Would you ever "Disown" a member of your family?
357795
I've done it. Make sure it's something you want to do because those people who disown for a year or two and then go back have a very very difficult time...more so than if you'd worked it out in the first place.\n\nbut sometimes it's the only choice, family is just genes doesnt make people good.
763007
Good question.  I "divorced" members of my family when they crossed the line with my children.  I haven't talked to my sister in 4 years.  And I don't miss her a bit.  \n\nYou need to decide what your limit is.  My limit was a family member harming my child.
1022225
It is terrible to have to do this to relatives & one can still be civil with them, but this does not mean that you have to tolerate abusive of any kind from them.  Our family has had to cut off someone because they refuse to change their negative behavior, or even acknowledge that they have a problem. I am afraid they will never realize it until they are cut off from absolutely everyone.
886196
Yeah, why not.  What could it hurt?  If they're estranged, they probably won't come and it will be on their conscience.
852059
My sister-in-law has a son who sever ties with her because he felt she didn't give him enough money which he feels is his inheritance!!! \n\nIf you are in this situation, let him go.
995789
i would try to reconcile but under your conditions. if you dont want to go to family get togethers and such then dont. explain that too them, if they cant accept it then at least you tried.
93567
the phrase "actions speak louder than words" comes to mind, I was once told that sometimes your own family can be your worst enemy, their are some mistakes that you will make in life that will be so bad that you can't fix them, all you can do is make amends, set things right as best you can and muddle your way on through, and that's life!!
629794
I could forgive them as I believe thats the only way to move forward, and then get rid of him and dont talk to her for a long, long time.Siblings should know better and that crossed the biggest line...
1157488
I would be probably saddened.  I would tell them that I love them no matter what.  Just because I don't agree with something , it doesn't mean that I dont have to support them.
153354
Whatever it was that made them disown you will surely dim as time passes. Give them time to cool off, do a lot of growing up yourself then you make the grand gesture yourself. It may take years, and pride will surely get in the way (on your part or theirs) but in the end having family means everything. Once you grow up and change your ways (if that is it) they will surely see the light.
652010
Sure, why not?  "If they ain't good nough fer kin, then they ain't good nough fer anybody".  Just joking.  I think that the thought of "trolling for a date" at a family reunion is sick.  I see nothing positive coming from the idea.  But, if you happen to be from a family whose family tree "doesn't fork", then this just might be the best idea that you've had in a while.\n\nSo, with that having been said, "pass the deviled eggs and a first cousin".
1034691
Well, your family is just being childish. If she is your friend and like a second mother to you then don't befriend her because your family as a problem with her. That's not fair to her and friends don't do that to each other. If I threw away friends because my family didn't like them I would be pretty much friendless. If your family are going to act that way towards anyone over something that was said so minor. Then your friend don't need them in her life. It will be their loss not hers. Good Luck!!!!
1171875
For one thing, I'd talk to the ex-in laws. They need to refuse to give in to her everytime she's not getting her way with you.
1135907
Never, blood is thicker than water. If you do you will regret it in a long run. family members will stick their neck out for you no matter what the situation. A friend will only go so far. FAMILY FIRST!!!!! Good luck hun
390299
Unfortunately, even though it is wrong to reject family members for that reason, it happens alot. But tell them anyways. Don't ever hide who you are! Don't ever feel like who you are is wrong because they do not agree or approve! You never know, they could be cool with it. You can not change who you are and if anyone, family member or not, can not except you, then it is better off that that person is no longer in your life. Good luck!
334182
if your family has a problem with him, you have to decide who your loyalty will go to. WHY does your family dislike him? Usually family disapproves of people they dont consider good enough for you..at least thats the case with my family.\nI would hesitate even if i loved someone. Giving up life as you know it, your family, everything for just one person is a huge step. I dont think i could do it without a committment of some sort.
970590
Oh I struggle with this constantly but for different reasons. My parents are addicts. There comes a time in life when you must concentarte on you. If those around you, particularily family have reached toxic levels where they are poisoning your own life, it's best to back off and distant yourself. I would not write them off entirely, I've thought about doing it myself, but it all comes back to they are family and we cannot choose our family and like them or not, through them we are here. I don't know how old you are, but if you are younger I would suggest possibly just distancing yourself and speaking up with the issues you disagree with and make certain they know that it hurts your feelings and do not entertain their ignorant remarks and actions by giving any other reaction other than telling them that at this point and time you do not agree with their opinions. If you are young, there could be possibly something else going on that they are actually concerned about that you aren't seeing just yet. However if it's purely based on race, I'd keep my feet planted in your beliefs and hopefully with time after you stay away from them for awhile they'll realize their love for you is stronger than their hate for another.  I wouldn't give your father any special treatment either, because he is encouraging everyone around him by not speaking up if he truly is aware of their issues and agrees with you. Sounds to me like your father may be ignorant as well, and only agrees with you in private for fear of losing his little girl. All you can do is stand strong in your beliefs, distance yourself from how involved with them you are, but I wouldn't write them out entirely. Now if they begin to do anything harmful that causes extreme physical or emotional grief then I would cut them off entirely. Hopefully with time though and your distance from each other they'll see that they were wrong and have second thoughts on their ideas and opinions, especially if the man you love becomes a true gem and treats you the way they always hoped a man you'd find would. Good luck though, racism is ugly and deeply rooted in those who are and often continues on in people out of their own fears. Just be thankful that somehow by the grace of God their ignorance didn't rub off on you as you were growing up, as if often sadly the case with those raised by parents with beliefs such as that. Enjoy the love you have found and ignore what they say. Find comfort with the one you love and through his family until and if yours ever comes around to their senses! God Bless you dear. Oh and pray for them because it sounds like they need it!!