Am I foolish to want my ex back after he left me for another woman?
111326
Without more information, it would be difficult for me to say. \n\nIn my own personal experience, I've noticed that the more trauma a relationship survives, the stronger it becomes. As long as the two people are strong enough to forgive eachother and move on. Sometimes minor hang-ups turn into major problems when someone won't let go of their anger.\n\nI'm not the type to encourage people to "dump him, you deserve better" If you found someone who you can love, and loves you, problems are worth working out. \n\nIt sounds like what you need now is to define the boundries of your relationship. What kind of needs does he have? What about your own? What are you both willing to offer eachother?\n\nHas he grown from his mistakes, or is he regrouping to make more mistakes? Get him to start talking, and be prepared to repair the damage or cut your losses and move on.
881408
the slight possibility and the only now and again says something....he may want to get back with her, so just leave him to it...don't mean to sound bad when i say this but i think it's time to just move on...he has stated that he wants to be just mates with you...so respect him for being honest...you'll find someone else, but waiting around for him is a waste of time...he still has it for his ex
112467
You're remarried, aren't you? You should be married to the person you love-- do you really want to separate from the new guy of your dreams?\nIf the circumstances are different, put it this way:\nIf he's saying all that and he's still remarried, forget the guy. The fact that he already has a woman and claims he wants another just proves he has not changed in THAT category... Who knows, maybe he's one of the cheater guys? I know this situation VERY well. My supposed best friend/ex is with someone else right now and I have been trying to get together with a certain guy.\nThe thing is-- this EX of mine, even though he already has a girlfriend, WILL NOT LET ANY HUMAN MALE COME WITHIN THREE FEET OF ME. He acts like he is my over protective father. If he is already with someone but pays attention to you, there's DEFINITELY something wrong with that. My EX hurt my feelings by separating from me FIRST to get with his new girl. Now he wants me back, but he wont even dump his girl.\nThe basic idea is LEAVE THE PAST AS IT IS and move on because I've been through this situation with my EX for the past seven or so years. It's very stressful and it tied me down because I couldn't let him go.
309031
I think he's going to end up cheating on you again.  He continues to lie, and obviously still has feelings for this other woman.  Knowing that you both have been unfaithful makes me think that there are some serious problems in your relationship that you just aren't willing to address or work out.  I know that being with someone for that long can make leaving them all that much harder, but you need to step away from the relationship.  Yes you were both wrong, but that doesn't mean he can't forgive you and stop holding your actions over you head.  Have you forgiven him?  There really is no trust in your relationship anymore and I just don't see a realtionship working out in the long run if the partners can't trust each other.  Hope this helps, good luck!
112072
Ask yourself if why you want her back.  Ask yourself why you left.  Is it because you feel guilty?  Did you desire someone else and now that it is over you want her back?  Examine your love for this person.  If you truly love her then you will be concerned about hurting her again.  Maybe it is best that you don't go back.
789947
its possible he needed time away but i never have ever believed in breaking up then getting back together. if he did sleep with other women then know it was when you were broken up and trust him. if you cant get over it and live happy then its you with the problem.
485764
I should hope you are very secure in your relationship, and if so then his hangin with them is not the issue.  If you have some concern for him hooking back up with her (which would be stupid) then you should let him go.  He was smart enough to leave her, can't imagine that he would find anything she does attractive.  You are the better woman and if he does not know how you feel (since you said you don't want to stop him?) then how can things change? The ball is in your court.  Good Luck!!
1074620
i was in this very situation for the last two month, The man left me for another woman and while he was gone he was calling me the whole time and asking me if he could come home. He just went with the other girl for the sex. We had been in a relationship for nine years and have two children together. He eventually left the other girl and is now back with me and we are married now for the last week. Don't get involved with a man who is on the rebound it wont work. I told the other girl he was still seeing me but she didn't believe me.
1169280
I would say it all depends on the situation. Since you all have so much history and two beautiful daughters, I would think it'd be better to get back together, but that may just be me. Don't do what people on here say, just take the advice and build off of it. Maybe he got scared for some reason and pulled out of the relationship because he didn't know what to do. If you love him and you know he loves you, then I would give it a second chance. If it was meant to be, it will be. I know that's probably the worst advice line I could give you, but I've found out that it is pretty true. No matter what happens, I promise you both will be okay. Good luck and follow your heart.\n~Grace
140743
Wow, your in a pretty bad situation. You should have never taken him back the first time. This guy is someone who likes to play games.I bet he's seeing that other girl again.\nI'm sorry that you're in such a mess but there's not much you can do. Whatever you do DO NOT!!!!take him back again..You can raise that baby on your own..you don't need him..take it from me, i'm 19 and a single mom of a 2 year old little girl and yes its hard but you can do it.If you decide not to have the baby thats your decision but please im begging you do not take him back.believe me he'll come crawling back saying i love you and all that bullshit but dont buy it cuz he'll just break your heart again.good luck .
1012285
Give the man some time.\nhe only needs to trust you. He feels like he could go through hell again to try and feel the best thing in the world. You need to prove to him that you really care and you are not like this other girl. Do the things you want out of him and I can promise you everything will fall into place.
273077
question for you why would you want to take the other guy back the other guy has showed his true colors he will leave you again good luck
241979
I'm sorry you had to go through this, I know how much it hurts when your spouse cheats on you.  I wish I could say you could trust him and that everything will be fine but the truth is he crossed a line and now that line really doesn't exist for him.  I'm sure he regrets hurting you but I doubt if he really regrets that he was with this other woman.  I tried to forgive my ex when she cheated and believe her when she said she wanted to work it out but ultimately she did it again and I realized I could never trust her again.  Trust is one of the basic foundations in a marriage and once it is gone it isn't easily repaired.  I think you need to decide what is right for you and if you don't believe you can honestly trust him again then divorce is your only option.
765532
Sadly and embarrassingly enough - I know that situation and have been on the girl side. I loved my new bf and just could bear the fact that my ex is just not noticing and forgetting me. Stupid enough I have been to start calling him and even meeting with him saying that I want his friendship. But really I just wanted him to be mine again even though I didn't really need him!!!\n\nBe careful women are fools!! It might not be the same situation, but based on what you said and what I've had it really looks like it!
852768
I think you might not want to because they might be the same and he just wants so booty..so i would check him out first....and i don't think you should worry about your ex because you caught him with another girl when you guys were still together!
286975
It doesn't sound like you want him so it would be WRONG to go back to him.\n\nAlso it didn't work out the first time, so it probably wont work this time.
763351
Simply, curiousity with a little bit of wonder, maybe even jealousy.  Jealousy is questionable.  However, you don't understand why he was with her and really you don't need to or have to.  You might want to know why they broke up.  You may have deep down fears of them coming back around to each other since you don't understand why they were even together to begin with.  What you should remember is that he is with you and not her now.  If he isn't doing anything to see her, be around her, or have any sort of contact with her you really have nothing to be worried about.  If he is, then have concerns.  If he talks about her etc.  Put it out of your head if those things aren't happening and just enjoy that he is with you.