My fiance is divorced &now we'll wed. My 1st wedding - his 2nd. Should his family still pay 4 some o it?
106195
My guess is that they won't.  But it all depends on the particulars, like did they pay for the last one, do they like you, do they have money avalible.  Talk to them and find out.
1072621
The most important thing in this case is you. You have to ask yourself, "are you ready for marriage?". Most people do more planning for the wedding that they do for marriage. They'll fuss over the bridal registry, invitations, location, religion, and WHO is gonna be invited. But ask yourself.... what do you want for you? Have you accomplished your goals...Are you happy with your job and your money, do you have YOUR world in order? Marriage simply a legal contract bringing two people together. Nothing is gonna change once your married; sex isn't magically gonna get better or more frequent, all the bad habits of the other person aren't going to suddenly go away and those fights aren't gonna be more understanding now that you're married.  If your credit sucks... it screws BOTH of you up. If you hate your job... then the financial burden is on you both. Be happy with you...Have your affairs in order and enjoy the other person and the times you have together. NOTHING IS CERTAIN!!! and right now the percentage of divorce is over 56%. and if the couple is under 25...the percentage is 80%. PLAN PLAN PLAN! If you were handed a parachute and told to jump out of an airplane...but you have a 56% chance that your chute would open...would you take that gamble?
314813
It shouldn't make any difference whether you get married or not. Unless your husband has a really good insurance policy and job. I guess you could get updated. If that was the case for me, I wouldn't get married and loose my funds. Your marriage could go sour in a year and you would have a hard time getting your funds back.
580804
You need to consider your engagement. Maybe you are not quite ready to settle down with your fiance'. If you are questioning what you should do, my suggestion is that you should not get married just yet. You are obviously not ready to tie the knot. A lot easier to deal with before you get married than after. You need to do a lot of soul searching. Don't make a mistake that you will regret.
772571
When I was first started dating my spouse I was still married too. To me it really wasnt a big deal to still be married, and it didnt bother me much. It bothered him so he took initiative and pushed me to do it. I really didnt have the money for it and I wouldve rather spent my money else where. I just felt like it wasnt a big deal and that it really didnt matter it was last on my list of things to do. But it bothered my significant other so he pretty much did all the work, he paid for the classes and he paid for half the divorce. \n\nWhats his perspective on it? To me it wasnt that important. Maybe it isnt to him either. So if you want it to happen make it happen I mean obviously you cant sign the papers but set an appointment for him to see the attorney and let him know that you will pay for half the costs. Dont give him a reason to say no. Also let him know that this really bothers you it has been awhile and I am sure he thinks that maybe it doesnt bother as much as it really does.\n\nWith my spouse it wasnt until he shared how he felt, this was something that he needed to be done so that we could move on in our relationship. So that he wouldnt have been scared to allow himself to fall for me. Althouth I had been seperated for quite some time but it wasnt until he told me how he felt that I really took inititive in trying to make it happen, it was just hard financially and that was all it was it wasnt because I didnt want to let go or anything like that.  You should just tell him how you feel and I am sure that he will try to follow through with things.
1154617
You need to sit down and discuss your financial situation. Tell him there are some things you are just not comfortable with. Make a proposal to him on how you would like to do things such as each of you being responsible for certain bills or one of you taking care of the bills but the other reimburses at the end of the month. There are many different ways married people manange their finances. My 1st husband and I just always put all of our money together. My boyfriend (we live together) and I don't but we share responsibillity for everything (rent, groceries, utilities,ect.) I pay alot of these because I have more time to take care of paying bills but at the end of the month I let him know what his share was and he gives it to me. There is no right or wrong way but you have to talk about it and come up with a plan and budget that works for both of you. Their are a lot of divorces over money so do it early on before resentments start to build. Maybe he just doesn't realize how much money you are putting out. Show him on paper what you pay in a month. When my boyfriend was between jobs, I paid everything for a while and he insisted he would pay me back. When he did start working and he had me figure out how much money I had paid out he couldn't believe how it had added up. He did pay me back completely but was shocked at the amount. I hope you find something that works for you. Good Luck!
892812
Most likely your prospective bride/groom would be very upset.  Some of the family will probably be upset and wedding guests who spent good money to come to the wedding would be unhappy.  Also, most likely you would lose all the the money you have put into the event as by now everything has been put into writing.\n\nHowever, if you are REALLY not ready for marriage (this isn't just cold feet?) you need to talk to your fiancee and be honest with him/her.  It is unfair for him/her if you are not.  Sure they will be upset, but what about if you go through with it to only get a divorce.\n\nI would tell them, but I would also go ahead and have a reception for people who came anyways.  Maybe do what the one lady did.  She turned her reception into a charity event (because the wedding was called off).\n\nAlso, I would try to tell him/her as soon as possible.  Don't leave him/her at the alter, that is just plain mean.  It's better if you don't do it in front of everyone or right before the ceremony/\n\nGood Luck!
231337
To be perfectly honest, a wedding is a wedding, to me it doesn't matter how much you spend or wear you have it, all that matters is your marrying the man you love....mine was a redneck wedding and didn't cost much but I'd never change a thing...God bless
661958
It is all about trust...do you trust him??? If so..then why worry!! Go have a good time with your friends(dinner, movie..or day of beauty w/ lunch). If you don't , well then your relationship is headed for the rocks. You are not a married couple , or engaged so it could very well be a matter of budget.\nNOTE: When we got married we paid for our own reception and were on a tight budget...had to cut our "guest list". There were no hurt feelings...people understood and sent their blessings.
159443
I have always believe that when two people get married the finances should be combined and both should have equal access.  I make twice the money of my wife but I trust that she is smart enough to have equal access to the money.  She still maintains a small seperate checking account that we put some money into each month so that she can buy stuff, especially presents for me without me knowing what and how much, plus it makes her feel more comfortable.  But the majority of our money is in a joint account that she has full access to and that I encourage her to use.  When you divide money up based upon who earns what I think the relationship is destined to fail.  How can you be truely committed to a relationship if your holding on to your money to protect yourself?  When you really love someone you don't try to protect your self from them or the posibility that your relationship will fail.  To do so is admiting that it will fail.  Your other points are equally valid, it is in the families best interest that you have equal access to all funds in case of an emergency.  Your name should also be on the titles of all cars and houses and on every credit card.  I also think it is important that you take time to look at the accounts on a regular basis.  There are so many horor stories out there of one spouses problems bankrupting a whole family and the other spouse had no idea that there was a problem.  And on a final note, just because you want to stay home with the kids that doesn't make you any less important.  By taking care of the kids you are saving your family huge amounts of money without you ever being paid for it.  If he has to keep his money seperate then tell him you want an account and that he has to pay into it each month the amount that you would normally have to pay for child care plus what your not recieving from a normal job.
853820
i imagine he has a right too.. i because how much debt you have affects him too believe it or not... he probably doesn't want to wreck his credit rating with your spending habbits..\n\nperhaps you need to talk to him.. and figure out how much you can both spend as free whatever i want to buy cash.. and just use cash to buy stuff..\n\ni dont think you have a right to mad.. as being married its a partnership.. everyone is equal.. and he probably feels your spending to much
1172255
Ok Im the Boyfriend just to let everyone know and no Im not cheap and taste is the thing Im concerned about, see I really like yellow box cakes with choclate frosting so if we can have a wedding cake thats going to total about 85 dollars for a big as* box cake to be made at a bakery why not. Alot of people go pay 2 to 500 for a cake and then alot of people wont like the cake because its more cosmetics than anything else. Everyone likes yellow cake for the most part, kool aid also, what else are you going to get for everyone including little kids to drink besides a bunch of punch. I dont see why everyone gets caught up in this "I have to spend big bucks for the wedding or it wont be special" thing. I'm more of a "I have to spend big bucks on a house, ring or honeymoon or it wont be special" type of person. The wedding is only one day and sure its supposed to be memories but tell me this, will you really be able to tell its kool aid or a box cake (Cooked by bakery still looks like a regular wedding cake) in the pictures??? No, will you be able to tell that your honeymoon wasnt anywhere special in the pictures, YES and same goes for the house. Really in a couple of years are your kids really going to give a dam if Mommy and Daddy had a low budget wedding when your staying in a big as* house??? I think not, and in a few years is it still going to be that big a deal to you that your willing to take a couple of steps back on the size of the house or the neighborhood just for a glitzy wedding. If so you got your head in the wrong place. Personally I would rather just the wedding really low budget and put a extra 10 grand on a downpayment for a house that ups the price of your house $50 to 100,000 in most places. Thats all I had to say and hopefully you people will stop trying to live like movie stars for a wedding and try to live like them with the more important things (HOUSE!!!!!)\nAND WHO SAID THE WEDDING DAY WAS THE WOMANS DAY I DIDNT REALIZE SHE WAS THE ONLY ONE GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!
332380
That can be tough.  I believe when you are married property should be joint but that seems to be a problem in your situation.  I think you need to sit down and ask him how he feels about it.  Whether you're paying rent or paying on bills depends on your accounts. You just don't want to pay a lot for a home you have no ownership over if something does happen someday. See if you can come to an agreement after a few years or have something declared in a prenup that helps cover you. We all plan for forever but unfortunately it doesn't always happen.  Good luck in your marriage!! Have a great wedding!
922973
You are right - It's not your debt - So don't pay it off\nand if he is acting different toward you now then hes not worth having, sounds to me he just wanted your money.\nIf you do get married to him tell him until HIS debt is payed off you will pay 1/2 the bills for YOUR home only and he can pay extra on his debt.\nBut keep putting money up for your retirement.\n\nOh just don't marry him till he has payed it off by his self
177124
It depends on where his country is, but I had a destination wedding, they specialize in doing weddings in other countries.  You can go to www.destinationweddings.com, and for $50 they will set you up with a representative that will do everything for you - from travel arrangements, venue, officiants, etc.
902423
I got hitched for 25 bucks in Alamogordo NM.  This was back in 2002.  I really never regret it because my husband and I were 21yrs old pregnant and poor.  Next year we are celebrating our 5 years.  We are going to renew our vows and going all out with our ceremony.  We are much more financially able, and I never regret eloping.  Good Luck on your decision.
19911
Well that all depends on if you want your family and friends there. Ask yourselves these questions... \n1. Can we afford to pay for our friends and family to come?\n2. Can our friends and family afford to pay to come to our wedding?\n3. Do I REALLY want to get married somewhere else?\n4. Should we just elope and have a reception for everyone when we get home?\n\nIf that is what you want than go ahead and do it. Just explain to everyone why you want to do it. You only get married once and you should have it the way you want so you always remember this special time.