i think its my falt that my parents are getting a devorce. should i feel that way?
141052
It is not your fault.  This was between the two of them, and to be honest, is it possible that they are breaking up because they love you, and don't wish you to suffer their arguments any longer?  It still wouldn't be your fault, and this way you can get to experience each of your parents in a completely different and loving way with you.  I hope it works for you.  It's difficult but you can get through this with an open heart that your parents are doing the absolute best they know how.
904676
I think that you should respect your parents call on this one hun...sorry.  You are only 13, and your parents love you and are protecting you from experiances that you are not yet ready to handle.
946169
I wouldn't say there's something wrong with you. It sounds like your anger had more to do with something a lot deeper than going shopping with your parents.\n\nDo your parents make you feel left out or do you have other anger issues with your parents? If so, it could help a lot if you start speaking up to them in a respectful way and letting them know how you're feeling. Sometimes it can be really hard for people to ask for things that they want but with practice it becomes easier. \n\nIf the reason you got angry was because they didn't ask you, well you have to remember that people aren't mind readers. Sometimes we all fall into the trap of expecting other people to do something for us or ask something of us. But the fact is that people often just don't know; even people that we're very close to.\n\nTry to figure out what it is you were really angry about and then see if there's a pattern to your anger. If you often react to anger in an extreme way, like hitting things, then you may want to talk to someone about it and find ways to deal with your anger in a more healthy and constructive way.\n\nBe good to yourself and take care
422581
they are trying to protect u, sweetie. my mom and dad used to give me a hard time, too, but i realized why now since i've grown up. they are trying to protect u from any dangers that might be able to hurt u in any way. u will realize it when u grow a little older. trust me.
689899
You never truly get over it but the first step is to realize that the relationship you want with your parents will probably never happen.  Your expecting something from people who have proven to you over and over they are not capable of affection of making you feel needed.  All you are doing be this is setting yourself up for more heartache and disappointment which you will blame on them thus forcing a bigger divide between you and your parents.  You have to learn to be happy with what relationship you do have and not to expect from them what they can't give.  If you are content with that and follow this then you can have a relationship with your parents.  It may not be the kind of relationship you would like but it is all you can get so either accept it or move on without them.
1156247
have you ever tell you dad how you felt about his attitude?\nhave your mum ever spoke to you of how she felt about the situation?\nyou know,i advise that you'd better see a counselor .Pour our your feelings to the counselor.He/she will be able to help you cope with the current situation you' re facing.\nI know your family must have meant a lot to you.And I suppose you're a growing up child.I agree the current situation affects your life and you other family members but please remember one thing do not let those things to pollute your mind or affect your studies.\nMost importantly get a professional help.\ncheer up ok.I wish you all the best.
776029
Depending on the situation. When my parents are older I feel they should be the responsibilty of me and my siblings. The way I see it, they spent quite a few years looking after us, so we should do the same for them.
455307
parents back then were that type of persons with their families, and they just were raised themselves that way and is not your mother's fault, but her, mother, and then her mother of her mother...and so on....nonetheless, you can make the change with your family and with you followed generations to come.....in your case, I can see that you have these hateful feelings about your mom, and brothers....Remember that things happens for one reason, you don't know why it happened the way it happened, but thank God, you are ok, even though you feel these feelings.....Try to forget if you can, try to do well to others and always, talk to others, the way you were treated like that others wont do what your mom did to you, and let this experience be of good use to others and forget all bad feelings and live a healthy life you and your family, God bless you and if you could Get a bible study..Good luck.
938491
You are only feeling the way you do because of the idea of leaving everything that you have come to know and love. I am alot older than you I am sure, but I have moved about 8 times when I was young. We as kids had no say in where we were going and I for one hated everytime we moved I had just made new freinds. If your father feels like this is the best thing for the family and it will improve whatever lifestyle you have I say relax , go with the flow and when you are old enough to get out on your own and you really don't like where you are you can make that change. But as for right now, If it is going to make all of your lives better I say go for it. Seems like your parents are doing whats best for the whole family and KUDOS to DAD for including everyones say in the matter. Good Luck!
842939
Sweetheart, the problems of your parents are exactly that-their problems.  You are not a cause of it.  I know that you feel like they don't care about you but they choose to have you, I am sorry they yell at you.  Try talking to your school counselor or your pastor.  You are not to blame.  But sweetie, if you run away you don't make the situation any better for anyone.  Life on the streets isn't pretty, you will get hurt!  Please stay home and talk to someone first and if nothing changes there are other alternatives.  Please don't do it.   Someone does care!!
493818
As a kid myself, I see it from your side. However, make sure you realize that they just want you to realize that "lowering the expectations you have for yourself is not the right path to take." (My parents...rrr...)
883835
Ive got the same problem with my -- 'out-laws' But luckily for me they are going abroad this year so we are safe. Next year might be different though cos we've had some turbulent times and I dont think I will ever feel the same about them again.\n\nI would try and keep it nice for the children we have but if it weren't for them I wouldn't be bothering.
1186812
You said you and your parents don't get along. Does this mean you do not love them? I am sure you do. turn the tables and think about your question. \n\nyou go to bed tonight and when you wake up your parents are gone - they didn't bother to tell you and didn't leave a note as to where they were. \n\nwould you be worried? would you be hurt? would you feel like maybe they should have told you? I think that would be a yes. \n\nand you know that no matter what you love your parents and would not want them to worry about what happened to you. \n\nYou going to college so this tells me your smart - I think maybe you could if you really wanted to find ways to improve the relationship you have with your parents. \n\nbest of luck.
1093587
I can tell you from experience it isn't easy.  However, I now have the advantage of being much older and am able to look back on the situation a bit more objectively.  First off, realize that this has nothing to do with you and their love for you.  This is a relationship problem between the two of them that you did not cause and you can do nothing about.  Next, continue to love your parents equally and do everything you can to make this as easy for them as possible.  Take time to talk to them and don't be afraid to let them know how you are feeling and ask them questions about what is going on if you need to.  Don't let this situation control your life, life will still go on and in a basic sense, nothing really is going to change all that much for you in the long run.
225343
You can start looking at why they are making you stressed: Is it the nagging? Your parents care for you, but it and can be a down right pain - been there, done that, and screaming at them never worked.  They may not be aware of your inner feelings. Have you tried telling them what the effect of their behaviour is having on you?  You will need to be calm when you discuss this! so onto the next comments:\nTo calm down: Find a quiet spot away from the parents then do abdominal breathing exercises (see source below, or a school counsellor may be able to help you on this)\nTo relax: you can read a book, play an instrument, do something that you enjoy.  Or you can practice yoga and meditation (the techniques are good - you don't need to worry about the religious side of it).  These two exercises when practiced regularly will help you to cope with outside stresses much more readily, since they exercise your body and your mind. Meditation will also help with concentration - something that's useful for school!  But with all things, discuss with your parents on the suitability.\nA word of caution - drugs are not your answer - they will only add to your problems!
726723
listen to your parents....they actually know what they are doing. its for your own good. you'll thank him one day. trust me. i was your age only a few years ago...and sometimes i wish that i had obeyed my parents more...i would be a lot better off i think.
159735
Do not loose yourself to tensions my sister. If already nothing has gone wrong, try to get a job first. Be positive. When you have a job you will have some authority. Then it would be easier for you to convinvence your parents. Parents too love you more than anything. Therefore you will succeed no doubt. Good luck.