Mine has to be "Well, I've never been to Mars, but I imagine it's quite lovely".  What's your's?
126548
After Jon Lovitz confessed to george "I'm living a lie". George replies:\n "Just one? I'm living like 20"
586134
"Don't Phunk With My Heart" only because my three year old daughter loves it and sings her heart out to it.\nVery funny.
454438
good one\n\n:> peace\n.
419319
One of my personal favorites is from "Zoolander":\n"You can derelict my balls, capi-tan." LOL!!!\n\n*Edit*\nOh, I just thought of another funny one from "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective":\nLois: "How would you like it if I made your life a living hell?"\nAce: "Well, Lois, I'm not quite ready for a relationship right now, but maybe I'll give you a call sometime. Your number still 911?" LOL!!!\nPs. Thanks for the great question. You should get some funny answers.
267658
"holy guacamole!"\n\nby Robin The Boy Wonder
536174
"My World and Welcome To It!"  :o)\n\n"My Home on Earth"\n\n"Where I Live"\n\n\nHope this helps!\nSue
475779
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic and so am I. -- Bill Murray (What about Bob)\n\nAll I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work. -- Steve Martin (Bilko)\n\nHarry: Nice skis.\nGirl: Thanks.\nHarry: They yours?\nGirl: yep.\nHarry: Both of them?\nGirl: yeah...\nHarry: cool! "Dumb and dumber"\n\nDr. Rumack: Can you fly this plane and land it?\nTed Striker: Surely you can't be serious.\nDr. Rumack: I am serious, and don't call me Shirley.\n\n"Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffin' glue!"\n\n"He has a drinking problem."\n\n"There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?" "AIRPLANE"
221972
hmmm...good one.  From Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory I like, "If God intended us to walk, he wouldn't have invented roller skates."\n\nFrom Charlie and the Chocolate Factory I like, "Everything in this room is eat-able.  Even I am eat-able but that would be canabalism and is frowned on in most societies."
642531
story from the little box:-\n\nIt's meaningful....\n\nOnce upon a time, there was a teacher and his student\nlying down under a big tree near a big grass area.\nThen, suddenly, the student asked the teacher,\n\nStudent : Teacher, I'm confused, how can we find our soul-mate?\nCould you please help me?\n\nTeacher : (Silent for few second, than he answered)\n\nWell, it's a pretty hard and easy question.\n\nStudent : (Thinking hard) Huh???\n\nTeacher : Look on that way, there are a lot of grass\nthere, why don't you walk there but please never walk\nbackward, just walk straight ahead. On your way, try\nto find a beautiful grass and pick it up then give it to me. But just one.\n\nStudent : Well, ok then... wait for me... (walked straight ahead to the grass field).\n\nA few minutes later...\n\nStudent : I'm back.\n\nTeacher : Em, well I don't see any beautiful grass on your hand\n\nStudent : On my journey, I found few beautiful grass,\nbut I thought that I would find a better one, so I didn't pick it up.\nBut I didn't realize that I'm at the end of the field, and I hadn't\npicked up any. Because you told me not to go back, so I didn't go\nback.\n\nTeacher : That's what happened in real life.\n\nWhat is the message of this story?\n\n* Grass - is people around you\n* Beautiful Grass - is people that attract you\n* Grass Field - is time\n* In looking for your soulmate, please don't always\ncompare and hope that there will be a better one. By\ndoing that, you'll waste your lifetime, cause remember..\n\n"Time Never Goes Back".\n\nIt applies the same in finding your ideal life\npartner, your suitable career or business, therefore\nthe morale is LOVE & grab hold of the opportunity\nthat you have now, don't waste time!
281412
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Some time in the middle of the night, Holmes wakes Watson up. "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce." \n\nWatson says: "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth; and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life." \n\nHolmes replies: "Watson, you idiot, somebody stole our tent!"
348621
30 seconds to mars is awsome\nand cameo nova rocks my socks off.
537903
I like # 3 - that quote will mean more and more to you as you get older.\n\nI particularly like this one:\n\nYesterday is history, tomorrow's a mystery, today is a gift.  That's why we call it the present.
198005
my quote that i have always used and "owned- :) " since high school is\n~Amor Vincit Omnia~\n\n---it means Love Conquers All, plus it sounds really cool and looks pretty when it is written.the end.\n\n\n---P.S.!!! --Don't even think about stealing it!!! It is mine only! :)
615912
"Wow it's hot in here!"\n\n"OH MY GOD A TALKING MUFFIN!"
630654
My mate likes to use cheesy chat up lines here is some of his favourites.\n\n     Hey Baby. I may not be Fred Flinstone but I'll sure make your bed rock\n   \n     Are you a parking ticket?\n-Why?\n    Because you've got fine written all over you.\n\n    Did you here the one about the polar bear and the iceberg?\n\nSad hey\n-No\n    Neither did I, but it broke the ice. Didn't it?\n\nAnd the ultimate worst one he uses is\n\n    I might be the ugliest guy in here but I'm the only one talking to you
330513
" the greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was to convince the world he didn't exist" - Usual Suspects\n\n"crucifixions a doddle!"  - Life of Brian
39041
My favorite is 'To Serve Man.' \nWhen I heard the line 'It's a cookbook!' I could not stop laughing. It was a great episode. \n\n"A race of aliens known as the Kanamits land on Earth and promise to be nothing but helpful to the cause of humanity. They eradicate hunger, eliminate war, and obliterate expensive power sources. All is not well, however, when a decoder discovers the Kanamits’ true intentions. Their book, To Serve Man, is actually a cookbook." wikipedia.org