what would you do if your relation with your family is worse than horrible?
372568
I'd ask myself what I did to make it this way. and what can I do to bring about a change to the current state. u can never blame others for ALL that is wrong with YOUR world. you hafta first take responsibility for your own short comings. Remember when you point the finger of blame at someone, three fingers are pointing back at YOU. \nNEVER EVER pick a bf/gf over family. when u meet someone and marry them you may consider it. until you cross that threshold it shouldn't be a consideration.(unless there's some history of abuse visited upon u by your family.)
1054278
if you are strong enough to relive the  worst moments of your life again,then i say you should sue for compensation.\nmoney wont change  what those evil  bastards put you through.....but if you can get something out of  the crap you have been through other than  anger and  bitterness,then why not. hope  it all goes  your way. u deserve it, your family deserve it.
238939
It happened to me. My husband and my sister no less.  It ruined my marriage, even after 28 years I haven't forgiven him.  He ended up with a terminal illness- Multiple Sclerosis for 15 years. He passed away in 2004. I felt like I had to stay and help him.  His actions affected my relationship with my older son and my sister...not that she was worth a second chance. But, I did try.  My mother, father, and baby sister didn't talk to me for 15 years- yea, like it was my fault. My brother and I remained estranged until he passed away. All I did was stay with the guy.  Big mistake! My younger son is not really part of the family every one shuns him because he looks like my husband. My sister's daughter ended up being an outcast and tried to commit suicide twice. What should you do?  Move on...make a life for yourself, find someone that respects you and loves you for who you are now... don't wait it will only hurt you! I am 53 back in college and making a life for myself for the first time. I have never been happier. I plan on traveling and staying alive! With as much enthusiasum as possible..If you need to have someone beside you I am sure that there will be that certain someone around the corner.  For myself, I just love being myself. One day maybe I'll meet someone but, for now my happiness and peace of mind it what counts to me.
174639
You can't really do much except let it roll off your back.  She's family and she'll get treated differently probably until she screws up.  As unfair as that is.  You can't say much because that'll make you the bad guy.  If it's really bothering you, you should look for another job.
1065181
This can be addressed with medication and therapy.  Please contact your local mental health facility for advice.  Before you sic the health department on your family member or start pitching stuff out behind their back, please at least do this.  If you just take over and do things for them, it takes away all their control, and they literally may never speak to you again.  If you care about them,  get them some help but be compassionate.\nThis is an invaluable site for some insight for you and them:\nhttp://www.squalorsurvivors.com
806480
You and your brother HAVE to call the police and report everything that this person has been and still is doing to you and your brother. \nNo matter how much you say you hate this terrible person you must never talk about killing him or you will become as bad as he is and you are not a bad person but a victim of abuse.\nMy heart goes out to you and your brother for having this creep as a father. No one should ever have to live the way you kids are living and I beg you to call the police now and not wait another minute either. The police will place the two of you in a safe place away from the abuse and it will be up to you and your brother to testify against this creep to make sure he's put away and won't harm you or anyone again. \nTake care and don't wait another minute to call the police either.
511129
there is no such thing as a conservative family every one has some dirt under the rug, and if thy think that you are not good enough now you will spend most of your time trying to show them that you are, that is if you get in the family. and its takes so much out of you that it is not worth it. i know, it sucks.
107993
depends how s**t your current situation is like. Also how much money you have, if you would miss your family and how much u can stand those vile americans (only jokin i love u reli)
240726
That's to bad for your family, and I'm sorry. But if things have been that bad for them to cause them to want to get a divorce, they both may much happier and that can only bring joy to your family as a whole just in a different way than your used too.
1006840
First of all, if your house and family are that bad, then she shouldn't come over any more.  Seems like to me she's being a BRAT, and using you and your family.  You should stop hanging with her and enjoy your family.  They can't be replaced, you can get a new friend.
284379
never....I could barely live with my own family as much as I love them, but that is because they are my family and I have to deal with them....random people I would have much less patience with.\n\nWhat if all the bills are in your name? What if they can't pay their share of property taxes? What if you can't stand them and want them to move, who gets the house and how do you split it up? What if the kids corrupt your kids or if the people turn out to be irresponsible parents? I know I would have more patience with my kids than someone else's. \nAlthough its cool to have people around, sometimes you do want alone time which you would never have in that situation. All it takes is one bad apple to ruin it for everyone else. The more people in one area, the better the chance you come upon a bad apple.
264137
I don't think there are any words or anything anyone can say that will make this better for you and your friends family.  Acts like this are absolutely senseless!  Hatred is never easy to understand or make sense of and in this case it is senseless.  Just hold your friends memory in your heart and he will always be alive for you.  Continue on with the good you were doing, that can be the best legacy for the bad in this case.  I will be thinking of you.
689780
I would try to let my family and loved ones know that I love them. And tell them not to be sad for too long, because it is bad for you. Maybe try to think of something funny, to lighten things up. Like, "Hey Mom, cheer up, at least I won't be borrowing money from ya all the time!" Then maybe eat a sandwich. And hug someone......... hopefully someone I know............ and like............ and who is not very stinky.
798829
Move out and move on.  You are obviously not happy with him and you need to do what is best for you.  Be positive and strong and discuss the situation with your family.  Good luck.
792171
If your family is that insensitive it's not likely that talking to them about it will do any good. If you can just play along with it and be the bigger person you'll feel better about it. Can you bring yourself to joke about it along with them or ask them for their advice? If you keep allowing this to hurt you, they'll smell blood and keep up with it. Change the subject by asking what challenges and rewards they've had with their relationships. If you get people talking about themselves, they'll forget about talking about you. Good luck. And by the way, don't feel guilty if you don't want to go to the family get-together. Find a charity that's hosting a Thanksgiving dinner, or better yet, work for one that is. Being around caring people, and people that are worse off than you, will be a great lifter of your spirits.
175807
Oh, I really feel for you. It's very hard to face this sort of situation.  If you know where he lives, send him a letter telling him exactly what you have told us; that you love him and miss him dreadfully, that you miss his friendship and him being in your life.  You don't say how old you both are, but if he was quite young when this happened it may be that he is regretting his hot-headedness (you might find that out when you establish contact with him, but not initially), and he may later welcome the chance to get back in touch with the family through you.\n\nBut if you want to contact him, you need to make it plain that if he doesn't want contact with his parents, that's regrettable but perhaps understandable, but it isn't his relationship - or lack of it - with them that bothers you, it's the relationship between the pair of you that you want to heal.  However, you will also need to be very careful about your own relationship with your parents.  It could hurt them dreadfully if they find out that you have been in contact with your brother, and hurt people tend to lash out.  It may be that your brother felt very hurt if you seemed to take their 'side' rather than his in whatever happened when all you were trying to do was mediate, or just got caught in the crossfire, and he lashed out at you.\n\nJust spend some time putting your thoughts down on paper, don't condemn him in any way at all, and tell him you will always love and miss him.  I hope it all works out well for you.
1156768
i know how you feel. i have some problems with my family also... i was fourteen when my parents sent me out from china to belize. my mom had my little brother when i was ten, and i couldn't accept the fact right away, and she usually scold me for everything. \nat the point of time, since they are coming and visit you, you should just act normal, and once you have a chance you call up your sister to a place where you guys can speak alone, and you need to tell her how much you are sorry about the past, and your feeling towards your whole family, and that no one can change what had happened, not even god. you need to tell her that you love her and that you are sisters, no matter what you will always be her sister and that no one can change it. people live people dies, and that you are sorry that your dad died, but nobody would want that to happened. you were just simply in love with someone that the family didn't wanted to accept and tell her that life is short, if she will continuing mad at you, then you couldn't do nothing more better to let her forgive you. Just remember don't yell at her or cry...\n\nwell, good luck, is just a suggestion that i am giving...\n\ngood luck again.