My grandfather is dying. How can I comfort my mother?
117397
Mom, he is going to be fine. He is going to be with God and all of his pain and suffering will be gone. He won't hurt anymore. I know that it is hard to deal with; It hurts me, too. But we have to be strong and leave it all in God's hands. Grandaddy will be overjoyed to see God and we should rejoice with him. Lets pray for him because I know that is what he would want.
1072709
My Grandma passed away 6 yrs ago on the 6th of July.......her Bday is June 30th......every yr since she has left.....I go to her gravesite....bring her fresh flowers & just sit for an hr or so....although some people would say I am bonkers.....I talk....I tell her everything....even though I know she is with me on a daily basis....& sees all that is going on....I still do this....it makes me feel like she is really there.....even though I walk away crying...& missing her even more....I know that it something we enjoyed together.....my Grandma was a VERY special woman....I miss her everyday & sometimes just break down & cry whenever I think of her.....I just thank god she was able to meet my daughter before she went....my son was 2 & my daughter was 1 when it happened.....Honey, I know it is hard when it is a Parent.....she was like a mom to me.....just go spend some time with him....pray & remember every good time....even remember the bad times.....just celebrate him.....GOD BLESS YOU in your time of need....
503339
my grandfather was the kindest sweetest man alive. he died 16 yrs ago and there will never be a man that will replce him. when i do bad i think hes turning in his grave and i feel horrible. my grandma is 92 and shes still as spunky as they come and shes a trip. she whacked my son with her puse recently!! love them both but gramps took us fishing gram took us shopping
1130028
First, please accept my sincere condolences.   I lost my dad the same way about 10 years ago.  I'm going to be brutally honest with you because you need to know and knowing what is coming will make it easier for you to deal with.  Her lungs will fill with fluid.  They may try a couple of times to drain them but, eventually, they will advise that treatment is no longer effective.  They will keep her heavily medicated with pain killers, usually morphine.  Morphine effects different people in different ways.  Some sleep, some hallucinate.  Be prepared.  At the end, she will lapse into unconsciousness.  Her breathing will become more and more labored and, eventually, it will just stop.  \n\nBe there with her as long as she is conscious.  Let her tell you how much she loves you, even though you already know that.  She needs to say goodbye.  In that last vigil, hold her hand.  She'll know you're there to ease her passing.\n\nGod bless you and give you peace.
985398
grieving parent......
590598
wait on her hand and foot, let her know you love her every day you dont know   what youve got untill shes not there no more i took care of my mother from the 1st time she got sick untill october 8th the night she died and im still not over her i feel so lost and alone tell her everyday you love her
997441
everyone deals with loss in different ways. what works for me may not work for you. just go somewhere so you can be alone and cry all you want. talk to your mother and tell her how you feel.
579785
Go see a lawyer IN THE SAME STATE AS YOUR FATHER and explain this situation.  Then hang around your father like a tick on a cold day until he signs a will.\n\nThis is the only good way to protect your mother from poverty or delayed property transfers while she is grieving.  All this should be settled now, in advance, based on the blessing of your father knowing he's going to die as well as about WHEN that's going to happen.\n\nYour mother's grief will be ENORMOUSLY AGGRAVATED if her husband dies without a will ("intestate" is the word for that).
419950
I'm so sorry for your loss. Your mother must have loved your father very much and we can only imagine the pain that she's feeling right now. If you want to help her, be there for her, let her cry, let her be depressed, let her talk about your father or not. Four months isn't that long of a time frame to move past the grief of losing your best friend and life partner, so first and foremost, give her the time, space and permission to grieve the way she needs to grieve. Remember, she's not only grieving the loss of her husband, she's grieving the loss of her entire way of life...it's a difficult adjustment.\n\nAt the same time, encourage her to make small steps toward a 'normal' life again (although, to her, life will never be 'normal' as she knew it again). Take her out to lunch, to a movie, shopping or just for a cup of coffee. Invite her to your house for dinner, if you have children, bring them around. Maybe take a class together at your local community center. All of these things will remind her that there is still life all around her. \n\nIf you're concerned that her depression goes beyond what would conceivably be considered normal for intense grief, then encourage her to speak to a therapist about it. I know you said she would never consider medication, but maybe she doesn't need it. Maybe she just needs someone to talk to, someone who can give her tools to cope with her pain and grief. Another option would be checking into grief support groups in her area. These groups are a great source of comfort and support...she will be surrounded by people who understand the intensity of the pain that she's feeling right now and will have the support of those who have worked their way through it so that she can see that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. \n\nFunny thing about grieving...we all do it differently, yet no one does it wrong.
636316
I say that you should try to sort of comfort him and lay off of him alittle at the same time. My mom was really sensitive when my grandma died, and she would get upset about the stupidest little things. So my dad,brother and I would all just, you know, hug her and be extra nice to her, but not dissagree or argue or anything like that.Her "depressing stage" went away in acouple of weeks.Well, best of luck to you and your boyfriend.
435484
I totally understand what you are asking.  My grandfather spent nearly 10 years caring and loving my grandmother who had Alzheimers.  She passed away, and he got remarried less than 1 year later.  I think you need to look at her from her side.  She obviously loved your father dearly, but when you care for someone that long and there really isn't a whole lot going on between them because the other is sick, it's almost as if the relationship was over a long time before they actually passed away.  It sounds bad, and I don't mean it to, but give your mom the benefit of the doubt.  I'm sure she isn't trying to disrespect anyone.  Good luck.
960803
Absolutely not.  It is selfish of her to even ask.  Especially with your mother recently widowed.  Making sure you mother is OK through the holidays should be priority; and she should understand that.  I know that the holidays can be the most trying for someone right after they have lost a loved one.  Hold your ground.  Stay where you belong.  I am sure she will get over it.  Good luck and happy holidays!!
257887
I'm sorry your uncle died.  Your mom is probably very sad so please be nice to her.
801701
Sorry for your loss! It's hard to decide what is good enough for a special family member during times such as these. I didn't write a obituary but I read to "To Where You Are" by Josh Groban at my mother's memorial service. Very beautiful!
204525
It is a natural as birth, I my father died two years ago. He had a maintainable decease Ulcerative colitis. But at 72 he was tired of living. He felt he had done what he was put here to do and there was no talking him out of it. They put him on painkillers and sent him home. He died six months later. It's tempting to say "lost", but this isn't the case in reality. Those who pass over are ever present in our lives. At times you will even hear them speak when you are having troubles. Right now your mother in law is in a safe place and at peace. There is no time, no pain, there is no fear or suffering. Better by far than the place where we live today. If you look ahead I know it sounds far fetched, but you will see her again soon. Time isn't what you think it is.. So waste non of it. 20 years from now this will make even more sense.
462934
I am sorry to hear about your loss. My grandmother died last year.  You need time to heal, especially since she was close to you.  Talk to friends and family...I am sure they will help.  Do hobbies you love..like sports, collecting, and just going out with friends..it will help you cope.
419998
I'm sorry about your loss. I lost my mother 2 1/2 months ago and will soon be going through a first mother's day without her. Because Mom was such a jokester and loved life to the fullest, when our spirits droop and tears threaten us, we share memories of something she did or said that made us laugh at the time. It's what she'd want to see within the family.. not alot of depressed and unhappy loved ones mourning her loss. It's really ok to laugh and smile.. dont spend too much time grieving over her loss, rejoice that you were blessed enough to know her as long as you did. Get the picture albums out and remember those things that made you smile and laugh. It's a great connection and keeps the memories strong of the woman you both loved so dearly.