Am i wasting my time.hoping things would change or should i leave him.?
102268
You guys are married. TALK to him and find out what he thinks because they are really important to you. If there are disagreements, then you have to decide whether those disagreements are something that you can put up with and is your love for him and all his other good qualities makes up for it or not.\n\nIn response to your Additional Details:\nThis is going to sound a little strange but if you can't bring yourself to do what you want to do. That's okay. It actually is. And I am not being sarcastic here. What I am saying is, go with the flow. Sit on your unhappiness and frustration and let it simmer. One day down the road, when you have had enough and can't take it anymore, you will know the time to act, when you will have no hesitation, and no regret (well maybe the regret of not doing anything sooner, but better late than never)\n\nAnother thing, if he lets himself slide and the romance is gone, do you think he still loves you as much as he did before you get married? Some signs to take note.
227257
I think you are doing the right thing and just to let you know it will end soon. If you were to back off now that would defeat your whole purpose and have wasted yours and his time. I know you did not want to hear this but, there is always a but isnt there? But If you cant see him changing or being flexible enough on this subject then you may have to let him go, if you fold and let the relationship go back to what is was it will be worse than it was before. I would hang in there, but not for too long.
198528
Ask him, point plank, what his intentions are. Perhaps it's time to find out what kind of future your relationship has. Be very clear about what you want and expect from him.
1178340
Well, something has changed. I was in a crazy horrible relationship for way too long, let me help you out. First, have you tried talking to him about this?  Regardless....No one and I mean no one has the right to make you feel second class. No matter how long you have been together. It is sad and scarey when things start going down hill after years together but just because you have invested time is no reason to stay and find out if he is really going to hit you. Love doesn't behave this way. My guess is that he is doing something wrong and all that hiding is making him guilty and he is projecting that onto you. It is a pretty standard jackass tactic. You are better than that.....I wish you the best in making a decision that is safe and fulfilling for you. We only get one life.
643675
Stay with him.  Give him  some time, if in 6 months, you still feel this way, then leave him.
415518
YOU NEED TO LEAVE ASAP, HE IS FULL OF CRAP.  IT MAY HAVE STARTED OUT AS INNOCENT TALK BUT YOU CAN ALMOST BET THAT HE HAS GONE FARTHER WITH IT.  GOOD LUCK
80186
Just let him go. You just waste you time waiting for something not available. You deserve the best. Explore your enviroment and you will find your next better perfect match. Move on !!!
731699
Definitely this relationship can be saved if both of you are determined.. But one thing is for sure that he has lost your faith and he will have to regain it and it takes some time.. In the meantime you should change your focus from the past happenings and forgive him and look at future..BEST LUCK... HAVE FAITH...
255300
Give him a chance to change on his own, don't push him or you might lose him.  If he is really worth the effort, take your time and don't put too much pressure on him.  It must be his decision to change, or it will not work.
918770
Do yourself a favor and stop the relationship immediately. If he hasn't changed his ways in the last 7 years, he isn't going to start now.  You cannot change people, they have to want to be different, and they have to want to make things better for themselves.  What is it about him that makes you want to stay with him?  And be HONEST with yourself.  Is it merely because you've been with him so long it's comfortable?  I hate to be this blunt, but you need to break this one off or you will just be very unhappy as a married woman, and I can almost guarantee you will end up a divorce statistic.
328979
For your sake and that of your children, move on. He obviously likes having the two relationships and that is not likely to change. The sooner you leave the sooner you and your children will heal. With all the lies this man has spun its amazing either of you are still with him. He has proven he has no intention of leaving. Don't waste more time on a relationship with no future. Find yourself a respectable man and live a happier life.
650990
It will go on for as long as you allow it.  He obviously has intimacy issues and since it's unlikely that he'll change, it's up to you to decide if you want to put up with it.  Tell him that if he leaves again not to bother coming back.
868131
Honey - you said it all already - you knew he wasnt right for you.  Sounds like you are just lonely now and your current relationship might not be the right one for you as a marriage.  Its too late now, and no matter how much you might want to - you cant go back in time and change things.  And truthfully, you probably really wouldnt want to.  Whatever made you break up with him, it would have gotten worse.  Chin up dear girl, plenty of fish in the sea :)
343271
Don't wait around.  Take charge yourself. He may not be thinking along the same wavelengths as you.  I respect someone who can be direct.
951483
get out as soon as you can. HE WILL NOT CHANGE., even if he says he will. i know nobodys advice will chnage what your mid is set on, but if you plan on staying in this relationship, it is your fear of him talking, not your love. get away from him and stick to your story about the slap. anything to stay away from him...
632383
My advice is, not to push the issue. He has said he needs time, and I know that's frustrating, but you have to give him time....or move on!
823804
dump him - he is with you because he is in a routine and doesnt want to be by himself.  he is being really selfish.