My husband says that he will stop smoking and he keeps lying to me about him not smoking, what should i do?
113775
you are married so i think you musrt be mature enough. there is only one true answer to  this. he doesent want to argue with you.he says he stoped smoking,but he is not strong enough to do it yet.but still,he doesent want to hurt you or he doesent feel goog to admit he is too week and cannot stop so easy. but if you are not repressing him with that,and if you support him and show him you love him no matter if he smoke or not, it will be different. so,show some empathy here.its not easy to stop smoking for some people. you'll see ,he may be stronger when see you wont make a big deal from it
589791
find a different hobbies to do Ive been smoking for 30 yrs and its so hard to stop once you get hooked PLEASE STOP SMOKING try anything that will help the patch there gum anything just stop smoking or you will end up with cancer in the throat or lungs
11895
Two points to this....first, he won't change for you.  He may change eventually but he won't be doing it for you. Second, it's unfair of you to ask him to change. Did he suddenly start drinking and smoking midway through the relationship? Accept him for what he is or if you are unable to do so, move on. And, hon, love has nothing to do with it.
797375
Buy him some sugar free gum and then tell him if he doesn't quit, then he cannot kiss you because his mouth is disgusting when he is chewing tobacco. Good luck!!\n\nChow!!
749694
Tell him you love him and will help him and support him if he choses to stop. Otherwise tell him that it is you or the cigarettes. Remember that a bad habit is more easily broken when it is replaced by a good habit. Good Luck!
718260
Addictions do not just go away.  If your husband refuses to admit that he has an addiction and needs help, he will never change.\n\nI highly suggest that you move out and start considering a formal separation.  If he refuses to listen when you do this, then face reality and look into a divorce.\n\nYou should not have to put up with his problem if he refuses to admit that he has one.  If his drinking is causing problems and he know this but is not willing to do anything about it, then he has made his choice and you lost to the addiction.
510157
You are doing a great thing for yourself and those who love you.  My fiance quit in September.  He was climbing the walls the first couple of months, but it has gotten easier and easier for him.  He hardly ever thinks about it now... He feels better, smells better, can taste his food better, and is saving a lot of money not buying cigarettes.  You can do it!
33677
Wow that is a tough situation to be and I know several in that same boat. Whether it is alcohol or pot or other illegal substances, the decision is only his to stop. The thing to do for yourself, assuming you are not using,is to go to get counseling see if your spouse is willing, though I have heard they very seldom tell the truth about what they do or especially how much. If it is hurting your relationship then maybe it is time to communicate this to him. I wish I could offer more. I feel for you. Good luck
22204
He surely need to quit...as smoking is not only bad for both of you, but it is bad for your children, the example on how a father should behave & many other issue, plus smoking is actually kind of selfish act and costly too!\n\nbut i do really happy you said "We want to have him quit smoking before we get married" i really wish you two will have happy life in future that not included smoking as part of it...so may he sucuess!
808876
She already knows that you support her in not smoking, the only thing that you can do is continue to let her know that her smoking hurts you and that you would support her efforts to quit. Don't berate her, it will only make her resent you. The final decision is hers and hers alone. Many people successfully give up smoking, but it takes tremendous willpower and there are probably even more ex-smokers in the world than smokers.
184718
Try telling him all the complications due to smoking...and to quit smoking one must will power. Maybe try to get the nicitine patch for him and stuff like that...keep working him until he gives it up.
99302
In all honesty, if he planned to stop, i'd tell you to keep it a secret because you could ruin their marriage...but since he's gunna keep doing it, you have to come clean to his wife.  He's being disrespectful to her and he's being an idiot.  If he loved her, he wouldn't need anyone else and he's probably not even worth being with her...tell her the truth and let them sort it out
921431
I would be more concerned about why your Husband told you in the first place, could it not be that your Husband is lying, I am not saying he is, but you have to look at it from both sides, and try to rationalize everything, Men do sometimes lie about this type of thing, to make their partners jealous
587305
It is called irreconcilable differences.  Talk to your doctor about getting help to stop smoking.  It is better for your long term health to stop smoking and keep the wife.
793620
Well, I guess this also depends on how long you were dating before you decieded to tell her. And it also depends on if she had asked you this question before. If you had told her you didn't smoke, and now you are telling her you did, she's going to lose a lot of trust in you. Be sure to tell her you are NEVER going to smoke again and it's something that you learned an important lesson about. Her reaction is a very good reason to not pick up a smoke ever again, and you have to let her know that that is what your intentions are. Let her be mad for a bit, and then try to discuss. If she doesn't want to talk, then you have to decide if maybe she's not the right one for you. Good Luck :-)
425790
The most helpful thing I did was to reprogram my brain.... Instead of saying you are giving up smoking, say "I don't smoke". What you tell your brain, becomes the truth. Sounds funny, but it worked for me. You can also change some of your habits. If you always smoke after a meal then do something else to take it's place. Keep in mind that you are adding years to your life by achieving your goal.
320931
Just quit. My husband quit about a week ago. He just came home from work, said I quit smoking today, and hasn't touched one since. He used Nicorette gum the first couple day, now he chews regular gum. I know it's hard, but if he can do it, so can you. (He's been smoking since he was 14.) Just think how much healthier you will be and in better shape to play with your kids. Plus, you are setting a bad example for your kids by smoking. By having a parent that smokes, they are twice as likely to smoke themselves.