Me and my ex had been together for 3 1/2 years. We are 18 and about to graduate. We were so in love and talked about marriage and he was planning on going to cancun with us for graduation. He paid 400 dollars towards it. Last wednesday he broke up with me and said he wants to test the waters. He has only been with me;sex,kiss,love,everything has only been with me. That fallowing sunday I finally called him and asked him to come talk to me. He came over and we started talking. He told me he loves me he thinks but he wants to make sure. Then the next day we were texting and I asked him if he wants me to find someone else and he said yeas so then I said "so obviously it is over for good for ever" and he said "why would you say that" his friends say he loves me he just knows that marraige is a possibility and he wants to make sure I am it. After that I tried texting and calling him and he wont return either one. I want him back what do i do?
133803
Let him go.  It sounds like he is running scared. If he really wants you, he will be back. In the meantime, move on. There are other fish in the sea. You deserve the best.  IN the meantime, enjoy.
128741
You need to know some things before you try to get him back.\n\n1. why did he leave?  Did he leave because you don't put out and this tramp does?  If that is the case, I agree with the rest, don't bother.  If he left because of a fight/misunderstanding then i think you might want to try.  People have fights and then will do almost anything to win, so things might have been said, that neither of you meant.\n\n2. Why is he with her.  Is she like you, apart from the trampyness?  Is she the opposite of you?  Depending on your sex life with him, he may just be on a bootycall.  Doesn't make it right.  But if she is just like you, he might want you back.\n\n3. Why do you want him back?  how old are you? how long have you been dating?  What have you done together (meaning go to college, school, other?)  Maybe he was just serving his purpose for those times but wont work with these times.  We are all human and we have all done that.\n\nSo if you want him back, how bad?\nif you need him back you got to tell him and sex him up.  (If that is the only way, i say leave him)\n\nIf you love him, but still lead a life of your own, then tell him you need him and tell him you are sorry for what happened.\n\nfinally, if you are stil pissed at him and don't care if he comes back or not (but would like him back) then just say hey we need to talk and make sure he knows everything about how you feel and ask him why he did it.
190704
You have to decide if you really want to be with him or not.\nI'm not sure what the reasons were for the break up but you have to sit down and really look at all of the pros and cons of getting back together.\n\nIf you decide that he is worth it then get together and talk. But, this does not mean that he is willing to get back together with you.  If he is just being a jerk and flirting with you but acts differently around others then you should really stop and think - Maybe not worth it.\n\nIf you do find out that he does not want you, well don't take it bad at all.  This is your chance to move on and find that super special someone that you deserve.  Don't waste your time and emotions.\n\nLive your life without him and just maybe he will see this new independence and change his mind.  Let him be the one to realize what he lost.
286056
Well if you had broken up, then its really none of his business what you get upto... behind his back, or right in front of him. Pity that he did actually want you back, you might have blown your chances here...\nSit down and have a chat with him, explain the situation to him, how you saw it, and listen as he tells you his side of the story... Good luck.
256709
look ..i'm in the same setuation as you r ...my ex said he not ready ..so we broke up. And i'm not the kind of girl who give up on everything and trying to get what i want but i just relise what is the point of tryting to get someone who doesn't want me. so i think i should be happy with single life and i don't need them to make me happy. But i love him so i give him what he want ..he want to be friends and i friends with him and he don't want me to hate him and angry ..so i don't and i just trying to be cooling off and i don't show him how much i need him and i told him i'm happy and give him his need but at the same time i'm making my self happy and enjoy my life without him...who know, i believe their is someone out there is waiting for you and me ...and i know i will be inlove again and so do u...but if he want to come back let him be and if he don't just set him free as he wish ...\n\nRemember if u trying to make ur self happy and if you happy life is good ...this is just a part of life ..let them go ...
319833
no i wouldnt accept it and yes he will think you want him back!\n\nhe is you ex, u dont have to spend a thing on him! if he wants a phone let him buy it himself!!!!\n\nbuy him a beer if u see him out (if he is old enough to drink)\n\nother than that, keep your money in your pocket!
116177
I don't think you have true love there or his love. If he loved you then he would speak up or for you. Time to move on and find some one else that will.
59724
he is in a comfort zone. What about you, what do you want? Think about why you broke up..Is he worth it, or can you do better than the way he treats you. Is this what you want for your future or are you just settling in your comfort zone. If he is the man you want, than just ask him, and if it is not the answer you are looking for.....move on
545977
He probably didn't want the akwardness of the situation....plus if he is your EX why would you stop to talk to him while you have your boyfriend with you, and he has his FIANCEE with him?  Its understandable if you guys still keep in touch but there is no need to cause drama with someone he is willing to Marry and possibly start a family with.  My advice would be to forget about him and move on, Im sure thats what your boyfriend and your Ex's Fiancee would like as well!  And if you see him again just smile and keep walking!
399742
He told you how he felt. You cant change or control him and thats what your trying to do. He was honest with you cuz you asked him to be. Theres nothing more to it, you are now broken up and have been so theres no more relationship. He doesnt have to answer to you for anything. He has every right to have a date if he wants just as you do. You are trying to control something beyond the break up and all that will do is prolong any hurt for YOU, not him. Move on and forget the friends thing for now. Maybe down the road but now you need to let go of it all.
261910
Perhaps he realizes that he's losing his control over you and you are interested in someone else.  Follow your heart, was the reason for the break up valid?  Is it still valid?  Was it silly and stupid?  If any of those apply then he is where he needs to be, a ex.   Guys are funny, they think that they don't want you, and don't, till they see you with someone else, like your life stops because you was with them.
85431
He has to want to get back with you.  His reasons for not wanting to be with you may not be in your control.  The best thing you can do is to make your life something wonderful and hope that he realizes what he has lost and wants to be a part of it.
625396
I think that he is using you.... move on and find someone that you deserve, someone who will apprciate your honesty and committment. Based on what you wrote, this guy comes with xtras that you don't need to deal with.
368174
Sounds like he's playing games with you. I wouldn't be so quick to take him back and see what he does then. I think he knows that you will take him back and that is why he is doing this. Guys will do what you let them.  Put a stop to it and let him wait it out, or just let him go. You don't need your emotions messed with like that.
638113
I would see where things lead. And if it end up that you two break up for awhile it will be okay. I am going through a break-up right now. My ex did it because he needed time to himself to figure himself out, that sort of thing. He still loves me.\n\nMove on with your life. Moving on doesn't mean that you don't still love him or that you might not get back together one day, it just means that you're moving on. You can't waste your life waiting on someone who doesn't know what they want.\n\nI wish you the best and remember if you're supposed to be with him you will be.
318254
Angel, sorry to hear this. Your world's pretty shaken up right now.\n\nI've had one experience with this -- my second gf (I was in high school) went to Hawaii for two weeks, and when she came back, she dumped me. The experiences with some other guys out there (nothing sexual) made her see all the problems with our relationship and what she hadn't yet experienced, since I was her first bf. So she realized she wasn't ready to commit yet.\n\nI'm sorry to agree with you; but if I had to guess, his lack of communication and his anger says to me that he has fallen for someone else while out there; whether serious or not, it's made him rethink his commitment to marriage to you; and these are his ways of distancing himself from you, in order to make it easier for him to break things off. \n\nThe clincher is that he now has told you he plans to move out on his return. That's huge -- and he decided it so quickly and from so far away. Things do not look good.\n\nThere's not much you can do to "change" his heart, all you can do is talk to him, try to understand what he experienced out there and why he's acting this way now, find out whether there are/were things you could have changed that might have helped him make a stronger commitment to you, and show him you love him regardless of whether he stays with you.\n\nGentle (and not forced) talking is the only way you'll get to the heart of things. Make it safe for him to explain himself, for your peace of mind. You need to know it was him and not you that caused this.\n\nAnyway, for what it's worth, I'm sorry. That's rough.
573951
He is taking advantage of his freedom and figuring things out.  Stop stressing about him and enjoy the other things you have in your life.  Not that that's easy though... There is always the chance that he might come back... but why do you want to be with a guy who broke up with you?  So that he can do it again later on down the road?  I think you should work on moving on... don't wait around for a guy that is probably sleeping around right now.