Do you believe on arrange marriage?is it ok or effective?
412224
in my culture its natural to married with some  one withut being his gf or her bf ... well its better if the people know each other before getting marriage...but if its in their cultur like what is in my country then we have some steps....first they both have to see each other maybe they dont like their face (then how could they see each other every hr),then they can have their relation to know each other it depends on their family and both o f them ,)they can arrange to dont get married till the time they find each other caracter....then if they think all thing is close to be ok then married...but some people just wanna married....they think they will love each other later ,or will ecerything get ok afetr a while...then there is nothing in our hands...but arrange marriage is some kind of knowing people if we let them know each other better before the dealing....
696456
Oh Emilio, i couldnt agree with you more.\n\nEveryone's different; some people really want the dress, the cake, the whole shibang; some are quite happy to go off to Bali and get married under a palm tree with just the two of you.\n\nSome people dont feel the need for any of the above, and go on happily as long term partners.\n\nI personally think the whole white weding thing is ok if you keep it resonable, and affordable. But when it gets out of control, and you find yourself in debt for the rest of your days just so she can have the whole fairytale, then it's a problem.\n\nMe, i opted for a quiet little ceremony; it doesn't diminish how much i love my husband, and we've still got our sanity and our bank balance in order.\n\nEach to their own, good luck matey.
1087756
I dont know how reliable they are but they may be safe. However you should find someone you love to marry and not have it be an arranged marriage.
1166445
WELL IN THE BIBLE IT SAYS TO OBEY YOUR PNTS.. BUT TO HAVE AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE I WOULDNT DO.. ESPECIALLY IF YOU DONT LOVE HIM ITS NOT TRUE LOVE AND YOU SHOULD BE IN LOVE WITH THE PERSON YOU ARE GOING TO MARRY...
563095
For the vast majority of western people, no.  But, I am sure that there are some families who still practice arranged marriage.  I don't personally know any, though.
1015413
I am a white, Canadian woman, 48 years old...I think arranged marriages are archaic and a form of abuse.  I have met four women of Indian decent who were forced into arranged marriages and every single husband was abusive in his own way.  Three of them only wanted to come to Canada and bring their families and the fourth was a doctor who refused to speak with his wife after a long day at work, while his wife wasn't allowed to work - they had no children and she was alone in a strange city.\n\nWhen you buy a product, you hope it will work or do the job for you but there's always a product that doesn't live up to expectations.  I do not think it's much different when you select a spouse out of the air either.  Unfortunately, the woman is always the one who suffers - in my experience.
819151
Sure, lets get married. Would that help you?
239332
It will work as long as you trust each other and you are committed.  I am in the same situation.
866036
whatever comes natural. Do what you "both" agree on. If this is difficult --dont get married--
742475
I would have to say all the answers above me are true.  People do marry for the wrong reasons or the reasons don't match or the reasons conflict.  Getting married because all your friends are getting married is the worse and so is because my biological clock is ticking.  I think what happens is that yes the vows are supposed to be sacred but, what happens is their points of view or their reasons are more sacred than a vow to another person and to their higher being.   In today's society where doing it your way has become so important, we forget there is another person "sharing" our lives.  We are so self absorbed with ourselves that the marriage is not a partnership where 2 people work together it has become a status symbol that we have lost the context or meaning of.  Personally, I have always taken words in most vows very seriously.  Till death do us part, could be a long time!!!  Maybe that is why I have taken looking for the "right" person so seriouly and so long.  I have been single all my life, 52 years.  Is this the right way or wrong way?  It's the way it happened.   I take the vows to heart and many do not.  They become enamored with the rite of marriage and ceremony and the attention.  I keep looking beyond that and see if I could live with the person next to me for the next 30-40 years and be happy.  If we all took the vows to heart, that it was like a life or death vow.  Maybe not so many people would get married so rashly.  Don't you think?  \n\nBTW I have a girlfriend now, she wants to marry me but, not for a few years.  I have no problem with that.  Gives us more time to learn more about each other.  She's great.\n\nGood luck
635085
Yes, I believe in marriage. I married my husband because I was, and still am, in love with him. In the eyes of GOD, we share each other and are bonded to one another. We became one person on that day. That's not to say that we don't have individual thoughts, feelings and ideas but to say that we share feelings, thoughts and ideas with each other in a way unlike if we knew "there would be a way out" or "backdoor". He is half of me and I half of him. We have from that day on thought of each other and consulted each other before making decisions to be courteous and considerate of the other feelings. The one you marry would, rather should, love you through it all and truly mean the words he/she vows. For me, I know my husband does and as do I. It's hard but it's well worth all the effort. I hope that you can find this kind of love and one day decide to share this kind of bond with someone you will love for always. Best wishes. Take care.
319125
WOW! If you're doing it for the right reasons it is! And both of you are in agreement and God has revealed to you both that you're meant for each other, and are going to get married. I'd say most girls wouldn't find it attractive. But I do. In fact I'm doing the same thing. I'm waiting for marriage, and I think its great! Go you! What self-control!\nKeep at it hun, you gonna make your bride feel like a queen on her wedding day knowing you waited all your life for her!!
191113
If you are asking about marrying for love versus an arranged marriage.....the divorce rate in the US is 50% and I think its much less in S.E. Asia (is that where you are from?)  However if you feel like you were forced into a situation that cannot be good either.  I think in India (S.E. Asia) the reason arranged marriages work so well is because the people are more willing to compromise probably because they don't really have a choice.
797239
If you are wise enough to differentiate beween infatuation and love, then love marriage is the way to go.  However, if you are not sure about yourself, maybe you should leave it to your parents.  Some people prefer arranged only to be able to blame their parents if it doesn't work out.  I think that is too shallow if you consider marriage to be the single most important decision in your life that should be treated as an investment.
877282
First love. Then marriage. Married life might turn out to be unhappy in the long run as the pot of love is half empty before marriage. \nHahahaha...don't worry its better than arranged marriages as you have a good idea of your would be spouse before you wed him/her.
932521
i think it puts the responsibility of the marriage on the parents, for they (and the matchmaker) are making the decision.  it is probably one of the parents that has more of a say in the decision than the other.  also the "other" parents or the matchmaker influence the decision heavily.  \n \nthe marriage in these cases is also going to based on financial and social considerations as opposed to "love", with the assumption that "love" and / or (at least) "attachment" will follow with time.    \n\nas far as i am concerned, i think that parents or older people may have better insight into what a young person needs, sometimes more than the young persons know.  the chance of happiness and a good life may be good.  \n\nbut the final decision of marrying is based on the young person with minimal contact.  \n\nconsidering that marriage is fairly weak in the west and divorce is rampant.  i dont think that people can judge an arranged marriage as worse.  \n\nmy friend left asia and went to the west because she was afraid of an arranged marriage.  her father was very old fashioned and stubborn, and she was afraid of his decision making because her religious views were different than her father. \nshe felt that she needed a say in the decision. \n\nbest of luck to you!
977709
=when I was younger i thought arranged marriage thing was insane. Now that I have been divorced twice and have had several relationships that didn't work out it doesn't seem so crazy. Who would know what is best for you besides your parents. If you are a parent with dating adult ch8children you will understand this. why is it I can spot a loser with my kids, but tend to still pick them myself? Years ago they had (and I think still do) mail order brides. We call it Internet dating!