Hello I have a very difficult question I have a sort of double life I am in love with my sisters ex-husband.?
104940
Has your sister fully moved on? Maybe explain the situation to her, and your feelings.  She may be a little hurt at first, but it would be better to be upfront then sneak behind her back
247337
your confession will just ease your guilt, it won't help your sister or her family. when you slept with her husband you thought only of yourself, if now you tell her, you'll again think only of yourself. how will she benefit from your truth? will it make her happier? will it save her from some mistake? it will be selfish of you. you did it to her, you betrayed her, now have the decensy to live with it and not break her life into pieces just because you feel guilty. but you need to talk to your daughter. kid do understand a lot at 8 years old. may be you can ask her to keep it as your secret casue you don't want to hurt other people. just wonder how could she find out if it happened year ago and you don't still have the affair with that guy?
989798
I don't particularly like my sister's husband and to begin with I really couldn't stand him and I hated the way he behaved and treated my sister. But I just try to tolerate him as much as I can. I don't want to hurt my sister by avoiding him or making my opinion of him too obvious. I love her and if this is what she chose for a husband I'll just have to accept that and try to get used to him.
894956
I agree with Rico, you need to think how much you value your friendship and what could be potentially just a shag. If you have real feelings for your pals sister and want something more, you need to find this out from her and talk straight with him.
186190
why not if no stringed attached anymore between the guy and your sister i think its not bad and its okey,but well you must tell it to your sister as a respect.Tell her the truth about what you feel and maybe she will give you some advices.
512958
The problem is that you're living with a fantasy, which is always going to be better than reality because you aren't dealing with the facts of the relationship.  Take a notebook and right down all the good things about this former beau at one end of it and turn it over and upside down and write all the bad things about the person.  When you can realistically look at the good and bad you can free yourself from your long standing issues and move on.
274796
You were married, there for it isn't odd that you would still have some fond feelings and good memories.  However I don't think you are in love with him.  I think you are probably just going through some bad stuff in your life and your latching on to some good memories and making more of them that what you should.  Remember, this same guy cheated and lied to you and nothing has changed.  You still deserve better in your life.
723251
talk to your sister first of all, because its your life, your decision. if you don't feel that way about him its best to let him know now so you don't end up dragging him through a more hurtful experience.
1044869
Yes, you are still young and believe me what you feel for this boy is not love. You need to move on with your life, and definitely, for future reference, never be the "other woman". I hope this helps.
1109525
First of all unless anyone has walked in your shoes they should not be judging you.  I am going through the same thing right now.  It has not been easy for me.  This person is a friend of mine and my husbands, he is also married.  We were chatting then one thing lead to another, the chat turned sexual and from there I formed an emotional bond with this man. Nothing has happend physically but  it has totally messed up my emotions, I feel like I am a mess since this has happend.  I have a great husband, and I am no longer communicating with our friend, but honestly I always think about him and miss him, why I don't know but it has been real hard.  This is one door I wish I never would have opened.  I don't know your details but the one thing I can tell you is to ask yourself what led you to do this, I had to do the same and I am in counseling right now.  Believe me I did not expect this hardship when I first started dabbling in this, it seemed harmless and kind of fun, but like they say when you play with fire, you will get burned and that I did.
306746
First figure out what feelings these are you have and how strong.Second imagine yourself without the person who at one time (and probably still do)you loved with all your heart,(loved enough to make her your wife). If imagining her gone and with another man doesn't bother you, then I'd say "its over",but if it does BOTHER you-Then stay away from whatevers tempting you,and focus on yourself and your wife.
841551
You're right, there may be something going on.  You will have to play detective.  If you get a chance try to see if he has received any texts from her and read them. Ask him why he runs your sister down.  You need to follow him if you can (without being seen) to see where he goes.  I wish you luck.
598071
I have had some of those same dreams about my ex.  I really do not know what to tell you.  The shrink says that there are some unresolved issues that I have with him and that I need to work them out for myself.  The difference with me and you is that I have a child with my ex.  This puts a big dent in things on the disconnection side of things.  The biggest thing is that you have to realize that these are fears that you may have in your subconscious that you may have to deal with, to make your dreams stop.  It sounds like your husband is really jealous.  That is something that you two have to work out.  What I did is reassure my new husband that he is the only one for me and that will not change as long as he will have me.  That may work for you.  Sorry that I cannot be of much more assistance.  If you want more advice let me know, K.
515506
Well I'm here right with you... The man I feel in my heart is my soulmate has the same problems as your ex... in fact because of the last incident that occured two months ago, were I came home from my father's after visiting for a few hours and he became very physically abusive, I left him... but i guess my heart stayed with him.. I still keep in contact with him, we talk twice a week, I love him more than anyone could ever imagine... he knows that I would take him back but he would need to get help... we tried once a year ago while we were together, but he didn't want the help for himself (he wasn't ready), he was doing it for me... the important thing is not to push them to do anything they don't want because then they may become resentful... I love him so much, it breaks my heart when I see him, because looking at him I know that he's not taking care of himself (he's diabetic, 31, and insulin dependent)... I always remind him that I really fo care and love him, and that when he's ready to get help, I'll be right there with him... just make sure that he wants the help.. if anthing email me... we can chat
1002349
Your sister loves you.It is part of her genetic code. If you he the special love,i would suggest increasing your dating circle. Peace.
125853
Blessings.\n\nMay I answer your question with a questions of my own? First, are you sure that these feelings you have for this new guy (let's name him "Ted" for the sake of easier understanding) are legit (real)? If not, that is part of what I think you should question yourself... along with asking "Ted" if his feelings for you are legit.\n\nSecond, if you are "committed" to someone else (let's name him "Al" for the sake of easier understanding) but these feelings that you have for "Ted" are so overwhelming, why are you in this relationship with "Al"? And if these feelings that "Ted" has for you are so overwhelming, why is he in another supposedly-committed relationship with "Sue"? It would seem, in my opinion, that you would tell "Al" (and "Ted" would tell "Sue") how you truly felt instead of leading him on to believe that this love that you two (you and "Al" -- "Ted" and "Sue") share is being reciprocated when, in fact, it is not.\n\nIt would be wise, I would imagine, to put this situation into perspective. Consider what it is (and who it is) that you truly wish to be with. Think carefully and tread softly for the waters (and feelings) you tread upon can be disturbed. You don't want a typhoon to come ripping apart your life. Trust me, I've been there! God bless!\n\nHope that helped!
239248
hey baby gurl i know exactly what you are going through inch by inch! you need to look in your heart and see all the good and all the bad he has done for you. once you got that itz like a epsiod of jeperdoy and the facts take it from there if you want to talk email me at ugot_me69@yahoo.com talk to someone who knows where your comming from