I am in love with a married man, who happens to be my boss..what should I do?
403482
You should stay away from him.  Find some friends and go out with them and enjoy life as a single young woman.  Go to school.  Get involved in charity work.  Get a second job, heck, quit THIS job!  But please, please stay away from him!  If you allow yourself to get involved with someone who is married it always causes pain for someone.  Most of the time it causes pain for ALL three people involved!  \n\nAnd believe me, just because a man fights with a woman it doesn't mean that he doesn't love her and want to be with her.  Just because he tells you all the things she does to him that are wrong and that he doesn't like it doesn't mean he doesn't love her and want to be with her.  Even if he tells you he can't stand her it doesn't mean he doesn't love her and want to be with her.  (Are you getting the picture here?  I'm speaking from experience.)  \n\nPeople can need someone to talk to and get their feelings mixed very easily in situations like this.  But it always, always results in hurt.  Do you want her to hurt?  Do you want him to hurt?  Do you want their son to hurt?  Do you want to be hurt?  \n\nPlease, give all of this some SERIOUS thought!  Best of luck to you.
561757
Now I got your problem- Sweetie... You have to move on your life.. for all you know he might have been married all the time you had chatted with him.. And you dont love him... this is not love... love is when you actually let go of the person whom you say you love and when that person comes back to you... you can say its love. Right now its nothing more of an attraction. Get out and meet new people.. try n get over him... if he doesnt want have a relationship with you stop pusuing him...!!!
411620
Are you really in LOVE with HIM?  Or is it the idea of new love and that feeling of new love, that you're in love with?  Especially being a married woman, after a little bit of time you lose that new love/lust euphoria.  Perhaps there are some things that you are missing in your marriage that you are looking for in this new guy.  I know it doesn't answer your question, but perhaps you should work on the marriage that you're already in and see if you can improve it, because you must have LOVED your husband at one time
1093725
You need to realize that your not really falling in love with him but that you still have a crush on him and that your feelings are based upon the past and not on your current life.  He may be a wonderful guy but the reality of it is you really have no idea if you two could ever really be together and be happy together like you and your husband are.  The best way to deal with this is just to keep reminding yourself how lucky you are to have the life you do and stop focusing on what you can't/ don't have.
220836
this is a risky situation. If you really like him it might be better for you to leave your job and look for another so that there is no complications with the others if and when they find out. If he is interested in you, I believe you would know. If you are not sure then come out and ask him.
657028
In my opionion - keep your love life out of the office. It can have really ugly repurcussions other wise. Sorry.
161068
Of course you can love them both.......But you will have to love one better than the other. You will have to make a choice sooner or later as to which you love better. I imagine you made wedding vows to your wife. Did you promise your coworker anything? Who did you make promises to first? Will you have to break your promises to one of them in order to continue loving the other? If you think you can love them both the same, you can't.
737130
Let me put somethings in perspective. When you work with a person for a long period of time there may be times were you get confused and think you are in love. These feelings are what i like to call sexual tension. Usually the best way to get rid of it is to just get it out of your system but he is married. So i would avoid that all. Your best bet is to go to the club or go out with other friends. The way its sitting now you may help yourself if you do take him away but your also destroying a family. Besides if seen this time and time again . A wife can be very very vengful worse than a man bar none. your best bet is go to vegas get all that tension out of your system and there is no better place than there to do it. but be safe wht ever you decide take a cruise or just get a nice long vacation somewhere and think about your desicions.
1048646
Don't listen to your friends.  Enjoy the secret love affair, life's too short not to...though it doesn't sound so secret if your friends know.  Since you work in different departments it's no big deal.  If you worked in the same office on the same floor then it might be a big deal.  If you really care for this woman and she cares for you then shut out the negative remarks that others make about it.  It's no ones business but your own.  You have to remember, YOU ARE BOTH ADULTS....repeat....BOTH ADULTS.  Hopefully everything will work out.  If it doesn't then you have to remember you are both adults and will handle it in a professional manner.  You're not little children (Hello.)  \n\nYour friends are jealous....YES, they are...and PETTY also.  Shame on them!  They should be happy for you.  It's really sad they had to come down on you like that.  \n\nAlso, I know of lots of couples that met through work and fell madly in love, got married and are still married to this day.  It's wonderful.  Please don't listen to your so called friends....who I wouldn't call friends at all.  Also, you should not have made it any of their business in the first place.  And shame on you for that part!\n\nOne additional note:  Since you are already having the affair this is a senseless question to ask at this stage.  You should have asked it before you started the affair.  What difference will it make now.  Therefore, you might as well enjoy it.
552507
An infatuation which wll ruin your marriage. You're supposed to be a grown man, yet you sound like a child who can't control himself. Do you really want to ruin your marriage, his marriage and your friendship with him? Not a good idea at all. I think it's best to see a therapist as they can help you understand what you are feeling and you can think a little clearer on the issue. Then hopefully you can make the best decision, but trust me, making a pass at him could freak him out and the last thing you want is for him to feel uncomfortable around you.
451772
go and meet him but you have to see carefully if he actually loves you or not.\nIf you actually feel that he loves you, marry again
68050
Could be the one for you.  Somewhere outside of work, you should let that person know the way you feel.  He/she may feel the same.  But be prepared for the worst, and if that is the case, you have to move on and forget about it.  If you don't think you will be able to do that, forget about it and move on because you two will have to work together.
540129
Yes, he's your supervisor in the four corners of your workplace, but saying what you feel in the right place at the right time (like After work hours and far from his office; a coffee shop a block away will do) would give you peace of mind. Just make sure that you can still maintain your Professionalism towards him no matter what his response, if not, it's better to keep it to yourself and hope it's just a CRUSH that fades away in a day or two. Well, it's just my opinion and I'm sure it's different from the others. Good luck!
856384
let me ask you this, how did you get into this position? how did you let this other man maneuver his way into your heart?...\n\ndo you beleive in the sanctity of marriage? if so, do what you can to get this other guy out of your life...\n\ndoes this guy know you're married? if not, that you're fault...if so, would you want to marry a guy who doesn't have respect for a married couple?...\n\nplease do the right thing and be more responsible with who you get close to...
349208
Back away from the married man and no one gets hurt!LOL Seriously though, don't put yourself in a position to where you become involved with a married man. He will NEVER,NEVER,NEVER be able to be there for you when you need him, on holidays, for vacations... he'll never be there in the night when you just want someone to talk to or snuggle with...he'll never be totally with you because he already HAS someone he is obligated to spend his time and money on. You can get past those feelings for him that you are developing if you stay away from him as much as possible. As for the other guy, if you have developed feelings for someone else while you were with him, then maybe your feelings for him are not what they should be. Try staying away from both men for awhile and give yourself some time alone to sort out your feelings. Right now you can't be good for either one of these men OR yourself. Good luck to you!!
306746
First figure out what feelings these are you have and how strong.Second imagine yourself without the person who at one time (and probably still do)you loved with all your heart,(loved enough to make her your wife). If imagining her gone and with another man doesn't bother you, then I'd say "its over",but if it does BOTHER you-Then stay away from whatevers tempting you,and focus on yourself and your wife.
934597
Your post does not discuss why you want to marry your "collegue" or how you feel about him.  Without knowing if this is what you truly want all I can say is follow your heart which means if you love him and want to marry him and it will not cause you to lose your family then marry him but if you are marrying your "collegue" because you observed a "quite good" nature then you should wait and listen to those you trust which sounds as if it may be your family.