More thoughts on a Preparation for  Godly Marriage?
360545
You would think you should start meeting people and getting ready.  Have faith, and don't be afraid to fall in love.  God's waiting for you both at the bottom.  You're joining together as one, working as one, creating as one a life, and a future that chances are, might hold a family.  It's perfectly okay to be married, as it is perfectly okay to be single.  God's timing is perfect, and His will is also.
206740
I would try to make it a huge memorable experience, it only happens once (hopefully)  Also, long engagements are great and I would definitely find a pre-marriage counselor to help you through issues you two do not even know you have yet.  Congratulations and best wishes on your happiness in life.
1096436
Here are a few ideas to ponder:\n\n1. God gave you sexual desires to help in your future marriage and ultimately to glorify Him. The desires aren't bad, but pointed in the wrong direction, as thoughts often are, they become sinful.\n\n2. Treat these desires like the habit of over-eating. The right kind of food is good in moderation, but when you binge or constantly crave food, it becomes your drug or even your god respectively.\n\n3. Think of the particular females who are currently the object of your lust as people who need your unselfish, godly love. Ask yourself what their greatest needs are, and minister to them. I wish I had done the same when I was in your stage in life (not long ago).\n\n4. Since the problem is bigger than you are, don't keep it a total secret. Confide in God and in a friend or two you can trust, who will hold you accountable.\n\n5. Don't just stop thinking about girls and sexual stuff. Replace these thoughts with godly thoughts. Carry around a stack of memory verses, for example.\n\n6. You're already so far ahead of most Christian men your age because even to strangers in this forum, you can express the problem honestly. Way to go, brother!
25276
If you just met him, first you have to pray and ask God if He is the right one and you have to get married then you can let him move with you since you are more established. remember you are not a cat or a dog you can't just move in with a man and start having babies. come on you can do better than that.
456556
If you're of age, 1 Corinthians 7 gives you a clear solution: get married.  If you go this route, TREAT YOUR WIFE RIGHT -- sacrificial love is the order of the day (Ephesians 5:22-33).  I'd also recommend Eggerichs' book _Love and Respect_; it will help you get started on the right foot.  Don't worry about finding "the right one" as though God hid your bride-to-be under a rock someplace.  If you need to get married, then find a woman who is (a) a believer, (b) devoted to the Lord, and (c) willing, and get hitched.  Get those three qualifications lined up, treat her right, and she'll take good care of you.  On the other hand, if a marriage of convenience scares you a little bit, then realize that curbing your problem is your only other option.\n\nNow for the tough part: discipline your mind.  If you're getting married, the two of you should study Song of Songs together.  Dillow, _Solomon on Sex_ and Fruchtenbaum, _Biblical Lovemaking_ are great resources for you -- buy them and use them.  Fill your head with biblical truth about sex.  Also, discipline your mind to think about YOUR WIFE when you think about sex.  Cultivate vivid memories of the mindblowing times you've had together.  When some pretty young lady showing too much skin crosses your path and you catch yoursef thinking, "Man I'd love to...," STOP.  Quote relevant Scripture to yourself, and remind yourself (by way of one of those juicy memories) of how God has provided for your sexual needs.  \n\nNow, if you're not getting married, you need to cultivate that kind of discipline anyway.  Just the details are fdifferent. Bad news: you can't resist this temptation on your own.  Clearly you already recognize this.  Good news: You don't have to.  Find the relevant passages in Scripture and keep them in the forefront of your mind -- always.  Write them down on 3x5 cards and carry them around with you.  When you're in line at the bank or the grocery store, take them out and read through them.  Memorize them and recite them to yourself as you drive to work (or walk the halls at school -- I don't know how old you are).  You need to never let yourself be unaware of the truth about that behavior.  Study what Scripture says about it.  You already know it's wrong, so go from there: what are the results of this particular sin?  What is the nature of the sin?  What leads to it?  How do you best avoid it?  What examples does Scripture give you -- who avoided this sin, and what happened?  Who gave in to it, and what happened?  I'd suggest paying particular attention to the writings of Solomon (Proverbs and Ecclesiastes, I mean -- stay away from Song of Songs until you're married, or about to be).  With 600 wives and 300 concubines, he got more than you've ever dreamed about.  Listen to the man -- he knows what he's talking about when he tells you that pleasing God is more important.\nBlessings on you, brother.  Keep the faith; the Lord can get you there.
551453
Yes I am presently engaged to my guy. We have been doing this for about a year. We put God first and then used our faith to keep us going. In two weeks I will be his wife, if I had to do it all over again I would not change a thing. We have our challenges but with computers, webcams, telephones the distance seem very short.
918482
READ MY ANSWER - ITS A REAL ONE:\nCongrats on making the step into a life long relationship with the King!\nFirst read Philippians 1.6 - it says this "being confidant of this, that he that began a good work in you (God), will carry it through to perfection on the day of Jesus Christ".\nThats a personal favourite of mine - it very clearly says that God Himself will take personal attention in making sure that you get closer to Him - even to the point of perfecting it on the day of Jesus Christ (the day that we see Him face to face).\nSo heres the first tip - take the pressure off - its a journey man.\nHeres the practical stuff:\n1. Get stuck into the Word of God - Joshua 1.8 says, get into that thing all the time - Joshua puts it like this "day and night". In this verse it says to meditate on the scriptures - this isnt in the eastern style of emptying your mind - in fact its the opposite! FILL your mind with God's word and chew on it until you get something out of it!\n2. Pray - lots. 1 Thess 5:17 says it like this - "Pray continually" .Not out of compulsion or duty but because you want to spend time with our great God. Open it up and get freestyle about it. Go for a walk in the morning and talk to God. \nNow - prayer is a two way thing - keep in mind that God wants to talk to you more than you need to talk to Him! So when you are praying take the time to listen to what He has to say to you too - trust me - give Him the chance and you won't believe what He wants to talk to you about - great things, the stuff that is on His mind!\n3. Fellowship - daggy word - great thing. This is simply hanging out with other christians. Hebrews 10:25 is Paul's recommendation to the Jewish church - he says - dont stop getting together. Get yourself into a church and surround yourself with good quality people who are now what you want to be like - you'll find yourself picking up the way they do things and catching their passion and the intimacy that they have with God will get into your life too! (Make sure its a church that is active in the community and grwoing on a weekly basis - this is an alive church that you can grow with and experience the nature and presence of God first hand)\n4. Serve. Do something for Him - contribute to building the Kingdom. Get real deep into serving the leaders and ministry of your local church and see your life expolde with joy and passion for the things of God.\n\nAND DON'T STOP - always just keep going. Thats my hottest tip - when it doesnt seem like anythings happening - don't stop - keep pushing, keep praying, keep reading. Remember a seed has to disapear into the ground before it can shoot up as a tree! there will be times where it doesnt seem like anything is happening - but keep 'watering the seed' and watch it grow.\n\nGod bless man - let me know how you go with this.
1013239
I understand. I don’t know what I’d do if I wasn’t married, but let me share some of the things I have learned in almost 20 years:\n\n1) Courtship is important. And long courtships are best. In our fast-paced world, especially as young adults, we are always rushing around. The best way to divorce-proof a marriage begins before you ever meet your mate-to-be, during the dating process. Serial dating, especially when it involves premarital sex, is a course in how to get divorced. We end up hooking up and then when things go sour we run away. Don’t get involved with someone who isn’t a friend. And date at least 2 – 3 years before getting married. That way you can get over the initial 18 month crush where everything about the other person is fascinating and the whole infatuated view of “The way you eat is so cute – it sounds like bells ringing,” to “If you clang your fork off of your teeth again I’m gojng to shove it through the back of your throat.” Not kidding – real conversation between my wife & I in the first year. I’m glad to say she never jammed the fork through my throat and I learned to use my lips as a cushion between my fork & teeth. \n\n2) Keep Christ at the center of your marriage. It seems obvious, but it is essential. Every time you notice that ring on your finger, pray for your spouse. It doesn't have to be long or even audible. Just a quick mental thanks to God for your mate, or a quick thought of, "God be with her/him." \n\n3) Love is NOT give and take. There is no take in love. Read 1 Cor. 13 (the love chapter). Love is giving. I give to my wife. She gives to me. If both are giving no one needs to take. Develop this mindset and remember that this is what marriage is meant for. Eph 5 takes a lot of heat for telling wives to submit to their husbands. But it also tells husbands to submit to their wives. Give + give = love. Give + take = selfishness = unhappy = divorce.\n\n4) Never use derogatory names for each other, even in fun. Husbands, if you call your wife "old lady" that is what you will see in her over time. I call my wife "my bride", especially when I am upset with her. That way I remember that wedding day, all those dreams, etc.\n\n5) When kids are involved it is easy to place them in front of your spouse. While time with kids is important & shouldn't be neglected, those kids will grow up & move out one day. Your mate will still be there and you'll need something else to talk about besides the kids. Make a habit of dating. Guys, even ask your wife out on a date. Arrange the babysitter. Often couples in church can provide a wonderful service for each other by trading Fridays (or whatever day is appropriate).\n\n6) Get to know and socialize with an older Christian couple or two who have a happy long-term marriage. Learn from how to treat each other from them. Remember that we all face similar adaptation issues when we are first married & they have worked those issues out. Talk with them about what they had to work out in either early married years and how they resolved things. This can be one of the biggest benefits you ever have, especially if you come from a divorced family or a family with strained relations.\n\n7) It may seem obvious but pray together. Have individual quite times, but have a shared quite time as well, at least once a week. And no matter how much you think it will hurt or bother your mate, talk. Holding it in doesn't make it go away - it only makes it fester until you explode all over each other. Talk and if agreement needs intervention, see your pastor or a Christian counselor.\n\nMarriage is very frightening - especially for those of us who came out of dysfunctional families. But the single biggest cause of dysfunction in my experience (and in my family) was selfishness. Give to each other & to the Lord, and you too can have a happy marriage. God bless you & best wishes!
435222
I don’t personally believe, based on my own Christian faith, that God has dictated everything in your life.  Bottom line is, you are a co-writer of the story God is telling through you.\n\nYou will have opportunities to become romantically involved with different people in your life, and you simply do not “know” ahead of time what you are “supposed” to do. You might feel safer if God simply dictated every little step to you, but He won’t do that. You are not a robot, you are gloriously alive and part of the story yourself. That is scary, but it should also be exhilarating. (You have a say!)\n\nYou might end up picking someone who is similar to you, and marriage will be easy to make work -- but you won't be very challenged. Or you might end up picking someone with whom marriage is very difficult at first, but God still can make the marriage work and deepen as beautifully as the first option.\n\nMeanwhile, God wants you to be faithful to him in whatever you do. Act as He would have you in this relationship and see where it goes. If the relationship deepens (you grow to care about each other, your faith is leading you both in the same direction, and so on), let it deepen and see what happens. \n\nPray about it, pray for your romantic partner, focus on long-term growth and ask God for direction. Ask older wiser folks you trust for their opinions.\n\nMeanwhile, enjoy the friendship that is flowering. The abundant life (and by that I meant the spiritually fulfilling one, not the hedonistic pleasure-at-all-cost one) is meant to be lived and experienced.\n\nDon’t focus on whether or not you are “making a mistake” by perhaps not picking the earmarked person from the pool of 6 billion, that’s a fearful way to live. Focus on what God is doing in you and this person right now while you’re together, learn from it, and go where it takes you.
967088
Hey, you have my name!  J/K, glad to see another believer has my name at least.  My thoughts and prayers for you are that you truly seek God's face during this time.  Getting married will not solve your fiance's situation.  In fact, it might compound it with the newness of marriage and everything sexual involved with it.  I commend him for his want to overcome his situation, and I truly believe he needs to seek Godly counseling through the pastor or another strong believer with experience in these areas.  You, also, should attend counseling.  Don't let co-dependency conform you to "accepting" his addiction because your love is all powerful.  It can happen and that I believe is not God's will.  We should love God first, and our spouse second.  In this be on your face seeking God's will for your life.  Another thing for your fiance to keep in mind is that he doesn't have to prove anything to God, God knows every hair on our heads, I would think he knows what is in the depths of each of our hearts too.  He really has to live a different life daily and dissociate himself from everything to date that has caused his situation.  Counseling, support and accountability are what he needs big time.  Prayers and love =)
755716
I am VERY serious about getting married someday...I want to save myself for my husband and have a family. I also want to be a doctor. I believe God has a plan for me and will work all this out.
479767
When it feels like it would be the logical next step.\nAsk yourself the following questions....\n\n1. Do we love, trust and respect each other?\n2. Do we share the same expectations of marriage? \n3. Do we share things in common that make us shout, cry and laugh? \n4. Do we agree on major life issues, such as children, family and friends, where we'll live and style of living? \n5. Do we have a way of managing conflict? \n6. Do we share the same views on infidelity and commitment to avoiding temptation? \n7. Do we love each other just the way we are today, without any hidden agenda to try to change the other?\nYou don't have to agree on everything. The important thing is that you and your partner have talked through these questions and both feel confident you can live and work together, knowing what the other believes
1176824
Personally I think you should have sex before marriage and live with the person. Marriage is forever you need to know if you can stand that person and their ways, all their ways. Now my religion says another but I listen to my instinct first.
898639
God says to "be fruitful & multiply." I honestly do not remember seeing  ANYWHERE in the Bible that you have to be married 1st. The only thing I recall is that we are supposed to be monogamous & commit ourselves to our mate until death. Does that mean that we have to be married in the conventional sense? I don't know. Maybe this whole formal marriage thing was put in place to deepen the commitment.
906977
I am a christian and I am waiting til marriage 23 years so far.  I have a lot of friends that are also waiting.  It makes sense on then just a religious plane though.
1184610
Stay strong in God's Word.  The very fact that you are concerned and asking about this is His sign to you that it is not right.  He will lead you to your heart's desire.  When you get married you will find that waiting was THE best thing to do and the RIGHT thing to do and you will have NO REGRETS.  Stay strong and stand firm and you will be blessed.
607902
Yes, you can. You are married in the eyes of God and not living in sin. \n\nAsk a priest if you need more assurance.\n\nWith love in Christ.