It seems no matter what I do I seem to pick the wrong guy. I'm a grown woman and I know what I want. Just so you know I am not one who just sleeps around I have more respect for myself than that but, If I sleep with guy he don't call back so I know that's all he wanted but on the other hand when I don't sleep with him he doesn't call. I met this guy and didn't sleep with him for awhile then when we did it was so awesome and we really like eachother. Now the only time I do see him is when we have sex.\nBefore we ever got involved like this we both agreed we were not looking for a realationship but I really care about him. \nwhat do I do. Do I back off and not call him and wait for him. Do I keep on dating even though I have strong feelings for him? Do I tell him how I feel and chance him running in the other direction or do I wait and see what happens with him? I feel like I'm such an idiot when it comes to relationships.
122025
Don't say you're an idiot...I don't know you but I'm sure you are a nice girl...no one really is an expert or born knowing how to deal with relationship matters...for what is worth it sounds like you wish to have a REAL relationship...you mentioned that you guys had agreed on not having a relationship but see now you have feelings for him...and the longer you wait the more damaging you are doing to yourself(if he's not interested). Tell him how you feel about the situation.if he runs away then YOU'LL KNOW that he is not the right one..BUT DONT FOOL YOURSELF and hide your feelings...BEST OF LUCK TO YOU.
220310
well by the sounds of it he already has made a massive mistake & lost you . I hope he realizes what he had . On the upside at least he never went behind your back either but he has to learn he can't have his cake & eat it too. Sounds like u are still young. typical to want to sleep with someone else but the thought of u doing it he can't stand . I think move on there are plenty of men out there that will treat u right this guy i hate to say it wo'nt change do'nt let him drag you down find a nice guy & later on down the track u will be wondering what all the fuss was about Good luck with this.
25616
BOOOOYAAAAH... Something to wake you up...\n\n**Slap**\n\nGirl 1st of all why would you like to get back with him? Don't you smell a rat when it's near you? Imagine your story as a film... Would you advice a girl to get back with the man who wanted nothing but "SEX"? This may sound harsh and everything but good but if try and stay away from him then you might learn something... It wont be easy to stay away from someone you think you love... You want him back bcoz he got the best of you but if you look at the other side of this story it would be a blessing in disguise why coz you were able to learn as early as now that this guy is nothing but "1 bam thank you mam" type of guy... \n\nAlways remember this "ALL GUYS WOULD DO ANYTHING TO GET THOSE PANTIES OFF YOU" the only one who can control things is you...\n\nMy advice give it time and do something else than think of him as the "ONE"... \n\nIm sorry if I offended you in any manner... I have no intentions of doing so...\n\nHope I was able to help you out...
344986
He probably does like you, but not the way you want him to.\nIf you weren't in a committed relationship there isn't much you can do.\nI am a firm believer in NOT sleeping with someone until he/she is committed to only you.\nOf course, if you're okay with just having casual sex, then there is nothing wrong with it...but if you think you have feelings for the person, and they haven't told you they want to be in a real relationship with just you, then you can't fault them if you sleep with them anyway.\n\nIf you're looking for more than a casual fling, then keep dating hun...you'll find the right guy. Just hold off on sleeping with them until you're sure its for real!\n\ngood luck!
656156
Let's see I can point out so many things that are wrong about this situation. First off he has a girl why are you trying to break a relationship. Two He want to sleep with you and he has no feeling for you. Why would you sell yourself out like that. How do you expect any man to respect you if you don't respect yourself. \n\nMy advice to you is get yourself right first. Then go and find a man that's doesn't have a girl. A man that is going to respect you and have feelings for you. And a man that wants to get to know you and not get you in bed right off the bat.\n\nHAVE RESPECT FOR YOURSELF!!!
597927
im in a situation just like you ilove my guy to death but i feel isolated but ive been going out with him for 3 years. ive stayed with him by making him want me. i just did simple things like call him and tell him i just wanted to say hi and hear your voice so net i gotta go talk to you later and then i realize (on my ID) that he called me like 3 or 4 times he never leaves a full messge its either hey baby or hi and thats how he keeps me wanting him!\n       good luck!!!!
319374
wow...I'm in the EXACT same position. I could've asked this question because I'm going through the same thing. I've been absolutely infatuated with this guy and don't know what I will do once he leaves. It's so difficult but the best way to get through it is to find another guy. It sounds much easier than it really is because no one compares to "him."
398552
I will tell you how I caught my husband. Basically I wasn't very clingy, I gave him plenty of space. Always keep yourself up, not meaning make up on everytime you see him. Just make sure you are always appealing, if you can't take care of yourself then you can't take care of him. Also if the guy happens to be into sports you need to show interest in that, don't act like a sports freak if your not but just show interest. That also goes for anything else he shows a huge interest in. Do genuine things for him to show him that you will be there. Last but not least when you finally include sex in your relationship put it on him, men like freaky woman. Just don't give in to fast use descretion cause you don't want him to think your a fling you want to be his main girl. Hope that helps.
146240
No not at all, I went through this same thing a couple of years ago a male frined and I both came outta long, serious relationships about the same time and were feeling quite down and bruised by the whole thing and ended up being together alot of the time talking about it and of course one thing led to another and we eventually slept together and it just became a habit (I know that sounds awful!!) but neither of us could face another relationship at that time and we aren't into one night stands so we'd just hook up have the best laugh and then enjoy great sex before saying goodbye in the morning with no pressure it was ideal, it went on for about two yeras until we both just met people we wanted to be with and then it fizzled out but we're still the best of friends now (purely platonic!!) so it worked out fine.  The only thing I'd watch out for is that you both understand the situation if one person has feelings that the other dosen't have then it will cause problems and you shouldn't do it but if you both know it's just sex cos you have needs then go for it.  Good Luck!!
170715
THINGS LIKE THAT TAKE TIME DON'T RUSH HIM AND DON'T RUSH YOURSELF INTO A RELATIONSHIP MY BF AND I DATED AND SLEPT TOGETHER FOR OVER A YEAR BEFORE WE MADE IT OFFICIAL AND THERE WERE TIMES WHEN I THOUGHT WHY ISN'T HE TRYING TO MAKE ME HIS GIRL BUT THEN A WEEK LATER I WASN'T REALLY READY FOR IT AND OUR SCHEDULES CLASHED TOO, THATS WHY WE LET NATURE RUN IT'S COURSE. I DATED OTHER MEN WHILE I WAS DATING HIM THAT DOESN'T MEAN I SLEPT WITH THEM BUT PUT IT LIKE THIS HE WAS MY MAIN BUT I STILL DIDN'T PUT ALL MY EGGS IN ONE BASKET. I'M NOT SAYING WAIT FOR HIM BUT IF HE'S INTERESTED IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME. STILL SEE HIM BUT DO YOUR OWN THING TO UNTIL IT BECOMES OFFICIAL. THEN IF FOR WHATEVER REASON IT DOESN'T WORK OUT YOU HAVE A BACK UP PLAN AND WHO KNOWS YOU MIGHT MEET SOMEONE EVEN BETTER. PEOPLE ALWAYS RUSH INTO RELATIONSHIPS BECAUSE THEY THINK THERE SO IN LOVE WHEN THINGS ARE RUSHED THEY NEVER WORK OUT PATIENTS IS A VIRTUE, MY GUY AND I TOOK IT EASY. NOW WE LIVE TOGETHER AND HAVE BEEN WITH ONE ANOTHER FOR 4 YRS. \nTAKE YOUR TIME..\n\nGOOD LUCK !
654362
yea, it was wrong of u to lie to him in the first place. but from how i see it, i dont think u should just sit around and wait for him to come around. who knows when he'll get over it? n the idea of him suggesting u two becoming sex buddies made me confused about his intentions. and men dare say women are complicated! but anyway, i think u should just go out and see other people. if he gets upset, ask him what are u suppose to do? wait for him until he realises that he wants u more than a sex buddy? what would that make u? sounds pretty desperate to me... BUT, if your heart thinks he's worth it and he is more than what u made him appear to be, then stay home, be good, show him you're worth falling in love with, and keep waiting. just make sure u're happy. it's all that matters.
345505
If I had been in your situation, that would have bothered me terribly.  You just have to remember that your boyfriend wasn't with you (maybe he didn't even know you) when that happened.  He wasn't thinking about saving himself for you...maybe he thought SHE was the one.  But he's with you now, which is far more important.  Maybe you just want to be extra careful before you two sleep together...make sure he's the one, so you don't repeat his mistake.  But honestly, these days, finding THE one the first time is difficult and unlikely.  So maybe you should base your decision on whether you truly love him.  If you do, you'll have no regrets.  Love is something special and rare...even if/when it's gone, you'll remember how great it was and your decision won't seem like the wrong one.  Most importantly, cut yourself some slack, too...no one's perfect, not even your boyfriend.  Best of luck!
75560
Is this guy telling the truth about not having sex, or is he just trying to sleep with you?\n\nDo you like this guy or have "feelings" for him?  If no, then I wouldn't sleep with him.\n\nMaybe find a date for him, or an escort to boost his self-esteem.
273761
If he's not your boyfriend and you wouldn't feel comfortable going any further than you already have - TELL HIM, before you agree to go out again.  If you're honest with him from the outset, then at least he'll know where he stands with you and can make his own decision whether to pursue you as a sexual partner, to just remain friends or whether to fall away from your life.  You, too, will be able to feel confident that he understands what you (don't) want from your relationship with him.  \n\nHe might not like you (if he feels you led him to think he might get something back or considers you to be selfish) but he'll respect you for being honest.  From this base you could both agree a new direction for your relationship.\n\nKeeping quiet and getting anxious about what he might want of you, should you ever meet again, IS selfish and self-destructive. Selfish because you are not allowing him to know what you are thinking and to give his contribution in how your relationship proceeds.  Self-destructive because you are getting worried (stressed?) by excluding the one person with who you could resolve that anxiety.\n\nI guess what I'm trying to say is: no matter what kind of relationship you want to have with this guy, it'll be no kind of relationship if you don't communicate.\n\nBest wishes going forward
655066
Well the fact that you have been talking to this guy every night straight for a week is an indication he is interested.  Now, slow your roll!  If you just ended a bad relationship, try not to get caught up in worrying about where this guys head is at.  You mentioned that you didn't want to rush things but then again you are wanting signs that will tell you if he likes you so you won't be wasting your time.  How are you wasting your time if you aren't trying to rush things?   If anything, you should be looking at him as someone to talk to and if you both share a common interest, enjoy those things.  Down the road, see where things go,if nothing comes of it relationship wise, you might have made a good male friend.  It's possible.
26869
Sex confuses everything. I'm pretty sure that at the start of your escapades, you both decided that this was just casual sex (maybe it was something he decided). But then, you started to develop feelings for him. And you can't keep it inside anymore.\n\nOption 1. Let him know you're falling for him. \nResult: a. He'll accept it and he'll let you know he likes you two. You'll develop a relationship.\nb. He'll reject the idea of falling love and demands that it stays only at sex. You can accept that and continue to have sex and have your feelings walk all over. Or you can reject his rejection and leave the sexual relationship and move on.\nc. He can reject how you feel and never have sex with you again. He might be scared of a relationship. He never signed up for it.\n\nOption 2. Don't tell him how you feel.\nResult a. You continue to have a friends with benefits relationship that will never amount to anything. Maybe you'll meet someone who you'll want to date, but it'll be hard cause you been busy having sex with someone who's occupying your time. Or maybe he'll meet someone and you'll have a broken heart. and to make those matters worse, if he's a ****, he can have a relationship with someone else while he's still having sex with you. And you won't stop it because you're still in love with him.\nb. You keep all your feelings inside. All those feelings will keep on growing. And before you know it, you'll be acting like his girlfriend trying to control what he does and who he sees. He won't want to have any of it and will leave you. \nc. His feelings for you grow and he can't keep it held. He lets you know how he feels. You end up having a beautiful wonferful relationship that started purely on sex. I'm not sure of many guys that are like this, but I don't know him.\n\nTruthfully. You've got to communicate. You can't keep stuff like that bottled in. But you'll also have to accept that he might not want to hear it. Is the sex really worth you feeling used and unloved? Either he loves you too, or its time to move on.\n\nBest wishes.
412671
I don't know. I've slept with four people so far (all people I had at least year long relationships with except for my current boyfriend) and I've found that if they make you happy in other ways they're a keeper. There are so many things you haven't tried sexual, if you're otherwise happy with your relationship why not stick with him and experiment? I'd talk things over with him before running off-keep in mind the grass isn't usually greener on the other side and when another girl has him you may wish you hadn't ran off.