What shoud I do now, my boyfriend got upset because I did not want to have sex with him last night?
407301
I read some of the advice here and then I thought, "This advice she got is SO BAD... so I will give some real advice."\n\nOkay Girl... if you don't want too, that should be okay.  That is what love is about.  Doesn't matter the reason why.  If you didn't want to that night and said so nicely, but assured him you still care, HE should love you enough to let that be okay.  What are you, his toilet that you have to be there for his deposits?\n\nOkay, that last sentence is a bit carried away.  Now, I am one for waiting until marriage, but listen to WHY!!  Girl, you deserve love and respect, and honour.  A man who believes that you deserve that as well will offer you marriage before he asks you to sleep with him.  He will offer the loyalty and commitment that marriage is SUPPOSED to have.  The fact that your boyfriend just left you makes me terribly sad.  You deserve better... you deserve for your heart to be so full of love that you pour into his life... but your heart is full of love because he has also poured into you.  If you were sick, would he stay by your side or would he only if you were still able to "service" him when sick?  You see what I mean?\n\n    If I could recommend anything, take some time for yourself and look at what your dreams are, even if they are so bashed that you barely remember them.  Then realize that there are dreams that come true, and it is worthwhile to pursue them.  Then look at your boyfriend and decide if he is really what you want, or if you were just settling for a substitute as you thought you couldn't do better.  Also... look in the mirror and instead of criticizing, see deeper and see the woman who is WORTH a GREAT DEAL!!!!!!!!!  That woman in the mirror deserves a chance to get her dreams... and it is up to you to set the boundaries too.  Set your boundaries so that you are respected... don't do it out of malice.  Decide what YOU want in life.. you have a LOT to offer... so decide what you want, and don't settle for less.\n\nOnce you do that, you will know what to do with your boyfriend from there... but give that woman a chance to emerge and really LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!
176691
I presume you dont like to have sex? But you both are in Love? Am I right?\n\nThen you need to see a Shrink (doc). \n\nYou need to know that the guy obviously cannot live with you knowing that there is no sex between you both. So do him a favour and find out why u dont like sex... \n\nIm sure you will find a solution to this and your love life will be more interesting and rewarding...\n\n.:Fishie:.
741821
First, did he tell you he went? If so and youre still upset, then you might wanna explore WHY this bothers you so much. He came home to you, right? If it's something he enjoys, why not let him go? Either way, have a talk with him and let him know your feelings.\n\nIf he didnt tell you he was going (or went - sometimes this stuff happens on a whim), then I feel you on feeling disrespected since it would appear he was doing something shady.\n\nAt any rate, Id have a talk with him...non-accusatory, respectful, etc...dont get him defensive because youll get nowhere...\n\nGood luck :-)
14622
Have you asked what the condoms are for?  If you guys don't use condoms then, HELLO?  But if you do then he might have an excuse in that case tell him to leave them with you.  The staying out all night if you didn't know where he was at and you couldn't get in touch with him then you should come to your own conclusion but I think it' pretty clear. I'm sorry.
411977
why dont u simply ask him ,whats wrong with sex?a lot marrieges came after,relax
813322
Yes, you did the best thing.  You were honest with him about what you wanted in your relationship with him, and I won't give you the unprotected sex speech, and he didn't want to commit to you because he was already seeing someone else (and still having unprotected sex with you), which is why all of your apology attempts didn't matter.  I'm unsure why you were apologizing since you didn't do anything wrong but ask for a monogomous relationship.  You're better off without him and the fact that you wished him well just shows that you're taking the high road.  I highly doubt that this current relationship will last very long, but if nothing else, please protect yourself in the future!
316759
Ask him if it's you, or is there anything you can do to ease his troubled mind.  If he says no, then its best to leave him alone, go out with your girly pals until he gets over it.  trust me, once he's sulking all alone in a dark apartment for hours with his pathetic poor-me bullshit, and starts to imagine you playing 3-D naked twister with your girlfriends, he'll get over that imature I-Me-Mine game real quick!
348624
Have a girls night and make him worry about you, if he just gets pissed, tell him you would have called and told him about it but his phone was off :)
440000
If you feel you're not ready, don't let the feelings of 'loss' cloud the way you actually feel. If you're being pressured to have sex when you're not ready for it, and he's leaving you because he disrespects your choice, he's not ready for someone like you! It might hurt now...but if having sex with you is the ONLY reason he wants to be with you, sorry, dear girl, but there's probably someone out there who will treat you with at least the same respect that you have for yourself.
906598
I think your looking for an excuse to not have sex. J/K Don't let a little laughter spoil a good time. You know your are completely comfortable w/ someone else when you are able to laugh at each other's imperfections and not be offended. Relax I've been laughed at in bed many many times.
852390
Get couples counseling. Perhaps if he heard it from someone else, he'd realize that his neanderthal view of sex is outdated and unfair, and you are miserable because of it.\n\nIf he won't get counseling and you said talking to him doesn't work, then you decide to stay and keep fulfilling your "obligation" or stand up for your rights and feelings, and don't have sex if you don't want it. Maybe if he had to go without for a while, he'd change his attitude a bit...\n\n...or maybe he'd stray or become violent...\n\n...or you can decide you've had enough, that it's not worth the conflict of standing up for yourself in the bedroom, and you can move on...\n\nYou are choosing to keep yourself in an unhappy situation...do what you can to fix it or get out...if you cannot fix it, then choose to resign yourself to your fate, or get out...\n\nThis life is too short (imo) to be unhappy in our jobs or personal lives...we choose to be happy or unhappy...we make our lives what we want them to be...\n\nWhat do you want yours to be? Make it so.
261642
If you have to question having sex with him, then you shouldn't have sex with him.  If you want a meaningful relationship with him, it would be in your best interest to wait.
240683
I'm really sorry but you probably should not have had sex with him - and if its going nowhere now it probably means he was just into the sex.  Take is as a lesson learned and move on!
484081
well by the sounds of it he already has made a massive mistake & lost you . I hope he realizes what he had . On the upside at least he never went behind your back either but he has to learn he can't have his cake & eat it too. Sounds like u are still young. typical to want to sleep with someone else but the thought of u doing it he can't stand . I think move on there are plenty of men out there that will treat u right this guy i hate to say it wo'nt change do'nt let him drag you down find a nice guy & later on down the track u will be wondering what all the fuss was about Good luck with this.
786616
maybe HE wanted you to be part of his sex life. And you turned him down after you got him excited. I would be mad at you, too.
338362
hey sweetie sex won't work believe it or not it's just the opposite however if he gets frustrated and bugs out because of the lack of nookie he was not the guy any way. cudo's to you for standing on your moral principles. my best to you and your relationship
575126
if your sleeping with another guy then your not really in love with your boyfriend, if you really wanted and loved your boyfriend then you wouldn't do anything to mess your relationship up, so I think you should break up with your boyfriend and find one that you couldn't stand to cheat on.