why do people think i am so strong since my 4mo old greatgrandson passed in dec and my 32 yr old daughter died
148874
You are strong because you are able to type your question. That is an indication that you able to function in other capacities as well. You are feeding and caring for your other relatives and yourself? You are doing well and ARE strong. On the flip side, you could be in bed, feeling sorry for yourself and not eating or caring. You could be typing to us Yahoo-ers terrible rotten things, but your not, you sound STRONG. Stay strong, stay busy, and always always remember its ok to cry.
527622
Sorry to hear that. I would talk to the nurses who are caring for your daughter, their there toprovide support to your daughter and you. ALso different trusts have support workers, group to help family. Try talking to your daughter, I understand you proberly feel as though you need to be strong for her but i expect she petrified and maybe you opening up to her will help her discus her feeling. Dont forget about support groups such as samaritans who can give you an ear to listen to your feelings.
428101
i only knew my great-grandmother. she took care of me every day when i was little, but she died when i was 8.  it was cool because she was 80 years older than me which is a whole world of difference.  she could remember back to the turn of the century (1900, not 2000 of course).  she told me stories all the time about how the world was when she was little.  she really valued teaching children nursery rhymes, bible songs, and stories of the past.  i think she was really important in shaping the values i still have. also, i have lots of respect and some sympathy for old people now b/c of her.  it's got to be sad to be old and be living in a world that is so unfamiliar to you and where you don't really feel like you are a valued part of society.  i really miss her even today, but i'm so grateful that i knew her.  i'm sorry you missed out on that, maybe, hopefully, you'll be around to know your own great-grandchildren adn you can make good memories for them like i have.
894753
I have the clincher\nWe were at my grandfathers funeral and I don't talk to my moms side of the family much.  So I have not seen these people in like 8-10 years and we are sitting the the chapel at the funeral home and my Aunt pokes me from behind and when I turned around and asked her exactly why she felt the need to poke me (we are not talking adolescence here shes 65+) he answer " I was just checking to see how fat you were"  My mom scooped me in and whizzed me out of there onto the front steps before i could react to her.  how DARE you say that to anyone let alone someone that she has not seen in 10 years....
418774
Congratulations on your strong spirit. You should know you've crossed a great distance to being an adult, and rightly so.\n\nI lost my dad when I was 14, and it was hard. Real hard. However, in your case, you have no one of your parents left to comfort you anymore. Just knowing that is your first step into being a real human. God is testing you, and He will make it up for you, if not in this life, well, that's why we believe in Him.\n\nNo one can say anything to make you feel better. Many will try though, but look around, what about the maimed victims of war who lost their entire families? What about millions of poor individuals who know someday they're going to die a slow death, and that day isn't far away? God is testing them as well, believe me, the only thing that can help you is faith, faith in God, and in yourself.\n\nBe strong, and know you are not alone. Focus on your studies, and every time your eyes fill with tears from memories, let it be. Strong men also cry. It only makes them stronger.\n\nRegards,
755990
This is my miracle story. Last year my grandmother who took care of me my whole life became really ill. I was called by my sister who asked me to ride with her to see our grandmother and say good-bye. When arriving at the hospital we were greeted by our whole family. Everyone sobbing saying this was it grandma was leaving us. My grandmother is 86 years old so it wasn't a huge shock to my husband that she would be ready to die. I did not feel like she nor I were ready. I went in to see her and I sobbed. She grabbed my hand and said she loved me and that she would be fine. She was put on a breathing machine that night and signed off support two days later. She got better and did not die like everyone thought. I knew she was going to be fine. I was the only one who knew. We had a 4th of July party this weekend and she was there to eat and laugh with us. My grandmother and I have a wonderful bond along with my sister. I will know when she is ready to go I know she will make sure I am ready. That is my miracle.
459180
My father died 19 years ago this September. I was 14 year old. We talk about him often but only in fun stories. The 1st anniversary of his death my family including my mom's sisters and my cousins came into town. \nAfter that the years following they did not. I think it was they way my family does it. If that makes sense.\n\nIn answer to your question is I remember my friends and what they did. they called me to let me know they were thinking of me. They did not say I am here for you but just called to say hi like it was any normal day. If I wanted to talk about with them I did if not I didn't. I did it both ways.  but knowing my friends were thinking of me helped. Remember not to say oh how are you doing today. Just call them or if you feel comfortable go over and say hi stick around but also know when to leave. Ask your mother a lady always knows when to leave.\nThe ironic thing about my fathers death day was when I found out I was pregnant I told the doctor that there was one day he could not choose for my baby to be due and that was the day. we fibed to my family and friends and told them the baby was due the day before the anniversary of the day he died. my doctor remembered that I did not want my baby born on that day and he told me that he wanted to induce me so I did not have to be reminded. Isn't that neat that he remembered I did not even have to ask and he was a very bust doctor.\n\nGood Luck and I am sorry for your loss it does get better.
372124
Every one has a special thing about them. Yours is the ability beyond the unknown. I have always felt, ever since my first memory, that I was different. Apparently, my Mother knew it too, even before I was aware of the "gift". I was always told not to encourage the power I possessed, but that was like telling a bird not to fly. I dream all the time. Most of my dreams come true or have messages in them for me to deliver to others. I am constantly visited by the dead. In fact 2 nights ago, my son-in-law's grandmother let me know she had passed on. I had never even met her. When my daughter called to tell me the next day I was already aware of her passing. I feel people's pain too. This is hard to deal with, because there is so much of it out there. I also can smell death. I usually pick up on this just days before it happens. I am never quite sure who is going to die, but it always happens. Some people stay away from me because I scare them. Others cling to me, in hopes that I will have a message for them from someone they have lost or can tell them something about their future. I am not a fortune teller, a sooth saver, clairvoyant nor am I a medium. There is a name for us that picks up on others emotions, dead or alive, but I can't recall it. I will try and find it again, and get back with you. As far as what does this mean and why you?...there is no answer for that. Just get comfortable with this and try to understand what it is you are given. I know for a fact, that I was called to tell you this, but I don't fully understand it either. Just keep me in mind and if you have other questions, I will try and help you find the answers. This gift is a full time job, but I like to keep it in tack quitely because of all the commotion it causes. I know this much, I was not sent to help everyone, but everyone that knows I have this, thinks I should be there for them and when I have nothing to offer them, they think I am "full of it". But it just doesn't work that way. Or at least mine doesn't. I guess there are level of degrees for this. Anyway, don't be scared. Don't get ancie, and just because you make a call that you feel is totally heads up and it doesn't pan out, don't quit believing in yourself, because its not always in plain sight what is happening. In other words this can be very complicated when played out, and usually its nothing like what you might of dreamed and thought it was. Its all symoblic and it takes time to interpet it, and because it doesn't make sense to us, doesn't mean it want make sense to the person it is meant for. Walk in the dark, but never be alone.
395689
everyone is different.  however long it takes you to get back on your feet, it could be 6months, it could be a year. but whenever that time comes there is no need to continue to be in mourning, of course you should never try to forget the death of a loved one.  but moving on is necessary both for you and the children.  just take it slow, and things will fall into place.  she wouldn't have wanted you to continue to live lonely.
854669
Yeah, I understand, hon.  It's tough to lose a dad. I lost my dad when I was 24, and it wasn't easy for me either.  Was your dad ill, or was his death sudden?  We don't know why God chooses his special people to be with Him, but know that wherever he is, your dad is watching over you, protecting you from harm, and loving you.  Meantime, talk things over with your mom, and your brothers and sisters if you have any, or even your friends.  Talking about the good times you had with your dad really helps.  In time, the pain will be a lot less, and you'll just be left with good memories.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.  Good luck and God Bless!
1153707
the "powers that be" know how much you can handle and it's usually lots more than what you think you can.  \n\nI have been through hell in the last 18 months and have learned that I am lots stronger than I ever though myself to be.  \n\nKeep praying, and believe in yourself.  And SMILE!
938910
I guess I can say I've learned that I'm a stronger person then what I thought I was.  Almost died twice and recovered, once when I was a child and once when I became an adult.  I had my third child when I was 26 and two months later have my  husband fired and my son diagnosed with terminal cancer all in the same week.  So no money, no insurance, a new baby and two other kids, one of which was dying.  Yeah I'm a strong person, if I can live thru that, I can live thru anything.  I can be bent but I can't be broken.  I've also found that no matter how far down I may get, there's still always room to show compassion and caring for other people, even if it's only in the form of a few simple words or a friendly smile.  I've also learned that no one is perfect and no one's opinion of me matters more than my opinion of myself.
689841
I was 9 when I lost my mom. Not an important event goes by without me thinking of her and missing her. Im 28 and sometimes I get mad at HER for not being here for things like her grandchildren or to give me advice. It DOES get easier. I say this because the pain only goes on for so long then you adjust to it. Pain will be there it just won't be as horrible as it seemed in the beginning. I just hope to see her someday when its my time. It sucks more than anything in the world to lose a parent. My advice is n to see a counsler or better yet find others who have lost parents and share stories and tears if need be. Your on a good start here finding others. Maybe there is a loss support group in your area. I didn't like the counslers when I was younger due to the fact we had no connection. They didn't lose their mom but wanted to talk to me about my loss. Good-luck and keep your head up. Remember God doesn't give us more then we can handle (sometimes it feels like it)
1160167
My mom just passed away may 20th, My mom was a wonderful, loving, kind person with a fantastic sense of humor, everyone liked her! She would talk to just about anyone, complete strangers, She was still young and full of life with a weak heart, she was a mother, grandmother, wife several times, best friend, daughter, aunt, cousin, she was just about everything at some point in her life. My mother was more than a mom to me, she was my absolute best friend, my confident, my copilot, my  teacher ,manager,  doctor, etc...I am sure you must get it, she was everything to me. My mom was one of a kind that is for sure, her unique laugh and smile, personality, I am my mothers daughter! To know her was to love her!
337635
I was 40 when my mom died. Today I'm 46 and still every once in a while I become very sad and even cry on occasion.  You were only 8 and you are now only 15.  The point I am trying to make is that the death of someone very close to us is difficult no matter our age at the time. But when you are a child you really don't understand all that is happening. Now as you mature and approach your adult life there are probably some issues about your grandfather and/or his death that were unresolved.  When you were 8 you were not prepared to deal with them.  Now you are able to and so your mind is letting them come up again. Our minds are strange things sometimes at night they dream things that scare the hell out of us. At other times they protect us from the things that really will hurt us.  I know that this is troubling for you and feel you need professional help to deal with it. Like others before me, I suggest you seek that help. Your parents and your doctor are good places to start.\n\nHope this helps you and Good Luck!
3065
My mom had me when she was almost 43; I am perfectly normal.  However, my mom also just died in April, & I have to agree with the previous answer in regard to thinking into the future.  My children had their grandma for too short a time, but they enjoyed every moment spent with her to the fullest.  My parents also adopted my brother as a baby when my mom was 49.  She kept up with everything just fine.  Good luck.
210648
It just seems like they are hard on you, in the long run it will all be worth it. You will be a better person for it. You won't let anyone run all over you, and you will stand up for what you believe in. Just look at it like they are molding you into a very responsible human being.