my husband is not romantic though he is very caring.he is 15 years elder than me?
114995
You can't force someone to be romantic, either they are or they aren't.  Try and communicate your needs to him and he'll try and meet you half way.
276854
As much as you seem to love this man I think you deserve a hell of alot better!  This man does not respect you as a wife or as a person.  He takes your feelings and stomps all over them.  He is being totally immature and sounds like a totally controlling man.  YOU deserve a man who is going to love you,respect your feelings, and wont run out like a spoiled child when u have a disagreement!  Temper Tantrums r for 3 year olds not grown men.  And the fact that he didnt even want to save the marriage and go to counseling says volumes about the kind of man he really is.  LET HIM GO!  Find a real man!  Life is way too short to be spending it in a loveless marriage.  I met my hubby in 10th grade in highschool and we have now been married 22 years!  My husband would never dream of treating me like this!  Cuz he knows Id kick his butt!  smile!  Get rid of him, let him run, let him take the cowards way out.  YOU told him u would file for divorce if he left again- and he left.  THAT alone says he doesnt care about the marriage.  I feel so badly for you, I know this has to be hurting you terribly and wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better for u but unfortunately I cant.  But I do believe in you.  You r a strong woman.  YOU can do this and you will find a man who will truly love you I PROMISE!  Lose this guy and get yourself a real man!  Good luck to u
513911
i don't know if u married him or not but i think u must find one suitable for u , i am single and i Love my life i am not die if i am not have a woman but i don't go love and  married woman older than me by 18 years i think i will be her son yes he can gave u many thing but after little time u will know the fact u need to be with one can understand u u say u not in love with him anymore then what u feel now just emotion because i think u r single and alone if u need anther help contact with me have a nice time and good luck
574077
I think people are misunderstanding what you are trying to say. Perhaps a language barrier yes?\nYour husband is smart, but you are smart also.\nI know you are trying to say you are being a faithful\nwife and you want to be a perfect wife for him. Also you may be trying to say he should not be suspicious because you are trying to be the best wife.\nThose are real feelings you are experiencing.\nA thing called a womens intuition. Sometimes if he is suspicous of you its because he is a suspicous person himself. Your are married only one year to get to know him.\nGoing out 3 years does not give much of a chance to really know a persons habits. Age is another factor too. Let him go his path for now. He is not in the building stage of your relationship. He is not doing things to make you both grow as a couple. He as to value marriage. He has to change his ways now. You have to encourage him to not let it continue to go his separate way. It is not the same path. If you suspect him more you have to say to him not to bring home social disease. Get it out now and begin healing and loving. Ask him why did he marry if he still needs to stray (wonder like a cat).\nYou value marriage and you want it to work out, patience is most likely one answer. Good Luck.
799745
maybe your hubby's just have an immature behavior.. i guess he's a also a loner who has his own world.. many men are like that by the way.
361475
If you 've truely been unhappy for 15 years, I'd say you've been married for 14 years too long.  However, my initial response was that a marriage is very much like a business partnership, but you are right that it also needs love and romance to flurish.  \n\nWhat concerns me is the apparent infatuation with this other guy.  You must have found something appealing about your current husband that you wanted to marry him.  And something worthwhile to stick it out for 15 years, my gosh.  I am concerned that once you leave your husband, which I think you should, the novelty and infatuation with the new guy will wear off.  Living with someone is always much different than "dating" them.  \n\nI think you should leave your current husband only for issues you have with him, not because you think you may have found a better replacement.  It would be really sad to leave a good provider to find out the new guy is not up to par in some bad ways.  Get out of the marriage first, then take the new relationship as it comes.
688770
It depends on your maturity.  There are some women who at 20 have the maturity of a 40-year old.  Do you agree on the same things?  Do you love each other?  Would you mind if people refer to your husband as your father?  Would your children mind if people  refer to their father as their grand-father?  Would you be willing to care for him when you're sixty and he's 80? If you're 20 today and he's 40, it will not show up much, but I guarantee that when you're 60 and he's 80, it's a different story.  Make sure you reflect on all these things before marrying him (not only with your heart but with your brain) and then make a decision which you're sure not to regret in the long run.  Good luck.  \n\nSince I'm a female, I know lots of ladies who are married to men who are 9 or 10 years their senior.  Amazingly, the age gap doesn't seem to take a toll on their marriage and most of them are very happy together.
413886
I understand why he does not want to cuddle and so on. You said that you thought you two were cousins "for the longest time", well just because you find out that you two are not does not make him feel different towards you.....you are still family.
60528
Learn to be patient. If you are not married yet, I would suggest you to leave him. I know it is awful living with an inconsiderate man. But I honor marriage and think people should try their best to stay in their marriage in better or worse. So please learn to accept him the way he is. Anyway, it's your life and your decision. I won't respect you less if you decide to leave him. Wish you the best.
854769
hey,\n\ni'm not entirely sure because i don't know the whole story,  were the two of you showing affection to each other ( kissing,cuddling, that sort of stuff?), if so than maybe yes it was the whole age gap thing, because in reality he is old enough to be you father, but all power to you for dating an older guy, i hope i can still get a girl as young as you when i am that old.\n\nbut i must also err on the side of caution, just think when he is 60/70 you will still be in your prime and also pretty much at the back end of your body clocks prime time. then people will either be thinking he is your father for real or think you are his carer, if he gets ill.\n\nsorry if i sound as though i'm against but i like to try and look at things both ways ( pros and cons)\n\nhope this helps
1180231
They are saying you don`t matter enough to me to be kind and understanding!There is a possibility your husband is mad about something you don`t even know happened and needs to discuss it with you in a reasonable kind fashion.Also at certain ages some men louse sexual drive,he may be embarrassed and is hiding it with avoidance and anger.I would lean towards keeping a close eye on his activities and try to find out what he is so interested in other than his hot wife.There are some real weird people out there and it is amassing how well they can hide there deviant behavior.An acquaintance of mine, husband,liked little girls and left her alone one to many times and she found out.Here is a good rule for married people,if you can`t show your spouse what you are doing on your computer you most likely should`nt be doing it.Get some help ask a counselor in the mental health dept.of a clinic or hospital. Do it,DO IT NOW!
716784
It sounds like your relationship is great but one thing that worried me - you said you were worried his family wouldn't like you - you should meet them first, and make sure he meets yours first.  \n\nWhen I first started reading your post I had my doubts, BUT \nI don't think the age difference matters in your case.  In some it does, but your relationship does seem more mature.  People always think I am too young also.  I'm 19 and getting married next summer too.  I love this man and he is my best friend and my life partner.  We've been together since I was in middle school and we've grown up together and are still growing together.  I think it's amazing to find a love like this when you are so young.  Don't worry about what everyone else thinks - count your blessings that you have something that some people NEVER find.  \n\nJust be sure you have the same goals, and plans for the future.  For example, in a few years you are going to want a son or daughter with him also.  I am sure you love his son like your own but the time will come when it will drive you crazy that he is not your own and you need to make sure he will be willing to have more children.
427462
well, there could have been a compatibility problem; you were probably hostile to his sperms.well, it could be that only his sperms have a problem with your ovary.You could try other sperms;)..\nhere is a story that could probably help your spirits! My grandmom had a cousin who did not even menstruate after the first time.So, after she got married, she went to the doc and got an injection and got pregnant..twice.she lived till 75+.Her children have survived and have had children of their own .This was about more than 60 years ago! with today's medical advances, what cannot be achieved?!If she could get pregnant without even menstruating, why can't you!!!!!!!You just need the right medical advice.\nThere are test-tube babies, adoption and many more other options today.If a man leaves you because you couldn't get pregnant, he is not worth staying with!
1159025
My Hubby of 36 years..........................................
83925
Honey, as long as this guy is nice to you, understands about the difficulties such age differences mean, and is basically a good guy then date him, have fun, but don't let him press you to do things you don't want to. I married a man older then myself and have been very happy. It takes longer for men to mature then women so really he is basically your age right about now. So the real question is do you want to date some one who is the same age as you? lol
223805
Of course not...you think you've been perfect for the last 20 years...and would it be fair for your husband to trade your imperfection for someone who doesn't have them...if you think the grass is greener on the other side...start watering your own lawn more!
905743
I am a strong supporter of tough love but it doesn't seem that your husband would agree with this approach.  You do not state the child's age so it is kind of hard but it sounds like he is in junior school by his actions.  If there is a mentorship program in your area perhaps you can set up one for this boy.  I work with youth in conflict with the law and have seen many of them make remarkable turnarounds after they have reached the age of 18.  As far as you and your husband getting on the same page - this is very important not only for you both but for the child also as he can sense the tensions and differences in your styles.  Sports also sometimes help kids to release some of their pent up energy and if possible you can set him up in one that he is interested in.  Best of luck.