I like everything about my new girlfriend apart from she's overweight. What should I do?
403699
First of all, to the guy who said "get another girl..a slim one of course" you are mean, and didn't even address the question. Not everyone is as superficial as you are.\n\nNow, if you think she's cute, and are mostly dissapointed that you can't enjoy physical activities with her because she always finds excuses not to go, then I suggest that you kindly explain to her that its something you really enjoy, and something you want her to be a part of, and that you can take it slow if she wants. I think you're right about her being afarid she won't be able to keep up (thats how I'd feel) \n\nYou could also just stop by her house and ask her to take a walk with you, or take her to go swimming at a lake or something...activities that are romantic as well as counting as excersise. Once she is able to be comfortable around you in these sort of situations, she'll agree to them more and more, and most likely start to lose a bit of weight. \n\nAnd if she says she goes to the gym, why not suggest that the two of you go together? \n\nJust keep in mind that healthy weight loss takes a lot or work, pateince and time - and this applies to you as well as her. Be supportive and don't get impatient.\n\nSorry this was long, hope it helped.
1008563
Well my girlfriend who is truly my soul mate is chubby, but is really beautiful and has a great personality. I wouldn't say that I'm dating her because she's chubby, but I'm dating her because I lover her eyes, her smile, and both her inner and outer beauty.\n\nTo me she could have been skinny --- fat and I would still date her because of who she is.
532318
Talk to her and let her know how you feel.  It sounds like she's starting to weigh you down.  It's obvious you care about her but, this might not be the right person for you.  You have to ask yourself if you are getting anything positive out of this relationship and if they are the things you want in life.  If you're not, then it's time to move on.
221173
hand over your wallet and agree with everything she says...lol.....  seriously every girl/ women is different...  find out from the one your with what makes her happy! good luck !
49559
People like this are really difficult to SHOW that they are the right height for their size etc. You should find some scientific information showing the proper weight for her height, body mass index etc. and then start talking with her about her health and its importance. Im 5' 8" and weigh 150. I dont consider myself fat. I think I look pretty hot actually...but a lot of people would consider that heavy for a woman. I wear size 11 jeans. Basically, it isnt about being fat...it's about looking great no matter what you weigh. Anyone can pull off looking great but in order to look great you have to feel your best about yourself. This takes work.\n\ntell her she looks great, dont do it just to be doing it. Compliment how something accents her figure or something like that. A specific compliment.
907932
You could go hiking together, take up a new sport together (one that you're more-or-less on equal footing with), or just take walks.  Whatever you do, do not let her think for one minute that you don't accept her as she is or that you're trying to change her.  That will be the kiss of death to your relationship.  Believe me, she knows she has gained weight.  Don't do something "subtle" like buying her a bicycle or giving her a gym membership.  That is NOT the way to motivate someone.
818919
Have you ever heard of self esteem. Well that seems to be what you are lacking. You shouldn't be worried about what's going on around you and what someone else is thinking but what you feel. If you feel your overweight YOU need to do something about it. You need to be better for you to become a better person. AND PLEASE FOR GOD SAKE'S YOU DO NOT NEED A MAN! If anything you need to leave them alone for awhile and do for you. Work on you. From a ladi that's been there. Care about home first then invite someone to visit.
62828
My Sweetie Pai!!\n\nDo not let anybody change you not for ANY reason, if u are happy with your body then stay that way,\n\n you know what!! GOD knew what he was doing when he created different people with different shape so that we can pick and choose, if he is looking for a thin girl he must go and find himself one.\n\nJust remember that in life we will always meet people who will try to change us just because we love them and we must learn to take a stand on those people cause they will end up destroying us and we end-up with a low confidence and probably low self esteem.\n\ni cannot tell u what to do BUT i can suggest that talk to your boyfriend and try to stand up to him and explain that u are unable to meet his expectations due to the fact that u are very much happy with the way u look and u are not ready for a new change!!\n\ni hope this little advice will be of help to u.\nMay God help u to make the right decision.
1068127
I am in the same boat. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and i want him to lose weight too.  He is very lazy when it comes to walking so the benifit i have, is i cook him less fatty foods and don't buy as many sweets now .  I have told him im going for a walk and he has actually came a few times.  The problem is as a guy he don't care. Women tend to me more watchful with their weight. As in your case she may not really care neither what people think of her. So the first step is to see how she feels about her weight.  If she would like to lose some weight then u got the cat in the bag and can start helping her.  If she doesnt' care, well believe me she probably isn't going to try to lose any weight. It sounds like you haven't been together real long so i would give it sometime yet and see.  She may surprise you.  Let the relationship develop a little more before jumping into that.  I wish u all the luck .
951176
If you truly love her, tell her you are concerned about her health . make plans to exercise with her, walking, going to the gym, etc. I'm sure she is not happy with her weight gain either. do this is a team. you might be surprised at the results!
130136
If you are happy, stay with your current girlfriend.  Age is not a big deal...but KEEP YOUR PANTS ON until you are both old enough to afford to support yourselves!
1179407
First you have to honestly ask yourself whether the changes you want are out of love for her, or out of love for yourself?  If they are out of love for her, then you'll definitely have to be an active supportive participant in this.  Exercise WITH her.  (Don't wear her out all at once; she'll be intimidated.)  Cook WITH her... try some low-fat cookbooks with lots of veggies and minimal carbs and meat.  Good-tasting food that doesn't make you look like a blueberry muffin IS possible, but it takes work.\n\nAlso, be sure you let her know that you love her and you're concerned for her well-being.  If she cannot accept that, there's not much you can do.  But if she can, you could really go somewhere with it.  One of my friends was very overweight... ate way too much and was extremely lazy.  Well, she is still overweight.  BUT she is losing some of it and eating more healthy and getting into shape.  And it's all thanks to the good influence of her boyfriend.  Now I don't think he's such a good influence in some other areas; but about that he's good.\n\nAnd finally... wear her out with some good sex.  hehe.  ;)  J/k... sort of.
230787
Hi David, I don't think your weight is the problem. You sound like a really decent guy but I do think you have a self-confidence issue and by telling yourself that your weight 'problem' is stopping you getting girls, it could be that you attitude on yourself if stopping you getting them.  No one wants to go out with someone who they feel NEEDS to be constantly told they look ok (but I can tell you now-you look fine to me!)and overall, most girls I know (the ones who have the most successful relationships...) dont have hot sexy guys, they have average Joes who treat them like princesses!  If a girl didnt want to go out with you because of your weight then shes not worth it-the shallow cow!  What would make her think shes so perfect to be worthy of YOU?! :-) Another good hint is dont always go for the girls who look the best either, go for the ones you get on with, make you laugh, make you FEEL sexy!!!  I really hope you find her, you sound like a genuinely nice guy.
60159
Well, if you weight more than her, then go ahead. Weight is not a problem. Consider your strength first though. If she weights more than you, she probably knows it and wouldn't ask to sit on your lap in the first place, so don't worry
136406
She has a good friend. You're kind of in an awckward position to help an overweight friend. If you try to help her to get thinner, she might end up resenting you because she'll think you don't like her.\nRemember that being fat is not a body problem, it's an emotional problem. What you can help her the most is in raising her self-esteem while she remains fat. Tell her "it's Ok to be fat". Well, not in those words. Say "don't worry about what people say, people are very judgmental, and they don't understand that women have issues". Tell her "I don't think you hate your body because you're overweight, I think you have had emotions you haven't resolved yet". That sounds like psychobabble but it's pretty close to reality. You can probably find a better way to say it.\nIf you're just wishing she was thinner, and she's bringing you down emotionally, you need to think of yourself first, also. You might get to a point where you can't take it, and that is OK, you can take a break too.
326237
im 30 pounds heavier for my body built, my bf still loves me like you love your gf, but he's a bit harsh and mean when he tells me those things, so good thing ya aint putting her down, i agree with the others, join the gym together and eat healthy, if you buy her a nice excercising outfit, she might be inspired to join the gym. that's what my bf did! he bought me one whole outfit from nike, and now i go to the gym 4 days a week.
698722
Don't tell her you think she's fat.  Tell her you are uncomfortable at your weight and that you want her to exercise with you because you want to spend more time with her.   If  she mentions she has a weight problem then you can say something about working together on it.\n\nThe Cooking Light magazine someone else mentioned is a great idea!!    Good luck!