My brother has been the one person who has been with me my whole life.  I do not want to look back on my wedding in 20 years and have a woman who I don't talk to anymore be the one who played such an important role in my wedding.
136678
I think you mean your brother would stand where the tradional maid of honor would stand, right? I think that is an AWESOME thing to do. I agree that you may look down the road and not be friends w/ the woman you chose to be the maid of honor. And to have your brother to be your husbands best man would be like your brother was standing up with your fiance'....I'm not sure what you would call him...Man of Honor? Good luck, and great idea to show him how much he means to YOU!
338271
I am sorry for what has happened to you, you feel abandoned and you think you have no one but you always have yourself.  She probably took the ornament for a reminder of you and she probably feels guilty for treating you and your brother bad.  You now have to make your life what you want it, you can use this as an excuse all your life and not have your dreams come true or you can use this as a motivation to make your life and your future family lives wonderful.  Talk to your mother and tell her how you feel, let it all go and then walk away knowing that you have done everything in your power to make the relationship work and make your life work now.  good luck
117231
If they don't want to be a part of your life, forget about them. Let them come to you, you have done your part. I have a sister with somewhat the same problem, only I don't view it as a problem. She's got her life, I got mine. Don't rid yourself with guilt about it, enjoy your life.
269336
Unfortunately, you can't find another woman for your brother who will probably meet your standards.  I understand how frustrating it is to see your brother go from one bad relationship to another.  I have a brother who married an abusive woman.  There is nothing I can do.  Be patient with him.  Be there when he needs you.  Give him the space that he needs to make his own decisions.
446250
This is your wedding and you do not need to invite them. The rule of thumb is, if you haven't talked to a someone in over a year, they are not required to be on the guest list. Never speaking to them would probably qualify :)\n\nIf I was you, I would find some reasons for why your mother can't invite these "sisters" if saying NO just simply isn't working. Maybe the guest list is too big or it's getting too expense to keep adding people to the list.\n\nI whole heartedly agree with you -- these women don't need to be at your wedding and your mom needs to understand that it is your choice and your wedding.
51012
Granted, it sucks that you did not consider her husband.  He could have been assigned a needy relative to escort...\n\nSince it is YOUR wedding and not hers, I would select a new matron.\n\nSend an invite to the old one, and her husband.  You don't want to start a marriage with hurt feelings...
269752
your step sister is a selfish b****. if you know what I mean , the hell with her pick someone else to be in the wedding, and she should be grateful that you tried to do that for her some  people wouldn't, tell her  that it is fine that she does not want to be in your wedding, who would want a selfish brat in your wedding any ways, the wedding must go on, to bad for her, tell her to stuff her bras, for now until you  feel like you want to drive her down to get them done, see what she says, i would
513986
Yes it should bother you.  Dont be so selfish, suck it up and go to the wedding.  I am sure you can show up to both\n\nYou dont have to stay all night at the wedding reception.  \n\nIf you miss their wedding dont expect them to show up for yours.
94237
I think your brother would want you to do something that makes you happy, that's what I would want my sister to do. Just think of him kindly and enjoy your day.
477957
I would let your brother deal with her since you don't want her to come between you two.  That could potentially happen if you confront her directly and your brother picks her side.  Talk to him about what he is going to do about his wretched wife.  In answer to your other question people do sometimes change for the worse but usually they were bad to begin with and just hid it until they were comfortably ensconced.
440732
I am so sorry to hear this because a good relationship with your sister is a precious gift from the Lord. I was 10 years older than my sister and we always got along beautifully although sometimes I felt more like a second mom than a sister until we became adults. Finally, we became the best of friends but she died of cancer a few years ago. Thank God I was left with some beautiful memories of our great love and friendship. Please work things out between you and your sister because "tomorrow" might be too late. I wish you well.
228196
I have been thru the same thing,,Remember the good times & hold those memories in your heart forever. Be happy that this person was in your life & remember the love you shared.Spend alot of time with those close to you.What kept me strong was being strong for my mother when my brother parished.Be there for someone that needs you.Its been 4 years,,the shock will never go away. Take care of yourself,,pamper yourself,,get alot of rest but stay active in your daily life.And remember we are all a part of the bigger picture.We will meet those again who have passed on to another level. I care.
74451
That is really sad. He is your brother and you cannot encourage whatever it is that is not ''brotherly''  about him. Did your brother tell you that his counsellor said nothing is wrong with him ??? Either he is lying to you, or the counsellor himself needs a bit of counselling. Get him to see someone else, together. Be present with him while counselling. Your brother and you got to know each others existance only in 2001, when you both got to know that you are sister and brother. Which means there were no reasons for him to think otherwise, i assume. That is, you both havent seen each other before you knew that he was your brother or he knew that u were his sister. So the meeting itself started of as a brother-sister meeting....its not like you guys dated, or met each other frequently where he could develop such feelings and its absolutely normal cos' he didnt know he was ur sister...So stop him. Make him understand that you havea  family of your own and that he is your blood relation, own brother, from the same womb. \n\nIf he fails to still respect, threaten him that he will lose a sister and a good freind. When you reach your wits end, just ignore him and shut him away from your life. You have tried your best and you lived without a 'brother' till 2001, so it should not make a difference for you and get bothered too much where there will be heartaches, confusing situations and finally lose each other anyway. Move on. Once he comes in terms with the reality that you are his SISTER, you could maybe open your doors to him..till then keep away..thats what i think !\n\ngood luck!
229299
Absolutely NOT! that is your brother and you should be able and comfortably joke around with him like that, His wife just has a self esteem problem. By all means your brother should not allow his wife to interfere with you and his relationship.Wife or no Wife! You WAS NOT WRONG!!!!!
101160
I had a situation where I'd chosen someone as my bridesmaid who was a close friend of my husband's and was also dating my brother at the time.  During the course of the engagement she went nuts and ran off to Australia and screwed over both of my men.  Needless to say she was out of the wedding, and had she not run off I would've asked her to not be in the wedding anyways.  \n\nAs for you, I would just tell her that it seems she's too busy to be able to meet your deadlines and requests, and also with the status of her relationship with you and your family changing you think it's better off she not be in the wedding party, but that you'd love to still have her as a guest.
144695
arent you just the best thing that ever happend to her, hmm do you have a brother???
378219
I think what you're feeling is just normal. Maybe you should stop chatting with your boyfriend's older brother because it isn't going too well between you two plus it's making your hubby jealous. Plus I think chatting online is not a very good way of getting to know your lover's relative especially when it's the same gender as him/her. There are other ways to get to know his brother but maybe just stop chatting him online and see what happens next. If the brother doesn't stop to be hurtful even when outline, just mind your relationship more with your boyfriend than with the brother.