introvert vs. extrovert....help?
407361
I hope that the extroverts should really be careful of what they say and stop throwing their judgmental ideas about the introverts. The introverts should not be label as 'Shy' or 'Timid', like you have said - they just 'laid back', quiet or listen to others.\n\nIt is so unfair for the introverts to live in this extroverts dominated world - always to be the ones who being oppressed and misunderstood.\n\nI think it is not the majority less accept the introverts, they just simply don't know or not willing to understand the introvert people.\n\nWhen encountering an extrovert, the best thing and the only thing you can do, is to be yourself. And whenever people throw their idea about you, you need to clarify their opinions. Sometimes, introverts need to speak up a little just to defend themselves.\n\nI hope that you can do better next time and not be trouble by their unfit compliments. Just remember that you are unique in this extrovert world, you are gifted compare with the extroverts.\n\nGood Luck\n\nYour introvert fellow
177619
Because if you are like me, when I'm around people I don't seem to fit in.  I am not very sociable mainly because I am shy.  I am not not good with small talk.  When I am home I am not under all the pressure of trying to fit in and be sociable.
523972
I am a definite introvert. I find that I tend to have thought things out before others, and that I know my self better then those who spend so much of their time and energy playing to a persieved audience.
944949
I had been shy but I am not shy now yet, I am quiet like you so being shy is different from being quiet. I think when you have not something to talk and do not talk you are not shy and you can call yourself absolutely normal. but it sometimes occurs to me(us) that I want to start conversation with a stranger (or even a familiar person) but I can not. I think these times I am afraid not to have a good impact on him/her and be rejected. this fear is because of low self esteem  which roots in painful experiences in the past(you may remember when expressed yourself, they laughed at you).\nNow, I hope these tips be helpful for you:\n1-in such situations where you want to start a conservation, remind yourself that the pain of rejection is far less than the pain of regret. \n2-try to be a starter. do not wait for others to make conservation. I think, being a starter requires social skills which you may have not enough of it. but, the only way to acquire skills is experience .you would fail in some of these experiences and it hurt you but remember; "NO PAIN, NO GAIN".\n3-Read some books about "First Impressions". they help you to rise your self esteem.\n4-do not label yourself as shy. when you repeatedly say "I am shy" accordingly you will act like a shy person.\n5-Look at talkative persons. they usually do not care about what they say and what the effect is.I think it is better not to be too much worried about our expressions.
432960
Being introverted first off. Also, not wanting to hang around crowds of people. Often not knowing what to say in situations and conversations. Also, people telling you to keep quiet, and stop saying stupid things has an effect as well. Hope this helped some.
665084
Yeah...it's hard to be outgoing when people already assume you're going to be shy. I was voted Most Shy when I was a senior in high school, but I marched over to the yearbook room and told them flat out that I didn't want it and they could give it to the runner up. Because, despite what the snobby popular kids who decide these things thought, I was past my shy era by then. I'd grown out of it.\n\nI HAD always been shy. In middle school and early high school, I was just quiet and I didn't like being the center of attention. I din't know who I was yet, I guess, and I just never had the confidence. I didn't think I was interesting enough to have people like me.\n\nWhen I was about 15 or 16, I suddenly came to the realization of what I wanted to go to college for (to be a game warden...an outdoor cop) and that changed everything. I think having a really strong interest like that made me come out of my shell. Maybe it was the fact that I was interested in telling everyone about it that did it. And it might have been Lord of the Rings...because I became really obsessed with it about then.......perhaps having those two obsessions just made me so eager to talk about them that I quit being shy. I'm not sure.....anyway, I'd start talking up in class more, and I'd have debates with people where before I'd just let them win.\n\nI'm not sure how this pertains to you...I guess the way to get over being shy is NOT by doing some outrageous stunt. That'll make people notice you, perhaps, but that's affecting THEM, not you. It makes them see you, but doesn't make YOU more outgoing. Instead, try to change yourself, not them. Smile at EVERYONE. Make eye contact with people, and say hello and smile at everyone you see. Speak up in class, and say things to people you don't even know. Like, if youre walking down the hallway and you see someone with cool shoes or something, tell them as you walk past, "Hey, cool shoes!" You don't have to extend the conversation...it's just a way of talking to more people. The more people you verbalize with, the better. If it helps, you can do something that makes you stand out, but without being obnoxious. Like...wear brighter colors so that you're more noticeable. Maybe wear bright blue socks everyday, so that people actually have something to relate with you. Having people think of you as, "That person with the socks" is better than them ignoring you completely.\n\nAnd the number one point: confidence. Stop worrying about what THEY think, instead realize that you're your own person, and they should like you for that. Learn to LAUGH. When people see that you laughing and smiling, they'll see that you're not shy anymore. And don't forgetm it's OK to be wierd. You're defined by what makes you different.\n\nGood luck!
619376
outgoing. opposite of introverted which is me ;)
1153479
You need to open yourself up. Say what you feel (as long as it's appropriate), and be confident. Really listen to people and try to establish common ground. Ask questions to get to know people on a more personal basis- like where they grew up, their career choice, their opinions about whatever. Stay in contact w/ people and don't be silent or bored- have fun.
1048206
I was always the quiet one, but when you do finally speak up people definitely listen.  I prefer to be the listener and watcher.  See how people interact and react.  You can learn a whole lot more being the one who listens instead of the one who talks all the time.  Be open when you want to be and speak up when you feel passionate about something or someone.  You'll be fine!
214006
Shyness is just the insecurity of ones self. Be confident and sure about yourself. If you aren't no one else will be either. Learn to trust yourself as well as love yourself. You be fine. GOD BLESS
837358
Embarrassed? No. But nervous, Yes. Everybody gets nervous, just that some people aren't that obvious. Even an introvert may get nervous getting onto a stage in front of many people. What you need is to get used to speaking in front of large groups and learn to deal with it. There are lessons and classes on public speaking, they are even offered in high schools and colleges.
907597
the unsecured and introverted\n\n:> peace\n.
888840
DEVELOP AN OUTGOING SOCIAL PERSONALITY\nTHE TENTH FUNDAMENTAL\n\n \n\nThe Tenth Fundamental is "Develop an Outgoing, Social Personality." \n\nThis Fundamental goes right to the heart of achieved happiness. As the research has clearly shown, there is no doubt that one of the most characteristic traits of the happiest individuals is an extroverted, social personality. \n\nHappy people are quite extroverted, according to research studies. (Note: add research refs. here). \n\nExtroversion, "an interest more in other people than in oneself" (according to dictionary definitions), is highly characteristic of happy people. Indeed, in my lectures over the years, I have referred to extroversion as being one of "the two Hallmark Qualities of the happy person." The other, optimism, we talked about in an earlier Chapter. \n\nTHE HAPPINESS-EXTROVERSION CONNECTION \n\nWhy has the research found such a strong connection between extroversion and happiness? There are a number of reasons... \n\nTo begin with, naturally enough, extroverted people usually spend a lot more of their time in social situations than less extroverted persons do. Thus they tend to maximize their participation in the "Number 1" source of happiness: social activity. \n\nClearly, this should make sense. If social activity is the most happiness-producing of all human activity, then those who's basic personality attracts them to such activity should well be happier. \n\nBut this in not the only happiness-benefit for the extrovert. An indirect benefit comes with wide social activity: that of meeting "special people"... \n\nBy "special people," I mean the kind of person that might end-up being a good friend or love-mate. Mathematically speaking, it is far more probable that a person who attends several social gatherings during a month will happen into many more "special people," over a year, than a person who never goes out at all. \n\nSo, here again, the extroverted, socially comfortable person maximizes his or her "happiness possibilities." In general, they have a happier time at a social affair than they would staying at home, but they also increase their chances of making new contacts which may lead to closer relationships, which can only boost their "happiness possibilities" even further. \n\nThe final reason why extroversion and happiness shows such a strong connection in the research, has to do with self-esteem. \n\nAs we detailed in the last chapter, self-esteem is a critical ingredient in both happiness and mental health. And it is clear from the research that extroversion is a typical trait of those who have a healthy, positive self-image. \n\nPeople with a positive self-image and a high degree of self-esteem (people who "like themselves," as we put it earlier) are more likely to be extroverted than introverted. They tend to be be more outgoing and expressive; they tend to be more self-assured and comfortable with others; they like people and enjoy social contact; and because they "like themselves," they are usually much more authentic, natural, and spontaneous around others -- and this only paves the way to more successful socializing! \n\nIt doesn't take a happiness scientist to figure-out why extroverted people rocket their way to happiness so easily. By being so social, they participate more than others in the primary source of happiness (social interaction). By participating more in this primary source, they have a lot more fun. By widening their "social radius" they increase their chances of finding friendships and love opportunities. By being extroverted, they become more comfortable and natural in social situations as time goes by. In becoming more comfortable and natural, the better they are liked by others. The better they are liked by others, the better they feel about themselves. The better they feel about themselves, the more com
682367
outgoing. I'm like you, shy until u get to know me. for me,  its kinda hard to talk to someone who is shy as well cuz we just end up not talking.
174112
I am 32 and proud to be an introvert.  :-D  Being introvert isn't bad, just a different way of taking in the world. :-)\n\nTho, it IS nice to see that there are some introverts here at YA!  *huggles*   I did write an article on introversion that I learned from a book I read about introversion.  "The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extroverted World" by Marti Olsen Langey.
1100223
Personally, I think the sort of person who is immediately loud and outgoing with someone they've never met is a nuisance.  I start off quiet and gain confidence and a develop a rapport with people over time.  If you just jump in there and talk to them like you're best buddies, people (English people anyway), find it irritating and intrusive.\n\nIf you feel shy or awkward in social situations and don't feel you can join in, then maybe you would benefit from being more outgoing.  But you can't just flick a switch and suddenly be more relaxed with people.  When I was at college, I was painfully shy.  As you grown older, you are thrown into situations where you have no choice but to ignore the impulse to hide in the corner.   If you don't, then you'll end up with no friends, no girlfriend, a crappy job and a dull life.  The worse part is that people mistake shyness for rudeness, so as well as feeling isolated everyone will think you're an idiot!\n\nAs you get older, you realise that your life is defined by your relationships with others.  No one lived a happy, fulfilling life by avoiding human contact.  If you're shy, then the first part of building a relationship with others is mostly about acting more confident that you are, asking people questions rather than silently ignoring them, and being friendly without being pushy or presumptuous.  It'll soon come naturally.
232466
Socialization.  The shy person must try to stablish conversations with people how like to do the same things for example, you like to read, you must visit a library and start talking with the employers then compare books with someone, ask for references...if you like shopping, ask for details of what you are going to buy...if you are in a party talk about the person how invite you but with others person in the party, avoid answers like yes or no...try to be more detailed in the conversation...I used to be shy and nobody can believe me...good luck, start talking