what to do in love married man living together 4yrs he had a baby with wife child 18 mon old says he loves me?
154625
first stop buying things for a child who you owe nothing to and second did he have the baby while the two of you were together because if that is true then he might think he loves you but does he respect you
161999
This is something you should speak to your husband about. My wife had a similar problem. She married me at 18 and I was her first. She expressed her desire to be with another man for the experience, and assured me that in no way was she interested in leaving me for another. Since I love her with all my heart, I wanted to do anything possible for her. Through our discussions we have decided that we will pursue that in the future if the situation arises. I am working through some issues over it, but as I said, I love her and will do anything for her. If she needs to fulfill this, then I will allow it to happen. We may bring another guy into the mix with us or it might happen with her and him alone, we haven't decided that yet, but we will discuss everything and both of us must be comfortable with the situation in order to proceed. Communication is the key. I'm quite sure that your husband has some fantasies of his own that he hasn't shared with you yet. This could possibly be an opportunity for you both to discover new things in your relationship. Have a conversation with your husband. If your husband loves you as much as I love my wife then he will at least ponder the thought. Good luck.
200797
First of all does he love your kids?  Think about your kids first and not you.  I mean that is a bit harsh but don't you want a great father for your kids and for you?  And then, think if he can help you in the long run?  Is he going to be there when you need someone the most, is he willing to take the challenge to be with you or not? And about the 4 kids thing talk to him about it.  Tell him that you do not want to have more or if one day you both get married then you both can have one.  But a relationship is based on many factors too just not love.  There has to be a strong communication between you both and understanding.  If you feel that this guy can be that special someone then risk it.  You can never expect too much from someone else.  Think about yourself and your kids first.  Good luck.
542123
it sounds like it..just talk to him about whats going on...ur married and i hope everything works out..congrats on the new baby
550225
I was in love at a young age too and my guy turned out to be gay. We're still friends, but it is just an example of how much can change. I'm now married to a great man I would have never met had I stayed with a guy while I was your age. Keep you options open, but stay with him as long as you are happy. Just don't make any perm. decisions till you are older. You both still have a lot of changing to do. Tell him you love him too, but you don't want to promise a life together just yet. Not because you want to be with someone else, or someone better, but because you both could change and you don't want to make mistakes.
133103
How does he feel? That is perhaps the most important question here. Since you are pregnant, your baby coming from a broken home is going to be determined by your relationship with this boy. If he is agreeable to it, why not make a commitment to raise your child together by getting married? Normally 18 is a bit young to be getting married because people change a lot from 18 to their mid-twenties and since for most of us that is the age that we get our first taste of freedom, this could spell disaster when we realize that our husband/wife has a right to be involved in our life to a great extent. This can feel like a lack of freedom. Also, having a baby can make people feel trapped, especially males. It will be hard but if you two are in love and he's a good guy, know that statistically you would be doing the best thing for your baby if you were married. \nTry to give to your partner instead of only giving as much as your partner does. Tell him about that resolve. Giving can be very contagous but so can being hurtful. A loving word can stop anger dead in its tracks in a marriage. It takes two to fight but only takes one to defuse a bomb. Try to make your first instinct to defuse the situation. Take care of all 3 of you, and I hope our e-opinions help you.
382974
Age is just a number, and this decision should be yours and yours to make.  Try discussing how you feel with your partner and hear what his response is, if the both of you are happy, then I say enjoy it.  Life is way to short and there are many people in this world who aren't happy with there spouses and significant partners, so I say go for it.  I was with someone who was 18 years my senior and didn't care, we were both very happy but religious differences got in the way and we decided to part ways, so if you are in love and being loved, I say work it out.  Your friends either accept it or you can find other friends who are more tolerant and less judgmental.  Good luck.
32882
I would say try to make it work if you can, it sounds that he is good for your kid.\nDId you loved eachother at apoint?\nIf there is no other way just talk to him
513911
i don't know if u married him or not but i think u must find one suitable for u , i am single and i Love my life i am not die if i am not have a woman but i don't go love and  married woman older than me by 18 years i think i will be her son yes he can gave u many thing but after little time u will know the fact u need to be with one can understand u u say u not in love with him anymore then what u feel now just emotion because i think u r single and alone if u need anther help contact with me have a nice time and good luck
262146
Hey, me n my wife r 8 years apart. It is no biggie. If you are younger than 18 , then yes its a problem. If you are, then i suggest you wait. If not, then go with your heart and enjoy someone who loves you.
211675
I can relate to your question. Last week my wife of over 20 years told me that she was not in love with me anymore. She said she loves me but is not in love with me. I have spent some time in the local library doing some reading regarding relationships. I would recommend the same to you. What I have found is several things. 1st is communication you have to talk. 2nd look back at some of the things that made you a happy couple in the past and try and find out what has changed. 3rd if there are things about you that your husband is trying to change to make him love you than he doesn't... My issues are simple. my wife wants me to be something I am not. I am not her auto mechanic. I am not her errand boy and I am not her handy man. I told her that projects are fine if we do them as a team. but don't expect me to always mow the lawn, paint the house clean the garage clean the attic etc... We are a couple and couples do things together. maybe it's time to look at your relationship like your roomates? take equal responsibilities for what you have. Become an equal to him. If he is the bread winner then better yourself. Find a job that makes you more the equal. take on more responsibility. If the car breaks take it to the shop and get it fixed. Go out with him more often, take time to date again. Find things that you both have in common and do them. Find new things that you can do together...Relationships are an ever changing part of life so keep on living. if it alls fails then get out. Don't be miserable for the rest of your lives. Maybe read the book "falling out of love" read it from cover to cover. It's a short book follow the examples and see what happens.
83226
Not necessarily.  You just need to be careful, because marriage is a big thing.  I am assuming from your nick that you are a girl so..... Marriage at any age is a big thing and not to be taken lightly.  I have to agree with the other person that answered and said as long as you feel that it won't be an obstacle for you later then, no you are not too young.\n\nWhy don't you ask yourselves these questions and then maybe you can come to the answer to your question:\n\nApart from being in love with this man and feeling all the tingles and so on, do you see yourself living with this person for the rest of your life?\n\nImportant: Do you two have the same religous beliefs, morals standards , etc...to build a solid foundation and therefore later on stability for your children? \n\nWould you die for this man?  ( I know this question is a bit harsh, but you know what, my bestfriend asked me that when I was deciding whether to get married...it really sheds a light on things).\n\nMarriage isn't all tingles...babies come along, diapers, bills, arguments, etc....if you two can go through all that, then that's really LOVE.\n\nHope I didn't confuse you.
109344
It (probably) means that it wasn't meant to be. You two have lived it up and have produced two lovely children. I'm sure the both of you love them more than life itself. But perhaps that's where it ends...It seems like you have tried everything. Hell, you even went to counseling. Good job on both of your parts. You two want it to work. Maybe you're going through a phase? Maybe you should spice things up a bit. Join a club together, join together in a new sport, go hiking, camping, maybe you could spend less time with each other. Mabe ALL you need is a BREAK. C'mon now...16 years together. THAT tells you something. It cannot just stop like that. Do not give up. There is a reason why the two of you are together. There is a reason why you met, why you got married, why you decided to create children. Reminisce together about the days when you were younger, the crazy things you guys did for each other, the first time you told each other 'I Love you', etc. Do not give up. If it's an attraction/physical thing, work it out (Literally). Get sexy, make him look at you like you're the hottest thing to have walked this earth. It's not over sweetie. I believe in you guys.
344436
wait until you are married. i know it sounds square but it saves u from a lot of pain. I wish i did. At least then u know that he is 100% commited to u and not using u. This might seem to hard but trust me life gets a lot harder if u dont. Do u want an std, a baby(i had one at 20 and when ur on ur own it doesnt matter how old u r its hard), a bad reputation or a broken heart? Hope u make the right choice sweetie. God Bless
480523
hi Jennifer, i think this man loves u but he has a problem with u so whenever u get closer to him he feels like doing something to u. just find the right time and talk things over. but please do it in a respectful manner. and also about the divorce do not think about that yet cos you have children with this man so if u go ahead with it, it will affect your children. but if things gets out of hand u better live before he harms u.
99083
You have a heart don't you? you will know. Secondly do you two get on good together is he understanding etc. And finally is he good with kids. You don't need to worry that he won't love you because of the extra You just have much more to give.
1012401
well, i agree with you totally.... you should not get married just because you have a child with someone..... a child doesn't make you love another person.... the relationship will only become worst in time... do what's best for you first.... i feel like to be a mother and a wife you should always love yourself first.... take the time out to see if marriage is what you both want.... maybe he already wanted to marry you but now he feels like it's more of a reason.... good luck and congratulations on the baby....