I am having trouble forgiving my Father for what he did.  Help!?
404792
You just have to accept what happened and forgive him in your head. You'll probably never be able to forgive him in person though.
647160
will forgive him to not act in the way we dont think thats idiot....by repecting for all the things he did and he does for me.....Dear friend...our parents sometimes do somethign what in our opinion will refused or as u said idiot action....u can talk to him or just lt that pass
795048
You get past this by taking the opportunity to FORGIVE him.  Many times, the hardest thing we can do is forgive when we believe someone is so much in the wrong.\n\nAs you grow in your faith, you must always remember that part of you remains human...and vulnerable to temptation.  \n\nHow can you listen?  Heed the word and not the messenger.  God is able to use the most evil to do His will.\n\nHeld to a higher standard?  If they are truly called by God to that position, then they are there by God's will.  Who are we to know if his (T.H.) was a true calling or just his attempt to mask his inner desires/lusts?  \n\nTry to look at this as YOUR opportunity to openly profess your faith in the one true God, and salvation thru His Son, Jesus.  Nobody claims to be perfect when becoming Christian.  Just forgiven.  \n\nThe things that others call us remain the same.  Sometimes the noise is louder than other times.  Sometimes not.  Don't be distracted by them.\n\nPray for him and his family.  And forgive him with all of your heart.
781362
No curses.  I hope that your father will be allowed the freedom to live his life the way HE wants to.  If I ever tried to dictate how my father lives his life, he would tell me to concern myself with my own life.  Perhaps you could try that.
414531
Your dad passed away already, and the bible states that he will be resurrected...so there is hope to see him again.  But now, since you and your sisters are the only family member that need to look for each other, I think that you should forgive her whatever she did with your dad, remember that he is already dead....let him go.  Try to live well between you all for the best of you all...if I ask you: Do you love God, probably you would say:"Yes". That would make a lier, because if you can love God whom you cannot see, how come you don't love your sister, and forgive her, even though you see her....19 Know this, my beloved brothers. Every man must be swift about hearing, slow about speaking, slow about wrath; 20 for man’s wrath does not work out God’s righteousness. 21 Hence put away all filthiness and that superfluous thing, badness, and accept with mildness the implanting of the word which is able to save YOUR souls. \n\n22 However, become doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves with false reasoning. 23 For if anyone is a hearer of the word, and not a doer, this one is like a man looking at his natural face in a mirror. 24 For he looks at himself, and off he goes and immediately forgets what sort of man he is. 25 But he who peers into the perfect law that belongs to freedom and who persists in [it], this [man], because he has become, not a forgetful hearer, but a doer of the work, will be happy in his doing [it]. \n\n26 If any man seems to himself to be a formal worshiper and yet does not bridle his tongue, but goes on deceiving his own heart, this man’s form of worship is futile. 27 The form of worship that is clean and undefiled from the standpoint of our God and Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their tribulation, and to keep oneself without spot from the world. 11 Quit speaking against one another, brothers. He who speaks against a brother or judges his brother speaks against law and judges law. Now if you judge law, you are, not a doer of law, but a judge. 12 One there is that is lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But you, who are you to be judging [your] neighbor?
375844
lalapetal, I would sugest that you talk to someone about this. Is there somekind of counselor you can seek? Some kind of suport groups in your area? I once told that I need to let it go and give it to god. But sometimes it stays with us and find it hard to accept things and forgive others. If you dont want to seek help then please seek a forum that can suport you.. google for some abuse forum, there are some good ones out there. You need to def talk to someone about this so you can begin to heal... this is the first step...
129970
OK lets try and unravel this into its core components.\n\nA police officer [I am assuming] has told you that you cannot approach and/or speak to this person.\n\nYou however, feeling guilty over whatever it is that you have done, feel an overwhelming desire to be punished for your transgression.\n\nThis is a normal reaction for many people as they feel the psychological need for punishment as this provides a sense of "closure" and a shift in guilt.\n\nIn your case you actually want him to do something wrong as well, not just punish you, as this means that he cannot point the finger at you because he has done a horrible thing too.\n\nI know people will say..go to your brother first before coming to the temple...but that does not apply to you in this situation.  You harbour no ill will towards this person!  You cry out to God because your sin is before you.  \n\nGod always hears this cry and you need to focus on your relationship with God first.  This is the path to forgiveness for you, not the friend.  You need to understand that God forgives you.  Then, you may be able to forgive yourself.  Finally you may be able to approach this person and ask forgiveness.\n\nRemember, they may not want to forgive you, and that is their right.  Your peace and forgiveness with God is not dependant upon this persons responses to you, even though you did the wrong thing.\n\nGod may be workingnin that persons life too, and Gods timing is not always ours.  Also, some people just need lots of time to be able to forgive, and just because you may be in a hurry to receive it, does not mean you should hurry them up.\n\nThats why it starts with God for you, so that if this man cannot forgive you, you have peace with God that you did all you could to ask for it....and who knows, in time that might help this man to forgive you anyway.\n\nForgiveness is something you ask for from another because it gives THEM the opportunity to heal from the hurt you have done to them.....\n\nIt is never asked for to make YOU feel better about the pain and guilt that you feel for having caused it.\n\nIn your case, you cant approach this person anyway, so this is a perfect opportunity to seek a counsellor perhaps to give you some support with your feelings and how to deal with them.
834124
The first thing you should know is that like the story - his father accepted him back and not with any old home-coming, but a huge feast.  Don't be afraid.\nRealize that regardless of what you've done, coming to terms with it is really one of the greatest challenges.  If we, as individuals, can realize our mistakes, swallow our pride and do so without being ashamed of who we are - we'll celebrate many home comings.\nWe all leave now and then in different ways.  We should return in the same fearless way we left - but wiser.
819405
My dad used to be an abusive alcohol....It was a very painful childhood growing up with all the verbal and mental abuse.....When I turned 22, he completely changed, became a Christian and quit drinking, cold turkey....It took time to heal our relationship, but now I LOVE MY DAD and he really is the best dad anyone could ever want.....We are very close and has been a lot of healing from the past.....He never really apologized, but with his radical change in behavior, I didn't need an apology because actions speak louder than words.....We never talk about the past, because I have forgiven him and I know he is a different person and I choose to let the past go, I can't change it, but only learn from it.....Just be patient and all things will come together.....Best of luck and what a wonderful gift  you have, the opportunity for healing your relationship with your dad, most people never get that chance....
1136077
He'll either forgive you or he won't.\n\nBut, he has to come to that decision all by himself and there is nothing you or anyone else can do to hurry the process.\n\nBe patient and do your best to act "normal" or you will be constantly reminding him. Which will cause him to take longer to forget about it and move on.\n\nBe patient and good luck. It's up to him, not you.\n\n\n\n\nWe don't need to know what happened. It won't change anything or the process.
975335
There's no "political sin" and nothing to be forgiven. If you 've been saying what you feel to be true, where is the fault? I will never apologize for my opinions or emotions because then I would only be a liar to both myself and the people I've compromised for. If you feel like you're going the wrong direction, just change it. Don't dwell on past actions with regret because ultimately they bring you to the point you want to be at (if you're lucky enough to find that point), and there's really no other way to get there.
60832
it's easy just to say the right thing to do is to apologize, which it is, but it's not that easy for someone with an abusive father like that. this all goes much deeper than any outsider looking in would see. so you can encourage him to say he's sorry, but as long as his Dad's not gonna change it may not do any good for their relationship. But deffinately encourage him to apologize. like you said, you only have one dad, and he could lose him at any time.
642089
Did you ever tell him how deeply you were hurt by it? If not, maybe that's the reason why. You probably kept a lot of pain inside and never confronted or forgave him. Also, I go through this, when you look at your child, you are always reminded of the times, the good and the bad,  you had to go through with their father as they are growing because your child is product of you and her father. I would tell him how you feel, forgive, and let go. God blessed you with a great marriage.
1056491
i think you'll have to wait awhile...come to terms with what happened...you don't have 2 forgive someone right after they hurt you or a loved one deeply. i figure that as long as you're not out to kill them you're ok. remember God doesn't expect you to LOVE this person...he's probably angry at what they did too- and give it some time.
307506
Well, I don't think it has anything to do with you forgiving yourself but that is a part of the process. But the first step is to accept forgiveness from God and then let Him work on your heart. \n\nI need to practice what I preach! Viva Me!
225793
It's hard to forgive because we like to dwell on things that happen in the past. If you would just take the time to see that God gives us hard times in order to learn from them, then I bet it would be much easier to forgive that person. Just remember that the past is in that past and theres nothing that you can do to change that. The future is what matters. You can mold your future by looking at your past. As far as punishing someone for their actions, I would leave that up to God to do. The best thing that you can do is to be nothing but nice and sypathectic towards them. When you do that , the other person tends to feel guilty about what they did, and even if they don't tell you that they are sorry, they will infact, constantly think about what they did to you, and hopefully they will at least, ask God to forgive them for what they did. One last thing; I would pray for that person. I would pray that this person realizes what he/she did, how he/she can make it right, and also if God will forgive that person and have mercy on him. If you do all of this, then God will be happy with you and dissapointed with the other person. If you don't forgive him/her or even punish this person, then God will saddened with you just as much as he will be with this other person. One last thing; try to remember the verse from the Lords Prayer, when someone does something that hurts you : Please forgive us are tresspasses as we forgive those who tresspass against us. I hope that this has helped you and I'll keep you in my prayers.
232839
You are honest enough to realise that you have done something wrong to someone, which itself shows u have taken responsibility of it. You cannot immediately confront him as iam sure he too is just recovering from whatever it is you have done to him. You have to wait, be patient. Once when the time is right, when things are a bit silent, you have to talk to him and get it over with. Meet him alone in person and in the first instance, start apologising  and then u owe him an explanation on why u had to do it. And last, tell him how awful you feel about what u did. And wait for him to react, listen to him, positive or negative...it doesnt matter..as much as you have admitted your mistake, give him a chance to let whats in his mind to come out. You have to take it from there, i guess. If that person has forgiven you, then great..but if he hasnt, and goes on abusing or accusing u and making u feel that you have sent him to hell, well...listen to it and simply walk away..you cannot force him to forgive you...\n\nYou did your  part and i'll bet u will feel a lot relieved. It wont irritate you in ur mind that you didnt clear it up, so well done, you have done ur part! pat urself for being brave!!