my 16 yr old daughter is not givinig attention to her studies.she is thinking about love etc. all the time.?
114624
A sisteen year old is thinking about the opposite sex all the time because her "hermones" are kicking in big time at that age!  It's going to be that way for awhile, but as she developes and becomes more mature she will settle down.  For most studies are difficult because they are so distracted by the changes going on in their bodies.  The teens are a very confusing time, so be there for her, answer her questions, and "instill good moral values" in her, and a creeer will follow one day.  Don't put a lot of pressure on her as growing up and pier pressue is enough stress to deal with.  Plus the more you push can often make the person pull away and you aleniate yourself so much that they won't listen to "anything" you say.  Instead they will rebel and that can mean "trouble",... for both of you.\n\nDon't you remember being sixteen?  We do tend to forget sometimes!\n\nGive her time and LOTS OF LOVE! \n\nPersonally I pray for guidance, because I know the Lord will answer my prayers.  He always does.
21774
I am a pesky parent. my 21yr old lives any from home and goes to college and I still talk to her about her grades.She knows that I only want the best for her and that I am concerned and love about her.If I didn't pester her,she would think I didn't care.She says she loves me for doing it[even tho sometimes I am a pesky parent]She wouldn't have it any other way!!!p.s.I hope the answer you got from brnbrn3 was a joke even tho it was not funny. Ihave a 17yr old grand daughter who ran away on nov 21 2005,we haven't heard from her yet!!! An update incase you were wondering or praying for us.They found my 17yr old grand daughter on Monday Jan 9 2006.She is fine other than the fact that she has really messed up her life.She had big plans to go to college now she has missed so much school this year ,she can't even graduate.She was a straight A student  Senior year.She now sits in detention awaiting her day in court to see what the judge is going to do with her.So don't run away,and someday when you are sucessful, you will love your pesky parent as much as my daughter loves me.and someday hopfully my granddaugher will ,too!!!
1093294
Maybe she is just disagreeing with u alot!?\n\nNo seriously, my daughter used to do it.  As long as she is developing normally, i.e pulling up to stand, trying words etc etc, I wouldn't be worried, my daughter grew out of it.\n\nIf your concerned see your paediatrician.
960656
Make it some important to you as it is important to her. My 13 year old was just recently in love and he was sooo happy. Also tell your sister to take things slooooooooooooooooow.
26764
Everything seems fine, Just remember you have 4 more years of life expierence than she does. So you'll have to respect that. \n\nLet her finish school before doing anything that might change your lifes.\n\nGood luck
117307
Obviously something has changed somewhere with your daughter's life.  Children don't suddenly change drastically in their behavior and in their approach to school.  Neither do children suddenly become "lazy".  We need only watch children playing to realize they are not lazy.  \n\nSome things you might check out are whether she is being bullied at school, for example.  Is she happy at school?   How does she get along with her teacher?  Her classmates?  Has she changed schools?  Has there been a change in her life at home?  A separation?  A new baby?  In order to address this problem, you need to find the cause of it.  \n\nAnother area to think about is that there is often quite a jump academically from third grade to fourth grade.  Children are expected to be much more mature in their apporach to school and learning in general in fourth grade.  She may be having a difficult time adapting to that change and to the different expectations.\n\nI tend to disagree with those who have suggested ADD, though it is often not identified in girls because the signs in girls are often quite different than with boys.  Keep in mind that if you do pursue the question of ADD/ADHD that there is no actual "test" that identifies ADD - it is identified by using questionaires.  However, if she were my daughter I would certainly get her a good physical check up, and make sure everything is ok medically.\n\nMy gut reaction is that there is something going on that you don't know about ... what you have described is not typical, and you should get to the bottom of it and find the cause.  The change in your daughter seems too drastic to me to just be underachievement if all was well until this school year.
314318
Maybe it is not that kind of love.  Find a way to spend more time with her and make sure before you just lay it on her and completely blow her mind.
475318
It sounds like she's not passionate enough about anything (except maybe her b/f) to stick to it right now.  That's not at all unusual for someone in her 20's.  It might be good idea fro her to take some time off to explore the world and mature a little bit.  If she really wants to finish, she will.  If she doesn't, it's not worth trying to force her.  Also perhaps she has some ADHD or personality problems that are making it harder for focus and cope with school?  She should see a counselor.
343517
hi im not a big expert, and i dont know u, but as far as i understand u feeling this way is quite normal. no offence but i ges its normal for women to go throu this. i know loads of them who sunddly get in to this phase... so dont worry about it too much ok, its not a big problem its just a part of growing up. u sound pretty smart so i ges u will do the correct thing. stick to your studies. u said that u have never met him ! i dont think its really possible to love someone without really knowing that person. but i wont get in to that cos its cool. All i will say is the way u feel is quit normal so dont worry about it. its all about growing up so just take your time and enjoy it ok, it will pass, and please continu your studies trust me u will never regret it. hpoe things work out take care god bless.
477274
She might not know she is doing this consciously.  She must really need a lot of attention and this is how she feels she can get some.  Just calmly and rationally ask her about some details that you heard from others that she didn't tell you about.  Unfortunately, this will catch up with her and she will reap what she is sowing.
976288
I AM NOT SURPRISE TO HEAR A 14 YEAR old girl talk like that. she is still young and full of dreams. She is not ready for a special relationship and so are you. What is happening in you is "puppy love". What you can do now is to just meet her in a friendship level. Don't rush. Just enjoy each other's frienship and not thinking about "being on".\n\nConcentrate in your studies and make friends with other girls. You don't even have to think is she made the wrong decision or not. \n\nALL THE BEST.
152262
Is she only doing this at school? If so, you might find out what's going on at school. Maybe she has some anxiety related to school. Have you tried asking her if something is wrong? Whatever you do, do not get angry or punish her for this; it will only make it worse for both of you. Be patient and understanding and she will be much more likely to talk to you about it.\n\nThere are many physical reasons as well as psychological reasons for this but, if it's happening at school only it probably isn't physical. If the problem doesn't go away soon, I would consult a professional. Pediatrician is good place to start and can refer you to another Dr., if necessary.
28612
Yes talk to her but most of all listen to her for things she is interested in then engage her in convesation about that subject and show interest even if it is not your cup of tea.  She will come around if she is human and if she does not tell her to phone home!!!
485878
PLEASE I AM BEGGING U DO NOT GO STRAIGHT TO THE DOCTOR LIKE THAT LAST ANSWER SUGGESTED AND PUMP UR DAUGHTER FULL OF MEDS BECAUSE THAT MAY NOT BE THE ANSWER AND GIVING HER MEDS THAT SHE DOESN'T NEED CAN MAKE HER WORSE\nLETS FACE IT SHE IS 8 YEARS OLD. SHE WONT CONCENTRATE AS MUCH AS U WANT HER TO IN SCHOOL MOM, AFTER ALL SHE IS STILL A KID. I HAVE AN 8 YR OLD LIL BOY AND HIS TEACHER AND I HAVE TO WORK TOGETHER TO GET HIM TO PAY ATTENTION, HE LIKES TO TALK IN CLASS AND GOOF OFF SOMETIMES, THE TEACHER AND I FELT IT BEST TO MOVE HIS DESK AWAY FROM HIS DISTRACTIONS UNTIL HE EARNS THE RIGHT TO BE BACK IN HIS NORMAL SPOT PLUS AT HOME I TALK TO HIM EVERY DAY ABOUT HOW IMPORTANT IT IS FOR HIM TO PAY ATTENTION AND TO DO HIS BEST IN SCHOOL I ALWAYS TRY TO WORK OUT AN AWARD SYSTEM IF HE BRINGS HOME A GOOD NOTE FROM HIS TEACHER AND SAY 4 OUT OF 5 DAYS HE HAS GOOD NOTES THAN I GIVE HIM AN AWARD LIKE GOING TO THE PARK A SMALL TOY FROM WAL-MART. IT DOESN'T HAVE TO MONETARY BUT SOMETHING THAT SHE WILL APPRECIATE AND CHOOSES TO DO WITH IN REASON
196312
maybe she isn't really looking inside of u and is a little comfused if YOUR the 1 she wants 2 be with 4 the rest of her life! Maybe she is having second thoughts!! GOOD LUCK!
528454
you will find that some girls and woman are like that. the reason is your girl has a BRAIN she thinks and feels too. she might have ignored you. that was rude of her. but really, I think she was lieing to you. why would her messenger be on while she is studying if not to only speak to you. or who? sometimes anger makes us make mistakes. to get even with her is a mistake you are only hurting yourself. when you can be kissing each other, if you are adults. since in my city it is against the law to allow 2 minors to kiss. trust your gut feeling. sometimes it is better to know how she really is before you tie the knot or get married. the pain you went thru. its part of life and love..one thing for sure...love should not hurt so much..so if you are being hurt..perhaps she does not love you as much as you love her.
638544
Help her relax.  Let grade go.  If you think about it, they are so little in the big picture.  You want her to be healthy and happy.  So let her know if she does her best and then flunks everything, it's okay.  In fact, make doing your best the goal -- not good grades.  Get around her -- make her world as safe (emotionally) as possible.  You might want to do this by creating a safety ritual.  Me and my son have a saying I ask him, "What could make me stop loving u?"   I answer, "nothing -- never"  he knows that I may be disappointed with some of the things he does but never stop loving him.  So he can come to me no matter what.  Let her be a baby if she needs to -- we all need to sometimes -- hold her and help her come back to here and now by gently assuring her that you are there and won't go anywhere.  \n\nTalk to the school councelor and tell her the "Flag" will be removed.  It borders on illegal -- she should not be labeled without going through very specific channels.  If they don't, walk in with a lawyer.  Schools should not be doing that to kids, they should be about the success of the child, not tracking and labelling.  \n\nContinue with the therapy.  Get her involved in a fun non-competive activity -- skating, bowling or something she can do with you and/or friends. \n\nDon't give up.