Married Life in the US Army?
464021
I am currently a military spouse and if I could do it all over again I would have told my husband to just get a job in his major and not the Army.  The Army takes care of us, they have some great benefits probably the best in the world.  But none of that is worth risking your life for.  I'm not anti-Army, I'm just living the life supporting my husband.  We have a 3 year old, and he just came back from a deployment in Dec and possibly will be leaving again within a month.  Imagine a 3-year old asking for his daddy everyday while he is fighting in a senseless "war".  If you can't, it's pure hell.  I don't recommend military life to anyone unless you are single and times are REALLY hard for you financially.  There are alot of sacrifices you have to make in a military environment.  I have some research for you, go and find out the divorce rate for military servicemen, its beyond the means of high.  I think I just told you the reason why!!
436821
Doesn't want you too or is emphatically set against it? As an Army spouse, I can tell you that acceptance of the military lifestyle is hard enough when it is something that you chose. To have it put on you, even if your relationship lasts in the short term, in the long term there will be some serious resentment. \n\nThis should be a team decision. Before my husband elected for an indefinite term of service on his last reenlistment, we both sat down and made a list of the positives and negatives. We weighed them against each other and came to the decision together. \n\nWhile you're discussing it, there are people available to tell about the military lifestyle at www.goarmy.com
853239
My hubby just got home in September!!! If you don't live on base and have military wives as friends, I suggest joining a Yahoo group for military wives... it's good to talk to others who've been there.. and are there for that matter!!!
466150
I know what you mean.  My husband is a soldier in the Army.  We spend a lot of time apart with him in very dangerous situations. It would be really easy to get down, or be negative.  I just keep in mind that my husband is a great and brave man fighting for those too weak to fight for themselves.  What keeps me going is the pride I feel for him, and the wonderful moments come everyday when you treasure each other the way we do.\n\nGet Blessed!
511804
If you two are legally married, then if your husband is deployed to any other base, you will both be going together. The military does not force the spouse to leave the other spouse. Only if you are married however. If he is deployed to war...that is a different story. Depending on his job in the military as well. \n\nIf you need anything, feel free to IM.
282810
My hubby's in the army and it just depends...sometimes you live where you signed  up at...but at some point the army makes you go over seas for at least two years, we lived in Germany...you basically live all over never know where your gonna go next with the army..hope this helped some..
450942
If there is love and trust yes you guys can make it my brother in law was in the marines and it was hard for his girlfriend at first but they are now married and the 2 years went by fast for them.
1086580
Well, OF COURSE there is hope.  There is also a huge amount of work and effort ahead of the two of you.  Did you move to Germany with the military by any chance ?  \n\nIn any case, he is working and you are in a foreign country which - unless you ARE on a military base  - pretty much precludes you from working too.,  (If you are on a base, go to the Civilian Personnel Office and sign up for the spouse sprefernce jobs.)  Now you need to find some things to fill your time while he works.  That would serve two pruposes: 1) you would be more fulfilled in your own right and 2) there would be less pressure on him to "be" the whole of your life.  Right now it seems, with what little information you have provided, that you are relying on him to make you happy because you have nothing else to take up your time - he, on the other hand, is working and cannot be everything to you.\n\n(By the way, no husband should have to be "everything" to his wife, nor should any wife have to be everything to the husband.  You need to have a life of your own - something that interests you and expands you as a person - something that you bring to the marriage to improve the relationship yo have there.)\n\nIf you are a military spouse - and you can see that I strongly suspect that you are - then you are going to have to get used to the absences.  Check in with the Enlisted Spouses Club and find some other spouses like yourself - some who have been in the service for awhile and get the lowdown from them.  The military is a different life than a civilian one back in the states.\n\nEven without a job, there are many things you can do in Germany!  Oh, you lucky dukling, you!   There is SO MUCH to see over there - it is a beautiful country.  Look into the MWR activities - there should be some inexpensive day trips that are being arranged. Go see things so that you have things to share wiht him.  Make sure the house is kept up - because you are, after all, the housewife at this time.  (Also because the military expects it and it is HE who will be dinged if it is not done.)  That way, when you two DO have time together, it can be relaxing and not filled with "Honey Do" lists.\n\nOnce you build your life there in a way to keep youself busy, and release the pressure on him to take care of your entertainment and social needs, then you can begin to talk to him about spending the time he does have available for you in a quality way.\n\nGood luck!
93550
When he first gets out of boot camp he will go to a school to train him in his mos...you will not be able to go there, but when that is finished and he gets an actual duty station and you were married you would be able to go with him. If you are looking at marrying into the Marine Corps family check out LINKS (Lifestyle Insights, Networking, Knowledge and Skills (L.I.N.K.S.) \nThe Spouse's LINK to the Corps!)
887153
Trust me, he wont be fooling around during basic training. They do a good job at keeping the guys and girls seperate. Plus, there's no time. I married my husband right before I left for basic. (he's a civilian). I was soooo worried he'd cheat on me while I was gone. And he was so worried I would cheat on him while I was in training. \n\nYou have nothing to worry about. Now, as far as tech school. He moved to Texas to be there while I was in tech school. Yes, a lot of people  cheated while there. They are horny ( 6 and 1/2 weeks without sex can do that) plus, thre is more freedom in tech school than basic training. If you can move to where he is having tech school, I would. I'm not saying he'd cheat if you don't. But it was very helpful for us. But it was the WORST time ever for us. Tech school is designed to test your ability to deal with more stupid and pointless tasks to evaluate your ability to deal with stress.\n\nIf you want more info on what it's like for him during basic training I can give you all the details and tell you what his day is like. You can e-mail or IM me. I hope this  helped.\nCongrats on being pregnant
497901
Well its really up to him and how he wants to do this. I hope he isn't doing this just because his soon and maybe to be father in law was in the Coast Guard. The military is just like any other job. You have to enjoy what you are doing. The Army and the Coast guard are two totally different branches of the military, and they are on opposite ends. The pro's would be of course the "title" the benefits healthcare wise, housing, medical benefits, the 20 year plan, (thats the big retirment number). Salary...is Ehhh...once he hits the high E-5's and 6's he'll be making the better money kind of. Cons...boot camp..being deployed to Iraq possibly, Kuwait. He will be away from home a lot...so unless his girl friend and him decide to get married...she will be stuck at home...with the baby of course. And its a lot better if he gets married before he joins up (from experience). And as for you mom...be proud of him in whichever way he chooses. He's a grown boy now...and he has to learn how to make a life of himself and he has to define success through his family and through his career. Whatever he may choose. College, or the military, he is your son. Be proud. If he does join up. Be proud that you are the mother of an American Soldier.
225917
hope this helps some http://usmilitary.about.com/od/enlistedjobs/a/89b.htm
906622
NO -- Orders are orders.  We can request certain duty stations, but when the orders come down, we, the servicemembers, do realize that we serve to meet the needs of the service, and not the other way around.\n\nIF you do marry him, then you need to prepare to go back to court and get YOUR divorce orders and custody orders modified yourself.  That is your responsibility.
486837
The first few days will be the hardest.  My husband and I have been married for a year.  Out of that year, we've spent 6 months together. My husband  was in Missouri for 2 months, we spent 2 weeks together, then he was off to Germany.  Now, I'll get to Germany next month, and he leaves for Iraq in August, for a year.  You'll get used to it after a while.  It's all part of being a military wife.  Don't let yourself think about it too much. Keep busy!  Hang out with friends or do something with your family.  Try to stay occupied at all times.  Trust me, things will be great once he gets back!
1121078
My hubby was deployed for a year and I know how hard it is.  What got me through it was getting a full time job that allowed me to take his phone calls during work hours, and sending alot of email and packages.  Just keep in mind that he will come home safely and make sure you have a good support group at home for you.  If you stay strong and supportive it will help him more than you will ever know.  Even though you aren't married you can also call the FRG (Family Readiness Group) that will be set up.  Also if at all possible try and go to see him off.  It'll be good for you to meet some of the women in the FRG and you might get to know a few you really connect with.  If you want to talk or have any questions feel free to email me and I will try to help.\nAlso, from being a military spouse for 4 years, don't worry about the deployment thing until he actually has the orders.  In the military, alot of rumors are spread around (my husband was originally suppose to go a year before he was actually deployed) so don't worry until he has the orders.  Hope this helps.
997159
Not up on Navy tours, but you need to ask if accompanied is possible at that base. If it is, they could tack 1 extra year onto his tour once he marries. Its best for him to speak to someone like his supervisor and find out the correct people to ask.\nI know with Air Force, if I wanted to accompany my husband and it was allowed, they'd just tack an extra year onto his orders and it wouldn't be a big deal. But it all depends on if they are letting family go with him.
705432
Being a military wife, yes, it's hard when my husband is deployed for long periods but I have gotten used to it.  I have my own job, activities and friends to bide my time with while he is away.  I knew what I was getting into when we got married and I'm sticking with it.