How do I moveon, coming from a 3yr relationship?
399402
One Day At A Time, One Step at a Time.  just start living again, and keep busy and get out there and get involved in the community make new friends, and before you know it the memories that are floating around in your head, will be gone because with time, you will have made new ones.
168450
Why there is so much anger around, why people cannot offer a level headed suggestion without getting reactionary?\n\nLady, take a step back. Relax, review the situation -thoroughly and honestly. What has gone missing from this relationship that is causing this? Obviously you are not the only one who is missing something after such a long time.\n\nYou never mentioned whether you were married, have children, have other common obligations.\n\nThis is all needed if you think this 20 years of relationship is worth slavaging, or you could go ahead like the rest of the advisors -sue him, get your money and house and custody and then remain miserable for the rest of your life. \n\nI am sure that the impact this relationship has had will leave scars unhealed for the rest of your life.\n\nDo not be hasty about it, just do what you think is right for the relationship and the dependants if there are any.
692936
This is a seemingly growing problem. Years ago people were together more. Now it seems we barely get time to say hi and bye. Life has changed the dynamics of relationships these days. However, it doesn't mean it's impossible to reconnect on an intimate level with your hubby.\n    You asked can you fall out of love with your hubby after 5 years? And the answer is a simple, Yes. Can you also reconnect and fall back in love? Again a simple YES! \n  The first step was the realization that there is a problem. The next step and maybe the hardest step is to change the way things are. In order to make changes, (and I know I have said this before, but I think it's worth saying again) You have to do the exact opposite of what you are doing now. Which means stop doing what you are currently doing, it's not working! You mentioned you had no "us" time, and that is what I would start with first. MAKE COUPLE TIME! Put your child to bed and sit down and watch a movie together. Try to go to bed together and if nothing else, just cuddle. Talk about your day, and how you can make tomorrow better. You each need to talk about your dreams, goals, and what you want for the future. You each will have separate goals, but you will also need goals as a couple. \nI would also recommend counseling. You can use your pastor, (if you have one) A close family friend with whom you trust and can be neutral, or a professional counselor.\nOther things that you might want to try is a "date" night for you and hubby. Get a babysitter (one you trust) and go away for the weekend once every 3-6 months. Spend quality time together as a couple. it doesn't have to cost a fortune. All you need is a desire to want things to change and a creative mind. I wish you all of the best!
407066
Look to your three children and take care of them first.  Second finish your degree and follow your career.\n\nSounds to me like you need to prioritize things here and a man in your life is not exactly what you need right now.\n\nYou've met three Mr. Wrongs time to stop and think about what the next Mr. will bring, another child?\n\nThird well where ever you've met the past three STOP going their!
1002647
Don't react.  There is nothing to react to.  Look at the bigger picture.  The 5 year picture.  What are your goals and dreams?  Do you want to achieve those goals with your man?  Or do you want to end up ??????? hummmm.....  Sometimes you just have to tell him how you feel.  If you need attention tell him!!  He can't read your mind! If you are afraid to tell him that you need that extra special attention in the bedroom now, what makes you think you can tell him what your kids have done if you have any 10 or more years down the road?  Keeping secrets only intensifies the curiosity. Of *What if?* I had someone on the side?  Tell him what you want when you want it.  Change your schedule to fit his needs. If your relationship is that important to you.  Remember,  he won't always work this shift.  This is just a phase in a relationship.  Get through it, or leave... Because chances are if you don't realize this now, you will just be in agony.
921165
Well, you made the move so you will need to end it with the man you love. Why the move though? Why leave the man you love behind? I'm sure it was a real good reason to leave him. You can try to continue your love but there will be difficult times ahead. Prepare yourself. It's is time to move forward. Good luck.....SAM
446389
Memories are forever, you won't totally forget them. But I would try to keep busy, and be happy. After 3 yrs I don't think he's coming back anytime soon. Go out and mingle. Chances are you'll find someone else to think and talk about.
3797
at least 2yrs, and live together first
386896
Think you've already made your decision by moving out but instead of following your head or your heart follow your instincts,don't think that after being with someone soo long that you can start fresh like strangers,as you have said you'd need to fix what was wrong in the first place...but if he's not willing to do that what's the point of trying again,you have to think about yourself,and your children,life's to short to be messed about...your the only one to see the relationship they way it is so your the only one that can answer your question but if i was you i'd say away and listen to your instincts,your gut feeling they're very rarely wrong...
1002198
My advice too you man is too accept that you 2 are finished and move on! go out with friends and do stuff you know? dont listen to any love songs cuz it will remind you of her! dont sob over this too much! yeah 20 months is a hella long time too date and break up like that! but you have to move on and not look back!
129338
While it is to easy to succumb to the emotional anguish that is consuming you at this early stage you must put a few bricks up to get through it. Do not drive yourself insane with analizing the last five years. Enlist a support group, best friends, family etc. Go out to the movies, nothing romantic, just a good comedy, horror, action you get the point. Invite some friends over for a dinner party or skip the dinner and just party. Ask each of them to bring a new friend, someone you've never met. Meeting new people is a stimulant. Involve yourself in your favorite activities or hobbies to keep your mind occupied. Submerse yourself in some great books. Pamper yourself a little go on a shopping trip, but something fun and frivolous. Keeping busy is the best thing. Of course the nights will be the roughest. Go ahead and allow yourself to think about her if she comes to mind while you are trying to drift off to sleep. It is part of the healing process. Cry if need be, tears are the cleansing of our soul. Eventually the sorrow will subside. While I think it is important to surround yourself with good friends and meet new people just don't hook up with anyone. Five years is a long time to be with someone, you'll need to take a good year being single to rediscover who you are before enerting the dating game. Have fun, and remember it's ok to have your ups and downs. You'll be fine and who knows in the near future you may come to think the break up was a good thing, usually when one door closes it's because another is getting ready to open. Old cliche I know but it is so true.
47618
just try to act like you did 3 months ago around her..i mean it might be a little different but you can ask hows it going and whats new and anything you want.but just try not to act to quiet ok
197625
Yep it is hard to get back out there after being with the same person for a long time.I Have been divorced for over 3 years separated for over 6.If you just got a divorce you probably should not jump right into a relationship.But is hard to be alone so find yourself some old friends and hang out.If you are interested in a certain type of activity hang out there and find people with same interests.I myself cannot wait for the racing season to start at the dirt tracks....And am looking forward to going to hang out and drive the go carts in cottage grove.So hang where you are interested like baseball game... and find someone female that is interested in same things and build from there.I am also from Minnesota. Good luck.
1163249
about 25+ after a 2-3 year relationship
632877
If you feel that the time is right, if not then just keep going with it. If what your doing now seems to be working out, then why change it? Unless your both thinking about marriage, or you're living together and want the benefits of marriage, the way you're relationship is now is working. Although if you've been together for 3 years and arn't living together yet I'd suggest giving that a try, believe me it's very different and you get to know a lot more about eachother.
103519
You have to rediscover yourself. After three years, you have become so entwined in each others lives, it's like losing part of yourself.  Spend time with YOU before moving on.
320161
PUT DOWN THE PHONE AND STEP AWAY.  Do not call your ex.  You'll end up looking like a desperate fool who wants to get back together with him and he will feel like he has 'won'.  Yes, it's that childish.  Don't call him and don't expect him to call you.  That's what a break-up does; it stops contact between the two of you.  There may be a time and place that you can be friends, but it is NOT now.  Now so soon after your split.  I know it seems like it should be different given your time togehter, but it's not.  I was in a 3 year relationship with a guy I wanted to marry and it ended badly.  I didn't talk to the guy again until 3 years later and even then it was akward and came across as desperate and stupid.  You have to accept this relationship as being over.  The first few months will be a test of your strength, but you can get through it.  You will never forget this guy.  It's been 10 years now for me and I still think of him and hope he is well.  But that doesn't mean you can expect a good relationship from here on out.  It's over.  Let it be over and move on.  Don't call him, you'll end up regretting it big time.