what is the secret to mariage and how do you keep the fire going?
107792
The golden rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself." It applies in marriage too.\nRemember what makes them most happy (within reason) and do those things.\nAnything good is worth the effort!!!
1138
Here's a hint:  Men like women to show initiative with romance and eroticsm--too often in relationships it's considered the "man's job" to get things moving! This will sound corny, but give it a shot:  First, if you've got kids, send them to the grandparents for the night in advance without him knowing (say on a Friday).  Next, turn off all the lights in the house and place scented candles in the bedroom and run a hot bubble bath just before he normally arives home.  Have some wine and two wine glasses at the ready on the coffee table, and rose petals on the floor leading a trail to the bedroom--or whereever you're most memorable encounter that you can remember occurred.  Personally, I like David Sanborn or some other smooth jazz playing in the background. Music is important to setting the mood, and if you've got cable or a dish, you can tune it to the music of your choice. Just before he gets home, slip into a nice satin & lace nightie and cover it with a heavy robe.  When he gets to the door, be there waiting to flash him and let him know what you've got in store for the evening.  Not in a crude way, mind you.  Most importantly, take your time...don't rush.  The anticipation of that which is to come will be as intense as the act itself.  Hope that helps!\nPeace,\nJayZ
519553
Try asking her what turns her on. (I would say find out more about your future mate sexually before tying the knot but that don't always work. So communication is the key!!! Never and I mean never stop communicating!!! You wife may have a kink streak that you haven't known existed!!! Three things: 1) Communication 2) Be open minded 3) Have fun!!\n\nGood luck!!
145825
How you win their affection is how you keep them. If you have to win her with a gimmick, that is the only way you are going to keep her. Sorry, but you need to find out what a woman really wants. This something that unfortunately we often find out too late. Like on our deathbed.\n\nBut, seriously, women want a trusted confidant, a provider, a listener, and a person ready to get his hands dirty doing tasks around the house. Often the best ability is dependability.
343207
Ask lots of questions and take and show a true interest in the answers. Think of it as learning something from other's viewpoints! It can be about anything you want if you're asking the right questions. Is your future mom-in law a great cook? Ask her how she chooses vegetables at the market. Is she a great dancer? Ask her how she was introduced to music and if she thinks dancing is good for mental health, etc. Forget about what you have to say though, because talking to hear your own voice is NOT good communication, even in the small talk arena! The right and appropriate words will come to you when you listen! Just listen openly, and ask lots of question. You will be seen as very wise and kind in doing so and make a great impression. \n\nThe best conversationalist is the one who is the greatest listener. Very few words of your own are needed. :-) But in doing this, they'll want to know all about you! So you'll have your chance to talk --- but still focus mostly on listening...if you want to be a great small -- or big -- talker!
358101
use your own sacred space although there is a new coven opening called the circle of dragons email rachel@wytch.fsnet.com.uk  her address is on the internet\n\nor contact the university of kent\n\nalternetively all you need to do is find somewhere that suits and that you can have a fire
587600
I think great sex should never be lost in a marriage.  Even if you're already married you should keep the mystery in you.  What I do with my husband is even if we are very close I always keep a safe distance and time for my self and he said it drives him crazy to feel that even though I am already his wife it seems like he can never get hold of me completely.  To keep the spark in a marriage, a man should be kept challenged.  Keep your individuality but be a good and loyal wife and mother at the same time.  I think that'll do it.
86189
never close the doors of communication. live like two best friends and share your inner thoughts and secrets. don't be afraid to bear your soul ... the good, the bad and the ugly.  and be non-judgmental, understanding and accepting when your spouse does.\n\nwhen problems arise, all of our discussions take place in a bubble bath with a bottle of wine and one rule: no one leaves the tub until the issue is resolved or we agree to disagree. (it's hard to argue in the nude and so easy to kiss and make up)\n\nalways do unto others as you would have them do unto you. in other words, if you wouldn't "eat" it, don't "serve" it.
953561
I have been married 9yrs, so I'm still learning too. Marriage is a constantly changing thing. It is important to remember that you are all still adjusting to something that is new & exciting & even scary. Some people handle this differently than others. Keep telling him how you feel. It's crucial that there be no secrets in a marriage. If you are truly concerned that this is not just an adjustment issue, you should explain to him what it is that you want from this marrauge. He can't possibly know unless you tell him. You need to keep the lines of communication open. Without it, a marraige cannot possibly survive. Good luck
674568
Best tip?  Don't compete with him. You're a woman. Act like\nit. Don't act like a man. You don't want him to act like a\nwoman, do you? Role reversal will ruin a marriage. Accept\nyour individual strengths and fill in for each others weak-\nnesses. Men don't think like women. Don't try to undermine\nhis manhood. Admire his intellect, courage, and stamina.\nDon't detract from those "macho" traits that make him a man.\nHelp him, if he asks. Your femininity is a gift. Don't use\nit as a tool. Don't play head games. Don't waste time play-\ning "Hint". Tell him what you need and want. You may not get\nit all, but if you're good to him, you can be sure he'll \ntry. And if love fades, consider it a temporary condition.\nTip toe through it. Use your loving tenderness at every\nopportunity, but don't patronize. Men sometimes act like\nboys, let him. He may be inept at something, don't accent it. Let him love you. Let him not love you. If he's working\nhard, don't stop him. If he's not, gently motivate him. Don't take anything for granted. Know him, his moods, his\njoys, and his troubles. Add to his joys, not his troubles.\nDon't ever stir up the bad from the past. Expect the little\nproblems ahead, prepare for them. Don't make life changing\ndecisions based on bad temporary female feelings. Never put\nanyone before him. And remember: men aren't always the\nbrightest crayons in the box. Give him chances to get it\nright. Don't just say it, but reaffirm your love often,\nespecially when things are going wrong. Don't forget what\nyou're fighting for. Remind him, if needed. And if he does\nthis for you too, you should be fine. One more thing, turn\noff the T.V., it is filled with silly notions of what love\nand struggle are all about. And about the sex tips...\njust kidding. Sweet dreams, you two.
100863
You need to be stubborn, hard-headed and just decided from the start that you will not get a divorce.  You'll work through the problems, the drama, the inconviences.  You have to WANT the marriage to stay intact.
989300
DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO KEEP YOUR SEXLIFE GOING STRONG AS LONG AS YOUR COOL WITH WHATEVER IT IS GO FOR IT!!!!
795794
Knowledge  is  the  remedy,   once  you  understand  (like  knowing  people  who  use  filthy  language  are  scum)  you  Will  tell  them  to  shut up  until  they  learn  manners.\nLearn  martial  arts  so  if  someone beats  you,  then  you  can  whack  them  back.\nIf  someone  ill  treats  your  wife,  then  you  should  know  better  that  you  don't   beat  them  for  verbal,  but  again  tell  them  to  leave  until  they  learn  manners.   \nWhat  are  you  actually   afraid  of  ?    really  ?   understand  that ,  then  learn  how  to  deal.    Even  when  you  are  afraid  start  standing  up  a  little  bit  at  a time.   Eventually  you  will  develop  a  backbone.            good  luck
456556
If you're of age, 1 Corinthians 7 gives you a clear solution: get married.  If you go this route, TREAT YOUR WIFE RIGHT -- sacrificial love is the order of the day (Ephesians 5:22-33).  I'd also recommend Eggerichs' book _Love and Respect_; it will help you get started on the right foot.  Don't worry about finding "the right one" as though God hid your bride-to-be under a rock someplace.  If you need to get married, then find a woman who is (a) a believer, (b) devoted to the Lord, and (c) willing, and get hitched.  Get those three qualifications lined up, treat her right, and she'll take good care of you.  On the other hand, if a marriage of convenience scares you a little bit, then realize that curbing your problem is your only other option.\n\nNow for the tough part: discipline your mind.  If you're getting married, the two of you should study Song of Songs together.  Dillow, _Solomon on Sex_ and Fruchtenbaum, _Biblical Lovemaking_ are great resources for you -- buy them and use them.  Fill your head with biblical truth about sex.  Also, discipline your mind to think about YOUR WIFE when you think about sex.  Cultivate vivid memories of the mindblowing times you've had together.  When some pretty young lady showing too much skin crosses your path and you catch yoursef thinking, "Man I'd love to...," STOP.  Quote relevant Scripture to yourself, and remind yourself (by way of one of those juicy memories) of how God has provided for your sexual needs.  \n\nNow, if you're not getting married, you need to cultivate that kind of discipline anyway.  Just the details are fdifferent. Bad news: you can't resist this temptation on your own.  Clearly you already recognize this.  Good news: You don't have to.  Find the relevant passages in Scripture and keep them in the forefront of your mind -- always.  Write them down on 3x5 cards and carry them around with you.  When you're in line at the bank or the grocery store, take them out and read through them.  Memorize them and recite them to yourself as you drive to work (or walk the halls at school -- I don't know how old you are).  You need to never let yourself be unaware of the truth about that behavior.  Study what Scripture says about it.  You already know it's wrong, so go from there: what are the results of this particular sin?  What is the nature of the sin?  What leads to it?  How do you best avoid it?  What examples does Scripture give you -- who avoided this sin, and what happened?  Who gave in to it, and what happened?  I'd suggest paying particular attention to the writings of Solomon (Proverbs and Ecclesiastes, I mean -- stay away from Song of Songs until you're married, or about to be).  With 600 wives and 300 concubines, he got more than you've ever dreamed about.  Listen to the man -- he knows what he's talking about when he tells you that pleasing God is more important.\nBlessings on you, brother.  Keep the faith; the Lord can get you there.
517430
1. ALWAYS REMBER TO HAVE FUN (Yes, you can be the boss and have fun. Burnt out people lose there grip on things) \n\n2. Don't let you position go to your head. (No one want a bossy that think that they a God)\n\n3. don't ask your staff to do something that you won't do yourself.( once they see you do it  once they will gladly do it)\n\n\n4.Be firm and never waver from it.( Yes, be understanding and compassionate but firm if your staff see weakness they will take advantage of it)\n\n5. If you have question always ask. ( It is better to be safe than sorry.
1102549
I'm 52.. libido is variable but it helps to find a lovely concubine! It depends on who you are with who can help to light your fire. Perhaps the other answers do play a part.. not smoking or drinking too much.. In addition if you have too much weght lose it and to dress and behave younger may help.. If you have a good feeling about yourself it can help alot.
457439
First you need to find one that is looking for a little seduction or two for fun as well.  Otherwise...be prepared to be seducing a basket case eventually.  And don't forget the complications of possibly breaking up the family unit.  An afternoon lunch is always the easist way to begin since most avalible wives looking for side fun might have this hour open for you.