Problems with the parents in law?
362537
She's gonna have to decide, as we all do, WHEN she's ready to grow up.\n\nif she choses you, she may have to wait until her siblings are older before she sees them again. Again, I don't how how long that is and if she's willing to wait. She loses but so do her parents.\n\nIf she choses her parents, you will have to wait until she grows up, moves out and gets on with her life. Her parents might think they've won, but as she's old enough to lead her life in a way that makes sense to HER, she may cut them out of her life for making her choose.\n\nShe can gain their respect by becoming independent (of you\nAND of their manipulation). I bet they'd be pretty surprised if she said "I'm not gonna be forced into chosing what I don't want. I will say with him and I want to remain a part of your lives. If you choose to keep me from my siblings, then that's your choice for making them and me suffer. But I won't cave to ultimatums."
351330
IF she's old enough then she doesn't need the consent of her parents.  HOwever, i think you should still try to get their approval so that you will have good relationship with your in-laws.  If they  refuse you, keep trying.  They will eventually realize that you really love their daughter, for doing all that..
315035
They are in your house and will just have to deal with who you are. I know you feel like it matters what they think, but if you're already married to the guy then he obviously doesn't care what his parents think. Be yourself, and just try to be nice to them. If they talk down to you, etc, get your husband to talk to them and explain that he doesn't appreciate them disrespecting you in your own home. Stand your ground!
524060
Leave her alone, let your son and future daughter in law get on with their lives. If she is having an affair, that is really your son's problem. If he's asked for you to snoop, then tell him that one should never marry a person they cant trust.
842658
Your mother in law is forgetting the meaning of THANKSgiving.\n\nDO NOT let your marriage be dragged into the mess.  If you ate with your MIL last year then YOU and YOUR husband should honor your sisters wish to have the whole family together.   Explain to dragon lady that this is the first time in years your family has been together and RE invite her to enjoy a day with NO work. \nI lived it the WRONG way for 23 years I spent holidays at my in laws because we are neighbors and my mother in law DEMANDS it.  My mom lived 3 hours away and my  household was used to the big family get together next door.  SO we ALWAYS went to the in laws...So MY mom had a 3 or 4 person Thanksgiving .  \nMy mom died in June and I wish I had spent more Holidays with her. \n\nIf YOUR mother in law lives near by,  and your husband sees her regularly~  Then let her whine about Thanksgiving.    She should NOT be allowed to manipulate YOUR life with YOUR husband.    Visit her for PIE at her home after dinner, but do NOT give in and eat there.\n\n\nSorry so long , but TRUST me... I lived it the wrong way for 23 years...
667923
Be the mature one about this situation and put an end to it.  Talk to your husband and tell him that you don't want things to be like they are and you feel that your mother-in-law and father-in-law should come over and have a family discussion.  You start off the discussion by saying to your MIL "I'm sorry that your feelings were hurt...I spoke out of  anger when I said I didn't want to see you again and was just venting."  Then explain to your MIL and FIL that you want the family to all get along but there need to be some changes because it really hurts you when your MIl __________________________________  fill in the blank with what she does that bugs you.  That way everything is out in the open, you apologized and showed you are trying to work things out. (Mind you, in the back of your mind you'll be saying...look B+tch, I'm just doing this to make my husband happy...but, she doesn't need to know that.)  Good Luck.
577123
She's rude! If you're married to her son- your family! As for the kids, the noise or mess may bother her, but that is still no excuse.\nTry talking to your husband, he can speak to her on your behalf.
131010
girl, i feel your pain. i have the mother-in-law blues as well.  she shouldnt be so intrusive and pushy. my fiance and i just had a falling out with his mother. our lives are so peaceful when they dont talk. i dont know how close your husband is with his mother, but there are lines you just dont cross and shes just testing you out. i dont know if your a blunt person or not like me, but you and your husband can both say it her so that she understands its the two of you who feel this way. not just you. you have every right to feel uncomfortable about someone knowing your finances and business period. but first talk to your husband before you talk to her. good luck.
592512
Do you love her? Do you want to stay married? Can you move farther away from her parents so they'll interfere less? I guess everything depends on how much you love her and want to fight to keep her. And how tired of her parents you are. \nMy husband's mother always interfered in my marriage. He chose me over her, so now we don't speak to his parents at all. But our marriage is better now than it ever was. I guess it all depends on the two of you. Can you stand up to her parents and tell them to stop bothering you two? Can she tell her parents NO? If not, maybe those papers are a good idea.
413434
No, you should confront your ex wife. She should have the facts straight before she tries to spread any rumors about you. I think that your daughter in law needs to know what your son did. He doesn't need to take a chance on hurting his own daughter, but I don't think he would. I also think that your ex wife shouldn't be trying to make problems with you, your son, and daughter in law. It seems like she is bitter and trying to make everyone else miserable. Just explain to your daughter in law the truth, but let your ex know that you don't appreciate her trying to instigate trouble.
563677
Your Mother-in-Law sounds pretty tactless,surely her own common sense should have told her that this was NOT a very clever thing to do.As for saying her own son could come 'later',well that's totally out of order,her son should come first.I wholeheartedly agree with you in that the ex could have had her own celebration meal with her son and declined the invitation.If my Mother put me in that position I would be far from happy and tell her so.I would NOT attend the meal,explain it to the son and arrange to take him out for a celebratory meal.\nThe Mother-in-Law needs kicking into touch,is she close to her ex-daughter-in-law?Does she have a problem with you?Whatever this womans logic,which seems to be non existent,your husband need to address the problem and explain,in no uncertain terms that,you and he are a couple now and if she cant respect yours and his feelings then to maybe distance yourselves until she comes to her senses.
674466
Inlaws are bullies against their daughter inlaws usually because their sons don't stand up for their wives.  Any man worth his salt should stand up for the committment he made to be joined with his wife.  That means he has to let go of being tethered to his parents apron strings.  Good luck.
204294
My parents don't live in the area.  I talk to my monther 1-2 times per week. And my father every couple of weeks.  I think it's great your husband has a close relationship with his parents.  The problem, it seems like, is that he is talking to them when you want him focused on you and the kids.  My wife talks to her mom several times a week, but usually and on her commute home.  I do most of my talking when my wife isn't around.  I agree that it is annoying to have a spouse spend a lot of time on the phone with other people (family or not) when you are around.  Try to get husband to do his talking when it won't mean neglecting you & kids - that's more the problem, I think.
505937
I'm personally all for eloping, but in your case, it seems it might cause more problems than solutions.\n\nYou and your fiance need to have a clear plan established for how you are going to handle his controlling mother.  If he feels 'loyalties' to her now, he will when you are married.  And in-laws can be a great source of tension in new marriages.\n\nHow much would it really bother your parents if you eloped?  Mine know I plan to do that, and it still hurts them a bit that they won't be there.  Make sure you won't be hurting them outwardly.\n\nHow about a compromise, go to the courthouse with your immediate family members and get married.  Then in Sept you can hold a celebration party.\n\nGood luck.
803621
Because you aren't good enough for their child, and that's why In Laws will hate you.  Sometimes they're right, but more often than not, they are being unreasonable.
961205
well my ex inlaws were EVIL! (my 1st marriage)  they told my best friends sister we were getting married cause I was pregnant.. I wasnt.  They were suppose to bring food for the reception.. we counted on them.. they didnt, they walked out of our reception WITH thier gifts.. and gave them to my brother in-law (thier other son) and his girlfriend.  When our baby was born, 22 months later.. they flew to Ca to visit other family and go ski-ing in tahoe.. but wouldnt come to our house..... so we packed up everything and our 2week old baby and drove 2+ hours to see them.  They never gave a gift w/o leaving the tag still on it.  They dont talk to thier grandaughter but maybe once a year, but thats my fault (!?!?)  most recently, they sent her a birthday card and didnt even sign it.  do I detest them.... thats putting it mildly!\n\nI dont know my husbands parents as they were both deceased before I met him.
442060
Do you know that 7 in 10 women do NOT get along with their mother-in-laws?\n\nI'm also one of that 7...it doesn't get easier but there are ways of dealing with them.\n\nGo buy "Toxic In-Laws" by Susan Forward, it helped me understand & deal my MIL & FIL better...they can't be "fixed" nor will they change.\n\nThere are also several other books out there dealing with this topic...just look up "Toxic Inlaws" on Amazon.