How do you let your boy or girlfriend kids know that your not trying to take the place of there father or moth
155887
you need to tell his kids constatly that you dont want to take their moms place and you love him (their dad) very much and wouldnt hurt them by taking away anyone and that their mom will always be their only mom no matter what happens/ed.
926303
There's no easy way.  You just have to be straight and to the point.  There are no magic words that will make it easier on either of you.  Just make sure the kid are with grandparents or a trusted friend for the night so that they do not have to hear anything that is said.
1029837
I suggest being straightforward with the people and tell them right off that they cannot use those words around youre children. whether theyre youre friends or not(i dont know) you should still tell them immediately to stop
55142
Just be honest with them.  Don't beat around the bush and try to stall.  Just tell them out right.  He/she might be caught off guard or shocked, but you will feel so much better in the long run.
403091
You should be honest up front. Then take it slow. Later on when you feel comfortable you could introduce them to your kids.
566807
Try dat lines, even dat it worked for me:\n\nI feel like cursing u 4 all d sleepless nights dat u have given me. u'll have a son who'll go mad behind my daughter, just like d way i am mad for u,.... \nBut then.....\nWhy trouble those innocent ones...\nCome lets make them brother and sister...:-)
304979
As a parent, I will give you great advice as I have been there.  Stay out of it!  If you interfere, you will push them closer together because your son will want to prove that he is right in his choice and you are wrong.  If you stay out of it (as I did), he will come to realize that she isn't right for him.  He might be starting to realize it now since he is depressed and pouty...he just hasn't reached the point of ending it yet.  He might be like my son...the way he ended it was to deliberately defy her "rules".  This pushed her into ending it.  He didn't want to break it off and hurt her feelings so he did everything he knew she hated!  \n\nI know it is hard to keep your mouth shut when you know your son isn't matched with the right person but it is the right thing to do...at least until and if he asks for your advice.
567237
I have the same problem. Tell them that you don't want to and give them reasons. Be firm and don't let them control you..........after all, being single is awesome!
787612
I would think any child that is not you sons would be hard to accept. If they are back together tell him how you feel and have him talk to her. If he wont talk to her then you tell her and tell her that you will not be a part of this child's life if she doesn't stop acting this way. If they are not together then you don't need to accept the child and it doesn't need to be in your life. Sorry to say it that way but it is true. Also I think once you see that beautiful baby it wont matter anymore. GOOD LUCK.
706068
i should not say this but this the only way. say your child that he is not your son . then see his mood . he will be cryying. then also dont care about . say to him that if he will say to his friend or any one about it you will leave him in lulu center and come . then after 4 days see his mood he will be in upset that day night you say him that he is your own son . then he will slepp happily .then say him that never be naughty and listen to  her .ok
812569
They have been raised with NO pride so it would be useless for you to intervene plus you would be classified as a "nosy" and backwards aunt.\n\nYou have no clout and their mother doesn't care so, yes, relax and let it go.  If it bothers you, then don't go where they go.\n\nYou are right about the young boys.  They turn on easily.\n\nGood luck.  Pops
982448
Hi. Look this is a no win situation for you. I know as I've been there.The best thing to do is ask your man to join you no matter what the situation is. Your kids have to get use to the idea that your have a life and you are entitled to be able to get on with it just as they do. They don't ask your permission as to who they date and don't expect you to be in a mood because of it. My partner and i nearly ended up apart when we tried to please everyone. You have to think of you and your boyfriend as he will be there for you when you need him and they wont as they have there own life to get on with AS you have. Good Luck and Merry Christmas and a happy new year
493122
It's quite simple and it's not really a spell. I do this whenever I want my son to come home from out playing early, like if I decide I want to go to the store or something, or whenever I want my boyfriend to call (or not call as the case may be)or any other friend for that matter, I have a friend who does it to me all the time too. It works really well.\n\nTake a deep breath, relax your whole self- this is the most important thing. \nNow picture yourself going to the place where that person is and telling them that they should call you, or come home now, or whatever. Say it very firmly, but gently. It's not an order, just a suggestion.\nThen bring yourself back to you are, and picture yourself talking on the phone with that person, or the person walking in the door, or going to the place you want to meet them or whatever.\nThen forget about it. \n\nIt doesn't always happen when you want it to, sometimes it takes awhile as it's all up to the whim and the convenience of the person. They won't call you if they don't want to talk to you. My son usually responds right away, but if he's really having fun it might take awhile. When my friend wants me to call him, sometimes he has to wait awhile before I get around to it. Usually I'm thinking, "Oh I need to give him a call" for a few days but I don't do it till it's convenient and sometimes he says, "I needed you on Friday, but I'm okay now". My boyfriend on the other hand, we respond to each other pretty quickly. If you know the person very well you and you do this regularly it becomes a very simple matter of pausing, breathing, closing your eyes, thinking "Call me please" really hard and going on with your day.
562059
Be firm with them. Set clear boundaries and let them know that you do not wish those boundaries to be crossed.\n\nIf they cross those boundaries, then remove yourself from their presence. Terminate relationship with them if needed.\n\nCordially,\nJohn
334247
Let them see what he does for you.  Set down physical boundaries when you're around your parents i.e., no touching except hand-holding,no kissing, groping, making out, pinching, sneaking off, etc. let them see what a gentleman he is. In turn, show them you REALLY love him, and nothing will stand in the way of that.  But since you do want their blessing R-E-S-P-E-C-T.  You respect them (even if they say quit seeing him, respect their wishes, they'll see you're sad, if it came to that.  Just remember you can't hope for them to like him. He has to be a good guy, and work at it.  It may also just take time.
550005
You know who the responsible parent is....YOU! Just continue being what you are, and the problem is solved. Kids are smart, and they KNOW! They want to live where there is stability, security, and love! You give them all that, so you have nothing to be concerned about! Relax!!
24639
CALMLY talk to your parents. LISTEN to what their concerns are. I am a son, parent, and soon to be grand parent ... Although I rarely took my parents' advice and changed my life because of it, when I did LISTEN, it made my life easier. My parents realize (and I realize as a parent) that kids will NOT do what they want them to do, but if the parents are HEARD, it makes life easier for you, your parents, and the "mate" you are talking about. Think about what they are saying to you, DON'T ARGUE or MAKE THEM THINK like you think - that ain't happening - You allready know your opinion, now PLEASE take 10 minutes and hear the opinion of your parents.