My girlfriend and i are about to enter a long distance relationship, and i am devastated.  She and i are going to different colleges.  We have both committed ourselves to the other and we are both in love with each other and we both want the relationship to eventually lead into marriage.  The only problem for me is that i am worried that between our college schedules, we won't have very much time for one another and that could end the relationship.  Each of us are willing to put in the time and effort, but neither of us wants the other to compromise their grades/schoolwork for the other because we want to see the other be successful.  Also i am a little scared about entering this relationship because i do fear that the distance will kill it.  I love her trust her and am completely committed to her, and i am willing to wait any amount of time for her, and she feels the same exact way.  I now only have a few months with her.  Does anyone have advice for me? how can i stop my worries.
128326
if you love her trust her and are committed to her and she feels the exact same way...then i don't think you need to worry!\ni have never even met my girlfriend - we're online yet! and yea we love each other to death and we trust each other totally, and with all our hearts!! and yea we'll be getting married too...and thats not gonna happen for another 4 years, at least, but yea i'm not worried about anything because we have TRUST in each other and thats all it takes for a LD to work out! TRUST & LOVE!\nso i don't think you need to worry pal...chill out! and all the best for your future!!
26997
Omg...there is so much to say about long distance relationships...I just got out of a long distance relationship about a month and a half ago, there are many many many things you should consider before pursuing a long distance relationship....we only lived about an hour and fifteen minutes away from eachother, but there will were soo many times when I Was having a bad day and just hearing his voice WAS NOT enough!!..you are going to want and need her by yourside at times when she can't be!...there will also be a lot of long, cold and lonely nights that you have no choice but to spend by yourself.I am not knocking long distance relationships, but you should really make sure you are ready for such a big step! you will have to be a strong willed person in order to make it work,because it is not easy! there will be times when you will see other couples together hand in hand, and wish it was you and her, or maybe a happy couple on T.V, but no matter what it is you will feel the pain of not being able to be with her as often as you would like especially when couples are all around you!.. but it isnt all bad though, sometimes it is very exciting! it also depends on how often you will be able to see eachother. we used to see eachother at LEAST every other weekend if not more, but it was still super hard and lonely when we werent together! my advice to you is that if deep down in your heart you really think that you guys can make it work, then go for it, and the wisest thing i can tell you is DO NOT LET OTHER PEOPLES OPINIONS INFLUENCE YOUR DECISION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so many people will have something to say about it, and will tell you it wont work and try to discourage you, DONT get discouraged...One of things that  kept me and him together for so long is that we didnt care what the hell other people thought about what we were doing, and in this type of situation you need to do the same thing, or else its not going to work, because people can be VERY convincing sometimes, and you just might end up missing out on one of the best things in your life!
24705
This would be easier if you said the one who is a long distance girlfriend is the controling one, because that would be an instant "GUeh-oodbye!"\n\nHey you're young in college, did you need to settle down? You're still discovering yourself at the moment, and this is a good time to not be obligated to anyone.\nIf it were me, I'd tell the controlling one that I like her enough to hang out with in social settings, but I do not want to be tied down period, and if she's gonna loose her mind about it, she can just move on right away.\nThe girl back home- she sounds like the kind of person you don't want to lose touch with. Maybe you could both agree to see other people. Bearing in mind this means SHE can go out with other guys, who are going to want to try and get in good with her, possibly try to score, and if the idea of someone scoring with YOUR girl, bothers you. Well.....\n\nLong distance doesn't have to be a bad thing. I know for myself, when you're finally together again, nothing is sweeter than the feel of their skin, the light in their eyes, and their sweat mingling with yours... oops got carried away there. But that's my point, does the girl at home really do it for you, would you burn with jealousy if she started hanging with another guy? IF so, she's the one, atleast for now, and so long as she knows how imporant she is to you, you'll both be fine.\n\nYou're at college, STUDY man! (and party some, but I didn't say that)
272538
Oh that is so awesome that he is going to be an aggie! Be proud that you've found such a great guy!!! It will definitley be hard to be in a long distance relationship, especially since you are both in college. But I think you guys are both smart, so I have faith that you can do it! Gig 'em Aggies!!!
150509
tell them how you feel, but find out if the feeling is mutual??!!  Long-distance relationships are hard to hold onto and keep alive.  if ya ll two are really serious about one another than find away to be with one another. I hope everything works out for the best for you.   good luck
617532
A long distant relationship can work, it both parties are truly committed.  However, it all depends how long you will be apart from eachother...  If it is just until school is finished, that's different, but if it's because you both just live in different states, then that is something to think about... \n\nSometimes one person will get tired of being lonely and tired of not being able to see each other on a regular....\n\nIt can work, but will take a lot of hard work....\n\nGOOD LUCK
641957
I know what u mean....my BF lives in Houston.....where I am in College Station....TX.....it is almost 2 hrs away....BUT....we talk on the phone EVERYDAY......send emails everyday.....& he just drove up here today....out of the blue to see me.....of course we only got to spend 4 hrs with each other...it was amazing.....I have had long distance relationships before.....but this one kind of grows.....every time we see each other....we grow "fonder"....they say absence makes the heart grow fonder.....I really like my BF too.....it is hard for us because of the distance...as well as our work schedules....but we make it happen......what I like about him....HE comes to me, more then I go to him.......Just be patient.....like one other person said....let him figure out a way to come to u.....if it was meant to be....something will work out.....GOOD LUCK!...
272348
Depends on if you still want to be in a relationship with her. You can love someone but just not have time for a relationship. If you want to continue the relationship, talk with her about it and explain the situation. Work on some compromises so her needs are met. Encourage her to spend time with her friends, take classes, join a gym, join a club, whatever, so she's not just sitting at home waiting on you and feeling ignored/resentful. Also work on ways you can stay in touch and communicate with each other, even if you are working on work/school deadlines or are studying abroad.
141588
There's nothing about being selfish in this situation you're being reasonable. You can let this new guy know where you stand and let him know that you need sometime to sort through things in your life before getting back into another relationship. At the end of the if he wants to start another relationship with someone else you guys can still be friends and move on from there. On the other hand, if he wants to wait for you then you know he's in deed a really good guy. With my friendship/relationship I've been with my boyfriend for a 1.5 years and we were in the same state but then I went out of state to complete a Masters' degree and to be fair I gave him the option of being with someone else if someone else came along before I came back to MI to be with him. I did that because either one of us has never had a long distance relationship, so I didn't want to make him feel that he is "tied to me" while i'm out of state at Graduate school. The "separation" didn't happen we ended up still being together and when I came back to MI to visit him the love was there as if I was always there with him. So good things happen if its suppose to happen that way. Good luck and I wish you all the best.
370148
Long distance relationships require commitment from both parties. Maybe you should call her or send her an e-mail, snail mail just to let her know that she's on your mind and that you care.
485595
Long distance relationships are hard to maintain. I don't think there is a specific length of time you should wait because I don't believe you should wait at all. It sounds like you need to just live your life and not count on this fellow being "the one." Like my Ma used to say-"there are a lot of fish in the sea". If it is meant to work out things will progress but why not get to know someone who lives close. There is a lot to say for building a relationship based on spending time together doing things not just talking or e-mailing each other. LOL
659698
I was in a long distance relationship for more than two years - we lived an hour apart - & at first we talked all day too & were together whenever we could be - but the last 9 months or so he stopped callin - it tapered off to once a day, then only once a week & we didn't spend so much time together - well, he ended the relationship a month ago with no explanation, just an e-mail. \nSo it sounds like even tho ya'll love each other, you are starting to drift as we did - it happens & it's hard to keep it from going south unless one of you can change to spend more time together. I was the only one making the effort there, too, for a long time - I drove to see him, never the other way around. I don't know - you may have to let this one go & move along. It bites, I know. Good luck.
217963
Long distance relationships can work as long as two people are dedicated to each other and want it to work. The two of you are the only ones that will be able to tell if its working. If both of you are completely happy with each other and the way things are going then things are going well I would presume. :) If you truly love each other go for it cause it's more than likely going to work. :) Good luck!
555109
Sounds like the situation is too deep to simply resolve before going away to college.  I suggest that you tread lightly around her until you leave (so not to aggravate the situation more) and when you're at college, do your best and make good grades.  I'm a parent and knowing that my kids are doing well in college is a great gift.  Although you two may not be getting along on day-to-day issues, I am sure she will be very proud if you do well in college.  This could be the ice breaker you need to start improving your relationship.
671191
Yes! Long distance relationships CAN work out! It is A LOT of hard work. I don't know what country you are from and what the customs are there, so I don't know how relevant or plausible my advice will be.\n\nAlways tell her your true feelings. Let her know your worries. Don't forget to tell her how much she means to you, OFTEN!\n\nAlways treat each other with honesty, trust, understanding, respect, and be willing to compromise and to communicate thoughts and feelings openly. This is the basic foundation of a relationship that both people need to work on to make it work, especially for a long distance relationship.\n\nIf you've both been waiting for each other six years, I don't think there's much to worry about. Once you have earned the money, go back and see her. Tell her and show her how much she means to you. Talk about both of your futures.\n\nFight for your relationship, but also be realistic. Sometimes no matter how much both of you care about each other, there are other things that get in the way, such as time and physical distance. Long distance relationships can work, depending on how willing both people are to put hard work into the relationship.
33781
I understand that you are a busy person. That likely won't change, even when you're done with your undergraduate studies. Your girlfriend wanting to see you is a sign of how she feels about you and that she wants to maintain that closeness. Therefore, if I were you I'd definitely schedule time to be with her in person, even if not regularly.\n\nThere are some things you can do, in the meantime, that will make huge impressions on her.\n\nFor example (see Source where these came from):\n\nPut together a care package for her. Take some time to buy her several little gifts along the lines of things she likes. Write a couple of love notes and include them in the package. Don't tell her you are sending it. Let it be a surprise.\n\nSend her some handwritten letters via snailmail. It's a lot more personal than email and she'll appreciate the extra effort you went through, particularly with your busy schedule.\n\nSchedule a date to participate in the same activity in your separate location. For example, plan on seeing a particular movie at the same time. Just knowing you're both doing it at the same time helps the closeness. Then afterwards talk about the movie like you would had you actually been together.\n\nIt's important to maintain that closeness even when you're apart and even if you absolutely can't meet her on a regular basis, you can do things that still show her how much you care. But try to do both. Your relationship will grow a lot closer.
290640
The bold thing to do, of course, would be to suggest marriage, if that's how you feel.  That's a strong commitment.\n\nIt sounds like he is leery of getting into a long distance relationship.  I'm not clear if you are moving or he is, but in either case, the best way for that kind of relationship to work is for it to be a temporary distance.  If he is causing the distance, you'll have to find a way to tell him you'll be short distance again too.  \n\nYou might consider writing a letter, reviewing your good and bad times, and then let him know you can't see going through any more good and bad times without him to see you through.  Put it all in perspective for him.\n\nGood luck!