I am a married Baptist. I am in love with a married Catholic. How can we ever marry yet stay Catholic?
371950
You are both married? To other people?! Are you cheating on your spouses? \n\nIf not I'm going to guess that you are married to each other or plan on marrying each other? \n\nAs far as the religions go....WOW....That's a tough one. Both are hard core and will want you to convert so one is going to have to make up their mind. If you don't want to convert you need to explain to your significant other that it's not an option and if they don't understand oh well. I love my husband but if he told me that he had converted to Catholisism and that I had to convert or else I would tell him sorry. First people you love should ask you to go against your faith and secondly no man or woman on this earth should be more important to you than God. If you believe that all you have to do is ask forgivness and that you shall recieve redemption then certain other beliefs are going to stick in your craw anyways. But hey, it's up to you...\n\n(p.s. Before I start getting hate mail folks please keep in mind that I don't dislike or hate Catholics at all nor am I anti-Catholic in any way. All the Catholics I know are cool people. The only point I'm trying to stress is that someone who is a hard core Baptist (enough to put that title in with a question, which means it's important to them) is going to have problems with the Catholic faith in general and vice versa. Wether or not he is able to get an annulment I'm not sure it wouldn't work anyhow if one person or the other is forced to convert.)
923070
Yes I agree. You can be a Catholic as well as being a Christian.I believe in God and I am Catholic and Christian
827454
I'm a white Christian and I married a black Christian. It's all about the love man. I was least likely to date an atheist ( regardless of race) because for a long lasting relationship, you should see eye to eye on religion. Everything isn't so black and white (pardon the pun)
517697
yes, i have known about this for some time, i am a baptist, and have very close freinds that are cathliocs, i know there is some small diffrences, but for the most part we beleve the same things. it has been hard for me because so many of my freinds on the baptist side are very much aganst cathliocs, but i have cathlioc freinds that are closer than my baptist freinds. so i think you for posting this.
668632
if you think of it that way, realize that your not following your heart, how God wants you, but your following this thing called the bible, the church, its RULES.\n\nim catholic, very religious, im not the type who attends church every single sunday, but i pray every night before going to bed and daily i keep my mind set in the faith i have in God. im 23 and i live here abroad with my bf of 4 years. all the issues of sex before marriage i never believed it but i did keep my restrictions well set. meaning i never went around having sex different guys thinking every time 'oh! he is the love of my life!' thats just crap people think every time they see a guy they like and i thank god i never fell for that trap. i always kept my virginity even after having a 2 year bf in the past. \n\nwhen you know its right, when the moment is ok, you let it go and it doesnt matter whether your getting married or not, you just  have to know it when you are ready and God WILL be happy for you because you were following your heart.\n\nill tell you something wierd that happened to me after the first day i had it. yes it was with the bf iam still happily together with today. it had happened, we were all ok, just kinda wierd since it was our first time for the both of us. the next morning it was a sunday and we went for a walk in the center of florence (im studying abroad in florence, italy) as we noticed there was this little cute church hidden in one corner, we went inside and realized there was a mass just starting, so we decided to stay and attend it. (he is also a catholic). you know how in every mass there is a subject to talk about, so as we sat there to listen, we realized that the priest began talking about sex. yes pure, love, sex. he began to talk about love and how people shouldnt be restrained to show their love to others truthfully and that sex is OK ASLONG as you know 100% what you are doing. i rememeber the priest got the bible and dropped it on the floor, i was like, what does he mean??? (i didnt understand the italian that well but my bf told me) the priest had said that bible isnt the rule of thumb that everyone should follow, that in this situation it is the issue of YOU and GOD not YOU and the BIBLE. \n\nthats not all, so as the priest kept on talking about sex and love, he comfessed one thing that shocked me. he told us that in the past when he was young (at the time he looked over 60) he was actually as he stated that day, a 'playboy'. im seriouly not kidding, he told us his story of how he was a wild guy, how he went from one women to another not giving a damn about life. i dont want to get to the issue of how he brought himself to become a priest, but it was a real interesting point of view.\n\nso we left the mass that day really really 'moved'. it was like God told me that day, 'Gaby you did the right thing, you did it from your heart, you have waited this long, and you shouldnt be ashamed of it, i love you and i am happy for you.'\n\nanyways, i hope my experience helps ya and makes you think of it from a different point of view.
46776
I am a christian and it is not a sin to remarry because give someone he knows will love you for who you are. Although It did not work the first time. God is there to help you and bless you with someone who can love you as much as he do. but make sure the next is your last. make sure in your heart, mind and soul that you both are in love with each other and God himself.
332022
Do you believe in ALL parts of the Catholic religion? Do you follow all the beliefs of the Catholic religion? If so, then stay in your marriage. If you have doubts about some of the old fashioned ideas in your religion and do not wish to remain in a marriage where neither one of you could be happy, then get a divorce and move on with your life. If there are children involved, then it is unfair to them to live together just for the sake of the religion. They deserve happy parents, not ones that stay together for the wrong reasons. I wouldn't want to teach my children that no matter how bad their marriage is, they should stay because of their religion's belief. That would set them up to remain in an abusive marriage and possibly end up hurt or killed. I personally do not believe that the Lord would want me to live a lie and stay with a person that I was no longer in love with. I think he realizes that we make mistakes and I think he would be fine with us finding a remedy for our mistakes. If however you think that there is a chance to get back the feelings you had for your wife, then I would first work on fixing the problem. Maybe trying counseling either through your church or through a marriage counselor. I think that trying to work it out, unless the reasons for your changed feelings cannot be resolved, is the best thing to try first. I believe the Lord wants us to be happy, so do what you need to do to be happy!\n\nS.S.
608706
First of all, any sin can be forgiven, with the exception of final despair ( that would be, say, you are killing yourself and right up until your very last thought, you believe God doesn't love you and you have no regrets about what you are doing)\n\nWe Catholics have the Sacrament of Reconciliation (Confession)to bring our relationship with God back in line with where it should be when we have sinned. Don't let anyone fool you- it isn't easy. It is NOT ," Oh, Catholics think they can do ANYTHING, then go to Confession." WRONG. If you do it right, the point is it is really HARD to confess the things you do that disappoint God (we are not talking to the priest in Confession, we are talking to God- the priest speaks on His behalf). When you walk out of the Confessional, knowing your soul is as pure as on the day of your Baptism- THAT is the most AWESOME feeling!\n\nSo, again, almost any sin can be forgiven. You must be sorry for doing it and truly want to avoid that sin forever, take it to God in Confession...and He forgets it forever!\n\nMost people's moral faults are not known to the world, so rarely would that keep them from being able to be married in the Church. \n\nHaving said that, Matrimony is a Sarament for Catholics- that is why Catholic weddings are so ceremonius and include Mass whenever possible. If a couple enters into marriage while in a state of sin ( not having been to Confession as soon as possible prior to the wedding) they are not allowing themselves to be as open to the grace of the Sacrament as possible.\n\nDivorce is not a sin, but Jesus said marriage is permanent- so REMARRYING after divorce IS a sin. It is adultery. An annulment is a declaration after investigation that a marriage was not Sacramental in nature, therefore did not really 'take.' \n\nThe amount requested by the Diocese for an annulment is a FRACTION of the true cost, and no one is required to pay if they cannot afford it. It is emotionally difficult, but there is a reason. You are supposed to learn something from the process to help you keep your next marriage together. Were you too immature to choose a life mate? Did you fail to think of your spouse moe than yourself? What did you do right and what did you do wrong.  The reason family and friends are questiopned is because they watched your marriage fall apart- only they didn't say anything to you so you could try to keep it together. They offer third party insight and confirmation of what happened, just like in any court case.\n\nIf you want to learn more about the Catholic Church, I recommend 2 books:\n\nThe Catechism of the Catholic Church and Catholicism for Dummies.
979528
It is not Christian marriage we are fighting over it is civil marriage.\n\nI can already get married in my church and that's great....just doesn't carry any legal weight.
519689
Yes Catholics are Christian, but not all Christians are Catholic.  In order to be married in the Catholic Church,  you both must be Catholic.  Go talk to your priest.  He will clear things up for you, and tell you about how your fiance can go about converting, if he wants to.
1133851
It pains me to read this, that a man would do this to two women he loves. I pray for all involved. I'm a Catholic, deeply believing in marriage and its sanctity.\n\nYou have many questions. I"ll try to tackle them organizedly.\n\nI think, more important than a discussion of the sin, is the damage that is being done to the spouse and to the family and to him and to the OW. Those who say sin has no consequences beyond the sinner are sadly mistaken. We can talk about what the sin means and where there was sin and what punishment is merited later. Right now what matters is for him to cease in this sinful way.\n\nIt is true that the Blood of Christ means forgiveness; but HE HAS TO STOP SEEING HER in order to really and truly accept that forgiveness. Catholics seek this through Penance, non-Catholics through direct prayer or accountability groups or whatever practice they have interpreted to be correct.\n\nAll Sins are against God alone, but there are sins (small s) against several people here:\nHe is sinning against the spouse for very obvious reasons; "love, but not in love" is not a good enough reason to be unfaithful.\nHe is sinning against his family.\nHe is sinning against the OW by not loving her (love is a choice, very true).\nHe is sinning against the community by breaking his marriage vows.\n\nFirst, where is there Sin? There is Sin in the extramarital affair on its own - and this sort of Sin begins in the heart; he doesn't love the OW by choice, so the love is not in the heart, and that is the Sin of lust. There is Sin in being unfaithful in marriage, and I consider this to be the worst because it is breaking the marriage vows. I think the Church would consider breaking the vows the most grave Sin. I can go on and on, but the case is made.\n\nThe punishment for Sin is death; he may feel guilty, he may wish to repent, but it cannot be a sincere repentance until he stops seeing the OW and gives his heart time to forget her. The Sin and sins end at this point because:\n\nThe marriage has the chance to be made whole.\nThe hurt stops being piled upon the spouse.\nThe lust of his body ends.\nThe lust of his heart will fade.\nThe family has stopped being rent and can begin to heal.\nThe community sees that the vow is again being honored.\n\nIf he is not truly sorry for his Sin, whether he stops or not, this is for the Lord to know. The Lord may condemn him, the Lord may complete the good work begun in him (per Phillippians) and eventually admit him to Eternal Life, as the Lord may do to all of us. But to persist in unrepented sin is a grave decision.
539051
That would make you unequally yolked, and I don't believe God intends for you to marry someone who isn't a Christian.\n\n*EDIT*\n\nIf you two are deeply in love, then if she is the one, she will get saved.  If not, then she's not the one for you, and you should ask God for help with moving on.
671668
Why in this world would you two ever marry?  You two will self destruct in a very short time if you marry.  A christian should never marry a non christian.  It just makes the whole marriage very difficult, if not impossible.  You should tell him everything that you think BEFORE you ever marry.  He can not OK or deny you to go to hell, you will go there no matter what he believes, but for your own belief.  I think you are just looking for problems dating this person.
1073578
It does not make sense for a Muslim to marry a Christian or for a christian to marry a Muslim unless they weren't really serious about their  religion.  I am Catholic and I feel very strongly about my ideals.  There is no way I would marry a Muslim because as it says in one of the gospels, we would be "unevenly yoked" and arguing about religion all the time.  I mean, what would we teach our kids?  Both religions?  And which one would I tell him is the truth?  Mine or his father's.  It is better to find someone who feels the same way you do on matters that are close to your heart so you can work as a team.
777614
Why get married AT ALL if it's not something you want?  People take a leap into Nothing when getting married.  By that I mean only their Faith and Trust holds the bond connected.  \n\nHumans have Free Will; and that comes with the responsibility to do what's right, including NOT getting married.  If the notion of awakening next to the same person for YEARS until death parts you from them is not in your heart, then DON'T GET MARRIED!\n\nDon't go in with a doubt, or without counseling.  There are courses for people seeking marriage in the Catholic church just for the fact that they don't know what they're gonna feel later and why.  The marriage must be a faith-based union, meaning you're  going to church together, spiritually awake to one another, and emotionally aware of what's happening.\n\n"So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." - Matthew 19:6\n\nMy wife knows my vanity and self-centeredness, and also knows ALL my support and love are with her.  Despite my flaws she also wanted to marry me, and has forgiven my numerous chaotic and emotional misgivings.  We have been married 4 years, dated for 6 including 3 years she was at college out-of-town.\n\nI hope you find a spouse as loving & giving as I have.\n\nGood luck & God Bless!\n\n\nJaime
378437
Well, i think that when there are different faiths involved both spouses have to be open minded and they have to communicate with each other about their different religions/ faith. I am not married but i am in a relationship where we both have different religions. We talk about it and we try to know or to learn about the different religion. Mostly because of curiosity but also b/c we have to set boundaries. So if you talk to them and make sure they know how you feel then it'll be alright, but also as long you each of you do not try to impose their religion on each other. Just be open minded and talk about it.
830548
My husband and I are atheists. He told me about his position before we married and I accepted it. I was an atheist in every way but by name, and just decided that I am what I am; I've been happy with the decision ever since.\n\nThat said, the argument they give about dating outside of their faith is almost the same one used by those who oppose gay marriage. They somehow believe that gay marriage is a threat to heterosexual marriage. My husband and I have discussed this before; our feeling is, if our marriage is somehow threatened by Bob and Dave's marriage, then we have other problems. Our marriage is our marriage; the only threat to our marriage would be a lack of love, respect or communication with the other. That's our problem, not something Bob and Dave created.\n\nIf you are strong in your beliefs, whatever they are, you rise to the challenge to defend them. Your faith (whether in God or in yourself) should not be shaken by association with those who believe differently than you. If anything, it should bolster your confidence to go out into the world. \n\nYour friend believes that all she does is based on faith at its very foundation. Frankly, she may be feeling very conflicted because you are a decent, trusting, and honorable person on your own - without having the guilt of religion as a motivator to be these things. In her mind, and that of her friends, you can't have those qualities without faith. Your relationship with her proves that you can; it's a threat to what she believes, and on some level she may be questioning her faith. You are not asking her to give up her faith. You are treating her with kindness, respect and are offering the prospect of being in a loving relationship. You have not shunned her friends because they are Christians, you embrace them as cool people who just happen to believe differently. \n\nI don't know what to tell you other than you seize opportunities when they're presented to you. I hope she at least considers how wonderful dating could be for the both of you. The only way you're going to know is to jump in and see what happens. If it goes well, you will approach any hurdles your differences present from a standpoint of love and respect. If it doesn't work, you will have given it an effort, and time will heal whatever heartbreak occurs.\n\nYou can't know how it's going to work without giving it a chance.