Dr.Haledjian was in Inspector Winters' office waiting for the next case to solve when Inspector Winters came in with Jacques Strap. "He's charged with murdering Frank Buzz," snapped the Inspector.\n\n"It's a mistake," cried Jacques.\n\n"So then what were you doing in an alley with a gun and a dead man?" asked the Inspector.\n\n"It wasn't my gun , and I'll tell you the truth. I was walking past the theater when I saw two men run past me. The second man was carrying a gun. So I followed them. They turned into an alley and the second man fired six shots at the other. The first man dropped dead to the ground. The murderer was about to walk away when he caught a glimpse of me. Knowing there was no escape, he threw his Colt 45 at me and ran to the fire exit door of the theater. There he pushed open the door and went inside. I was still holding the gun when a cop came running up the alley," finished Jacques.\n\n"I tell you I'm innocent."\n\n"Give me a break", said Dr.Haledjian. "This story is impossible."
137700
How do you open the fire exit door form an alley? ANyways, the fire exit door would have set off an alarm.
531928
There is only one more episode to go before the stupid fall break again:\ncan't remember all or names but the as--hole guard (bellick) got arrested for killing his buddy though the pedophile(T-bag)? did it. kellerman tried to kill Sara but she escaped and burnt him with a hot iron Michael and Lincolns dad got shot and died that rogue FBI guy mahone shot him . Michael and Linc decided to not get on the plane so they could find Sara as there dad told them she had a tape. c-notes wife got caught by police when she went to fill a prescription for their daughter. Michaels friend(Sucre)the one in love with the girl whio was going to marry another guy is on the plane to panama but mahone ordered it to be intercepted or shot down if need be. michael and linc got into a wreck with mahone and he pulled a gun on them michael had been trying to call sara and she answered just as show went off. sara sewed herself up with a needle and thread where she got cut jumping out of the window at the hotel and fell through the windshield of a car. sorry this is not in order but it's almost 5:30 a.m. and I wrote it as I remembered parts hope this help this is my favorite show right now but I hate the breaks between. Bill(the Asian bad guy) is erasing all info about kellerman concerning who he is and being involved with the president or anyone so I guess he is next on the list to die. the way mahone found out where they were was by threating to kill the spanish dude while he was in the hospital also found out michael was once in a very bad foster home and his dad rescued him from there and killed the foster dad lincoln was in juvenile center at the time
134747
Three guys were stranded on an island and stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the men came in. One said, 'I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession.' He turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living. 'I'm a cop', says the first man. ''Then we will shoot your penis off!'said the leader. \nHe then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living. 'I'm a fireman', said the second man. ''Then we will burn your penis off!', said the leader. \nFinally, he asked the last man, 'And what do you do for a living?' And the third man answered, 'I'm a lollipop salesman!'
277855
The author (Marinville) ended up sacrificing himself and let the others escape...He blew up the mine.\nMary got away from Tak...\n\nWhat I was most puzzled by is what happened to Mary's husband Peter and Pi's bodies that were left at the bottom of the stairs.\n\nIt will probably be on DVD soon.
513045
Festus lumbered up to Doc and said, "Doc! Come quick! He beat Matthew up somethin' awful!\n Doc replied, "Now, Festus, don't you be lyin' to me. I'll get on you like ugly on an ape."\n Festus snorted, "Doc, if I'm lyin', I'm dyin'! Some feller named Liberace tried to get too close to Miss Kitty. Somethin' about askin' about make-up tips or some nonsense. Matthew took it the wrong way, and said, "Mister, I don't know when you rolled into town, but you better watch yourself."\n That Liberace feller told him, "It was about the same time that Mama's old sow had that record litter of pigs, that's when I got here!" And then he commenced to whoopin' up on ol' Matt. He left ol' Matthew a layin' on the floor of the Long Branch, I tell ya! The last thing I heard before I came lookin' fer you was Miss Kitty sayin', "Matt, do you know how I worry about you?"\n Doc said, "come on, Festus, let's go give it a look." They went to the Long Branch, and sure enough, there laid ol' Matthew out on the floor with 2 black eyes. Doc cried, "Matt, you shoulda known better than to tangle with that varmint! Well...fiddle...don't you see?"\n Matt replied, "No, Doc, actually, I CAN'T see. Both my eyes are swelled shut!"
426900
*Good one...here's one 4 you.....George was planning on going out with "The Boys" when his wife told him that he wasn't leaving the house.\n\nGeorge's Wife: "The last time you went out with your friends you got so drunk that you puked on your shirt."\n\nGeorge: "But Honey, I promise that I won't drink a drop of alcohol all night!"\n\nSo after begging his wife for an hour, George got the OK the go out with the guys as long as he stayed off of the booze. George met up with the guys at a local bar and proceeded to get $hit-faced. After about 3 hours of guzzling liquor, George blew chow all over his shirt.\n\nGeorge: "$hit! The old lady is going to throw my @ss out of the house for getting drunk and puking on my new shirt!"\n\nBill, George's best pal, gave drunk @ss George an idea of how to keep from getting in trouble with the wife.\n\nBill: "All you got to do is have a $20 bill in your hand when you walk through the door. Then, when she accuses you of barfing all over yourself, just tell her that some other drunk puked on you and that he gave you 20 bucks to get the shirt cleaned."\n\nSo, when George walked into the house with money in hand, his wife was waiting for him in the living room.\n\nGeorges wife: "I knew that your drunk @ss would spew bile and booze all over that new shirt!"\n\nGeorge: "Honey, let me explain! This drunken fool at the bar puked on me and gave me 20 bucks to have it cleaned."\n\nHis wife snatched the money out of his hand and observed that he was holding two $20 bills.\n\nGeorge's wife: "Is that so? Then where did the other 20 dollar bill come from?"\n\nGeorge: "Oh, That's from the guy who $hit in my pants."*
461327
In a recent courtroom drama, accused murderer Jack Merridew was almost attacked by fellow defendant Ralph Grant following his statement in the investigation surrounding the deaths on the island. (Nether) boys are in custody.\n\n(the) courtroom environment that had begun in silence erupted into a flurry of activity when Mr. Merridew provided details into the deaths of some of the boys which provoked an outburst by Mr. Grant. He got up from his seating screaming, “You’re such a liar!” His lawyer, Will Hayden, tried to calm him down. Mr. Grant flew out of his chair in a rage and could hardly be stopped. Running to the stand, intending to attack Mr. Merridew but being restrained by the police in time. \n\nsounds great to me! A worthy =)
111743
Private Investigator, Nat Marley, ran across his old friend, Annie, who had become homeless.  When Annie fainted from a heart condition, Marley applied first aid until the ambulance arrived to transport her to the hospital.  \nThe woman decided it was necessary to make out her willand asked Marley to find her son, Jackie.  \nBecause of his kindness to Annie, Nat was approached by a rich widow named Joanna Whittaker.  Mrs. Whittaker told Nat he resembled her late husband and she wanted to give him all her properties.  Mrs. Whittakers maid, Martha, overheard this offer.  She had been convinced all the properties would become hers when Mrs. Whittaker died and now realized that was not to be. In her rage, she killed Mrs. Whittaker, stole what money she could get her hands on and fled to Las Vegas where she lost it all gambling.\n[very rough, but I think it gives you an idea of the proper voice and procedures]
439960
Burke tells Christina that he cancelled all his procedures and that he was taking a guys day off with Shepherd. After meeting with Derek they went to pick up the Chief and then George who Izzie sent off like a little boy. Meredith told Derek "I hope you are enjoying your space." Preston admits that George was his idea. Next they end up at Joes and pick up Joe and his lover. Suddenly Alex appear and George say that was not my idea.\n\nBack at the hospital that leaves the women in charge, in particular Bailey who assigns Meredith to Mark, Izzie to Lindsey, the resident who took her place that one week, and Christina she kept for herself and made her plw through poop for monopoly pieces in punishment for erasing her name off the surgical board.\n\nIn another room Callie is called on for a consult by Addison. This lady has broken her wrist. Callie puts it in suspension. Addison excuses herself and goes to cry. Callie finds her to see what is up and learns that the baby is dead and she has to tell the lady on the table what has happened. She says it is never easy to tell someone who should be so happy that their baby is dead.\n\nIzzie is getting tired of Lindsey's cheery probing so she volunteers to help Christina dig through poop. \n\nMeredith goes with Mark to see his patient Donna who is in to have her penis turned into a vagina. Meredith had to take a moment to get over the fact that Donna was a man. Then it became a question of saying he or she at that point. Donna's wife tells her to say she. This means Meredith has to spend a large part of the show reading up on penises.\n\nBack in the woods, the guys hike out to a camp sight and pitch tents. Joe and his boyfriend have such a large tent that the Chief asks if he could stay with them not knowing they were gay. George clues him in.  Suddenly he is blathering about "Man Love" and "Brokeback Mountain" and his Gay cousin and how he is all okay with that. Burke broke in before he could further embarrass himself and took the guys fishing. Derek is alittle upset because he thought it would just be the two of them "Mountain Men". Burke concludes Derek does not have any guy friends and that is his problem. Meanwhile the Chief is complaining that the fish don't seem to be biting and Derek tell him that is because you are supposed to be silent when fishing. George is talking to Burke about Christina and Callie and how he is trying to commit to Callie te way Burke committed to Christine. He starts to notice that Burke is casting and reeling funny. Burke tells George that Christina and him are a team a machine that works as one.  Burke excuses himself down the river a bit. \n\nBack at the Hospital it has been made clear to Christina by Bailey that she wants to know why Christina erased her off the board. If she doesn't come clean she will never see the inside of an OR again.\n\nMeanwhile Meredith has set down the rules for Mc Steamy, no flirting, no McSteamy looks, no talking about Derek. He broke all of those rules in about two seconds. His approach was that Derek was damaged. He damaged him, She needs to move on with him.\n\nAddison and Callie are having to deal with the woman who wants Addison to say it. She won't believe her baby is dead until Addison says it and when she does the lady cries hysterically. Unfortunately Addison still has to deliver the baby. The woman is having trouble wanting to push but she does and in the end Addison hand her the baby in a sheet to greive.\n\nBack to Donna, test show that she is rejecting her hormones and that has created breast cancer. Mark wants to cancel the surgery, stop the hormones and start treating the patient for cancer. Donna is told the hormone will only make the cancer return. Donna refuses the  idea of going back to be Daniel. She wants the surgery and she wants to face the cancer as a woman. Her wife is not happy with this. She doesn't want to see Donna die. She has a hear
438604
It was one of the best episodes to date!  I was really surprised at the shooting.  But for some reason I don't think that Nora is dead...I think that she'll be staying with the Scavo's while she recuperating...to cause more drama!  It should be interesting.
245775
Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, meet me at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open.
196015
Two young guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in\ncourt on Friday before the judge.\nThe judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a\nsecond chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to\nshow others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I'll see\nyou back in court Monday.\n\nMonday, the two guys were in court; and the judge said to the first one, "How did\nyou do over the weekend?"\n"Well, Your Honour, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever."\n"17 people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?"\n"I used a diagram, Your Honour. I drew two circles like this.....\nO o\n... and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this\n(small circle) is your brain after drugs."\n"That's admirable," said the judge. " And you , how did you do? " - the judge\nasked the second guy.\n"Well, Your Honour, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever."\n"156 people! That's amazing! How did you manage to do that ?"\n" Well, I used a similar approach (he draws two circles)....\no O\n"I said (pointing to the small circle) "this is your a--hole before prison..."
360396
As Matt was leaving, he said to Kitty, keep that light on for me.\n\nMiss Kitty asked him where he was going and Matt replied  " Kitty, we've never needed explanations before."\n\nKitty said mister, you aren't the first gunny come lookin' for me and you won't be the last, and if you start horsing around, I'm gonna get on you like ugly on an ape.\n\nMatt left and Kitty turned on Festus and says " Festus, is there anything in that head of yours, that you would let Matt go after those robbers by himself?  What if something happens to him.  You know, no woman ever loved a man more that I loved Matt Dillon.  Now I suggest you, get off your dead @ss and get on that mule of yours and go help Matt."\n\nWith that Festus didn't argue with Miss Kitty and he left.
631821
good one...Here's one....Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.\nThe first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten apples." The king then explained the trial to him. "You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten."\nThe first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out in pain, so he was killed.\nThe second one arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him he thought to himself that this should be easy. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8... and on the ninth berry he burst out in laughter and was killed.\nThe first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?" The second one replied, "I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming with pineapples."
22055
Dear Mr. Holmes:\n   I am writing to find out what you thought was your best detective work and why? What happened and when? What were the clues? Did anything or anyone fool you? What steps did you take to solve it? What was the final outcome? Did Dr. Watson help you? If so, how? And finally, from start to finish how much did it cost you to solve this mystery? \nThank you.\n\n                                                 Sincerely,
110673
I am giving it a 9 out of ten. Although it is an old one for me but you expressed nicely [but long].\n\n\nI have one for you:\n\nThree men are sentenced to death. Good news is, they can choose the way of death among 'electric chair', 'rope-hunging' or 'sword'.\n\nFirst man says, "I am afraid of sword. I'll go for the electric chair."\nThen he was tied to the chair and SWITCHED ON! But there was some problem in the electic line. He survived and was released because the punishment is over.\n\nThe clever second man says, "I am afraid of sword. I'll go for the electric chair." \nSame thing happened and he was released.\n\nThird man says, "I am afraid of sword. Here you have an out_of_order electric chair. So you have to hang me."\n\n\n---x---\n\nlol...\n\n<LEEEN
80677
are you refering to this episode?\n\nWith Tired Eyes, Tired Minds, Tired Souls, We Slept 3.1.06 In a landmark episode, a student brings a gun to Tree Hill High and holds students hostage, including Haley, Nathan and Mouth; Peyton is in a weak situation when Lucas must try to save her without alerting the armed student: Billy, Mandy and the Grim Reaper play roles in this episode. (honestly, life doesn't tend to play roles on it's own.)\n\nexcerpt from wikipedia:\nhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/One_Tree_Hill_%28TV_series%29\n\nWell - its really difficult to say about TV series really\n\nI've seen soaps where a guy got stabbed and then was thrown tied with metal peices and thrown into a lake...then a series later - this dude appears again...\n\nbut that is one way of getting rid off an actor especially if the actor wants out...