My friend is called Mike. Mike has a Mom. Mikes mom is very dirty I've been told. Anyone ever boned her?
357144
I pounded those cakes. Tell Mike I said thanks.
1088045
was arrested for public nudity while at a public\nwatershed in the country with my gf at the time.\nwhen we told her parents why we were late,her dad laughed so hard,we thought he would bust his gut !\ni miss you.please send i.m.or mail...t
487043
That would be my best friend of 15rys.  She knows about all there is to know about me...a close second would be my mom.  They are both wonderful people, but the friend doesn't judge as my mother would about my sexual escapades.  You just can't tell mom EVERYTHING!!!  My lover is learing as we go, but the relationship is still new and dont want to let him in on but so much at this point of time.
165909
I don't think insulting someone's mother is ever funny...  \nEspecially not funny if their mother is your mom!
436537
Was that you, you son of a b*tch.  \n\nI was sneaking over to my best friends house to get some off his wife while he was at work.  \n\nShe was rather bold when she invited me over in a whisper right in front of him and their young son to party.  I thought to myself - sh*t yeah,  all my smooth well rehearshed lines combined with those years in the gym had finally paid off.\n\nI had fantasized for years about exactly what I would do  with her and was prepared to take full advantage of the situation.  \n\nI dressed in my very best clothes that I had just picked up from the tailor and started over to her place.  \n\nAs I am crawling through some bushes (her and her husband live right behind me) rather stealthily, I hear this whirling noise so I look up.  All of a sudden, literally out of the blue,  f*cking splat!!!!!!!!!!!!\n\nA godd*m cake came crashing down all over me, my clothes, my flowers, and my 20 pack of condoms.  Everything was covered.  \n\nTo make it worse,  birds started swarming down on me like locust and apparently your f*cking cake gave them a case of the sh*its.  \n\nBy the time they had pecked all of the frosting off me, I was covered with whelps and looked like one of the gargoyles on Notre Dame cathedral, completely covered with runny bird sh*t.\n\nHaving just taken half a bottle of Viagra before I began this f*cking nightmare, nothing was going to stop me from relieving my now raging erection.  I persevered only to find out the b*tch was serious when she said come over and lets party.  \n\nIt was her 5 year olds birthday.\n\nA pretty lousy day all around - thanks for nothing you f*cker.
1044932
Well, there was this Yahoo Answers user who was being really mean to me, my sisters and my YA friends, she'd been emailing us, but when I mentioned it to a certain person, her emails stopped! Coincidence? Maybe. Oh, and there was the time my sisters put a hex on someone, that was fun!
675257
I cant tell you mine, but heres a shorty for my mom.\n\nMy mom started working at this warehouse driving forklift. She has been in and out of quiet a few relationships since she got this job. And there was a guy that had a huge crush on my mom. A full grown male with a crush, can you believe it. Anyways, he had a crush on my mom for two years and never had the guts to tell her how he felt. \n\nWell, my mom went into work and left people know that she was moving and would be looking for a new job. The thing is, she was already engaged to some other guy on the border of NY and PA. She thought that she loved him and that he was the one. They actually ended up breaking up later.\n\nThe guy from her work finally confessed in a love letter to my mom how much he really likes her and that he has had a major crush on her for two years. They started dating and things were going great. I think she has only been with him for about three years now. But they went out for the weekend to Busch Gardens and he purposed to my mom in the rain at a zoo. She thought it was so sweet. She said yes, an they got married two weeks ago.\n\n(To be honest I dont really like the guy, but he is my stepfather now so I guess I will have to try to learn to like him. He is the quiet and cranky type. The thing that bothers me the most is that his family owns a bar, and my mom said he wouldnt marry another alcoholic. Will see what happens though. This guy does like to drink, but not to the point where he gets drunk every weekend.)
1182254
I have told friends personal info over the years.  Nothing like "I was rapped as a small boy" type things.  More along the lines of "wow your mom is banging dude!"  They took it pretty well, and after a few days the swelling on my face went down, so everyone was happy :)  Hope that helped you.  But if you are looking into something like "I'm gay" just go ahead and tell them.  What's the worst that can happen?  He won't like you anymore?  Well, if he is a homophobic and you are gay, well them he wasn't a good friend anyway and you are better off without him.  Have I helped yet?  I hope so.
748359
From insultathon...LOVE IT\n\nI had your mother on toast last night. Then I regurgitated her and shot her. Twice. In the spine.\nI threw her into a lake of acid, and sharks with miniguns on their heads and RPG's on their fins. I pulled her out, and then...\nI raped her soul. And she liked it.\n\nI hope you rot in the deepest part of hell while having the micropenis on your forehead ripped to pieces by obese, bald, gingerpubed French whores with more STD's than you've had dinners, hot or cold.\n\nYou deserve to bleed from every orifice and have your testicles and eyes cut out, and your testicles put in your eye sockets and your eyes in your scrotum.\n\nOh, and by the way, your father was a ferret that your mother found at the roadside and boiled in her own rancid vaginal discharge. Sexually.\n\nF*ck's sake, you suck so much half the people that come in here to insult you can't even think of any insults more than two lines long! You know why? BECAUSE YOU KILL THEIR GODSDAMN'D BRAIN CELLS WITH YOUR FUGLINESS!!!\n\nConsider yourself insulted, you cocksucking, monkeyf*cking bastard son of a rabid Italian dinnerf*ck!\n\nI could add on a bit here about how I don't really hate you and I actually think you're practically a demigod, but you know what? I just can't be arsed.\n\nIn the words on millions of people all over the world,\n\nF*ck You.
932829
One such veteran, a friend of mine, has been cloned, reported mercilessly, and been deluged with derogatory remarks.\n\nI presume from people who are still being supported by mommy and daddy.
589107
Yes I was stabbed in the back by my ex best friend. I would give her rides to work and ask nothing in return. I would also lend her money when she and her children were hungry. One day I noticed her stomach started getting big, she told me she was pregnant by a guy named Timmy and then before having the baby, she admitted she was pregnant by my man! I was so hurt and shocked. I forgave her but things were never the same and slowly our friendship drifted apart. I still have the stab wound in my back!
865398
It was not a question...there are other forums out there, this is not one of them.\n\nSorry to hear about your friend.
283036
She rocks!\n\nMy husband has been doing that joke for years and it still cracks me up when he has a new 'victim'.
575296
It's not as big of a deal as you think, I'm sure of it. This is probably what happened: You're a curious 13-year-old girl, who like any girl your age, is curious about your developing body. I'm sure your friend is too and that's why this event occurred in the first place. It seems like harmless, non-sexual touching between two kids. After you had time to think about what happened you felt guilty because of the religious beliefs your mom probably raised you with. You immediately became fearful because you realized how shocked your mom would be if she learned you had touched another girl's breasts. That's why your mind is now racing with thoughts of getting caught and scolded. Fear always puts things out of perspective and I'm sure that's what's happening here. Think of it like this... Does your friend want her mom to find out either? Most likely not. So why would she tell on you? My advice is to relax and not worry yourself so much. You did not sin, you were simply acting like a 13-year-old girl. I did a lot of silly things when I was 13 too. If it still bothers you try talking the situation out with your friend. She could be just as freaked out about the same stuff as you are! Maybe you can both agree to forget the incident(s) and move on. Above all, don't feel guilty.
253348
ant93722 and jmom -- I don't think your replies were very nice or warranted -- especially when she was asking a question in an open forum for discussion.  You both could have been a little more respectful toward her instead of being rude to her.  Anyonoe is entitled to ask a question here and I'm sure what she meant was she wanted to see if others had this disease she is asking about, and what they might be going through and offer her advice.  No need to be complete dickheads about it.
768185
How does him telling you that you are a perv and to talk to your mother make him a pedo? Your silly question was crying out for a comment like that. Grow up!\n\nYou've just managed 3 violations here - Not asking a question, chatting and insulting other participants!
409188
Bre: Her parents came when they heard about her and her son. They tried to get them to make peace with each other but it didn't work. Her parents had decided to take him with them until they found out he was gay and they also took his trust fund away so now he's stuck with Bre.\n\nGabrielle: Being so superficial she was trying to get a nanny for the baby. Carlos wouldn't have it. So she would secretly have that new maid take care of the baby. Then she accidently left the baby in the house alone forgetting that she had gave the maid the day off. once she realized it she raced home and felt so bad she couldn't put the baby down.\n\nSusan: Her daughter was pissed at her once she found out that Carl was trying to reconcile and bailed on the plans to go to the movies. Susan went alone but when she saw Mike walk in with a date she convinced a stranger to pretend to be her date. The stranger later on advices her against getting back with Carl because he felt he was being a coward. Susan dumps Carl but then Carl lied to Susan saying that he had left Edie but he hadn't and Susan slept with him. Of course when she found out the truth she was pissed.\n\nLynette: One of the twins was obssessed with vaginas and was asking random females to show him in exchange for a treat (cookie, popsicle). She had gotten advice to shame him into thinking it was wrong and dirty and sinful to think about it. But she couldn't bear herself to do it so she bought him a puppy to take his mind off of it. It worked.\n\nPaul Young/ Zach: Mrs. Huber is now doing all types of dirty things to Paul to piss him off. She replaced his lighter fluid with gasoline, put some slippery substance on his front porch, and arranged to have his house tented/fumigated for termites while he and Zach were still inside.