how do you know if marraige is worth saving after infedility?
98412
For them to have gone outside the relationship there had to have been some issues, either with them or between u both. Before anything address those problemz. It also dependz on what u feel for that person and how they feel for u. If there'z luv there and a willingness to work thingz out, then there might be sumthing to save. Also, u have to remember, if u do decide to stay in ur marriage that u have to forgive that person and u have to start clean, u can't use their infidelity as fire power for later spatz....that will eventually cause more problemz. Hope this helpz :-)
1040090
I truly believe that a marriage can be saved from anything. Yes it is hard but years of a marriage is just to important to just throw away. Human Beings are just that we are not perfect and are subject to mistakes. It is how we deal with those mistakes and grow from them that will in the end decide on the chances of the marriage surviving. Just because we falter does not mean that we are not worthy of the love of a spouse. Love consist of many things incluing tolerance so if you keep in mind that this is the man that you love and the man that you chose to marry and he does the same you can keep the lines of communication open and hopefully you can get back what it is that is obviously lacking or missing from the marriage. Just never stop talking and listening and growing.
468279
you definitely should. isn't it time that the both of you made another step toward the ultimate commitment to each other? you have been together this long and have already talked about getting married. i think you should do it. god bless both of you.
701118
My husband was in a firefighter academy when we married. I had just finished my degree and was looking for work teaching preschool. We were planning to wait until he graduated and found work and that way we would have saved up some money. Our schedules were so crazy though, that we really missed time together. Ultimately, we decided that having a big fancy wedding and a nice expensive honeymoon was not what it was all about. We just wanted to be married. We had a beautiful small wedding with just close friends and family. Today is our 9 year anniversary and we are so happy. (Except that I am waiting for him to get out of traffic and get home!) Sometimes you have to weigh what is most important to you. We did not live together before we married either, and the best moment of every day was coming home to be together. Good luck to you!
1034954
It's doesn't matter if you're in school, what matteris how mature you both are.\nMy husband and I were both 19. We were on our own, had stable jobs (I was in the Navy and he was in the Marine Corps), were financially independent, and more mature than most our age. We didn't like going out and partying or drinking (we out grew that stage in high school) and we knew we loved each other. It worked for us but it is harder. Statistics are against us but we know we'll last. \nThere are advantages to waiting but if you really love one another, and you'll willing to deal with extra issues (it is very hard) then get married now.
1181409
You didn't say why you've asked ... \nSo, I'm assuming that you are wondering if you should stay in your marriage ...\nI think you'll probably find the help you need to weigh the pros & cons, in the following articles.  They've helped Lots of  folks (including myself), so I am confident in suggesting them to you:\n\nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/g/2001/1/8/article_01.htm\nCan We Save Our Marriage?;\nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/w/1999/7/15a/article_01.htm\nWholesome Communication - A Key to a Good Marriage;\nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/w/2002/4/15/article_01.htm\nEmpathy--Key To Kindness and Compassion; \nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/w/2005/6/1/article_01.htm\nWhen Marital Disagreements Arise;\nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/w/2003/9/15/article_01.htm\nThe Bible Can Help You to Strengthen Your Marriage;\nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/g/1999/4/22/article_01.htm\nWhen a Mate is Unfaithful :\n...Infidelity - Its Tragic Consequences \n...Is Reconciliation Possible? \n...The Option of Divorce \n...Why Some Stay Together \n...Who Is Responsible? \n...Children Do Not Deserve Divorce \n...Does God Hate All Divorce? ;\nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/g/2004/5/8a/article_01.htm\nWhy View Marriage as Sacred? \n\nOf course you know that Every situation is different.\nNo one can decide for you, either way.  that's a very hard choice to have to make.  But I can say that everyone I know that have considered the Bible-based articles (above) & appleied what they learned, have been satisfied that they did their best ... whatever the outcome has been for them.  Even when they received no cooperation or support from their mate.\nhttps://watch002.securesites.net/contact/submit.htm\nTo Request More Information or a Free Home Bible Study.\nhttp://www.ebible.org/bible/ASV/index.htm\nThe American Standard Version of the Holy Bible
1068702
when you got married, your family became your spouse and any subsequent children.  Time to grow up and prove to yourself and everyone else that you are mature enough to go it alone.  \n\nsince, like you mentioned, the entire cost is going to be out of pocket, is it REALLY worth it?  let the grandparents come to you if they want to see thei rgrandkids so badly.
289426
My dear, if you are having second thoughts then DON'T GET MARRIED!! You don't have to call off the engagement but postpone the wedding. I was married the first time at 25, it lasted 5 years and ended painfully. I am now 32, remarried with a son. I am more mature, responsible, and ready for the committment. It is a life altering change and the "fun" you feel when getting engaged and having a big wedding, etc goes away once reality hits and bills start coming, kids, real life!! Marriage is a wonderful thing...when you are ready for it! Good Luck!!
39317
HOPEFULLY I WILL. WHILE MY 1ST MARRAIGE WAS A DISMAL FAILURE (MOSTLY BECAUSE OF MYSELF), I MISS THE BOND AND THE FEELINGS INVOLVED IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP. HOPEFULLY, I HAVE LEARNED SOME LESSONS THAT I SHOULD HAVE LEARNED LONG AGO.
1143177
Well girl if you're happy now that's what counts most. In the real world after most marriages there is a lull that is sure to happen. The most important thing for you to remember is to remain best friends and always keep that door open for communication. You may very well have a bright and happy future.
141527
Marriage isn't going to be a magic carpet ride. Wait on the vows. You are both too young. Maintain the relationship, pursue your goals, education whatnot,maybe even live together in a couple of years unless that goes against your beliefs. There is no rush. Besides somewhere between your middle twenties and early thirties your both going to change how you view things, trust me on this. It is better to wait and see if you are still compatible in several years rather than go through the heartbreak of a divorce and possibly have young children that would be dissappointed. It may in the end work out. I know of a couple that has been together since their preteens, now in thier fifties, and still happy. Believe it, it's true! But they only got married after they attended college and secured their positions in the work force.
338351
Dude, a year is a decent time to get to know your future wife - (you know that new car smell, that's what it is now) \nthe worst mistake lot of couples make is not cohabiting - that's when you find out for certain if you can exist and live peacefully under one roof.\n\nTake your time do not let anyone rush you into setting the date - have certain priorities and work things out with your woman on serious issues - like housing, investing, having children - marriage is like getting into a business (the love is never eternal) you want to keep your store open for a long time without filing for bankruptcy - plan.\n\nWhen the new car smell dies - decide whether to trade or you gonna maintain it.
919871
your heart will tell you when it's right...but then definaltey marraige!
28120
YES, YES, YES!! It is more than worth the wait. It's better to wait, than not to wait and regret it. What you have is very precious. You can only give it away once. Let it be to your husband. He will appreciate that you guarded something just for him. It's the most loving thing you can do for your future. There's just so many reasons to guard what you have. Many will tell you it's no big deal...because they already gave theirs away. It IS a big deal. Take it from one who gave it away at 18 and regretted it very much later. Even though my hubby forgave me for the loose life I had led before we got married, I still have all those memories of wasting myself on jerks and idiots. All they wanted was a good time. All I wanted was someone to love me. The guy I married? He's the only one who didn't want to use me like that. He wanted more than a one night stand. Don't think that passing up those guys was a mistake, especially if they didn't want to get to know you as a person without getting the perks first. You just continue guarding what you have. I'm sure there's a guy out there who will appreciate it very much...with a wedding ring. <*)))><
794124
Marraige is what you make of it. Committment from both people is required to make it work. You should be allowed to do anything you want (within reason) once you get married.  Try not to have children until after you are 28, or they will be born ugly.
768182
Theres only one way 2 find out... dont make any major commitements  (kids/marriage) for the moment.. if its meant 2 b its meant 2 b u may get hurt in the end but you'll be stronger & wiser & u wont spend the rest of ur life wondering wat if
139571
Yes, you should wait until you are married.