I call my boyfriend because I miss him. First time I called him 4 today. This week has been going great with us. He has been coming over, calling me, & stopped doing drugs. He has done this all on his own. I have had no say. It used 2 be a lot worse.\n\nOkay so I call. Hey what have u been up 2 today? He replies with I downloaded a cd. Now my brother is over(I asked if he was doing anything with his brother as far as drugs). I ask him where he is at(for privacy) he says on the computer. I say can u go 2 ur room so we can have a private conversation. I then ask what are u doing on the computer still? He gets very mad at me starts yelling why don't u let me call u, why don't u let me decide when we hang out? Why don't u let me do this 4 a week & see who is 2 blame?\n\nI am so confused. He has been in control of everything. Where did this explosion come from? He said I was interigating him. I told him no I am not I trust you. He yells some more.\nWhat did I do wrong? I am very hurt!
124667
If I was in your position I wouldn't let things get to me.  You need to realize that if someone truly loves you and cares about you they will not treat you like that.  There are plenty of guys out there that would treat you much much better than that.  If you love him and want to be with him just give him his space and maybe eventually he will pull his head out of his a$$.  Don't feel bad and don't cry because I'm sure he doesn't care that you are crying and feel horrible.  Take it easy...the right guy is out there somewhere.
453704
this reminds me of my relationship.. it's hectic. give him some time.. you already apologized to him. Tell him to call you whenever he feels like talking to you. GIve him some time you already said sorry so that's good that you've accepted your error.. but yea goodluck... try not to disrespect each other.. once you disrespect each other then it's really hard to work things out... and remember everyone has arguments... just be straight foward with him and tell him that you already apologized to him and to please not be in a bad mood... communication is the key! goodluck hopefully he's not moody anymore... and ask him why he's moody maybe something else was making him moody :P
534619
You've already answered your question.  It's in your "question"/statement.  He made your life a living hell for four years... why should you even consider letting him do that to you again.  This guy obviously needs serious mental help and you're not qualified to help.  Change your phone number so he can't text you anymore and get on with your life.  You should feel no guilt.  You tried for way too long to help this loser and he used you.  Forget about this bum and find someone who will treat you with the love and respect you deserve.
314171
Hi there again. Was thinking about writing direct but didn't want to bother you again.\nI had a break up last June after a 7+ yera relationship/engagement and it took a little (underexagerating) time to get through.\nThe fact that he didn't seem to be bothered by it at all made me even more upset. I couldn't figure out how he could just walk out and that be it. No contact, no explanation of why, no nothing. People need some kind of closure to move along the healing process and I didn't have that.\nWhen I finally started thinking a little more clearly (took about a couple months), I started to realize the reason he was able to walk away as cut and dry as he did. It was because he had already been done long before he'd walked out.\nI started being able to put myself on the outside, looking in instead of the inside, looking in (hope you understand that). Then I started allowing myself to realize all the things that weren't so great and hadn't been so great for a while.\nI went from a deep sadness and loss to realizing I was worth more than how I was treated by him, either directly or indirectly.\nToday I am glad he left and didn't ever try to contact me AND I'm also glad he left.\nMy belief (and I've seen it proved many times over) is the karma people like that earn will pay them back tenfold for what they uncaringly do to people.\nOnly you will be able to put this to rest within yourself and only in the time that is right for you.\nI wish you all the best in the world. And try to remember you are worth more than the sum of one cheating man.\nAlso, sorry this is so long.
19063
perhaps you should stop reading things into it, don't try to figure out what he's thinking.  Come straight out and be honest with him, "look, I said those things because I was confused.  I feel foolish, and you may not want to hear it, but the truth is that..."  if he is any kind of a man, he will hear you out.  Don't play games, if he is worth fighting for, be straightforward.  He heard what you told him and he took you seriously.  Don't try to "make him call", just seize the opportunity and do so yourself.  If he accepts an intelligent whole-hearted apology and he feels the same, it was meant to be.  Next time, don't be so impulsive!
262375
I am also going through a break up right now. My BF of 4.5 years broke up with me 3 weeks ago. I was happy with him and he was happy with me, but he didn't know what he wanted out of life, blah, blah, blah. He still loves me and I still love him, so I have hope that we will get back together, but I'm not holding my breath.\n\nI too went through the depressed stage. I found that writing in a journal about how I felt helped alot. It let me get my feelings out without being overly emotional in front of other people. \n\nI am now in the angry stage, where I'm just so mad at him for doing this to me. \n\nI've heard that grief has many stages. My advice to you is to not make contact with him. If he calls don't answer and maybe wait a couple of hours to call him back. Make him think that you don't care.\n\nI wish you the best of luck.\n\n(((((HUGS)))))
667321
The truth will set you free. when you finally get in contact with him you make sure you tell him everything, Like how you didnt appreciate when he wasnt callin you and checking on you or nothing. Its alright to hear his side of the story but you give him a piece of your mind, and make him feel shity. you spending your time waiting on him to call, and he out doing other stuff. let'em know girl
298449
Your boyfriend is using the situation to manipulate you into doing his sexual fantasy.  He has got this idea into his head as to what he wants you to do, and now he is looking for any excuse to get you to do it.  He probably wasn't even that mad about the phone call, he just saw an opportunity to get his way.\n\nFrankly, the guy sounds like a loser.  He is trying to completely control you and force you to do things you don't want to do using emotional blackmail.  Move on.
367528
I think it is time you left that relationship since you know he is threatening to kill you, he sounds like a really jealous guy and you don't need that in you life. I am sure that you love him but it could lead to something much more worse then what it is if you stay around him. I don't think it should be his business who you call and who you don't when he is not around, I am sure he has other women that he calls, so there is not excuse there. You should not subject yourself to violence, you could call the police and have him arrested for assault and battery. I am sure what you boyfriend intentions are were to get your attention but I think that is too much. Leave him and find someone who is not violent and jealous. You need to do whatever you can to get away from this guy because if you stay with him any longer you could end up in a body bag on the way to the morgue because you did not leave him when you should have and that is not something you need to face. So my suggestion is if you live with him move out immediately if not stop calling him answering his e-mails change your phone number if you have to find friend to hang out with until he is out of sight. You can do better and you will, just believe.
542733
you called 7 times!  Holy crap I am surprised that he is talking to you at all.  Back off, that is too much.  Odds are if he did not want to talk to you when you first called, he sure as hell did not want to talk to you on the 7th time!  I dropped a girl for calling me too much.  She was cool and all I just could not handle the clingy-ness
252269
Been there and done that...not fun!  I feel for you but you have to be strong enough to GET OUT!  I had family and friends to help me out behind his back.  I planned carefully because he was smart and inquisitive, very controlling.  Get mad and smart too!  Figure out his work schedule and get it all done in a short amount of time.  Get a restraining order against him before you go so that you are somewhat protected when you leave.  Go somewhere safe where someone is with you all the time and has speed dial.  Get a plan B so that if this is not an option you have somewhere else to go.  Don't make him mad.  Above all don't let him see you are nervous.  Keep him calm and level headed until you pull it off.  Don't change your routine or compromise yourself.  Be sure to delete all "help" calls off the phone and alert the police of what you are about to do and the day and time.  You can also have the police escort you out once they know the situation if you need to do it that way.  My prayers go out with you!
224514
Sounds like a fairly new relationship, take it slow. If he isn't calling, maybe he has good reasons. Tell him your bothered by this, try to come to a resolution between the 2 of you. A good relationship needs amazing communication. No hiding things. If this doesn't work, start shopping for a new relationship. Always another bigger better fish.
165456
'he got caught up in some bullshit and ended up having sex with one of my friends................just read that back and see if it makes any sense!!!!!!\n\nNOBODY gets 'caught'up in something that makes them commit the ultimate no-no.  WIse up - people do things because they want to and they think that they can get away with it.  The reason he has called you again out of the blue is a slight mystery but trust me if he had realised what a mistake he'd made and wanted to get you back he would have done that 24 hours after the event.  He's just bored and is seeing how far he can go with you.  This whole episode is probably to hype his ego that he could get you back again no matter how badly he has behaved.\n\nDo yourself a favour and show him the door with a very large size 9 up his backside as he leaves.\n\nEveryone is worth more than this.  You have to toughen up and not let people rule your future.  If they bring you love and happiness let them in - if not get rid of them....for good!!!!!\n\nHard but true.\n\nGood Luck!!
174684
you are not defined by this guy.  You are just as special today as you were before he came along.  Do you really want him to call you and apologize?  If you let him get back with you then you are saying that you are not important enough to stand up for yourself.  Plus, there will be a new guy very soon, maybe the man of your dreams, do you want to be crying for this loser when the next one comes along?  \nYou are special, and he doesnt deserve to hurt you again.
334269
Talk to him...I played a joke on my fiance last night. He was kind of being a jerk and so one of our guy friends came to my house and tooka pair of my pants and my cellphone (he lives next door) and when my fiance called our friend said,\n\n"hey marissa left her pants here with her cell...can you come get it!?"\nwe were just playing and he knew nothing would happen betwen me an dour friend but he got SOOO Mad!\n\n\nTalk to him. get him calm enough to explain what was going through your head when you did whatever it was. Whether it was a joke or not. \ngood luck and keep me informed.\n\nrylanandmarissa@yahoo.com
207303
Call him on it.  It sounds like neither of you trust each other, so if you get down to the root of the problem, hopefully you can overcome it.  Have you done anything for him to feel betrayed?  It sounds like he's reading them.  Just call him on it and have a conversation about it.
301172
Obviously this guy has issues with commitment. I think he is using you until something better and more appealing comes along. Its like you are his last resort when there isn't someone else. I would move out, stop returning his calls and distance yourself from him. There is nothing but heartache ahead if you allow yourself to become too emotionally involved. Keep him away and keep your heart to yourself if you have to be around him.