I want to wait about sex with my new boyfriend. He's mad because I have had sex before. How can I explain?
152287
For one thing you were with the other guy longer so it's not like you didn't make him wait a while too... but the thing is, you have to make him understand that regardless of how he feels about it, it's YOUR body, and it's worth more than tumbling into bed as though the sex doesn't matter and your body doesn't matter...you are more important thatn that, and you are worth more than that... you are MORE than just a body for someone to "have" or "own"... If he loves you and I mean YOU not what you can give him, then he'll suck-it-up and wait for you...and if he wont...then he isn't worth your time OR YOUR BODY, not to mention your heart and soul which as a woman I know can very deeply be a part of it all... if he isn't willing to wait it out, someone else who is good enough for you will be willing to wait, and then when it does lead to making love ( which I beleive should be the honeymoon night, but I also dont judge others for their choices as it's not my place) ...when it does go there though, it will be for the right reasons at the right time for you, and the man who waits for that and respects you like that, deserve that and it will make it all the more beautiful. Jsut remember above all... you're worth it.
550987
Just talking to him and tell him how you feel , tell him you don't want to lose what you have! Maybe he fills the same way but don't know how to tell you! You need to talk to him communication is a good thing. If you two have know each other for that long and have already had sex and off and on for 6 years then I bet he does have feelings too! Sound s like you two are a match!
414193
If your boyfriend is used to having sex with you, and you stop giving him sex, he will probably leave.  Maybe you should try asking him out on dates since he isn't doing it, or just breakup since you don't seem very happy.  Maybe the 3rd time will be the charm.  (It took me 5 tries to find the right one)
1147491
Not sure where the diploma falls into things *scratches head* Is that new catch phrase?  Do you mean diaphram?  Some kind of birth control?  Anyway...\n\nStart by telling him you're a virgin.  Then tell him how much he means to you, how he makes you feel, and what's so special about him.  Tell him that you have so much trust and respect for him that you want to share this experience with him.  If he feels ready to move into that phase of your relationship, then he should reciprocate.\n\nBut... if you're too shy to broach the subject so gently, just blurt out, "Hey!  Wanna bump uglies?"\n\nHave fun, safe sex.
353699
I think that if he truly does like you for you he will appreciate that you are not ready.  Now, something similar happened to me, and i was pissed, (i will be honest, I was rather horny, and expecting some gratification that never came.)  If he does get pissed just let him know that it is not him, it is you.  If you do not want him to enter you, is there anything else you might be willing to do that will satisfy him?  If not, let him know.  But in the end, you have to do what feels right.  If deep down you really want to have sex, but you are getting cold feet or butterflies, i suggest you go for it.
544469
sometimes you can't help the way you feel.. I would be rather annoyed with a guy if he tried to have sex with me on the first date, but if you really want this person emotionally, then you are emotionally stimulated to want to have sex with them because it feels soooo right, there is passion from both sides.....
869097
If you truly couldn't wait, you would have gone out and done it :)\nIn your heart of hearts, you obviously want to wait until there is someone special in your life, and that is a good thing!\nCelebrate the fact that when you make love, it will be that - making love.  And not some cheap one night of sex which would leave you feeling worse.\nI know it must be very frustrating, but I think you are craving having someone special to spend time with more than you are craving 'sex'.\nThere are many people, male and female, who make the desicion to wait until they meet someone special until they have sex.  I didn't wait, and I do regret it.  Meaningless sex leaves alot of people unfulfilled - it left me feeling worse than I felt before.  This might happen to you too - often you can feel worthless and you self confidence drops after a one night stand.\nDo you really want your first time to be with 'just some random girl'?  Would it not be more special to wait until you find someone you truly care for who cares for you?\nI hope its not coming across like I'm telling you that you have to wait - if you really want to just have sex then you can do that - I just want to let you know that some of who did that wish we had waited.\nI don't know if you would actually be able to change how you feel - you are 24 so you are a grown man who knows his own mind, and it is likely that deep down you know you would be happier waiting.  I hope you don't feel presuriesed in to having sex - I've known a lot of people who has presuriesed mates 'jokingly' only for it to come out later that they themselves hadn't had sex and weren't comfortable with that fact, and were just trying to shift attention.  Mates have a way of making us feel small for taking the sensible route sometimes.\nYou made a positive descion to wait, and I think it would be best for you to stick to that descision.\nIf you've yet to meet anyone special - get out and meet more people.  Make new friends - the more people you know, the more chance you have of meeting someone who you click with.\nGood luck, I hope you can make the right descision for YOU!\n\nEditted to add:\nThe only way you can 'control' yourself is to think things through and look deep inside yourself so you know what is the right descision to make.  Only you can decide wether or not to wait, so if you find yourself feeling like you might be tempted to just go out and get laid, take a step back for a couple of minutes, and ask yourself if that is what you really want.  Listen to your heart and your mind, and remember that purely physical urges will pass, but the negative feelings you may have if you have an unfulfuilling sexual encouter can last a lot longer.\nHope this helps.
798237
Why are you embarrassed about it?  Is there something to be ashamed about?  So what if you had sexual relations...it's when he starts lying about the details of that sexual relationship then you have a problem.  But women can be pretty good at nipping men in the butt if they chose to reveal details.  Let him know that if he wants to remain civil friends that he should grow up, or else you might just have to let all of your female friends within the common circle of friends know just how pathetic a lover he really is.  He knows that you are bothered by your past sexual relationship and is trying to tease you.  He wants a reaction from you.  Just don't give him one.
913760
well he is ready. sounds liek what my bf and i were liek not too long ago. (weve been sating for 2 years) always talked abotu having sex. i told him how i wasnt comfortable wih the idea yet and wasnt sure (we were both virgins) so i just told him that. he didnt bother me abotu to as much as he used to before. i knew he respected my decision. i eneded up waiting over 1 and a half years intot he realthionship till i felt liek i was comfortable wiht it and everything. you shoudl just tell him that you dont know if your ready yet and if he relaly loves you he will respect your decision and stick it out till you feel more ready. there are better ways to please a guy that just sex. you can always make him dinner or something =) good luck. just dont rush into things if you dont feel ready. i dont konw how old you are. but advise waiting till you are in a serious relationship to loose it or have sex.
593639
I did it when I was 15, but I was with the guy for 4 years. I do wish that I had waited longer, but I wasn't pushed into it.\n\nDon't let people push you into things that you don't really want to do. If he keeps bothering you about it, then you need to tell someone. Like a counsellor or something. You don't have to tell them that you have already had sex. Just say this guy keeps pressuring me to have sex with him, I don't want to and he won't leave me alone about it. I know its easier said than done, but you should tell someone you trust who is older than you.
97644
I am 24, and a virgin.  I told my bf early on in the relationship.  I think the longer you wait to tell him, the harder it will be.  If you are waiting to have sex, it's definitly important to tell him.  He will know not to pressure you.  If you just haven't had sex yet and are willing, tell him that too.  Either way, it is best to just tell him.  It can be scary, but if he's a great guy, he won't care.
449879
That's fine, lots of couples wait until they are married to have sex even though they have had sex with each other before.  It just makes the honeymoon better because both of you will be extremely horny, so you will enjoy it more.  He's a good guy; just wait.  I promise you, it will be worth it!
1073914
If you feel things were going too fast, they were.  Be careful putting yourself in these situations, though.  If you go to a guy's house when his parents aren't home, he expects to get laid, especially if you start fooling around with him.  If you unwisely put yourself in this situation again before you're ready, tell him no first if you didn't this time.  Oh, & don't give him a sexual moaning no, as this won't get his attention.  Give him a blunt, firm, commanding no.  If you lash out violently right off the bat, he may reciprocate.  This is another reason it's wise not to go somewhere alone with him until you are ready for this possibility.  He could have felt like you led him on, & were being a tease, & then gotten enraged when you slapped him.  You're lucky, because this could have resulted in an asault or a date rape.  From now on, I hope you'll be wiser in your decisions, as this could have ended up being potentially dangerous.
354629
You obviously haven't had good sex. Just because your boyfriend likes it, doesn't mean he's any good at it.\n\nWithhold sex until he learns how to please you better and then you will enjoy it more.\nAnd make sure that you're into it before you proceed - if you're not turned on or aroused, it will not bring you pleasure. There is surely something ot be said for foreplay.
305027
Well just tell him, explain it the way you did here. Since you two are already intimate, no guarantee that he will wait around the three months. In the future wait longer before you become intimate with someone, instead of changing your mind after wards, and cutting them off. That is going to send some pretty mixed signals. Hope it works out for you, if he does stick around he's a keeper ;)
776371
If you're asking about having sex for the first time, it's not now.  You shouldn't have to ask.  If you have any doubts, you're not ready.  Don't let him tell you otherwise- trust me.  I listened to my bf, and I was depressed for four years.  Take care of yourself.  He can take care of himself if you say "no".
1107158
Its good that you have waited, sex between two people that really care about each other is amazing. \n\nBe carefull, make him wear protection, choose a time when your not going to get disturbed, your both relaxed and you feel ready, for any female, it is usual to hurt at first, make him take it steady.\n\nYou will always remember you first time, make it special, take precautions and have fun