how do i know when i am over a past relationship?
398751
if you feel comfortable to move on. usually it takes awhile, you have be content with yourself, then you'll know you've moved on.
325148
First allow yourself to grieve and own up to what went wrong without blaming another person.  That is how we grow up.  Then start to dream again.  The past relationship wasn't right or else it would have worked out.  So, start dreaming about that perfect person.  What would they look like, how would they make you feel, what would you do together.  The more you can let go of the old and welcome the new the better.  Look at it as having a white canvas where you can begin to create once again.  Enjoy the process and do a lot of nice things for yourself that make you feel good.  Start looking for the joy in your life from other ways.  Good luck.
693013
You will feel better with time; and you are not the only one who experienced this. So, move on and know life will get better. Also, you will have a better idea of what to look for in your next relationship..
169731
Its called feelings. Once youve been with someone you develop them. Its sometimes hard to forget them because with those feelings come memories. It may take a while for you to get over them.
545960
Have your mind made up. This is the hardest part. Make sure this is what you want. If you think there is still something left inside of you for this person, chances are you will go back and will repeat these steps over again. \nMake a written list of all the reasons why things will be better if the relationship is over. Think of what will happen if you stay with this person, and how many years of your life you could end up spending on an unhealthy relationship. Keep this list close to you at all times. \nThink ahead. Have a day when you decide it's over and you are going to move on. Don't just jump up and leave on an impulse. If you can, talk to that person and say, "When rent is up this month, I am going to find another place" or "I'm moving in with my parents" or "You need to leave at the end of this month." This gives the person time to make arrangements. And, it's much easier to go back on an impulse then it is to go back on a calmly and clearly stated intention. \nKeep the peace. Don't allow the person to suck you into the same old arguments, guilt trips, or drama. State your intention and walk away. Case closed. There's nothing left to do but follow through. \nOnce on your own, treat yourself. If you don't, you may get bored and call this person. Make some new friends and constantly have something up your sleeve. Do things that you were not able to do because of this person. This will let you know that you have still got it and make you feel good inside. \nCut off all communication. Even if you intend to stay friends, it's a good idea to avoid contact with this person for at least a month after you break up. Otherwise, it's extremely easy for them to slip right back into their old role in your life and start the cycle all over again. \nTry not to think about or bring up old memories. If friends start talking about this person, tell them you don't want to talk about it, whether good or bad. Get rid of gifts, photographs, and any other relics of the relationship--or at least put them way out of sight. \nPrepare for the possibility that your ex may say things to your friends, family or co-workers and make you look bad. He or she may not have been ready to let go like you did. Be the mature one and laugh about it. Eventually it will stop. \nRemember that this was just not the "one." Oh well, things couldn't work out. This is life. Make sure you still have what it takes to be good to the next person you are with. Remember the traits of the person you left and compare them to the person to are interested in. This will help it from happening again.
587692
It depends on how your ex-relationship ended. If you broke up with her it depends on how you feel about the person you're with. If she broke up with you then don't, you have to keep your dignity. She broke up with you and you have moved on with somebody new.
331847
if u haven't been able to get over the other person and feel like ur not ready to trust another man than maybe u should take time for urself first n see were ur feelings r at n wat u want out of this new guy in ur life its not really good to get into a new relationship right after ending one specially wen the last 1 was of 20 yrs .. like i said the best thing is u knowing exactly wat u want so u can get rid of the doubts u have and b able to open up 2 a new person .. u wouldnt want to mess up somethin dat can turn out 2 be good cause u not ready for it so give it time.... good luck
200256
Your ex is your ex for a reason.  Why ruin what you say is a great relationship by letting old feelings from your past interfere?  You have been moving forward without your ex just fine so why go back now?  It is normal to have feelings for your ex but you need to store them away and concentrate on what you have now.
1031643
First, I respect your courage for writing here, but I would take the most serious advice from those who know you best... those closest to you. There aren't enough details in your story for anyone but those who know you to give you good advice, but a lot of people have similar feelings. When I was single I always pined for my ex's... the bad times didn't register and all I remembered was the good times. This doesn't mean that they didn't happen and that what drove me from my now ex's wasn't real. We did break up for a reason, and our incompatibility was something to be considered. No matter what you do, even if you did get back together, you can't relive a memory. This isn't to say you shouldn't talk to your ex or figure out what you're feeling, but I'd say take your time with it. If the feeling is really real, if the relationship is meant to be, then it's worth waiting for. A lot of times things seem good at the time, but if we waited, we lose interest or realize what a bad decision it was. Even so, you have a fractured relationship, and it's going to take a lot of care and thought to bring it together... either way, protect your own heart and take your time. Find someone you really trust and talk to them about it and let them speak into you... tell you a no bs assessment of what they can see from the outside. Even if you don't agree with them, it'll get you thinking. I wish you the best with your relationship, whether it's meant to be repaired or not. God bless you,\n\nBrian
645860
I agree with some of the other responses. You need to start with a clean slate. Stop thinking of the past because this unfortunately could harm some really awesome relationships you may encounter. Have you ever tried to seek help for your trust issues? Maybe you should seek counseling to work through your emotions. It is not easy to find a good guy, but as I say this to most women, there are warning signs/red flags to look out for when you are dating. If something seems off and your heart is telling you something, don't continue to date the guy. A lot of women choose to ignore the red flags and then get put through the wringer. Take your experiences and learn from them. As soon as your gut is telling you something is wrong, ditch the guy. Everyone has instincts, and they are  always right. But when you do get into that good relationship, do not blame what a horrible ex has done to you on a nice guy. That is awful when girls or guys do that. You need to try and get over it. Guys and Girls alike hate getting blamed for stuff that they did not do. Good luck!
1165192
You have the answer in your headline. The fact is, you do want to try the whole relationship thing again. It would help if we knew how long the two of you have been seeing each other, then again, it almost sounds like its a very new relationship. If it is a new relationship, then get to know him without revealing too much about your past hurts. If you really like this guy, get to know him without worrying about how it might end. Go into with an open mind and see where it goes. If you do not give yourself the opportunity to get to know someone first, without judging from what's happened in your past, you'll never find out if he's the right one for you. Life's too short, you never know when the love of your life will stand before you. Build walls and he will never find his way to your heart.
338658
I don't think what you are going through is all that much different than what most of us go through when we lose someone we really care about.  A year may sound like a long time but it really isn't if you really loved someone.  The problem here is that while you know the relationship is over, you haven't really put it into its proper place in your life.  The memories are not going to go away and since a lot of them are good memories there is no reason to want them to go away.  So treasure those memories for what they are and that is some really happy times that are part of your past.  What you have been doing is letting those memories control your life.  Memories are very strong things and over time they actually gain strength because the details are blurred and all you focus on is the best parts of them.  This means that when you compare them to current situations they always seem so much better.  The reality is that they really weren't.  You have just chosen to not remember the bad times or the parts that made it more ordinary.  You need to stop living in the past because nothing is ever going to compare to memories that have all the bad stuff removed.  You need to realize that you deserve to be happy and the only way to do that is to let the past be the past and make new memories and stop constantly comparing your current life to those old memories.  Trust me, we all do it but we all find that in reality there is a lot more to life and always more wonderful memories to be made.
841353
If she can't let go of the things in the past because yall have a history together, then maybe it's time to find someone new, whom you have no history with and they cannot yell at you for your past faults. Maybe you won't mess the new relationship up!
513083
You never really get over your first love. If you want to move on you have to find something or someone to fill your extra time. Maybe you need some time without some one until you are confident again. It is ultimately up to you when you want to start a new relationship. Jump back in only when your ready.
1090951
Only in terms of STDs you might have, or if you have been raped or sexually assaulted - things that might impact on your current relationship.\n\nI think the past is the past, and you don't need to discuss anything you don't want to.
42665
Cuz you're not fully get over the last one yet. Give yourself some alone time, enjoy yourself before getting back in another relationship.
648521
wen u talk about ur past relationships.