I think my dad is depressed..?
368928
Oh my gosh, I never, ever, thought I'd say this, but I agree with, with--ahem, I know I can do this, I agree with the hippe!  (man that hurt)\n\nCommunication, simple, honest, with love, is the best way to go.  You may wish to state that you are "concerned" rather than "worried".  You could even stop short of describing your concern.  Just, "Dad, I'm concerned about you, is everything all right?"  Then, LISTEN to what he says.  He may brush it right off.  If he does, leave it at that.  Sometimes it seems people don't hear us, but they do, and given a few days time, or so, he may come back to you with something.
277579
Honey, I'm so sorry.  It all depends on if they work things out between them, but the truth is they may not even know at this time.  Please don't think it's your fault.  Adults have a lot of issues to deal with.  I'm sure your Dad loves you and misses you very much.  Include them in your prayers. I will too.
1077012
Find a time when he is relaxed and watching tv. Ask him if you can talk about something that is really important to you and that you need his help. \nWhen expressing your feelings we teach children to do this:\nState what you are feeling:\nDad, I am really lonely. I love you but I am getting really depressed and it scares me. When I am home alone during the day, I feel really lonely because......................\nthen say exactly what you feel and speak from the heart.\nIn the end, ask if he can help you.
212313
i'm so sorry about your father...all i can say is: be patient with him , give all the love and care you can give him, talk with your father about everything, spend as much time with him as you can\nas for you...take it one day at a time...dont think of his going away...focus on the things you could do for your father while he is still alive...surrender your grief to the Lord\nGod bless you, friend...
778710
My heart goes out to you and your Dad and your whole family. This must be really hard for you all. Especially around the holidays. I believe that everybody and every living thing on this earth has an energy about them. If I were you I would take his hand in yours and pour your energy into him. Give him as much as energy as you can. I cannot tell you how to do it because for me, it just happens. I can feel the love and the warmth intertwining with the other.\nThis is the time you of all people need to keep the faith, whichever faith that is. By you keeping the faith and sharing it with your Dad, it will help to keep his faith. More faith means more positive energy and a stronger recovery. Share your energy with your family and friends. It will be passed onto your Dad as well. \nDo not be sad. Sadness is not a good energy. You must believe all will be well. Know your Dad wants to be well. Deep inside he doesn't want to let you down. Show him how positive you are about it. Don't act it. Believe it and when all is said and done, things will be what they were. Maybe now, they will even be better. As a Dad myself, there is nothing more important to me than to make my daughter happy and I am sure your Dad is the same way.\nKeep the faith. Be positive. BELIEVE in your Dad recovery. Share your energy with him each and every time you see him. Tell him you love and not just in passing. Take an actual moment of time to convey this to him.\nChin up. Take note the beautiful day that is out there. Take a walk in nature. Let natures energy revive you, charge you, and bring that back to your Dad.\nTake care and remember. "Don't worry, be happy"!
906850
Well your dad obviously is one of those men who moves around a lot in life...you are right to expect more, but you may find yourself disappointed over and over in life...because now this new chick in his life will want him all to herself and she will want to be his priority.  So you are going to be in a difficult situation.\n\nYou are lucky you had this time together.  Hopefully you will have more time together.  Talk to you dad when she's not around and tell him how you feel.  Really have a heart to heart with him about your feelings...in the past and now...and what your fears are.  This way he will be aware and will sense when you are feeling this way...and hopefully find a way to smooth it all out so you can all be happy.  Don't be surprised though if this girl may sway him away from you.  She isn't much older than you and probably you are as mature if not more than she is...what's with that dad of yours anyhow!  Sheesh.  Nothing you can do about it if it he ends up with this woman but you shouldn't become enemies with her or it will be very hard and your dad may have to choose and hey...men don't always think with thier heads.  Good luck to you.
673721
time. that's all that works...you can't do something else to take your mind off it, or take a pill or anything. He's your dad. You're going to have to take time to grieve. Do it. It's supposed to happen. After a while it'll get easier, but you won't ever forget.
1055134
Bring him to the doctor or the nearest mental health clinic.  They will evaluate him, and decide if he needs medication or therapy--or both.  \n\nGet him into drinking Chamomile Tea, and use lavender scented aroma-therapy in his house.  If the doctor decides on therapy and no medication, he can try using Valerian Root (which he cannot if put on tranquilizers or antidepressants).  It is available in capsule form even at Walmart--and of course, at health food stores.\n\nI have a feeling that he will be put on some sort of med if he is that anxious, but then you need to see to it that he takes it.  Just being retired can be traumatic for some, he may be sure that he is of no further value in this world. \n\nGood luck with your dad, I know that he can be helped.
3208
sometimes depression is the issue. If that's the case, his perspective is distorted. It's like watching life through a pair of sun glasses. Everything seems grey and dark. He needs to realize it is not that way, and life is truly what you make of it, and what your willing to see out of it.
624887
Just talk to him, tell him you noticed he's been distant lately and that you are concerned. IT could be many things, he might be having problems at home. Best of luck!
531378
Even if it feels weird talking to your dad about it, i think you should give it a shot. he is the one that can truly understand you - not some shrink that you hardly even know. he will know what you're going through and he`ll give you the support that you need.\n\ni hope you feel better.
429595
This seems a bit cold - and I apologize for that. But you need to really take a GOOD look around - you're typing on a computer about how depressed and upset you are. Atleast you have a house under you, which some people don't. Some people would literally kill just to have a roof over their head, and you definately would not hear those people complain that they were depressed. Life is short, yes, and sometimes it can be lonely, depressing, irritating, etc. But when you look at what you have, compared to the guy you see every day on your way home from work, or school if you're not as old as some of us, you have it pretty good. He holds a sign that reads "Homeless and Hungry - Please Help", and meanwhile you roll your window up and try not to make eye contact. Maybe turn the radio up a little to tune him out altogether. You get home and Mom or Dad, or both, cook dinner and sit down with you each night to hear all about your day. Or if you are old like us (relax, just mean over 18 or 21) you might be the one sitting down with your children to hear them talk excitedly about the day they had. Just thinking of my family can usually cheer me up when I am feeling down. Also, giving money to that guy helps to make me feel a little better. \n\nJust think about your family, friends, your car, your stereo system, your last good hook-up, whatever makes you feel happy and better, when you are feeling down.
718911
You have to do a little research before trying to convince you dad to get treatment.  For example, it is quite likely that your dad has talked to the doctors and has more information than you at this point.  Cancer that has spread has no chance of cure. Chemotherapy can make a person very sick.  If he lives alone, there would not be anyone to take care of him if he gets chemo and feels like throwing up all the time.  So talk to him to get more information before trying to change his mind.
854669
Yeah, I understand, hon.  It's tough to lose a dad. I lost my dad when I was 24, and it wasn't easy for me either.  Was your dad ill, or was his death sudden?  We don't know why God chooses his special people to be with Him, but know that wherever he is, your dad is watching over you, protecting you from harm, and loving you.  Meantime, talk things over with your mom, and your brothers and sisters if you have any, or even your friends.  Talking about the good times you had with your dad really helps.  In time, the pain will be a lot less, and you'll just be left with good memories.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.  Good luck and God Bless!
757380
Listen to your mom.  I know it can be very hard to have feelings for someone, or something, that you just don't have feelings for.  But, in the case of your dad, as long as you give him respect, that will be good enough for now.  It doesn't matter if you love him or not, just go through the motions and see what happens.  One day you will marry and hopefully have children of your own.  You will want to live by example.  What you are doing for your father, even though he may totally not deserve it, will help you be a good teacher to your children. You will feel good about yourself and you won't look back with regret. He may not have been there for you, but you certainly don't ever want to be like him.  And by cutting him off, you would (in a way) be like him.  Don't do that to yourself, your family, or anyone else.  \n\nYou sound like you have a good heart and you want to do what's right.  It won't be easy, but it will pay off in the end.  Also, it's very common for teens to get mad at their parents...especially one who hasn't "been there" for them.  Why your dad didn't work harder on a relationship with you all these years, I don't know.  But my guess is he has treated you the same way he was treated by his own dad while he was growing up.  So I will repeat myself and say "Don't become like your dad."  This type of thing has a tendency to be passed down from generation to generation.  \n\nJust show respect to your dad.  Also, try to do something nice for him.  You may not want to at first, but when you see how he reacts, it will make you feel good.  And do it even if you feel he doesn't deserve it.  He will be happily surprised, and maybe even a feel a little guilty.  Surely he knows you have been upset with him.  Maybe he doesn't know how to make the relationship right. But, since you have a heart to try to work this out, one way or another, you may be the one that gets it back on track. How good you can, and will, feel about doing that.  \n\nGive your dad a second chance and see how he changes. But don't expect it to happen overnight.  After awhile, you will wonder how you ever "didn't love him" and eventually be so thankful that you "do love him."  You will be blessed in more ways than you know if you and your dad work through this.
1110773
So from you wrote, I get the impression that you agree with him.  What has happened to put you where you are at?  I will say that everything that is happening in your life is due to the choices and decisions that you are making.  I don't know your age so this makes it somewhat difficult but from the signs of it you must be a teen, since most teens feel this way.  Parents don't hate their children, and even though we want the best for our children we do make mistakes at times.  The thing you have to realize is we have walked the walk and talked the talk.  We have stumbled and made our own mistakes and don't want you to make the same ones, soooo we try to protect you from yourself the best that we know how as we stumble through this thing we call parenthood.\nIt is very difficult to let go as a parent and we end up frustrated because we don't want to even though we know we should.  It is very irritating to see and watch our children make decisions that we know are going to bring about pain, try to remember that even though it may seem like the thinks those things it probably because of the inability to let go.  \nYou sound like you aren't happy though and that is the begining.  Try sitting down and talking with you dad, try to mend the broken fence and find out why he feels the way he does. \nMake a decision to start making choices that will give you the dicipline and direction that you are seeking.  Set a plan of action up and try to follow it.  Make a list of things you want to accomplish then start with number one and work through it.\nDiscipline is what you father wants for you I'm sure, and half the battle may be that you just have not accepted that you want the same thing since you can tell it's messing up your life.  No matter what though............you're relationship with your father should be up there on your list of priorities.  He does love you even if he's failing miserable at showing it.  Talk, Talk, Talk..... I thought that this poem fits.\n\n>NAIL IN THE  FENCE\n\nThere once was a little boy who had  a\nbad temper. His  Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every  \ntime\nhe lost his  temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.  The\nfirst day the boy  had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next  few\nweeks, as he  learned to control his anger, the number of nails  hammered\ndaily gradually  dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold  his\ntemper than to  drive those nails into the fence.  Finally the day came  \nwhen\nthe boy didn't  lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and  the\nfather suggested  that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he\nwas able to hold his  temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally  \nable\nto tell his father  that all the nails were gone. The father took his son  \nby\nthe hand and led  him to the fence. He said,  "You have done well, my  son,\nbut look at the  holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same.  When\nyou say things in  anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put\na knife in a man and  draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say  \nI'm\nsorry, the wound  is still there. "  A verbal wound is as bad as a  physical\none.
1013722
Probably you, but for different reasons.\nKnow this, that you can overcome this pain. It does not seem it now, but there is nothing that you can't handle. Get out in the sun, keep your life going, as any parent would want this. talk to your dad, tell him how happy you were today, but you can still tell him that your sad about his condition. If I were in your shoes, I might tell my dad that I am going to accept what has happened, as there is nothing I can do about it, and I am going to make the best of the situation by being happy,for his sake and your's,  and talking with him. Life through us a curve-ball, but I am throwing it back and showing my strength. My dad would be proud of me for that, and your's will, too. Keep talking to him, and show him that you can make the best of this that you possibly can.