What do you do when you love someone, are engaged to be married w/in the next few months, but at the same time you are so fed up with this person that you just want to scream? You miss them when they are gone, but its not what you want when you are together. You still want things to work out, but what can you do to makes things smooth over?
137903
i dont think your ready for marriage, actually i think you should wait a while and re think what it was that brought you and your partner together. sounds like your in a slump and very confused,  but best to wait then be sorry later on. talk to him and discuss how you feel.
261974
Get out now.  The longer you drag it on the worse it will be.  No job is worth giving up your happieness either.  You do not want to be in a marriage when you don't love someone.  Trust me I know.  I'm married with two kids and not in love with my husband anymore.  If I'd have known what I know now....
66862
Well I just recently got married two months ago and I think that it's absence that makes the heart grow fonder. Before I couldn't wait to see her and I would get all excited when I prepare to meet her. Now that I see her everyday I think I've grown more accustomed to her as she did to me. This is when people start treating each other less "special" I believe the trick is to try and maintain that feeling.
100529
Divorce sucks, but I wouldn't let the potential keep me from getting married.  Just make sure you really believe it's someone you want to spend your life with.  I know that's easier said than done, but be strong, and be honest with yourself and your partner, and you shouldn't have anything to worry about.  I wish you all the hapiness and luck in your relationships.
277107
I would have to say that I have a tendency to expect too much, too fast. I am of the age and mind set that I want to be married, and unfortunately I almost lost the man that I truly love because of this. We are happily engaged now, but my insistence on knowing exactly where we were in our relationship caused him to pull away. That was my wake up call. We have since come to a compromise regarding boundaries, and are much, much happier and comfortable with each other. I never would have categorised myself as a pushy person, but I found out that when faced with losing something that I had never had before, I could step back and see the bigger picture. I give advice often about noticing the needs of your partner or spouse and accepting those needs without question, I just wished I would have taken my own advice a little sooner than I did. Peace.
243066
It seems when things get tense we always imagine the worst will happen to our marriage.  It doesn't have to just because someone else did it.  We can always get past a tough point.  Maybe you just need more time together.
120744
WOW!!  I can so relate and can feel and understand the confusion and not knowing how to walk away from what you truly love, and believed was everything you had been looking for...  I wish I could tell you what the "right" thing to do is, but I would be a hypicite.  I know from the outside looking in that the self respecting and having love for yourself firstmost, would be to cut your losses and see him for the person he really is and not the person you're in love w/ that you THOUGHT he was.  To even consider waiting around for a man to deciede if he rather have you or an x is INSANE!!!  I know this in my mind, yet I have allowed myself to give up all my self respect and dignity for 6 months waiting for my so called "fiance" to decied between me & his x wife of 20 years.  In the past 6 months he has went back and forth 5xs! I also describe my guy exactly how you did yours, but I was wrong that isnt who he is.  I allowed to waiy and let him struggle w/ his indiscion tuntil I had no self respect left for myself & became willing to settle for him any way I could.  That's not what love and foorever is supposed to feel like.  Don't allow yourself to dig yourself into that hole because its a hard 1 to climb out of.  If he is'nt 1000% sure that u r the only one he will ever want, he is'nt worthy of you!  Don't sell yourself short.The loneliest place in the world is laying next to somone who doesnt love you any more, & 1 sided love is hell you deserve heavenly bliss- settle for nothing less.  My man walked out w/o a word and back 2 her 2 days ago, we finally spoke on the phone today and as much as I love who i thought he was I finally decieded i cant stand who he is.  Doesnt stop the hurt or build back my self esteeme i got alot of work to do to get over it...But this time I really believe he does want her mor than me , but why the hell would i ever let a man make that kind of descion i should have given him no more choice in at the 1rst slightest sign of comparing or weighing me against somone else.  Live and learn.  I*t is the hardest most painful 1 i have had to go thru, and hearring your ? i had 2 respond and share my understanding and expierence in hopes you won't allow yours to go on as long or as deep as I did.  Good luck, and ultimatly only u know what's right for u and only u have 2 live w/ the decision.  If i could leave u w/ 1 bit of wisdom it would be the man has to live up to your dreams, dont never settle for less than u have always wanted and deserve.  mr right is out there for us but we gotta get our mr wrongs out of the way!!!
187395
You loved this person enough to marry him and now in a years time you can't stand to be around him, how do people fall in and out of love so easy . Might as well end it .I don't think you 2 were ever in love at all , it sounds like you were more in love with the idea of being married rather then the person you married. Hope you don't make the same mistake again.
235127
I hear your frustration, but I also hear someone who is still in love with the person they married.  Sure, you don't feel for him the way you used but some of that is normal after 10 years, and some of that is from the financial frustration that is dragging you down.  Some times life just doesn't work out the way we had planned and we have to decide if it is best to adjust our expectations or change our lives.  This isn't easy as you have stated because you may find out that nothing changes or things are even worse without him.  Divorce is a huge step and a risk because it doesn't guarantee you that everything will get better.  I guess the big question is, can things change financially just because of a divorce?
246433
i reached out and rested my hands on somthing while waiting for someone and this man i didnt know  grabed my hand inspected it and said "what no ring? why arnt you married yet?" like it is somesort of crime to be single. i told him as much but he just shook his head. the person he was there for called to him and went an had a meeting with them. if he isnt married i know why:>
599028
Now my spouse makes me feel complete. It only took 30 years. All I can say is you have to compromise. If you fight, you can't leave , you can ignore each other until everything cools down. I watched my sibblings leave their spouses time and time again, they always went back. That was time wasted. Work things out. There are no 2 people perfectly compatable. You have to work at it. Even now , we are not even 80% compatable, but there was no way, even 10 years ago that I was gonna start over. You probably found the right person, but how would you know , now? Good luck.
606069
Be miserable, like I am. It wouldn't be so bad if the man I married loved and respected me. I guess that doesn't help you, but these things happen. Do what you need to do to make things right, if you can.
304236
Aww honey don't be sad. I just broke up with my fiance last Tuesday and we lived together I know how much this hurts. However you have to remember that what is meant to be will be. If you and him are meant to be together nothing, and I mean nothing can keep you apart. You need to stay busy and dont think about it. I know how easy it is right now to overanalyze every little detail. Don't. Thats just going to bring you down more. Look into the future, always have hope and take care of yourself. Surround yourself with friends and family and remember "this too shall pass"
591864
Nope. I married someone that loves me and cares for me so deeply. I did love him once, but he killed my love....now that I am married I realized that I hate myself for not following my heart. Its not fair to try to make someone happy and living a fake life that you may not feel. Trust me. I can't get out of it, and each day gets harder and harder.
221037
No, I wouldn't want to stay married because I feel trapped in marriage. I felt like I just, "settled" with my husband out of fear of being alone. I think he did the same, but is too proud to admit it. We aren't each others soul mate because we have NOTHING in common and do not have the same expectations in life. We simply got comfortable with each other and left it that way.
230523
You choose to continue loving them.  The feelings of love (normally lust) will diminish and you are left with this person who is not what you thought they were now that you can see them without your blinders.  At this point, you choose to continue loving the person by over looking the annoying habits and doing things you know pleases them.  Find their (and your) love language.  It makes a huge difference!  Check out the love language book at your local library.
432588
Had many of the same feelings when I first met my fiance.  Luckily they have subsided a bit and am now more able to lead a more "normal" life.  I still do think of her quite often and by no means does it mean that I think or respect he any less.  It's just that the initial honeymoon stage has worn off, took about 2 years and so am a little more grounded now.  Best of luck to you and yours.