How do you tell if a guy isn't marriage minded?
414251
Well, I don't mean to be critical but I think you may be thinking too materialistically. Just because a guy has a sports car or a one bedroom condo doesn't mean that he isn't ready to be married. What kind of place do you live in, what kind of car do you drive? I'm sure every guy that is truely ready for marriage is not all set up w/ a mini van and a 3bdrm house. They like us are just waiting for the right person to come along. My advice...get to know the guy before judging him. Good luck:)
510340
If you can see he is not truly commited:\n\nIf you can bear with it, then you should know it is time to move on. You know this is not gonna work out. Where will this lead to, if you go on like this? He will never be yours. \n\nWhat is the point of mixing around with this sort of people? In fact, you should know by now he isn't worth it. \n\n\nIf you can see he is commited but hesitant:\n\nThen find out why. There must be something troubling him.\nHis family opposition perhaps. Try to resolve it with him. If it is his family, perhaps you can find some ways to present yourself to impress them. \n\nTry also to tell him it is time to make his own decision and not let others interfere. After all, if you both marry, it will be your new life and no one elses.
389526
That all depends if she or he only wants a friendship or are they looking for a steady relationship.  For example, my friend and I have been dating over 8 years and we are comfortable with that.  My friends are saying what are you waiting for. I tell them that I am not looking for a marriage.
447143
not what you might think.  most young guys think with their package and not their brain.  If the person was following your thoughts then He would think of compatibility in social lines not the coupling thing.  Each person is different and follows patterns that are formed by earlier relationships and how mature they are.  You should be concerned with your thoughts and if Yo9u can look at the relationship's potential.  The hard part is getting thru the smokescreens.  Be objective and put your expectations up against what the guy has to offer.
221396
You'll just have a deep inner peace.  You won't have to second guess whether or not he is honest, sincere, and faithful.  If you have to guess at any of those then your internal/spirit man is telling you something isn't right.  Sometimes we have to take a big step back to really see someone.  Good luck to you!
853861
Marriage is pretty serious or at least it should be.  A proposal by text message is pretty lame and pathetic.  I think it is a sign that he does not take marriage or you seriously enough.  You should not have to wonder about it.  Sorry you've had a bad experience twice, but hang it there, someone will come along that will treat you right.
1141706
Marriage is the legitimate way to go for people who love each other AND who want to be together. I do think, on a man's standpoint, there's nothing a woman can/should tell us to get married. See, if a man gets married because you convinced him to, then it feels as if it was not our decision, and later down the way, resentment adds to all those roadblocks marriage is known to unearth. \n\nI kinda feel like him. I have been married. I have a family, and I have been through ugly things that I would not have gone through if I had stayed single. \n\nNow this is what you should do... since marriage is going to put y'all together on a 24/7 basis, then test the water. Start spending a lot of time together, doing every thing together, then if things are still nice, move in, and live together, doing every thing together which will put y'all in a married-like situation. And then and only then, if you guys really love each other you guys should go thru every thing just fine and pass the little disagreements and tie the knot. So don't rush, let marriage be a logical outcome of a long lived situation... who knows, something might be wrong with him for him to be divorced twice (he gotta be doing something wrong), you might save yourself some ugly things and a divorce... good luck!
404942
When you have his last name and his ring \nthen is when you do the wild thing\ntell him no commitment your not beinging fussy\nbut if your not his wife he gets no pussie.
479767
When it feels like it would be the logical next step.\nAsk yourself the following questions....\n\n1. Do we love, trust and respect each other?\n2. Do we share the same expectations of marriage? \n3. Do we share things in common that make us shout, cry and laugh? \n4. Do we agree on major life issues, such as children, family and friends, where we'll live and style of living? \n5. Do we have a way of managing conflict? \n6. Do we share the same views on infidelity and commitment to avoiding temptation? \n7. Do we love each other just the way we are today, without any hidden agenda to try to change the other?\nYou don't have to agree on everything. The important thing is that you and your partner have talked through these questions and both feel confident you can live and work together, knowing what the other believes
927058
Do they want kids? How are you going to handle finaces? Do they have any doubts about you two? No stds! How far would they go to stay together (counsling, etc.) What are their goals and carear plans. The rest you should know before you think of marriage
225426
Wow.  That's a lotta question, that is, girl!  Let me translate roughly, see if I understand you.  There's a man, older or younger than yourself you have not said, who is a dear friend, who treats you very well, but something is missing in your response to him.  So you say, at one point, "no way what am i talking about . . . i don't know what I feel."  Oh, honey, I know old people may seem to be laughing at you when they say things like this, but I do, really, know the feeling.  \n\nSeems whenever you're confronted with an important decision (am I right that someone or some circumstances are pressuring you to marry him?), and you are of two minds about it, you need time for those two minds to have it out.  So you beg for time.  It's attractive, gives him hope, and does not burn your bridges.\n\nThen you must, in good faith, use that time for self analysis.  What is it that is missing in being with this man, in imagining being with him for the rest of your life?  Is there something that you fear will happen to make that something to regret?  If so, focus on that fear and ask yourself some real honest questions about (1) how reasonable and rational is your fear; (2) how much has to do with a Hollywood-produced image of romantic love that just isn't in the time you spend with this man who apparently is pretty sincere in wanting you for his wife.  Am I right so far?\n\nThen the question has to be, how fair is it to compare a real, flesh-and-blood man with those guys who are up on that screen precisely because they look good.  They look good; some of them real, real good.  So what?  What's that got to do with the real world?  If a man does not seem downright ugly to you, which is far more flexible than most people imagine, then how kind and good, how sincerely your friend and partner, both in and out of the bedroom, is far, far more important than playing out some Hollywood scene.  You know it already, but maybe you need old auntb93 to remind you.
645218
take your time, Love will reveal it's self.\ndoes he call you, or do you do everything in the relationship. test him, see if he really cares. don't bug him about it or give him a big list of what you are looking for, just let him be and see what kind of guy he is. you can't change people so find out if he is really suitable for you through experience in time. you are probably young enough that it isn't crucial that you get married right now. take your time if you can....it reveals many things!
170710
If you're not sure, then don't. Marriage is a big step and commitment. You don't want to half-a$$ it.
272991
If he is dead set on not getting married, then agree to disagree and move on...look for someone with the same future goals.
866926
Age is a important factor in your question. If you are very young maybe he signed one of the abstinence pledges, to not have sex until marriage. If you are older, you may want to talk to him and find out if he is serious about your relationship and if he thinks about marriage at all, find out where he is at, or you are wasting valuable time, where you could find someone who is serious about your relationship, don't be a filler for when he has nothing better to do.\nTake care of yourself. You deserve to be happy. Good Luck.
150630
It is pretty common to be a little unsure.  I think that even continues into the marriage sometimes.  You would be wise to ask yourself why you aren't sure though.  Make sure it isn't anything that goes against your personal values, morals and priorities.  If it doesn't, and you love him, commit to staying committed.  The most important thing to making a relationship work is that neither of you is willing to give up.
296376
I'm a guy, but I think that if someone does not want to make a commitment to you, it may be time to move on.  I would ask why he feels that way...is it indecision, fear, immaturity, wanting to play the field or does he not love you enough?