confused 16 yr old girl... abuse or no?
397561
just tell him that it annoys you when he does it. if he doesn't stop then you've got to re-think some stuff. if he respects the whole you then he will respect your request to stop hiting you even if it's a way of flirting for him.
1073242
hey steffy,\n\nThe part that jumps out at me are the words abusive and destructive!  I really hope good things happen to you! I mean it!\n\nIf the relationship was that way, then it was also that way for your child....  even if he/she wasn't around to witness it.  Kids pick up on our emotions and feelings...  I'm no expert, but think long and hard before you put yourself and your child back into harms way!\n\nKeep your head high and demand respect!
509992
Do you just want to be dominated or would you also like to be abused? Abuse should not be too difficult to find, if you want abuse, start seeing a girl, be affable enough that she invites you over to her house for dinner or to watch a movie...everytime she leaves the room start snooping, or pee in her flower pot, or start laughing at one of her family pictures and say they look like a group of real turds. Ask her what country her family is from and if she thinks it might be possible that her parents are brother and sister. It won't be long before you will be getting abused. When she asks you to leave just say, "So you feel that way huh, I guess you just don't have any sense of humor? How about a little quickie before I hit the road, babe?" If she refuses (and she probably will unless she is some kind of nut too), then ask her if she will lend you some gas money! If she says no, just say then can I borrow your ATM Card, when you start talking about her money, some women can get violent, one thing for certain, you will soon be completely dominated and thoroughly abused too!  LOL! Soon you will be getting her to call others in to abuse you too!  This will work, YOU CAN ALWAYS FIND A WOMAN TO ABUSE YOU!\nDon't be ridiculous!\nruthie~
64358
Having come to that realization is causing her a lot of emotional pain and if she is not angry now, she may feel that at some time in the future. She needs to address this  with a counselor so she can sort out her feelings. She may be blaming herself which a lot of abuse victims do, until she comes to the realization that it was not her fault. She needs to come to the realization that she did nothing to cause the abuse and also to place the blame where it belongs and that is on the person who did this. Whoever this person is, they violated her trust as well. She may need another person to tell her it was not her fault and I am not suggesting that you be the person to do that. I can't even say the counselor will tell her that because some counselors might but others let the person try to come to conclusions on their own. Each counselor has their own   method to help someone deal with problems. If she doesn't want to tell you the details then just don't ask. I would not even bring up the subject unless she wants to talk about it. I was never sexually abused but I know someone who was and these are all the feelings they had to deal with. The wall between you is probably a defense mechanism and it might be because she now has trust issues which are not your fault. The wall may come down with time but I can't really say for sure that it will. Sorry to hear that this has happened to her and that it has impacted your relationship.\nP.S. You obviously are deeply concerned and care for her and I hope she will come to realize that. She may just need some space right now while she works this out. Don't rule out a futre relationship with her but be extra kind, gentle and have patience with her while she sorts it all out.
355002
That's a tough one.  She's 13, so there's no way of saying you were doing something else that she'd believe.  You might have to bring her to some kind of family counseling place so she can let it all out.\n\nIn the meantime, please make sure your door is locked.\nHope your daughter gets over it soon.
298968
I never assume abuse , but I dont want to give someone the wrong advice and send them into a bad situation, especially if there are children involved\n\nI think abuse can be physical or emotional and either sided , the girl can be the abuser, \n\nhitting, pushing, slapping, touching in anger\nname calling , putting down all the time, hurting ones feelings on purpose, trying to control the other person. telling them where they can go , who they can be friends with. there are so many kinds of abuse
449523
Okay my answer isn't pretty have you consider sexual abuse?\nhere are some signs.Some signs of sexual abuse.\nShe amy feel that that part of her body is bad and dirty.\n you should consult a professional before approaching her to find out if this could be the case if they believe it is possible then learn how to approach her in the healthiest way.This is your child keep seeking answers..\nGL\nSome signs of sexual abuse:\nInappropriate interest in or knowledge of sexual acts \nSeductiveness \nAvoidance of things related to sexuality, or rejection of own genitals or bodies \nNightmares and bed wetting \nDrastic changes in appetite \nOvercompliance or excessive aggression \nFear of a particular person or family member \nWithdrawal, secretiveness, or depression \nSuicidal behavior \nEating disorders \nSelf-injury \nSometimes there are no obvious physical signs of sexual abuse, and a physician must examine the child to confirm the abuse.\n\nMother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible.  ~Marion C. Garretty
683397
If this is true, I hope she dumps your sorry butt!  A pet is like a family member to many people.  The fact that you did something so callous and cruel shows me that you have the capacity to become an abuser.  She needs to drop you and fast.
107562
It's the same as everywhere; you or your b/f hurt her, you go to jail unless it's self defense and you'd better be able to prove it. I'm a former police officer and if you attacked her, I would arrest you. What you need to do is to talk to the girl's parents. She sounds obsessive and that can be dangerous. You need to document every offense, possibly video tape her doing it or recording her with a hidden tape recorder, which, in Texas, you can legally do as long as one party in the conversation is aware that it's being taped, i.e. you or your boyfriend talking to her. If she shows up at your home, call the police. If her parents refuse to put a stop to it, go to the school principal if you are all in the same school and if need be, the police but do not lay a hand on her unless she attacks you. Where do you think sympathy might lie in a court of law? With you and your b/f who are older, or what they would consider a child misbehaving? Right or wrong, sympathy will be on her side because of her age. You both have to be the mature ones in this case. Don't try to solve it on your own. Do tell her when you speak to her that you are going to call the police or go to her parents and if that doesn't work, do as I instructed. It's the safesty way for anyone. There is no excuse for violence unless you are protecting yourself or someone else from a physical threat. Good luck.
777774
OMg are you serious ? is that not child abuse or what ? I cannot imagine a 6 yr old thinking that way or even being told that ,that is okay to think that way. Yes this is most definately a wake up call . they breed their children to hate people. I guess this is true. if it is it is awfull. good luck to you and god bless.
900129
How is she abusing you? And you need to tell someone. Tell your school principal or call the police. Tell someone.
557483
I am sorry to hear all these stories abt child abuse. Nicky, if you think you need someone to talk to, speak to a professional. They will be able to help you sort things out with yourself. The impt thing to do is to make peace with yourself...Understand that you are different from your mum, and that no matter what, you will be stronger than her too. Whatever reasons she had that cause her to abuse you like that will not be happening to you again...so let go, and trust in the Lord that He will bring you peace and happiness. God Bless
203461
I am guessing that you are a 7th grade teacher.  And, I would further venture that you are fairly new in your profession.  Thirteen year old girls are quite prone to their emotions, things can seem rather drastic to them.  Is there a chance that what she is telling you is true? Definitely.  Not all abused/neglected kids are unkempt and come from families would fit a particular stereotype.  That is HER reality right now.  Next time you see her, it could be different.  Re read what you wrote in the further details:  "I do not know how to deal with this situation...."  Stay within your scope.  Do what you do best, teach.  Hand the emotional issues off to the people who are trained in these issues.  \n\nRefer her to a Guidance Counselor AND continue to listen.  Discuss any new information she gives you with her Counselor.  I think it may be wise for YOU to ask the Guidance Counselor how you might stay more objective when these sort of things are brought to your attention.
411672
wow. you're right. she is psycho. she's going to have lots of problems later in later if she can't handle and control herself.....hurt herself???If i were you, I'd worry about her hurting YOU FIRST!!!....keep your parents appraised of what's going on... try to avoid contact with her, if possible...hopefully, with time, she will move on.....hopefully, she'll move on to a THERAPIST REAL FAST!!
1076996
That's just wrong.  How would you feel if you knew some 40 yr. old was messing with your 19 yr. old daughter.  I would have a fit and be ready to kick some ass.  That girl is just a kid.  She hasn't reached true maturity in any way, shape, or form.  Leave the kid alone and go for a real woman.  She can never do anything for you as young as she is.  Don't ruin her life and make her a bitter young woman already.  End it as peacefully as possible so she can be with boys, yes boys, her own age.
434977
Why would it be a shock? Did you not realize something was wrong. I am sure her parents might have something to do with this so talk with her and let her know how you feel..K
512662
I dont understand what you mean specifically by "she told me she was ganan bleed?" But, it sounds like cutting behavior? Am I right? If so, I would advise you to speak to her parents immediately. She needs mental health counseling, and if her wounds are serious, medical treatment.