My Ex would threaten me If i would cry.?
138784
Oh my husband had similar problems in his childhood. His mom would beat him everyday even though he did all the household chores. Yet she can't face it if someone cries or even hints that he might be in pain. Even today. \n\nSo my husband has all these bottled up feelings which finally found a vent after marriage. In these 3 years of our marriage, he has suffered from many panic attacks and he has other psychological problems too.\n\nSince you feel incapable of crying, vent your feelings out to a friend. My husband never had a close companion because she would not let him have any... and lack of a confidante is not advisable. Share it with someone... anyone. \n\nIf you want to contact me, I can give you my mail ID. Either I will edit this post and add it or when you choose a best answer, I'll mention it in the comments. \n\nMay God Bless You.
768687
Just make the break and refuse his calls.  If necessary get a judge to give you a restraining order against him.  He sounds like he could harm you.  As far as him killing himself or whatever, that's his problem.  You have to protect you and can't worry about what he's going to do.  I'm sure you still care about him but you have to do what's best for you.  He probably has no intentions of harming himself but he knows that it bothers you and that's why he says those things.
500699
Yeah...it sounds familiar ...I have an ex who tried the same...basically you have to set boundaries as it's not appropriate for him to visit you given his feelings and the fact that you're committed to another man. Tell him to use the phone or mail to communicate but don't expect him to go away -it's been 18 years since my ex has been doing this but as he's basically harmless I haven't really cared. The important thing is -is your ex harmless? Or is he someone who may act on his obsession? Finally I want to say -be sure you're not sending mixed signals...I've seen too many women not be clear about their wishes only to whine or press charges later when it's their fault for not being direct in the first place! Be honest with him and tell him to scram! There's my advice...I hope you take it! Edit~ I got your mail....If you hate him as you say AND HE HAS 'HURT YOU SO BAD' then why are you putting up with him then? Get a restraining order! Call the police and file a complaint and ask them to tell him to stay away! I thought maybe you still liked him on some level but since that's not the case you need to be pro active! Don't sit here on yahoo talking about it-do something about it -and I mean right now-today! Make sure you don't regret not doing anything!!!!!!!!! Everyday you let this go on-you encourage him more, and give him hope and he will become more relentless! You have been warned!
81639
that's a very bad situation. only advice i can give you is based on the experience i had last year. my situation started out like yours and ended with me stayin in a crack neighbor hood and my boyfriend tryin to kill himself cause of the ex. i think it's a bad situation and you need to take whatever steps you can to get her to stop. legal or illegal. if this situation is f*ckin with your head then you NEED to get out of it. don't put up with S*it like that, you don't deserve it. there are other ppl out there
344921
make sure your not sending mixed messages - tell your ex VERY FIRMLY that if he tries to touch you again you are getting a restraining order and consider getting one
560212
This ex girl of yours needs to get a life and take responsability for her actions. SHe's just trying to make you feel guilty.  Stay away from her, avoid her... otherwise she's just going to take you down w/ her. You don't need that. You are who you are.
956246
Remember, people are ALWAYS communicating with you, even if it is non-verbal.  Right now he's saying that the pain of confrontation and admitting his bad behavior is more painful than trying to repair your relationship.  You have offered to try to repair it through your attempts to contact him.  Now it's time to let it go.  Big talker, right?  I didn't say it was going to be easy, or pain-free, it just has to be done for your own sake.  And believe me, you don't want to feel like you don't give a damn, that would be denying your feelings, your trust in your relationship, and your broken heart.  I'm going to tell you to do something that is going to sound dorky, but I really want you to try it (what do you have to lose?)  Write him a letter.  Say everything you want to say about how you feel, how hurt you are, how angry you are, call him names.  End the letter by saying goodbye and saying how much you will miss the relationship you had.  You will never send this letter.  After you've written it, read it once, then rip it up and throw it away.  I promise you this will help.  You will still hurt, but please do this and you will feel better.  You need closure, and since he's not giving it to you, give it to yourself.  Let me know how it goes.
177020
Why would u stay with someone that beats u? For 3 years? Get out and get a restraining order, it will be hard but in the long run it will make you stronger and you will be much happier and safe.
205726
Well, I am concerned that you would hurt yourself because you mention it. So please, if you ever do feel that wayseek medical attention. From what you have said, I think your issues are caused by your ex. I think that you should break off with him and his family for good. He and his family like to play mental games. You will find someone else that will treat you will respect. These people do not respect you, they are into drama. \n\nI know I am not a guy, but I know that what I have read is totally wrong. You can get out of this situation, just walk away.
1129418
HE will not change with you. Cut the strings, you have wasted enough precious time that you will never get back. He is feeding you a line about being afraid...get going and get on with your life. Good grief, I cannot believe you hung around this long!
4892
This may be a little late, but you should notify your local police department about the threat and the person who is threatening you. If possible, stay out of your environment in case they strike you or harm you and your children in some way. If you know this persno, find a way to recieve a restraining order from court. And, if possible as well, settle your dispute with the person and see a solution for your disagreements. I hope that all will be well in your life and I will be praying for you, whether or not you believe in the same God that I do. I wish you peace.
100867
Ouch. Kudos to you on doing what you said you would, but for her it might be too little, too late. She needs to know that you will do what you say even when she isnt threatening you. Is there anything else about you that you know bugs her? Make an effort to change that too. She feels like you dont care enough about her to change, but you are doing the best you can now.\nLevel with her, tell her that you didnt change before but that now that you know how life is without her that you want to be just the man she needs.
83383
I've been there, done that. If you don't want your heart ripped out, don't do it. He probably thinks you'll jump everytime he comes around. If he gets mad because you won't do it, just remember, he'll get over it. My ex is a very stubborn man, but when I told him I have too much self respect to do this anymore, he was extremely mad. After a while, he got over it!! Good luck!
602356
try being afraid to walk out of your house to your car because you are afraid of your ex killing you; push a chair against the door at night because you are afraid he will break in; be almost ran off the road by him because he was following you to a police station; looking out your window one night and seeing his truck parked across the street, him running around in neighbors yard, you call the cops, they catch him and you find out he had a homemade bomb in his truck.\nScary enough for ya?
1115298
You don't. My ex has hurt me so bad so many times, and every time I talk to him it takes everything I have not to beg him to come back.
978872
sorry, but this all sounds extremely immature and blown out of proportion.  and hate is a very strong word and emotion.  \nwhat happened with your ex-girlfriend is between you and her!  it has nothing to do with the present girlfriend, but you've obviously dragged her into it anyway!  not smart at all!\nthe best way to deal with your ex is to totally ignore her.  she'll leave you alone when she see's she's not getting to you anymore.  she's just trying to get a reaction from you.  so don't give it to her.  and wanting your girlfriend to beat up your ex?  think about it, it doesn't get much more immature than this.  think for a minute, you're causing trouble and blowing things way out of proportion.  and there's always the chance that your girlfriend isn't as tough as you think she is!  what are you going to tell her if your ex beats her up?  will your girlfriend then beat you up because she got beat up?  see what I mean, nonsense!
411167
Take the high way out.  Look him in the eye and tell him exactly how you feel.  Because, if he really knows you then he knows you are playing games or acting out in anger.  My ex told me to my face and it bothered me.  Years later, it made me a better man.