How does one deal with a spouse suffering from bi-polar mood disorder?
111040
I have Bipolar Disorder, ADHD, as well as HFA; higher-functioning Autism. \n\nHere are some pointers:\n\n* Show him/her you love them regardless.\n* Listen to him/her, when s/he feels in a low. Support him/her, tell him/her you love them, hug them, cuddle them.\n* Find a good counselor/psychiatrist for the individual's treatment.\n* Help monitor the person's medications. (if needed).\n    Are the medicines helping? If not--recommendations; talk to therapist, counselor, psychiatrist, etc.\n* Find alternatives to self injury--if s/he is a self injurer. \n* During a manic episode (all time natural high), help the person calm down, in order to go to sleep. Cuddle them, hug them, tell them you love them, and do some things to help them get their energy out--such as jogging, running, exercising, so they can relax and rest/go to sleep. \n* Monitor the person while on meds--are they staying up all night? If so, they may be having a manic episode. \n   Is the person moody with you/others? More argumentative? Sad? Depressed? Feelings of misunderstood, hopeless, worthless, and suicidal tendencies? More agitated? Irritated? Is s/he having racing toughts?? -- again, may be manic episodes... --is s/he talking in circles or riddles--cannot slow down? Seems hyper?? -- again, may be manic. \n\nHope this advice helps. If you have any questions, feel free to ask me. Email me anytime at Luvs2Write16@aol.com.\n\nTake care,\n\nMichelle
299922
be there for her. be patient. we can't help our mood swings, we just need support. she doesn't really hate you.
415679
Well, you have picked a rough road but I think you can do it with support and patience as well as consistency.  Truly the best thing you can do is take care of you, bipolar disorder affects loved ones even harder and I believe you need to find a support group, or even better a church you can get involved with for the help and love you need =)  Praying for you and your girlfriend =)
632844
You need to talk to him.  Let him know how you're feeling.  Sometimes our spouses don't read our minds even when we think they should.  It doesn't make them insensitive just not perfect.  He may not realize your depression or the level of it.  If you're able to tell us you're depressed then TELL HIM.  Men and women have a different makeup and we don't understand each other most of the time.  Sometimes communication helps in understanding.  Just try to tell him how you're feeling.  ((((HUGS))))  Sorry for you loss.
1146546
Have you ever heard the phrase "You always hurt the one you love"? I don't think all bipolar people hurt the people they are closest to all the time, but it is always easier to let your worst side out when you're with someone you trust.  I think you should talk to him about checking his medications (if he's already on them.  If he's not, perhaps you could suggest that). \nBipolar disorder is a disease that can be controlled if it is medicated.  Yes, people with bipolar act out of control sometimes, but it should never be an excuse for their actions.  He definitely owes you an apology.  \nYou should talk to him and tell him how you feel.  Maybe that will help prevent such outbreaks in the future.
643164
I was married to a man with bipolar for 12 years. Unfortunately, I had to finally leave him.  It started with figuring it out that he had a problem with alcohol.  I put him through rehab, and when he stopped the alcohol, that is when it became obvious that he was self-medicating to deal with the underlying mental illness.  It started out as depression, then severe depression and then progressed to the point that he could sleep for an entire weekend (other than eating and going to the bathroom). If we would force him to wake up, he would wake up enraged. He would scream, shout, kick in appliances, break things - we would have to call the police. Then he would disappear for hours and come back home like nothing happened. There were also other addictions and behaviors that were present. He would shoplift for no reason, became addicted to porn, chatting in porn chat rooms and eventually meeting up with the women for sex. He couldn't hold a job. He developed a severe dependence on Nyquil.  He had OCD behaviors like ironing his clothes ridiculously (even his shoe laces) and using an entire bar of soap when he showered.  OK, now my situation was one of the worse case scenarios, but just wanted to give you an example.  Bipolars are often really against getting help and taking meds too.  Often times, the meds don't even help much.  After a family intervention where we begged him to get help and he refused, I had to take my daugther and leave. My health was suffering and I would have been driven crazy eventually. It sure can be hard on a spouse. I hope your situation is nowhere near as bad as mine was.
958885
A person with bipolar disorder that is treated is no different from any other person.  A person with untreated bipolar disorder is capable of many extraordinary things - both good and bad.\n\nIn the end, nobody can break up a marriage except the two people in the marriage.
133184
that's a hard one considering how bad off one is during the ups and downs of bi-polar mania! If the person has violent behavior during the upswing you can call North Harris County Psychiatric Center and they will come pick him up. You will have to go down their to fill out forms to state that he is in their involunitarily or he will be considered volunitary and could walk out the next day. The only problem with anything in houston is that all psychiatric centers allow incoming patients to stay no longer than 7-12 days. But, in some cases the patient can stay until he is completely balanced on his new medication and is sleeping and eating properly. my friends cousin was bi-polar and violent and she ended up killing herself last week and she has two kids and a husband so, if your serious about committing this person do it now if you see any suicidual tendecies. I hope i didn't frighten you but, it's better to know than not for his safety. GOOD LUCK!!
468705
I know someone whom I'm sure is bi-polar, one day she's so happy and nice, the next she depressed and nasty. The reason it's so hard to get along with someone like this, is because you don't know which way they'll be on any given day- it's hard to determine how they'll feel and act so you don't know how to act towards them in the first place. The person doesn't even know how she will be on any given day- you really just need to support her and give her space when she needs it. I know sometimes these people feel guilty after they've acted a certain way so just show he love and forgiveness.
27405
All you can do is be there and be supportive to him. I've dealt with this with my husband, and until he admits there is a problem, he won't seek help from a professional. It's a long, hard road to walk, but if you love him as much as I do my husband, you'll be there and listen. Make a suggestion to him that it isn't at all degrading to get help, be on meds to help him feel better. In todays society, a very large percentage of people are being treated for depression, anxiety, and panic disorders. It's normal due to the high stress we encounter every day! I'm not ashamed to admit that I take antidepressants on a daily basis. I feel better today than I have in years! Good luck in whatever you do! Here are a couple of good sites to look at.
840146
Hi\n\nPlease keep these people at a distance. Call your local mental health clinic and hook up with a therapist as soon as possible. People with Bipolar tend to isolate and become emotionally vulnerable. If you are not on meds may I suggest that you discuss this option with your counselor as well? I also have Bipolar and know others who have it. You cannot save the world and you need to find a new set of people who will be supportive of you - support group maybe?
48802
If you have it, stay on your meds.  If your boyfriend has it, you're in for a long, rough road.  I once dated a bi-polar gal.  It was just too much for me.  My life wass hard enough to deal with, without having to deal with her issues, too.
1123431
This is a difficult situation and I can just imagine your anguish.\n\nFirst of all, expect the best but prepare for the worse case scenario.\n\nFrom the hints you've given us about this man, it seems he has had it rough. Probably, at fault for having deceased, divorced or careless parents. I might be mistaken, but his behavior either way, is not normal. Something is defenitely going on.\n\nConsider also, the fact that many men tend to suffer from depression. From the way he is acting I feel tempted to deduct that he has a bout of manic or bipolar depression. You know, one day he is Mr. Perfect an the next day you wonder if its the same man you met the day before. \n\nSo while you figure this puzzle out, try to not depend on him too much, and try to find something else where you can rest your emotions. Having them take a ride with him on tha agressive roller coaster isn't healthy and might ruin your happiness if things do not work out in the end.\n\nLastly, you might want to consider the following ideas:\n\n-As him out on a date, perhaps coffee, and tell him how you fee.\n-Drop a note during lunch time, telling him you know he's had it rough and would like to take him somewhere special where ha can relax and just forget about everything for a day or two.\n-Buy him flowers (If he is this type) most men like it.\n-Give him a pucker up on the cheek next time you see him and tell him you hope all goes well.\n-Offer your shoulder to him when no one else is looking and invite him, or rather, make him cry. Men have a hard time doing this but if you help him confide in you and reassure him its ok to get teary, next time youll be grabbing for is the klenex box.\n\nIf despite your eager attempts to get a hold of this seemingly bipolar prince charming fails. Give it some rest and keep your options open. Perhaps then you might give him the chance to loose you and then see how muvh you truly are worth it, and at the same time, you give yourself a breather and an opportunity to meet a few others.\n\nBest wishes, and you too, cry a little now and then.
273465
Be patient with yourself, join a support group at your church or talk to a family counsellor (with or without your spouse). Be patient with your kids, spend as much quality time with them knowing that they are caught in the middle of an adult issues and are too young to understand the complexity of these issues.  Just go out and have as much fun with them as possible at the park, mall or the children's museum.  Do not neglect your health (ie: overeating-->obese or undereating).  If you're not into the gym go for light walks, and by all means use meditation tapes they really do help.  Give your spouse that space she needs  but keep the channel of communications open.  Be honest with each other and don't try to sweep your marriage issues under the rug or they will never be resolved.  Good Luck.
45490
kytrailman gave some good advice.\nAny relationship is unique.  My wife was diagnosed as being bi-polar over 25 years ago.  We have been together for over 22 years.  Treatment is usually effective, but human support is also helpful.\nI do not know who told you that people with bi-polar condition  can not last in a relationship, but older studies of the condition (manic-depressives) usually listed this as one effect FOR UNTREATED patients.\nIf you love the person and the person is under treatment, then do not worry.  Just read something like the book mentioned above so you know what you are getting into.\nHey, and give kytrailman the points.
327433
severe mood swings, hearing voices, seperation from family and friends, newly created fears of the out side world, fits of rage without reason...  there are many different symptom classified by the bi_polar disorder!  It is a severe depression and you should go to the dr and talk to them honestly letting them know what is going on so you can get the help you or the refferred person needs!! It can be dangerous mentall and even suicidal if not treated in a timely manner!!!!  Good Luck!!!!
878177
People suffering from bi-polar have 2 very different emotions that they exhibit, thus the name bi-polar.\nAt one moment they may be joyously happy and bouncing around the room. The next they will be manicly depressed, and in some cases suicidal.\n\nThe best thing to do if you think someone is bi-polar is take them to a psychiatrist. They can do many personality tests and interviews with the patient to determine their mental health status.\n\nAnother thing to point out, it that they will swear blind they do not have a problem. Don't believe them. If they are very close to you, you will have seen a change in their personality that will indicate something is wrong.\nIf you have to, drag them to the doctor because they do need help!