Should I keep forgiving my sister, even though she keeps doing the same crap to people?
459079
We could have the same sister.  Mine is pretty much the same way.\n\nShe gossips about people all the time (then gets mad when people say something about her), has 5 kids but shows preference for one, tells our mother that she (mom) never did anything for her - when our parents have bent over backwards for both of us, everthing has to be about her - when it isn't she changes the subject to be about her, I could go on and on.\n\nMy suggestion to you is to take it all with a grain of salt.  I quit having to much contact with her and when she calls 90% of the time I don't answer (God bless the person that came up with caller-id), and when we do talk she spends much of the time yelling at the kids or trying to tell me that I must repent my sins - leave the Catholic Church and join up with her church because hers is the One True Christian Church that Jesus intended to set up.\n\nNot to sound mean, but I just laugh to myself.  I have heard all of this for far more than 10 years and I quit forgiving.  In order to be forgiven you must not do what you were doing to need forgiveness for.  For her, that hasn't happened.\n\nI suggest that you keep your distance for a while, make some excuse to not be around her.  I know it sounds just as bad as what she is doing, but you must take care of yourself, and it sounds like her actions are causing you some mental distress.\n\nGood luck.
1160494
you used to mess around???! if i am understanding the use of this word correctly then its your fault that she is acting this way... you were leading her on. she is your step sister, and its just as disgusting as if she was your real sister...\n\nyou two need to talk it out for sure. tell her she is beautiful and if you two werent related, it would have been possible to take this somewhere, but since you are related she needs to get over this and forget about the whole thing.
957630
Tell her it is not your fault she was wronged in the past and you should not have to pay for what others did.  Trust me or lose me stand firm!!!!!
10276
I can certainly relate to what you are going through.  I, too, am a giver, and I have felt so drained of everything after being repeatedly used by someone. Yes, it does hurt badly to be liked for only what you have or can give!  I agree that you should be quick to forgive, and not just when it feels right.  However, you can forgive someone but still keep a healthy distance from that person if they continue doing things to hurt you.  Someone who is TRULY sorry won't keep using and abusing you.  I would suggest you try reading the book "Safe People" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. It really deals with this very issue and shows you how to safely choose people who are not going to treat you as a door mat.  In the mean time, go on forgiving, but set up some boundaries for yourself and don't allow people to walk on you.  Choose your friends wisely.  You can still love them, and pray for them, that they will come to see how they have treated you, but you don't want to give them the go-ahead for mistreating you.  If they are truly your friends, they will stop and never do it again.  If not, it's time to meet some new people.
420226
You can accept her. Well she has done what she has done, but she is your sister. She has come back to you that means she requires you. Everyone commits mistake. And she hasn't killed anyone. Its time for everyone in society to get matured. Now here is a chance.
146176
I really don't think something like that can be forgiven easily, your mother put herself before you and your sister and when something like that happens you you cant help but fear for your own kids.  Lots of people talk about unconditional love but I think there is exceptions and this is one of those.
629794
I could forgive them as I believe thats the only way to move forward, and then get rid of him and dont talk to her for a long, long time.Siblings should know better and that crossed the biggest line...
290461
I think you should not worry about what your sister does and focus on your style and your life. Getting annoyed with her is a waste of energy.
377506
What's done is done. You can't change the past, so don't dwell on it, you only waste your own time and energy. Take it as a leason in life to not expect soo much from other people. Deal with her as you have been before the incident, just be a bit more cautious.
125861
The secret to getting along with anyone is to accept them exactly as they are.  When your sister is rude to you that is just her being herself and you don't have to react and compound the problem.  Change the subject if you can.  Unfortunately, people won't always accept you exactly as you are, but will like you a whole lot more if you are never rude.  Good luck.  Thank your parents for grounding you because you have "learned your lesson"; and that has great shock value too <G>.
748597
i have 2 sisters both can be quite bad so i no were you are coming from one is older than me as one is younger i would ask her what is going on try and sort it out but dont be to hard treat her as a friend and she might open up to you in a good way good luck any more advice needed you can email me on your friend waiting  lauzmargretjones@yahoo.com
286604
You don't say what you did to make her mad. If the perceived offense was 'bad' enough she may never forgive you.\n\nTry being as nice as you can to her. (but don't go overboard and be annoying) Try to make up for what you did. Eventually she'll forgive you or you'll get tired of trying.\n\nYou can't make anyone forgive you, unfortunately. You may just have to chalk it up to experience and move on. And don't repeat the mistake with someone else. Learn from it!
1081824
Wow!  Sounds like my family.  My brother married her, and we still don't get along, 2 years later.  I try to just put up with her because of my brother.  But I don't see it getting better. \nMaybe your bro doesn't see her faults.  If you say something now, he might take a closer look and decide he doesn't like those things about her, either.  He might get mad at you, but he'll get over it, won't he?
630471
well try being nice to her and if that does not work than try to teach her a lesson that she will never forget.That is wat i did to my brother and trust me it worked!!!!!!!
641440
Yes, I do. I have a sister in law that is like that. She can be a very nice person, but she cannot stand it if she cannot have her way . People like that bring out the stubborn nature of me. I know what they are doing and I will not budge. She hates when I do it, it really makes her mad, but she learned to have respect for me.
673958
You should forgive her BUT speak to her and try and find out way she says nasty things, she probally has deeper problems and is taking her anger out on you
1033549
Then she is not really your friend,  I would not worry about it, everything that you do comes back to haunt you, it may be good or bad, but it always comes back.  Some of the best revenge is when the person does it to themselves.  I am a lazy person, and I do not like to hurt other people, but when they are mean to me, I just sit back and watch them stick their own foot in their mouth.  You know what I mean?