We were together for 2 years, 1 of which he was cheating on me. So when he goes to jail he asks his "girlfriend" to call me and give me his booking number etc. Then he starts writing me letters talking about how he loves me and wants to get married blah blah blah...so basically I ask the "girlfriend" straight out, if she's dating him and she's like yes for 2 years or something. So we three way him and he's caught in a lie and later writes me a letter saying that he wants to be with her. NOW that he's out he's talking about he heard that I might be in a relationship but "he can't be mad". Should I open up the lines of communication and let him speak to his son? I'm in no position to let him see our son right now we live in two different cities. I've been avoiding him because I don't want the drama.
138485
It depends on how old your son is.You need to be very honest with your son about his father without sounding condescending.Make sure that you are being truthful but not mean.You have your own feelings about your man and so should your son.When you do decide to let them spend time together supervise.Make sure that all of you are on the same page and understand the roles you are all playing.Good luck
67705
girl, i think you need to sit him down by himself and tell him how you feel about the lies he been telling you.\nbecause girl the reason he is not telling you the truth is because he might already got a girlfriend or a wife.\nthe only reason he never tell you where he lives or don't give you the right number is because he might be using you.\nmy friend went through that and she still don't believe that he had a girlfriend.\ni just don't want another girl through that.
153714
Why would you even need to ask? If you caught him and you know he lied about it, then it should be obvious what you should do, unless you want to stay with a lying cheat that you will not be able to trust. Honesty and trust are the basis of any good relationship and he destroyed them both. Don't you think you deserve a lot better than him? I sure do!\n\nS.S.
399888
You need to get over this fast and leave this man alone.  You've just confessed to sending him to jail.  I don't think he'll want a second date.
332485
Yes, you had no right calling him.  Just because it was a guy that she was talking to doesn't mean she was cheating on you.  I can relate to this because I broke a 5 year relationship because of something like this.  My ex was accusing me to cheating on him with someone that was over 300 miles away because I talked to this person everyday.  I asked him to leave over 3 months ago it was hard to break it off with him but I couldn't live with him always looking through my stuff.  Now he says that he shouldn't have gotten into my stuff and acted like he did...but he did it himself over nothing. SUCKS THAT MEN ONLY THINK THEIR GIRLS CAN ONLY HAVE OTHER GIRLS TO VENT AND TALK TO!!!!
165456
'he got caught up in some bullshit and ended up having sex with one of my friends................just read that back and see if it makes any sense!!!!!!\n\nNOBODY gets 'caught'up in something that makes them commit the ultimate no-no.  WIse up - people do things because they want to and they think that they can get away with it.  The reason he has called you again out of the blue is a slight mystery but trust me if he had realised what a mistake he'd made and wanted to get you back he would have done that 24 hours after the event.  He's just bored and is seeing how far he can go with you.  This whole episode is probably to hype his ego that he could get you back again no matter how badly he has behaved.\n\nDo yourself a favour and show him the door with a very large size 9 up his backside as he leaves.\n\nEveryone is worth more than this.  You have to toughen up and not let people rule your future.  If they bring you love and happiness let them in - if not get rid of them....for good!!!!!\n\nHard but true.\n\nGood Luck!!
324206
Does it matter if he still loves you? You said you broke up with him and I gotta think you likely had a good reason for it. Go over those reasons in your head and couple them with the fact that he's cheating on his current girlfriend. I think we both know that you can do better.
22211
from what you say you only danced with him a few times and he got your name and number and you did not give it to him. and now he comes to your house you did not say wether or not you gave him your address or if he found that to. and now he wants to marry you. Well let me tell you he is a physco. i bet you realised that already. i went to pay my electric bill i called on the phone and started talking to the man that was on the other end. we ended up starting to talk outside of his company. he lived in another state. one day he got on a plane came to my home and said he wanted to get married. i did not no what to say because i thought stalker. within two days a call came in and it was from his daughter that did not no where he went to and did not no who i was. the story finally ends when i found out he has been wanted for 10 years and in 3 different states and i worked closely with them to capture him. now he is in prison. what i am saying to you is you do not no him. why all of a sudden do you think he would become that attatched to you. you need not to worry about his feelings because you need to worry about yourself. you do not no what he really has in store for you. and i would make it clear that he is not to cantact you again and that is it. you do not need to explain anything to him. this is not your problem it is his. if he does call you again then take the steps that you told him you would. be firm and good luck
281172
it sounds to me as if he is using you. He is keeping you on a string in case things don't work out with his ex. If there is nothing going on between them, than he wouldn't have a problem letting her know that he is in love with you. I think you need to move on and find someone who will treat you the way that you deserve. You don't deserve to be used. Good Luck\n\nk.m.
420646
Sounds suspicious to me.  Are you sure she's his ex?  How long have you been together?  Call her back and have a girl to girl talk.  She'll give you her side of the story.
156539
You need to do what your heart tells you.  Why did you and your ex break up in the first place? You need to take a look at that too.  Whatever you do, be honest with the other and don't cheat on the guy in jail.  That would be cold and will backfire on you.
667321
The truth will set you free. when you finally get in contact with him you make sure you tell him everything, Like how you didnt appreciate when he wasnt callin you and checking on you or nothing. Its alright to hear his side of the story but you give him a piece of your mind, and make him feel shity. you spending your time waiting on him to call, and he out doing other stuff. let'em know girl
349422
Unless you had some interest in the Ex, why did you talk with him a couple times?  Obviously, you felt you were doing wrong, because you hid it.  Now, AFTER you get caught, you whine about how much you love your husband, and how you want things to work out.  so touching.  Odd that you weren't all that concerned about NOT doing something your husband would consider being unfaithful, when you expected to not be found out, but AFTER getting caught, you are sooo worried about your marriage.  Just a guess- Did your husband have a problem with this guy before?  Did he specifically ask you not to have anything to do with him?  Did you promise hubby you wouldn't have anything to do with that ex?  Lady, you may find that some things just can't be fixed, and saying "sorry" AFTER getting caught, means very little.
19568
If he was in jail. it would appear that he is not making very good choices in his life.  Therefore, I would not want him contributing to choices in my life.\n\nPeople are subject to change though.  If it were me, I would not get back with him right away. I would wait and see if he learned anything from the experience.\n\nIf it is "true love", AND he has made the appropriate changes, love will find a way.
115050
I HOPE U TOLD BF#2 ABOUT  BF ON LOCKDOWN. IF HE IS A BIG BOY HE'LL UNDERSTAND THAT IT WAS JUST ONE OF THEM THANGS.AND I HOPE YOU DON'T THINK FOR ONE MINUTE THAT THE BOYFRIEND IN JAIL BELIEVES YOU WERE FAITHFUL WHILE HE WAS AWAY.
237421
First of all my dear friend, you are too young for this man. I hope to God you have not had sex with this man for this is truly a case of statutory rape. Second, you have way too much life to live to be dragged into the middle of this drama...and believe me, the drama has only just begun. You will never have any peace with this man and his ex (especially since you have indicated that he already talked about going back, then you say, he wants nothing to do with her only for the baby -doesn't sound like a firm foundation to me) You need to run, run, run as far away from this situation as you can - you don't want to be the next one with child.
468262
it is difficult because you are making it difficult. you are still obsessing over the idea if you should trust him or not and you should not! he can do the talk but can he walk the walk? i dont think so from what it seems! he seems as though he is playing both you and his ex and he is telling you that he wants to be with you just because that is what you want to hear! if he actually would love you he would act on other better terms and not like a jerk who wants his cake and to eat it too! i have broken up with my bf and so has he with me but none of us have talked with our ex's or tried to play the other person since we are both with our ex's-we are 22 and almost 24! i would not accept this guy's behavior no matter how much you love him since he obviously is not mature enough for you, your needs, his actions or his behavior! he thinks that playing with people's minds is fun, therefore he does not know and i think that this guy at some point will surprise you by cheating on you! do not accept him and all his drama into your life but rather focus on what you have and how young you are as well as that time will not  not come a second time around as well as how you should take care of yourself first and be in a healthy relationship! this relationship from what i can make out of it is not the best relationship so you might want to rethink it and make yourself happy with someone who can take care of you and knows what he wants out of life as well as treating you better than this! if you go back with this guy you are headed for splitsville another couple of times as well as more tension, lack of trust and frustration building! i have given you the info from personal experiences and i hope that at least you consider some of them!