What should I do to tell my wife of 5 years that I'm in love another woman?
408526
I'm in the same boat as you, I've been with my husband for 5 years and things are getting worse and worse, the happy life we had went down the toilet along time ago and all we do is fight. It's not easy i don't know how to tell him either, but the person I'm seeing makes me feel like I'm worth something, not useless. maybe we can figure out something, my email is under my info
1088826
Don't it is not your place.  That priviledge belongs to her husband.  You can however, get some concrete proof, pull him aside and let him know you know and that he needs to do what is right.  Guilt will play the biggest role, next to fear you will say something.  \nThis is between two married people, not three.  Of course your going to say , "there is three", but not in their marriage.  This is something that  they have to work out between them.  \nThe best role you can be is when he does tell her, and she needs a shoulder it should be you.  You should not let her know that you know, at least not until the two of them handle this in whatever way they need to.  \nIt is going to be very difficult for her and hard for you to remain silent with the information that you have.  \nPeople cheat for many reasons and the reason they cheat has many sides, or variables.  One thing that remains a constant with infidelity in a marriage:\nTwo people make it, two people break it.\nSomething is lacking in their relationship from both sides and in order for them to find out what that is and make a decision to work on it or not, they both have to acknowledge responsibility for the good and the bad.  \nStay out of this, be there for your friend when she needs you.  \nI assure you, once he knows that you have evidence and that you, as her friend know about the affair, he will come clean.  That doesn't mean the marriage is over, or will recover, but it will certainly allow them the chance to fix whatever is wrong between them. \nYou may be a "best friend" but you do not share "pillow talk" and you certainly are not priviy to their personal intimate conversations that husbands and wives have.  \nDo the right thing stay out of this.\nAs with Bill and Hillary Clinton, this is a maritial problem, not for the cover of your local gossip column.  \nIf they love each other enough, things will work out for the best, no matter what that turns out to be.
750773
Why dont you discuss it with your wife.  You said that she is a sweetie, work it out with her.
445175
Just speak from your heart. Tell her everything that she does that you love. Tell her what you love about her character. Tell her of things that remind you of her. Be real. She will love it.
1082332
First off, she is NOT your wifes best friend if she would make advances towards you. If I were the wife I would not want to know if it has all been stopped and I mean stopped. Do NOT ever be alone with this woman again. She (and your stupidness) could ruin your marriage. I've been in this situation with my spouse of 35 years. I was the stupid one and I too came to my senses. When he tried again I told him it never happened. He got the message. I vowed never to put myself in that situation again. I did NOT tell my husband and the other person eventually disappeared from our lives.  I am glad I did not tell.  There would have always been that doubt planted.  I know I have behaved ever since but he might wonder. Should the best friend decide to tell then you have your problem to deal with.  Avoid her unless wife is around. Some will say it was just a kiss but there is a seriousness here.  Good luck
535432
Just do it. If she's already telling you this stuff then her marrige isn't worth the paper she signed on the license.\n\nJust don't fall in love with a worthless weakling like her.  Do it, do it good and then say bye-bye.\n\nSplooch!
506167
No 'nice' ways anymore.  Brutal (but sensitive) honesty time.\n1.  Admit your fault in the situation.  You shouldn't have started things up if you knew you were going to get back together with your wife.\n2.  Tell her your side.  Marriage is a commitment and you aren't the kind of person who wants to get divorced and trivialize that commitment so you're doing everything you can... etc, etc.\n3.  Compliment her by reminding her she can find someone much better.\n4.  Let her say how she feels and respond without getting defensive.\n5.  Under no circumstances are you to use her as a 'in case it doesn't work out' friend.  That isn't fair and it's not right.\nGood luck.
374820
You would propose to her like any other woman. Take her to a nice restaurant or walk in the park/beach. Then when you feel that the time is right, tell her how much you love her and wouldn't change one thing about her. You could then tell her that you want to spend the rest of your life with her and so on, use feeling that come from the heart. Then ask, will you marry me? Whether in English or Spanish, it doesn't matter because it came from within and that's a language we all speak. Hope she says, yes!
582012
It seems as if you have a very strong desire to remain faithful to your wife.  That is definitely a good starting point.  I would not, however, do as one person suggested and ask your wife to not bring this friend around anymore.  Doing that would only serve to justify (in your wife's mind) her fear that you may do something with her friend.  And, I would not have a sit-down conversation between the three of you either.  This route may make any already sticky situation far worse.  The fact of the matter is...this situation exists solely between you and your wife.  Having said that...here are a few suggestions.\n\nFirst, your wife seems to be at a point (emotionally) where she needs some very strong reassurances from you.  I believe this is where the two of you need to start.  Though you have not metioned how long the two of you have been together...I am assuming it has been quite some time.  The fact that you have children together only serves to lend credibility to this assumption.  I am going to go a step further and assume that because the two of you have been together for quite some time AND have children...the time that the two of you share intimately has decreased tremendously.  This is neither a bad thing...nor is it unusual.  Life has taken over and each of you spends more time tending to the responsibilities of life than you spend nurturing the bond that brought you to this point.\n\nIf the above assumptions are accurate...then I would suggest shifting gears a bit.  If your wife is, in fact, seeking some reassurances from you...I will tell you that the physical, mental, and emotional ones will go alot further than the verbal ones.  Yes, you have stated that she does not have to worry about what you may or may not do with her friend.  However, have you done anything physically, mentally, or emotionally that would serve to back-up your verbal statements?  If she is truly concerned about this issue...it may help if you let her see and feel your commitment to her in addition to hearing it from you.\n\nArrange for a night where the two of you are alone.  Bring her flowers, take her out for dinner (or actually make a dinner for the two of you), make her your sole focus for the evening, and let her know just how much you love and appreciate all that she is to you.  These are simple things to do.  Unfortunately, many people overlook the value in such simple things as the demands of life increase.  If you were to take the time to do the above stated things on a regular basis...I am sure you will find your wife's insecurity would diminish.  Good luck to both of you.
819663
Well, I would say if your "love" is married to someone else, then she is not YOUR "love".  Grow up, get over it!  She obviously wasn't in love with you the way you are her.  If you still talk to your "love", then just keep being her friend don't try to ruin anything between her and her husband.  If you really love her, be happy for her that she is happily married to the love of her life.
1115272
I think you need to make your feelings as regards this relationship with another woman known to your husband. he is your husband and you have to save your marriage. tell him he needs to see the damage his relationship with this woman is doing to your marriage. as you have spoken to the woman and she has refused to let go, tell your husband the woman has no respect for his marriage, he needs to choose between his friendship with the other woman and his marriage (his wife and kids). dont go fighting him, do things with wisdom, love and gentless.endeavour to always show him love and always communicate with him.communication is very important in a relationship
322429
I feel for you...\nIf she is marrying someone else then there's nothin you can do except to let go of your guilt feelings and your love for her.  You don't have a choice but to move on or be miserable for the rest of your life.
441359
Tell her.  She may feel the same about you.  The best lovers start out as friends because you already know what pleases the other person.
287437
She is over 18, loves another guy, and doesnt love you?\nKiss your marriage goodbye, sweety\n\nAnd you should accept it. She doesn't love you. You need to find a woman who will love you always.
281044
First you really should talk to your wife, tell her that you want out of the marriage. You shouldnt be with someone if you are married to another... After you and your wife seperate then you can think about the other woemn,.,
722170
I am a wife and to be honest I would say Heck Yeah!!! you should tell your wife but, let me say this the first thing I would say to you (as my husband) What the F@?K were you doing looking at her, changing clothes anyway!!! Now that's an honest answer as a wife, now just to be on the real. let me say, she knew you were there, believe it, and she did it as a show for you, so if you don't want to start no stuff in your marriage I would tell you to tell your wife that it's time for her friend to leave before she goes any further and you have to explain why you & the friend are so friendly now, follow me?\nI want you to realize something right now, women do not have respect for other women when it comes to things of human nature, it's their way, always, have you ever notice that two brothers can share a bedroom all the way up to highschool if they have to but, girls No Way!!! as soon as two sisters hit a certain age (normally around 7-8 yrs-olds.) They have to be separated, that is because they can't stand each other's smell, it's not a funk or anything, it's just (Our Nature) Dude get her out of your house before it's too late, that is if you honestly want your marriage to be okay.
887360
After 36 years of marriage i guess i am just about qualified to answer you. It is a hard road to travel.. believe me!! you have to work at staying married for this long. It is not all sweetness and light as there have been times when i have wanted to just pack up and go but i have a deep sense of responsibility to my family, even though our kids are all grownups now.My wife has no doubt felt the same at times. So the answer is..Think about what you are going to do, before you do it and consider what effect it might have on your other half. Tell her that you love her often and show it!! Flowers and little treats work wonders. Keep your lust alive as sex is important even as you get older. It is the best way of communicating your love for each other. Do not have secrets that might hurt the other one. Be truthful. Make time for each other, hold hands when you walk out together. Sneak a kiss in public. Look after each other and always back each other up. I could go on and on but i am sure that you get the idea. I am 61 and she is 56. We still sleep together  sharing a double bed. Like I say,love, lust, hard work and consideration are important as is being freinds as well.