I only like to get into relationships that stand a chance to be long term and possibly lead to marriage. When in these relationships, I prefer to hold off on the sex so I can see the other person's true colors. When I am confident that I could live with that person for the rest of my life, then I will be MORE THAN WILLING to have sex. So far, leaving this aspect out of my relationships has helped keep my eyes open and helped me see things in people that I didn't see at first. So far, I have no regrets but I believe that this could have led to the ending of at least 2 relationships. Let me know what you think. If you couldn't gather it already, I am a virgin in my mid 20's. And I'm a male. I would like to hear responses from girls in the same age range.
132164
i'm sorry to say, i am also not in your age group. but what your doing is great, as for those relationships, you truly are better off, i dont know what kinda girls your dating, but girls down where i live would KILL to meet guys like you. so just keep your head up high, and dont be asamed for who you are. once again i'm sorry i'm not in your age group
20360
I'm not sure if i would be in that type of position when I get into a serious relationship (hope so lol) but I would do it if i was with someone I trusted. I like kinky stuff like that anyways, it's not immature, it's fun.
137000
I myself am not inclined to date a guy more then a year or two younger then me. The stereotype says that young men are immature and while it does have it's truth I think it's more about life experience and I couldn't handle a guy that not on my level. I am not saying relationships with large age gaps don't work, just that I would pass on that scene. On the flip side women are sometimes attracted to older men, again that whole stereotype that older men are more mature. For one that's not always true and in most cases older guys looking for younger women are just using them for sex and half of those guys are still married. I guess what I am trying to say is they have to much baggage. They have been screwed over by too many other women generally and so again not that those relationships don't work out but I have no intention on venturing there either.
122047
Yes, if you've done this many times.  But if this is the first time, No and learn from this mistake.\n\nGuys have their preferences, if virginity is important to them they will surely feel bad about it and most probably shy away from a long term relationship with you.
91436
I dont know that its a lack of moral education, for moral education is dependent on what your morality is.  Bout the 20's our ideals and ideas of what is right and wrong for us.  and it has evolved into what it is today.  I personally dont see having sex on the first date a necessarily a bad thing.  (not stating its done often just stating that it depends on the person)  it also depends on where you meet the person.  Environment plays a part as to what is intended.  Bars and the like. I dont know that flirting and looking will come to saying hey i want sex, I think that will stay the same.  But dating has changed and you need to either try to avoid the first date sex or embrace it.  Its depends on what you and your partner (date) want.
165801
Don't feel bad, hey. It's not the most appealing thing as a girl wants to feel like she has someone who knows what they are doing. What you need to do then, is spend all your time making it good for her and be willing and you will be fine. I slept with a guy who was a virgin and he was 24. I got over the fact he was a virgin cos I thought he was the most hottest guy I had ever been with and I loved his personality. What killed it a bit though, is he was pretty nervous which is understandable, but he wanted me to do everything. Just act confident, and if the chick knows you are a virgin she will understand it will get better and better. If you have casual sex, lie and say you aren't a virgin. Be confident, and she'll be none the wiser. Be honest if you are actually going out with someone. Don't worry matey, it wouldn't turn me off you.
569412
Well, I definitely don't think it's uncommon for guys to choose the "wrong" girl. Guys tend to think about the wrong thing when it comes to virginity, which is what they're doing instead of who they're doing it with. To me, it doesn't matter how old you are when you lose it, because it's not a contest. It's all about feeling comfortable with the person you're with and wanting it to be with them. I say to hell with today's standards because there are kids in elementary school these days having sex and getting pregnant - it's ridiculous! But somehow our society would rather have that than being embarrassed by a plethora of 25 year-old virgins.\n\nI never was phased by my peers when it came to my choices. I lost mine at a fairly "normal" age, which was 15, and it also needs to be kept in mind that I am much more mature in my thinking than others that age because of how I grew up with a bunch of brothers who were pretty promiscuous. I knew I wasn't going to do it unless I REALLY felt it was right, and that's exactly what happened. I am glad that I did it, because it helped me learn even more (but in a good way since it was my own content choice). And, I haven't had any other partners since him.\n\nI say, don't have any shame if you lost it at 20 - I actually praise you for that because most guys would have broke down just to be a part of the crowd well before that. But if you wish it was with another girl, just take it as future advice for yourself. You can't change what happened before but you know how to feel about it now, so I think that's what's important. I'd rather be like that than someone who does it with 10 wrong girls.
407328
Almost always pretty early into it (I'm in my thirties).  I would consider it unusual not to have sex if we slept together, but still ok - actually quite nice.  The girls I remember the best (and in the best way) always waited.  It is really awesome to be with a good girl and to just be able to hold her without going farther.  Just be sure to keep the kissing to a minimum so things don't get out of hand.  Sitting under a blanket together can be romantic, but romantic isn't defined by just one thing - it is a combination of things that make a situation romantic.
195678
It's a good sign that you're wondering if you're ready for a b/f. If you feel that you want that it's all good. Just be careful not to go too far too fast. At that age it feels like it will last a Lifetime, but the reality is 3 mos. and another 3 yrs. of heartache. But that's how you get better at relationships down the line. Take it light, have fun, go out, do stuff; just don't spend all you time in the bedroom. Relationships are about a LOT more than that. Yet it's also hard to resist at that age. (I know how I was, and maybe that's the farthest thing from your mind. All I'm saying is don't give too much away too fast.)
225519
You sound somewhat like me a year ago. I don't have Christian values, but I valued myself enough that I didn't take sex lightly. I waited until I was 21 and would have waited longer if I had not found the perfect guy that I know I want to be with forever. Stick to what you believe and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. There is NOTHING wrong with being a virgin and waiting until you're ready to have sex. Worry about school, that's the most important part, not what your friends think.
193774
sex isn't just an act there are emotions that will go along with being with someone in this way . If he really loves you he will wait dont comprimise your morals  your only a virgin once once you have you cant go back  yes you can remain from having sex but your so young sex will always be there. i dont know him  but the guys i dated will tell you what ever it takes to get you into bed the good ones wont pressure you    i know  its hard  we have all been there   also if you happen to get prenant are you really ready for  all that respnsiblity  it will change your life .  some people are more mature than others at this age  just write down your thoughts  maybe seeing it on paper will help you decide    go talk to girls your age and get there input the ones that have babies on just the ones that have been through this stuff   you said you have morals and goals    if you are a religious person  go talk to a  teen  counselor than can help without judging  you . and if your parents  change their mind and decide to press legal charges against him because of his age  prison isnt going to be a place for him    dont risk  doing that to him     even if you dont want them to they can still override  and go to the law    i'm  not trying to scare you  just want you to get all the  facts before you make the decision   i wish someone would have told me about all the emotionally things that go along with sex    i have been with several  guys  when i was your age  i'm 20 something   and i still have  emotions from my first time  and  the times after  that.  there is so much life to experience  take it and run but be carful.
168891
love is all about taking risks if you aren't ready and willing to put yourself out there you will never be successful and yeah you might get rejected but at least you tried. my motto is i don't regret the things i have done only the things i never tried. if you never try you will never know. and FYI listening to your Friends on dating advice usually isn't the most reliable source especially if you are 15. follow your heart it is your best resource
309252
I am 40 and the last guy I dated was 28 but he was very mature for his age. Ordinarily I don't date guys quite this young (my cut off point is usually mid-thirties) but there was something about him... Our relationship lasted 6 months but it turned out that he was immature in some ways after all (he used to cross-examine me about my previous relationships, for one and got ridiculously jealous) and I am too old to put up with that sh!t. So I ended it.\n\nThere is nothing wrong with wanting to date older women but be aware - some of them will want more from you than you might be prepared to give. You also have to be able to hold their interest outside the bedroom. In my experience, most guys in their 20s can't do this because they simply don't have enough life experience/exposure to relationships.\n\nIt is also true that there will be some older women out there who want nothing more than a bunk up. I wish you luck finding them.
355341
I love the lack of answers!!\n8, and I'm 20. I deffinately consider myself to be a guy that sleeps around alot.\nHOWEVER. This is not something I am proud of. I regret alot of the things I've done, and although I enjoy sex as much as the next guy, I'd much prefer fewer partners for longer periods of time.\nDo you mind answering something? Whats the ideal answer you're looking for?
521026
Ok, this may shock you as I have different feelings about sex than you do but hear me out. Sex is not that big a deal. It is a natural thing that occurs everywhere all the time. Losing your virginity is NOT that big a deal either, it shows you the beginning to a world of natural instincts, however it has consequences so be careful from now on. Get it out the way (not from a young age mind you, I was 17 when I lost mine and that is a common age even though sometimes I feel the kids of today are starting to blossom earlier - I am going on now...). Nothing came from having unprotected sex did it? No babies on the way? No STD's or diseases? No? Then realise that you had a good time with no consquences of a physical nature and move on, not point dwelling on the past - you can't change it. Just learn from it. Don't be afraid to try new things either, its fun and you're not the first ever to try it ok.\n\nLife is not always that bad, not always great but not that bad either. Partying is always fun, but going to the extreme and partying all the time is bad for your health. I suggest you join a group or get a job (good luck with the interview by the way) and meet new people that way. Charity work is always rewarding and you meet new people too. As for your roomate, there are ways to live with people even if you don't like them. I work with guys I can't stand and as I am in the Army, its hard to get away from them, I learn to deal with it. It strengthens my character to be the bigger man and act like the mature adult I am rather than stoop to their lows. Just remember that there are others out there less fortunate than yourself and pick up your head. \n\nOn the God thing..... I am agnostic. If he exists, which in your case you believe he does, you must seek him, not the other way around. He won't come and say hey, pick your chin up and be better for it. You have to do it yourself, and thank Him for the realisation that the only thing you can do to help someone is to show them how to help themselves. \n\nSo remember, sex is great, join a social group, find a charity to work for or a paying job (school first though), live life with your head held high and proud, and look after yourself in a hard world. Good luck.
505857
My oppinion is that you are a few of the smart loyal and honest men out there and I applaud you for your well train of thought and consideration. I do not feel anyone should look down on you just because you have considered things that for others it doesn't even cross their mind. Continue your great way of thought simply because so many of us fall under pressure especially when being tempted with sex, and drugs. I was also a virgin when I got married and so many friends told me I'd regret it but I've been married for a year and the thought of cheating on my husband because I never had anyone before him never crosses my mind. Not to mention the great respect I got and continue to get from my husband everytime we make love!  I'm sure you will find somone someday who is going to also appriciate your well thought in life! Good luck and God bless
23017
It's up to you and your boyfriend/girlfriend.   I was married when I was 18 and now I am 20.  My husband and I decided not to have sex before we got married. I know that some people regret having sex before they are married becasue it causes problems in their future relationships. But this is what worked for us.  You would have to talk it over with your sigificant other to decide what will work for you.