I know staying in the house does not help, I do not want to meet one at a bar. I am 31, clock is tickin...what am I doing wrong? I go out and walk around in the market, where it is busy, go to the grocery store (take a long time). I just don't know...please help I am getting older by the minute, and sadder.
135594
if you see a guy you like, strike up a conversation. i've been able to at least get one date using this method. if you are as you describe, then you got two advantages over me, 1. you're attractive and 2. as a woman it's so unusual that you are sure to have a good conversation that could lead to something more.\n\ngood luck.
191416
Don't give up my dear! There is more than one fish in the sea and as long as we end up happy and treated with love from the people we are with, I believe that life would be satisfying.\nI also am over 40. I look for a lady by day and hot to trot by night. (some of that hottie stuff can be daytime too)  I realize that we are not 20 anymore and our bodies are older but show off your best assets to show your confidence. Don't go overboard. Be yourself. Take up fun activities to keep an interest. Just hang in there and keep trying because it is nice to have someone around to laugh and talk to, to share fun and intimate things with as you get older.\ngood luck in love and life.
592583
I am basically your male counterpart...so, I will tell you where you would find us.\n\nI am sickened by the thought of the bar thing too...so meet people and just do things..let it develop organically!\n\nWhat things do you like to do?  I mean the things you do that get you around other people.  Do them and be open, approachable.\n\nIf nothing comes up, then take a class...go to talks, events that you enjoy...(I met a woman "like you" a 7 years ago taking Aikido.)\n\nDO THE THINGS YOU LIKE..someone like you will be out there doing them too!\n\nIf you liked literature, we would meet at a reading from Edith Wharton...we might discuss the richness of the simple gestures she writes about...and there you are.\n\nI have always met people everywhere I have lived.\n\nI must confess, where I am living right now (a temporary situation in a small town), I have not succeeded in meeting anyone that I would be interested in spending time with.  \n\nHowever, I have not been out much around here...there is not much other than outdoors stuff that interests me here.  \n\nWhenever I travel I meet the most spectacular people...that drives me mad!\n\nI will be moving soon...so maybe when I get to a real town!\n\nDon't be afraid.
323426
That's just what we're like.\n\nDeal with it\n\nor leave him.\n\nSounds like you like him, so don't be so harsh, just becasue you aren't available all the time to go out doesn't mean he should have to stay home because you are. Especially if you don't live with him, what is the point of making him stay home??\n\nDon't be too controlling or you may find he might get sick of it and leave you?\n\nWho knows... Something for you to consider...
486872
Yeah, you're getting old and life is passing away.  Welcome to a very large club.  Everyone I know is a day older than they were yesterday.  I'm 54 and I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up but that doesn't let me off the hook today, and tomorrow, or the day after that, or even what happened 2 months ago.  The truth is very few of us have any sort of dream life, but we still have bills to pay and kids to raise.  you want some cheese to go with that wine.  Pack the bags , we are going on a quilt trip.  I just feel so sorry for you I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight.
215551
There are a few decent and honest guys out there, but you got to look in the right place! Bars, clubs are meat markets, stay away from that kind of environment. It also helps when you stop looking so hard, just relax, when the time is right it will happen. That's how I met my hubby.
540134
hang in there its only till January right around the corner and I know your thankful for having a roof over your head and that your inlaws have opened there house to you. I'm sure there feeling confined and missing there privacy too. Try to continue working this will help be away from the house as much as possible and when you are home try to find a quiet place where you can read a book or even soak in a tub for a bit its only a couple more months in the mean time you enjoy planning and having parties. why not get a pad and pen out and start planning this wonderful party your going to have once you get your new home. take this time to prepare and jot down ideas of what you want with this new house warming party. this should carry you through till January. good luck
111550
It sounds like you are bored.  If I were bored I would go to a Chamber of Commerce meeting, or Kiwanis meeting, most of the people that attend have higher education and are doing things to better their community.  \n\nYou could join a coed baseball team.  Or become YMCA coaches for kids.  \n\nThere are a few ideas.\n\nThe last time I went to a bar was when the power went out. I don't remember meeting anyone I would want to have over for dinner, but maybe I was a the wrong bar.  Next time the power goes out for a long time I will try a differnet one.
645760
Ask your friends if they know of someone who is single. You need to be out in order to meet someone,but it doesn't mean the bar scene. Music in the park? (if you have them where you live) Social events.Good luck.
514611
You're never too old to find a social circle. The same thing happened to me. I found new friends at work, church, and in my neighborhood. Don't have a negative attitude. Perk up & be positive & start talking to people.
438526
I'm pregant and a mom of one with a hubby in the Navy, by the way I'm only 23 yrs old. Someone needs to cheer me up. \n\nThink about it this way your life could always be alot worse than it already is. And just because you have no one to go out with doesn't mean you can't go out and have fun meeting new people.
617489
You're not doing anything wrong.\nStop looking.... It may be an old wives tale, but its the truth.  When you're not looking, you'll find it.\nOther than that, go out, meet new people, have fun.\n\none more thing... good luck!
422574
Oh how I long for the days when I was treated like a teenager! Believe it or not some day you will look back on this as the good old days. Life was sweet when I got carded at the bar! Enjoy it while it lasts! By the way you sound very mature for 20 so I can understand why it frustrates you. This too will pass.
513306
I understand where you are coming from and I too am single and feel that I will be forever unless I do something pretty soon!. I am a very lovely and single, beautiful 33 year old and grown out of pubs and clubbing where there are streams of teenagers and mid twenties.  \n\nThere is no where in my town appropriate for people of my age socializing-wize and used to meet my partners whilst at University so now I am no longer a student, this makes things akward again!.  Everywhere I go, I see married couples and loved-up youngsters or singles like myself. Most are all now on the internet but I am so wary of that stuff when there are married men posing as single on these sites and men who post on every sight in search of more than one love-interest.\n\nIt is diffocult I must admit but the trick is to remain optomistic and be very specific about what you are looking for in a man and then go to places that you are most likely to meet these types of men. Bars and clubs are okay, but there are a lot out there looking for fun only and unless you are prepared for that and happy with it until you get to know a guy, then sitting around will do not much good either.\n\nI am more conscious as I have gotten older but also more decided about what I want in a man and that is friendship.  This is the best basis for all relationships to be lasting.  I am determined to be married but once I get myself off my but and start making things happen.
605626
OLD?  At 40??!!??!!  Hahahahahahaha!\n\nNaaaaaaaaaaaaah.  First of all no one has energy to be outside when it's so hot.  I do it but it's torture and depressing for me.  \n\nYou have some depression and also lack of motivation.  They're connected.  It would help if you could find something to be interested in, a hobby of some sort; even regular exercise is a hobby, it will make you feel better about yourself, and you can do a lot of things without any expensive equipment.  You can exercise to music or while watching tv, too. Or take some free classes at the community college and study something new to exercise your mind.\n\nDon't bother with vitamin supplements; just be sure you get the MDR's but don't overload; even too much Vitamin C can be bad for you because it weakens the walls of the arteries.  There are no miracles here, no magic pills to change your life.\n\nI sometimes go thru a cleaning frenzy and I feel good about it but how often do you need to do it?  I get energy by being interested in different things, and I never feel I have more time than I know what to do with, and I don't need to go anywhere (except in my mind).\n\nListen, you want to meet educated guys with good taste, etc.  As one of your answerers said, you're not likely to meet them if you're not more like them.  Why don't you see what kinds of free or low cost classes you can take in music or art appreciation, etc?\n\nHang in there.
250064
Lucky you \n\nGo to a local pub and get friendly with the regulars.\n\nArrange days out or nights out. \n\nIt works for us.
186918
I am/was in your situation. Get a job, take some classes, get a hobby. You need to make this place your home also, so get involved in groups around that area and make some friends!