we are having an affair and our significant others are incarcerated. do we tell. we would like to continue to?
147902
Get a divorce. It isn't fair for your spouse to expect your marriage to stay intact when they're in jail. Do you really want to be married to an ex-con? You don't neccesarily need to tell that you are having a fair but I would file for divorce while they are in jail and can't get pissed and come over and fight with you. He really can't do anything from jail. Congrats on finding new love and wasting away waiting for your lover to get out of jail. Move on with your life and be happy that you found new love.
654803
When you are married and are having sex with someone else. Otherwise it is all just wishful thinking. \n\nDepends what you want....a fling or another relationship. If it is a fling enjoy it for want it is but don't expect it to last forever. Do you want to get caught? If so, it is better to tell your spouse and not get caught in the act. Believe it or not, infidelity also has ethics. Use a condon always. No calling home at night. Make your lies believeable. Do not let the 2nd relationship interfere with the 1st one. You have to give equal sex or as much to satisfy each one. And lastly, ask yourself why this happened- maybe it is time to end the marriage.\n\nIf you are the third in the triangle. Don't expect much, most people do not leave their spouse. Enjoy it for what it is and be discreet and generous. Realize that you are also to blame since you should not be involved with a married person so this says A LOT about your morals also. Also, ask yourself if you in turn will be capable of being faithful in a monogamous relationship. \n\nIf you are being cheated on. You can either get out or try to work it out with your spouse if they are willing to do so. Can you live wondering when it is going to happen again if ever? Do you want to try it? The door has being opened so you could. And finally,.....how did you contribute to this? Did you see it coming? Honestly. Did you enable it?\n\nUnfortunately nobody is innocent in this situation. It's more like a 33.33% assigned blame for everyone.
720004
i've been wanting to tell my husband that i am having an affair & i want him to help me to get out of it before it's too late but i can't tell him that 'coz it would really hurt him so much & i don't want to loose him & so i am trying my very best to get out of this mess...  = (
43078
Well it depends on if you are...repentant about the mistake you made.  if you are, yes. you should. he'll find out someday and it's better to come from you with a real face of repentance than for him to find out and ruin your relationship because of it. \nIf you aren't repentant and you could care less if your b/f knew, then tell him and break up with him.  'cause if you 'cheated' on him, whats the point in being HIS     friend?
1126313
Let me get this straight: you're married and you have a girlfriend? Ok. Got it. Well, if you valued marriage, then you wouldn't have violated it by having an affair. However, it's too late for that and now you're asking for your girlfriend to say 'I love you'? First of all, there's no point in getting her to say it if she doesn't love you. Second of all, get a divorce and then maybe she'll come to love you and be comfortable with saying it. Personally, I don't think you deserve to be with either woman. Your girlfriend is just as guilty as you are though because she knew you were married and yet still carried on. But that's just me.
562186
I agree with RKRELL and in addition according to what you state in your question with regards to "Due to the fact that her lover told me he was arrested for possession of cocaine that he was going to give her for her birthday last month", I would say you definitely want to make your attorney aware of this. This being true it would seem to me this 'lover' could provide both testimony as to her personal habits of both drug use and adultery which in most states would at the very least afford you possible temporary custody of your sons.
19915
There is a wonderful support and information group at http://prisontalk.com\nAmong the members are many people in the same situation you're facing.\nI've got a "someone special" locked up, too, and this group has helped me a great deal.
103315
it's easy, just tell him/her u're no longer involved. The sooner he/she gets to know, the better.Or else u will be fooling urself thinking he/she still loves u
511920
U don't do anything, just keep loving the person. He will need your love and support while in prison. A lot times love ones are forgotten about when they go to prison. Never let anyone tell who to love and not to love. Make your own choices.
962604
Good luck!It's not gonna happen,the prison won't tell you if the person is in there.They cannot give out that type of information.They will assume you are trying to help the person break out or are after the person for some type of vendetta.
624038
It sounds like your guilt wants you to tell, but telling will only hurt her and make you feel better.  If it was a one night stand, let it go, otherwise someone's got to break it to her, preferably you.
76578
Move on...\n\n"He told that he had cheated on me"\n"my man give me chlamydia"\n"he's been in and out of jail sense he was 13 years old"\n\nWhy would you stay with him? He's rarely going to be around if he spends half his life in jail.
976386
When it comes to infidelity, it's true, the spouse is typically the last to know.  Most likely, not only did your in-laws know, but a lot of other people probably knew or had their suspicions as well.  No one wants to be the person to tell, so many people both actively and passively try to prevent the truth from coming out.  If I had to guess, I'd assume that your in-laws behavior isn't all that atypical.  So, I'd treat them as I would treat anyone else who had hurt me.  I'd let them know exactly how I feel about what happened.
22639
No. Telling him will only make you feel better and\nmake him feel betrayed. Keep your mouth shut and if\nyou love him, never never never do anything like that again. If you don't love him enough to be true\nleave him and let him find someone who does. Life is\nshort. There is no time to waste with people who do\nnot care about you.
95558
The girls answer is "Yes we would definitly tell" and "Yes we would want you to tell us"  I mean I could dump him then he could be with the person he's tryin to get with behind my back no strings.  Well wouldn't you want to know if your partner was cheating or trying to cheat?
569296
Surly to "speak up" for one of the "guilty" would make you guilty anyway.\nLose on more sleep on this matter.
981744
They need to question the spouse - you should expect that! There is no way for them to know you are not involved until you talk to them. Just be completely honest and everything will be fine. If you really aren't involved and didn't know about it, they'll see that. Don't worry!