what is a good idea for a date, after my wife and I are trying to overcome her affair?
117478
I would need to know why she had an affair...what did she feel was missing with you and her.  Woman who cheat usually do so because something is missing. If you can fin d that out and correct it it wsill be easier for her not to cheat again....then for that special date...depending on what you find out...add whatever it is to the date and keep doing it.
736445
Take her out and make a big todo about it. Tell her how awesome she is.\n\nSay you have a suprise and take her somewhere special...like for a glass of wine at a park at night. Watch the stars and surroundings and tell then pop the question. It is quite and private and you just have yourselves together. Plus, she will be all happy abou it. Also, if you can, get a very sexy blanket and some throws for you to sit on with her. Have some candles as well...if you can have a buddy set this up for you with petals leading to the spot. Have him do this within a few minutes of your planned arrival and have him/her watching in the woods until you come...then he scoot out...just to make sure someone doesn't stop the rendezvous. \n\nThen, kiss her like you mean it, take her home and have petals everywhere leading to the bed. Have a bath drawn and the lights perfect. Have some Senatra playing in the background and start your engagement off right. \n\n\nGood luck.
432873
First off I can understand your frustrations but you must not betray your wife. To betray your wife would be an unforgivable act and the clock cannot be turned back. The only solution I can think of is for you to talk to your wife about your wants and needs and try and work out a plan together for how you can overcome this. Maybe an ultimatum is needed? I can see that you have obviously discussed this with her before with no result. I think you both need relationship counselling, if she refuses, you could go alone. \nI was once married to someone who wasn't affectionate and gradually our love disappeared to nothing. I was never unfaithful to him though. We finally split and as it happened it was the best thing that ever happened to me and i'm now with an ultra loving man.\nYou can't make any decision without at least trying your best to resolve your marital coldness. It isn't fair on your wife and it isn't fair on you or your families who will witness the aftermath. It could be the cause of much ugliness. Does your wife deserve this? \nIts worth remembering that all relationships set out in "luvvy duvvy" mode and even this new connection you have met will be more than willing to be loving in the early days but would things still be so cosy after a couple of years of reality living? Thats something you cannot foresee.\n\nGood luck :o)
1073042
relax, take it slow, respect each other's nervousness, be gentle, and just enjoy each other without worrying about the act, it will happen when you allow yourselves to realize that what you waited for was well worth the wait.  It was for us and we are still married 34 years later.  Oh, I brought a deck of cards along, and we played a bit at one point to break the tension.  It actually helped, and it was a very satisfying night.
974228
Don't listen to all the negativity that people are posting.  You can make it through this if you are both wanting too..and it sounds like you want to very much and she is cautiously willing.  So that is good.\nYou are both young with a toddler and you're a newly married couple...so with all of these changes in your lives that can be alot to take on and manage. It is good that you are both realizing that there are changes that need to be made to make your family work. So suggest to her that you would be willing to go to counseling even if it is once a month or every other week.  It's not a bad thing to have someone in the middle of the issues to sort things out.  \nJust keep on being open with her and be honest on your wanting to change some things. Also take some time to take her out...just the two of you have an evening out once in a while...be silly have fun...just be together...I bet it's been a while since you have done that. If you combine those things together you are off to a great start.  \nAny relationship needs work and there will ALWAYS (no matter how long you are married for) be rough spots that need to be worked through...it's ongoing. But as long as both people are committed to each other and seeing the family thrive then your really working from a good foundation.\nDon't give up there is ALWAYS hope!!!  Best wishes to you in winning your wife back!!!
79465
The new place in town or local happening. Resturant, art show, wine tasting event.... I'm sure you can find one that you would both be open to trying, whatever it is. The important thing is that's neutral ground so there is no baggage for either of you. If its a bomb she wont blame you. If its great you get kudos for originality.\n\nNo dinner and "anything", keep it short. If its not working you both have an out. Bad dates are torture and should end quckly. If it is working the night/day is still young and you can show the spontaneous side. If your not the spur of the moment type have a few ideas for part 2 of the date ready and fake it. Neutral ground rule applies here too. She's not ready to meet your friends or check out your haunts if she's not sure she's into you yet.
1069843
If all parties know about it and they're fine with it, I don't see a problem with it...\nBut I can't imagine the wife being okay with the fact that you were the woman her husband had an affair with... so I'm assuming she doesn't know...\nIn that case, if you two can play it off like there was nothing between you two, I guess you'll be okay....\nBut WATCH OUT, because people talk.... and sooner or later they ALL find out...
219672
Book her an appointment for a pregnancy massage. She will feel like a new woman trust me. This is one of those anniversaries where the hubby is to pamper the wife...sorry. But maybe you can go out to dinner where you had your first date like my hubby did. Very romantic. Just let her know how much you appreciate her and be very sympathetic of carrying a baby (it is very hard in the last months). just a couple of suggestions!
483976
It sounds like having intercourse with your wife is more than just a sexual release for you. It is "the whole package" - the emotional bonding, as well as the physical response.\nStart slow. Make time for sitting together with your arm around her. Use that time to talk about what's happening in the every day events of your lives. "How do you think our kids are doing?" "How was work today?" "Are you interested in changing our routine (the foods we eat, who does the cooking, where we go for entertainment)?"\nThen discuss with her that you've been considering her recommendation, but think it would be unsatisfactory. She may be more understanding of your need for her touch.
1074234
lmao!! Good for your wife!! I hope that this has taught you a very IMPORTANT lesson!! DONT CHEAT!
909877
If he is active and a person who takes care of himself I would recommend a massage treatment. My wife talked me into it and I would have to say it was fantastic. It could also be a great date together.
1089103
it sounds like you've forgiven her for the affair (so drop it - i'm sure years from now it will come out if need be), but she hasn't forgiven herself.  perhaps you should tell you forgive and want a happy marriage and want to have sex like you used to.\n\ntell her you're willing to do whatever it takes to have a happy marriage again because you love her so.
151922
This will require time patients and tact on your part.\n\nFirst start by reading books on marital relationships.\nA good place to start is either the 5 love languages, or His needs, Her needs. \nLearn how to work on marital communication FIRST. \nonce you know her 5 basic "NEEDS" are meet, and you have a way to talk with her about emotional issues important to you. then you can address experimenting a bit.\n\nAt first try things you can mutually agree look safe.\n\nLight bondage is a very good one. \nas are blindfolds, and a bit of voyerism ( in the home and just for you) you can even try giving her a sensual massage ( women love this) and it can help break the ice between you. \nTry to include romance for her benifit. \nlike make dinner, prepare her a bubble bath and finish with a massage. work on her pleasure with out expecting any fulfillment for your self for 1 night. make a game out of how many times you can satisfy her in one night. \nYou would be suprized ohw it can open up things in the bedroom. \n\nAgain work on meeting her 5 basic "NEEDS" the rest will come together once you can open up emotionally, and learn how to listen in an effective manor. \n\nGod Blessing be on your family.
259848
Stop getting any further, Love your wife and honor her. No good will come of an affair.
532539
This may sound childish but you’ll never know unless you try. (ROLE PLAY) walk right up to her and introduce yourself, ask what her name is and if she’ll mind if you call her some time. Then do call and (TALK) & (LOSTEN) and ask if she’d like to go out some time this week you know a great place *Note: if you have kids make arrangements so that she can’t say NO and if she can’t go ask her out again (do the thing you as her husband knows she likes, it’s like dating allover again, but this time you have the cliff notes)   get creative, get romantic, don’t let your second chance blow by.
1128273
simply surprise her on several occasions.you know your wife better and know what can do the trick.
411907
sit down together and make a list of the things that you do not want to go wrong this time and give it to each other.  Have the communication lines open. You might consider counseling this time around.  Having a third party to hear both sides without taking sides is a start.  You might just go 1 x a month, then go out to dinner after or grab an ice cream to make sure that after things are said in counseling, you are still ok and still in love.  Be sure to say I love you every night before bed no matter what the day was like and tell her you are so glad that you are back together.  Good Luck!