I have been suffering with depression and suicidal thoughts for a long time now. I just don't understand why I don't want to do the things I love anymore. I used to really love horse riding and playing badminton, being with my friends and going out to the pub. Now I find it hard to even get up out of bed because I know I have to face the day. I don't want to be around my friends anymore, I just don't get it.
131825
If you have not already sought out help from a mental health professional I stongly suggest you do so.  Depression is extremely common and it can be managed by therapy and/or medications.  Either pinpointing the source through therapy or finding the right medications for you may allow you to enjoy those things you once used to.
565273
oh, sweetie, I am so sorry you are going through such a rough time! Is there anyone you can talk to? If not, find a counselor or someone you can trust, because it sounds like you need a good shoulder to cry on. Sometimes, you just have to hold your head up and live for better days, because it feels like there is nothing to hold on to anymore. But things get better, and soon you may find new people and new dreams that are even better than before, as hard as that is to imagine now. Or maybe your old dreams aren't as broken as they seem. There have been times I have lived for nothing but HOPE that someday things will get better. And they DID!!! Don't give up. I hope you find some comfort and peace that you need.
446446
You need to talk to a Dr. you sound depressed. But no one but you can change your life. If you feel like your stuck and cant do anything about it it could be depression.
546025
I feel for you. I have the same problem you have and I have refused to use medication. I've got a great husband, great kids and no reason to be depressed but I am. I've been taking fish oil and I am reading a book that comes with a workbook called battle of the mind. Great book. It's been working and I actaully feel motivated and I have been feeling less depressed.
533852
You sound seriously depressed there. Go see the doctor and ask him about seeing a therapist and see if you need a medication increase or change. If you are feeling unwell that too will make you feel bummed out. You have alot to live for so try to get out of bed and get out and about. Exercise is a good thing for depression , especially walks. It gets your hormones going in a good way and helps to chase away the gloom. Good luck and do not settle for feeling this way. Get to the bottom of what is causing it and get some help.
527278
I suggest you see a counselor. They can help you understand why you do it and help you find a way to deal with your problems in a positive manner.\nI've been there, and it's worth the time and effort to see a counselor.
113942
Actually you may want to look into counseling and/or medication.  It sounds like you may be clinically depressed.  Depression can pretty much take over your life, making it difficult-to-impossible to connect with others.\n\nA low dose of an SSRI and some talk therapy may be just the ticket to seeing the sunshine again.  Good luck.
375564
No, it's not normal to "like" being depressed. You should seek help. Maybe talk to a parent (if you're close) or a good friend. Change the things in your life that are bothering you. (Easier said then done, I know) But it's worth a shot. Do you want to be this way for the rest of your life? I hope not. Seek help!  : )
43987
You may be depressed already and have been for some time and you may not have realized it yet. You sound to me like your zeal for life is very low. That is a symptom of depression. Do you sleep too much or not eat even if you're hungry? There are several warning signs of Depression and a lot of us don't realize them. You're detached and that tells me perhaps you are afraid of getting close to people and of special occassions because you don't want to be hurt or disappointed. I would seek counseling if I were you. There's no shame in it and it doesn't mean your "mental" or that you'll be doing thorazine and weaving baskets, it means there is a chemical imbalance in your system/brain. Millions of people suffer from depression and there are good treatments with relatively few side affects. You may only need counseling. You are losing out on life, Honey and the people that love you will understand. Talk to them! Let them know that you're considering treatment and I'm sure they'll support you and don't let your anxiety get the best of you. Identify the problem, take steps to solve it. Good luck, and have a Happy, Happy Valentine's Day for once! =)
272329
You answered your own question. You were pushing the abuse away and now you can't any longer. It is easier to detach from your abuse when you are younger, now that your getting older it is harder to push away and the abuse is still happening that is why you feel depressed and suicidal now. It is a good idea to seek professional help. No one deserves to be treated the way you are being treated.
377962
I think that you need more than a friend...I think that you need someone that you can talk to who can help with why you are feeling this way.  Best of Luck!
109647
I believe we have the right to distance ourselves from people, and situations that cause negativities in our lives.  We are are at liberty to purge our lives with anything that is harmful to our well being - physically, emotionally and spiritually. It may be difficult because the more you feel you need your friends the more they will (or seem to) behave that way. Sometimes even the most cherished friendships have to end.  They have served their purpose and it's time to move on to better things. I've been in your situation several times before and I did just that.  Now I realize that I have very little in common with these friends. I was just trying to fit in.
205270
I just have to get out of the house when I feel lonely, once you're out you can meet new people and most of the time I end up having a conversation with someone I don't know, even if I'll probably never speak to them again. I go out to a pub or cafe and sit at the bar or a table just watching the world go by. Sometimes I take a book and it's suprising how many people will come over and ask what I'm reading or say that they've already that and it's good.  I also like to take my rollerblades to the park or the seafront if it's nice out, although wish I could skate better. Or I go to the cinema, even if I'm on my own I love watching a great film and for a while you're not really on your own cos there are loads of people around and no one is talking so you're not the odd one out. If you're out enjoy yourself, and just do things that make you laugh or that you used to do as a kid, even when you're on your own cos people will see you laughing and chat. (Just not to look like a psycho, laughing at your own jokes! :)) If all else fails when I'm lonely I call my mum, she lives 12000 miles from me and it's great talking to her.
514876
Unfortunately, it's going to take some time for that feeling to go away. I lived with a guy for 12 years, we were crazy about each other, then things got bad and he split. I met another guy just a couple of months later-- I didn't really like him that much but saw it as a way to distract myself from feeling really bad, plus it made my ex boyfriend jealous so that was kinda cool. I just broke up with that guy a few months ago after having a very strange relationship for nearly seven years (he was in prison for most of that time). Now I can feel the loneliness starting to creep back in. There are other guys that I like and I have a few friends, but no one who is "special"-- and I admit I miss that. But I know I can't force it; I just have to let it happen. At least I don't sit and obsess over one person anymore. It took about a year for that feeling to go away.\n\nIt's hard for me to give advice to someone in your situation, because really some time needs to pass before you start feeling better. I would say DON'T call your ex. Do try to stay busy even if your heart's not in it. Try to think of something you always wanted to do but never did before, and get involved in that thing. For me, I found that I really enjoy taking road trips and wandering around, visiting various places, all by myself or with my dogs. Going on road trips was a drag before when trying to get my boyfriend to go with me-- I found I'm much happier by myself and I have a lot more fun. I mean, I was fairly miserable for quite awhile, but one day I found myself sitting in a nice area after having ridden my motorcycle for a few hundred miles; I was just sitting and digging the scenery, smoking a cigar and sipping wine from my pocket flask, and quite suddenly it dawned on me that I was REALLY, REALLY happy. That was my "cure". I had gone through all that pain and I was happy again, and it didn't depend on another person, if you can see what I'm saying. \n\nAnd finally: The internet is actually a great thing for people who are lonely. I have met people in chat rooms and on forums that became good friends in real life. Yes, there are a lot of jerks, weirdos, and freaks in chat rooms and discussion forums-- but at least on the net you have an "ignore" button. It's a lot safer way to socialize. \n\nYou're not alone in this. A lot of people (like me, for instance) have experienced what is happening to you right now and they got through it. You can get through it, too. Good luck!
628175
Alcohol and some drugs are depressants.  They alter the body chemistry.  It appears that you're going a bit hard on them if you are having suicidal thoughts.  Get yourself some help, talk to a counselor, a friend, anyone.  We don't want to lose you.\n\nAs far as the "fun" part of drinking and getting high, I wish I had a dollar for every time I have heard someone say - "It seemed like a good idea at the time".   You know from your personal experience, it's not a good idea.  Think it through before trying that again.  No amount of fun is worth your life.
199305
what do you do as a job? i found that i had to change my attitude in a lot of different areas of my life. i don't know exactly what i'd suggest for you since i'm not sure what type of work you do. are you religious at all? that is something i got away from and i found myself sinking deeper and deeper into anger and despair. have you talked to your doctor about it? i have had to stay on an antidepressant. my family has a history of depression. sometimes we just have chemicals in our brains that are out of whack. it is hard to deal with life if your brain isn't working properly. i have made myself always look on the bright side. i dont' know you, but as a starter, you can be happy that you have a roof over your head and at least some type of employment. i honestly know how you feel. please don't consider killing yourself. i don't know how many times i made passive/aggressive attempts to harm myself. i was wreckless and i did not care at all. it's an awful feeling. i really suggest you talk to a doctor. psychological sickness is the same as physical sickness. some people do not understand that. there are methods to heal yourself. please talk to someone. i'll say a prayer for you.
463887
I am like you, I don't like clubs/pubs. People think I am crazy, as pubs are an institution where I live. But eh, at the end of the day, you go out to entertain yourself, not to be bored or feel awkward. And I don't drink either.\n\nMy advice to you would be to find something you like to do, like going to the cinema, to the restaurant with your friends, and compromise with them.