Do i lack confidence/self-esteem?
362662
If you must ask this question , and try to justify yourself, sadly YES.  Self-esteem comes from within and not needing an outside to validate you.\n\nIf this helps, my mum said remember , nobody cares, they are too busy worrying about their faults to notice yours.
250497
BUY THE DR. PHIL BOOK OR ANY BOOK ON SELF-ESTEEM.  WHY DID YOU 'LOSE' YOUR CONFIDENCE?
105131
I would suggest counseling. It sounds like you have some deep rooted issues that need to be worked out. This is something more complex than a self esteem problem.\n\nLove yourself, you are beautiful and deserve to be happy!
61699
Just try to make yourself stronger. don't think of poeple talkings much and improve your self confidence.\nI was like this when I was younger but I released being sensentive too much is not worth at all.
389304
Start giving yourself Brownie points for every good choice you make. Confidence and self-esteem are earned, nobody is born just possessing them. Every time you make someone smile, remind yourself that you have that ability. Do your work honestly and well. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Give others sincere compliments and don't always expect others to set your standards of decency or to make you happy. Remember, you're not transparent. People can't tell how you're feeling. Eventually, feeling confident will become second nature. But above all, be kind to yourself and others. And just have fun!
1116907
Forget what you were, and start living a new life. And read a lot of books on any subject under the sun to keep your mind occupied. As you relax, over a period of time you'll get over the low self esteem bit.\nAll the best!\nst
765138
self esteem is how positive you feel about yourself.  if u are happy with the way you engage in social settings, your confidence level is good, your are generally content with yourself, your self esteem is normal.  if you have low self esteem, your generally are not content with the way you behave, how u see yourself, and generally not happy on how you think u present yourself to others, then u have low self esteem.  u develop self esteem through life experiences, and self evaluation,  sometimes self esteem can take a while in ones life.  if you think about yourself, and find things u do not like, then u can work on these to increase your self esteem.  u do have to set realistic goals for yourself and know what u can do and can"t do.  you have to be content with your self and realize that everybody has limitations and you have to accept that.  for example a brilliant doctor may be good in his field, but realizes and accepts the fact that he may not be able to fix a toilet.
948337
When you need to boost your self confidence or self esteem, find 3 things that make you feel good. These could be memories of good times, a piece of music, a holiday souvenir, or a person's face - use photos if it helps. Practise thinking about them and bringing them to mind. \n\nDeveloping self confidence that lasts - because of the way emotions 'attach' themselves to memories, you will quickly train yourself to feel good when you want - a great help.\n\nSelf consciousness is the No.1 enemy of self confidence. Learn how to keep your attention off yourself. You can do this easily by following these steps...\n\na) If you notice you have become self-conscious, (you can usually tell because you start to feel anxious), choose something 'everyday' you can see and study it in detail. For example: examine a door, look at the different textures and shades of colour, wonder about who made it and how and so on. The important thing is that you're learning how to keep your attention off yourself.\n\nb) If you feel self-conscious in a social situation, it's usually because you don't have enough to do! Focus on what your purpose in the situation is. Whether you're there to: \n\nfind out if you like the other people in the situation \nmake others feel comfortable \nfind out some information \nmake business contacts \nand so on...
1139463
Yes, I do. I've always had low self esteem and lacked confidence, even from a very early age for some reason. I always did well at school, I'm currently a few daya away from qualifying as a doctor, and yet I still feel useless and worthless. I feel like nothing I say is of any significance or relevance to anyone, I don't understand why anyone would like me unless I DO something to make them like me. I constantly worry about what other people think about me. I could go on and on......\n\nMy poor confidence and low self esteem led to severe social anxiety, which (since I didn't get any help with) in turn led to a severe depressive episode, with associated self harm and suicidal tendencies. I'm now slowly improving with the help of a psychiatrist and some anti-depressants, but my self esteem and self confidence remain very low. \n\nIf you can really help, I would appreciate it. I'm on Yahoo messenger and my e-mail is accessible on my Q&A page.
174490
I used to feel this way too. It didn't help that my friends are all beautiful and I was alittle bit overweight, but I found the best way to get a mans attention is confidence. I had 0 confidence and it really brought me down and made me even more depressed. Now when I walk into a bar I walk head held high and shoulder back, and the heads turn. I'm just a plain Jane, but confidence is sexy. Most of my friends are male and i've lived with 7 male friends. I've learned a lot about how men act. Also it doesn't hurt to know a think or two about sports. Makes for a good ice-breaker. Use this "Do you think Houston should trade their #1 pick?"
240864
Low self-esteem seems to be a common problem.\nI think that if you try to focus on the positive things\nin your life,get a more optimistic attitude,it would be a good first step in the right direction.\n Other than that,if you can't do therapy,try to recognize\nthat there are people who care about you in your life and that's most important. No matter how it may seem,your world is not really coming apart.From your post,things may not be as perfect as you would like but they could be a lot worse.\nHang in there.
546122
Have you thought of counselling? That may be the 'easier' road you are looking for. Ultimately though, you will have to talk to others in social events to be able to learn to do it with confidence. Experiencing life like travelling, can be a good way to build your confidence, for the more you know about something, the more you can talk about it with passion.\nGaining a better view of ones self (self esteem) can also come when presented with challenges that one overcomes, so challenge yourself-give yourself tasks that you know are hard, but that you are able to overcome. Do you have a fear of spiders for example? Overcome that and you will certainly want to tell people about it! I did!!\n If you would like to chat more about it, feel free to email me from the link at my avatar and I'll try to help.\n\nbest of luck
1031555
No one can make you more confident.  You have to do that for yourself.  If you go looking for some guy to boost your self-esteem, you'll attract a guy who will tell you anything you want to hear to get you in bed, & from what you are saying, that isn't something you are ready for at this time in your life.  Right now, you need to focus on you.  Try to work on school, a job, & make the most of yourself.  If you start setting new, realistic goals for yourself & achieving them, your confidence can't help but go up, & guys will notice this.  Good luck.
59369
You have to get out of the negative talk in you head that keeps you feeling self conscious.\n\nThe best way to do this is to do something selflessly for someone else. Go volunteer at a soup kitchen, or at a hospital, put change in someone’s expired meter without them knowing, go volunteer at head start , do at least  3 selfless acts a day, with no concern of how you will benefit and or gain from it and I promise you will begin to feel better about your self. \n\nAlso do something nice for yourself at least once a week, paint you r nails, get a facial, and take a relaxing bath, what ever you like. \n\nThe best way to feel good about your self is to give, give to other, give to yourself, and you will begin to receive all the confidence and self worth that you need and more!!
466154
the way you see yourself and the way other people see you are always completely different for everyone. self esteem and confidence seem to be whats up with you and you can change how you feel about that,  with the right help, so go for it but remember its not what you look like but what you act like that really matters.
664949
Sounds to me like you need friends who will encourage you and be confidence builders. You're going it alone and your shyness is holding you back and this is where good friends will step in and give you support. Reach out, make friends who will help you feel more secure about yourself. Some of us here list our emails and message links to be of help. Take advantage of this and the experience others may have that can offer you support and advice as friends should.\n\nBest Wishes!!
173645
Good usually but i have self-esteem issues from time to time like everybody else!