Time for a little FUN..What sayings have you heard that were unusual, that made you smile, or laugh with?
104301
What the fetchin heck?\nOh my F'in G\nKiss my tiara.\nGonna jam up your opera.\nPianist Envy.\nQueen Be-atch.\nEqual Opportunity Annoyer\n\nGood lines:\n"I am nobody\nNobody is perfect\nTherefore, I must be perfect!"\n\n“When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.”\n\nMy favorite bumper sticker:\n“Push, pass or get off my ass.”\nToo crude for my wife, so I made one that says:\n“Pass, Push or get off my Tush.”
622766
Never heard it before, but it really made me laugh. I had to share it immediately with the guy in the next room. He laughed too.
912350
Laughing\nMy\nAsss\nOff
465200
Since I find that when I am down it is usually because of other people's actions or sayings, I always remember this: \n\n"You laugh at me because I am different, but I laugh at you because you are all the same."\n\nand I suddenly not only feel better, but I feel unique.
803902
One of my personal favorites is from "Zoolander":\n"You can derelict my balls, capi-tan." LOL!!!\n\n*Edit*\nOh, I just thought of another funny one from "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective":\nLois: "How would you like it if I made your life a living hell?"\nAce: "Well, Lois, I'm not quite ready for a relationship right now, but maybe I'll give you a call sometime. Your number still 911?" LOL!!!\nPs. Thanks for the great question. You should get some funny answers.
6161
Falling On The Ground Laughing My A** Off\n\nmore popular version is FOTFLMAO:\n\nFalling On The Floor Laughing My A** Off
405891
BINGO!!!! it is definately the funniest one i have ever heard and not b/c its mine i swear. anyone wanna explanation? i wil give it if you want, its really funny.
836768
OMG  this is one of the funniest ones ive heard.  ROFL  Im gonna have to use this one :)
816097
I'v no idea but you made me laugh
1006825
Random humour is by far the best!\n\nchocolate pants!
871244
http://www.ahajokes.com/funny_answering_machine_messages.html\nhttp://www.ahajokes.com/funny_audio.html\n\nhttp://www.freewebjunk.com/funny_answermachines/\nhttp://purplecow.com/weird/messages/\n\n\n\n.
846048
funny =) gave me a giggle!
384782
When life throws you lemons..... ask for the tequila and salt\nAnd my favourite:\nDon't take life to seriously..... no one gets out alive!
252837
:) Yes I thought that was funny.  I love t-shirts that have funny sayings like that.  A friend of mine has a couple.
463117
www.firehotquotes.com \n\nthey have some there.. && if you just wanna joke around, take a look at the others too.
949951
Very nice one one, I loved it......I am rolling on the fllor right now. I just called up my brither and told him the same joke.
969181
Yeah, I laughed at that one too.  But I laughed better at your answer to the Jingle Bells question. lol\nI love your jokes and stories.  Keep up the good work.