I live in  Perth, Western Australia and have an 18yr old daughter who has been cutting herself for the past 2 or 3 years now...At times, she has also been drunk and taken a lot of pills, before harming herself...She also suffers from an eating disorder, which she says, is just another way of being 'in control' of herself and her life. This is a very difficult thing to have to deal with, both for my daughter and for myself and the rest of our family.  I've tried to find a professional person who I can talk to about her condition and in particular, someone who specializes in this area but to no avail...I'd like to have contact with other parents of teenagers who have this problem and who are also having to deal with similar issues as myself, such as, feelings of guilt, helplessness, fear etc: Please contact me if you are in a similar situation or if you know of anything that may be of help to us... concerned_mum
125521
I am not a parent of a child that self-harms..but if it is any consilation ..I used to be a child who did the "self-harming" ...if I can be of any help just let me know....
565124
I agree with Angelina. You need to speak to a counselor or therapist as soon as possible. If your parents won't take you or cannot afford it, at least find a teen support group.
82408
Honestly the only thing that can be done is to stay away from her, and if it becomes a real problem then someone should let her parents know, that is a really huge problem and that girl is going to end up really hurting herself in the long run, that needs to be put to a stop know.
324816
How can hurting yourself be the answer to anything? MY daughter did that for a while because her friends kept bring their problems to her and no teenager can handle another teens problems. I suggest you try to find an adult who can help you or maybe a professional. If you can't afford one they have places that don't cost you anything. I hope you don't cut yourself because you don't really want to hurt yourself I know it's a way of getting the pain out but there are other ways like I said talk to someone who can really help you with your problems, maybe you could talk to God and he can help you through your rough times. I wish you luck with what ever you do.
297317
I suggest getting her into a rehabilition program there are great ones all over the country that deal with just eating disorders or have a speciality program from them.  The best way to help her is not to ask but give. You and your parents need to have a sit down with her. (An intervention) You all need to write down everything that you love about, what her best qualities are, and what you see happening to her. Also a good tacket is if telling her all that stuff doesn't work, have her lay down on the couch close her eyes and have her a "funeral" (I know it sounds bad,but it really does help) she is not aloud to talk. But you all come up to her say everything you love. And talk about how the disorder killed her and how it has affected you. Tell her what ended up happening to all of you after she died. Like for example you started failing in school and ended up with the same eating disorder she had. And mom started losing weight because she was so depressed she would forget, she lost her job because the boss couldn't handle her crying infront of clients. Dad was never home anymore because he couldn'e handle everything, he became an alcoholic. Their is constant fighting.  When she hears things like this it is going to hurt her and she should realize how she is hurting all of you.
508644
Please call a hotline right now. There are mental health hot lines. There are suicide hot lines. There are abuse hotlines.  Open your telephone book right now and look in the front. There are listings there for help and you need to call one of the numbers now. I don't know where you live but I know in Florida that if you have a mental problem and you cannot afford the medications, then some of the mental clinics and hospitals will give you the medications at little or no cost. My daughter has had mental problems all her life and the times when I could not afford her medications or blood tests, they provided them to me for as little as $3.00 per month. \n\nIf you were in a residential treatment facility, then whay aren't you on medicaide?  You could be on S.S.I disability and that would automatically get you the medicade. \n\nBut the important thing is to call and get help now.  In Florida there is a baker act law, it just means that if the courts or doctors or a family memb er ar friend, thinks that you are a danger to yourself or anyone else, then you are put in a facility until they can evaluate you and get you back on your medications. My daughter has been baker acted 9 times and only once by me and my husband. \n\nIf you can't find a mental health place tonight that will help you, then you should find out which hospital in your area has a psych unit and go to their emergancy room tonight. You are asking for help and here it is. Now GO.
320072
Well, for starters, Im not sure that cutting is a sin. The whole "your body is a temple" thing refers to what you put in your body and mind, like things you hear and see which are sinful, and so on. Just my interpretation, Im no expert. As for the act of cutting, I understand this disorder, a friend of mine in high school had it. It is a very dangerous disorder and if they  seriously have this disorder and arent doing it for attention you should offer to help them find a way to seek out help from a professional. You might be able to talk to your school counselor, or another trusted adult. Please seek out help, left untreated this disorder can lead to suicide.
456729
She needs to get help right away. I'm not sure how old she is and if she still lives with her parents. If she does, you have to make the difficult decision of telling them. They may not realize how seriously she is depressed. If she is an adult, it is hard to force someone to get help. If someone is about to commit suicide, then 911 can be called. Otherwise, you can encourage them to talk to their doctor, talk to a distress centre/suicide prevention line, talk to a counsellor or go to the emergency room of a hospital. Try to keep the lines of communication as open as you can. She needs to know that people care about her. With that said, if she does hurt herself that is not your fault. You are doing what you can. She is lucky to have a caring friend like you. I hope things work out really well.
609750
I am not sure how old or young you are but if you are old enough, you can say no to being hospitalized or have a parent/guardian say no if you aren't old enough. I know that our daughter over  4 years ago had problems when she was in 4th grade, and because at that time she was being extremely violent, and was then to go on to be diagnosed with bipolar, but she stayed one night in the emergency area. We then refused her to be hospitalized, and I stayed home with her and was with her 24 hours a day, 7 days a week until the medication kicked in and she was feeling better. She also went to a psychologist and still goes now and then, as it helps her to not only talk with us but to talk to a therapist. You have say over your own care, especially if you are at that moment of legal age, and of sound mind,etc. Good luck, just don't worry about it all, go and get the help you need! Just make sure you find yourself a good psychiatrist, referrals from friends, family members or call to your local hospital and they'll usually give you 3 names of psychiatrists. Take care of YOU!!!! You may also need a tranquilizer of some kind, and if you are continuing to have suicidal thoughts, sometimes having that major tranquilizer can calm you down until the antidepressants kick in. Please get help ASAP!!!
341076
it's self harm, and it is the same as cutting, self harm doesn't always mean cutting, it can be hitting biting, burning or anything like that there are a few sites for basic info but not very many that offer decent solutions, at least i haven't found them yet for my friend. I suggest beyond blue or sane austraila for information - actually sane austraila might be the most helpful, there is a section where you can ask questions and they are fairly helpful in their responses. mm the address is helpline@sane.org. best of luck
372957
Are you trying to stop? If so, congrats! That's a big first step to take =) Anyways...\n\nFirst, you should research the topic so that you have an idea of what you are dealing with, with some tips on how to deal with it, tell others, and such. It might give you some insight to why you hurt yourself as well. A sight that gives a basic description is  http://www.nmha.org/infoctr/factsheets/selfinjury.cfm  a good page with some links to other pages depending on what you need is http://teenadvice.about.com/od/cuttingbranding/  I would also suggest the site recoveryourlife.com  it is a site of self harmers, either who are trying to stop, have stopped and trying to keep from going back, or have stopped and want to help others quite. It's got a forum and a chat room. It is a very good site because it doesn't glorify or condone cutting (Such as saying things like "Cutting is awesome" or  "Do you know (celebrity name) cuts? that means its tight!"  or posting pics on the site for others to comment on and such. That doesn't mean the members aren't understand or cruel or whatever. They want to stop the problem, instead of encouraging it). \n\nA good thing to try is professional help. I got a counselor for my self harm issues, and he was understanding and helpful. Most councellors are not judgemental and do there best to help, though a few might not be able to help someone with self harm issues, just because they are not well trained in that area of psychology, but most are cool. He/she will help you uncover why you are hurting yourself, and try to stop the behavior. So i would suggest getting a counselor if possible, they can be a great help.\n\nAnother thing to do is to tell someone you love about this issue (if you haven't already). Self harming is a very hard thing to stop, much harder if you don't have someone helping you. Not trying to discourage you, it's just if you have someone helping and encouraging you along the way it is "easier" for you to quit. Tell someone you can trust and that won't judge you, and will listen to you. If you want to tell someone, here is a tip that will hopefully make it easier. (This is meant to be used in telling your parents, but it should work for anything really). You should write out a letter, explaining about the cutting, why you do it (if you know), some information about it (so that they can have an idea of what's going on), your point of view, etc... This allows you to get all of the things you want to get out out, so that you don't end up forgetting something if you tell someone straight forward. You can either give the letter to the person (or leave it somewhere they can find it), or use it as a guide to tell the person(s) directly. \n\nAlso, there are some tips to stop the urges to self harm. Here are a few:\n\n*Draw in red pen on the area where you usually cut yourself. *just ignore it and move on. ALL urges will pass in time, you just have to distract yourself until they do \n*Do something relaxing when you are stressed, take a warm bath, do a soduko, read a book, cross-stitch (that works for me) whatever makes you relax\n*Write in a journal how you feel when you want to hurt yourself, get your feelings out\n*Listen to music that either: 1. calms you down, makes you happy 2. music that talks about how you are feeling, like hurt, angry, etc... (be careful with this though, it could actually trigger you if you aren't careful)\n*Talk to anyone, not nessecarily about the cutting, just call up a friend to distract yourself.\n*Hit something (not yourself) like a pillow or something\n*Pray (if you are religious)\n*Just distract yourself in some way. The feelings will pass, you just need to give it time. \n\nThere are many more tips, but these are the ones i can think of off the top of my head. These are tips to deal with the feelings. Now some tips for the pain part. \n\n*Hold ice cubes in your hand. It gives you the pain
8584
Talk to a trusted adult or counselor. If you have to, call 911 and tell them you need some help fast. Please do get into rehab and also some one on one therapy to try to find better ways to deal with your problems rather than cutting yourself. Also, the front of your local yellow pages should have several mental health resources that could provide you with the help you need. This is a serious problem and I don't believe the only other answer you got was a smart-mouthed insensitive answer.
114644
I went through the same thing, it seems to be a semi-popular trend among teenage girls of this current generation. I helped my ex-girlfriend through her teen years, It was very difficult for me to convince her that she shouldn't kill herself. At one point one of her classmates found out she was cutting herself and she went to the mental hospital. There she learned new ways to hurt herself, how to hide it, how to poison herself. She started doing drugs and cutting herself even more, just to prove a point. While in the Mental Hospital she cut "Sl*T" over and over again onto her chest, covering her entire chest. Only by giving up all of my friends, giving up on my own highschool career and spending almost all my time with her, was I able to convince her that there was more in life.\n\nThat was three years ago, about a year ago she started to feel better and better about herself. She got rid of her old friends(who also are cutters, but good people too) and started hanging around with some spoiled preppy kids. She left me to date some rich brat, but I am just happy that I saved her life.\n\nThe problem comes down to the glorification that a sub-culture that exists places on it. There are websites dedicated to the "Beauty" of cutting and anorexia. This is what influenced my Ex to stop eating and start hurting herself. It destroyed my own life, but thats what friends do.\n\nI would say that the best thing you can do is stand by her side, no matter what happens. Try to help her realize that she is simply taking out her anger on herself instead of on the ones that hurt her. You should also try to get her away from that distructive enviorment as much as you can.\n\nI am suprised at how common and Idenical this problem is, girls who have abusive(verbally or otherwise) family members and are depressed seem to think that cutting themselves will help. I understand the ideas behind it, if I do this to myself it makes them even worse of a person for what they did.\n\nIt is a long and difficult path your friend has ahead of her, and if you choose to help her, it will be difficult for you as well. The only thing I can say is, no matter how much she doubts it, things always get better, its just the truth.
585620
First of all, what are you doing relying on your parents if you have teenage daughters??  By all means I was not a perfect child but, bu time I was your childrens age, I didn't rely on my parents for squat except for a roof over my head and food.  Stop exausting your efforts on relying on other people and asking for help over the internet and rely in yourself.  If you want a job, there are plenty of them out there...  I lived in Santa Barbara so don't tell me there isn't.  See what "truth"?  What does this mean?  Call me your "angel" and I've heard your "cry", only it sounds more like excuses and moaning.  Stop blaming others for your problems and make some changed in your lives.  Where are your daughters?  Living in the street too?  Don't you think there is something wrong when you bear children and aren't able to take care of them properly.  Hell, I may not know anything about this, I'm only 24 years old...  I know shit happens and I feel for your perdiciment but, you need to make soemthing for yourselves, it's out there, you just have to find it and want it bad enough.  Good luck and God Bless.
586610
Call the police and tell them the story.  They have to go to her home, make sure u mention shes intending to harm herself.  They have to come out. If she is under 18 call Child protection Service and she can be removed from home.  Or if u are able to kidnap her and take her to the ER.  (use to work in one and u would be surprise how many are brought in for suicidal tenancies) They have to treat her.  They can not refuse to take her in.  And ask UR parents for help.  U might be surprise what ur parents could do for as well.  (well I hope they are like my parents willing to step in for a ur friends)
115487
Listen, this is very serious. I'm a counselor, and your friend is in real danger of hurting herself. Take her very seriously. You are too young to handle  this. You need to talk to someone you trust, whether it be your parents or another adult. I'm sorry if I'm scaring you. There are counselors who can help her. There are suicide hot lines.Look in the phonebook. There should be a listing in the front under emergency services. The burden of this needs to be put in the hands of an adult. A part of what makes this serious is the Moms abuse issues. Your friend has probably been exposed to this all her life in some form or another. Who ever you choose to help, hopefully your parents, will talk to you, and guide you. Answer me back when you can. I'll look for your message. Use the heading, I found an adult to help. Good luck honey.
408424
She needs HELP so , how can you assist her BE HONEST with her about what you feel she is doing to herself , then guide her to some professional or talk about why she is mutilating herself, maybe abusing going on from within family ???