupid TV, be more funny!!"\n\nthat would be Homer J.