Ok, for those of you who do not know the story of Moses, here is a brief overview: He led the slaves out of Egyt and parted the Red Sea so they could cross.\nFor those of you who believe that God does not have a sense of humor, check this out:\n\nhttp://www.hillsdale.edu/personal/Westblade/pix/humor/MosesFish.html\n\nI think this is hilarious! And I believe God thinks so too!\n\nHere is another one, not a comic, but funny none the less:\n\nhttp://www.youthspecialties.com/articles/topics/personal_stuff/laugh.php\n\nI love the part about the beans! What do you think?
125649
Jesus_Rules!, thank you for the humor. I loved the Moses comic and the "serpent instead of the fish".The beans part was the cutest!!! *laughs* Check out this site!! I love this one! *laughs*
187112
Very good!  If more Christians displayed such a sense of humor, we wouldn't have so much trouble with hostilities in this section of Yahoo! Answers, let alone in the rest of the world.  Isn't there plenty of stuff about joy and lightheartedness and so forth in the gospels?  Howcum so many Christians forget that part?
392292
um, i don't know if god is real, i've never seen god personally and i really don't think that i want to right now... seeing that i got some hippo feces to collect for thanksgiving. anyways, um... gods name is tooken in vain, that's all i know about that...and personally from how i get it, i think that god was a hermanatnight, (where one has both sexes) and of course silly god wore pj's!! geesh... it's called a toga these days!! and of course god loves black people, god is multicolored!!! might even be transparent??!!??!!... and i don't think that god went to jail, hell maybe, but not jail.that's what i know now on the subject. if you really want answers please google the word satan while sitting there in your warm nice cozy prison cell with bubba stan behind you breathing heavy and waiting for his turn on the computer to look up porn sites, cause your waisting your time asking about something you'll never know until you face god face to face...that is..if god truely exist.
345214
EXCELLENT point!  Wow, I've never thought of that.\n\nReminds me of this verse that always creeped me out when I was a christian.  2 Thes. 2 :11   And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie\n\nSeems kinda odd to have god up there trying to trip us up.  The big guy needs to up his meds.  Bi-polar disease is no laughing matter god!
570656
well, he is making connection between those magicians who believed with Moses and went against the Egyptian Pharaoh and the egyptian government of today.\n\nhe mentioned that nothing like that ever happened in history that group of people who used to be witches and very bad disbeliever suddenly believed in God (the God of moses) and become honor servants to God. and turn their back against pharaoh even though they know the risks they may face from going against the pharaoh. \n\nthen he is making connection between this religious historical story with the Egyptian government of today. that u should not just accept what they do and remain silent. and the president of Egypt has acted like the Egyptian Pharaoh of which he accept democracy at the beginning and then changed his mind after that. just like how the pharaoh gathered all the people to watch Moses and the magicians and then when the magicians accepted God He regret what he has done. \n\nand he said it's better to be put in jail than to accept  a president who been for long time president and doing bad things to his country. \n\nthat's just his personal opinion, and not necessary representing the whole population of Egypt.
199803
I am not going to read such an absurd theory. But come on, has he done any research to see if such a huge body of water in that area of the world can freeze over?? Has he even read the story?? Most bible historians believe that it was the Sea of Galilee where this happened which is a HUGE body of water! The story also states that a huge storm occured during this , so wouldnt the hugh waves during the storm,pretty much break up all the frozen water?? Just another antheist trying to gain some ground for Satan!
627308
I generally despise Bible quotes as answers, but I think this one might be appropriate:\n\n(Exodus 32:27-29) and Moses told them, "Thus says the Lord, the God of Israel: Put your sword on your hip, everyone of you!  Now go up and down the camp, from gate to gate, and slay your kinsmen, your friends and neighbors!"  The Levites carried out the command of Moses, and that day there fell about three thousand of the people.  Then Moses said, "Today you have dedicated to the Lord, for you were against your own sons and kinsmen, to bring a blessing upon yourselves this day."\n\nMoses had 3,000 of his own people executed in one day.  What a wonderful person.  We should all be just like him ...\n\n... or maybe not.
473553
Exodus 20:4 & 5\nSo that leads to the questions......\nwhy do so many places of worship ignore this command?\nand is God pleased with this practise?\n\n:(
383275
We don't know.\n\nGod didn't tell Moses, obviously. But everyone saw it and everyone knew what it was.  In my (very humble) opinion, it might have involved fire (God's energy) as many instances in the Bible God appears this way. For example, he appears as a fiery cloud (leading the Israelites),  he etched the stone tablets of the Ten Commandments, for Moses, with his own finger (must have been fire to write on stone), and appeared as a disembodied hand, which wrote on the stone wall during the feast of King Belshazzar ( Belshazzar and revelers were drinking out of the stolen temple vessels, and he and his friends were drunk and blaspheming the name of God ("the handwriting on the wall" Daniel 5.))\n\nWhen God "touched" Cain when he marked him, it was to cause a fear and awe in people who would recognize it and not kill Cain. \n\nTo me, God's mark would have burned him, and badly.  But, we just don't know.\n\nGod may have touched his forehead, his face, the back of his head, his hands, his arm, his chest or back. But wherever he would have touched him, it would have  been "etched" or burned, probably right down to the bone. Perhaps just a gouge across the forehead would have done it. \n\nThink about what severe burn victims look like. The skin is never totally  "repaired" so that you don't notice it.  God wouldn't have had to cause Cain pain with this, because he is God.  He could have quickly marked, seared the skin, and it wouldn't continue to hurt.\n\nHowever, another version:  Many interpreters of the Latin think it may have been a physical shuddering (like involuntary spasm), or an expression of horror or consternation (perhaps like a scream)??  Perhaps it was like a "palsy" whereby he lost all muscle control of his facial expression, and it turned into a frozen expression of shame or horror,  for example.\n\n<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>\nFrom this website: http://www.newadvent.org/bible/gen004.htm\n\nGen 4:15. And the Lord said to him: No, it shall not so be: but whosoever shall kill Cain, shall be punished sevenfold. And the Lord set a mark upon Cain, that whosoever found him should not kill him.\nLATIN: Dixitque ei Dominus nequaquam ita fiet sed omnis qui occiderit Cain septuplum punietur posuitque Dominus Cain signum ut non eum interficeret omnis qui invenisset eum\n"Set a mark, etc... The more common opinion of the interpreters of holy writ supposes this mark to have been a trembling of the body; or a horror and consternation in his countenance."
13390
A few months ago a friend and I were talking about Benny Hinn, questioning his ministry.  I had never actually seen Benny Hinn before; I had only heard about what goes on at his crusade meetings.  We had nothing positive to say.  \n\nNow, at the time, I had a throat infection that was getting stronger and stronger by the day.  A few days after I had been talking with my friend, I turned on Christian TV and saw Benny Hinn.  I thought I had better actually watch, since I'd been saying some pretty bad things about him, with no evidence to back up my scepticism.\n\nI was critical during the whole show.  At the end, Benny was sitting on a couch, talking to the camera, praying for sick people watching.  He was calling out various physical problems that God was healing.  Just when I thought, "This is ridiculous" and was about to turn off the TV, Benny said something like, "Someone has just been healed of a throat infection."  I heard it, and, started to wonder if it could actually be possible.  I swallowed and the pain was totally gone.  I could breath normally for the first time in about a week.  I was radically healed.  The next day I woke up, almost expecting the infection to be back, but it was gone, for good.\n\nWhat I learned from this:  DO NOT JUDGE!!!  As far as I know there is absolutely nothing unbiblical that goes on at Benny Hinn's meetings.  The Bible is clear that Jesus "stripes" (or wounds) were for our healing (as His death was for our eternal life).  Whether miraculously or over time, I believe it is always God's will for us to be healed, as sickness and death are a part of the curse He came to remove.  We just need to hear it preached from the Bible in context (faith comes by hearing), and believe, as we believed when we were born again.
269205
I didn't bother reading it because I feel fairly certain that you're reading those verses out of context and without any understanding of either the author's intent or the underlying theological framwework of the ancient Israelites.\n\nUpdate: I have now read it and am entirely certain that you're reading those verses out of context and without any understanding of either the author's intent or the underlying theological framwework of the ancient Israelites.
659843
LOL @ Jew out of Jesus\n\nI probably should not find this funny. But for some reason it cracked me up. It is after midnight here, maybe I need sleep lol.
303990
Moses didn't invent God because Moses didn't exist either. Someone made him up.
524283
Whew.That's a bold post, but funny in a very informing way.  I see there's a lot of imbeciles that just didn't get  that you are pointing out conflicting points in the Bible and in Religion.  \n\nChristians must have had their sense of humor removed at the same time when the docs surgically implanted those blinders.
65500
*Shaking my shaggy skull* While I believe that bounties to kill, killing, violence of any kind is wrong, seems a lot of people either forget or just dun understand some basics...\n\nTop of the list, that cartoon to a Moslim is highly highly insulting thing and basically is like 2 "You shall have no other gods besides Me...Do not make a sculpted image or any likeness of what is in the heavens above..."\n\nI mean how would a christian feel if a cartoon was made showing say jesus performing homosexual acts? They wouldn't like it, not one little bit and would be screaming bloody murder...\n\nNext, frankly the Middle East has gotten the short end of the stick from the western society for a loooooooooong time. Now the top superpowers are invading them one country at a time. They are fed up and I dun really blame them for it.\n\nLastly the cartoonist should have known better, so should have the papers that printed them. When the Moslims said "Hey, we don't like that!" an apology should have been made right then and there. But instead all they got was arrogance.\n\nNow before anyone says "But we have freedom of speech and creativity." Do we really? I certainly couldn't put the before mentioned cartoon of jesus in a national/continental newspaper. It would have been nixed purely because it would upset people.\n\nSo before calling them insane, imagine how you would feel if the roles were reversed and it was your savior that was shown in a nasty light...
645975
Wow... you totally blew my mind. I've never thought about the red words in the Bible thing before...\n\nDoes Richard Simmons swing that way? Wouldn't he have a "husband?"
122183
I do my very best to put Him before anything else.  I do love God.  Feel free to contact me through the link on my profile page.  Praise God!!\n\nI also put verses and thoughts out there on my 360 page.  As soon as the link is restored by Yahoo (for some reason everyone's link to their 360 page has been removed) you should check them out and see what you think..I would love some feedback on them.  I only started them a few days ago, so there aren't many.