WHats the best YO MOMMA joke?
471914
yo mamma's so fat she had to go to sea world to get baptised.
292948
Yeah that is pretty lame! Try some Joke websites. Personally I like Yo momma jokes. No, not b/c I'm ghetto, but b/c they're funny! Anyway, any jokes I could tell you would probably offend SOMEONE out there! (Even the sex jokes.) But if I think of a good clean one, I'll edit it in later.
452212
What has the world come to? People don't seem to make good clean jokes any more (keyword: good)! Sheesh...\n\nHere's one:\n\nA pregnant woman gets into a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly 6 months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby. \n\nThe doctor replies, "Ma'am, you had twins! A boy and a girl. The babies are fine. Your brother came in and named them." \n\nThe woman thinks to herself, "Oh no, not my brother -- he's an idiot!" \n\nExpecting the worst, she asks the doctor, "Well, what's the girl's name?" \n\n"Denise," the doctor says. \n\nThe new mother thinks, "Wow, that's not a bad name! Guess I was wrong about my brother. I like Denise!" \n\nThen she asks the doctor, "What's the boy's name?" \n\nThe doctor replies, "DeNephew" \n\n:o)
409168
Yo mama has\nYo mama has one leg and a bicycle.\n\nYo mama has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses.\n\nYo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.\n\nYo mama has one hand and a Clapper.\n\nYo mama has green hair and thinks she's a tree.\n\nYo mama has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying.\n\nYo mama has 10 fingers--all on the same hand.\n\nYo mama has a glass eye with a fish in it.\n\nYo mama has a short leg and walks in circles.\n\nYo mama has a short arm and can't applaude.\n\nYo mama has so many freckles she looks like a hamburger!\n\nYo mama has three fingers and a banjo.\n\nYo mama has a wooden leg with a kickstand on it.\n\nYo mama has a bald head with a part and sideburns.\n\nYo mama has a wooden leg with branches.\n\nYo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.
1625
Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone\n\nYo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"\n\nYo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!\n\nYo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
218367
10- Yo mama is so ugly, she tried to enter the Ugly Contest and the scouts said no professionals!\n\n9- Yo mama is so fat, when she got hit by a bus she turned around and said, "Who threw that?"\n\n8- Yo mama is so fat, she walked in front of the TV and I missed 15 minutes of my show.\n\n7- Yo mama is so poor, she chased the garbage truck with a shopping list in her hand.\n\n6- Yo mama is so fat, after God said, "Let there be light," he said "Hey you, move out of the way."\n\n5- Yo mama is so fat, her belly button gets home 15 minutes before she does!\n\n4- Yo mama is so fat, when she went to the airport and asked for the next flight out, they stamped "Goodyear" on \nher butt and stuck her on the runway.\n\n3- Yo mama is so poor, the closest thing she's got to a car is a low rider shopping cart with a box on top.\n\n2- Yo mama is so poor, I saw a red wagon and as I rode down the street with it she said, "Hey, come back with our family car."\n\n1- Yo mama is so fat, I swerved to avoid her in the road and I ran out of gas.
469692
Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes looking at an orange juice box because it said "concentrate." \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, they had to burn the school down to get her out of the 3rd grade. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she sat in a tree house because she wanted to be a branch manager. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she stole a police car because she thought "911" meant Porsche. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she sat on the TV & watched the couch. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, when she was taking you to the airport and a sign said "Airport Left," she turned around and went home. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she put a ruler by her pillow to see how long she slept. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she was locked in a grocery store and starved. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, your house burned down because she couldn't find the "11" button to call 911. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she brought a towel to her carpool. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she stole free bread. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she got tangled up in a cordless phone. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she jumped out the window and went up. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she failed a blood test. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thought hamburger helper came with another person. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, if you gave her a penny for her thoughts, you'd get change back. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she sold the car for gas money. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, when your dad said, "It's chilly outside," she ran into the kitchen to get a bowl. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she got fired from the M&M's factory for throwing away all the W's. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she heard that 90% of all accidents occur around the home, so she moved. \n\n\nchapter 3: ugly \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals." \n\nYo mama's so ugly, her face is closed on weekends. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she gets up, the sun goes down. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she has to sneak up on bath water. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, her picture is on the inside of a Roach Motel. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she'd make a train take a dirt road. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, instead of having her own 900 number, she has her own 911 number. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when I took her to a haunted house, she came out with a paycheck. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when I took her to the zoo, the guy at the door said, "Thanks for bringing her back." \n\nYo mama's so ugly, people go as her for Halloween. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she has to trick or treat over the phone. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she makes onions cry. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she scares away blind kids. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't come back. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she was born, the doctor slapped her mama. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, the doctor's still slapping her. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she leaned over to hear, "snap, crackle, pop," all she heard was "Aargh! Get us out of here!" \n\nYo mama's so ugly, the psychiatrist makes her lie face down. \n\nYo mama's
520617
1.Yo mama so STUPID when your dad said it was chilli outside, she ran outside with a bowl and spoon!\n\n2. Yo mama so ugly that when she joined an ugly competion, they said, sorry, no professionals!
180673
101? I ONLY HAVE MY BEST 3 JOKES...HOPE IT DOESN'T OFFEND U\n\n1\n\nFresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\n2\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\n\n3\n\nThe mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's \nhouse. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her \ndaughter-in-law standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" she asked.\n\n"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the \ndaughter-in-law \nanswered.\n\n"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.\n\n"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.\n\n"Love dress? But you're naked!"\n\n"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it \nmakes me \nhappy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home \nfrom \nwork any minute."\n\nThe mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the \nway \nhome she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed, \nshowered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally \nher \nhusband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" he asked.\n\n"This is my love dress" she replied.\n\n"Needs ironing." he said.\n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
653708
yo momma so fat she dont need internet she already worldwide.\nyo momma so old when she went to school there werent history class!
654901
There are NO good "Yo Momma" jokes!
1100950
fat momma jokes always go over well, except when it's yo momma. just work on your delivery.
1004250
thats pretty good BUT\nisnt it supusto be YO Momma!!\nLOL!
1119971
best joke ever????????     GEORGE BUSH
654721
Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party! \n\nYo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!! " \n\nYo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!! \n\nYo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled, "HEY, KOOL-AID!" \n\nYo momma fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck. \n\nYo momma is so fat her waist size is equator!\n\nYo momma so fat shes on both side of the family. \n\nYo momma so fat when she walks around in Texas in high heels, she strikes oil! \n\nYo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale! \n\nYo momma so stupid, she studied for a drug test! \n\nYo momma so stupid, she thought, "Wu Tang" was an African orange drink! \n\nYo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl. \n\nYo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved! \n\nYo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order! \n\nYo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone! \n\nYo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
497221
YO MOMMA IS SOOOO FAT WHEN HE STEPPED ON A NICKEL SHE SQUEEZED A BOOGER OUT OF GEORGE WASHINGTON'S NOSE!!
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Is it okay if it isn't yo mama jokes?Becuase I only have one: Yo Mama so poor when she was kicking a can and I asked her, "What 'ja doin'," she answered, "moving"\n\nA man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement. \n\n"Listen," says the Doc, "I have migraines too, and the advice I'm going to give you isn't really anything I learned in medical school, but it's advice that I've gotten from my own experience. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. Then I have my wife sponge me off with the hottest water I can stand, especially around the forehead. This helps a little. Then I get out of the tub, take her into the bedroom, and even if my head is killing me, I force myself to have sex with her. Almost always, the headache is immediately gone. Now, give it a try, and come back and see me in six weeks." \n\nSix weeks later, the patient returns with a big grin. \n\n"Doc! I took your advice and it works! It REALLY WORKS! I've had migraines for 17 years and this is the FIRST time anyone has ever helped me!" \n\n"Well," says the physician, "I'm glad I could help." \n\n"By the way, Doc," the patient adds, "you have a REALLY nice house." \n\nWEIRD FACT OF THE DAY: The largest apple pie ever baked was forty by twenty three feet. \n\nON THIS DAY IN HISTORY: In 1919 1st issue of NY Daily News published. \n\nBORN ON THIS DAY: In 1956 - Chris Isaak (actor: Little Buddha, Silence of the Lambs, Married to the Mob, Twin Peaks; singer, songwriter: Wicked Game, Blue Hotel, LP: Silvertone). \n============================================================================================================================\n\n\n\n So there was an american, a black guy and a mexican that found a genie who granted them each a wish. The black guy asked that he and all of his brothers in America be taken back to their homeland of Africa, so the genie did it. The mexican asked that all of his people in America be brought back to their homes in Mexico, so the genie did that as well. Then the american said: "So you mean to tell me that all of the blacks and mexicans are gone?" and the genie replied "Yeah"; so the american said "Well then i'll have a coke." \n\n ============================================================================================================================\n\nA young man goes into a pharmacy and says to the\npharmacist, "Hello, could you give me condom.\nI'm going\nto my girlfriend's place for dinner and I think\nI may be in\nwith a chance!"\n\nThe pharmacist gives him the condom and the\nyoung man leaves. He soon returns and says, "Give me\nanother condom because my girlfriend's sister is very\ncute too. She always crosses her legs in a\nprovocative manner when she sees me and I think I might\nstrike it lucky there too."\n\nThe pharmacist gives him a second condom and as\nthe boy is leaving he turns back and says,"Go on,\ngive me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is\nstill pretty cute and when she sees me she always\nmakes eyes, and since she invited me for dinner, think\nshe is expecting me to make a move!\n\nDuring dinner, the young man is sitting with his\ngirlfriend on his left, the sister on his right\nand the mum facing him.\n\nWhen the dad gets there, the boy lowers his head\nand starts praying, "Dear Lord, bless this dinner\nand thank you for all you give us."\n\nA minute later the boy is still praying; "Thank\nyou Lord for your kindness."\n\nTen minutes go by and the boy is still praying,\nkeeping his head down.\n\nThe others look at each other surprised and his\ngirlf