how do you know if you're over it or just in denial?
154125
You're not over it or in denial because you are just trying to get on with your life rather than trying to get him back.  It doesn't mean you didn't love him because you are trying to go on with your life; it just mean that your mind has made up its mind to do what it needs to do to start living again.  It will take time but in the meantime; I think your body and mind is trying to survive through all that has been going on.
154320
truthfully your ex's never get over you entirely. in any relationship with a true connection there will always be something that reminds you of why you were together. even in bad breakups and relationships you never really get over it you just find something or someone else that lets it fade away but i know when im reminded by someone of when we were "together" my mind rambles on about them for a while.  you just can tell when they have gotten over you enough to feel comfortable around you without wanting or wandering why everything is the way it is now. hopefully you will remain friends. then you cant say you lost anything.
342826
Well if you can't see it then you are in denial,when you have been in a commited relationship with someone you really want to make it work out,its not easy to come to terms with the reality things are not working out but deep down you always know.The best thing to do is pray about it and take your time before making any lasting decisions.
696729
Hate to say this but you are putting you through the emotional rollercoaster.  It's possible to stop.  Think about being open and honest with these two about your feelings, doubts, and fears.  You'll feel better.  And remember, the world won't end if this connection you feel goes away.  You'll still be worthwhile and valuable as a person.
1054265
If you have one there will be no doubt in your mind! If you think that you are having one but you aren't sure, chances are that you aren't. It will be a feeling like you've never had, so you will know. Read the links below for more info!
841209
He may be thinking just like you, worried about saying it and not hearing it back. Why not just end the doubt by saying what you feel? Odds are you'll find out you're both feeling the same way. If not, better to know now.
842224
well it is hard to admit that we are divorced, it's like saying I failed in  a relationship. But until you get over that feeling that it just wasn't meant to be, you won't feel good about yourself. You have to realize that it wasn't your fault and eveerything happens in life for a reason if we don't always know the reason
1186164
i think it's easier to know when someone is not in love with you! when you love someone you can't help but show it but when you fall out of love it stands out a mile.\n\ndoes she flinch when you touch her, doesn't want to be intimate, conversations end more quickly, she seems to be a lot more busy than usual, she avoids you, you hardly do things together anymore, or you can see it in her eyes, she doesn't look at you the same way anymore?\n\nthere are a lot of things but if you just have 'that feeling' sorry to say, but you are probably right. if thats the case, you have to let her go. don't try to fool yourself that it can all be good again. that never works!
380576
When a relationship ends their are stages a person can go through, just like it would be as if someone died, and you were grieving. Only the stages are less intense. It sounds like you are bouncing from denial to acceptance. You need to find things to do to occupy yourself... What did you do for fun before this relationship? Well, I would say as long as it was healthy, go for it.
910702
You have every right to ask him how he really felt.  Go ahead, ask.  Make sure you tell him you aren't interested in getting back together, but that you just want to know how he really felt.  If you feel like it was all fake though, I'd trust your instincts.  Can you trust him not to lie to you about how he feels now that it's over?
488046
I have mixed feelings about this one. I fell out of love with my husband years ago. I stayed because he was all I knew and we have 2 kids. My mistake was that i didn't confront him when i began to notice I didn't love him any more. Instead, i  told myself it'll get better. But it got worse.\n\nIn my experience, once it's gone, it's gone. I am now divorced and am OK with it. You are right about there is something in a woman's eyes. My husband said the same thing to me.\n\nI'm sorry I couldn't give you something more positive to stand on.
395907
I think the people who say get over it are after their 2 points and don't really care about how people are feeling. It shows their immaturity.\n\nYou're right. You can't just get over it. You can't just move on. You have to deal with the pain that the person you loved and trusted violated that trust in the worst possible way, by being with someone else. It is heartbreaking to see that you are in such pain. There is no easy way to get through it. It's going to take a lot of time and maybe some counseling.  \n\nYou also might consider praying for healing. Beliefnet.com has some prayers that, over time, may help you to heal. Here is one:\n\nPrayer for Healing   \n\nLord Jesus Christ, by your patience in suffering you hallowed earthly pain and gave us the example of obedience to your Father's will: Be near me in my time of weakness and pain; sustain me by your grace, that my strength and courage may not fail; heal me according to your will; and help me always to believe that what happens to me here is of little account if you hold me in eternal life, my Lord and my God. Amen. ~~ Source: Book of Common Prayer 1979\n\nI pray that eventually you will be able to put the pain of lost love and betrayal behind you. God Bless!
1048848
only time will tell  \ntake a deep breath and take it slooooow
360448
Depends on the person.  Some people can brush of feelings like turning off a lightswitch.  Other people can't.  Work through your emotions but make sure you get out and meet new people and move on with your life.  Don't get hung up on what might have been.  It's nice to think It would have been nice if... but thinking too much, dwelling on it too much only consumes yourself with doubt and fears that you will never find something like it again.
799617
everyone i think in one point in our lives has felt the same pain. it'll pass. nothin here on earth is permanent, even hurt. \nThink about this.. God sees you in your pain and He knows excatly when to relieve it. One thing's for sure, that happened for a reason. After that, you'll emerge one strong person.\n\nI read that there are stages one has to go through when confronted with pain. First is the denial stage. we refuse to accept the truth and create all sorts of wrong reasons and justification why it happened. Then after that, comes the bargaining phase. in your case, say u bargain to her, wooing her and promising everythin just to win her back - all to no avail. others who are not mature enough often takes too long before they could pass these stages. Often, they intend to stay in misery and refuses to let go. Last stage is acceptance. That's when you finally realised and understood the genuine reason why it happened. You now resolve to go on with your life.\n\nTake it easy man. you'll pass through... i know
347037
I was in the same position about 2 1/2 years ago. My boyfriend of 3 years was a CONSTANT liar. It finally got so bad I had to just let him go. Wow am I glad I did! I have grown so much, and feel so much better. It was almost like I forgot how happy I could be. It was really hard at first, but worth it.\n\nYou just have to get the strength!
893200
honey if u say ur over someone u should truly be over them.  if u didnt wanna truly end it u should have just confronted him about ur probs and maybe u could have worked it out.