How do I talk to my teenage son when he beleives his mother is cheating on me, when she is not?
144825
Teenagers aren't dumb.  They know how the game is played.  I wouldn't completely discount what he's saying.
157499
THE THING`S MY SON DOE`S NOT KNOW ABOUT  HIS MOTHER BY MY DAD
230483
Tell your friend to go straight to the police, can she talk to her mother if so i know it is a hard thing to tell someone but mum needs to know
1130937
ok, hang on for a second. think to yourself,"Why am i doing this? Is it because i am concerned? Or am i nosey?" Is your daughter's boyfriend reliable? Because if he is then if the situation is not broken, dont try to fix it.
865229
You just told it. Tell it to your son that way. It's better when it come from the way you remember it. \nI'm wondering how old your son is that you still have such a tight relationship. Just don't smother him, or one day it will be too much for him. \nLove but let live, too.
835072
I can see your confusion and your concern but the only thing you can do is wait it out and be there for her. You cannot control your mother any more than you can control the weather. She may be so eager to find love again and get involved with a man that at the first chance she jumps all over it and becomes obsessed. You are awesome for being such a caring son but your mom has to see it on her own. If she is this far gone in love with this guy then she won't see things your way no matter what you say and if you say anything to her she may even get angry with you. Good Luck and I hope this helps!!
87704
Hi! If you want to do the good thing, tell your mother. Tell her all the FACTS, don't tell her that you believe him because you love him, that you think that he will change, or that kind of stuff. Just keep straight to the facts. If she asks you for your opinion, go for it, tell her what you think.\n\nIf you go to her in a fact/positive/non BLINDED way, she might respect your opinion, at last, you'll have more chance of getting your point of view of the situation. It will also be helpfull to tell your mother how you are dealing or going to deal with the situation. Also, share with her the letters. She'll see that you are honoring her, respecting her, and that you are looking for a wise answer for this situation. Good luck.
1121156
You need to just ask him honestly why he doesn't want you to get to know his mom.  Maybe he knows something that you don't - maybe she's really mean or something - who knows.  You'll never know the truth unless you just come out and ask him.
647972
It is time to let go. Four years has given you your answer. She'll never change even if she claims she will. She sounds paranoid to me in fact, endangering her young son. You're trying to do the right thing but it is time to realise that the right thing to do now is to divorce her, get custody of your son, move on and find another woman worthy of your trust, respect and love. Don't stick around and let her scar you even more for that's just too convenient for her to do. It is not something you want your young son to think - that his dad cannot stand up for what he thinks is right and let a woman (even if it is his mom) put him down over and over again & cheat on him. I am sorry if what I said have offended you. I know you are doing this out of love but she does not deserve it and your son deserves a better mom. She lost her right to be his mother when she did what she did. Sorry. And Good Luck to You!
704345
I've had the same problem with my mother and the result wasn't a good one, her relationships with her boyfriends put a wedge in our relationship. I learned to deal with it, but I don't want that outcome for you. You have to talk to her about, sometimes that doesn't always work, but at least u can say u tried. The truth is men can brainwash a woman and turn them against there children, its sad but it happens. Try to stay strong with this situation.
624622
If a boyfriend, get rid of him. If your son, don't even try same if a brother. Who knows, somewhere along the way, you may find that the idiot is not him but you. Who knows?
135102
Are you still at school?  Can you hang out at lunch?  Do your homework together?  Ask your Mum about her concerns.  Don't get upset with her, just listen and respond calmy.  Maybe you could have a small gathering of friends at your house, including the boy, (with your mum's permission of course) and then your Mum could get to know him in a non-confrontational setting.
523923
None of that would help.  Stop being a jackass and love your son for who he is.  And be grateful that he got his personality from his mom's side of the family.\n\nIf it makes you feel better, I'm sure your son will one day have more luck with the ladies than you ever have, you pig.
923543
Wow, Paul. Creepy. I agree that that these recent events may seem 'cosmic' in nature, but some of these things may seem suddenly more related because you have her on your mind. Constantly.  Kind of like when you learn a new word or phrase, and then it seems like you hear that word or phrase constantly right after that. Know what I mean?\n\nI think you've become obsessed with her, and you're not really thinking this through.\n\nFirst of all, have you discussed this with your son?  How does he feel about getting to know his mother after all these years? If you contact this woman, that may become a reality, and your son may have a different idea about that.\n\nHow would your wife react to this?  \n\nMost importantly, what purpose would it serve?  I think you have this fairy-tale idea that you'll become pals again and all will suddenly be well.  In reality, you'll be dredging up years of resentment, anger, and disappointment, especially where your son is concerned.  \n\nIs it really worth it?\n\nI can tell you that the reality of the results of such an endeavor will rarely live up to your hopes.\n\nDon't look at all these recent events as a MESSAGE.  That's an EXCUSE.  You want us to encourage you to do this thing.\n\nI'm not gonna do it.\n\nGood Luck,\n\nPolly
207026
Honestly explain to him first that you feel like you're not trusted with the child and let him know how that makes you feel. If you two are in agreement then you can approach the mother in a non-threatening way and let her know that you'd like to be more involved. you are a step-parent here and should be.
80569
Wow I can't believe that first answer. If you guys used to have a close relationship with him, and now you don't, that is awful and heartbreaking. Obviously she doesn't want you to talk to him because you have an obvious right to really dislike her, if not worse. I would definitely try to talk to your son, and when you can, explain to him how much it hurts and that you can't understand why he is treating you like this for her. Hopefully he is just in a happy phase, will wake up and realize how dumb he is, and will then return? And dump her? I'd try that first... just don't call him 10 times a day... that can be awful...
785027
Tell your son that he has to be careful about the people he talks to and becomes friends with. Let him know that you don't think this particular female is the kind of person he should become friends with and you're only telling him this because you love him very much and don't want him to be hurt. Also, he needs to tell this girl to please stop sending him messages.\n\nUnfortunately I have a feeling this girl just wants somebody she can tease and embarrass. She is definitely not a classy lady.