My gf and I broke up for about 2 months then got back together recently, is my situation bad? HELP!!!!?
362103
what she did...how quickly she seemed to "get over you" hurt you...when people hurt us, it's hard to forget that pain we went through...\nbut you know what i've found out? our brains are very powerful organs...if we choose to not let it hurt us, then pretty soon we'll convince ourselves that it doesn't...maybe think of it in a different way...obviously she was trying to move on as quickly as possible b/c it hurt her too much to be without you...have you thought of it this way?...maybe it was her defense mechanism so she wouldn't be hurting so bad, either...obviously she still loved you b/c she came back to you...\nlife gets to be routine and sometimes can feel like you're in a rut or bored...but you know what? a good relationship isn't worth throwing away over a little boredom...if you really love each other, then find new ways of doing things...do things you wouldn't normally do...go on a vacation together and experience something new together...like hiking or white water rafting...something in which you won't be alone the whole time...spice up your sex life...\nyou take care of your part...you plan things to surprise her...you know, do your part and she'll do hers...come up with a list of things you want to do and plan them out according to your finances and do them together...\nbut trust me, being in a rut with a good person is worth way more than jumping from relationship to relationship trying to find something new...
1166692
Just make it clear that there are conditions to getting back together and that one of them is that the past is the past and that you two are working on a future.  If the past becomes an issue then there is no relationship.
1021323
"It didn't go over well", huh ?  You mean that SHE broke up with you and you dabbled around with someone else, then you two got back together and she is ticked off ?  if that's what you are saying, then she is merely not in control of the Green-Eyed Monster.  You see, what she meant by breaking up with you was "See ?  See how much you will miss me ?  See how empty your life is without me ?" ....she didn't mean that you two were really "broken up" - it was just a test for you to see how important SHE was to you and when you went on to someone else,  - WELL - that wasn't exactly in her plans.  And she is hurt and she is angry.\n\nWell, you are not responsible for either emotion that she is feeling, although it would not hurt if you understood them.  She did this to herself.  You can empathize that she feels bad that you were able to so quickly "replace" her (because that is what she feels....and, to tell the truth....that is what happend.)  We human beings don't like to think that we are easily replaceable.  But, indeed, we are.  (Ah yes, for all our talk about "soulmates" the truth of the matter is that many people can be our "soulmate" and that means it is not quite so much destiny as timing.)  She may well have expected you to pine away after her and when you did not, she is angry.\n\nLife is all about growing up - all the way until we die.  You both have gone through an episode that should have taught you both some lessons - different lessons than the other could have learned.  Now you are back together and going forward, hopefully not backward.  (She is looking backward, by the way.)\n\nAnd, as a side note, this idea of full disclosure - telling new girlfriends or boyfriends about your past - not a good idea.  Not particularly respectful of the people in the relationships in your past.  The same holds true for interim relationships - you weren't "with" your current girlfriend during the time you were broken up, you should not share details about whatever you did in your interim relationship.  It is not her business and it is disrespectful to the other girl.  (None of this "oh, if you loved me you would share with me" - see what it got you ?  She's pissed.)\n\nAnd no, it wasn't cheating.
757413
ive been there done that, and i did end up gettin back together with my ex, for a lil while.\n\ni suggest u think abt the fact if she would still want you back? does she love you? do u love her? can u work things out??\n\nthink abt these questions and answer then, and once u have a solution go and decide what u want to do,\n\nyou see, maybe she still loves you and she is going through the same thing so all hope is not lost, uve just lost her for a lil while, but if u hang in there, and since she is ur ex girlfrind that means u know her already, so try figuring out what she wants and what she needs, try fixing what went wrong, go back into her life and try being the man that she needs you to be\n\n\njust remember to have hope and hang in there, and maybe if after reading this u wanna call her, go and do that, but just incase it does not work out with her, its a lesson learnt and soon u may  just meet the one for you\n\n\nall the best, \n\nremember its your life, its in your hands, try figuring it out and live it
366542
The question is does she love you back?  How long were you dating before you broke up?  Me?  I had a relationship for 7 years and I still love him but we grew apart.  I realize now that I love the idea of being with the person I once knew.  If you have not spoken to her in 2 years, she is probably not the person you fell in love with anymore.  I would err on the side of moving on!  Nothing will ever be the same as the relationship that you had with this person.  I guarantee it.  But don't let that close your heart to new and better relationships.  Use what you had with her as a learning experience.  Don't compare her to the other women you date.  That is a fatal mistake.  I know its hard ,but you have to move on with your life in your mind, your spirit and your body.  Please don't hold your relationship with her on a pedestal.  Clear your heart and keep moving!\n*Muah*
1053662
Why did you break up in the first place? How long have you known each other? How long has it been since you broke up?  Do you want him back?  These are all questions you should be asking yourself.  Then perhaps you'll know if it's right for you to pursue him again or to just forget him and move on. :)
508599
Man if u let her stay with him alone for 2 weeks, then u are asking for trouble. If she's already been with an older guy, then she knows the deal. He sounds like a smooth talking guy anyway and what's he got to loose? nothing. So if she does stay there with him that long, u might as well get ready to find a new girl, cause ur relationship prolly wont last after that. She would prolly just deny that that anything happened with him, and then find some reason to break up anyway.
772856
Why did you all split up?? Could it not work out with the 2 of you?? Have you told her how you feel, maybe you should. But if it just won't work out then you'll have to do what all us crazy people do when we love someone and they don't love us back is give ourselves some time and it will heal all the pain. Hope your heart feels better!!!!
670567
Move on is the best answer. You broke up for a reason. Always remmeber that reason.
156221
I dont think she is playing a game. You two broke up and i think your prolonged contact with her is making it hard for her to let go. She might well have feelings for you still but having feelings for someone doesn't mean she wants to be with you. You giving her things keeps her feeling obligated to talk to you. I would wish her a happy valentines day and tell her happy birthday when it rolls around but back off to some degree. The only real way to know if she wants to get back together with you is to be straight up and ask or back off and see if she comes looking for you.
835216
hmm.. wad cause the broke up in the first place? is the problem still around? and way to solve it?\n\nthis is the few questions u gotta ask yerself... if there isn't any problems at the moment.. will there be any coming up? will u guys be able to handle it togther or u  guys gonna break up again?? \n\nif u can answer this question, more or less u know whether to stay and wait (cos she's worth the wait) or move on (cos a break up will happen anyway)...\n\ngood luck to yer dude,,, u need it,,,
610541
I'm sorry about your breakup, I know things like this can be hard and no matter what people say, we always want things to come out the way we hope it does. \n\nBut it seems like, almost a year is going by, and no progress.  Do you realize that if you keep trying to get back with someone who doesn't want you, you may miss the one intended for you?  It seems like it's really over between the two of you, and maybe it's time to move on and spend some time recovering from your breakup.  Then get back into the dating field and see what happens.  \n\nI hope you find who you are looking for, because it isn't this other girl.  \n\nGood Luck!\n:)
254214
2yrs is a long time if you decide to get back together its like starting a new relationship except the fact you have been broken before. A relationship should not be brain surgery but in your case you should understand that some woman have to go to the bottom to realize that you were the best out there I will lie if i  was to say you can gain trust because now not only you don't trust her every argument is going to pop up about the fact that she left. Think about yourself a little think what do you want... whats gonna make you happy...she tested the water and now she want you ...you got to realize the importance of trust is in the relationship without it you wont be happy.....if you still love her you got to let the past go and expect it can happen again..........but you cant let it effect you....
944919
Hey Thor, I've been there. So, i can feel what you are going thru. Let me tell you this..Leave the past alone. Dont think of it. I didnt see you writting that you love her. True that u have feelings for her & she is ur 1st. But still, she broke up with you.i.e dont want to be with you. Move on...leave ny thing that remind you with her. Look to the future. It will take time to move on i know...but time is all what you have
284735
hey well one sorry to hear that. two well the best thing i think you can do is go talk to her. find out exactly why she broke up with you. if the chemistry just wasn't there for her you will have to find a way to move on. if it was something else that can be fixed well than talk to her and maybe you can fix it. goodluck and i wish you all the best.
531789
wow-- u sould like a great guy, i wish i had a guy like you. I think she cant believe what she has. Maybe she is taking a break to find out what she has is true. Dont ignor her, just give her time. dont call her, dont do anything. wait for her to gather her thoughts. and she will come back, she will realize what she has. Did she say y she broke up with you? I know its hard, and we have all gone through it, just give her time... time heals. dont call her.
778372
I'd say she's feeling lonely and want you back. If you still love her, move your butt out of that computer chair and ask her to have lunch or dinner with you. I wish you two best of luck. Remember, there may not be any 2nd chances like this.