factors militating against the institution of marriage in contemporary islamic times.?
407226
:}\nfair treatment of females\ntemporary marriages\nage of females at the time marriage is legal\nlimited opportunity for education for females
1042019
Aunt Tita has the right answer to the question.\n\nZeus has the right observation on the politics.\n\nI agree that the govt should get out of marriage, just as it should be out of religion and out of reproduction.  The idea that we need the govt to "promote" marriage or family-building is absurd.  Those things have taken care of themselves for the whole history of our species (as evidenced by the fact that we are all here), without any govt involvement for practically all of that time.  (And frankly, if any people are getting married and having children merely in response to government incentives, that can't possibly be good for the health of families.)
1019555
1, 2, and 3 are just ridiculous.  razors??  LOL, whatever.  Men CAN marry 4 women, but they need the first wife's permission and are told it's better to marry just one since men by their very nature have a hard time being fair and just with just one.  4, I have been to islamic countries.  you are sadly misinformed.  My nephews and nieces there have regular schoolbooks, and study the Quran for only an hour a day in their home when an Imam comes to teach them how to read arabic.  5, all of this is against islam.  Whipping is commanded for adulterors only, and that's it.  6, internet is all over the islamic countries too.  internet wasn't even INVENTED in those days, so there can't be any issue with it.  It's also a great educational tool and many of those same people can get an education online.  7, again you are sadly misinformed.  They have everything we have.  My father in law has a toyota corolla with all leather interior and little pillows on each headrest both in front and back.  Not to mention a great AC system.  8, doctors and other people of those fields are used over there, too.  What, do you think they don't have hospitals?  Of course they do, otherwise who else would have cured my daughter of Yellow Fever?  We went into the hospital, and across from where the maternity ward is, there was the children's area.  The doc sat down on stool, examined her, and gave her two injections.  One was an antimalaria and one was an antibiotic.  They have EVERYTHING we have.  You name it, they have it.  They are not so backwards as you would like to believe.  Don't let the medai spoon feed you that garbage.  Get a brain and use it.  My God.
271618
There are very few societies in human history that don't have the concept of marriage.  It's the concept of marrying out of love that's the newest development.
563095
For the vast majority of western people, no.  But, I am sure that there are some families who still practice arranged marriage.  I don't personally know any, though.
1102423
marriage is a suprior relationship far far better then the whole bf and gf system\n\nmay allah guide u all\n\nhttp://www.islamalways.com
784269
I won't get into the sin thing, since I'm a Humanist and that's a religious concept, but it does seem to me that, if one of the reasons societies promote marriage is to promote stability, then it doesn't make sense to discourage same-sex couples from marrying.  Denying gay couples the right to marry is not defending marriage.
805177
The internet has loads of information on forced marriages. All you needed to do was a simple internet search. Here is a small sample of what is available, focusing on Algeria. \n\nhttp://www.westernresistance.com/blog/archives/002305.html\nhttp://www.medusa2000.com/marriage.htm\nhttp://stophonourkillings.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=442\nhttp://www.middle-east-online.com/English/algeria/?id=7177\nhttp://www.globalmarch.org/resourcecentre/world/algeria.pdf\nhttp://www.catwinternational.org/factbook/Algeria.php\nhttp://www.diplomatie.gouv.fr/en/france_159/label-france_2554/label-france-issues_2555/label-france-no.-64_3965/society_3969/no-to-forced-marriages_5373.html\nhttp://www.womensenews.org/article.cfm?aid=2938\nhttp://mondediplo.com/2004/10/12women\nhttp://www.medusa2000.com/sexual.htm\nhttp://www.algeria.com/forums/algeria-en-algerie/13988-ill-get-my-girl-back-algeria-3.html\n\nI suggest in future that you just use a search engine, instead of runing to Yahoo! Answers.
974131
people argue that marriage is a relgious thing, but government calls for a seperation for church and state.\n\nlet them be married and be happy. it is not affecting you.
1112649
i agree that these questions should be addressed to a sheikh directly. however, if you look into the Quran, Allah addresses divorce, and one of the thing that He Az wa Jal Mentions is conditions IF a man hasnt approached his wife yet.\n\nalso, if you look at the ruling of the woman who is on her period, of course a man should not approach his wife during that period.\n\ntechnically, your married once you do kabt-kitab (the Islamic Contract) and you can consumate your marriage any time after that.\n\nwallahu ta'ala alem.\n\nI would also recommend going to IslamQA.com and looking up your question.\n\nhope that helped.\n\nMay Allah subahana wa ta'ala bless you and your wife in this life and the hearafter. ameen!
1164517
I agree with you. We are on a slippery slope of governmental control of the most mundane daily activities if we let the government dictate what is or is not allowed. They government does not have the right to dictate who one can marry, what choices I can make with my body or control my choices!
1141991
1. Lack of commitment and trust.\n\n2. Lack of communication.\n\n3. SELFISHNESS. Marriage is about two people sharing their lives so when one partner decides to pursue selfish personal desires irrespective of where their activities leave the rest of the family, then that's it- it tumbles down.
1153501
I'm assuming that you are getting these comments from older relatives? Our society is currently in flux and it no longer behooves women to marry young like it once did. Women are more and more often to be the ones to put off getting married because many women see marriage at a young age as a trap into domesticality.\n\nI mean, who really wants to have to hold down a job, do the majority of the household chores, do the majority of the child care, and then have to deal with the husband acting like his wife is really his mother? I mean even the most responsible men don't seem to know how to eat a healthy meal (pizza is NOT a food group!), how to scrub a toilet or wash a load of laundry (or how often such tasks need to be done), or how to write a grocery shopping list or a menu for a weeks worth of meals. \n\nI say, you go girl! Marriage is a raw deal for women. Men definately got the better end of the marriage agreement!
1168561
When Prophet married more than 4, it was not yet forbidden. \n\nMOST OF THE PROPHETS WIFE WERE WIDOWED\n\nMarriage to a widow was a curse in Arabia as well in other major parts of the world such as India. In most of these societies a widow was considered more like a pariah or curse for the entire family. By marrying them he was setting a precedent to reverse the taboo of widow marriage. \nSecondly, he was paying back his due to some of the companions who had perished in battles leaving behind widows with children, just as he was also seeking to unify the Arab tribes.\n\nThe Prophet's marriages proved to be one of the means of achieving his mission of unifying Arabs. \n\nA still important factor to consider: The most sexually active phase in anyone’s life is before he reaches the age of fifty. We must remember that in this phase, the Prophet had only one wife, Khadijah, who was fifteen years older than him and a widow twice. The Prophet married her when he was twenty-five and she was forty years. \n\nIt was only after her death and in Madinah, after he had dedicated himself to the task of building a nation, that he married a number of women belonging to different Arab clans, most of them were widows.  Such a function of marriage is inconceivable for us today. It is wrong to judge them by the standards of our modern secular values and ideals. \n\n===================\n\nThe founder of twenty terrestrial empires and of one spiritual empire, that is Muhammed. As regards all standards by which\nhuman greatness may be measured, we may well ask, is there any man greater than he? " [Lamartine, Historie de la Turquie, Paris 1854, Vol. 11 pp. 276-2727]
947332
I'm Indian and Arab. A lot of times, culture does play a big role in marriage, and many people still have arranged marriages. The parents want to find a spouse who will be an asset to the family, and compatible with their child. \n\nCulture and religion tend to play a very large role.\nI don't have issues with marrying anyone outside of our culture, but many people would. Keep the blood, "pure."\nIt's unfortunate, but it does allow the culture to continue as it does.\n\ni was never allowed to date anyway :)
313691
A muslim can go as far as they want if that relationship is marriage :-))\n\nBut seriously outside marriage any kind of fornacation is a sin, and by fornication a mean anything even a lustful look. There is a Hadith that says that it worse for a man to have an axe through his head than even accidently touch who is not his mahram (wife or blood reletive) women.\nFor women (like me) when I'm outside or with non mahram, I must wear hijab (cover myself fully) and I'm not allowed to be alone with a man. etc etc.\n\nWhen I do decide to get married it is not islamic to have a long engagement etc. And I won't be alone with my finace untill after marriage.  Tipically family and friends help find prospective partners, and then arrange a meeting where maybe they leave us 2 in a room, and they wait outside with the door open! And then if you are still not sure it is ok to ask questions by phone etc, before you get married.\n\nBut as you see it is very different from the western version of romance!!
659845
You're right, I feel it isn't justified at all. While this maybe something that pandered to the primitive people of the past, it just doesn't apply to today's modern and ever-changing society.\n\nI will use Christianity as an example. \n\nChristianity preached monogamy. It gave instructions on how to behave in marriage, and how a husband and a wife should behave to each other.\nIf a man decides to go have mistresses on the side or engage in serial polygamy - it's not Christianity's fault either.\n\nThis is Ano's arguement, that Islam allowed men to have up to 4 wives with the instruction that men should not take another wife if they fear they cannot deal justly with all of them. And that if they stray within these limits its "not Islam's fault".\nFirstly, many Islamic scholars have agreed that a man need not take the permission of his wife (some even go further and say that he needn't even inform her of his marriage) to marry another.\nThis leaves the complete power in a man's hands, and there is little that is provided for that, since we all know how many Muslim men don't follow this rigorously.\nSecond, while a Muslim man may take up to 4 wives, there is little that stops or prevents them from the ease of their divorce, which somewhat encourages them to engage in serial polygamy - this time 4 wives at a time (like King F'ahd of Saudi Arabia who married over 300 women to consolidate the tribes in KSA, 4 at a time), especially since for a man - all it takes for him to divorce a woman is 'talaq, talaq, talaq' (triple divorce).\nIn UAE you're even allowed to text these words of divorce to your wife and be legally divorced.\n\nThirdly, \nabout slavery. It's a hotly debated issue, and many Muslims prefer to shun the subject, or dance around the topic without an answer.\nThe point is, yes, a man can take as many concubines (called "slaves") as he wants, as spoils of war. Supposedly, this is because these women, with the men killed in battle or taken as war prisoners, will not be able to support themselves and it is considered better that a Muslim man take her as a slave (or concubine) and have legal intercourse with her.\nHer children will not become slaves, and he can choose to marry her, which she will then be conferred the status of a Muslim woman.\nHowever, imagine if a man goes on several wars and comes back with several "slave women". How is his wives going to deal with that? Just sit back and be happy that he's taking care of them, or feel somewhat cheated because this man is treating them like cattle that he can 'legally' have sexual intercourse with?\nI feel it's not justified at all.\n\nYou see, the point is, polygamy gives men even more power to abuse women and even treat women like trash using divine 'messages'. Now he can even divorce them 4 at a time (not saying he will, but he will have the option to.), and have full rights over them.\nOf course, there is no way a man can treat his wives equally. He will always love one wife more than the other.\n\nThe prophet's favourite wife was Ayesha, his youngest wife.\n\nSo because it is Sunnah (it is recommended) that you follow the ways and deeds of the Prophet, obviously, the interpretation of the Qu'ran's dictum of treating wives equally does not mean in terms of love, or affection.\nIt is MATERIAL. That means, if he buys a handbag for a wife, he must buy the same handbag for the other wives, or give them a gift of equal value.\nHe must divide his nights among them.\n\nHowever, the Prophet himself did not divide his nights among his wives equally, as many hadith (reports of the Prophet's sayings, deeds, etc.) testified that he was in the bed of another wife during the turn of one of his wives.\nSo, dividing nights equally must be optional as well, as the Prophet himself was only human and did not divide them equally (though we can all say he