married 24yrs, left home for 2yrs in 2000, i have never felt the same since i wnt out no more feelings for her
117177
If there are no more feelings for her then why stay?  You like making her miserable, not to mention yourself?  Get on with your life so she can too
1067847
yeah these sound like she made up her mind of geting a divorce and she want to move on this happen in marriage you just got to get ready for a divorce and make new plan in your life there are other women out there i know it real hard on you right know but when she leave you it going to take you a few month to get over the feeling you just lost the one you love but it well get better over time. i wish you the best of luck.
13268
Can you be a bit more specific about the situation? How does SHE feel? Is she separated? Unhappy? You definitely aren't nuts though. Many have been there before and will be in this situation again.
241350
I am sorry to hear that. That is a very painful process.  Every minute it's always the person in your mind.  I know how you feel.  Well, I would suggest a few ideas, they might not be the best.  However, time will eventually heals and I hope soon. My suggestion would be: (1) go out and meet new friends.  If you can't find new friends, at least hang out with the old ones (2) take a break and go for vacation with some friends if possible (3) take on hobbies - gymn, dance classes, swimming, meditation, etc .... (4) volunteer working at nursing homes and hospitals because sometimes seeing the others who have worse situation than you will make you realize how fortunate you are compared to the rest (5) watch movies, DVD's, etc ..... (6) if you believe in GOD, then you should also start praying. The bottom line is, you must keep you mind occupied most of the time. Therefore there is no room for him to bug your mind.  You must take courage to accept it and move on with your life.  I hope you find these tips helpful.  Meanwhile, I wish you the best.
1001767
I just lost mine 2 days ago and I hadn't seen her in 11 yrs. I had left my home country and have not gone back since then. Also I am not able to leave right now to attend the funeral, it is tearing me up so much.  I feel your pain and understand where you are in this.  As hard as it may seem we simply have to think of the good times in memory and how much joy she brought into our lives.  Life is never the same when your mother passes away, however you must go on.  Maybe you can do something together with family that will keep her memory alive.
1154062
I think yes.. you are..I know someone got divorce and remarried again to his ex wife..\n\nThere's no harm for taking another chance of going back to your wife, not only because of the fact that you have a daughter.  Somebody said "love is sweatier at the second time around.  Talk to your ex wife and discuss things with her.  Try to know if she stills love you.. Intuition will not deny if she still have feelings for you,you will feel it right from the bottom of your heart.  You just have to take time, especially after all what happen you are still friends.. It will not be difficult to bring back the things again.. If this not work, at least you try.. and give yourself a break and focus yourself on your child...\n\nThe girl living with you right now, be honest to her.. If you dont really love her, why waste time? or why hurt her?  Honesty is always a pain for everyone, but remember it always brings you peace of mind.  No things in this world greater than having a peace of mind.  Knowing that you are being fair to everyone.
260006
I understand your loneliness completely, and it is a very difficult emotion to deal with, maybe you may feel better if I were to share with you the fact that I was once married, I loved pure and true, and was abused and hurt.\n\nI then remarried 3 years later, and although cautious at first, I learned to give again whole heartily and loved again pure and true, and was abused and hurt again.\n\nI now have been single for 10 years, and I despise loneliness, although I am very happy with myself, and love myself.\n\nAnd although I have only been allowed the opportunity to be a part time father, I feel a great and powerful sense of loss, as I have never believed in Divorce, however this is the reality with in our society today, that it takes two to Merrie, and only one to divorce with no reason stated or given, they call it no fault.\n\nI must say that had I ever known my marriages would have ended up in Divorce, I would have rather been lonely, and just happy being me.  Although I have no regrets, and love my children dearly.\n\nMaybe possibly if you were to think of all the things of which you would have to sacrifice with in the confines of a relationship, especially it your partner were to abuse or hurt you, then you could take more satisfaction in your single status, and appreciate it.
317219
TIME....thats the only answer im afraid.it will get easier in time.but for the moment its a big pain in the heart.im 37 mate & i still get those feeling from 4yr ago.hope this helps a little.take it easy for awhile..
115769
When did your feelings change?\n\nWhat happened outside of your marriage at that time?\n\nYou may simply be looking for an excuse to leave him.  Your likely some where around 30 and that is a tough time in a marriage or out.\n\nKeep in mind that marriages take a great deal of work and nearly all of them have challenging periods.  That’s when you knuckle down and find a way through the tough times.  Your feelings changed once and they can change again.  Just imagine yourself ten years down the road after you have left him, simply because you didn’t try to work through a tough patch.  \n\nIt sounds as if everything else is okay and since you’re the one disturbed, maybe it is you.  If it is you, you might consider that your feelings toward him are relative to your feelings toward someone else.  \n\nMy wife and I have been together 51 years and married 46 years.  It has taken lots of work through tough times, but somehow it has maintained.
354794
THAT IS REALLY A DIFFICULT QUESTION. THE PAIN CAN NEVER EVER BE ERASED COMPLETELY. BUT TIME WILL PROBABLY LESSEN THE PAIN BIT BY BIT. PROBABLY TO A TINY PRICK IN YOUR HEART NOW AND THEN. WITH TIME YOU WILL LEARN TO FORGET ,WELL ALMOST FORGET , AND PROBABLY RELIVE THE SWEET MEMORIES WHICH ARE ASSOCIATED WITH YOUR WIFE.TRY TO REMEMBER THE NICE THINGS AND TRAIN YOURSELF TO FACE REALITY. WHAT HAS HAPPENED CANNOT EVER BE REVERTED, BUT YOU HAVE TO CARRY ON, FOR THE SAKE OF YOURSELF AND YOUR OTHER BELOVED ONES.BE BRAVE MAN. THINGS WILL BE SOLVED BY TIME ITSELF. PRAY TO GOD TO EASE YOUR PAIN.BEST OF LUCK.
505826
...been there brother...it hurts worse than anyone will ever understand.\n\nFriends and family are great, but you know as well as I do, that you can only be around them so much.  Sometimes you just need time alone.  Try not to spend too much time alone.  I know, I still struggle with that and my divorce was final 6 months ago.  \n\nMan, I could write a book to you right now.  It is just SO hard dude.  \n\nWhatever you do, don't spend all your time thinking about all the great times, the great traits of your wife and, most importantly, beating yourself up over the situation, (kicking yourself over anything and everything you could have done better, blaming yourself for not making her happier and feeling like you failed).  THIS IS WAY EASIER TO SAY THAN TO DO!  I know.  This is the trap that I fell in and caused me to become WAY, WAY depressed.\n\nYou are gonna ride a roller coaster of up and down emotion for the next few years.  The low times are gonna be LOW, LOW, and the high times will be pretty good, believe it or not.\n\nWriting has become my happy place.  Actually, it doesn't really make me happy, it just releaves me of the pain that I am experiencing at the moment.  I don't always write about the divorce, feelings or depression.  Sometimes, I write about current events, events that really touched me, friends, etc.  It really doesn't matter.  Writing just gives me an outlet to release emotion without bothering others.
585416
maybe you need to sit down and talk to her, i have foster parents and they dont treat me right either, its hard to open up your true feelings at first, but you need to sit down with her and with a counsler or even better a pastor and have her say what she feels right to your face, if she ruined your marriage then there is something wrong with her, something that she doesnt want to talk about at the moment but she needs to GOOD LUCK SWEETIE hope for the best
949566
honey I so feel your pain. I want to give you some advice and please read carefully. Do not waste one more moment of your life fretting over this woman. This situation will always be a thorn in your side if you let it. DONT LET IT. You said your not a hateful person but if you let it this or she will make you one. Trust me I have been married to a man for 10 years and his ex is the beast master GOG OF MAGOG.I finally had to let it go but it just about ate me alive before I realized. I became bitter, hateful, obsessed, you name it. It will hurt no one but you.
944919
Hey Thor, I've been there. So, i can feel what you are going thru. Let me tell you this..Leave the past alone. Dont think of it. I didnt see you writting that you love her. True that u have feelings for her & she is ur 1st. But still, she broke up with you.i.e dont want to be with you. Move on...leave ny thing that remind you with her. Look to the future. It will take time to move on i know...but time is all what you have
945244
I'm so sorry about what has happened to you... *HUGS*... You have to think hard about everything. Weigh things carefully. Should you and your wife get back together, there should be love for each other.  The first thing that you have to do is to fix yourself, physically and emotionally. Get help from your family. I know how it feels to be hurting inside, not knowing what to do with the feeling. It kills you inside. You want to cry but crying isn't enough to let your feelings out. Just fix yourself first. More importantly, fix yourself emotionally. From there, you'll know what to do next...
895616
been down this kind of road your walking on now, the pain will never be gone completely, as time goes on the pain will ease up and you will regain your self back. learn from this with the understanding that not all women do this to their husbands. and people do make mistakes with some being devastating to the ones left holding their harts after it being ripped from their chest. \n\ngetting her back is what you want for you want your life to return to the way it was prior to any cheating, getting her back isn't what you need right now, you'll have trust issues with her that will drive you both apart and working out problems in a relationship will take two people that want it to work, truly want it to work. at this time i don't see this being on her list of things to do.\n\nit's all about you and your kids right now, try as hard as you can not to think that your going to get her back in time. if and when this ever does come around and the opportunity presents it's self to you then and only then should you leap to the chance. it's going to be a upward walk everyday for some time now, and you must keep you mind on what will be the best for you and your kids, her watching this will in time show that you are the stronger parent and she might have made the most devastating mistake of her life.\n\nif and when she does want to return to being a family again you need to now that it will never be as it was, no amount of work can change your memory and that memory will have issures with her and the choises she made. untill you have walked this road and feel the pain it has to offer you, people have their own words to offer you and I too had told many people that i would do this and that, and the day my ears heard the word from the love of my life, i pray others will never have the pleasure of hearing them in their life. \n\ni would tell every one dealing with this pain not try reconnecting with their partner till the pain has passed and your ready to try woking on the real problems in hand, most people never wake up one morning and head out the door to cheat on their partner, most is the aftermath of a problem at home or with their partner, finding out what the real problem is and how to overcome it is where you need to start working up to the cheating, and working it in this order will let you know why she felt the way she did.\n\ntime will heal the pain and learning from the past is the only way we can improve our furture, take your time and good luck with the path your walking down, remembering that your not walking it alone for thats why it's a path, many have walked it and many more will.
821659
Had many of the same feelings when I first met my fiance.  Luckily they have subsided a bit and am now more able to lead a more "normal" life.  I still do think of her quite often and by no means does it mean that I think or respect he any less.  It's just that the initial honeymoon stage has worn off, took about 2 years and so am a little more grounded now.  Best of luck to you and yours.