Do you know any Chuck Norris jokes?
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Switzerland is not really a neutral country, they are just waiting to see which side Chuck Norris is on.
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chuck norris burns hotter than the sun, why cant we feel this heat? chances are your already dead!
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he doesn't chuck was the man in his time and now it's jackies time where did you get your info\n) Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the\n\nprobability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.\n\n2) Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.\n\n3) A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't\n\nyou know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured\n\nthis man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever\n\nsaw, was a fatal roundhouse kick delivered by Chuck Norris.\n\n4) Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.\n\n5) When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and\n\nincludes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck\n\nNorris has not had To pay taxes ever.\n\n6) Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck\n\nNorris.\n\n7) Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is\n\nafraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.\n\n8) As a teen Chuck Norris impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away\n\nin the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to\n\nthe1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in\n\nprofessional football history.\n\n9) A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for\n\nhandicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot\n\nbelongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park\n\nthere.\n\n10) Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't\n\nthe best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as\n\nthe worst mistake anyone has ever made.\n\n11) If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow down.\n\n12) At birth, Chuck Norris came out feet first so he could roundhouse\nkick the doctor in the face. Nobody delivers Chuck Norris but Chuck Norris\nChuck Norris once tried to defeat Jackie Chan in a game of chess. When Norris lost, he won in life by roundhouse kicking Chan in the side of the face.\n\nChuck Norris' roundhouse kick is so powerful; it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.\n\nChuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany. \n\nChuck Norris can cut onions without crying.\n\nChuck Norris burned down an entire forest when he was experimenting with water.\n\nIf you want a list of Chuck Norris' enemies just check the extinct species list.\n\nChuck Norris has never blinked in his entire life. Never. \n\nChuck Norris can believe it's not butter.\n\nWhen Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one thanksgiving, Chuck said, "don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with\ncranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."\n\nWe once had a bachelor party for Chuck Norris. He ate the entire cake before they could tell him there was a stripper in it.
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I'm ready for that stupid f ucking joke to die already.  I'm not calling Chuck Norris a joke and wanting him to die, I just want the joke itself to die.
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chuck norris let the dogs out, then he round house kicked them through an oldsmobile
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Chuck Norris is an experienced martial artist and former world Karate champion. He has trained with Bruce Lee and helped him create his famous style Jeet Kun Do.\nMacGyver gets his butt kicked every week it is a no contest.
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Who is Chuck Norris Fighting for?
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The cure for cancer can be found in a tear from Chuck Norris.
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WTF?  Does this even need to be asked?  Chuck Norris created the universe with a roundhouse kick, I think he's more powerful than the stupid Terminator.
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arnold schwarznegger, chuck norris
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I haven't but my husband has....\nHe was taking a karate class in South Carolina and Chuck Norris was invited to the class as a guest instructor. Norris asked if anyone would care to step up and spar with him, and like THE DINGLE-BERRY DUMB-ASS he is, my husband, in a moment of sheer stupidity said he would. Well he goes up to Chuck Norris, they do they're bow and then Tony, my husband, kicks Chuck Norris right in the face. And before Tony had a chance to even realize what he'd done, Norris layed him out. And I mean LAYED HIM OUT!!!!! Tony said the last thing he remembers is seeing that big foot coming at him at what seemed like light speed and then looking up at the ceiling.\nTrue Story, no joke!\nIs my man not a big DUMB goof-ball or what?\nAnd what made it worse, when Tony returned back to the class, the next day, the instructor conned Tony into sparring with his 9 year old daughter and she wopped his butt, too!\nLMAO\nBut in his defense the little had been taking Karate since she was about 3 or 4 so, she was way more advanced than him, and in so many ways, lol!
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Chuck Norris (Did you ever see his round house kick?)
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WHO: Chuck Norris\nWHAT: Fighting Schwarzenegger\nWHEN: On Chuck's Birthday\nWHERE: In the Ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese's\nWHY: To throw Schwarzenegger into the sun
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chuck norris does not use condoms because there is no protection against chuck norris. \n\nchuck norris has counted to infinity twice. and can divide by zero.\n\none day chuck norris walked down the street with a full erection. there were no survivors.\n\nchuck norris only masturbates to pictures of chuck norris.
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Chuck Norris would win
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Chuck Norris would roundhouse kick him into oblivion.
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Chuck Norris\nFrom Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia\nJump to: navigation, search\nChuck Norris.\nEnlarge\nChuck Norris.\n\nCarlos Ray Norris Jr., known as Chuck Norris, (born March 10, 1940), is a martial artist, an American action star, and Hollywood actor.\nContents\n[hide]\n\n    * 1 Biography\n          o 1.1 Beginnings\n          o 1.2 Rise to fame\n          o 1.3 Walker, Texas Ranger\n    * 2 Family\n    * 3 Recent years\n    * 4 Popular culture\n    * 5 Trivia\n    * 6 Filmography\n    * 7 Bibliography\n    * 8 Notes\n    * 9 External links\n\n[edit]\n\nBiography\n[edit]\n\nBeginnings\n\nA native of Ryan, Oklahoma, Norris has two younger brothers, Wieland and Aaron Norris, the latter of which is a Hollywood producer. Norris' Great Uncle is the American Novelist Frank Norris. Norris was born to an alcoholic Cherokee Indian father and Irish mother.[1] When Norris was ten, his parents divorced[2] and he later relocated to Prairie Village, Kansas and then Torrance, California with his mother and brothers.[3] Norris describes his childhood as downbeat. He was unathletic, shy, and scholastically mediocre. Kids would taunt his mixed ethnicity — wistfully he wanted to beat up his tormenters.[4]\n\nNorris finished high school and soon married his girlfriend, Diane Holechek. In 1958 Norris joined the United States Air Force as a Military Policeman and was sent to Osan Air Base South Korea. It was in South Korea that Norris acquired the nickname Chuck and began his training in Tang Soo Do, an interest that would segue into black belts in Tang Soo Do and Tae Kwon Do, both Korean martial arts, Shinto-Ryu Karate, and a brown belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu; and the founding of the Chun Kuk Do ("Universal Way") form and the education association (United Fighting Arts Federation). When he returned to the states he continued to act as an MP at March Air Force Base California. Norris was discharged in August of 1962 without seeing combat. He worked for the Northrop corporation and opened a chain of karate schools, which the son of Steve McQueen attended.[5]\n[edit]\n\nRise to fame\nChuck Norris.\nEnlarge\nChuck Norris.\n\nIn 1968, Norris became Middleweight Karate champion (non-contact), a title he held for seven consecutive years.[6] In 1969, he won Karate's triple crown for the most tournament wins of the year, and the fighter of the year award by Black Belt magazine. It was also in 1969 that Norris made his acting debut, in the Dean Martin movie The Wrecking Crew.\n\nIn 1970, his younger brother Weiland was killed in Vietnam. Norris later dedicated his Missing in Action films to his brother's memory.\n\nAt a martial arts demonstration in Long Beach, Norris met the soon-to-be famous Bruce Lee. In 1972, he acted as Bruce Lee's nemesis in the movie Way of the Dragon, and in 1974, McQueen encouraged him to begin acting classes at the MGM Studio.\n\nNorris' first starring role was 1977's Breaker, Breaker!, and subsequent films such as The Octagon (1980), An Eye for an Eye (1981), and Lone Wolf McQuade proved his increasing box office bankability. In 1984, Norris starred in Missing in Action, the first of a series of POW rescue fantasies produced by Israeli cousins Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus and released under their Cannon Films banner. Also in that year, he was offered the part of the sensei of the villain dojo in the movie The Karate Kid, but declined the part. He reportedly did not want to take part in depicting martial artists in an unfavorable light. [7].\n\nOver the next four years, Norris became Cannon's most prominent star, appearing in eight films, including Code of Silence, The Delta Force, and Firewalker, in which he co-starred with Academy Award winner Louis Gossett, Jr.\n[edit]\n\nWalker, Texas Ranger\nChuck Norris as Texas Ranger Cordell Walker in Walker, Texas Ranger\nEnlarge\nChuck Norris as Texas Ranger Cordell Walker in Walker, Texas Ranger\n\nBy the close of the 1980s, Cannon Films