My best friend and i have been inseprible for over 10 years now. She all of a sudden started pushing me away and not letting me go anywhere near her. she told me she hated me and never wanted to see me again. \nThis hurt so much, and i was lost without her. she said so many hateful things to me, and i returned the favour to her. well after 1 month of not talking her mum called me and told me she was in the hospital and really really sick.\n\nI went to the hospital and found she has cancer and wouldn't be alive much longer, she could barely talk. she told me that she pushed me away because she wanted me to get used to her not being there before she had to leave. She died the next day...\n\nShe was like a sister to me, and now I'll never get to see her again, why couldn't she just tell me, i feel so guilty about the things i said to her, how can i feel better about it? i just wish i could say sorry...
128429
first of all, your friend was trying to protect you.  When things go wrong like that we as humans always seem to hurt the ones we love and those closest to us. maybe she was trying to safe you the pain and anguish of having to watch her die.and I am sure she was scared, both of dying and of how you might react.  It is always hard when a life ends with unfinished busines like this. I am sure if you knew the facts, then you would not have said these things to her, but i am sure she will forgive you.  WHen you went to the hospital did you tell her you did not mean what was said, as I am sure she appologised as well.  Only thing that can help is yourself, you have to accept that this was not under normal circumstances that this happened, and your friend did start by saying hurtful things to you.  People deal with things differently in life and this was her way off dealing with things.\n\nBest advice I can give is for you to give it time, and if time is not the answer then find someone who you can talk to, a friend, doctor or a councilor.  Try going to her grave and talk to her tell her you are sorry.  Perhaps you can raise funds in her name for the cancer unit at the local hospital as away of easing the burden.  If you are a believer in psychics and mediums, then they can help you con5tact her or pass on a message.  my e mail address if you need to chat is trishaf2001@yahoo.co.uk drop me a line f you want and we can go to msn and chat there  hope this helps.  just remember the good times \n\ngood luck
402004
Listen your Friends just don't understand your condition, they are young and don't understand what you are going through , I know what you mean when you say about not wanting to be here have you told you doctor how you feel?\nI have felt the same way  just wanting to cruel up and died, you need help see your doctor about a good counnsellor, But the good thing is you can get over this i had Deppression ,Anxiety attacks, Panic attacks there was a time i would not even step out side the front door so i do know how you feel. \nHang in there and get yourself some good help, don't wrong about your friends just you concentrate on getting better \nand if you want a really good friend there is one who really loves you \nand that is Jesus \nMay God bless you
85616
I had the same problem. my friend of 6 years kept getting really jealous over my friend of just 2 months. Every time she came close my friend would jump in and pull me away. Not only that she was very close knit. I mean when ever she introduced me to someone she would say "MY BEST FRIEND". It got a little annoying when she wanted me to do the same. It got really bad when she started to make fun of my other friend. That's when I told her, hey listen, you have been my best friend so all these years. And if you think that she is going to steal me away from you, then you must not trust me enough, do you really think i am going to drop you after so many years together? I told her that if i wanted to stop being her friend I would have stopped, but I'm still here. I think you should just tell it to her straight, and if she doesn't believe you, that's her fault.
413009
Maybe it is time for you or one of your Brothers to go visiting with Mom and Sis. I think it sounds like there needs to be more communication between you siblings.\nDoes your sister have anyone that relieves her ever? Is she stuck there 24/7, 365 days a year?\nDon't get me wrong, I love my Mother but she came to visit me for a month and I was so ready for her to leave. She is in good health but she lives in the past. She tells the same stories over and over to the point that I had them memorized myself. \nMaybe it is time for your sister to take a long break, since she is verbally abusive to your Mom. She might be feeling that she is entitle to any money because of the time that she has put in.\nSomeone with suicidal tendencies shouldn't be in charge of any one else, little lone a person in ill health.
109026
I don't think there are any words or anything anyone can say that will make this better for you and your friends family.  Acts like this are absolutely senseless!  Hatred is never easy to understand or make sense of and in this case it is senseless.  Just hold your friends memory in your heart and he will always be alive for you.  Continue on with the good you were doing, that can be the best legacy for the bad in this case.  I will be thinking of you.
539103
i totally sympathise with you and know how you feel...at the age of 14 i was diagnosed with aneroxia, depression and i sef-harmed (i still have some scars now...3 years later)- i was in denial about all these things but then one day i cracked and realised i needed help....i sat down with my parents and explained EVERYTHING....about what i was doing to my body....how i was feeling inside....and how i came close to taking a overdose.....i was referred to a psychiatrist and was admitted in to a psychiatric hospital for 6 months...im not trying to scare you and tell you thats where your going to end up because mine weren't just about the self-harming but what i will say is that you need to sit down with your parents..tell them not to speak because there is something you need to get of your chest and just get them to listen.....as for you saying that your mum was angry when she saw your cuts...it isnt an anger for example....if you damaged someones property....but an anger that is brought on by being worried, scared, feel like they cant help e.t.c...and probably why you never went to them for help...once your parents get an idea (i wont so understand because no one can ever understand unless they are going through it or has been through it) of what your feeling then get them to take the right steps forward to getting you psychiatric help and counselling....but DONT keep this to yourself.....im not saying its a 2 minute job to fix because even after i came out of hospital after being in there for 6 months i carried on self-harming but i still got to see a cousellor and psychiatrist twice a week.....now 3 years later i no longer self-harm but carry the scars with me.....i wish you much luck
80357
I stopped talking to my best friend for the first 18 years of my life becaue her emotional problems were getting so bad I coulnd't deal with it anymore. She wasn't fun anymore. Yet I miss her sometimes terribly.\nI moved out of town and we stopped talking. When I went back to my hometown 20 years later and drove past her house there she was going inside and I just kept driving. We considered ourselves sisters.\nSometimes you just have to make the break.\nYou need to tell her you need some time to yourself.\nAnd not feel guilty.\nTell her you can't keep driving her around and if she won't get her license you can't help her anymore. You will be doing her a big favor. \nTell her she needs to be independent from you. Tell her your tired and worn out and can't help her any more. It won't stop until you tell her.\nEither that or just move to another town.
670714
Sounds Like you have already lost your Best Friend.\n\nI would at least write her a letter and let her know your feelings and that since she has decided to go this route, that you will be taking another one of your own.  Maybe she is a control freak..  I do wish you the best.\n\nAlso, Please learn how to properly type in here.  It does make reading the question very difficult, and it is against the rules here.   (Not in English rule)
55573
i would talk to her about the situation and see why she has changed.  you can't ignore it, especially if you guys were the bestest of friends.  i mean i would want to know if my friend didn't want to hang out with me anymore, i think i would deserve some sort of explanation.
366688
Be the ideal BF, along with her best friend!  I know how this feels, I lost my g-ma and her wake was on the day of my b-day every since life sucks and this girl is lucky to have you!  I lost the best person ever when I was diagnosed w/ depression and bi-polar manina and I have no one now. So be there for ever and always don't hang on to tight but don't let her float away.\nI contplait sucided every day and if only I had someone like you it probable wouldn't seem as bad.  Stay with her NEVER GIVE UP ON HER! My bf was ashmed of my problems and so he dumped me and that made me HIT ROCK BOTTOM..........HARD! So thanks for being there for her and please stick with her!\nSpeech # 5                                                 Alison Sterbenz\nInformative/Persuasive                                                     November 14, 2006\nStory Telling\n\nHi my name is Alison Sterbenz.  I’m here to tell you a story about something that happened to me as well as the lessons that I’ve learned from it.\nAfter an aquaward day with my whole family being kind of jumpy and specious acting, there was a knock at the door.  I proceeded to head up the stairs until I looked to see who was at the door.  I looked and it was a sheriff and a lady I’ve never seen before.  I don’t know why but my instinct was to cry, so I started crying.  My mom opened the door and stepped a side and mentioned them to come in/ a look.  I didn’t have a clue what was going on.   The sheriff said, “Alice Sterbenz?” and I say, “Yes, Sir!”  The sheriff replied, “I’m afraid you have to come with us.”  I ask, “Why?” and the sheriff served me with some papers.  I said, “Well I guess I’ll get some shoes.“ and I started going upstairs and the lady said, “I’m sorry we have to follow you so you don’t try to harm yourself.”  I say, “I don’t care!”  I went upstairs to get my shoes and both the sheriff and the lady were there I went down stairs they were still right behind me.  The lady says “Would you like to bring something with you like a picture or something?”  I look on the entertainment stand and grab a wallet sized photo of my boyfriend.” I stared to cry and said, “I’ve got to call Roger, and I‘ve got to call him RIGHT NOW!”  The sheriff says, “We got to go can you use a cell phone or something?”  I grabbed my cell phone and the sheriff asked my mom if it was ok for me to take the phone.   My mom replied by,” It’s her phone she can take it if she wishes.“  The sheriff asked me if I was going to cause any problems as he took the handcuffs from his loop on his side.  \nPage 1\nI told him “No sir!”  I was so scared we walked out to the sheriff car parked in front of my house.  My dogs were barking up a storm, I was crying and confused, I didn’t know what to do.  \nI was so shaky and frightened.  Once we got into the car I called Roger, my boyfriend, and he said just kept saying, “Alice it’s going to be ok, it’s going to be ok.”  I was trying to believe him but as I was balling it was truly difficult to believe him.  He ended up mentioning something to me that he had talked to my mom and she thought about doing this.  I got so angry and started yelling at him and told him I had to call my mom.  I called my mom and I started yelling, I hate you, I hate you, why did your do this!”  I told her that I hated her and a lot of other things I didn’t really mean, but I was so, so scared, and I was very upset, I guess I didn’t really know what to think or do.  The sheriff drove the lady and I, to the police station in Maquoketa and then put me into another sheriff car where the lady was going to drive me where ever I was suppose to be going.  The lady took me and put me in the other car but not before asking me if I was going to be any trouble.  I told the lady “No maim!”  I talked to Roger more in the car until I started yelling at him, then the lady told me I should get off the pho
259243
Hi,\n I'm sorry to hear about your mother, i would said pray and ask God what to do next. i would find people to talk with, sometime it help to have other listen to how you feel do you have other family member there. talk with them about your mom, and remember she is away there in your heart, she is looking over you.e-mail me anytime, florencewhittaker@yahoo.com
632430
People always have some kind of situation like this.  Well I don't understand why your mother and brother would insult her in any way, but that is something that a best friend would not want to here from their best friend's family.  If it hurts you that you feel as if your best friend is not considering you their best friend anymore, speak to them and tell them the complete truth.  Hang around other friends too, and try to get close to them also.  As time goes by people change, but you can't make another person feel the way you do.
636307
Your best friend doesn't have to care as long as she is a good listerner. That is the main thing. Alot of times you just need to talk. If she is atleast listening....then that is really what you needed aways. Does she help you when you really need it. Can you call her anytime to just talk? Can she call you anytime to just talk. Is it just one sided. Are you there for her every-time she needs something? Does she ever need you and you don't help? Good friends will help you kill someone...Best friends will help you bury them..LOL (only joking) Really ask yourself why you are asking this question,,. It may be because this friendship is one sided. Or  it may be because she has other friends that you are jealous of. I know that doesn't sound good. But, hey it happens..I had what I thought was a best friend. She would help me with anything. Then she moved on...I was hurt and jealous. .She is still a friend. but, I found out she could only have one real best friend at a time..She moves on about every 4 years. She has been through about 6 now. We hardly ever see each other now days.  (Almost Forgotten)
206281
Make sure you tell her you deserve an explanation for her distance. This is important. You have the right to know why she no longer wishes to be a part of your life. Just pull her to the side nicely or if you can catch her alone even better and just be like, "Hey, I've noticed you've been distant lately, is there anything wrong...did I do something to upset you?" Then if she doesn't wanna talk or explain herself, tell her "I deserve an explanation and I'll only try this once if your gonna give me the cold shoulder. I care about you enough to address the situation, but if you don't wanna be my friend anymore, at least have the decency to inform me like a woman". After this. just do what's in your heart. Go your separate ways and look into other options in friends. Someone is out there in the same boat as you and you'll find a new BFF soon. Good Luck!
206764
well what you did was not easy  i too have done it but it want just your life that is suffering the life everyone thought they had is now turned up side down and the easiest way out is to blame you. I am so sorry this happen to you  but good for you that you  are not the victim anymore and your family will come around in time but the words we say be it what you say to them or what they say to you will remain as the biggest scar\nyou keep living your live with your head held high and dont think for a minute it was your fault. i would like to have contact information with you so i can discuss this farther i can really help .I will keep you in prayer and your family. i dont know if they will let me post it but it is JLSJSTEPHENS@YAHOO>COM
430501
I, too have drifted away from friends I know since childhood. The best thing to do is have a peer mediation. Sounds totally, dorky, right?  Talk to her privately, so no one get embarrassed and tell her your honest feelings. i know it may be hard at first, but trust me, once you get going, it'll be easier. Set up some rules, like no interruptions, and let her talk. Tell her she's been hurting you, and that she's too bossy! don't raise your voice or tell her you hate her though. =P LET HER TALK TOO! Maybe she's been going through something. when my friends and I did this, I let them talk also. WE all ended on the floor bawling, but it was GOOD. I felt...RELIEVED. My friends and I are A LOT happier, and now, we know to talk BEFORE we blow up. Let her say what she needs too, but IF SHE starts getting aggressive, or rude-WALK AWAY. You don't deserve that. Maybe your friendship can be salvaged, most likely no, but at least you won't end the friendship on bad terms. Tell her that this is what's best for both of you, and you know longer desire her he company. Be the better person and walk away if things get ugly.\nGod bless, hun!
420802
This is what she is affraid of. You are her best friend and she can't even talk to you because you haven't talked to her in almost a week. You just proved her point for her.My husband is my best friend. And back when he was just my best friend he told me that he thought we should try going out. We aready were going everywere together anyway. I turned him down also for the same reason I was afraid I would lose my best friend. Do you know what changed my mind. He looked at me and said o.k. can't blame me for trying. Now come out side and help me do the tune up on my car. By doing that by letting me see that he wasn't going to start acting wierd towards me. By just continuing to be himself around me. I realized that their wasn't anything to be scared of because my best friend would be there in this relationship with me.