I set goals for myself, & now am trying to live to someone elses's goals & am dissapointed, how to reconcile?
367155
You have set goals for yourself and that should be the priority. Your goals will be best achieved by yourself and will give you satisfaction in your career. If someone else's goals are clashing with your own, its time to talk to that 'someone' and tell him/her that you have your own principles to live by. You have no one to live up to when it comes to your own personal dreams or ambitions. You have realised that you are ''trying'' to live to someone else's goals, and you do feel disappointed. At the end of the whole thing, you would be the most disappointed person to realise that you had time to change and set on the path you had set for yourself, and it would be too late, and you would only end up frustrated.\n\nMake things clear, sternly. Make it very clear that ''this is what  i'll do, and thats how its going to be''. Never compromise, ofcourse, as long as it doesnt hurt someone else's space. \n\ngood luck !
4632
Good quesiton. I have had somewhat the same problem in the past. What I started doing was making lists of what needed to be done & always made sure that I put free time on the list as well. You need to find a balance & make the most of the free time that you have available.\n\nHere's an example: I listed all of the cleaning chores I needed to accomplish in a month & then worked out how often each needed to be done. When I was finished, I realized that there were really only one or two things each day, so long as I kept to my schedule. I then mapped out time that I could use as free time (which, for me, means without family at home) & worked it into the shcedule. When I hit those times, I just make sure that I do exactly what I want to do & nothing more.\n\nThe funny thing is that making yourself adhere to a schedule of sorts for only a few weeks has some amazing effects...I'm now the type of person who will stop to make sure that there is nothing else that needs to be done before I take my "me" time. Tell you one thing though, if this house is spotless, dinner is cooked & the laundry is done, you'd best consider how dear your life is to you if you ask me to do something else once I've decided to take my hour or two of solitude!\n\nIn the end, you can train yourself to be more productive & to balance free time against what needs to be done. As for real ambition, you might need to consider what goals you have & work toward them slowly. The main trick is accomplishment; if you set goals for yourself, even small ones, & you accomplish them, you will start to make it a habit...accomplishment breeds more accomplishment &, in many ways, ambition & accomplishment are one in the same...\n\nHope this helps!
582217
I wish you well Monitorhead it is a tough habit to break but you can certainly do it. You will feel proud of yourself when it is all said and done. Everyone has a different means of motivating themselves, find yours and \nstick with it my friend. Wishing you the best, and know you will succeed.
654009
I don't plan the rest of my plan, cus there's no point.  Sh!t happens and plans change and you have to improvise and alter the plan.  I have an idea of where I want to be next year and that's about it.  I believe if you map out your entire life, without knowing what's gonna happen tomorrow, you're gonna be really dissappointed when it doesn't turn out the way you hoped.  There's really no point in setting yourself up for regret.
144325
I used to be just like that. You have to realize that you have to please yourself before you can really please anyone else. Don't go through your life regreting what you did not do and resenting someone else because of the choices that you yourself made. Try it slowly at first and see how it works for you. You will be surpised at how much better you will feel. Take baby steps. The world was not made in a day.
895873
Just try to get out of the habit.  It could be a great first step to let them know you would like to do better too.  Stick with it keeping in mind that it will take some time to change yourself, and how others react to you.\nGood work, and good luck, I'm sure you will be happier.\n\nps Only those with limited life experience would ever confuse a nice person with a weak person.
336673
not being satisfied with one relationship, but too lazy to end  one before starting another.
39362
I've done that in the past 3 years.  You need to find yourself again.  Me and my ex-wife split and I had a difficult time getting on my feet.  But I eventuly did and everything is great now.  I'm going back to college and trying to make my life better.  Maybe a little to prove I can.  It may take time but don't give up and always remember you are a great person and can do great things.
718130
You understand it, then detach from it and rememberthe feeling. Once you come to grips you can only go up from there. start off with small goals and work your way up doing larger tasks. Don't overwhelm yourself and be sure to talk to someone to get another view or just to vent.
1067591
set your goals, but do so PRACTICALLY. DON'T put too much on your plate...do what you can in 24 HOURS -- and no more...focus and you will achieve...good luck...acknowledging that you have a problem with this is the first step.....
129812
based on your question I don't know if you are frustrated or complete.\n\nIf you are complete you can congratulate yourself and move onto new goals.  Perhaps you can try helping others, family, friends.\n\nIf you are frustrated because you can't do enough try doing baby steps.  If things seem too tough try breaking them down into smaller goals.  Stop feeling bad for what you can't get done, concentrate on doing a few things and feel good about what you do accomplish.  If it's still too much try meditation and don't forget to take time to relax.\n\nGood luck :-)
1058727
Set a goal and slowly work towards it, even if you have to start all over with nothing.  ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.  Life is what you make of it!  Everyone has different goals and we all suffer the highs and lows of life.  The trick is to endure/minimize the lows and obviously enjoy/maximize the highs.  Now given your situation, I would try to seek moral support or help from friends or maybe some professional guidance to get you back on track.  As Big Daddy has suggested you can always get a job at fast food, you can try a retail store like Target, Walmart, or Kmart.  The best place would be the military, since you can get training in a specific field like electronics, computers, etc.
670521
There are a lot of strategies.\n\nYou could put a goal weight or new piece of clothing somewhere where you always see it.\n\nYou could pursue your goal with a friend.\n\nThe most important thing, IMHO, is to allow yourself to cheat once in a while and/or to be forgiving when you aren't sticking to your plan perfectly.  There's a great expression AA folks use:  progress, not perfection.  \n\nAs long as you're making progress in the right direction...that is motivating in itself.\n\nBEST OF LUCK!!
839863
Hmmm OK then!! I really hate it when women or men for that matter think that having a partner can help to complete them! You can acheive goals on your own!! You don't need a man to help you!!!!!!!!!!!
51117
Never let anyone tell you that you can't do something. If they do, let that be an incentive to show them differently but overall you should achieve your goals for yourself. Think of people that have invented something, the failures they endured and how in the end they finally got it right. It's all about mind over matter...
361447
If you don't know, how can anyone else know? It's your life, and you got to live it.It sound like you are just going through life aimlessly. You have to set goals on what you want to do, and how to accomplish these goals. Unless you want to a professional bum, and do NOTHING the rest of your life.
152001
if u somehow lost ur goals, u could start with the goals of the ones u love. if u dont have loved ones, find the ones that nobody loves and help them. sometimes helping others works best to help us