How do I get my teenage son to quit smoking?
106601
Wow, I'm sorry to hear that he's smoking.  I started smoking when I was 12 when they still sold to minors thinking we were getting them for our parents.  I also started drinking beer shortly thereafter.  I didn't try pot until after my freshman year in High School.  I never really did any of these things to excess, but many of the people I knew did.  \n\nWhat finally got me to quit was my roommate during my freshman year in college (18 years old).  I had elected to have a smoking roomie because I wanted to be able to smoke in the room.  But she smoked a lot more than me and they were menthol and the whole room reeked and it made me sick.  So for me, it was over-exposure to smoke.  On the other hand, I kept drinking and getting high sometimes.  It took a while before I realized that these were also a waste of time and money.\n\nNow I have a son who's 14.  His dad died of alcohol and drug abuse before he turned 40.  My son has seen first hand the negative effects of drugs and alcohol, and he does group cigarettes in the same classification as alcohol and drugs.  I started talking to him about it at a very young age, and continue to do so.  He now has friends who smoke, drink and get high.  He tries to get them to quit.  \n\nBut sometimes my son says that he believes it's his destiny to follow in his father's footsteps because he's so much like him in other ways.  My response is that the traits he shares with his father are inherited - like his body's build, and his hairy legs and even his voice and facial expressions -- but I tell him that his behavior is his choice and the only thing that he really has control over, so he does NOT have to follow his father's path.\n\nI suggest that you start by considering your son's motivation to smoke.  Does he do it to fit in or look cool?  or is he rebelling against you and trying to piss you off?  If it's the first reason - that he's looking for a group where he feels like he belongs, try to encourage his interests that might keep him too busy to have time to smoke.  My son LOVES basketball, so he has his friends there and they don't smoke because it could hurt their game (although some of them drink and/or get high occasionally), so for the most part, he's accepted in that group.  It may take an investment of time and money on your part - but he's your son!  I recall when my son tried-out for an AAU traveling team a year ago.  One of his oldest friends tried-out too, and he played quite well.  This was one of the kids that my son was trying to get to quit smoking and partying (he would hang out and drive around with 18 year-olds and he was only 14).  His mom wouldn't let him join the team, because it would cost around $400.00 over the course of the season.  My son was really upset that this woman would choose to allow her son to smoke and get in cars with 18 year-olds, as opposed to spending a few hundred dollars to help him get involved in a healthy activity!  She wouldn't have had to drive that often, because we were right in the same neighborhood - I'd have provided transportation.  But anyway, I digress...  (sorry)\n\nIf your son's motivation comes from rebelling against you, it will probably be harder for you to address.  Pretty much anything you say will be tuned out, and he may want to defy you even more.  His rebellion stems from a dynamic that's been developing over several years, so it won't go away overnight.  \n\nStart by being honest:  I love you and it hurts me to see you smoking and doing harm to yourself.  Then try to explore the motivation and possible acceptable alternatives from there.  Don't talk down to him, and don't make demands.  This is one situation where it will help to start treating him like he's his own person.  You and I know he's got a long way to go, but remember how sure you were of things at that age and what fools you thought your parents were?  So addres
195040
Just say no!  I know that is a cliche, but it is good advice.  Tell your friend that you don't need to smoke to prove yourself, that you are more mature than that.  And, look at all the adults around you who wish they could stop smoking and wish they had never taken that first smoke.
368842
Tell him that.  I have to warn you though that no matter what you say you will most likely not be able to get him to quit smoking.  It is a very hard habit to break and I think the tobbacco companies are making cigarrettes even more addictive than they need be.  Until he decides that he wants to quit and seeks help to do that, there is very little that you can do.\n\nYou might tell him that an internet friend of yours is now forever broken hearted and alone because her husband would not even make a serious effort to quit smoking.  He died 4 months ago of lung cancer.  Tell your father in law that it was an ugly, painful, lingering and finally humiliating disease and a horrible way to die. it is a terrible thing to put your loved ones through and they will suffer forever when the smoking finally kills him..... and make no mistake, it will kill him. \n\n For his sake and his family's sake tell him, I personally beg him to try and stop befor it is too late.  My husband had no symptoms and he was already 4 stage when he was diagnosed  they gave him 5 years to live. He did chemo and radiation and everthing and still he died in 9 months.  Your father in law might have less time than he thinks
162066
Only three things are going to work:\n1. Eliminate alcohol and tobacco. Ain't gonna happen.\n2. Constant monitoring of teenagers. Very expensive.\n3. Explain the consequences of smoking and drinking to them, without lying. This will not have a 100 percent effectiveness rate, because many teenagers feel they are old enough to make these decisions without the info.
1112
I myself am trying to quit, as of the day after Christmas. You'd think seeing my mom die from lung cancer when I was 29 years old would have been motivation enough. It is sooo hard, especially around your "triggers". For me, it's at home after work. My dad told me when he quit he would go for a walk or take a drink of water. I have tried them as well. I have not had luck with the patch nor the gum. I am trying cold turkey again. I have a straw I "inhale" at home .. just a straw. It seems to be working. Then I think about how gross it is and why I don't want to do it anymore. There's a great commercial out there that shows a dr saying he doesn't think he can operate and then a smoker saying I dont' think I can quit.\nI think the clincher for me is that my best friends kids are 13 and 14 and are both smoking. I was a little bit younger than that so I am trying to be a good example to them. I have to quit. \nI wish you success in the new year to quit smoking.
113775
you are married so i think you musrt be mature enough. there is only one true answer to  this. he doesent want to argue with you.he says he stoped smoking,but he is not strong enough to do it yet.but still,he doesent want to hurt you or he doesent feel goog to admit he is too week and cannot stop so easy. but if you are not repressing him with that,and if you support him and show him you love him no matter if he smoke or not, it will be different. so,show some empathy here.its not easy to stop smoking for some people. you'll see ,he may be stronger when see you wont make a big deal from it
1098525
well, it really sucks to go through this for you.\n\nRemember that your parents are human and that they love you.  The amount of stress they are going through is tremendous and it will take some time to adapt for them and you.  \n\nMy teenaged daughter has done very well with the whole thing, but we made sure she knows that we love her.  \n\nThe smoking thing is very tough, it's a habbit that your mom uses for stress relief, she probably didn't even know she did it till it was too late.  don't nag her about it cuz she don't need to be nagged, but just tell her that you don't want her to die from it and give her some time.\n\nkeep in mind that it all gets better with time!
725893
Aside from being supportive, you can't help him.  He has to help himself.\n\nNow that I've said that, why not give him goals that will make achieving freedom from smoking more fun?  Give him something, aside from health, to work toward.\n\nFor example, after the first week, treat him to dinner.  After the second week, take him out to a movie, his choice.  After the third... etc.\n\nThese types of goals really helped me w hen I was trying to quit.
573867
January 1, 1987 I had my last cigarette at 1am, after smoking a pack-a-day for over 20 years. Try the following. It will work. You don't even need good luck.\nLocal hospitals offer week-long programs to make you quit smoking. Then you'll need this trick to not go back to it: Just don't have that ONE CIGARETTE!\nPeople buckle under the intense urge for a cigarette and think that their problem will go away with one cigarette. But that just makes the problem go away temporarily, only to come back with a higher intensity.\nQuitting smoking feels like a loss of a loved one because to the brain it is just that - a loved one. So be prepared for the longing and the pain. Just endure it. It won't kill you. Actually, it will make you live longer.\nAdapt a new lifestyle i.e. eat fruits, go jogging, etc. Do whatever, but once you have gone through the week-long quit-smoking program, DON'T HAVE THAT ONE CIGARETTE NO MATTER WHAT. If you have that one cigarette, you fail and if you don't then you succeed. It is that simple. You do need that week-long program to launch yourself into the wonderful world of non-smoking though. \nOne more thing: you may need to keep the company of non-smokers for a while i.e. at least one year.
309205
Just tell them what can happen if they don't stop smoking. Do they have little children in the house? It could also cause problems for the children down the road. But if the person don't want to quit then you have done your job. Where do you practice? I am looking for a new Dr. Gl on getting that person to listen.
1164453
You will not make the descision for him or her.  As a ex-smoker, it was not my wife who made me want to stop - even though she tried for 20years - I made the choice.  Give it time, and when they do give up don't talk about it, just let them get on with it.
603523
i am young.... 21. but i have lived so much more than most my age. when i was 11 i started to smoke cigarettes and weed. i was skipping school, fighting teachers, sent to alternative schools (for bad/stupid kids), and in anger management... by the time i was 15, i was losing my virginity to a 20 yr. old. and by 16, i was done. all grown up. now at 15, i wasnt as bad or mean, but still rebelious... and i can not blame my parents, just like you shouldn't blame yourself. others on here may try to tell you that its you, your a bad parent, or all that other bullshit, and all i can say to that is you can take as grain a salt... \n\nWhy was i acting the way i did?... well, my mom had cancer and was wasting away, i had just moved in with her from my fathers who was an alcoholic, and we switched schools, and my mother was switching relationships... that part my parents had a little something to do with, but they were not bad parents, its all just part of life. I was the one who chose not to visit my dad much, and to live with my mom. my mom would always ask the general questions of who, what, where, when and how... but i still would do as i pleased... taking the phones/computers away would kill that alot of times though (hint). as far as smoking... i had an older brother who did and got them that way... or through kids at school. i thought it was cool, even though i had all the speeches... the best way to prevent kids from it is for them to see first hand what it can do... how annoying it is... (like take $5 from them everyday and see how they like it...they can relate to that)... and the weed... well thats something from my brother too... other kids will tell you its cool, fun, and no one will know... well, go online, look up a few underage placements... call them, ask them for brochures... give those to your son... let him see first hand that these places exist for a reason, that kids to get caught, addicted or not, and they will get sent away... even across the state from home... like my own brother had to unfortunately experiance at the age of only 14. and it was over nothing great... just a little bit of weed. and again at the age of 15 for 9 months, for having resin in a bowl that he got busted with at school. and it wasnt his. as for doing things that are bad or mean such as fighting, and swearing, and skipping school... well, that all stops in time, when they realize that school will effect their life. i screwed up so bad for so long, that by the time i was in 11th grade, i couldnt graduate with out having another 2 years tacked on... and i was a straight A student then... so i had to drop out. it took about a year for me to complete my GED training (had to re learn all my math) and then when i took the test, i was off the charts and cried tears of joy  when my diploma came in the mail. counseling never helped me though... i felt that if i was put in counseling, then i was just not understood... and that pissed me off even more. afterwards, i was always worse. you need to let your son know that you are not just a parent... that you are someone they can tell ANYTHING too, and not get  in trouble, but be there for them, and understand them, and give them advise to help... or just discuss it with out them having to worry. it helps if you share a few stories of your own childhood, tell them  a few things that did bad when you were young... get on their level. and laugh at it. and then talk to them as an adult... like they are just as old as you are... do it alone... in the car, or something... even say a swear word or too.. lol.. i know it sounds funny, but trust me!!!! it will let him know that parents are not people who trap them, but just people like them who live life... and have grown up... like they feel they are. just let them know that there is a time and place to act or talk with you like that... (alone). eventually they will gain new respect for you, and learn that they dont need to prove anything.\n\ni know its a rea
1153382
Smoking Cessation Classes.\n\nCheck with area universities for them. Ask your health insurance about where to get them and if you get re-imbursed for them.\n\nMy mother used  hypnotherapy to lose weight once. The Hypnotist offered Smoking Cessation as well. You could try that too.\n\nI know a guy that just made up his mind on Great American Smoke-Out day to quit cold turkey. It worked for him, but you don't have to wait for the day to come around again. (Third Tuesday of November)
1044377
Have you talked to your son to see if it is what he wants to do?  If it is, just let him know that it may be a little harder and he may not the get A's and B's he is use to but he can't get discouraged and quit.
665509
COLD TURKEY.\n just walk away.\n stay away from smokers.\n it works I have been smoke free for over a year. \n ( 4 Packs a day.)\nwhy give the money to someone else.\nput it in your pocket.
322459
Are there any samples of others you can show him that were not good? \nYou know like a long time ago to get kids not to smoke, they would take them to a hospital and show them people on lung support systems. Some had holes in their throats to be able to breathe and they would still want a cigarette because they were addicts.
257027
Appeal to her motherly instincts. I know she very much wants to see you grow up, and to be there for her grandchildren that she'll one day have. \n\nI struggled with smoking for years, and it still comes back to haunt me sometimes... the thing that keeps me from smoking is that fact that I MUST be there for my little boy... he has no one but me. If you can convince her that heart disease/lung cancer will cut her life short (and it probably will if she keeps smoking, especially if she has a family history of it) she may be more likely to listen to you.\n\nSay something like, "Mom, I love you, and I don't want to lose you. What would we do without you?"