My 12 year old has ADHD & she is gifted.  Help w/ discipline. chores, listening & loss of appetite from med?
138472
Routine is essential. That is, simple, consistent routines. \n\nThey should be very specific, including (for example) when to take of shoes after school and exactly where to put them. That way shoes never get lost in the morning. When to eat, and how much.\n\nAny chore obligations should be written out, timetabled and strictly adhered to.\n\nSimple strategies for helping kids with ADHD:\n- Make sure your child is looking at you before you talk\n- Give short, clear instructions – one or two steps at a time\n- Use visual support for instructions, like a whiteboard or checklist\n- Have consistent daily routines\n- Establish some simple rules for behaviour at home\n- As much as possible, minimise situations that make your\nchild unnecessarily stressed\n- Praise your child for good behaviours and try to ignore minor irritations\n\nPlease email me for further information: tim0huxley@yahoo.com.sg\nand I will send you the details of some excellent contacts.
479822
ADHD is a medical condition. Medication controls the SYMPTOMS of this disorder but it doesn't cure it. Some kids, like the one in my class with ADHD right now, actually do worse on the meds and have to be taken off. Then there are side effects. For other kids, medication has helped tremendously and worked well. The kind, dosage, and timing of the medication must be experimented and adjusted.\n\nWhatever you decide to do, medication SHOULD NOT be the only, or indeed the primary, means of intervention. You say he is not focused or organized. It is imperative that you find someone to help you teach your son skills and stratgies to help him cope with these challenges. You have the right as a parent to request special services for your son. That is, to ask under special education law or the American with Disabilities Act to have accomadations made for your son in the classroom.\n\nWhat kind of doctor diagnosed and prescribed medication? Hopefully you have the resources to take your son to a doctor who specializes in ADHD and related conditions. Other conditions mimic ADHD but do not respond to medication because they aren't the same medical disorder.\n\nYou may also desire to have your son tested for food allergens or sensitvities and monitor him for sleep disturbances. Also, increase the amount of physcial activity that he gets each day and limit the amount of computer games, video games, and television programs to less than 30 minutes a day. None of these things actually causes ADHD but in my opinion they may worsen the effects. \n\n\nTo sum up: it is not always necessary nor desirable to treat ADHD with medication though sometimes it is very useful. But medication should ALWAYS be paired with other interventions and therapy to work with the child.\n\nGood luck!
314244
If cutting caffiene (e.g. sodas, teas) IMPROVES behavior, the child DOES NOT have ADHD. Someone with ADHD will visibly calm down when given caffiene.\n\nAbout 5% of kids who are hyperactive are really having a food allergy.\n\nhttp://www.nutramed.com/Foodallergy/fachildren.htm\nhttp://www.nutramed.com/children/hyperactivity.htm\nhttp://www.healingwell.com/library/allergies/kaemmerer6.asp\n\nSensory Integration issues also contribute to hyperactive behavior:\nhttp://www.sensoryint.com/\n\nADHD is a MEDICAL condition...in spite of all the debate. And, I can tell you from personal experience that without the right doctor, his treatment can be messed up very quickly.  Your parent(s) need to ask around...find parents of kids with ADHD, and ask them about whether they are happy with their child's current medical treatment for it. Remember that they will run into people who have been burned so badly by inept doctors that they won't medicate their child, no matter what (instead, their kids are in constant trouble at school, not academically achieving like they could be, and may not have many friends). We went through five different pediatricians until we finally found someone who was really able to help our son.\n\nIf the doctor feels that your brother may benefit from medication, your parents may have to go through trials of different medicines and dosages before they find something that works for him. Always keep in mind that medication is a tool...if something is making him sick from side effects, or he's groggy all the time, or it's just not working, they need to go back to the doctor and insist that dosages and/or medication types be changed. If you're lucky, the first medication prescribed will work wonders. \n\nOr your parents and the doctor together may decide not to start trying medication until he's older...the doctor will have management and parenting tips for them.\n\nIf the doctor diagnoses ADHD, they need to take a written letter (not a prescription) from the doctor to your school district's special education office (YES, even at age 3 or 4, you can get specialized services free through your school system). This will get them started on getting him specialized help, including a school social worker who can help them find good community resources, therapies, and specialized preschool programs that have teachers who are highly trained in helping your brother start to build good school skills early.\n\nHere are some additional links to help:\n\nhttp://www.netdoctor.co.uk/diseases/facts/adhd.htm\nhttp://www.genetics.ucla.edu/labs/nelson/adhd.htm\nhttp://www.chadd.org/\nhttp://www.adhd.com/family/index.jsp
1153161
I would have him evaluated by a pediatric specialty team at your nearest children's hospital or rehab center. My daughter was dx'd with ADD/ADHD/PDD-NOS and then High-functioning Autism by her ped and later by state funded physical and occupational therapists through early intervention. She was medicated at the school's insistence for ADHD. When that made things worse instead of better, we had her evaluated at our local pediatric rehabilitation center and learned that she was actually a perfect match for the symptoms/actions of Aspergers Syndrome and early onset bi-polar disorder. The reason the meds made things worse was that with bi-polar, you can't give just the anti-depressant, you have to do a mood stabilizer as well, or the manic symptoms will intensify and often times go out of control. Hope you find the help you need to help your child
1152058
get them to create something. Drawings, building blocks, games that excite or test their ability to remember, painting, crafts. You can try making them discuss issues. You will be surprised what comes out. If you are facing hyperactive children know that their attention span is very short so a variety of quick games may help. TV is your last resort. They would likely not enjoy the same program anyway. Good luck.
784272
i have adhd and it would have made my life alot easier if i would have been diagnosed sooner i barely passed 1st through 5 grade so i was constantly in trouble with my parents as soon as i got on the meds i started passing \nim not saying its a miracle cure but it does help \ndont make your kid have to be in special ed if she doesnt have to be its hard to get out of it
920986
1. 13\n2. Female\n3. I can't really remember I was 8 when I was Diagnosed, but I was looking back on some papers the other day and I was being eveluwated and I was given a Connors behavrile cheack lest and a I.Q. test and some other things that I can not remember.\n4. No because my dad doed not belive in the meds. although me mom is taking Ritlen.  Given the chance I dont thing I would take the meds. but I would try all of the other treatments that are aviable.  My faimly ignors the fact that a have a proublem, even though my grades a horrible.\n5. No...well Im in jr. high\n6. Yes sometimes I feel like a out cast and I feel unloved, but I have maney great friends that help me.\n7. I think I learn fast but I have trouble organizing it into my brain and writhing stuff out on paper.  I also get confussed eaisly and the my brain is just like a t.v. that is always flipping through the channles...all the time.\n8. Not really...sometimes I do play rough and stuff but I have never caused and serios acedents or any thing.\n\nIm sorry for any spelling/grammer mastacks that I tryped...
51612
First and foremost, relax. Proper relaxation ritual, is very important. Also she should probably cut down on stimulants such as caffiene, and keep a healthy level of activity. Long walks and the like.
485278
Everything you are saying on this post confirms what I was suspecting when I answered your other post. Get her to a pediatric psychiatrist now, and insist that the school provide her with appropriate programming. I'm sure her regular ed teacher is a good one, but regular ed teachers do NOT have the training to deal with this sort of situation. Once you have the diagnoses from the pediatric psychiatrist, demand the school hold an IEP intake for your daughter.\n\nThey should NOT categorize her as E/BD. She should be categorized as Gifted, and if you get her a diagnosis of Anxiety and/or OCD from the pediatric psychiatrist, the school psychologist can recommend that the diagnosis be categorized as Other Health Impaired rather than E/BD. She should be receiving support from the school's gifted ed specialist (someone actually trained in gifted education...demand credentials), the school counselor, and the special education psychologist.\n\nIf you are in a state where gifted education is not a part of special education, still demand the IEP, but also demand gifted education modifications (compressed/accelerated curriculum, reduction of boredom and increasing of motivation through replacement of skill drill work with individual projects focusing on higher-order thinking skills, etc.), and a statement on the service page of coordination of her OHI program with the gifted education program.
215533
ADD/ADHD is VERY real. It is an imbalance in function between different parts of the brain. Stimulants (caffiene, medications, etc.) bring the "slower" areas into closer functioning with the "faster" areas, allowing the brain sections to communicate better and reducing distractibility, fidgeting, confusion, etc. \n\nThere are many good educational programs for children to learn to deal with their symptoms. "How Does Your Engine Run" is a good one (check with Occupational Therapists). \n\nMedication is a decision to make with your physician. Because it is not always clear how each medicine affects different areas of the brain, and because each and every person with ADHD has different combinations of active/inactive areas of the brain, often several medications must be tried, at different doses, before symptoms are relieved. Some people do not benefit from currently available medications. Do NOT stay with a medicine if it is not relieving symptoms, or if the side effects are not acceptable. Medication is a tool, not a requirement. \n\nShop for a good school in your area, with good teachers who understand and know how to work with people living with ADHD. Insist that the school OT evaluate your child for Sensory Integration Dysfunction, and that your child be placed on either a 504 plan or recieve an IEP (your child qualifies for this help under "other health impaired" through the Individuals with Disabilities Act/IDEA) to ensure teachers are giving the classroom and instructional modifications that will best help your child learn.\n\nGood luck.
740872
my son was promoted to the second grade barely knowing his alphabet and numbers. i also decided not to medicated during second grade. towards the end of the school year it would break my heart to hear my son say that he was stupid because he didn't know what his classmates did. i finally put him on ritalin. OMG!! what a change. he went from getting 20's and 30's (even with 501 modifications) to getting 70's and 80's. he has been taking the meds ever since. he is now a sophomore in hs taking regular classes and thinking of going to college. i highly recommend medicating IF the need is there. you need to take your child to a child psychologist who specializes in add/adhd. they cannot prescribe meds but can recommend. best of luck and tell your daughter to hang in there.
501391
any 12 year old should be helping with chores but even moreso in your case. im sorry for the difficulties you and your wife are going through.\n\nas for your daughter you might just have to do something shocking... if she isnt going to help out then maybe she will find out her fave clothes arent washed and ready for school, supper isnt waiting on the table for her, etc. i learned fast how to do laundry when my mom shrunk my FAVE lace blouse,,, i  freaked out but she said she has 4 people's laundry to do and doesnt have time to check every single tag on everything so if i want it done right, its time to start doing my own,,, so i did. i wasnt happy about it but i got over it. \n\nlots of kids are brats at this age but your child is walking all over you and im sorry to say that perhaps youve been letting her for far too long but its never too late to get things going. good luck!
724681
My daughter was on Adderall for years.  When she was in 1st grade she was found to be ADHD. When we got her on the correct medicine and dosage, she went to flunking to straight a's.  \n\nWhen she visited her dads house he would say the same thing.  He thought i was doing it to make it easier on me.  I offered for him to talk to her doctor and read her assessment.  He refused but just kept accusing me of giving her the meds because i was lazy.  Well, now she is 15 and the hyperactivity is gone.  We are now just dealing the the attention deficite part and he can finally see that what i did, was for her own good.  \n\nMaybe you just need to ask to talk to the doctor that diagnosed the boy.  Ask to see the diagnostic tests that were used and the results.  Also the schools do an evaluation if they are aware of a problem with the child.  The parents should get a copy of that.  I would ask for any documentation that is available and then work with the other parent to adjust the dosage or meds so that they work with the boy to help him get good grades in school.
722251
Therapy and Medications. Admit her into a phyc ward for a while. And I agree with the chanting of, "Jesus save my daughter". That's pretty funny. \n\nIf I were that kids mom, I'd give her ONLY what she NEEDS! Clothes to last a week. A blanket, pillow, and mattress. 1 towel,tooth and hairbrush, and she has to "check out" toiletries such as toilet paper, shampoo, conditioner, and soap. NO toys, posters. movies, games, t.v., phone. This is called "Tough Love", and is used often by many parents for kids who refuse to understand the concept of having respect for their authoritive figures/parents. My folks used it on me for 2 years. They even locked me up for that time period. I was better for it when I got out to be honest. It REALLY does work. I gained a way better concept of appreciation for what I received for free. I am 31 now, and I think I live a better life now than what I might have, had I not gotten that intervention.
652225
I FEEL SO BAD! Where's the time for you? I didn't see anything for you at all. I didn't see any counseling for yourself. My fiancee has ADHD also and I know how that part of what you're going through. We're not married yet, but it's taken quite a bit to get his mom to finally accept our relationship but, your mothers treatment is UNACCEPTABLE! You ever watch the Nanny on tv? She says a childs behavior is UNACCEPTABLE quite a bit. She's not a child (which would be more Acceptable) she should be showing you more respect. You can only do what you can handle. You're first priority is to yourself and your immediate family. Meaning you, your children and your spouse. Your husband needs to stand up to the plate. (as my fiancee finally did) He needs to back you when it comes to his mother. His first priority is with you and your children. He also needs to be helping you with the children and around the house as much as possible. Even though he doesn't work, you two need to have a night out once-in-awhile by yourselves. Maybe, you can talk to your mother-in-law about a limit of times to help her and she in return watches the children for you night out. By this I mean EQUAL TIME. As far as the bills, reality isn't that your mother-in-law is going to pay the bills. First off, I don't see if you're living with your mother-in-law but, if you are that's going to be a majority of the problem. Which getting your own place would be greatly advised. There are places that can help with deposits and financial resources. In all, it makes me believe you are living with your mother-in-law and that's going to be a very hard and stressful situation. My advise is to move. Your husband may be ADHD (so is my fiancee) but, he still needs to know he is to be responsible. Write down what he needs to do and try to involve the children in all the chores. Watch "The Nanny." Or go online if you can't get that show in. She helps not only the children but, the relationship with the parents towards how to keep everything together. You're not a work horse and no one should treat you according. Good Luck!
343522
Be careful with the meds. There are non-drug alternatives for ADD/ADHD treatment. One I have heard great things about is biofeedback, sometimes referred to as neurofeedback. Try a Google or Yahoo search on the those 2 words.
985448
Some of the responses on here are nothing but a blatant display of ignorance.\n\nI am dealing with an 11 year old with similar issues and we are having a VERY hard time. It's been this way since he was very small. Early intervention is a good thing.\n\nOne thing I found very helpful when my son was about 8 was the book 1-2-3 Magic. It's a deceptively simple discipline plan and it really worked for a while for us. Not so much these days though. It's definitely worth checking out of the library. I did that and then went and bought myself a copy.