when you start to fall in love, how do you keep from getting terrified (see details)?
408000
I think it's great that you're asking this question because it means that you really want to make it work.  So, I'm going to give you a straight answer from my experience.  \n\nIf you think he has more going for him than you do, then you need to increase your self-esteem and put less faith in him and more in yourself.  I'm not saying you shouldn't trust him.  You should definitely trust him, but you also need to get to know him for who he really is, not just who you want to believe he is.  Everybody has faults and no one is perfect.  I don't know either of you, but I know there are things about which you will always disagree.  You both make unintelligent decisions (everybody does) and some of those might not change.  \n\nMake sure you get to know him better, but most of all, get to know yourself better.  If you know what leads you to happiness or to sadness or what frustrates you or what gets you thinking in a crazy way, you'll be a stronger person and not only will that make you more attractive, but it will make you happier in all situations because you'll know how to take care of yourself.  I hope things work out for you however is best.
952877
Think of what you would like and think of what might freak you out, mostly if someone comes on too strong.  Have fun, do girl things, do things that get you in contact with each other, put your arm through hers as you walk down the street as a friendly having a good time gesture but don't let her go.  Holding hands in public might be too much right off.  Keep it subtle and easygoing.  If you enjoy yourself then she should enjoy herself and then maybe you can enjoy each other.  Good luck.
988431
You have said it in the first line of your question here, that this problem seems to be based on your past. You seemed to have been wounded by something that has already happened before. Its best you sit and think. Go back to that part of your past and mentally think as to what you could have done to make things better. I know doing so will be painful but it is something that you must do in order to ease the pain. Continuous suspicions, mistrust issues are not to be looped over such a long period of time, especially when you have beautiful people around you who I am positive are caring and concerned more than you know. There is absolutely nothing to be afraid of and most of all there's nothing more frightening than fear itself. Another question here from my side is why is it that you are afraid to love? I am asking this because we all know that what you give is definitely what you get back in return. If you provide love and affection, it is guaranteed that it will come back to you too. If you have any further questions or need someone to talk to, please don't hesitate to e-mail me. Remember, there are so many wonderful people around and you should give them a chance before you can think of anything else. Before that, please try and do what I've mentioned earlier about looking back and thinking for a moment. Until then, take care. :)
1133710
just chill out and get some kind of life outside of him.... \n\ntrust me if you prfess your "undying love, and how head over heels you are" your just gonna scare him....\n\nget with your friends and dont see him a couple nights a week.... the more availible you make yourself for him, the more desperate and whipped he's gonna have you
210412
Love comes and goes. It's an emotion.\nThe trick is to fall in love with the same person over and over again. It's called commitment.
555785
Stop being scared. You should just tell them. You will feel a lot better getting it off your chest. They might love you too and are scared to say anything as well. Then you both will be missing out. So go for it...You never know.
724488
Here's the thing. When you fall in love with someone, there is no getting rid of them or forgetting them. They will always be there in your head. Now yes you do get over the fact that it hurts eventually, but you never forget them. Love is that special thing that when you share it with someone it essentially is always there. \n\nNow i know that everyone will tell you things like: relax, just get over it, take a bath, read a book, or go to God. More or less you just have to figure it out on your own regardless of what people will say here. Because dealing with heartache, its a natural part of life, its the bad side effect of love. But if i was to offer my best advice, i would say that you should chalk it up to experience. Count it as a learning experience, so every time you start to think about her just think about what you learned from the situation, how it will make you a stronger person, and how it will help you in the future. Love is a big part of everyone's life, and it shouldn't be forgotten, even when its bad. Best of luck in your hard times...
81629
If you have to ask, you're not there yet.  Love can creep up on ya and just kinda take your breath away.  You'll know.  It's an awesome feeling, but at the same time it can be very hard.
434629
Firstly you need to overcome your fears.  Try and find a common interest (if you know each other I am sure you have one) and talk about that.\n\nAnd as for knowing if it's really love... I don't think anyone ever does.  You need to just ride things out.  That's what I've always found.  Best way to learn.
232710
How do you know if you'll be accepted ? Put yourself out there....find out first hand if the person is going to accept you...If you love someone you just do....you cant just make that feeling go away....you might have to let it go if truly they don't share your feelings but why live the rest of your life wondering WHAT IF? If the feeling isn't mutual you'll at least know....and then you can move on. Even if you hold on to those feelins forever. Sometimes we love what we cant have or what is bad for us...The mere fact that its bad or off limits sometimes makes us feel stronger towards the subject. So I say GO FOR IT you might be pleasantly surprised at the outcome;)
62146
Talk to people.  If you're waiting for courage to come you'll be waiting a while.  The way it works is, you just do the scary thing and you're scared the whole time.  Then the next time you do it's not so bad, the time after that less so, until you're not scared anymore.\n\nAlso, having something to talk about helps, so see if you can find people who are into the same things as you so there aren't quite so many awkward pauses in the conversation.
751675
nope never to soon to be in love and never to late. \n as far as your relationship goes if at this point your feeling UN easy about saying it then don't just wait but you certainly say i am really getting to like you more and more that sort of thing but love is wonder full and powerful like a great rapids don't jump in with out looking at the water and finding a good spot to start off even then watch out for rocks and under tows
97905
Don't be afraid to follow your heart. Tell her you love her but explain why, what you love about her and how you intend to love her ( what you have to offer: Remember love is strong b/c its a feeling this is a good enough offer) Also tell her your human, you make mistakes, but learned from them as well. Just tell her above all your following your heart and what it leads to is her.
352595
Don't let it get to you. Don't worry so much about whats going to happen next.\n\nTake things one moment at a time and stop trying to control situations.\n\nLet it be and you'll be happy.
286456
you need to learn more about yourself first, before you can connect up with someone else.  if you are scared, there is a reason.  talk with someone, write your feelings out, see if you can figure out why you are scared.   you are valuable, don't allow yourself to be pressured into anything you don't wish to do.
1065272
Fear of rejection, and given that i'm a person in this position, I can tell you "fear of rejection" is more than just three simple words.\n\nYou'd start thinking how the person will react, how does he/she really feel, what if our friendship is ruined, if those feelings aren't returned, will it spread around? if it does return, will he/she want to start a relationship. What if he/she doesn't but I want? What if we start a relationship and it doesn't last? What if he/she isn't my soulmate................\n\nSo let's just skip all that endless thoughts with no answers and just CONFESS OUR FEELINGS. Let it out! You'll never know what those answers are until those feelings are shared. Love is not love until it is given away!
443565
You have to give yourself permission to trust another person.  There could be something in your past that makes you a little nervous about getting hurt.  It's the chance we take when we fall in love, but it's a gamble and we aren't promised anything, I mean when in life are we promised anything so why should love be different.\n\nChoose your mate wisely, make sure he's committed and respectful, make your intentions clear and as does he.  Don't jump in too quick and don't be too judgmental.\n\nWith joy sometimes comes sorrow but don't deprive yourself of the wonderful feeling of being in love.  What's the expression 'It's better to have love and lost than not love at all".