Help me, I'm trapped in the computer!!!?
149567
*grabs you kicks you out window* there you go happy now?
814004
THROW THE MAC OUT THE WINDOW AND GET A COMPUTER WITH MICROSOFT FAST BEFORE IT TAKES OVER YOUR BRAIN!!!!!
300164
Reinstall windows u can recover.\n\nU havent said what is happening now without giving details of current behaviour giveing recovery ideas is very difficult So pl explain.
991743
step one: turn off the computer......
587952
Delete everything permanently from your computer, reinstall XP.\n(don't put a password again)
170862
yes! i am in desperate need of help...
51469
1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt. \n\n\n2. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you. \n\n\n3. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the damn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes, turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour. \n\n\n4. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly. \n\n\n5. Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to different screen than the one it's set up with.\n\n\n6. Write a program that plays the "Smurfs" theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over & over again. \n\n\n7. Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk. \n\n\n8. Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon files. \n\n\n9. Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don't know. \n\n\n10. Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you turn it on. \n\n\n11. Bring a chainsaw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously. \n\n\n12. Type on VAX for a while. Suddenly start cursing for 3 minutes at everything bad about your life. Then stop and continue typing. \n\n\n13. Enter the lab, undress, and start staring at other people as if they're crazy while typing. \n\n\n14. Light candles in a pentagram around your terminal before starting. \n\n\n15. Ask around for a spare disk. Offer $2. Keep asking until someone agrees. Then, pull a disk out of your fly and say, "Oops, I forgot." \n\n\n16. Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes. \n\n\n17. "DISK FIGHT!!!" \n\n\n18. Start making out with the person at the terminal next to you (It helps if you know them, but this is also a great way to make new friends). \n\n\n19. Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting the keys with the straw. \n\n\n20. If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required. \n\n\n21. Draw a picture of a woman (or man) on a piece of paper, tape it to your monitor. Try to seduce it. Act like it hates you and then complain loudly that women (men) are worthless. \n\n\n22. Try to stick a Ninetendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it doesn't work, get the supervisor. \n\n\n23. When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it on, ask loudly where the smiling Apple face is when you turn on one of those. \n\n\n24. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, then when its all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line. \n\n\n25. Sit and stare at the screen, biting your nails noisily. After doing this for a while, spit them out at the feet of the person next to you. \n\n\n26. Stare at the screen, grind your teeth, stop, look at the person next to you. Grinds some more. Repeat procedure, making sure you never provoke the person enough to let them blow up, as this releases tension, and it is far more effective to let them linger. \n\n\n27. If you have long hair, take a typing break, look for split ends, cut them and deposit them on your neighbor's keyboard as you leave. \n\n\n28. Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you. \n\n\n29. Come to the lab wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and place them of top of the monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape them around the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty of cotton on plastic. \n\n\n30. Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper
883567
OHHHHH...I am...trying. Cant...help...myself...fingers moving...toward key board...AAAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGG! I cant tell you what you really dont want to know but i can tell you that i cant seem to figure out why i am typing randomly like this. i think that i have a computer virus in my finger tips and i cant stop!aaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggggg!
929690
open  my computer .right hit on ur hard drive ( C )
612344
Next time you try to open something on the net...hold down the Ctrl button when you click.\n\nGood Luck
44157
Get your IP address of the computer you are on, and contact someone to find out where you are. Then you can be rescued.
833575
make sure your computer is plugged in!!
708693
Bring your computer to technician. For now, you can right click your "Programs" on your start menu and click explore / open to open your programs. \n\nHope it can help.
527210
Try to use a differant computer!
66167
Well, here you are again. Are you okay? Do you need medication? Take it easy...I would get away from your computer and take a long walk outside.
350865
I had this same exact problem last week!\n\nOKAY... Here is what you do:\n\n1- go to START at the bottom left of the screen.\n2- go up to PROGRAMS\n3- go up to ACCESSORIES\n4- go to SYSTEM TOOLS\n5- go to DISK DEFRAGMENTER\n6- make sure (c:) is highlighted (in beige)\n7- click on the DEFRAGMENT button at the bottom of the screen\n8- let the computer finsih the entire process by itself \n9- restart your computer and magically you can reply again!\nGOOD LUCK :-)
499710
fiddle around with a pen or object like that in the keyhole.  how did u get locked in anyway?  or u can IM someone 2 come n get u out.