DIVORCE FOR FREEDOM, is it worth?
362119
hi caddy ;I've read your other questions,\n First piece of advice You have to be careful.\n(All the way around)\nThis guy long distance over the internet \n"He is not your Answer". \nYou  do realize he  can be anything he wants to be, anything you need him to be.\nWhich is supportive ,understanding ,romantic., \nNow you're having trouble getting hold of him, I take it you have let him know you want to meet up with him. That could be a sign right there he is in it for the no strings attach fun line dating.\n\nYou have set your self in motion for an emotional affair since your husband is a bully and a control freak so your looking for the love you are not getting from your husband.\n\nYou know  Your husband can easily track your internet connections by going to history. I don't want you to endanger yourself since you say he has a temper.\n\n I say deal with getting out of your marriage for your freedom if all is hopeless and you feel unsafe mentally ,emotionally physically it is yes worth it.\n But don't trade him in for a long distance dream cause you know those  can just turn a bad situation into a nightmare.\n\nI belive you are not ready for this long distance relationship.\nBut you may be ready for divorce since you have the thought you are half way there.\nGL:\n\nMy husband and I divorced over religious differences.  He thought he was God, and I didn't.  ~Author Unknown
1050776
(A friend huh? )  Why is it that when ever someone on this site wants a "quickie divorce",or wants to break up with someone,the first thing they say is: "It's not me-it's for a friend?"\n\n(1) First of all,why waste your time trying to get answers to your friends problems? Is he/she not capable of taking care of this him/herself?\n( 2) Do you think people on this site are able to determine why this marriage should end,without details?\n(3) Stop Lying!-Your the one who wants the " Quicky divorce" (wink,wink!). You probably got married just as quick,and as a matter of fact,you probably do "everything" quick (wink,wink). (Anyway) stop trying to do everything so "Quickly". Pay the cost to end the marriage,or prove to the Lawyers,that YOUR WIFE is capable of footing the bill!. \n\n(PS) Just to let you know,there is no such thing as "breaking away clean",from a divorce. Everyone will pay,suffer,or whatever in the long run. Don't forget about Alimony,and paying any bills she has accumulated over the years. Good thing there's no kids involved. (Good luck)
1128050
If you been separated for a year, go for it. Best of luck.
524160
Welcome to the world of "my life now officially sucks."  I'm a California divorce lawyer.  I am going through my own divorce.  I am representing myself.  The process sucks even for me.  While I am grateful that I have the skills and ability to represent myself I have absolutely no idea how anybody else could possibly do it.\n\nIf you are dead-set on representing yourself (and I can't say I blame you -- it is very expensive to hire a lawyer) then you need to start doing your research now.  Check your local county courts and see if they have any free legal clinics.  Many do.  If you're in California, most counties have a Family Law Facillitator's Office that might be able to give you some guidance.\n\nOther than that, go to your local bookstore and check out books on divorce.  There is a mountain of information out there.  It's very difficult to get your head around it depending on the complexity of your marital estate.\n\nIn the meantime, go find yourself a lawyer at www.martindale.com.  Find one that will give you a free consultation.  Many have flexible fee plans and creative financing.  Who knows, getting a lawyer may actually save you money in that a lawyer might be able to get more out of your divorce than you could have.  Ultimately, the decision to hire or not hire a lawyer is entirely yours.  But I highly suggest you consult one just so that you have all the information in front of you when making this very important decision.
290278
it depends on what kind of divorce, if its an uncontested divorce you can actually do it yourself and all you have to pay is the court fees you can find papers on the Internet as well they usually cost around 40 dollars i helped my friend do his own divorce and Ive done my own for under 300, good luck and best wishes during a hard time.
308556
divorce and break up!!
1075699
You never know if it's the right choice.  I think you know that it's what you want when you decide that you have to save yourself from the situation your in.  As long as you think you can keep living the way you are or think things can be salvaged then you don't to be divorced.  If things are bad enough that you say no more & you want to start living your own life again...then it's time.
11989
It really depends on whether you have a helpful, concerned family around and some close friendships. \n\nIt's also a consideration if you have work skills or not. Your standard of living usually goes down with a divorce so you may need to take some classes and find a career that will interest and support you and your children.\n\nIt can be an exhilerating thing to walk out of an abusive marriage and go out on your own without fear.  Making preparations before leaving will be a good thing in the long run. \n\nPerhaps, you would want to ask him to visit a marriage counselor with you a few times before deciding absolutely.  Of course it's best for children to grow up with their own parents - but if he won't try to change and continues to be abusive, you must go.\n\nFor the unprepared and those without family ties, it can be extremely hard.  It's difficult to make ends meet on low wages.  It's difficult to have to pay a babysitter every time you go anyplace...and it's lonely at times.\n\nYou can weigh out the pros and cons for yourself but please do not stay in a marriage where you are abused.\n\nI wish you the best of luck.
634137
No definitley stay with this guy! He's obviously a great catch and all those other people are just jealous cuz you got him and they didnt. Also dont worry about a pre-nup I'm certain he's trustworthy!\n\nThe fact that I am a divorce attorney and a Democrat has in no way biased my answer.
1115322
I divorced through an on line service.  I recommend it only if you and your ex can negotiate a settlement amicably.  If there is any disagreement on the division of assets or parenting and custody plans then it is better to use a mediation service or lawyers.  We were able to work it all out and it did not take much time and we did not have to go to court.  The cost as I recall was about $400.  My state is a no fault state.  I don't know about yours.
530265
This doesn't make any sense why divorce when it could cost you? Maybe I am misunderstanding the question but I believe no man would want to do that. Honest
1084455
I always thought yearly renewable contracts would be better.  I have to disagree with you about the hassle and expense.  I was married for 18 years.  The divorce cost me less than $500 and was complete in 6 mos.  No big deal.
914367
Mixed emotion, clouded mind, dark roads, all can seem a bit scary. But did you know that you hold the key to your new tomorrow? In your own hands you hold your life and the life of your kids. You also have the keys, flash light and map for your tomorrow.\n\nAfter the divorce you are given new powers to re-write your life story and tell it to the world how you want it to be heard. Divorce will bring you freedom. You are free to move on. Do not be like the elephant on a chain. A trained elephant has been chained and conditioned to only move about (by the limitations of the chain). Once the chain is taken off, the elephant does not run free because they have convinced them self that they are  still chained up. Do not let your past haunt you like this. You are a free woman. Get up and move about and explore the world you have been dying to see.\n\nThink not of yesterday or the what could have been, learn to live in the moment of today. Embrace your new freedom.
61242
I think that you're the only person that can decide that.  You should sit down and write down what you want, what's wrong, how to solve it, and what is neccessary to solve the problem(s), what is at stake (kids, your happiness).  Clear your thoughts and make a decision when you are ready.\n\nDon't read books on topics such as "Is Divorce for you?"  "When should I get a divorce?"  "Is my marriage down the drain?"  "Stay for the kids?"\nOr anything similar.\nI don't think reading those type of books will help because when reading it you'll think "yeah, yeah, that sounds good" and be influenced by them instead of looking at yourself more clearly.\n\nBest of luck.
365432
I'm in a similar situation with 3 kids (2,5,7).  At first I thought it would be better to be with a never-married single w/o kids; now I feel that it's better to be with a divorced man with or without kids because of the similar understanding and bad experience of divorce as well as the willingness and commitment to NEVER be divorced again, especially if someone has kids, there are too many people's lives our decisions are affecting.  I also need answers...thanks for asking and good luck!
123807
It depends why are you divorced in the first place? If you still love her and want her back go for it.
200274
bad idea. you need to provide far more info. is custody something you agreed to? have you determined how the situation will be handled if one of you changes your mind? how about if the circumstances change? \nthose are your children (or somebody's children). i know it is costly but if anything in the world is worth spending that money, its your kids.