One of my friends has started hanging out with this guy. We'll call him Bob. I know that Bob is a jerk from personal expierience (i've dated him unfourtnutly) Bob is also into drugs like bad and illegal drugs. He's starting to pull my friend into the drugs. I don't want that happening obviously and i don't know the kind of things Bob says to her to make her want the drugs. Shes never been interested in them before. I keep trying to tell her that he's a jerk, but she says he's really nice. Should I try to help her? If so, how? Or should I just let it go?
129699
You can go to someone professional and ask him how to approach her. It is very dangerous that he drags her into doing drugs...someone who has influence over her has to be told.
353484
ok. so. i'm 14, and i've been in that situation. just forget about him. if he's acting like a jerk, then he's not worth your time. don't make it look like your chasing this guy around. he'll think you're pathetic and just want to mess with you. forget about him. but hey, that's my opinion. oh...and. 13. remember. it's not as if he's actually changed your life in a major way or anything...right? so, yeah. i suggest you ignore him since he only talks about his girlfriend with you, and hang out with your own friends more. i guess it's safe to befriend him again when you're completely over him, but if he still acts like a jerk [even as a friend], then i suggest you just stay away.
359922
I would say its a bad idea. If this person is your friend then going after someone they were with is just bad karma. The best thing I can suggest is to talk to her and tell her how you feel.
113744
Well with your friend.  I had the same situation.  She is your friend she just needed a ride.  Don't let it bother you to bad.  She might come around she might not.  I wouldn't give the guy anything just let him stick around and charm you but dont buy him anything!!!
474705
Tell him in the kindest way you can if you are a true friend you will stand by him and help him understand she is a cheat why was he baby sitting while she was out partying anyway?He sounds a nice guy don't let him be deceived by her.
216009
It's a tough one.  But, from a female perspective...don't change your attitude towards her.  Most guys would start acting like a jerk towards her because they're hurt and can't handle the uncomfortable situation that they are now in as her friend.  I think you should just blow it off, don't make a big deal about it.  Act like she was the girl of yesterday, and a friend of today.  She could have been telling the truth or just making up an excuse because she's just not interested or ready for a relationship at the time.  If you show her that our friendship comes first she just may "see the light" and come around.  Or maybe not, and if so, don't sweat it so much-at least you'll still have the friendship, and hope for something more as long as you want a chance.
119296
I'd avoid getting involved in this mess. If she likes you, let her figure out how to work it out. She sounds a little flaky to me. What happens when someone more interesting comes along once you two hook up? Is she going to want to be friends with him? See my point?
439821
don't butt in. if she's willing to mess up their friendship (b/c shes gonna) let her\n\nand if it leads to that, dont take sides, stay nuetral.\n\nmaybe you should just try to prove to him that she is just "using" him in some sort of way.
202434
Sounds like they are both playing you.  She is NOT a friend if she could do this to you.  Even if she doesn't have a lot going for her, it's just an unwritten rule that you don't go after people that you know your friend likes!
337236
i would just tell her to be careful... guys can be real jerks... if you tell her exactly what he told you, she might get mad at you, and think that you like him or something, or that you are jealous, but if you just hint around how much of a jerk some guys can be, maybe she will catch on... after all... guys are the ones who don't do subtle very well, we women are masters of subtlety...
647488
Look at as if you just got a new friend. Treat him as just another friend (for now).  Try telling him this too, maybe? Go do stuff that includes other people and just act normal. Go camping, fishing, to the bar, a park, etc. After a while if you try to act friendly then it will become natural. "act a part long enough and it will become a part of you" I don't remember where I heard that quote from, but it's kind of true...think about it.  Keep conversations normal, as you would with friends, and then later on when you have a relationship with him you can get into the personal questions...as you would with any buddy.
354886
You sound like you have good morals already by not wanting to get involved with someone who does drugs.  Very smart.  I know while growing up, most kids want to experience and experiment with a lot of things that can be very harmful to them.  I am no exception to this.  I got myself into a lot of trouble as a youth by following the wrong crowd and allowing my friends to pressure me into things I knew were just not right.  Don't allow yourself to feel pressured into doing anything that you know in your heart that just don't feel right.  If you don't want to date anyone or even hang with anyone that does drugs...then DON'T.  Only you are in control of your life and the decisions you make will effect it one way or another.  Sometimes the decisions you make will effect others so always take time to think things out and be honest with yourself and your friends on how you feel.  Don't change for anyone.\nYou may find yourself liking this boy a little now but keep in mind, he obviously has an issue with drugs, especially if he's lieing to you about doing them.  If he's going to lie to you about that, who knows what else he will lie to you about.  As you get older and more experienced in dating, you will understand that honesty and trust are two main keys to making a relationship work.  It's not how cute or how popular a person is that makes them special....it's what's inside that truly counts.  I know that sounds cliche' but believe me sweetpea, it is the truth 100%.\nIf you want to keep him as a friend, tell him he has to be honest with you, because even a simple friendship deserves honesty.  Would you bare your soul to a friend who lies to you and who is nondependable???  If he cannot be honest with you as a friend, he will surely not be honest with you as a boyfriend and you need to move on to better people to hang around then.  It's always better to have just a couple true blue friends than it is to have and basket full of fake ones.\nStick to your morals.  Stay true to yourself.  Beleive me, there are many guys in this world that you will be able to pick and choose from as time goes by.  Pick one that makes you feel good about yourself and who you can make feel good about himself.  Pick one that can be honest with you and who you can be honest with in return.  Pick one that likes you for WHO you are and who you like just as he is.  If you have to change yourself for someone else, he's not worth it and the same goes for the guy...if you think he has to change, then he's not the right person for you either.\nI can share many stories with you about this topic (I've had my share of heartbreaks and bad choices) but I'll leave it at this for now.\nGood luck sweetpea and take your time in choosing the right guy for you :0)\nmarjenl72
590185
How about telling a "older friend" like a calm parent or teacher. Sound like the usual thing an adult would say but she does need help. She IS an alcoholic! Sleeping with a guy and not remembering it is called a black out. That is an alcoholic thing! Talk to her, be prepared for all the excuses. You will eventually lose her as a friend. lying is not far behind what she is doing. She won't remember what she has done so she will laugh it off or say "I did not do that" Someone older has got to help you for your friends sake! DO NOT let her suck you into her world of drinking. Sometimes drugs are not far behind. Be strong and tell someone, she needs HELP!
344416
You tell him that you are aware of his addiction problem, and offer to get him help. You can only help somebody that wants to accept your help. Your relationship with him will always come in second to his addiction with his drug of choice. You need to move on and leave this realtionship in the past. You may always love this guy, but not all love relationships are meant to last a lifetime. This is not a good healthy relationship for you. Cry a little and then pick yourself up, gather your self-esteem and move on and find happiness elsewhere. Take care of you. I wish your boyfriend luck, he'll need it! He has a long road ahead of him, before he will ever be ready to share his life with someone else.
555078
sounds like a playa, first your friend... now you, if you dont want to hurt your friend drop it
247443
Helll Yeah girl, I went through that before and look if he is a true friend then he would not put a fu** before a friend. You will still be there when their relationship goes bad and it will cuz she sounds like a biatch! Beat that ho down!
614950
I went through the same thing with my best friend. She did a complete 180, started doing drugs having sex etc. and it turned into a huge fight. I confronted her about it and told her how pissed it made me. We didn't talk for the next six months. Then slowly we began to hang out again. We are now talking and hanging out but it will never be the friendship we once had. You need to confront your friend then ignore him completely until your ready to reestablish a friendship on YOUR terms. Like I said it won't ever be what it was but you can at least save something.