My husband is bipolar and doesn't respect, show concern, emotions etc.  We are 51  and 46.?
81397
The word "bipolar" is simply a label used to categorise a list of psychosocial traits that Psychiatry considers to be improper or abnormal in society. Psychiatry defines these traits as a "mental illness", and promotes it as a "disease" that requires "treatment".\n\nIt is not a "disease", despite claims or implications made by certain psychiatric and pharmaceutical organisations. There is NO credible scientific evidence that shows the existence of what constitutes "bipolar" as a biological/neurological disorder, brain abnormality or "chemical imbalance".\n\n"For a disease to exist there must be a tangible, objective physical abnormality that can be determined by a test such as, but not limited to, blood or urine test, X-Ray, brain scan or biopsy. All reputable doctors would agree: No physical abnormality, no disease. In psychiatry, no test or brain scan exists to prove that a 'mental disorder' is a physical disease. Disingenuous comparisons between physical and mental illness and medicine are simply part of psychiatry's orchestrated but fraudulent public relations and marketing campaign." Fred Baughman, MD., Neurologist & Pediatric Neurologist.\n\n"Chemical imbalance…it’s a shorthand term really, it’s probably drug industry derived… We don’t have tests because to do it, you’d probably have to take a chunk of brain out of someone - not a good idea." Dr. Mark Graff, Chair of the Committee of Public Affairs for the American Psychiatric Association. July, 2005.\n\nSymptoms that psychiatry labels as "bipolar" (or it's related disorders), can stem from any number of variable sources. Many people, for example, have overcome "bipolar" through megavitamin therapy and effective nutrition. A growing wealth of evidence supports that underlying nutritional deficiencies can cause even the most severe mental disorders, including symptoms labelled as "schizophrenia" [See source refs]\n\nBottom line? Psychiatry is a belief-system, a "faith", not a science. Despite the huge marketing strategies, the so-called "research" and all the propaganda thrown at the world, there is not one iota of scientific evidence that proves that "schizophrenia" or ANY mental illness, in fact, exists as an actual --medical disease--.\n\nIf you have been told differently then know this: You have been lied to.\n\nFor more information, please visit:\n\nhttp://groups.msn.com/psychbusters\nDecoding Psychiatric Propaganda\n\nFor information on non-drug / alternative approaches:\n- http://www.alternativementalhealth.com/articles/default.htm#B\n- http://www.pendulum.org/articles/articles_misc_lisaalt.html\n- http://www.truehope.com/_empowerplus/empowerplus.asp\n- http://www.mentalhealthproject.com/content.asp?id_Content=1575
284032
I warn my husband about this all the time.  I feel me and him don't have a deep mutual understanding of each other.  You know how with some people you have that love and understnading and emotional connection and with others you don't.  he and I don't have that - thought we did but we rushed into the marriage.  I keep telling him that if he continues to be that way - he complains and argues about everything that I am interested in and criticizes me for the way I do things ..doesn't understand the real me. We just doesn't have that real true love "connection" as your wife calls it and "emotional" understanding for one another ... he has no idea what i mean when i explain this to him; I tell him he's gonna be the guy that 10 years down the road the wife will say "i want a divorce" and the entire time he would never see it coming and would wonder "where did I go wrong - i thought everything was fine" ... but you know what .. I commend you for reading books and seeing a counselor.  I try to read books about this stuff to my husband and he gets mad and defensive or he'll just ignore what I'm reading to him.  If she doesn't give you that chance to work it out then she is just fed up and there is no hope.  Give her a little more time - although she probably feels less hurt becasue she knows you are still wanting to be with her so she's not scared about this time apart.  If you were to act like her and accept it - then it would scare her.  When I threaten to leave sometimes and he is beggin for me not to, I feel the urge to leave even more because I know I have the upper hand and he's wrong.  But .. if he would act like he wouldn't care for ex: one time he said "fine I'll pack your bags for you" I felt really vulnerable and hurt but it scared me ... and we ended up making up instead of me leaving.   Take everyones advice - just take it day by day - you'll be fine and she'll come around - if its over just let it go .. use what you have learned to help you out later.  Just note that women need emotional attention and understanding- we are weird like that.
38167
You may not be able to get him back.  He maybe tired of the back and forth. \n\nNow, is it possible to have bipolar and be in a relationship?  Yes, my sister is bipolar and married and has kids.  She had to do a lot of work to keep her emotions on track and it sounds like you may need to work on your emotions to stop the ups and downs. \n\n1. Take your medications. Don't fool around with them.  Make sure you see your doctor and counselors when schuduled and be honest with them about how you are feeling.  Many bipolar people love to get that slight manic high, the only problem is that can easily get out of control and you are spinning out control emotionally. \n2. Don't drink.  Don't do street drugs.  Neither will help your moods. \n3. Try to keep to a routine. Try to go to bed around the same time and get up at the same time.  Try to have a plan and stick to it.  \n4. Exercise. It has been shown to help relieve depression and tension. \n\nTry to learn your moods and try to calm yourself before you get too angry at your boyfriend.  Take time to reflect on what is happening in your life, like journaling or blogging to try to see patterns in your moods and life. \n\nBut consider one thing.  It's possible that you and your boyfriend aren't a good fit.  He may not be the right person for you and that may be why you get so angry at him.  Is he really good for you?  Is he really what you want out of life?\n\nYou can work to stablize your moods.  Just remember to take good care of yourself.
125815
i think all you can do is tell him how you feel about it all, explain that "we" need to work on things not just "me" if after explaining,(if he lets you finish explaining), he still seems to putting the blame on you then don't bother trying anymore. life is too short to live with drama that never ends. maybe it will take you leaving for him to change or maybe he won't change at all.
912252
My hubby did that for the longest time too.  I finally told him we needed counseling.  Now after nearly 10 years together we can sit down and talk about it.  We've made it a priority to never go to sleep with each other angry.  I've also been more verbal about why I am upset etc.  Some guys think that if they hug you etc then woman are okay. It has taken us some time but we are closer than when we first said our vows.  If both of you go to counseling together and separately you can learn how to talk to one another.  Don't make the mistake of assuming or thinking he should know how you feel.  Communication is not always easy but you are right to say it is important.  You need to ask him why he doesn't talk to you about it.  You shouldn't shun your emotions either.  Just talk to him whether he wants to hear or not.  Tell him how you feel but try not to make him feel cornered.  It's hard when you are newly married isn't it?  It all boils down to both of you not understanding the other.  It can be that way in all relationships.  I hope you guys work things out and seek counseling of some kind.  Good luck and congratulations.
698078
Bipolars usually don't think there is anything wrong with them...they think it is everything else. They will not get help until they see it themselves and choose too. Just be supportive and loving.
779961
I am Bipolar II, and I have encounted only courage from others during my bad times.\n\nHispanics like any other race, are just people, and all people have their own veiws on mental illness.\n\nHave you talked to him about how it makes you feel when he jokes about the way you have felt?\n\nHas he been educated in anyway about mental illness?\n\nBe strong and don't take to heart his misguided and immiture response to your needs.
1035283
I know how you feel.  My husband used to be the same way.  It is a horrible way to live, isn't it?  Just remember that he has a problem and needs help.  Divorce was not an option for me so I stuck it out, hoping that he would change.  He did.   With a little maturing, antidepressants (for both of us I might add) and patience, we made it.\nI always wanted the kind of marriage my mom and dad have.   Loving, caring for one another, laughter and respect.  It took many years, but I finally got it.  We have been married 29 years this year.  It was soooo difficult though.  But well worth the wait.  Please try to talk to your husband about antidepressants.  It really helps my husband not be so angry and irritable all the time.  If you don't feel like you take it anymore (and I know how that is, too)  talk to someone.  It can help more than you realize.  If I can help in some way, please send me an e-mail.  I would be glad to listen.  I didn't have anyone that I felt comfortable enough with to tell all the sorted details to.  Didn't want mom and dad to know how bad things really were.  Good luck and I will say a little prayer for you and your family....:)
1146329
Make a time to sit down and talk with him---try to do this with as few distractions as possible. Find out what kind of support he wants. Since he's complaining, insist that he be specific. After you've listened to him, then make sure he listens to you. Be specific about the support you are providing, and also tell him your needs. This is your turn to be specific. Write everything down, compare lists, and try to come up with compromises. This might help disarm the negative emotions. Just because he's in pain, doesn't mean he should be disrespectful and ungrateful. You can be sympathetic for his pain, and still take up for yourself. You and your husband are modeling an adult relationship for your children.
546567
It is very clear that he has a short fuse. He doesnt handle responsibility at all and he feels like you dont do much. You should probably explain to him in a nice clear firm voice what you are feeling like and what you need from him and you may want to ask him if there is something that you are doing to make him act this way. To every action is a re-action. You both have to be willing to work at the relationship and you will always be working at it. All you can do is make sure you are doing everything you can to make him happy and make sure he really fully understands what your needs are from him. Then you go from there, if he doesnt listen to you and your doing everything he needs from you and he comtinues then you need to go to the next step which would be counseling. Basically if he is not willing to put forth any effort to make your life better and happier then you really do not have a marriage there. And then at that point you may want to play the hard role , if all else fails you can just act as though you dont need him. Start going and doing things on your own and with the kids and do everything else as far as the household but dont pay as much mind to him. ( Start moving on with your life) That may very well stop him in his tracks. Start doing to him what he does to you and if he really does love and care for you he will see it and just tell him "thats what you've been going through and you only done it to make him see it first person."
870892
I know it's hard because I know how you feel sort of!  I haven't had the same problems but I got married quite young.  I'm an American so I didn't start parting till I was 21 and got married at 22.  I sometimes watch shows about Ibiza and so on and like why can't I go there?  Plus, I have problems in my head from High School and everytime I try to talk to my husband he is like "Your'll get over it!"  Still he knows when I need to talk and he'll listen.  So sent down with you husband and tell him what is going on before you get depressed!
1027468
lose my temper and doubt my spouse
826608
Honesty is the BEST policy...\n\nTalk to him about what's bothering you...otherwise...what is he suppose to do? He can't read your mind. \n\nMy husband works his butt off too and comes home, showers, eats and sleeps...gets up the next day, goes to work, comes home, showers, eats and sleeps...and so on.\n\nI feel the same way you do at times, but we need to understand, (which we both do) that he is tired and drained.  This does NOT interpret that he does not love you or find you unattractive...he's just tired.\n\nTry scheduling something for you and him on his day(s) off something special to do...don't wait for him...just do it.\n\nPray for courage and uplifting...\nTry to get some sleep... :)
940641
Honey, he is classic bi-polar.  They think they are "ok" and stop the meds cause they "don't need them".  It will never change.  It will always be the same for you, sad to say.  But be encouraged, because it's not your fault.  None of it.  If he gets out of line again, have his ass comitted.  Put him in lock down or something or get out of the relationship.  I know how you feel (personal experience) and you will always be the blame for everything.  Bi-polars have no empathy for anyone and it's all about "them".  If you don't have children, leave.  If you do, it's just a matter of time before you do leave.  Godloveya and prayers for your strength.
1138966
Girl you need to do whats right for you and your kids.If you feel like he's not taking you seriously then you have to figure out if its really a problem for you if so you need to let him know this is how you feel, and if he's still acting like he don't care then girl get up and do it.I know he's your husband but don't let nobody stop you from doing something you want to do.Sounds like he trying to keep you on lock..
667629
Wow. Simliar to what I'm going through but except with cheating with the brother. I'm 20 and I noticed that since me and my ex bf had a age gap of nearly 12 years it was hard for us to work out our problems. He loves you and he doesn't want to lose you. Maybe your husband and his brother should talk this matter over. There might be rage but it's better then losing someone that you may never see again due to unforeseen future ahead of one. Before me and my ex ended our relationship I told him about how hurt I was that he treated me like "shit". He took the time to understand what he was doing to hurt me. You can try talking it over with him. If matters aren't resolve, I think it would be wise to end the relationship and move on. It's wrong for you to have to put up with his "shit". I'm truly sorry that you are going through this but we do learn from our mistakes. Good luck.
505136
I don't intend to me mean, but it sounds like the issue is yours and not his.  Okay - so he isn't as affectionate, but he sounds affectionate enough.\n\nHe isn't the same guy he was years ago.  Let's face it, the testosterone levels of a 20-yr. old would kill him today.  His body just couldn't take it.\n\nLook - talk to him about it - let him know your needs.  It sounds like he will do what he can to accommodate.  However, if he really loves you and takes good care of your kid, you have it better than 90% of the rest of us.  Be happy in that.\n\nGood luck.\nC