is anyone in the military or a spouse?
105964
I am a wife of a Sgt. in the USMC (United States Marine Corps)
1067606
Bella, I am a male with 22 years experience in the Canadian Military. I am also married.  Firstly, if you have chemistry and feel this is Mr. Right your major concerns are:  (1) are you willing to relocate and up and leave behind friends family etc for your significant other.  This can have be a major stressor in Military Relationships from own personal experience.  (2) He could be called away to a "high risk" combat environment, which would leave you alone for prolonged periods. There is also your career aspirations to consider.  The military is better at caring for family then in the past, however, their first concerns is still exigencies of service or service first.  You have to prepare yourself mentally for that.  My final piece of advice is for both of you to sit with the Military Social Worker.  He/she can give you great advice and insight into what it is like being a military spouse.  It is an honor to serve ones country,  and he can also take his military training after his 3 year engagement and apply to the civilian sector.  Many civilian employers find military background and training extremely marketable  Finally, I wish you both well and and all the best to the both of you as you embark on the great adventure
54015
well, I see this from two perspectives-- I am a military man, and I have ALWAYS been faithful to my wife.  But I know that this is quite the exception....From my fellow Marines I know that quite the opposite is the norm. I was a military policeman, and I saw all the hanky-panky "my husband's on deployment"- and my uh, "cousin" is coming over- nonsense as I patrolled the housing areas.  Sadly, I must agree that MOST (Not all!) military men --And an equal number of Delta Whiskeys (dependent wives) are down with OPP- as we said "back in the day"
185617
I have been an Army wife for 4 years and and been with my hubby for 6 years. Yes I Love him more, its more like a deeper love. It takes alot of understanding, but its worth every deployment, and every fight over the little things. He is the bravest, most loveing man I know. I thank God every day for bringing him into my life. GOD BLESS OUR TROOPS!!!!!!!!!!
21314
I'm a military spouse and have to deal with that myself.  Of course, number one, don't fill your hours talking to or spending time alone with someone of the opposite sex.  That will make it too easy to at least have an "emotional" affair, if not slip into a physical one.  But try writing letters and e-mails to your spouse, bettering yourself while he/she is gone (working out, learning to cook, joining a club or group, volunteering, taking a second job, reading, painting, restoring furniture, taking an evening or online class, etc.).  I try to make sure my focus while my husband is away is on what I will do better when he's back - don't lose the focus on the spouse, or that will make it harder! - and on staying busy so I don't have time to just sit and miss him.  Hope this helps.
526338
well being a military wife i get 2 different kinds of looks i tell people I'm married to a military man and i support him but that i don't support the war its my right as a us citizen to have an opinion so when my hubby is deployed you bet I'm right there with the best of them praying and waiting for them to come home . i support him and his job and all the troops over there now and to come.
1085654
As we all know when you marry someone in the military it is going to take ALOT of work (if you look at the HIGH divorce rate). You have to be willing to go through the changes together, no marriage is perfect. Just as much as he does things the "urk" you, you're doing the same thing as well (example-not talking to him when yall having problems, or not turning to him for solutions to save yall marriage). Just because your marriage is missing somethings shouldn't give u a reason to leave. If that was the case then you would have NEVER married him so there is something about him that's making you stay. the both of you have to be willing to save the marriage because one person cant do it alone. YES things can get better. When you're in a marriage there is NO such things as WASTING each other time....But I will say this MAYBE marriage is NOT for EVERYONE....so if this doesn't work out maybe is you not him.......I'm just being real!
894263
not every one is strong enough to be a military spouse.  \n\nso, which do you want more..her, or to go Active Duty?  Can you honestly say you wouldn't resent her at some point if you stayed with her, but didn't go Active?\n\nUltimately, do what will make you happy.  do not EVER give up on a dream just because of some woman.  And I say this as a ten plus year Navy Spouse.
657348
My husband is active duty, but is able to retire because he has served 20 years. I enjoy being an officers wife. He is often gone, which is a down side, but during those times I am able to bond with my girlfriends. As stated in a previous message when he returns it feels like we are newlyweds. I also enjoy the constant moving. If you move to a place that you dont like, it's no big deal because you know that in two or three years you will be gone. I work also and when he is not home I do not have to rush home to make sure that his dinner is prepared properly and the house is in proper order.
296805
I am currently in the middle of hiring 5 new employees and I also live in an area with 3 bases so I can relate to your question. I think your military back ground is a plus and a minus for you. First and foremost military personal tend to have a higher sense of loyalty to their jobs and better discipline. I also find integrity of military to be a lot higher so I love having them as employees. On the down side I am concerned with call ups and deployments. There is an extreme shortage of manpower here in my area and I must have people that will be there.They can not be easily replaced. I need to be my employees #1 priority, behind family of course.
844046
i have been a navy wife and i have been an army wife.  it depends on where you end up being stationed for either on what it's like.  when you are in your home city (or close enough where you don't live on post or deal with the FRG) you're only real source of what's going on is your husband - which is actually helpful as you don't hear 40 different things - none of which are right, and you don't get 4 billion emails about crap you don't care about, and you don't get stuck in the damn rumormill.  \nit was fine in the navy - when he left, i stayed with my parents in san diego because that was where he was stationed.  we are abroad now and we did the blue to green so we are now army.  it's a wonderful experience, but at the same time totally frustrating!  my FRG (i'm sorry, FRG is Family Readiness Group and you refer to the leader as the FRG) never  sends me any relevant information about my husband's unit and yet i get all this useless information that i don't care about.  there is supposed to be a POC (point of contact person) who calls at least once a month - i've been here 6 months, 2 months with my husband gone and she has never called - i don't even know who my POC is!  granted, i don't go to the FRG meetings - but why would i go when they don't do anything that is relevant to me and they make it difficult for me to go with a 14 month old?  \nalso living on post leaves you very vulnerable to the rumor mill, it seems especially the higher ranked enlisted wives do it.  they also tend to wear their husband's rank - abosolutely unacceptable!  myself and the 3 ladies i have made friends with are the wives of an E3, an E5, and 2 E6's (one E6 is only friends with me) so we don't care, and that's the way it is supposed to be in housing.  your rank does not go with you when you are out of uniform.  everyone gets the same respect out of uniform and since wives are never in uniform... yeah.  but it tends to not work that way.  there is this whole web of crap to deal with.  i tend to not.  i have also already made it clear that if i am included in this rumormill i will take them to court on charges of slander and defemation of character - i won't put up with it, but most wives will and that's why it's so widespread.\n\nif you are going to be stationed abroad, don't expect any help from the army to get you to your husband quickly - it was 6 months for all the paperwork to go through because no one could tell us everything we needed to do it so as we got one thing done we were then told another thing we needed to do and since he was already in europe and i was in arizona it was very difficult.\n\nother than that, it's fine.  you get to meet new people, have new experiences - if you live on post it's like it's own little world... kinda wierd to me, but you may like it.  and depending on your personality and what your husband does in the army you may not ever notice the rumors spreading like wildfire.\n\nmy tips, make friends with your housing person before you get a residence on base, find out where everything you NEED is at on base (they give you lots of useless info you have to sift through) and try to make friends with your neighbors, they are going to be the people you see most.
843769
Why not become a real estate agent yourself?  Its listed as a good choice for military spouses.  \nSites like         http://www.military.com/spouse       give good advice on careers for spouses and have search engines to look for jobs.  Getting any type of degree will make it easier to get a job at you new base.  Also getting a job on base or a goverment job is a good idea.  You won't take a pay decrease if you are forced to move.
397849
Practically nil, actually.  Spouse co location is only good for a couple of hundred miles, and they must be in the same service.  Only in rare cases are Army and Navy bases located remotely close toone another.
70172
I'm married to a Marine and met alot of military men.  I think you have to meet him.  Alot of the guys are genuine, but there will always be game players.  I'd really like to think that a young man in a combat zone wouldn't be out there just for his own amusement, so meet him, get to know him for real(BE CAREFUL, TAKE SOMEONE YOU CAN TRUST) and then let yourself make a decision.  Good luck.  I hope you find your man!
263823
ok well i am not a spouse yet but i have been with a military man for 3 years now in that time he has gotten out and then back in...we moved to his home state where his parents were and just couldnt make it so he got back in...once you are in its hard to get out and make a living for yourself...and when someone does i give them all the credit in the world because we couldnt
343982
being a military wife is not the easiet thing in the world. I definitely give you props! But its alot like any other job hes going to have to be the one to step up and take a stand for himself. there really is nothing that you can do at this point in time. Sit down and have a talk with him and express your feelings to him. Its his job to take care of this himself theres nothing you can do. If hes not willing to do something about it then thats his problem. Dont let his job affect you marriage
466150
I know what you mean.  My husband is a soldier in the Army.  We spend a lot of time apart with him in very dangerous situations. It would be really easy to get down, or be negative.  I just keep in mind that my husband is a great and brave man fighting for those too weak to fight for themselves.  What keeps me going is the pride I feel for him, and the wonderful moments come everyday when you treasure each other the way we do.\n\nGet Blessed!