im 17 and i JUST got a job at a clothing store and my boss is 19 and he told me he wants hang out w/ me b/c he thinks im hott!! i dont know how to react!!! hes attractive but i dont like him back (and i have a bf). WHAT DO I DO ABOUT THIS?! (dont say quit b/c this is the perfect/most convinent job 4 me)HELP!
135514
don't quit.  \n\nhere's what you need to do.\nwrite a statement (just a word document will do) stating the date, time and location of the first occurence.  write exactly what transpired. "i was doing(blank). and (blank) walked up and asked me how i was doing. i said fine adn he asked "hey wanna hang out sometime b/c you're hot".\n\nbe sure to use his and your exact words as best as you can remember.\nbe sure to date the document with the date you wrote it.  include the date it happened also.\n\ndocument any other inappropriate conduct on his part in the same way as your first statement.  keep theese documents to yourself until you may need them.\nthis way you have docuementation of the incidents and they are to the best of your memory adn they are dated with times and locations, etc.\nthese can be difficult to argue with from his side if it goes that far.\n\nnext, i want you to graciously decline his offer of "hanging out".  Be sure to make 3 points when doing this:\npoint 1--you have a boyfriend.\npoint 2--you are underage and therefore shouldn't be dating anyone over 18 (even if your bf is 21...still make this point)\npoint 3--it would be inappropriate for the two of you to hang out since he is your supervisor.\n\nyou don't need to be on attack when you tell him these points. just be yourself, but be sure to mention all of them.  the reason for each is:\npoint 1--boyfriend = butt kicker\npoint 2--even if you really don't care about dating someone older than you, this point red flags....you = jail\npoint 3--him advancing on you = his termination from job\n\nbasically, you need to make these points so he hears LOUD AND CLEAR that you aren't interested and he needs to back off.  but, if you say it in a nice enough way with enough tact he will hopefully get the picture without taking his disappointment out on you.\n\nif he does retaliate b/c you won't hang out with him, then you take your documentation to his supervisor and let the boss take it from there. explain to your boss what you expect from the situation.  do you expect your supervisor to lose his job?  do you expect to be transferred to a new department??  do you expect your supervisor transferred??  DO you just want the advances to stop and him not retaliate on you???\n\ni hope this was helpful.  i've been in big business for a long time and you shouldn't quit...keep taking the problem higher up the food chain until someone cares.  AND since you're a minor, don't be afraid to get your parents involved if thigns get out of your control.\n\ni've had to deal with sexual harassment in the workplace from all angles and it's no picnic for anyone, but it is serious and should be treated as such.\n\ngood luck and i hope he stops after you tell him "no" and he doesn't retaliate on you.
265769
just keep smiling dont let him get to you, be polite and nice until you can find another job
397463
GET OUT NOW!!\n\nYou don't owe this person ANYTHING!!\n\nFor a boss to say it's a 'personality clash' is diabolical!!\n\nWhat kind of management style is that? S**t - that's what!!\n\nYou SO deserve better.\n\nGO RIGHT THIS MINUTE AND DON'T LOOK BACK!
46330
Dont hide it...If your boss finds out screw him..if you get fired then find another job cuz that one wasn't worth having in the first place. Nobody can tell you who to and not to date.
66599
It would be best that you express to him how you feel about hiim- not only to see if he feels the same way but to get the feeling off your chest. However since this is in the workplace, you should be cautious about how you approach this romance. If you two start dating, don't make it too public among your coworkers. I would leave the relationship alone period if you have a good position at your job and you see yourself getting promoted in the near future- just to be safe.
418708
I have some experience with this... The best thing you can do is 1 BE YOURSELF... what ever age you are, be it and don't apologize for it... the 52 yr old may have times when they want to treat you like you are younger and know less...\nDon't, you were put in charge for a reason... always be kind, and try to be nice... but stay THE BOSS. Don't let yourself ask for or actually even take advice; or they can get to feel like the 2 of you are manager:)\n\n2nd. Don't be friends with any of them. BE FRIENDLY!!! But keep it professional. The people closer to your age, you may have an easier time relating to them or understanding them, and they may be people you could be great friends with. But you can't let yourself be chummy with some and not others. If you let it get to a "buddy" point, it's real easy for people to take advantage of the situation without even realizing they are doing it. "Can I have that day off? It's better for me..."  or "Oh, I'm just gonna be a few mins late ___ won't care they're cool"\nYou gotta stay a little detached and keep everyone equal, from experience that's what I found.
668107
Don't carry yourself like a "young pretty girl" be a young pretty self confident woman, if someone makes an inappropriate comment in front of everyone I would give him a look that would send daggers through his heart to let him know I'm not playing games with him and if he gets you alone and make a comment I would tell him I don't appreciate him treating me like anything other than a fellow employee. do your job and do it well and they cannot fire you because you don't smile and act like a hoochie.but always remember there's no amount of money to buy your dignity. tell your boss in a respectable manner that you like your job and you want to learn and grow and work for him but if he and the other men there are making you feel uncomfortable with the comments. you have to decide if you are going to ignore the comments or deal with them. i work in a hospital as a LPN and  a male RN talked down to me because he felt I was beneath him so I invited my husband who is 6 feet tall 240 pounds of muscle to have lunch with me and i never had any more trouble
626305
I think he totally likes you. I'm sort of going through the same thing right now...I totally have a crush on this guy at work but I have a boyfriend!! Just try to keep flirting down to a minimum so you don't lead him on but also to protect your relationship. And make sure you remain friends with him, it's always good to have a buddy at work  =)
206843
One thing you have to remember in a job. You are there to support your boss. Some bosses are dogmatic and want you to do things only their way. Others are more flexible and allow a lot of latitude in how you do your job. Then there are all those in between. If you don't get along with your boss, then go someplace where you can work with someone who is more in tune with your personality.\n\nBut... also look at your own approach. Are you confrontational? Do you get annoyed over someone else telling you what to do? Do you challenge the rules simply to challenge the rules? If you ever want to be in a "boss" position, you have to learn how to be a good employee first. Otherwise nobody will think you are mature enough to be trusted with decisions. This is something I had to learn early in my career. Not every battle is worth winning. Pick the ones that mean something and leave the other ones alone. You may win a battle, but you could lose the war.
418473
You should try to meet with him to see what he has to say or offer maybe he wants you back and wants to apologize for what happened. About deciding to go back it is entirely up to you. Ask yourself: Did you like your job? Was it really something you really wanted to do? or was it just a "temp" job? Then take a decision. If your boss says he wants you back try to fight a little maybe you can get a better deal and something you really really want.
441505
He's trying to keep his job secure by being the one that does all the work. If everybody is picking on him, then he has to feel vulnerable to being fired. But if he is thew one getting the job done, then he's good to have around. You need to talk to him again and explain that you need to be able to do the work too. And maybe you could stick up for the guy on occasion, that might help too. And by the way, your supervisor is an azz for belittling and making fun of the people under him especially in front of other employees.
426544
Wow that had to hurt you alot. i Cannot imagine the thought that you were holding back someone you loved. BUT i do not think you are. If hes not worried i wouldn't either. Sounds like his boss needs to get with he times and realize that gays, interracial couples, lesbians and most relationships are common place. I am sure if he keeps pushing your boyfriend that he will make a decision to find another firm rather than loose you. Good luck
499816
You better be really sure he likes you too, or you could lose your job.  Most guys would be flattered regardless of how they felt and would probably not report you to your manager if you tried, but you have to decide if the risk is worth it.
623653
You should tell your boss how you feel, and tell him/her what the lady does. If it really upsets and interfeers with your job, let your boss know. the worst he can do is not do anything.
358755
You want a pic of a work colleague? This has stalker all over it. Why dont you ask the guy out for a drink after work and see if he likes you. Once you become bf and gf then you are entitled to a pic but sooner than that and you are desperate.
387929
When it comes to relationships we should not look at other people as being on the same level that we are - below us or above us. The way you talk about yourself -you seem to be an attractive person.  You talk about your breast size as being less  then an A size cup.. As far as the older guy that you mentioned goes he may just find you attractive and like you as well. He may notice your great personality.  If he is single flirt with him more. Maybe the younger guys turn you off because they lack maturity. They can sense that you are too grown up for their silly games. Get out and enjoy your life. There are men outside of the work place.
589476
It's very common, and I don't think it's wrong, unless you act on it. It might be awkward if you are working with him, but I don't think that you should change your plans just because you're attracted to him, unless you find a better position. There will likely be more bosses and unavailable coworkers in the future that you will find attractive, so if you want to live your life, you might just have to grin and bear it.