my boyfriend and i have been through alot since we have gotten together 2 yrs ago and have no real good memories,now all we do is fight and its getting worse we just had a baby together and im just like a walking dead person,i dont no which way to go, out the door r stay and hope for the best i have failed at most things ive done in my life and dont want to fail again but it looks like im going to.how do you get through this without feeling any worse than i already do?
122562
If you have nothing good coming from this relationship, why do you bother staying?\n\nDo you love him?\n\nIf you don't love him. and he doesn't love you perhaps you should find someone else.\n\nThis isn't considered failing if you leave. If you don't feel this relationship is working out. Leave. If anything, you'd be helping yourself.
607016
i think we have the same problem. i'm sorry it happened that way but im sure trying to work things out is easiest by talking things over and doing wat is best for BOTH of you.\nGOOD LUCK!
591881
Its really fun....I'm going through the same thing myself...my girlfriend of 2 yrs called it off 3 days ago and I'm suck in the same predicament. I absolutely can relate to you because I'm afraid that I won't ever find someone that I care and love. Not to mention she was my first girlfriend. To make it worse she tells me that she doesn't really see a future with me even though she tells me she loves me. Anyways I just want to tell you that its ok and hopefully both of us will be ok in the future. I wish you luck and I feel your pain. Oh, and the Dr. Steve answer is not fair... I'm not a teenager and I'm going through this so to say that "its a meaningless relationship" is cruel.
595155
I wish that I could tell you a wonderful answer where everything will be great, BUT I know how you feel, I was an abused child and married when I had just turned 17.  Well he started reminding me of my Mother before long.  I had no family, no one but his family as my friends, I had no place to go, so I stayed, It became very clear that he didn't love me, but I was so afraid.  But after 19 years I packed up and left, scared out of my mind, but you know what even though it was hard, lonely, I learned so much about myself, most of all I learned that life is to short to spend it with someone that makes you so sad, and doesn't treat you like a lover, friend or partner but more like something that they bought and paid for like an old car, then it is time to build a life that can be happier than you could ever imagine.  Even small things can make you smile or just laugh out loud especially when you have always been controled or felt like you were going to get in trouble for.  Like I would leave the bed unmade, didn't have to cook, and on Sat. morning I would lay in bed until 2 if that is what I wanted to do.  And I will tell you when you can go and come when you please and you don't have to answer to anyone but yourself, you too may find that life can be happy and full of good, instead of a life filled  with mostly bad and a little good every now and then.  Please take it from a woman that has been there no one can do this for you but you.  And somethings are so worth the risk.  And remember this, I had a friend one time tell me how stong I was, when I said no I am weak, she said look at what you have already been through, anything else should be a breeze.
565273
oh, sweetie, I am so sorry you are going through such a rough time! Is there anyone you can talk to? If not, find a counselor or someone you can trust, because it sounds like you need a good shoulder to cry on. Sometimes, you just have to hold your head up and live for better days, because it feels like there is nothing to hold on to anymore. But things get better, and soon you may find new people and new dreams that are even better than before, as hard as that is to imagine now. Or maybe your old dreams aren't as broken as they seem. There have been times I have lived for nothing but HOPE that someday things will get better. And they DID!!! Don't give up. I hope you find some comfort and peace that you need.
567043
You have your memories, and your experiences.  Try to work on having meaningful, commited relationships with people.  Be there for them in good and bad times.
335969
i know what you feeling, i went through a kind of depression when the man i thought loved me decided it wasnt what he wanted. i was devastated and didnt want to go on with my life. it took time but eventually i got angry after being so upset and heartbroken, i also had the help of a good friend who allowed me to yell and scream at them to get it out of my system.  it took me a good three or four months to move on with my life. its not that easy to do. when you are promised a life together then it ends up to be nothing, its hard to get over. allow yourself time to get angry, you have every right too feel the way you do.  i wont lie and say it will be easy because it wont be. good luck and hope you move on like did. you deserve better.
301591
although i wasn't abused as a child, i had a terrible experience when i was a teenager, i was date raped. i understand what you're going through and i know it hurts alot but you need to find the strength to move on with your life. anger and hate won't take you anywhere, it'll just make you bitter and it won't give you peace. i know what i'm talking about cuz i too dwelled on with my past for the longest time and i almost ruined my life. \ndon't worry though, better days is just around the corner, you just have to hold on and work on to getting well again my friend.\ni'll pray for your recovery!\nGod speed\n\np.s.\ntry to read this book: your past does not define your future by bo sanchez (this book is published in the philippines). this book has really helped me alot.
557606
Sometimes life give people bad turns.  All we can do is try to learn from and understand what is happening and why it is happening.  Just remember that with some time things will get better.  They always do.  It sounds like you are in a hole.  Just dig yourself out of it.  When you do, you can look back and see what you came through and then you will be able to use what you have learned to encourage someone else.\n\nTrust me...I am going through something very difficult right now, but I know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  Sometimes I get very sad and angry and all that, but I am just trying to tunnel my through with the hopes that things will get better.  I believe they will.\n\nIf you want to talk, send me an email.
98195
I have been there...not exactly in the same circumstances but at 19 My relationship finished and i know the pain you are going through, i really do..it hurts so so much and you feel that there is nothing left for you...i am now ten years older and since my split up with that boyfriend, when i was 19, i have done so much with my life..much more than i would ever have done if i had stayed with him...i have more friends now...have had lots more boyfriend...have had an excellent time... going on girly holidays...travelling...meeting new people...i sometimes wish i could go back in time and tell my 19 year old self how wonderful my life was going to be...I can't do that but i can guarentee that your life will get better and better... you will get to know yourself better, you'll do different things, you'll get excited when you have a crush on some one new...believe me, it will happen i never thought it would when we first split up but i then went on to fancying someone different nearly every month...it was great fun. I am all settled down living with a boyfriend now, all grown up..but i look back on that time and smile..it was great...it will be hard for you but look to the future...don't let him string you along... get yourself dressed and go out with some friends...be with people you like. Life is great, you can make it great with out him. Hope this helps xxx
605735
hi sweetie, first i want to tell you that i am so sorry, i really do understand sometimes i think death is easier, i went through this myself a few years ago, and it was so hard. but, you know a friend told me something that really hit home, she said as long as you are both alive there is a chance that you could get back together. simple but so true, never think for a minute that she has forgotten you, how could she each time she sees your baby , she sees you, each time she passes a special place or hears a song, she thinks of you. she only needs some time to grow and think, and maybe things will be better than they have ever been if you get back together. take this time to do some things for yourself, let her miss you and wonder where you are and who you may be with, use this time to better yourself, just give her some time and force yourself to get out there and do things as long as she knows you are waiting for her , she will take her time, but the minunit someone sees you with another woman an tells her, it will freak her out! good luck and GOD BLESS.
526919
Yes, my past comes and bites me in the ass all the time...some days I wish I could have a "do over"..so I could make better choices...I know youre not feeling sorry for yourself, it's just so frustrating sometimes...like you want to scream"I'm Sorry, I'm trying my best, I'm not the same person !" Hang in there and keep making good choices and doing the right thing now...
239794
I am in the same boat as you.  Trying to figure it out.  What cannot be cured must be endured.  Keep strong.  Looking at your life without that other person there feels so empty and cold.
143474
you have had it hard and i feel bad for you because it is something that no matter how hard you try it seems to get sadder ans sadder  but the thing that helps the most is time it may seem like it is impossible but time will heal look up to god just think about that they are in a better place NOW no more pain no more trouble and no more sickness they are in the best place they can be and maybe some day you can be with them times may be hard just hold on it will get better
77313
first off pray,an then remember this life is no joke but it is something that you only have one of,try to always keep your head held high an your mind open that hey things are bad but they could be worse,an if things are worse you have to be strong you just have to put your self around positive things,loved ones an have someone you can talk to.If there is family members,a friend or someone you can talk.Have something or someone that is positive around.No matter what life throws at you a break up with someone special,death,drugs,or whatever always remember there is always life ahead of you an you can make it.Be strong an remember that you are in control an you can do this.Remember put all the negative things behind you are to the side even an put positive things in your life.Because there is always tomorrow,an there is love out there do not ever give up.because you are a strong person do not ever forget that,no matter what has happen or will happen. no matter what you have an will always be strong. because it takes strength to do what you did [ask for help]it takes a lot for someone to reach out to someone for advise.
46959
Just keep going. Have you ever heard "This to shall pass".  You have to pray and ask God for strength to with stand lifes challenges.  We are here until God take us home and we are here for a reason. God just wants you to stick it out.  It will be okay. You can't do anything about the past and unless you intentionally did something wrong (meaning planned it out), than thats just life. We were not promise that life would be peachy. Challenges, heart aches and pain are apart of life. Take care and GOD BLESS
202355
I am the same way that you are, the guy I am with is the one for me as well, and we also have a baby on the way. But my jealousy and Insecurity did kind of hurt us, because things are not the same right now, and we are both trying to get back to the way we were, because we both really love each other, and do not want to lose one another, plus we want to because of the baby. I had to learn the hard way to not be that way, because he would never do anything to hurt me. So the best advice I can give you, is just dont let your jealousy get in the way, I mean it isnt going to go away, just dont let it get the best of you, because he will either change (not for the good), or he will end up leaving you. I had a bad past too, and this guy I am with is PERFECT for me, so just try your hardest to let go of your past, and tell yourself that this is your present, and can also be your future if you just let all the bad stuff go. Trust me, I do not wanna be the jealous type anymore either, but it is just something that is hard to get rid of. If he has been able to handle it this long, then he is a great guy, my boyfriend put up with it for a LONG time, but theres only so much one guy can take, so please stop while you are ahead. I hope this helps some.