where can i find info on the negative effects of nepotism in the workplace? (Family not romantic)?
400637
This is just one person's opinion but might help you out.\n\nhttp://www.drizzle.com/~lostboy/TheLine/Nepotism.html
66912
It all depends on your boss.  does he know that he is ineffectual?  If so, you can feed him ideas.  Use social engineering to help him on his way.  Having no backbone is a common trait in state jobs.  No one dares make any waves!!!  If they are kind to you, dont force them to be the wave maker.  You don't want them to stress about job security.  Read dilbert cartoons religiously.  Pay tithe to Scott Adams, for the ideas expressed by his cartoons will only help you on your journey.
852415
Touching your back/shoulders and stroking your neck? Making perverse comments? Sweetie, this is called sexual harrassment. As for why they act this way, basically, they're idiots. Don't write them off as just "goofy." There is no excuse for their behavior. One guy went on a date with you and then told everyone? Is he still in high school? They think it's fun to embarrass you. They way immature men like this think, it wouldn't surprise me if they have some sort of bet going as to who can get you to give up your choice to wait until marriage first. The first thing you need to do is not date any of them. That's just a good policy wherever you may work in your life. If it ends badly, you still have to see that person every day and it can cause a lot of problems. Second, when they say inappropriate things to you or touch you or make you feel uncomfortable in any way, you need to tell them they're behaving inappropriately and ask them to please stop. If they don't, or they just think that's part of the game, you need to go to your supervisor and ask him/her to intervene. Just know that if the boss does intervene, this may make for a hostile work environment because then you'll be the girl who "can't take a joke." Sad, but it happens. Conversely, the boss may think you're overreacting and not do anything. At this point, you'll have to make a decision: file a complaint with the EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission) and let them handle it, again possibly making for a hostile work environment; quit and find another job with mature, professional coworkers; do both. Unfortunately, there is no easy solution to this. If it were just one or two guys behaving this way, it might be easier because they'd be the minority. But if all the guys you work with do it, they'll be more apt to stick together and form a united front against you, saying that you're exaggerating or even making stuff up to get them into trouble. If there are any other women who work there, talk to them and see if they're having similar experiences. If so, it will corroborate your claims and give you more credence. I'm sorry to sound so cynical and/or pessimistic, but this is an all too common situation for many women in the workplace. We've all read and heard about things like this. There's even a movie based on a true story about the first lawsuit against a company for condoning sexual harassment called "North Country" with Charlize Theron. It's a disturbing, sad movie, but it shows what some women have had to go through just to earn a living. Finally, don't let yourself be intimidated. Stick to your values, know that you don't deserve to be treated this way and you don't have to put up with it. No one has the right to put their hands on you without your permission. Be strong and stick up for yourself, and someday, if you have children, you can pass that strength on to your daughter or teach your son to have the proper respect for women. I wish you the best of luck.
954832
1. Being stuck indoors all day and seeing your family less that you would like to. \n2. Dealing with narcissists who believe the world centers around them.\n3. Being forced to care about things you wouldn't normally care about in your leisure.\n4. Going to meetings that never start on time, always end late, and usually accomplish nothing.\n5. The lack of a linear relationship of hard work to compensation. Typically takes a long time to rise up in an office.\n\nNeed I go on?
174639
You can't really do much except let it roll off your back.  She's family and she'll get treated differently probably until she screws up.  As unfair as that is.  You can't say much because that'll make you the bad guy.  If it's really bothering you, you should look for another job.
605614
Unless the two of you are mature, it's not a good idea. You leave yourself open if you are the employee. If it doesn't work you will start to question that person for every decision he/she makes regarding you. He/she is picking on me. They are mad because it didn't work out between us. There are so many things that can come in between you 2. The pro's is that if it does work the superior can help you grow as a professional and as a person. It's tough,and it depends on the 2 people.
227695
I have found that working for family always breeds contempt, due to the familiarity issue.\nMaybe finding employment with another company would solve your problem?  You will always be sensitive to any critique you get from your family, but from another person, you take it and make the change, as you should \nGood luck!
830672
I think we have all been there.\n\nI have a co-worker that just cannot accept responsibility when she screws up.  It's maddening.\n\nSo.....I went onto MSN and found an article about working with difficult people, it described her to a "T" and I typed up a label and mailed it to her.\n\nShe was furious but it brought the issue into the open as she was trying to find out who did it and therefore we were able to discuss WHY someone would do that.  We also made her "put the shoe on the other foot" and think of how she would feel if she had to work with someone that treated her co-workers the way that she did.\n\nShe's still difficult and a witch most of the time but at least she thinks about her actions a little more.\n\nGood luck, there's one at every workplace.
640596
Not mine, but a friend had a horrible boss who made her type out all the letters telling some other employee's they were being made redundant. At 5 minutes before home time he came into the office and said to her 'oh by the way, you need to add your name to that list bcz we're getting rid of you too'...
1035689
Good luck on your search!\n\nOne day at work, one of the guy's daughters had a "go to work with a parent" day. I had to greet her somehow so I said, "Feel free to roam about the compound. Just stay away from the guards and do your time."
164018
Sadly, yes. I work with children and adults and have begun even hating the families I work with - I need to get out of here. Heck, I should be working now, but am choosing to do this to make my job more barable.
492454
I work in a small office as well sounds to me that she doesn't look at the possitve side of things negativity and whining can spread like wildfire. Just say oh that is too bad and say something cheery. All problems should be unloaded at the front door. Work is work and to perform up to your best ability you have to do that and pick up the problems again at the end of the day. Don't ask how are you just say hi move the convo to t.v or a joke you heard. Isn't a pretty day so forth good luck.
730771
Negativity breeds negativity. If you're negative around my workplace you are ignored and basically shunned.
136435
Oh my gosh, did you work at the same place I did?  Your story sounded exactly like the situation I had.  Management and supervisory positions had changed at my work and from then on, the nightmare began.  The witch who rose to power was a narcissitic, egotistical backstabber who made it so unbearable for everyone. She continuously found it amusing to berate, belittle and degrade each and every employee in the company by telling us that we were underworked and so grossly over-paid (we all made more $$$$ than her). Someone who is in the psychology field said that this supervisor's had low self-esteem issues (she weighs close to 300 lbs.)and it is satisfying to her to put others down in order to feel better about herself.  She can't control her weight so she tried to control others.  Unfortunately, confronting this supervisor only compounded to the problem, as she could not take constructive criticism from ANY employee...and talking to the owner of the company proved to be useless, as he always avoided any type of problem or confrontation issue.  Since I did not have an advocate or anyone I could really turn to, the stress of going to work every day was taking it's toll on my health.  For peace of mind and sanity, I gave them my two weeks notice but did not burn my bridges upon my resignation. It is a good idea to have something lined up to go to, especially if you need the income and medical benefits.  You really don't want to be at the mercy of your current employer when it comes to recommendations or verifications.  Good luck.....
375123
Without further details, perhaps The National Labor relations Board would be a starting point:\nhttp://www.nlrb.gov/nlrb/home/default.asp
683935
There is a book I bought a long time ago called "Coping with Difficult People" which is like dealing with difficult people. You can buy it at any bookstore under the self-improvement section. Also, talk with your boss and maybe he can resolve your problems you may have with a co-worker. Don't worry, we've all been there. I sympathize with you. However, just a suggestion, you may not want to use that kind of language on Yahoo Answers.
314540
Was raised in a house like that.  Believe me, I understand. I used to go to my room just to shut them out.  As far as the workplace, it's hard because you actually want to get along.  If we don't participate, people will soon learn that we are not going to fan their fires and turn away from us.  If they are face-to-face, I just have a blank stare for a short time and that reflects to them their words, not my reactions.