My husband always hot tempered?
104916
Think about these questions and their answers:\nAre you both in financial trouble?  Stress from finances can make anyone hot tempered and cause strain on marriages.  Work out a budget to get back on track, cut back on spending on unneeded items.  \n  \nIs he having trouble at work?  Encourage him to talk about it if so, to get it off of his chest.  \n\nDoes he have any hobbies, things he likes to do?  If so, encourage him to do them to help relax.  \n\nDoes he workout?  I know for me, going and doing a good workout or hitting the punching bag for a while will get rid of those feelings when I am angry.\n\nIs he insecure about something?  Does he think he is too short, too fat, too thin, etc...?  Maybe he is hot-tempered because of this.  Try to encourage him and point out his good traits.  \n\nDo you take care of him at home (sexually)?  This caused a lot of problems in my marriage when we wouldn't have sex or cuddle for months at a time.  Husbands are much happier when they are satisfied sexually.  \n\nIf none of these items apply or can help, he may just have psychological problems and should be encouraged to see a therapist or do marriage counseling to talk it out in a safe, neutral environment.  \n\nGood luck!
1049554
Yeah! These people are aTTACKers, aren't they...but helpful, too. Don't delete your question because I'ma watchin' it, girlfriend!\nWell, I say if he has the NERVE to check you on YOUR DAILY WORK, then you can get that same nerve.  \n\nThat is the trade-off, right.  And he wouldn't want to switch with you.  Tell him on a Saturday morning or a day off to track what the heck he does all day! Projects take longer than men think.  I like to get everything done in the 1st two hours of of the morning hustlin. Then, no matter what I do it's just done and the happy husbands off\nmy friggin' back.  \n\nTell him if you spent as much time cleaning up after HIM as you \ndid on the other household, necessary daily chores, he'd HAVE\nthe neat, sparkly perfect home he desired.  He'll get mad, that's just that tender little species of fragility and gentleness called\nTHE MALE EGO.\n\nTo those people who are working do NOT assume SAHM is\na dream job.  Its not for lazy bums.  Not the hardest work, \nbut important and challenging, more than you'd think.
1036579
Sadly there is not much you can do to cool him down or even prevent an episode of rage in him.  If you want to cope so you don't end up terminating the relationship all you have to do is when you sense his temper tantrums coming, leave immediately if possible.  Simply refuse to be around him because you know that his negative attitude will affect you...I'm sure it always does.  And if his temper is as quick as you say, then you may just be running away from him more than you stay around him, but that is the only thing that can keep you safe from his poison.
347850
i myself are in a relationship for more than a year and things tend to get a little aggrivated lately.  The best adivice i can give you is to just take things as they come and just talk everything over with your man that comes up.  If you argue about things, thats ok. don't think it is your fault at all. if your mad, its obviously him thats doing something to make you mad.  just tell him whats bothering you
459359
no its not a bad thing to make him cry that means hes human and is not a hard core asshole. maybe it was that you were quiet and your usually not that shocked him or it was that you told him that he has you forever and always men are so hard to read i have been married for 9 years and i can honestly say he says that i am ignoring him but i not his thing is he thinks i am pissed off all the time and i'm not i have 3 kids so when they go to bed i am done talking. i think your ok and just be open and honest with him and you guys should be fine
828805
Well, you've got to do what you've got to do, but be prepared to alienate (at least) your brother-in-law and his wife.  It sounds like he is very self centered and, I would bet, the boss in his family (strong type A personality).  I don't know where it will stop, but there will be a lot of really stinky stuff floating around-and may never dissipate.  A person with his personality will definitely blame you for the problems that arise.  From what you have said he thinks his time is far more valuable than others and, therefore, will not understand your anger.
1059849
i know how you feel.  except mine is a 3 year old tantrum king!  spouse is deployed and we're far from home so i feel your pain...almost like being a single parent.  i enrolled him in a day program.  i feel like such a better parent when i see him.  i have a chance to miss him.  he is soooo feisty and just an all around boy he drives me nuts so having him burn his energy for 4 hours a day and then coming home...he's nice and relaxed and doesn't fight me when it's bed time.   also, you probably heard the saying.....terrible 2's, horrible 3's......lol
696347
Ok first off it doesn't matter WHAT he has, he needs to talk to a psych as he's obviously have issues. No one on this board can tell you want he has. Especially because mood swings and frenzied activity can be symptoms of any number of disorders and conditions. I'd also suggest you offer him an ultimatum. I have a friend whose husband told her if she didn't see a psych he'd divorce her. She had thrown a family size can of creamed corn at his head, amongst other things. She saw a psych, got the appropriate meds, and they now live happily ever after like normal people. You don't necessarily need to move out...just make it clear that his behavior isn't to continue and he's GOT to see a psych.
1067329
Everyone goes through mood swings.  Guys aren't the only ones who are rude and mean - women do it too.  The key is communication between eachother so you know how eachother is feeling.  If your husband is just mean and grumpy for no good reason he might be dealing with some things inside of him that he isn't willing to share with you.  Either way, if it bothers you and you can't talk it out - there is nothing wrong with getting into marriage counseling.
422707
I am also a "passive" person, but not quite to the extent your husband is.  Have you ever considered the fact that your husband grew up in chaos, and didn't have a male figure around for him to learn from?  Don't know his background, but his "symptoms" sound a lot like the way I grew up.  If it seems he "likes" chaos it could be because he doesn't know how to resolve chaos.  And as far as him "blaming you", have you ever considered that he is feeling pretty crappy cause you can handle things better than him? If you truly love him, be kind and patient and understanding.  Help him learn that you can "fix" chaos.  If you feel like he can walk away from the marriage without ever turning back, have you ever considered that that exact thing may have happened to him?  Try turning it around and not being so dominant yourself.  Turn to him and let him know you value his ideas, thoughts and decisions, and you NEED him in everyday life and decisions. If he makes a "wrong decision" but it isn't hurtful, life threatening, or irreversible, go with the flow and let him learn from mistakes, knowing you will stand behind him no matter what.
647674
Settling is wrong, and if thats what this feels like MOST OF THE TIME, then think about whether or not someone else could make you as happy as your boyfriened does when he isn't ticking you off. Sometimes someone annoys you or makes you sad sometimes, but you still love them more than anyone else in the world, and you're still happy with them most of the time. \n\nThen, realize that some males think that arguing/debating is a way to keep things fiery. I've had to explain to my husband that I hate fighting of any kind because I grew up in a very explosive household, and that sometimes the smallest disagreement will make me incredibly nervous and sad. He responds that if I have a different opinion, he wants me to express it. Neither of us are wrong, there just has to be a compromise.\n\nI suggest you tell him that if he wants to debate with you, fine - but it MUST NOT become personal - at all. Also, tell him that if he doesn't respect your opinion or think its "good enough" then he shouldn't bother arguing with you about that particular subject. You two can debate - but not argue. He needs to understand the difference, and understand why it matters to you. Tell him you want most of all to get along with him and make him happy and be happy, and that constantly expressing your different opinions makes that very difficult to achieve.\n\nGive him time. Lots of it. \n\nI hope I helped.
569515
Forget subtlety.  Tell him outright you don't like it and if it happens again you will tell your husband.  He doesn't sound like much of a friend to your husband, and hubby would probably be better off without this jerk for a friend.\n\nProtect your marriage, protect eachother.
900734
can't blame you for getting frustrated...what you need is a break. meaning...go somewhere else with your husband, take a trip to a new place or a place where you've been to before and had a great time...\nsometimes it takes much more than "holding it" to ignite things... a change of environment once in a while is good for both of you.\ni think your husband feels stressed out, or something is really troubling him and doesnt want to tell you what...but that's another story...\n\nand about your question if its normal for him to not want to have sex, my answer would be yes. My husband is like that..sometimes...esp when he's tired, i realized my energy level is higher than his so i try my best to meet halfway...husbands are lazy when they are tired and sleepy even if as you put it...you are a hottie.\n\nGood luck to you and your hubby...
1019504
I think you and hubby need to have an open, honest heart to heart. When he complains about your "cool" behavior tell him, it's easier for you to be more attentive and affectionate when he is treating you with the same loving care. It is possible that he has some under lying problems that he needs to talk about, there may be some changes that he is looking for in the relationship....Just go to him and listen with an open mind. Find out what both of you are missing from the relationship, and make good effort to be sure to do those things...spend some one on one time with each other, doing things you both enjoy, maybe even discover a new hobby together....enjoy loving each other again. We all hit rough patches in our marriages, we just have to work through them.\nGood Luck....you can email me if you need someone to talk to .\n\n\n**** wanted to add after seeing all the cheating answers that yes, they might be a possibility, but I think there would be other signs if that were going on....and This type of behavior doesn't always equal cheating!! Like I said he might just want a little change in the relatioship, or have other problems he needs to work out or talk about.  **** DON'T JUMP TO ANY CONCLUSIONS that could make matters worse, but keep your eyes open. ****
638099
Some jitters and questioning are normal and I do not think you are over the top on that. There are things you may want to change about yourself by not nagging as much. All men are moody and only you know if you will be happier with him. The mother in law issue could bring real unhappiness and she is way over the top. I have to ask myself why he would tolerate her screaming at you. You are marrying a family as well as your husband.
745508
follow your heart but communcate that with your husband...and for god sake stop worrying about this stuff and consummate the marriage..its been long enough and im sure hes irritated.
612557
sweetie. you need to have a talk with him. don't continue to be unhappy. it's not healthy. ask him what are his plans as far as the marriage is concerned. hope things get better for you.