What do I do about my selfish girlfriend?
357237
Selfish people never see their own selfishness.  And that's a basic truth with all of us.  We never see our own faults most of the time unless someone else points them out.  You should hold a mirror up to your girlfriend's face and tell her exactly what she does that makes her a selfish person.  And I know this is difficult for most men to do but, tell her how her actions make you feel.  And remember to point out to her that you love her and that's the reason why you are pointing these things out to her.  You aren't trying to change her, you are trying to make her quality of life (and your relationship) better.
874267
Break up with her, now.\n\n\nYou can't help someone that doesn't want to help themselves.
263988
That first answer was stupid, useless and mean! Anyway, I think you have to think about how much you love her and if you really want to be with her forever. If you do, then you must sit her down and talk to her about how you feel. Tell her that if she doesn't stop "pushing your buttons", or at least try to, that you have no choice but to separate. Put the ball in her court, make her understand how important it is and how much it affects you AND the relationship. Hopefully she'll understand and cooperate. She shouldn't get pissed off b/c you said she admitted to it before. Just make sure you talk to her calmly and with respect. Let her know that you're hurt by it, not just angry about it. Most chicks can sympathize with a guy, but if you're angry, they get defensive. Perhaps she's unaware that she does it, or when she does it. Meaning that overall she knows it happens, but can't really catch herself doing it. Maybe you need to agree that you can kindly remind her when she does it. My boyfriend and I have a similiar problem in that we do it to each other. Reminding one another really helps us to curb our behavior. It works really well when we both commit to it, but we do slip up now and again. Of course, if she's not willing to do this with you, then obviously she doesn't care enough to try and you should just dump her. And if your answer to the first question is NO then you do the same. I hope this helps you out. GOOD LUCK!
1066795
Well, what did you do to lose her trust?  Try listening to her more, don't wait until she tells you do to something like chores, do them before she has to ask.  Don't sneak around behind her back, be honest of your actions.
122407
Talk to her about it and ask her what her ambitions are.  It's not wrong to try to get your girlfriend motivated, it is wrong though to insist on it or force the issue.  I'm sure you don't do that.  If you have a problem with her messy apartment, then why don't you volunteer to help her clean it?  Or, just start cleaning it yourself if she doesn't mind.  If a woman had a problem with my messy apartment, I'd tell her to clean it if she had a problem with it.  So, there's nothing wrong with expecting you to if you don't like it that much.  I'm not saying you have to clean it or that she does.  I'm just saying you can either deal with her messy apartment or you can consider helping her out.  Have a talk with her too and see if she has any dreams that she might have given up on.  If she bothers you that much, than break up with her and find someone else.
277173
Ignore her. She will self-destruct sooner or later.  The more that she sees that you are bothered or vexed, the more she will continue to do it.  She's trying to get your attention and if she finally realizes that it's not working, she will stop.
1157943
Make her a list of things she should do. Make a list for yourself of things to do too. Try to be fair with the amount of work. Post up the lists to remind her. Make sure she doesn't tear down the lists. Just do your lissted chores and leave her share of chores to her and don't do them. Be firm. Loving someone doesn't mean being weak, spoiling them or being a pushover. If you don't put down your foot on this matter, she will climb over your head on other matters too. Show her your leadership position and that you mean what you say. If she doesn't want to cooperate, use "tough love" , ie don't cooperate with her in things she wants you to do as a retaliation.  If she is really incorrigible, dump her.
562157
If you still care about her and want to try saving the relationship, talk to her and let her know how you're feeling.  If you're just done and don't want to save the relationship, leave.  No one should feel obligated to stay in a relationship with a partner who's unkind.
112439
Not all of us are selfish, just as not all men are selfish. Stop generalizing and ask yourself if you're not a bit selfish at times. Everyone is selfish every once in a while, it's human nature. You just haven't met the right girl yet, Honey. You will meet her one day. =)
650150
Ooooh, touchy subject.\n\nThis is how you do it. I can't guarantee it will work because she maybe very sensitive. \n\nSounds like you have a needy GF. Best way to do it is in person. Preferably, do something nice for her first, take her out on a nice date, a nice ralaxing one. Tell her how much you care about her. Ask her if she knows this? Pay attention to her reactions now! If she looks like she's not sure, you Re-Assure her. Then tell her you want her to do things on her own, things to better herself with. Say she should spend more time with her friends and family because you think it's important that she does that. Tell her you want an independent girl. Tell her you want her to be happy on her own and with herself. And you want to be there for her to add to her happiness. Because between you and me and whom ever is reading this, we are responsible for our own happiness, no one else. You can tell her that too in a nice way. \n\nYou basically make it sound possitive so she doesn't take it the wrong way....Then you tell her that you love to spend time with her but you also need time for yourself too and this is why you want her to do things on her own more. Then tell her again that you are not going anywhere, that you are there when she needs you. \n\nMake sure you give her a hugs and kisses afterwards...."Affection"  - - - i don't know any woman who doesn't go gaga for it.\n\nGood luck!
118233
your behavior seems very irresponsible.  look at yourself.  take responsibility for yourself, your feelings, your actions.  Learn from your mistakes in this relationship
636241
Being selfish.  Maybe you oughta suggest an activity both of you can do.
810507
It's very controlling behavior and not fair to you. You don't need to put up with it. The fact that you beg her to stop puts her in a position of power. It's important you stand up for yourself, and ask what is really bothering her, because it's not about a ham sandwich. She sounds very insecure. She wants you to fit in this little mold that she's made for you, and when you don't, she gets angry. If she simply doesn't like any little thing you do that's out of her control, you might need to rethink your relationship. I especially hate that she doesn't like you getting better grades than her. That's not healthy for you. Do you really want to be with someone that would rather have you fail so she feels better about herself? I see too many marriages like this. It's like they were allowed to get away with it as kids, and act like spoiled, selfish brats as adults because no one stands up to them. You've already played nice. Told her how it makes you feel, and she's not getting the message, or doesn't care enough to try. You need to tell her to knock it the hell off, or you're gone. And make good on it. Your future happiness relies on it.\n\nBy the by, there's a difference between love and codependance. You are *not* responsible for, nor have to feel guilty over her emotional well being. She apologizes only to make you come back. It's a vicious cycle. Best of luck. It's not easy.
713857
I understand you love her to death but everytime you talk to someone of the opposite sex she is going to keep doing this. You have few options here you can put her in her place and just let her knwo your not going to stop communicating with the opposite sex just because she is insecure, you could never talk to the opposite sex again but that will make you miserable, or you could tell her how much her insecurities bother you and how unreasonable she is being but it sounds like everytime you talk to a female she turns into a big big bitch. Is that what you really want to deal with, ask yourself.
346711
I've been there mate, sorry to say it, but she's taking you for a ride. She's using you when she find's it convenient. Sever this "relationship" before it breaks you in two. If she's willing to treat you like that, she's not worth it. She obviously doesn't have a high regard for your feelings, because if she did, she would have got with you totally, or not at all. Sorry to say it mate, but break this one up now, please. I know how painful it will eventually be if you don't.
874254
she doesnt prioritize and she let work take over her life. i think she's trying to satisfy everyone all at the same time and its taking a toll on her much less making her have different personalities. \n\nof course any other person would feel frustrated for getting tossed around and hit in the head with confusion, but you have to understand that she's human. BUT it doesnt give her the right to keep you dangling on a thread.\n\nobviously she still wants you around so try talking to her in a different environment or atmostphere-some where it wont remind her of work or school, etc. for instace the beach, a coffee shop, the place you first took her to confess your feelings. and then talk to her like as if its almost an ultimatum, but not. \n\ntell her everything that you feel and how its affecting your relationship with her. talk about the way she act or the things that she does to hurt you or confuse you. tell her that youre going to let her deal with whatever she needs to deal with at her own pace. that youre going to respect her space so long she respects yours.\n\nhopefully this is an eye opener for her or is helpful for you to think up something to do. \n\nbest wishes. stay true.
867490
TOUGH LOVE.  make realize that she does have a problem, that needs to be handled.  If she really does care about your opinions she will listen to you. If she doesn't she'll tell you to butt out of her business.\n\nIf she does not want to change SHE DOES NOT DESERVE YOU.\n\ni wish the best, and hope everything works out for both of you.