i consider myself a good boyfriend and a good father i have been with this girl for about 4 yrs at first it was great like in every relationship,then the bullshit started happening she trys to pic my conversation apart,still thinks i love my ex wife, nags constantly about my son...wants to party and hang out which is not me it just seems like almost every word that comes out of her mouth is something to bitch about...except when we are having sex then she is fine, she seems like she is a hollow person inside with very little love and compassion for others... wtf is wrong with this razy biotch
129728
i don't know what's wrong with her, but if i were you i would get out now. how many more years of this crap are you going to take? if you have given her no reason to treat you the way she does and she still does it, she has some issues and you deserve better. in relationships where you have been together for a while and it seems like nothing will change, something drastic has to happen before anything will. take some time apart and reevaluated your feelings and the situation.
272082
I'm wondering if it's not you in this situation?  Maybe you should check yourself. None the less, if she's mouthing off to you, ball your fist up and knock at least two of her front teeth out, and say, "Hey bitch who do you think your talking shit to?"  Bet she won't talk mess to you again.\n"HUMIIATION", is not good.
660959
Sounds like she is a selfish spoiled woman. Marriage is about giving too, and mean comments are horrible! I would never do that, you are suppose to support and love, not yell and smash. Thank god you don't have kids! Can you see her giving them what they need?? Do you want children someday?? You need to ask yourself what you want out of life and if that envolves leaving a wicked woman then do it! You deserve to be happy!..Goodluck
222096
think this is a psychological issue with her wanting both attention, and feeling self loathing for her condition of having to rely on another person...\nperhaps, she knows u are nice, and may want to drive you away to make her self loathing complete...i have a suggestion; try to do something really nice, then talk to her about i dunno, nice things, things that make her feel godd, until you break and strip her entire facade of being evil, until she cries her eyes out. tell her u will be there for her, etc. then once u 'break' her, or strip her facades, maybe you can see the tru pic, or she'll end up loving u till kingdom come...\nsomething like that...
417725
You had 26 answers already at the time of my replying, and i didnt read them but i can imagine what most of them will say. You are young, your boyfriend doesnt treat you right and doesnt treat his body with respect - so why do you think he will be good for you when he's not good to himself?\n\nOf course you have got involved with someone else. Its natural. You want a proper life with someone who cares. Its not a mess sweetheat, he's no good for you so just leave! Really, just pack up your stuff and leave. It may be hard but it will be best in the long run.\n\nGet support from family and friends, and just do it! A&#92; year from now you will be SO much happier!\n\nIf a friend was in your situation what would you tell them? You'd said he doesnt deserve you, wouldnt you? Come on, ring your mum or a friend and say you want help leaving..... they will be delighed to help believe me!\n\nMy daughter left a relationship like this last year. He was a drinker and had started to push her around too. Now she is with a lovely bloke.\n\nI hope you get the strength to do this, and make a good life for yourself.
242609
She does it because you let her.  You need to dump her.  Just do it.  She'll continue to treat you like dirt (and every other guys she dates) until she's old and bitter.  There will never be a man good enough for her.  It sucks I know, but some people just don't know that they suck.  She's got to be told now.  Then get your butt somewhere there are lots of healthy positive girls and try, try again.
449236
I think she has an integrity issue and I think you should leave her alone.  It also occurs to me that if anything came of you and her, wouldn't everyone know?  I think she's toying with you and seeking a little more gossip to spread.\n\nSorry sweetie.  There are really good girls out there and you deserve so much better than this.
568693
ones psychological rationalities are a strange thing and not always rational. im no doctor but have wittnessed and experienced plenty. shes probably overwhelemed with a multitude of emotions. i mean who doesnt want to stay with the father of their child especially if her parents are divorced. fear of change is usually a big one aside from the fact that people who are in abusive relationships lose their self respect and strength giving them a sense that theyll never do better, cant survive without him, or begin to rationalize that maybe they are to blame and with guilt things just get worse. its not easy to rationalize that you deserve a specific kind of respect and demanding that is ok (its self respect)demand nothing less than what you give. or maybe shes a super sensitive and truly feels that he needs her and cant survive if she leaves. sometimes its easier to let youself be hurt than to hurt someone else. in the end its always easier said than done.
186950
I really feel for you. Unfortunately there isn't a lot you can do. Except, perhaps talk honestly with your son about your concerns. However, only address your genuine concerns about HIS happiness and try to avoid bringing up his GF specifically (or he will immediately get defensive -- or lie, as you mentioned). \n\nThen it's up to him to process it all and figure out what HE wants to do.\n\nIt's hard to see our kids make a mess of their lives. But, at the end of the day when our children become adults - we have to realise we've done our job as parents -- and we have to hope those values will kick in at some point and have a stabilising effect in their lives. Our job at this point is to carry on loving them -- not judging them.\n\nWe all screw up -- and we all find a way in the end. The best thing you can do is continue to love him. Don't judge him. Don't judge her. Love them both (since it sounds like they really will end up together). Draw reasonable boundaries. Ignore silly, immature, insensitive comments made by the GF -- she'll hopefully grow out of it. You may grow to like her. Hopefully, one day she'll look back and see how patient you were with her - and you'll find a way to forge a bond together. Afterall, if they really do end up married -- and having children -- she's going to be in your lives for a long time. So do your best to make her feel she's accepted into the family. Otherwise you'll alienate your son.\n\nA difficult line to tow -- but if you set aside your personal likes and dislikes -- maybe you'll be able to see something good in her. Your son does.\n\nGood luck.\n\nPrayer wouldn't hurt either.
607639
oh man, it sounds like a divorce and is probably going to feel like a divorce.  If she thinks you are doing well and she is not, then that is her problem and not yours.  Don't let her make it your problem.  She has to come to terms with her own issues and maybe she can't do it if she is constantly comparing herself with you.  When you run into her, always smile, ask about her son, just carry on with life and maybe tell her you'd like them to come over for dinner sometime if you'd like.  She has dropped the friendship, not you, and so really the ball is in her court to pick it back up.
329957
Honestly what do you expect?  I mean it is your BEST FRIEND'S EX.  Even if she says she's cool about, deep down inside she might not be.  Why don't you ASK her why she keeps bashing your man.  She could be jealous, or she could be telling the truth about how he really acts.  I have two friends who are MARRIED to my ex's, and I'm completely fine with it.  I never knock their hubbies or anything. Of course both of their hubbies are good guys, and I dumped them.
566559
You are very strong for asking this question. You are certainly not asking for too much. This is not a problem she has with you, but a problem she has with commitment. She, for some reason, is not prepared to be as selfless and giving in a relationship as you have been with her. Maybe something is going on with her that is , creating this distance between the two of you. All though you probably already have, I suggest that you confront her and ask if their is an outside issue. If there is an outside issue and you help her through it, then you're relationship will be sstronger than ever. Best of luck to you!
437314
Come on guy!!!!...  Sounds to me like your mad and you have no idea what your talking about and you want to get some support for people you don't even know on this site.\n\nWhat has she told you...? If this is really true and not just in your head, why are you still there?  And don't tell me it's because you love her.  Just because you love someone doesn't mean you have to put up with their crap and she just thinks of you as just a backup ****.  \n\nIf this is for real, leave.  Even if it isn't real, leave.  Your head is so screwed up you couldn't think straight abut her anyway.  Just leave.
325224
Sounds like you are over-compromising and not being yourself. If you always do what she wants, how can she do what you want and why would she?! A relationship should be give and take but if someone can get away with making no effort etc, then they are going to. Start suggesting what you want to do, don;t always agree with everything she says. It might also make you a bit more exciting to her again. That is not about being raised right - you can still be polite etc but just about being yourself not a doormat.
652650
You are engaged in some kind of power struggle here. They are not kids anymore, but need their mommy? They are either spoiled rotten, or are playing games with the 2 of you. If your gf thinks this is normal, I would forget her. She obviously doesn't know when to focus on her own life. I can see them living with you when they're forty. Scary, isn't it?\nTell your gf to get her priorities straight, or she will lose you.
377843
sorry to say this, but your wife sounds trife! any woman who wont recognize a man thats willing to take care of you and you cant even make sure he comes home to a clean house? she sounds verrrry comfortable. like she knows she "got you". she probably talks shit about you to her girlfriends. do you go away alot? talk to her, if that doesnt work, tell her to kick rocks!! you dont sound happy with her, you should always be happy.
616330
Been there. You didn't say how the ex feels about you. Why does she deny him seeing his child? Because I do not know if my answer will help if you don't have the same life I had. The ex hated me and didn't mind telling everyone she knew. She thought I was the root of their separation. I didn't even know my now husband at the time they 1st broke up. I had been going with him for about 5 months when I found out that he wasn't DIVORCED! So for that reason she used us being together as what was wrong with their relationship. She told everyone that Mike drank all the time and that she didn't trust him being alone with his son. When really it was a way to punch him for leaving her. The reason for not getting a divorce right away, he didn't want them to cancell their medical insurance. Dumb then...we played her game for many months. Then I started checking things out. He could get the divorce, keep insurance on his kid, pay child support (a must) and the court would let him have his son every other weekend. If she didn't produce the child..She could go to jail. So Check it out where you leave. Your man may want to make the divorce legal...Now to the other part of your question..Why does she have to be there..Just to piss you off more than likely. She will dress up and look great. As if to say..see what you are missing. Have him get a divorce..then the ball is back in your court. Only never be late on one child support payment..or you guess it..she would have him in jail..Again just to piss you off. Don't let her get you down. But, make him make a choice and get a divorce..or get the hell out now why you can.