My wife use to love a guy & her affair was for 4 years but my father-in -law didnt allow her to marry him but my wife still loves him. What should I do? 1)Give divoce 2) Make her understand that it is of no use beacause u r married & he is also married.
119396
She is over 18, loves another guy, and doesnt love you?\nKiss your marriage goodbye, sweety\n\nAnd you should accept it. She doesn't love you. You need to find a woman who will love you always.
641777
You're so not an idiot!  You love someone, plain and simple.  My husband and I broke up before we were married for two years and I never stopped loving him.  I knew that we were going to be together again, despite what everyone else told me.  Now, 6 years later, we are happily married.  Never stop loving that person, no matter what.  Even if they dont come back into your life, the love you feel, and the pride that comes from that can never be taken away from you.  You own those feelings...enjoy them!
173822
you should not do anything!! if she truly loves you, and only you..meaning she is completly done with her husband than she will leave him. but if you interfere before she takes any action..that means she isn't giving up on her marriage and maybe you should take a hint. but if shes willing to divorce him, than maybe you have a shot, but either way,you broke up a marriage(i know it takes two but you are an outsider coming into the situation) marriage is suppose to be sacred and you seeing her isn't fair to her husband, or their children if they have any. i hope you have morals and would stand back if she chooses to stay with her husband.
190003
Sounds like trouble. Find away to fall in love again with the one you are married to.Its worth the effort, isn't it?
472343
WOW! Good for you that you admitted this-that says alot about you.  I know how you feel and i have been in her place before-the best thing you can do is show her that you are sorry and that what you said to her was something said in anger and SHOW her that you do respect her and that you love her--SHOW interest in what she wants and likes--be patient with her because she does need time to get over this--i know it took me a long time to get over my feelings after the first argument my husband and i had-so give her time and show her that you know you screwed up! Give her the things she likes but do NOT try to buy her back with gifts--show her that you care and love her above anything else--even your pride!  Sacrifice a your favorite things and do the things she likes to do--she will see that and your actions will help her get over her hurt--you are married and time will heal things and help the both of you become stronger--you will see that just because you show her you care and give in on somethings you wont become less of a man--on the contrary she will respect you and love you more for that--believe me i have been there--and i am in love with my husband way more now than i was when we were "novios de manitas sudadas" GOOD LUCK and be strong!
23416
it is not possible to love them the same way. You will love them equally, but in different ways and there is NOTHING wrong with you and your hubby getting involved with the same woman. As long as she is ok with the fact that he married you why would it be wrong?
210721
My heart truly goes out to you and I know if I found myself in this situation it would totally crush me also.  You are perfectly normal reacting the way you are.  It would be extrmely hard to let this child into your life because its like a kick in the teeth each and everytime you see the child.  Its a constant reminder of what has happenned.  Try thinking of it this way:  You were seperated when this happenned so atleast technically it was not an affair.  Your husband thought his marriage was over and didnt think u loved him anymore so he turned to find comfort else where.  BUT he loves YOU and now u r back together and trying to work it all out.  I know it will be very very difficult for u cuz I know it would be for me but you are right- this child does need a father in his life.  You r right- he did not ask for this to happen to him- and he didnt pick his parents.  Take the time you need to sort thru your feelings and talk and confide ALL your feelings with your husband.  Let him know u need time to adapt to this major shock in your life.  You need to search your heart and soul.  If you truly love your husband and cannot imagine life without him- then some way some how you will eventually have to adjust to this child.  YOU DO NOT EVER HAVE TO ACCEPT this other woman.  In fact I suggest u never even meet the woman or see her!  Thats just TOO much to ask of your already broken heart!  But remember- this is an innocent child- after you have searched your heart- try to come to terms with this.  If you cannot you will have to end the marriage.  Remember:  U were seperated when this happenned!  Good luck to you sweetheart and my heart is with you.  Feel free to e mail me ANYTIME at cstinkerbell6969@yahoo.com  YOU DO HAVE A FRIEND and confidant out in this world!  I wish you the greatest success in all you do!
187395
You loved this person enough to marry him and now in a years time you can't stand to be around him, how do people fall in and out of love so easy . Might as well end it .I don't think you 2 were ever in love at all , it sounds like you were more in love with the idea of being married rather then the person you married. Hope you don't make the same mistake again.
630463
If you truly feel that it is up to you, then make your decision based on your feelings, but remember to apply the entire story to your decision.  In other words ... I have known people who have gone back to cheating spouses, and have built good relationships from them, but both people had to change from their selfish ways to ways that promoted selflessness.  The more selfless they became, the better the relationship worked.\n\nI'm not sure that will work ... I would tell you to follow your heart, but the heart is prone to evil and to the world.  If it is not your fault that he cheated (which it never is), but you think you should take him back ... I would do it.  Despite what the world teaches, infidelity by way of affairs is not the worse thing that can happen to a faithful spouse.\n\nBe well, and Love with all of your heart.  You're greatest reward is not on earth.
275770
Why did you both cheat?  Were you married, if not, why not?  It is not a game when you have children together, grow up, keep your hormones in check and your pants on.  Do it with your spouse, by yourself, or do without!  Affairs don't just happen, it takes no effort to cheat, no effort to do nothing.  No excuse for either of you.  I feel sorry for the spawn you have brought forth into this world.
99913
You have a right to be confused- and so does he. First off- how long has he been separated? If it hasn't been long, you may want to back off a bit, just in case things don't work according to plan. Think about it: they did get married for a reason- who's to say they won't reconcile?\nSecondly, since you can't really control who you fall in love with, if he represents this much of a threat to your security, you probably ought not stay involved with him.\nBut, I do hope it works out for you- everything for a reason!
7590
If you love the woman get married. My dad is going to get married and i dont like the woman but i id do anything to make my dad happy. Im 17 and shes been with me since i was 8 i think. I still dont like her. if you are loving and raise the child right i think hell accept you as a member of the family. He may never "love" you but dont take it the wrong way. I dont love anyone in the world except my dad and thats because hes been with me all my life. Do what ur heart tells you. I also suggest speaking with the childs mother and try to end this animosity. its useless to badmouth you when youre in love and are going to go through with your new life.
552539
When you say you've been down that path and you are no longer interested is it because your wife still bored you or that she did not try and please you ?? Perhaps she also needs a little help to try and spice things up. Maybe you are not being co operative enough and she figures , why bother l've lost him anyway.. I am just grasping at straws here , there could be a lot of reasons why you both feel the way you do. Please don't do any flirting of any kind , it is not innocent and people get hurt by this. If you are really sure that you can't make a go of things with your wife and you have discussed everything with her, your best bet would be a trial separation l think anyway. That way it may give you time to clear your head and be 100% sure of your feelings.Don't stay together just for the sake of the kids, it just means they are living with miserable parents instead of a loving home life. You never know, perhaps a separation may bring you closer (if that is what you both want ofcourse). I really feel for you l am sure you feel you are between a rock and a hard place at the moment. Hope all works out well for you. Good Luck.
255982
You need to sit him down and explain to him how you feel. and that you fear that it may end youre marriage. He has to understand that he married you and only you. yes, he can still have his family and also have loving wife at the same time. It does put a strane on the marriage. if he can not work it out with you and respect how you feel then he should of never had gotten married.  \n\nI was in a situation just like yours, now married 5 years and happy and my husband did work at it.  it wasnt easy for him. it took a good 3 years for him to see what and how i felt. it takes time. but, you must be honest.  You cant expect him to let go of family, but he must respect you and give you most of the time that a marriage needs.. good luck..and  dont give up...
158116
you are in the wrong for starting an affair while you r still married. i think you and your husband need to go for marriage counselling. you should stop seeing this guy and stop using him as a fall out plan when things dont work out. marriage require a lot of work and commitment. you dont just go ouit  cause you found something easier to deal with...
194219
I'm sorry to hear your situation but I'm sorry too that you have a men like that. He dousn't deserve you, he should at least had cheated when he was away and not while he was station in your home town. That sure tells you something.\nWell it all depends what do you feel for your husband?\nask your self do you feel in love with your husband, do you like when he touches you and that will sure tell you the truth. From there you can easily tell if you are in love with the other guy or just getting  back at your husband. Lovers tend to make  you feel like your the only one and that they r your soulmates, but beware because its usually a big flame of passion \nI'm also in that situation and I have found out that I don't feel that I'm in love with my husband no more but I also have 2 little girls who I think about there well beign.\nMy husband also cheated on me but the difference here is that I cheated with my ex. He is married and has 3 kids and he told me that he loved me he asked me to go live with him that he would leave his family but I never agree I was afraid. Good thing I didn't left with him a month passed and he went back to his family. That show me he wanted only one thing and like I never gave it to him he grew tired and left\nSo my adviced to you is talk it through with your husband see where he stands but don't tell him you cheated too!!!\nand if you want to keep on with your lover cvuz I know is fun ;-) kind of makes you feel alive don't fall so easily be open minded that way you won't get hurt\na friend that cares\nsweet angel
314226
IM BISEXUAL AND LOVE A MARRIED MAN. STRANGE RIGHT? I KNOW. NO SEX INVOLVED. THIS IS A STICKY SITUATION AND ONE THAT SHOULD NOT INVOLVE YOU. IM NOT SAYING THAT YOU SHOULDN'T BE WITH HIM. HE NEEDS SPACE AND HE MADE THIS PART OF THE MESS AND PROBABLY DOESN'T WANT TO SUBJECT YOU TO THE FUCKING DRAMA.MY ADVISE IS TO LEAVE AND MOVE OUT. HE NEEDS TO BE CLEAR ABOUT WHAT HE WANTS AND YOU LET HIM. IF HE LOVES YOU AND YOU LOVE HIM THINGS WILL WORK THEMSELVES OUT. IF NOT, THEN YOU WILL FIND SOMEONE ELSE. EVER HEARD "ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR"? I GUESS IT IS.YOU WALK OUT AND SAY GIVE IT A YEAR, CAUSE DIVORCE IS MESSY.AND IN THIS CASE IT DEFINITELY IS. IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE LET THEM GO. IF THEY COME BACK TO YOU THEN....THEY ARE YOURS..{SMILE I KNOW YOU ARE SAD} . BE STRONG GIRL,LOL HOPE THIS HELPS.LOL MEXXXI