My first girlfriend and I broke up about two weeks ago. It took a while, but my heart finally healed and I'm not as depressed as I used to be. While this is all good news, I now think I have a crush on someone else in my class! Now, normally this wouldn't be a problem...but I don't know. If I ask her out now, do I look shallow? AM I shallow? Or do I wait longer to make sure I'm over my first gf completely?
134157
I think you've waited long enough. If you really like this girl, then why don't start talking to her more often. Become good friends with her and then ask her out, this will take longer, will almost be a sure fire way to get her to say yes, and will eliminate all thoughts of you being shallow.
439866
i know how you feel cuase i maybe just getting out of that right now...\n\nsee i haven't had a real boyfriend for almost 2 years  and about two weeks ago i asked a guy that is a grade younger out, he said yes becuase i knew he really liked me.. we went out for a week then i said i am just a lil over welmed by the feeling and just need to take a lil break.. after a while he started talking to my friends and practically the whoiole school found out we liked each other and now everyone considers us to be dating...  and we just kinda go with everyone cuase everyone else thinks it is great now im not so overwelmed with the feeling... i think the overwelming i use to feel was that i was afraid of being heartbroken again.\n\ndon't worry you will grow out of the feeling a lil while after you begin dating.. depending on however your emotions work..\n\nnothing to really worry about
116141
Normal. This is a normal situation. You have liked "this guy" for a very long time, and only thought about him. Once you were asked out from the "other guy" then you were "exposed" to another person, which just so happens to be attractive and caught your heart. So therefore, you got over the guy that you "did" like, and now your heart is set for someone else!
363014
yup..\n\nguys are like that..\n\nthere's this girl i really like, we dated 2 years ago but then i stopped for some reason i dont understand.\nshe's had 2 bofyfriends since then.\nand it really tore my heart everytime i saw her with her ex. \nwe were from the same high school.\n\nnow she's single again & i told her already what i feel for her.\nwe're dating again..\nwe're in college now. different universitys though..\ni don't want to lose her again.. ever..
120482
Well just try your best to go out more...hang out with your guy friends...Don't worry about finding a g-f so bad if you try too hard to look for a girlfriend you might rush into things...they will turn out all bad and then you will be back at square one...When its your time the right girl will come to you...If you got somewhere and then mentioned your ex...maybe you still have feelings for her...do you? How long has it been...do you NEED a girlfriend right now? I think you should focus on yourself and have fun. Are you still young? Do you like to party?  Go out and have fun,..\n--I'd like to hear from you.
60172
SO WHAT!?! You have a right to date whomever you choose. You can't go wrong with your heart, and she's YOUR girlfriend. It's what you prefer. Tell who ever dislikes you girl's looks to stop looking then! Listen, which is more important-- 15 min of fame or someone you care for, maybe even love. Eventually, the fame will die or get boring. Do what you think is right, though.If she's just another girl, who you might break up w/ at any moment, you might want to consider this. Not for popularity points, but for the obvious, not to give her the wrong message.\n Good luck, And be true to yourself!
376849
It's pretty hard for someone to forget their first crush from high school.\n\nBut you are in with a really good chance. Realistically, he knows this other girl is not into him, and she is conveniently out of the picture.\n\nI would go after him, and show him there is a real woman right in front of him who is on the scene and ready to be with him. He would be an idiot to choose a dream over that.
212196
omg!i have so been there!this is a perfect question!u see i liked this guy alot!and the same thing happened to me he got a gf so i was sad but then they broke up and now i flirt as mush as possible!so look my point is even though she has a bf still be sweet to her and flirt all the time and then if they break up try to become closer with her and then maybe ask her out!
141806
Ask him out, I guess that is the only way to ever find out if this "girlfriend" is real or just a way to get your attention. I'm guessing he's just trying to get a reaction from you to see if you really like him or not. Go for it and ask him out!
140208
Dear Sobby, Your question lacks some information. I would need more info to answer honestly and effectively, like why did you break up? How long were you together, and how long have you been apart? But vaguely i can tell you that if you are sure she is not interested in you anymore then you should move on, There are plenty of "fish in the sea" and hurting your self will not accomplish anything but getting yourself hurt. It will not make her feel any different.  As far as concentrating on your studies, it is imparitive that you keep your thoughts on them as much as possible. If you fail at this it could cause a chain reaction in your life that will cause you to fail at other things, and will also make you feel like hurting yourself even more. You seem like an intelligent person, so you should act as you are and move on.  If she doesnt' want you, find someone else, Its not easy, but it gets easier with time.
565
you said that you still like him but you didn't mention if he still likes you and i think he would not get involve with someone else if he is still interested in you.i can suggest that you focus on other things, instead of constantly thinking of him in class why not focus more on your studies, enroll in music or art classes. keep yourself busy until you heal and ready to get into another relationship. good luck:)
187761
I would go out. I had a serious boyfriend for 3 years from ages 16-19. I was really happy but I felt the same way. I took the leap to go out and I'm glad I did. Now, my ex and I are best friends. Even though we didn't get back together, dating other guys let me realize how much happier I am that my ex and I are just friends now. I didn't realize how much happier I could be until I had some more experience. Plus, I have overcome the fear of wondering how it is to date others. And you never know, you might date around and realize what a great guy you had. He seems like he would be willing to get back together after some time. This would let you know just how happy you are with him, and you will never wonder again.
179356
If you like this girl for more than her looks, then you might know some of the things she is interested in?  If not, take the leap! I am a 20 year old female, I don't know everthing about relationships but one thing I do know is that if you don't take that first step, you may never know what could have been.  If things don't work out and she isn't interested in you like you would hope, then things weren't meant to be.  When I was a sophomore in high school I dated a freshman guy who approached ME.  I knew then as much as I know now that he had a pair of you know what and I credit him for approaching me (I understand it isn't easy!!) And break the habit of talking through the friend to get to the girl, the sooner the better because you're wasting your time!! I hope I was some help : )
616129
I dont think you should be worrying about love at this time. After 4 weeks at actual 'dating'. And yeah...what your doing...isnt considered dating. My man actually went through the same thing. He had a girlfriend when he would try to get me, i wasnt having that. After sometime they broke up. He would callme constantly and come over all the time. Buy me things, take me to dinner. Then it all of a sudden slowed down...a lot. We had a good talk about it. Cause if the realationship is REAL you will be able to talk abotu ANYTHING. trust me on that! Then we worked out a schedule so that we saw eachother and didnt have a boring 'no more fun' relationship. Just remember that you are in school...and school is more important than anything realationship there is. And if that realationship is right...it will work out for you. Try to set up a schedule where you 'hang out' only so and so often during a week. Between this time and this time....on these days. After sometime of actuallybeing in a room with eachother...youll either want to be together more, or.......less. Good Luck!
161028
I met a girl on line.  Now she's my wife and we have a son.  But before this happened I visited her in her county for a number of weeks over some months.  It was only after this time that I felt happy enough to ask her to marry me.\n\nSo I suggest if you can go visit her.  Also is this your first real love?
456941
I had this same problem not too long ago. He made me feel like I was already his gf but I wasn't. He asked me out a couple times but I always thought of it as a joke, because he told me he liked these other girl(s). So my advise to you is, don't fall for it just yet. He might of liked you last year and maybe likes you this year too. But just to make sure ask him in person if he was just kidding or if he really meant it. Hope my advise helps you.
22952
If you are even considering another girl while you are with your current girlfriend - you shouldn't be with your current girlfriend.  Definitely, you need to get out of the relationship you are currently in.  It's for you to decide to take that risk if the other girl likes you or not though because I wouldn't tell her that you broke up for her or anything like that - I personally, wouldn't think that was cool.