What are your favorite smart-alec quotes & sayings?
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I Did It\nBut I Am Blaming You
862623
This is my Favorite quote from the Movie Nick Mercer: Close your eyes. Close your eyes. Close... your... eyes. You're safe. You can relax. I'm not going to kiss you. He's gonna be so sorry he lost you, so stop worrying. Forget the past. Forget the pain. And remember what an incredible woman you are. You do that and he'll realize what he lost. \nKat Ellis: Holy crap. You're worth every penny.\n\n\n\n\n\nand yes here is the qoute you were looking for Nick Mercer: Here's to the husbands who've won you, the losers who've lost you, and the lucky bastards who've yet to meet you. \n\n\nI like that one too. Great Movie By The Way\n\n\nOh here's where i found it http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0372532/quotes
306839
So many to choose from! I'll share some of my favorites.\n\n\n"If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it." -- W.C. Fields\n\n\n"Sir, I admit your general rule,\nThat every poet is a fool,\nBut you yourself may serve to show it,\nThat every fool is not a poet."\n-- Samuel Taylor Coleridge\n\n\n"God has given you one face, and you make yourself another." -- William Shakespeare\n\n\n"It doesn't matter what you do in the bedroom as long as you don't do it in the street and frighten the horses." -- Daphne Fielding, The Duchess of Jermyn Street\n\n\n"Everybody loves a joke\nBut no one likes a fool"\n-- Green Day\n\n\n"Tragedy is when I get a little paper cut on my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die." -- Mel Brooks\n\n\n"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense." -- Tom Clancy\n\n\nHope you enjoy those as much as I have.
384782
When life throws you lemons..... ask for the tequila and salt\nAnd my favourite:\nDon't take life to seriously..... no one gets out alive!
800532
loved this one>> Needing someone is like needing a parachute, If he isn't there the first time, chances are u won't be needing him again!\n\nhere r some of mine\n\n"They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel."\n"Sometimes I wish I were a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts.  ~Author Unknown"\n"Can you imagine a world without men?  No crime and lots of happy fat women.  ~Attributed to both Marion Smith and Nicole Hollander" ...lol\n\nThanx
134876
I loved the Pretty In Pink panties quote, but my fav is from Real Genius circa 1985 starring Val Kilmer:\n\n"Can you drive an eight inch spike through a telephone pole with your penis?"\n"No"\n"Well...a girl's got to have her standards"
1030986
My very favorite line has to be Inigo Montoya's "Hello.  My name is Inyigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."\n\nBut after that it's \n\nFezzick: (for the umpteenth time) "Inconceivable!"\nInyigo:  "You keep saying this word.  I do not think it means what you think it means."
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Actually, I have a few favorite ones...\n\n"Look at life through the windshield, not the rear-view mirror"\n\n"The risk it takes to remain tight inside the bud is more painful than the risk it takes to blossom"\n\n"Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go"\n\n"You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly"\n\n"To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might be the world"\n\n"Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced"\n\n"Everytime I think I've hit the bottom, God lends me a shovel"\n\n"The important thing is to stop questioning. Curiousity has its own reason for existing"\n\n"Love is hard work, & hard work sometimes hurts"\n\n"True love never dies, for it is lust that fades away. Love bonds for a lifetime, but lust just pushes away"\n\n"We are not the same person this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changing person"\n\n"Love is what we're born with, fear is what we learn here"\n\n"Each friend represents a world in us; a world possibly not even born until they arrive; & it is only by this meeting that a new world is born"\n\n"Oh innocent victims of cupid, remember this terse little verse: To let a fool kiss you is stupid, to let a kiss fool you is worse"\n\nTHAT'S JUST A SELECTED FEW THAT I CHOSEN OUT OF MY JOURNAL I KEEP OF MY FAVORITE QUOTES.
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"Like I was strippin a peter pauls almond joy\nLemme show u baby Im a talented boy"\n\n-Gett Off (by far my favorite)
153659
My personal favorites (you can copy them if you like them:\n-Toothpaste on the telephone's ear piece\n-Pepper gum\n-Shocking computer mouse (don't try this if you're dealing with someone with a possibly weak heart)\n-Same-coloured tape over the infrared receiver on the remote-controlled TV\n-Word processor freak out (the victim types a common word in, for example, MS Word, and AutoComplete substitutes it with "I AM WATCHING YOU!!!")\n-Altered photos of "Jim with Trevor's girlfriend??!!"\n-Red or brown food colouring in the shower-head (good for Halloween too)\n-Locked wheels on the rolling chair\nAnd an all-time popular favorite:\n-Change your voicemail greeting so that it seems like you answered your phone, like "Hello? Oh, hey. I've been meaning to call you. How are things? etc."\n\nIf you must use these please use them responsibly, and remember to say 'April Fool's'\nDon't say all_2_true told you. ;)
559060
Sophia is probably one of my favorites.  She's the one I'm most like.  I'll say something very wise and intelligent and then within the same five minutes, say something completely stupid.  I love that about her.
928957
"All men by nature desire to know." \n  --  Aristotle
606666
my fav quote is "Life is like a box of choclates.. you'll never know what u gonna get" from "Robert Zemicks" film "Forrest Gump"
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"Beer is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy" - (or something really darn close) Ben Franklin\n"Beer - getting ugly people laid since 1863" (or some such date)\n"I'm the oldest I've ever been so far" \n"Faster than the speed of dark"\n"Whatever floats your boat and doesn't sink mine."
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"you've impressed me and it takes a lot to impress me... hey wow, look! a BLUE CAR!!"\n--homer j. simpson\n\ncoz the simpson family rock
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I recently compiled this list for a friend who has to give a graduation speech next month. Here are a few of my favorites. Good luck!\n\nYou must be the change you wish to see in the world. \n- Gandhi\n\nA person starts to live when he can live outside of himself.\n- Einstein\n\nMake your work in keeping with your purpose.\n- Da Vinci\n\nWhen you cease to make a contribution, you begin to die.\n- Eleanor Roosevelt\n\nMay you live all the days of your life.\n- Jonathan Swift\n\nWe are what we repeatedly do.\n- Aristotle\n\nNo matter where you go, there you are.\n- Buckaroo Banzai
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well, i happen to work with a young 20 something guy, and he is always saying something witty when he goes to the restroom.\nMy favorite for number one is he is "going to drain the main vain," and for number two is "going to take the browns to the super bowl."  Tacky, but cracks me up everytime.