should I waite for my man to get out of prison in 2 yrs?
369117
If it's love, you'll wind up waiting no matter what anyone says and you might be right....Babydoll, I don't know your jailbird, so I can't make any comment about whether or not he'd be worth waiting for, but I can tell you this, with absolute certainty: Loving an inmate is a VERY HARD ROAD...after 7 months, you already know a lot of this....it's about slogging through endless paperwork, it's trying to keep up with rules that seem to change every week, it's waiting for incredibly expensive collect phone calls that might or might not come and when he doesn't call, praying with all your heart that the phones in the day room are just either too busy or broken and that he's not hurt or on lockdown, it's becoming obsessive about checking your mail and the heartsick feeling that comes over you when the letter you want so badly isn't there,it's about getting writers cramp and spending $20 a week on stamps and stationary, it's about dealing with either keeping it secret or dealing with disapproval of the relationship everywhere you turn and mostly it means living in a future you can't be sure of and that really does take a toll.\nIf I had a choice, I wouldn't do it, but I've loved the guy for over 20 years and I can't quit now...and I'm almost 40, so it's not as if I'm spending my youth dealing with the Dept.of Corrections...think carefully, Sweetie, it is a hard, hard thing to do and no guarantees\n\nIf you want input from others who are in the same boat, check out http://www.prisontalk.com
620453
My Dad went to Jail for two years...Mostly drinking and driving related.  I was seventeen when this happened..It hurts to see someone you care about in trouble.  I Love my dad soooo much but be carefull..and make sure your taking care of yourself..This guy may or may not learn from his mistakes..Don't let him drag you down..even if you do love him.
389309
FIRST LET ME START OFF BY SAYING THAT I'M SORRY THAT THIS IS HAPPENING TO YOU. NOW EVERYONE IS TELLING YOU TO LEAVE HIM. IT'S EASIER TO SAY THAN TO DO. YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART THAT YOU LOVE YOUR HUSBAND I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 8 YEARS I SHOULD KNOW AND I'M ONLY 25 HE'S 40. I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE ALONE ALL OF THE TIME. I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU TO TAKE HIM TO A REHAB CUZ THEY WILL NOT ACCEPT HIM IF HE IS NOT WILLING TO GO. I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU TO CALL THE COP'S ON HIM OR THE DRUG DEALER CUZ YOUR HUSBAND CAN FIND DRUGS IN JAIL AND THERE WILL ALWAYS BE DRUGS ON THE STREETS. BUT I WILL TELL YOU THIS HIS DRUG IS HIS WIFE NOW HE HAS TO SUPPORT HER AND BE DEVOTED TO HER. THIS MAY BE THE HARDIEST THING TO DO BUT IF YOU LEAVE AND COME BACK YOU MIGHT COME BACK TO A EMPTY HOME. WHAT YOU CAN DO IS THIS EITHER TAKE HIM ON A TALK SHOW AND LET THEM HELP HIM OR SIGN HIM IN A MENTAL HOSPITAL IT WILL BE FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHS BUT IF YOU WANT TO SAVE HIM THIS IS SOMETHING THAT NEEDS TOBE DONE YOU CAN ONLY DO THIS IF YOU ARE HIS LEGAL WIFE. BECAUSE HE IS COMMTING SUICIDE BUT IT'S JUST SLOWLY.
108699
Sweetheart, I've been in the same boat except I was like 13 and he was 18. You're so very young, and i know you love him and he probably loves you too. But if they catch you even kissing him, he could be put away. Do you know what they do to guys like that in prison? Hopefully you don't. Listen honey, I know you want to be with him forever but trust me in that you're going to get older, your tastes are going to change, you have your whole life ahead of you, and it's not fair to him to make him wait. I had the same situation, and here I am, 7 years later, getting married to the most perfect guy in the world. It took me so long to realize what I wanted in a life partner, but I found it. And the guy I was in love with got married and had a beautiful family. So it all worked out and it can for you too. I'm sure he'll understand.\nBest of luck to you hon.
123080
6 months is really a very brief period, it will be over before you know it... If you really care about him, wait.\nUsually my answer to this sort of question is about how hard it is and how costly, but the "It's a hard road" speech is aimed at women looking at years not months... over a six month sentence, Buck up, Buttercup, write letters and visit and after he's released THEN decide if you're staying or not, but don't cut out on him right when he most needs your support.
147902
Get a divorce. It isn't fair for your spouse to expect your marriage to stay intact when they're in jail. Do you really want to be married to an ex-con? You don't neccesarily need to tell that you are having a fair but I would file for divorce while they are in jail and can't get pissed and come over and fight with you. He really can't do anything from jail. Congrats on finding new love and wasting away waiting for your lover to get out of jail. Move on with your life and be happy that you found new love.
969650
First of all, I think you're putting yourself in a dangerous situation. Second of all, I'd let the authorities know.  If he has been convicted before and is engaging in this type of behavior, he'll go right back to jail. If he hasn't been convicted then he needs to be. Either way you need to make the authorities aware of the situation.
953060
Disregard all the stupid answers, listen to the good ones. Do your time it will bring closure to the past. Be a model prisoner and 6 months will not really be six months. You will get credits for good behaviour. \nStay away from trouble makers in prison.\nYour family will feel the hurt but if they truly love you they will stick with you. Make it up to them by being kind and loving before you go into prison and after you come out.  \nIt is o.k. to be scared of prison. Express your feelings to a social worker, pastor or other spiritual advisor. \nYou changed your life around and you will overcome this new challenge as well. Good luck.
1038293
Although I don't agree with the idea of you aiding this guy, you may want to call social services (or whatever they call it in your state) at the prison.  They will be able to answer all your questions and guide you in the right direction.  Good luck and make sure you keep those daughters safe whatever you do with him.
479372
if it was a one off i would say stick it out if u really love each other but it seems to b a on going thing him going to jail u need to get on with ur life in a steady relationship with someone thats always going to b around for u not in and out of jail
1183088
If you are saying what I think your saying I would get away from that dude. It's only been 5 weeks. If he is doing things he shouldn't be doing and you are hanging around him you are going to get in trouble, or get hurt. I knew a girl once who had a boyfriend who was involved in that crap and she is dead now. Just think this way too, that dude is going to be in prison soon so you won't see him anyways. And that's the truth.
777652
You need to get over this fast and leave this man alone.  You've just confessed to sending him to jail.  I don't think he'll want a second date.
180537
How long is he down for? How did you meet him? I know of some wonderful, loving relationships that started behind the wall, but there are just as many stories where it just couldn't work with the seperation and stories where the guy was just using a girl to pass the time then dumped her when he got released, so take it slow. And I have to give you two cents worth of personal experience here Babydoll, I don't know your jailbird, so I can't make any comment about whether or not he'd be worth waiting for, but I can tell you this, with absolute certainty: Loving an inmate is a VERY HARD ROAD....it's about slogging through endless paperwork, it's trying to keep up with rules that seem to change every week, it's waiting for incredibly expensive collect phone calls that might or might not come and when he doesn't call, praying with all your heart that the phones in the day room are just either too busy or broken and that he's not hurt or on lockdown, it's becoming obsessive about checking your mail and the heartsick feeling that comes over you when the letter you want so badly isn't there,it's about getting writers cramp and spending $20 a week on stamps and stationary, it's about dealing with either keeping it secret or dealing with disapproval of the relationship everywhere you turn and mostly it means living in a future you can't be sure of and that really does take a toll.\nIf I had a choice, I wouldn't do it, but I've loved the guy for over 20 years and I can't quit now...and I'm almost 40, so it's not as if I'm spending my youth dealing with the Dept.of Corrections...think carefully, Sweetie, it is a hard, hard thing to do and no guarantees. \nIf you want more perspective from women who deal with this reality every day, please visit http://www.prisontalk.com
466555
I would give him two months, this gives you time to make some phone calls and connections and will give both of you plenty of time to decide if this is truly what you want.
603995
Find out when he is getting out.  He should have a court date set to be sentenced or they could give him a bail amount.  It could take up to a week to find this out.  Alot of guys in jail have girlfriends but most of them arent even worth it.  If you love him you can go and visit.  Just contact the jail.
653384
To tell you the truth you may want to wait till he is in prison.That way you can hold hands hug kiss and have a Little more family and friends there.You will have to wait till he gets out of coratien but i think you both would be happier.Good luck.
254078
Leave his @ss...if it's weird and doesn't feel right, then that's not a relationship you need to be in. Just because you've been together for 2 years doesn't mean you have to stay together for old times sake. If he keeps leaving, this time you be the strong woman and walk away. Trust me, Honey, I know. I did it and I am much better for it. You may love him, but he obviously is not treating you the way you deserve to be treated and you need to cut your losses and get out.