Anyone out there an Adopted Child?  How does this make you feel?
403097
Im 16. I was adopted when i was 4. My parents didn't tell me that i was adopted until i was 13. (almost 14) I felt abandoned, sad and confused because my biological mother didn't want me. I was depressed for awhile. But my parents explained to me that they loved me and that my biological mother loved me too, she just wanted to give me something better. (she was a druggie and was always out partying...) My parents also explained to me that they chose to take me, and that meant the world to me. They chose me, and they didn't have to. Now, i feel a little better about it. I talked to my biological mother for 3 years before i finally got what i needed out of her, reassurance that giving me up was for the better. So, if you plan on adopting a child, make sure that if you're going to tell them that you don't wait unti lthey're 16 or older (it hurts worse....) and make sure to explain to them that you chose them and that being with you is for the better for them. that's what helped me a lot. And just be there for them. If they want to find they're real parents, i would let them. Because it gives them reassurance and peace.
492466
peace and love to you and yours !! no bashing of anyone here - except unthinking uncaring people who bring children into this world and leave them to their own way because it is an inconvenience to their lifestyle... I'll stop now..before I get really worked up.... thanks to all who adopt !!
525516
Thank you, thank you, thank you.\nThis day makes me feel so happy because, as a friend of mine just told me, it remembers me that being a mother is the best decision i have taken in my life.\n\nterry m... i would like to think that you feel your children close to you from your heart, no matter how far they are. I can understand your feelings, and it scares me a little, i do have only one son my self. Happy mothers day for you too.
911709
Got chatting to a lot of people this afternoon while watching our little nephew play in a footy match, turned out one of them is the son of a woman I went to school with, did that make me feel old, nice to meet new friends and acquaintances though isn't it.
564349
I was an only child to a single mother but I feel like I was raised more by my grandparents.  I have many memories fishing, playing catch, and drawing with my grandpa and baking, cleaning, and playing with my grandma.  Sometimes I feel like my mom's my sister because when I do something wrong it's my grandparents' reaction of disappoint that I hate the most but yet when I do something great, I love the fact that I'm making them proud.\n\nSince they're younger than most of my friends' grandparents, I always feel lucky that they're still here and I hate to think of them ever dying.  They really mean the world to me and I love them a lot. :-)
439092
Yes! I have an adopted daughter and I have twin girls. I love all the same but there is a difference in the closeness I think because I gave birth to the twins
247504
The evening when I held my just-born daughter in my hand. Millions of thoughts crossed my mind, right from Genes to becoming a grandfather one day.\n\nThat evening humbled me, made me forget my anger towards my parents, all the animosity I had with some friends. To that extent it affected me, my mom said with tears, "Im seeing a different son now, this time its for good.."\n\nIn short that day changed me from a "Boy" to a "Man"...\n\n.:Fishie:.
284942
no, I'm not adopted, but my heart goes out to those who were and are unable to locate their biological parents.
882645
this really hurts me i'm adopted \n\njk
937034
Right in the middle of it right now after 18 years, three kids (all girls). It is the worse think I have ever had to endure emotionally. I keep asking myself through it all; am I doing the right thing, and the answer is yes. My wife told me to step up and be a man, so I did. I could type forever, would probably cry after a few more sentences. It really boils down to:\n\n1) You have a right to be happy on this limited time on this earth.\n\n2) How can you be the Best parent for your children.\n\n\n\nI want to show them someday what being in a normal, healthy, happy relationship is all about. That way, the might actually have a chance of finding one on their own someday. I want to love and be loved the way that feels real to me. I want to enjoy life with my kids and friends and not feel that I am never good enough for her. I hope she kind find happiness on this earth because it was not with me.\n\nGood luck my friend,\n\nToxic
1099950
Its like no pain you have ever felt in this world,however when they lay your baby in your arms the pain diappears and you will feel a love like you have never felt before!Good luck from a mother of 2.
390220
I agree. I am a step-mother and also an adoptive mother. My baby is only 10 months old but MANY times already I have had someone introduce my family in this manner.......I'd like you to meet Samantha and Tom....and this is Tom's son Daniel and their adopted daughter Anna. \nEverytime this happens I have gone back and asked the person why they chose to introduce us this way.... EVERY one has said Daniel was introduced as Tom's son "because he is Tom's from another marriage and I didn't want to give the impression that you and Tom were his parents" OK I say fair enough... What about Anna being adopted. Why did you mention that? ALL I'VE EVER GOTTEN IS A BLANK STARE , NO REPLY !! Don't guess I'll ever know WHY people do that.
259884
When my daughter wakes up and starts playing with her toys, gets her mother to run behind her to make her eat. Sleeps peacefully on her father's shoulders...\n\nWish I was a kid like her with no worries and no deadlines <sigh>\n\nBut then I feel sad that within a year or two she will start the tiring journey called Study-Work-Pay life......\n\nWish we remained as Cave-men... <sigh> \n\n.:Fishie:.
529486
My daughter and son are both adopted (daughter's parents still living, son's father still living) so I understand what you are going through.  What seemed to work was explaining to our kids that you can love lots of people lots of different ways.  There's Bio-Dad and Mom love, and Adopto-Dad and Mom love, and Big Sister love and Little Brother love, and kitty-cat love, and puppy-dog love.  And, just because they played differently with the kitty-cat didn't mean they didn't love the puppy dog,and vice versa.  They loved both of them, but loved them diffrently, and that was OK.   Using the dog and the cat as examples was more expressive to them and helped them grasp the concept of it being OK to love different things differently and not feeling guilty about where (and to what/whom) their attention was focused.  What you do need to be careful about is any jealousy your ex-husband undoubtedly has, because any subliminal expression of this could add to your son's guilt of loving a new dad. It would also help if you could possibly get your ex to explain that it is OK to love his new daddy.  I think one of the things that also helped both the kids through that was they were both in the same boat so they did have each other as support mechanisms.  Perhaps there is a support group or other parents and children who are going through similar adjustments that you can connect with, as it may help your son to know he is not alone and other kids are going through the same thing he is.    Good luck...I'm glad you and your son found a good man.
365769
Sounds like abuse to me, how do you feel?
121031
Sometimes it makes me wonder who the child really is.  My mother has always been like the 5-year old that will throw a fit until she gets her way...while my dad is looking like her like she is a total idiot.  I had chosen to "side" (for lack of a better term) with my dad, while my mother has always puzzled me...on MANY levels.  Maybe her and I are too much alike?  Or we are just too different...in either case, she is the one that makes me feel torn.
942761
I am sorry,  my grandmother has lost her will to live after my father died three years ago, I do not believe you will ever get over it, I think you may be able to one day accept your child died,  but you will always grieve and feel your loss, I am not sure the goal is too get over it, I was devastated when my father died and I know this cannot compare honestly if my children died, I would probably semi lose my mind at least temporarily. and I know I would become a humanitarian worker on the international scene for human rights watch or red cross, in the thick of things. and I would have a very nomadic lifestyle, however I still  feel the hole that was ripped open in my soul the day my father died, I do not believe it will ever go away, church made me feel worse. the funeral was horrible .I told the priest he was full of it ,and so was his religion ,which offered no comfort .and I informed him  that my father detested religion,I can relate to not wanting to hear the empty god comments. what surprisingly helped me , was a support group for grief victims ,people who had the same or similar experiences .I would have never  joined a group like this, but it was a service offered ,because I donated his organs.and amazingly just the pamphlets generated from the group touched me and helped ease my grief, I know it sounds like it will do no good, but It is truly worth a try, for you to get in touch with other parents who lost their children, I know I saw a persons 360 page on yahoo ,the mans child died and the support from the online community was amazing .I am not sure this will help you as much as a real group ,but not feeling alone in your anger is crucial to feeling better, it is most difficult to hold on to yourself or soul ,if you believe in that, when you are filled with misery ,it is so much harder to love yourself,life, or anything than it is to hate .and making that human connection with others that can truly understand you rather than dismissively wish you well or try to say something they think you want to hear, is the first step in regaining the feeling of control and a new perspective , I also encourage you to visit my 360 page and dont read it ,cause I am bad and while I try to remain positive, I do tend to gravitate to the darkside at times, but go to my friends list  find Skyes avatar click on it and visit skyes page, this beautiful woman is a well of positivity, and spiritual well being .and just reading her blogs make me feel better and I am sure they can touch your heart as well