Say u and yo bf feel like ur ready 4 a baby but neither have a job,  is in skool and stay in diff state?
411429
How can you say you're ready for a baby when you don't have the financial security to raise it?
96005
Wow.  You take me back.  I had to handle school and four children from age 2 1/2 to 7.  It was a long time ago - 25 years.  And I was younger.  But I know how you feel.  I always thought "when I have the time, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown, because I deserve it."  Funny, huh.  \n\nTry to make sure you get enough sleep.  Without it, school is so much harder.  See if you can get help with babysitting.  I wasn't aware til my last year in school that the state would have paid for babysitting for me.  See if you can talk to a counselor there and find out all the programs you qualify for that might give you some help.  Enlist any friends or family and don't feel guilty about it.\n\nI felt a lot like I was not giving enough attention to my kids, and maybe I wasn't.  But now they have children of their own and they grew up ok.  \n\nTake some deep breaths.  Know you can do it.  And that it too will pass.  (I wondered at the time if that light at the end of the tunnel was really an oncoming train.  It just didn't seem to end.)\n\nGood luck to you.  And, in a funny way, thanks for reminding me of things I have been through.  I admire you greatly.  By comparison, the things that are going on in my life right now do not seem so bad at all.
508600
My feeling is you are ready when the thought of it doesnt scare the heck out of you.  You know that financially you can handle it and you feel like your partner is stable.
240890
Sometimes college isn't the right choice for some people. My parents had the biggest plans for me and I just wasn't ready to commit to another 4-7 years of school. I decided to take my own path. Now I married with 2 beautiful boys and my parents wouldn't trade their grandchildren for anything in the world. Now that I am ready I'm going to take courses on-line for accounting and maybe some child care incase I decide to open a daycare. So give him room and let him make his own choices he might suprise you. Maybe in his time he will go to college. If not he can still make a life for himself. Just watch and see. My parents can't believe the way my life turned out I'm happier than ever. Life does have its challenges but they have ways of working themselves out.
905225
Wait until both of you finish school. You don't want him to end up just being your baby's daddy, do you?
123825
Dude, don't worry about! When you're ready to settle down, you will! Don't get anyone to force you to do anything you're not ready to do, yet! And I mean, no one! No one in your family, your buddies, your g/f's parents, a pastor, priest, NO ONE!
130646
For an eighteen year old being in a permanent relationship is a scary thing especially when there is the added pressure of having to be a dad.  It would make me feel vulnerable too.  He's got some growing up to do before he's ready for that level of committment.  That doesn't mean that he won't mature and be with you.  He should be if he's your baby's dad, but don't rush into the committment just because you have a child together.  In the long run that could be worse for the child.  Both of you are going to change a lot in the coming years and that dynamic aspect of your personality will leave anyone feeling vulnerable.  It sounds like he might be on the right track though.  He's got himself in college and he's willing to express his feelings concerning his vulnerability which is really hard for a guy to do.  Give him some time.  Give yourself some time.  It sounds like you might have winner in a few years.
192209
compromise, do the career first. because it is definately harder when you have kids. personal experience. i don't get to spend much time with mine and it makes me feel guilty. but if i didn't work and do my career, i feel like i haven't fulfilled my destiny. i went at this backwards and now im paying for it. if i could i would do the job first that way i wouldn't regret it later. then you would have all the time in the world to be a mom.
696540
"Psychic"... A psychick would be a psychiatrist's girlfriend.\nI checked what's going on in your and spouse's b'day's. Get through November, and you'll start seeing a little more light. Although you probably would not wanted to have done this, but, you would have been better off, by 'you' not working, reducing your income, thus, qualifying your family for temporary support. You could have gone back (*or still can) to school, because, next year, you would be in a great position to make a 'career' change, big time! Not only could you be doing something, that would 'pay' more, and be more secure, but, it would be fulfilling a dream, that you have had, but, almost have given up on...Are your children all from this 'marriage'??? If not, what's up with past due child support? No can do? There are organizations, that can assist with that, as well. As far as 'hubby' goes...I'm sure it was not entirely his fault that he was not employed for a 'few' months, it doesn't take long to suffer a set-back. I don't feel like he is doing the type of work, that he is capable of, and or enjoys. Government housing, sounds like a 'dirty word', but, there are many aspects to assistance, and aid. That is what we pay taxes for. Is hubby a 'vet'? does he have any benefits from the government? You don't always need it to purchase government seized property. Not only could you get caught up, you can instill a future for not only yourselves, but, your children, as well. If you further your education and training, you can be getting into a better occupation, within the year. As your income level rises, then hubby can go into some form of training and or trade-program, if he so desires. By the beginning of 2008, not only could you be in your own home, but have secure jobs and futures. Your kid's could be more optomistic about their futures, and their self-worth. Good-Luck!!!
303526
wow seems (1)maybe either your bf could stay one semester for you and you both can transfer in the spring.   (2)try taking some courses at a community college, start applying for financial aid now, i'm from texas so i know most community colleges will have financial aid available during the summer if you sign up early enough.  or (3)stay a semester alone without him, it would just be for about 3-4 months, and then transfer in the spring.  i wish you luck, and remember why you are in college ok. don't make it all about your bf.  take care!
520599
I was too. Sometimes I still am a bit, but then I realize..she has a stressfull job, a husband, 2 kids....and doesnt go out much. Thats when i'm happy to be me, with no kids, still in college and going out. You just have to understand that everyone is different. You'll have your day.
77040
Tell him that you need to wait and both you and your boyfriend should consider finishing schools or any carrer goals so that you can provide for your child.  If he loves you he can wait until you are ready.
30852
This is a very tricky situation.  I remember when I was young my mother went back to school and was gone a LOT of the time.  I missed her dearly, but in the end it was for the best - I eventually got my mommy back, and she was much happier having a degree and good job.  Sometimes you have to sacrifice a little to get where you want to be.
239017
If you don't feel you are ready then don't. Becuase if you aren't happy about the situation now, you won't be happy in the marriage. Do what you think is best--don't let anyone tell you that you have to marry someone just because they want you to.\n\nI am having this problem with my future mother in law about children. She thinks I should have kids becuase she did, my parents did etc. She also wants grandchildren. If she wants them so badly, then she can go and adopt them. It's my body, my decision, and if I want kids, then I will have them. Not because someone else said so, or because that is what they want.\n\nYou are in control of yourself--just because they are pressuring you, don't cave. Be strong and listen to your heart! People got on my back about getting married several years ago, and I finally yelled at them and told them to quit asking--it will happen when it does. A couple years later, we were engaged, but not because they said so. We did it when we were ready. That is what you should do too.\n\nDo it when you are ready.
547185
it depends on the relationship. if your happy and have done all your fun things and want to settle down than i think one is good for now. so you can get the feeling of how fatherhood is like and you must have a good job that's paying kind of allot. because babies don't come cheap! there is so much to learn when your a father. and is she the right one? do you want to spend the rest of you life with her and no other person? do you and her have a good relationship understanding each other?
797244
i think like that sometimes, im 25 and just split up with the man of my dreams and best friend. we were engaged and i thought that was it for me happy ever after, but it dont always work like that. maybe one day i just dream these days and it hurts but i got my lil girl and we do lots of things together and beilieve it or not it is a bonus being able do what you want. if your early 20's and no kids get out with the girls enjoy yourself first. i missed out on all that and it still didnt get me happily married. i do have a beautiful daughter though that i wouldent swap for the world. im going for a career in nursing so that should keep me busy. stop looking thats what im gonna do. good luck chick.x
175563
I'm assuming they are grown. If thats the case then it depends on what they are doing. If they have jobs and are able to take care of themselves then talk to them and tell them to find a place. If they don't work, give them a set time to find a job where they can move out. If they are in school, wait until they finish school and find a job. Don't be in a hurry to push your kids aside for a "new" relationship that might not even work out.