How can I stop my husband from getting deployed?
101739
Sorry.  There's nothing you can do...just remember that your husband has made a commitment to his country.  Remember that what he's doing, he's doing for the good of you, your unborn child, and the entire nation.  \n\nHe chose to serve his country - be proud that he has the courage to do so, and pray for his safety.  \n\nThat's all you CAN do.
1121078
My hubby was deployed for a year and I know how hard it is.  What got me through it was getting a full time job that allowed me to take his phone calls during work hours, and sending alot of email and packages.  Just keep in mind that he will come home safely and make sure you have a good support group at home for you.  If you stay strong and supportive it will help him more than you will ever know.  Even though you aren't married you can also call the FRG (Family Readiness Group) that will be set up.  Also if at all possible try and go to see him off.  It'll be good for you to meet some of the women in the FRG and you might get to know a few you really connect with.  If you want to talk or have any questions feel free to email me and I will try to help.\nAlso, from being a military spouse for 4 years, don't worry about the deployment thing until he actually has the orders.  In the military, alot of rumors are spread around (my husband was originally suppose to go a year before he was actually deployed) so don't worry until he has the orders.  Hope this helps.
850032
How long is he going to be stationed there?\nCan you go with him? It is in the States afterall.\nThis happens to alot of married Military.\nsome stay home because they don't want to move and they know that their spouse will be back in a year. but if it is for a longer period of time and you own a home you could rent it out and then rent a place where he is.\nIs moving out of the Question?\n\nGood Luck to you, i hope your dilemma gets resolved.
1149120
As a marine wife and someone who has been affiliated with the military all her life (Navy brat and former Navy sailor), you have to be outgoing and opinionated!  You can't have him telling you what you think and how to do things.  Not only is that chauvinistic but what happens when he's on a 14 month deployment and  you haven't talked to him in a week, if you don't have opinions on how to take care of your family or home, you're screwed.  You also need to be outgoing to make friends.  Marines are gone alot and we need a support system for those times.  If he's looking for some weak-willed yes-girl, then forget him.
566469
Be supportive and understanding. He's not on a vacation. Patience is key and there will be times you'll want to speak with him and maybe he won't be able to give you the time you desire.Make what time you do have to speak with him quality time and don't expect quantity time then when you get it, it's a pleasant suprise.Try not to worry him over things he can't control while away. Handle as much as possible on your own. Being with someone in the military is different than other relationships. You play a very important role. You hold down the fort while he has to be gone...I wish you both the best...
817125
you need to calm youself first, and maybe even take notes on what exactly you want to say and then talk to him yourself.  you absolutely do not have to take him back - he lied to you and cheated on you.  trust is what relationships are built upon and he just did the two worst things to break that trust.  \n\nhe cannot just leave the navy either - he has a contract with them and they can put him in military jail if he goes AWOL (absent without leave).  he has to finish out his contract before he can leave, so that should give him time to straighten himself out.\n\nyou do not need to cowtow to his sister.  she is concerned for her brother, and that is very nice of her - but it is not your responsibility to keep him in the navy.  he took all responsibility for his welfare away from you when he cheated on you.  now it is up to you whether or not to forgive (you will never forget).\n\nmy neighbor has been married for 13 years and her husband cheated on her when they were first married.  they do have a loving relationship, and as much as she protests that she trusts him - by the things she says i know she does not... at least 12 years later.\ni could never live that way - i told my husband (who joined the navy after we had been together for about 3 years and is now in the army) when we first started dating that there were 2 things he could do and no matter what i would leave him - cheat on me or raise his hand to me.  \nyou need to do what is best for you - he is an adult, he can do what is best for himself.\n\nwow, after reading some of the other responses - please do not think that all men are like this, and do not think that all men in the military cheat on their wives - this is not true.  it is also not an accepted behavior in the military anymore - it may have been years ago, but no longer.  \ndo not let him turn you bitter - you are too young to live your life bitter and angry at all men because of 1 man.
105297
there's nothing you can do about it.Your husband needs to disguss it with them since it's his family,and tell them nicely to knock it off.
947147
Have his beach det admin office send you a copy of his deployment orders. This may be a bit difficult if you don't have a power of attorney from him though.
972203
Check with the probation officer.  \n\nYou do know that anything you do can get your military boyfriend in trouble right?
1015068
As a soldier, I am getting sick of not seeing my spouse. We have been seperated for 14 months. We both serve - him in Afghanistan and myself to Iraq. That being said, being in Iraq and seeing it first hand, I know that we cannot pull troops out of Iraq until stability is reached and the Iraqi government can sustain themselves. Unfortunately this will take years.
1006254
I'd really discourage you moving just to be near him. As you said, he'll likely be deployed soon and then you'd be left there by yourself. Since you aren't married you would have limited support and access to base resources. If it is meant to be, your relationship will survive this. If not...at least you will be moving forward in your career.\n\nGood luck.
603941
No, it certainly isn't enough to keep a relationship going. You have to have lots of patience and be able to communicate. Communicating certainly is tough right now and that's where the patience comes in. (Patience is also absolutely necessary when it comes to stubborn people as well!) Plus everything going on around us is bringing a lot of confusing feelings into play right now. That's not helping the situation and deployment just complicates matters. You guys are the only ones who will know if you can get through these tough times, but he mostly needs your support right now. He's physically in a world far far away from the life he's used to... and mentally, who knows where?
679432
I served a tour in Iraq.\n\nFirst of all you need to stop watching the TV news.  They are not trying to give you accurate information - instead they are trying to drive up ratings by exaggerating the dangers.\n\nKeep in touch with him.  Emails, letters and care packages will really make his day.  I do not know if satellite internet is available over there (I had it in Iraq).  If it is then you should be able to talk to him using Yahoo video chat.\n\nKeep yourself busy.  Get involved with your units family support group.  If your units support group is nothing more than a gossip club then find some other spouses who want to do the support things and form your own mini-support group.  \n\nBe proud of your husband and of yourself.  Changing the world for the better is a hard job - but years form now you will be able to state that you 'did your part.'
494744
Why would he want to cheat the system?\n\nThat would be wrong, let him do his time like everyone else does. When he signed up, he knew deployment was a possibility. Support him and be proud of him because he is doing what he promised he would.\n\nIf he stays there for a year, he would be able to come home for 15 days without counting travel time.\nOnly way he would get to come early would be after an injury that would prevent him from doing his job (loss of a limb, trigger finger, mental problems, etc) and trust me, you don't want that.\n\nWish the best for him. I was there for a year too, trust  me it is not that bad.
705432
Being a military wife, yes, it's hard when my husband is deployed for long periods but I have gotten used to it.  I have my own job, activities and friends to bide my time with while he is away.  I knew what I was getting into when we got married and I'm sticking with it.
1013546
expect the worst, hope for the best! Military is both physically and mentally exhasting. Be supportive and help your guy out when you can, is the best you can do. And be strong, they teach there men to marry a strong women, cuz if your not strong you won't last. Tell him you love him and show it, it will help him get though!
379805
I wish you the best.  I don't think they will make him. I know the last deployment that i went on we had a guy that had 2 kids with minor disabilities and he was told that he could have gotten out of the deployment because of it.  His kids are able to go to a normal but do have some problems.  The fact that your husband is working full time and going to school full time might show that he dose not need to be at home so that might be a problem.  You might what to talk to your congressmen about it they can be a big help call his office.  I don't think your husband should be excused but i do understand what you are going though.  I wish you the best