How is it that you can forgive but, not forget?
115314
I have pondered this same thing..\n\nI can forgive someone for treating me poorly, but I will never forget how I felt when that happened.. \n\nI think it has to do with a little self preservation, and more to what you want to surround yourself with, and  not wanting to put yourself in a position to face the same types of offenses.\n\nForgetting it a very hard thing to do, because you naturally associate some things together.. like a favorite song from high school that instantly makes you feel a certain way when you hear it again, or the first time you laid eyes on your first born, or the first time your heart was broken.  You retain this data (I think) because it's all a learning process that later will help you value what is and isn't important. And the emotions tied to those things are memorized with your heart.
911571
It's absolutely necessary to forgive yourself.  If you don't, you'll carry the guilt around.  So, yes, you can do it.\n\nIf you're having a hard time being able to do that, I would seek out a good pastoral or therapist referral.  Forgiveness is critically important in all aspects of life.
53864
Yes.  Maybe later than sooner but yes.  Even the real BIG things.  My mother told me once, if I can't forgive, how do I expect God to forgive me.  That pretty much grounds my decisions.  It may take a long time.  It doesn't have to be instant but, it does have to happen.  And once you forgive them.  DROP IT.  Have you ever made a mistake and someone reminded you over and over and over and over and . . . it gets old.  Take your time and your space to work things out for you.  Don't be manipulative, it's not worth it (it may be a bit fun but not worth it).  Good Luck
389386
forgiving is hard sometimes but in the BIBLE forgiving is what God did for us But i don't think that you can forget some important things in your life depending on what u r trying to FORGET.
710175
All you you have to do is ask for forgiveness and He will throw the sin into the sea of forgetfulness. God does not hold grudges. Once you accepted Jesus it was forgiven.
120948
Realistically, you can't completely forget someone you used to love. At least, I can't. Everyone I've ever loved will always be a part of who I am. They are part of the influences in my life who have made me a better person. Even if they were horrible people, I've become better by the lessons learned. Don't try to forget...just open your heart to yourself and your own strength...and allow your life to "absorb" the hurt. Then the moving on will happen naturally, without the effort...and you will be a finer person for your experiences. (if you choose to be)
366889
When something similar happened to me, I tried to forgive but I could not forget. I ended up having to leave him for my own sanity. That level of betrayal is unforgivable.It sucks but you don't seem to be able to move on with her so maybe you so move without her.
133402
It all depens on what the mistake is. Sometimes, it can be hard to forgive.
466723
One can forgive, but they cannot always forget. It seems like it may is time to move on if you have attempted to address the issue to no avail. \nThere is someone better out there that will treat you as you deserve to be treated.
892121
The hurt and scars will always be there. Forgiveness is a cognitive choice to act differently than you feel. Over time this becomes easier to do. Look at the mennonites who had their children murdered...they forgave even though they were grieving and had deep emotions and hurt. They believe there is no other way to live. Jesus said "forgive them father for they know not what they do" Now this does not mean we put ourselves at risk for further harm...ie we don`t continue to live with a violent partner just because we forgave them...
281510
Literally I think it means to excuse or to pardon ones mistake, but this was no mistake and you have every right to feel the way you do. Some people say they do it because it helps them to accept what happened, releases their anger and allows them to focus on healing. Others I think are more self serving in that they want to seem the better person in appearances and receive the praise that accompanies it all the while still harboring their grief and anger. The thing is that there is no right or wrong way to feel in these situations, but in time you do have to learn how to cope with it. You can't forget about it because it did happen and you are not required to forgive, but you can not let it be all consuming and ruin your happiness and peace of mind. Take Care and Be Happy.
489199
was abused by my father, but was able to forgive him. but if you are unwilling to try the best forgiveness ever given. then you will carry this pain for ever in you and it will suffacate you. please think about finding true forgiveness before this destroys your life. God helped me and my father threw axes, hoes, and tried to run me over. yet hold no grudge.
454880
Forgiveness is tough, but it liberates us in the same way that God's forgiveness frees us. If you never say "I forgive" then you will never let go of the hurt. The past will haunt your present and your future. Forgiving does not erase the hurt, but it will free you from the threat the hurt will stick with you for life. You can pray this prayer "Help me learn from you, dear Jesus, how to forgive, so that I might live fully and freely. Amen"
737138
She can forgive him because he wronged her.  The rest of the world has nothing to "forgive".  The rest of the world only has an opinion! (low as it may be)
1028456
Forgive others many times so you can also be forgiven
154827
You forgive people for your own sake as well as for theirs.  If you hang on to the anger and bitterness you might feel for someone who has wronged you, you are hurting yourself, and probably not hurting or affecting that other person at all.\n\nSo forgive because it is good for you.  Rise above needing the other person to feel remorse.  Forgive for yourself, for your own well being, and we will all be better for it.
928358
You can't . You just tell them how you feel and hope they can forgive you. Move on.* _*