my husband shot himself 2 wks ago and now is in denial..we live 800 miles apart he cant live w/o me now what?
402952
send him pics of different things you are sticking in yourself. veggies work well.
256119
Prepare your house for the worst.  Contact a lawyer, get prepared legally, finacially (start saving), and continue to establish contact with your husband.  Give him every opportunity to talk, write or communicate with you.  Sometimes national borders slow written communication, but if he has web access there really is no reason not to stay in touch.\n\nIf all efforts at communication fail, go to see him in person, you can buy the ticket, get a passport and go there, and drop by.  And if you have prepared for the worst, you will be in good shape to get your life together again should you decide to terminate the marraige.\n\nIn summation, you should save money, research lawyers, and continue to establish contact with him.  If no contact can be established, then go to him, not as a confrontation, but as a surprise, his reaction will tell you everything you need to know, and what you should do.
242490
I know what you are going through, and I completely understand... missing your husband so much that it physically hurts.  It isn't the same seeing them on web-cam, or chatting in the Internet. Sometimes it helps to have a good cry (I always feel better after having a good cry), take a good long look at your kids, spend allot of time with them, watch them sleep for a bit, and hold them close... It will help.  Tomorrow is another day. Like the other posts said, start a journal, put all your feelings down on paper. Go see your parents or friends, get out of the house! Remember, take things one day at a time, and put your trust in god.  He will be there for you, he will shelter you, and he will take away the pain. I know this isn't really helping much but you will pull through this. I will pray for you tonight (and your hubby & kids.) Virtual Hugs (wish I was there to give you one in person) God Bless
467785
get your son back call the police firstly. Secondly, your husband needs a clip over the ears how selfish he is to put you under so much pressure. Can't he see he is killing you. Go to counselling and get him to AA. \n\nStand up for your rights and do what you know is best. If he refuses kick him out!
238939
It happened to me. My husband and my sister no less.  It ruined my marriage, even after 28 years I haven't forgiven him.  He ended up with a terminal illness- Multiple Sclerosis for 15 years. He passed away in 2004. I felt like I had to stay and help him.  His actions affected my relationship with my older son and my sister...not that she was worth a second chance. But, I did try.  My mother, father, and baby sister didn't talk to me for 15 years- yea, like it was my fault. My brother and I remained estranged until he passed away. All I did was stay with the guy.  Big mistake! My younger son is not really part of the family every one shuns him because he looks like my husband. My sister's daughter ended up being an outcast and tried to commit suicide twice. What should you do?  Move on...make a life for yourself, find someone that respects you and loves you for who you are now... don't wait it will only hurt you! I am 53 back in college and making a life for myself for the first time. I have never been happier. I plan on traveling and staying alive! With as much enthusiasum as possible..If you need to have someone beside you I am sure that there will be that certain someone around the corner.  For myself, I just love being myself. One day maybe I'll meet someone but, for now my happiness and peace of mind it what counts to me.
623005
Don't make any moves like contacting a Dr. unless things get out of hand. This could be taken as a type of betrayal. I served over there and thing changed a lot for me when I came back to the US. \n\nHe is your husband and you have an obligation to help him through this, but not if it gets so bad that you are living in fear. \n\nThe best thing he could do is to talk to other Vets. Any American Veteran from any war. Grandpa, Uncle, Brother, this helped me because it allowed me to understand that every Vet has to sort of relearn what it is like to be in society.\n\nPlease go to militaryonesource.com this was created for PTSD and family. Also you can call them 24/7 at 1-800-342-9647 they will know exactly what to do to help, guaranteed\n\nI am just looking at it now and there is a button on the front page that says Resources for military spouses.
888960
Dear Hayley,\n\nCALL NOW:\nNational suicide crisis hotline\n1.800.SUICIDE (784-2433)\n\nTell them about your friend. They may be able to get a phone trace if he actually threatened to commit suicide ever. They can give you better advice than anyone untrained also. Good Luck, we'll be praying for you both.\n\nCalico.Kitty
965954
Umm, why is this guy who is supposed to love you so much getting listening to what other people say about you and taking his relationship cues from that advice?  He shouldn't be listening to anyone else but himself.  Moreover, he's being unreasonable with this whole move thing, but that's characteristic of men--they can be selfish.  Still, if you have explained to him that it's difficult for you and he still doesn't get it, then stop explaining.  Nothing is served by you constantly having the same discussion/argument with him about you two living together and you moving to the USA.  Moreover, if what you're doing to comfort him about his grandmother isn't working, then stop.  My experience has been that it's hard to comfort men when a close relative, friend, etc. passes away.  My ex-husband's father died after we had been married for one year and I had no idea how to comfort him except to remind him of what our religion says about death.  Other than that, the only people who could comfort him properly were other family members (i.e. siblings) because they were going through the same thing.  Just be there for him, call him to check on him, make sure he's not slipping into depression and if you can, pay a personal visit to him just to reiterate that you care and love him and will be there for him in his time of need.
441657
He was right to be hurt. Right to worry and be worried sick. He was right to be angry because you completely blew off his fears and hell he would go through if you went missing for so long without checking in. However...he DID NOT have a right to hit you. This isn't the 1940's when women thought they have physical abuse coming for something they did. You need to understand that no physical violence is "acceptable" no matter how bad you screwed up. MY soon to be ex wife cheated on me with a man and then a woman while I was in Iraq. I didn't touch her. I may not have respected her as my "wife" but she's still the mother of my children. Give him some time to think this through. Be there at the house like you normally are. Do all the things you usually do like dinner, the kids....\nShow him you want this life with him. It'll help him see what he has and what he could lose unless he realizes what you mean to him. When he's calmed down he'll want to know more. He'll ask again to see if the story changes. Keep to the truth no matter how it might look. He needs to understand you will not put up with physical abuse ever again. Good luck and I hope you two can fix this.  Compared to the reasons for my divorce, yours are easy to repair with love, faith, trust and friendship.
214135
this is to serious to wait around for answers from us. is this a friend or you that your talking about. whoever it may be, they need to know how devastating it is for the people left behind. This is something u can't take back. your family and friends will never be the same. life is too short as it is to end it so soon. you need to stop thinking about the things that are going on right now and try to think ahead. whatever it is thats troubling you will be better in time, one way or another. pray to God to give you the strength to live through this, He will show you a way. Suicide is the worst way to die, because it is something that can be prevented so easily, and you have to wonder where you will be heading in the afterlife after making a decision like that. If this is a friend definately call 911, even if u dont think he is serious, u cant be too careful. i know all this from having lost my friend years ago. something that didn't have to happen if someone would have just seen the warning sighns or just took him serious. Please dont let yourself or your friend make the biggest mistakes of your lives. good luck, i will be praying for you.
640624
You need to leave, NOW!  He is going to blow at one point and if he doesn't kill you, or someone else, he is going to hurt you bad!  If he has ever hit you, he will again...and harder!  He is already verbally abusing you, mental abuse, and is probably making you feel worse and worse about yourself.  You need to get out before he totally ruins you.  You CANNOT change him.  He has to make that choice himself and seek the help.  You have done all you can do and he has refused counseling.  Tell him that if you are ever to come back, he will need to go to anger management and/or counseling.  You can only blame your childhood for so long until you have to take responsibility...it is time he takes responsibility for his own actions.  Good luck, and please get out before it is too late.  Three women in America are killed each day by their partners, don't be one of them!
851268
Okay, you asked how his wife died and then you asked why she committed suicide... you answered part of your own question.  Are you asking how she did it?  She used a gun and she had been depressed for years and one day just stopped fighting it.  Truly tragic.
600692
Oh Lotte, you will not survive, you will THRIVE, sistah!!\n\nrelease your husband , release your guilt, get to know yourself again and embrace your future and all it's possibilities!!\n\nit will take time, some days will still be sad, but you'll be happy again before you know it.\n\ni am living the same thing right now, i know it sucks. just keep walking...
110334
It sounds like he just wants attention. I've been to the suicide place before too, and all I wanted was to be loved and cared for. A lot of the time when people talk about suicide they merely want attention. But you really can't pay attention to what they're like when you're around them. You have to see what they're like when they're alone because most people will act like normal people while they're out and go home and kill themselves. There are a few things you could do. Tell his parents, his friends, the police, take him to church, a doctor, on top of all that just be there for him.
441772
Dear One, Your pain must be almost unbearable at times.I am so sorry for your losses.God does not promise a life with out pain here on earth, he does promise his grace and his mercy, and peace.He does promise that someday all this will be made known to us, which for some as yourself is so hard to understand as you go through this. He has never stopped loving you, he has never left you, he has never stopped loving your wife...he was with her holding her hand as he took her home. Life is hard, painfull and confusing, please hold on to God he is Loving so so much,  he is waiting for you so he can take your pain. Call on him...... you are in my prayers...
743490
If your uncle had given them to him and the cause of death was overdose, then he could have been held responsible, but since your dad shot himself, then only your dad is responsible.  Our family has been through 2 suicides, both with firearms.  It's so HARD.   Whether or not the death certificate states suicide, you will still know in your heart that was what happened.  Only you and your family know the truth, whether or not he was deeply depressed.  If he was, even with all the best help in the world, sometimes people are so lost deep inside they can never find their way back.  You love them so much and YOU can see they have so much to live for, but they can't and nothing you do can make them see.  Please, all of you go for counseling, you will need it and I promise you it will do a world of good for you all.   I am sure your uncle is eaten up with guilt as well.  He made a bad judgment and he is paying for that too.  I wish you some peace, we have been there and my prayers will be with you.  I see a lot of people are saying your dad was selfish.  I don't think he meant to be.  Some people just don't have the strength to keep fighting the demons that assail them each and every day.  Those of us who are mentally well don't understand that, not until you have been there with someone and see a portion of what they go through every day.
381186
If my husband doesn't come home for a week without a valid reason then he is a dead man. But I will calmly accept him maybe he was stuck in an elevator or had an accident and couldn't call or could be in a coma in a hospital somewhere. You should be worried really before you jump to conclusion, know the reason first.