what should i do when im in a realationship and its violent sometimes an we argue alot but we love eachother?
155498
Your safety is the most important thing. Alot of times the violence becomes more severe as time goes by. It's better to be alone than to be abused.If you really love this person you both could seek good counseling. Until then stay away from this person.Go to family, friends,Minister, anyone that you trust.Love is sometimes blind. No person male or female should ever put their hands on anyone out of anger.You have to love yourself more. Again your safety is the most important thing. Good luck to you.
469783
You should be ashamed of yourself to begin with. Love is about "giving" to another, not "taking". Love takes no offenses. "Love" endures hardships. You know what you should do! Get your emotions and hormones under control, bite the bullet, and have a marriage like nobody else has anymore in this country. Try that. If he is violent towards you, get away, get divorced and leave it alone. Otherwise, go be a wife and reconcile your family... your home... your life you chose.
292941
It's either the trust issue or something deeper. Do you bury or repress fights when you are together? How do you fight when  you are apart?\n\nI've heard alot of terms for this, passionate, full of emotion, whatever. In the end if two people can't get along, it's best to part ways.
114200
If love is true, then I would suggest counseling and possibly anger management classes or something.  You certainly don't want that to happen again and lose control for either of your sakes!  Good luck!!
433308
It's not about IF you fight, it's about HOW you fight. \n\nThere are always going to be dissagreements, you are two different people and you have seperate thoughts. The time of your life right before a wedding can be very stressful, but there are many stressful events in life, you don't want to be duking it out all the time.  But what is most important is the way you fight.\n\nIf you disagree, and both get a little heated holding your own and then make up and let it go.... you are probably fine.  You might want to figure out why you're fighting, if it's communication issues, stuborneness, or temper.  But all of those can learn to be overcome or controlled.\n\nBUT.... if your fighting reduces to name calling, tantrums, wall punching, or hitting then there is a respect issue.  ANd that becomes a problem.  Fights like that are usually the beginning of the end. The issues there go far beyond spats, and will become the walls between you on the way to divorce.\n\nThis is also a good time to evaluate her issues.  Is she starting the fights?  Is it becuase she's not getting her way?  Or is it both your faults?  Is this how she handles stress?  Does she blame you for everything?\n\nMake sure that your sweethearts character is all you thought it would be.  Peoples true self comes out when they are under stress.   \n\nTry and evaluate why you are fighting. If you two are like most couples it's probably working out the communication issues, and every new couple has them.  If you are both mature adults they will work themselves out in time. And you'l be great.  But if there is more to it than that now.... the pressures of marriage, and day to to day life may prove to be more than you bargained for.\n\nGood Luck!  Let us know what happens.
219910
Are we talking about Mental Aggressive or physical pain ?\nThe old saying goes it takes two to tango, when you two stop dancing the floors together and get your acts together in the same frame of mind , try talking things out in a simple tone of voice, without other people adding their two cents into your conversation. most problems can be avoided by communication, and understanding why each of you feel the way you do. The abusive behavior has to stop as well as the physical part too. you must of had a good reason for still loving this man , perhaps your looking at this matter allot more different than people writing to you see it behind a brick wall. because your there and we're not. If at first you don't succeed with communication then leave him and give it a few days for him to be alone then he'll come to his senses and wonder why you left him, then you can talk in a simple tone of voice about what the problem is between you two and work things out from there.. Good luck !
628288
You're describing what essentially are problems all people cope with simply because two people can never always be on the same emotional level all the time. There will always be times in any relationship when two people will be experiencing completely different moods and emotions and it's at these times when our relationships are truly tested for compatibility, sincerity and mutual respect. It's also each persons responsibility to that relationship to acknowledge the other for their patience, love and understanding during those times of test. If we can do this together then those times when we're not on the same 'playing field' of moods and emotions then the relationship will survive and ultimately grow stronger. \nHowever, if your relationship is experiencing an increased frequency of these varying moods and arguing is becoming more prevalent between you then my opinion would be that this could simply be because in reality, you're not compatible enough in personalities, beliefs and common goals to be in this relationship to start with.\n\nI wish you the best!!
533101
Just be honest and tell him how you feel. Be alone with him and tell him that you really love him and don't want to loose him. Ask him to forgive you and to try to leave it all behind and start over but this time instead of fighting, you guys need to learn to communicate and take things slowly. Don't jump into conclusions because that just makes arguments. Remember communication and trust are the key things to a communication. Trust in him and be honest about how you feel. It will be okay. All couples go through this don't' take it to harsh.
570564
It doesn't matter if you like each other or not.. you FIGHT!!  Let it go, Honey, and move on.  Life is WAY too short to spend it trying to be with someone you only have fights with..  trust me on this one.. been there, done that.. and it sucks.
143586
You need to talk to this person and discuss the issues that are making you cry.  If you love each other it is possible things can be worked out.  If not then you will have to end this relationship because I can't imagine spending all your time crying when you should be happy instead.
258934
Love is to precious not to fight for if you 2 are truly in love then find a way to be together and work on your families little by little Good Luck and Be Happy
1115855
fight like fist fight? NO! Is it normal to disagree with one another, YES. Afterall you are two different people with different ways of thinking and then all of a sudden you are married to that person and living your daily life together. You better bet there will be arguments. If you never disagree you or your partner is a people pleaser type personality or you just figure its better not to ruffle any feathers and try to bury all your feelings, which in the end will blow up in your faces. If you are having a disagreement over a certain thing all the time, maybe it's better to seek counseling over the issue before there is too much resentment and the problem gets bigger. It's normal to laugh with your spouse as much as it is normal to have disagreements, it's life. How you handle them will definately determine whether or not you are married for long though. Best wishes!
1044301
Well you could try explaining to them how it makes you feel and how it affects you. You may need to speak with them separately and when they are calm, Tell them how it makes you feel and that it hurts to hear them fighting and arguing as you love them both. It may help calm the disagreements, but it probably will not eliminate them.
440371
Hi try walking away when the fighting starts and cooling down, when you both have a minute 2 cool down try and talk about it this has worked for me and I think it can help you
148500
You need couples counselling. Crossing the boundry into physical violence during a fight is an extremely serious problem - one that won't go away by itself.
293689
Try getting some couple's counseling.  Staying together or breaking up is a decision that you need to make for yourself, but there are things you can take into consideration.  \nFirst, what is he saying?  If he is just yelling for the sake of getting his anger out, that's probably okay.  But, if he is insulting you or threatening you, that's not okay.  That's verbal abuse and it can be really hard on you in the long run.\nSecondly, do you feel threatened?  You can trust your instincts here.  If you are scared of him, get out.  If you aren't really all that scared when he yells, things will probably be okay with counseling or just talking to him about it.\nAnd finally, does he have a history of violent behavior?  If he is more violent, say, with brothers or friends, or if he condones violence he is more apt to become violent with you in the future, even if he has never touched you before.  Physical abuse can come about so gradually that you may not even realize that's what's happening to you.
329202
First, you need to understand why you're fighting. Is it over another person, money, time spent together? What?\nAfter you figure that out, plan a romantic evening. We're talking candles, music, pretty lacey things if you're at that stage, that kinda thing. And then apologize. Tell him how much you love him and that you're sorry that things have been so hard and that you wanna start over. And then do. If he feels the same way, he'll accept your apology and he might even apologize himself. \nGood luck sweetie