emotionally abusive husband, and threatens bodily harm how can I prove?
371172
yes, Record him him with a voice activated recorder and /or hidden video camera.
441657
He was right to be hurt. Right to worry and be worried sick. He was right to be angry because you completely blew off his fears and hell he would go through if you went missing for so long without checking in. However...he DID NOT have a right to hit you. This isn't the 1940's when women thought they have physical abuse coming for something they did. You need to understand that no physical violence is "acceptable" no matter how bad you screwed up. MY soon to be ex wife cheated on me with a man and then a woman while I was in Iraq. I didn't touch her. I may not have respected her as my "wife" but she's still the mother of my children. Give him some time to think this through. Be there at the house like you normally are. Do all the things you usually do like dinner, the kids....\nShow him you want this life with him. It'll help him see what he has and what he could lose unless he realizes what you mean to him. When he's calmed down he'll want to know more. He'll ask again to see if the story changes. Keep to the truth no matter how it might look. He needs to understand you will not put up with physical abuse ever again. Good luck and I hope you two can fix this.  Compared to the reasons for my divorce, yours are easy to repair with love, faith, trust and friendship.
273278
walked away until you both calmed down . . . \n\nIf he wanted to . . . legally he could call the police and have you arrested for domestic violence . . . that is all he needs . . . to charge you . . . \n\nWhy else do you think . . . you hear more reports of women charging men . . . because women press charges on these stupid fights . . . and men ignore them.\n\nVAWA (Violence Against Women Assn) . . . did a report . . . and it shows that men are the biggest victim of domestic assault . . . second is children . . . third is women.  The biggest abusers . . . first is women . . . second is men . . . third is other relations (Like babysitter, aunt, uncle).\n\nYou should be glad you husband was a nice guy . . . and didn't have you arrested.
861288
well a hard question, but if you have tried everything and talked to your husband about how you feel and he wont change then its time to end it.\nbe careful the fact that he digrades you and belittles you publicly is often the early signs of an abusive man. he is on a power trip and whats you to feel bad about yourself and make you think everything that happens to go wrong is your fault. once he gets you comfortablw with the he may get physically abusive to you. or else he may threaten to or actually harm your children. \nbe careful and make a plan for your exit. once you make up your mind you need to follow through and leave and don't ever look back\nif you want to talk to someone you can email me. ive been there and im out now.
438349
Well, it would be nice if you told us what these things are, because without knowing what he's saying, how would anybody know if they are considered a crime or a threat?\n\nAlso need to know what state you're in, since laws differ from state to state.\n\nChances are, at least here in California, cruel and demeaning things would not qualify as domestic abuse.  But again, it's impossible for anyone to tell you specifically without knowing what's being said and where you are.\n\nEDIT 4.27.06\n\nYou still didn't say what state you're in.  Based on the additional information you posted tonight, if you were in California, poking you in the chest with his fingers would be a crime, and possibly telling you he was going to throw you out a window would be a crime.\n\nThe thing is, whether these things are crimes or not is not really the issue.  The issue is that your husband is abusing you in one or more forms.  You've also added tonight that you have children, so you're not the only victim here.  He may not touch the children, but he (and you, I'm sorry to say) are exposing the children to domestic abuse...I won't go into all the studies that have been done on children who are exposed to the kinds of stuff you're talking about but trust me, it will screw a kid up.  For that reason, California Child Protective agencies have started removing children from homes where domestic abuse is taking place, even if the children are not directly victims.\n\nI've seen a lot of domestic violence cases...more than would fill a lifetime.  And the things they all have in common is that they start out small, get gradually bigger, and eventually will end up in your death if something does not change.  I'm guessing he does these things, then apologizes, then things are fine for a while, then it happens again?  And when it happens again, it's maybe just a little bit worse...he calls you worse names, pushes you just a little more, etc?  Domestic violence has a really predictable cycle and I just described it for you.   \n\nGet out.  Do not wait, do not assume he will get better, do not think you can't make it (of course, he obviously wants you to think that, because then you won't leave and he will continue to have a victim), do not expose yourself and your children to this man any longer than it takes to pack.  I guarantee there is a domestic violence organization somewhere near you that will be more than willing to help you...800-799-SAFE is a start.\n\nI *promise* you...if something does not make him change, he will not.  People don't change without some reason, and you staying there is not going to be the reason.
510937
They do that because they know you will cry. So you have to turn the tables on them. Gird up the woman power and tell\nthem to back off. Put some sterness in your voice. Don't\nback down. You see they think you are weak and a wimp. But \nyou can prove them wrong. When your husband does that just\nlaugh it off, make a joke about it, or ignore it. As for the\nson he is out of line and he need to stay in a child's place. You need to take his prize possession from him. Ground him until he learns to respect you and obey you. You have got to take a stand and let them know you are not going to put up with their crap no more. That is your house too and you need to take control. Let them see the ugly side of you. That'll scare them.
1047167
You said this just started and for no apparent reason. Maybe it is just that you have no clue to the reasoning behind it. I am not saying he is justified in treating you like crap or doing things in front of the children that he shouldn't but there has to be a reason for it. Have you tried asking him what is going on. Maybe something has happened and for what ever reason he can't or doesn't know how to share this with you so in turn his actions is a result of what ever is really bothering him. You have made it clear you won't put up with this so stress this to him again that if he can't share with you what is going on you can't try to help him with it but that he isn't going to take it out on you either. He needs to make the choice as to what to do and then you can choose what to do based on how he feels. I really feel for you hun as something happened to my ex husband and he thought he would become physical with me until I told him he would die before he hit me again and of course the final results was I left. I couldn't fix something that I had no clue as to what was going on and I was not going to be hit on or abused in any other way either. I hope he comes around before you leave him but do what is best for you and the children hun!!.
1009335
well if she just got the order it probaly an emergency order. he should recieve his day in court in about a week.however these usually are civil matter which means she may have got the judge to grant her this on emotional abuse sounds like he doesn't need her anyway .However make sure he does not contact her in any way she can prove. in ohio the first time you violate it you can recieve 180 days second time it turns into a felony. so what state do you live in ?e-mail me if you like I actually have a cpo against someone and know a little bit about this stuff. What she has done is really cruel and ultimately makes it harder for people who really needs protection.
216861
I know not the laws of India but would assume you contact your local police, as anywhere else. I'm curious as to why you're so concerned about "exposing" yourself, however. Do you feel personally threatened? Are the police likely to name you as the complainant? Can you not make the complaint anonymously?\n\nYou must do as you think best, of course, and it's easy for me to sit here and advise you. But sometimes in life we have to stand and be counted, do we not? In this instance, who is looking out for the safety and welfare of the battered wife? It is clear by your question that this abuse is troubling you. Please act!
871176
Recommend you see a professional marital counselor first, and a divorce lawyer, and "get your ducks in a row".\n\nI would recommend you do that as soon as you possibly can because your situation at home is not something a woman should be involved in.\n\nAs a nuetral third party observer I assume I'm one of many who have told you leave your abusive husband.\n\nI'm not familiar with the psychology of what you are going through and I understand from the few articles I have read you might be undergoing some sort of dependence or whatever. There are halfway houses or whatever, there are enough mechanisms society has put in place for these types of situations.
397885
If you love him enough to put up with physical violence then you are the one who needs help. You shouldn't leave your spouse because they become mentally ill, but you should the day he started slapping you. Also, if he doesn't want to take an active part in his treatment and recovery(ie taking his medicine on his own) then you should definitely leave him because he doesn't love you enough to want to stop hurting you. I am mentally ill and I am all for helping and understanding people with these illnesses, but violence is not accaptable.
153004
If you can see the abuse on your son's body, take him to the doctor immediately....NOW, PRONTO...the doctor will see if and he/she HAS to report the abuse by law. Take photos and document when and where it happened. Also, your son is getting emotionally abused no doubt. Don't let this pass. Also contact an attorney who is knowledgable in family/children's rights. Your job as a Mom, as you know, is to protect your children at all costs. Your husband's visitation should be taken away from him or at least, he needs to go to an anger management class ordered by the court plus only have supervised visitation. I am so sorry this is happening to your child. NO CHILD deserves to be abused EVER!
372263
First write down all the facts (not feelings) as they pertain to the situation.\n\nThen meet with a local attorney.\n\nDon't make verbal or written threats.\n\nGood luck.
97141
First question are you being phsyicaly abused? if so you should like you need to ask yourself is do you want to stay in this. If you do you only asking for what is being handed too you. If you want to get out of it what you should do is seek a lawyer. if you can't afford it then seek Legal aid they can help you for a small fee or no cost. Some states sence he if he is phsycaly abusive you might be able to seek a court order for him to be exparte from the resendence and also request that Tempory Spoucal support be paid till the divorce is over. You can also in some states seek what is called a bed and board divorce. This means you get the marrial resendence. I would HIGHLY reocmmend if he is physicaly abusive to you contact a lawyer ASAP! If this is a problem you can file it down at the court house. And seek consoling as no women or man should ever have to put up with phsycal abuse.
724262
He is just trying to make you take the blame for his behavior.  That is how abusive men work and make you think it is all your fault.  He obviously does not care about you that much if he just up and leaves and puts all the blame on you.  You are better off leaving him and getting your kids away from a man like that.  They will either be abusers or take abuse from someone else.  He walks all over you and guess what, your kids will to as long as you keep them in that environment.  Your husband is a horrible role model and so are you for putting up with him.  You can't save your marriage because he does not respect you enough to stick around and work things out.  GET OUT NOW!!  I pray that you will take people's advice and put you and your children first.  I get mad at my husband all time but he does not treat me they way your man does.  Think about all the healthy relationships you know of and compare yours to them.
631226
Leave him, chances are you will be next This is how alot of domestice violence begins. \n\nBut call a family member and plan it ahead of time.
640624
You need to leave, NOW!  He is going to blow at one point and if he doesn't kill you, or someone else, he is going to hurt you bad!  If he has ever hit you, he will again...and harder!  He is already verbally abusing you, mental abuse, and is probably making you feel worse and worse about yourself.  You need to get out before he totally ruins you.  You CANNOT change him.  He has to make that choice himself and seek the help.  You have done all you can do and he has refused counseling.  Tell him that if you are ever to come back, he will need to go to anger management and/or counseling.  You can only blame your childhood for so long until you have to take responsibility...it is time he takes responsibility for his own actions.  Good luck, and please get out before it is too late.  Three women in America are killed each day by their partners, don't be one of them!