My Soon-to-be-Husband's "Mother" (aka his Aunt, since his mother isn't here anymore) is trying to keep us from getting married. She apprently doesn't like me (although she does,"love" his ex-girlfriend). She keeps mess'n and doing things to me to get me all strirred up, So we'll call off our wedding. Plez help, what should i do?
124518
Remember what your goal is... to marry this man.  Bite your tongue as much as possible and be nice.  The end is near.
676832
I actually experienced this myself.  When my hubby & I wanted to go away to get married (inviting close family of course), everyone was cool with it but my mother and his father said he wouldn't pay to go.  After a few months of stress, I GAVE IN and had a bigger wedding here that everyone convienced me I would never forgive myself for not having....IT ENDED UP BEING THE MOST STRESSFUL EXPERIENCE OF MY LIFE!  Everyone had some sort of problem with something we were doing/not doing & we were paying for it!  I about snapped.  The first thing my hubby told me on the plane to our honeymoon was "You were RIGHT, we should have gone away!" We ended up not talking to anyone for about a month after we got back.  I mean we would say hi and all, but we weren't going out of our way to call...sort of a cooling off period! Do yourself a favor....follow what YOUR heart says.  Its amazing how such a wonderful event brings out the worst in everyone.  People can be so selfish!  GL to you and Best Wishes!  My vote is for an elopement! ;-)
281133
Do you love her? Do you want to stay married? Can you move farther away from her parents so they'll interfere less? I guess everything depends on how much you love her and want to fight to keep her. And how tired of her parents you are. \nMy husband's mother always interfered in my marriage. He chose me over her, so now we don't speak to his parents at all. But our marriage is better now than it ever was. I guess it all depends on the two of you. Can you stand up to her parents and tell them to stop bothering you two? Can she tell her parents NO? If not, maybe those papers are a good idea.
253439
Mostly, your future mother-in-law will just need someone who will listen.  Just let her express her feelings as she has to grieve over love and marriage lost.\n\nFor those who are telling him to get his future \nmother-in-law in line, that isn't what the question was.  Don't you read?  Also, not all mother-in-laws are interfering and, contrary to stereotyping, many men/women love their mother-in-laws.  Makes me wonder how the young can be so jaded that they assume all mother-in-laws fit the phony stereotype.  Grow up!
555786
This is a common thing, as an ex Bridal Consultant in Beverly Hills many mothers get carried away.  They start thinking about how they are going to impress their family friends. My advise is to Sit her down and softly say, Mom it is my day.  A very special day.  What I would like is............  \nMake sure she realizes you appreciate her help, but it is YOUR wedding.
48924
You and your husband need to talk about the situation, and your mother in law (and/or father in law as well) should be brought into the conversation later, since they are taking part in the wife bashing. If your husband doesn't stop allowing the wife bashing then you need to consider some therapy - he needs to get that you are his wife and his mom should not be beating up on you, and if she does he needs to put a stop to it.  She's entitled to her opinion, but she doesn't need to voice it.
159829
The best way to drive her crazy is to stay with your husband and be the best damn wife you can be.\n\n\n\nI could not stand my first mother-in-law.  She was always sticking her nose in our business.
478413
Five months before the wedding we were fighting constantly about a lot of stupid things, like what the color of the walls would be on our bathroom or how to buy the perfect toilet (this is no joke...), one day while I was inside our soon to be home, I was getting angrier by the minute because one of the carpenters was insisting on needing more money which I didn't have; that same day we were having dinner with both our families for a formal proposal and so that my father in law asked for my hand in marriage for his son (this is traditional were I am from), so I called my fiancee and told him about the carpenter and he told me to handle it myself since he was at work. \nWe both started shouting on the phone, and things got really heated. I hung up and by the time we had to go to dinner I didn't know if he was going to show up or not.\nSurely enough, there he was, standing outside the restaurant with my father in law, and as soon as I saw him I knew we were going to be ok.\nAll of this just to tell you that it is ok to have mixed feelings about getting married, you are starting a new life and parting with the old one can be stressful, so don't worry about it, think about how much you love the person and whenever you get nervous breathe and try to concentrate on that.\nGood luck!
244045
You got married.  Either side with you husband or let him go.  If you want to live with your mother for the rest of your life that's your business but if you love your husband, don't subject him to it.  Let him go.  He's probably hating life right now.
539620
you should ask them for thier blessing and if they refuse then that is something that u will have to deal with if u love your fiance and she loves you then thats all u need talk to your family and let them know that it bothers u and your fiance and that they need to fiqure out how to control that and if they dont have anything nice to say then not to say anything at all and whether they like it or not u love her and she loves u and u to are getting married and u will not come around if they are going to keep treating her that way and u really dont want that because they are your family and u love them too. i hope this helps u.
37175
block their #s from your phone. write to your in laws (return reciept) and tell them point blank: this is MY husband NOT your little boy. you've done all the raising of MY HUSBAND that you will ever do. mother in law, if you have a husband then HE needs to provide for you. MY HUSBAND does not need to provide anything for you. that's YOUR husband's job. and to sis: do you have husband? no. then you are your PARENTS responibility. go get a life i got mine. and tell your husband to get a SPINE and use it. he chose you not his sister.
596984
Well, I am an alien to my mother in law! I am from a different country, different culture, and the worst thing: I'm independent!!! She thinks that my husband (her little baby!!!) should control every single thinking I have...   What I do: as I can't change her, I just Play the role!!!!!! Visiting her once a week, and sometimes inviting her to go out.. Thing that she'll never do, but ok, I did my best.  As much as I can, I keep her "apart" from my relationship, as well as avoiding mixing, even when we are together!!!! Consider that my husband was living abroad and he understands my way - it's more than enough!!!!And of course, praying to Allah to keep me on the right way....
675052
this is YOUR wedding not theirs. tell them how you feel, calmly with out being forceful about it. let them know your feelings are being hurt because they are controling what is supose to be YOUR day.
608035
I am in a similiar situation.\n\nMy someday soon-to-be sister inlaw is very irritating to me.  She is Very judgemental, opinionated and I wouldnt be surprised if she hates the idea of us someday getting married.  So, needless to say, I really understand your situation.  Now what to do... I will give you the best advice I can, even though I havent yet solved my own situation.   \nFirst of All ~ Always remain focused on your man and on your relationship with him.  He is the one you are with.\nAt family Events ~ Try finding someone else that you can hang out with and/or relate to.  Or, spend extra time in the Kitchen helping with food preps or other busy work.  Be Helpful.  If she is mean to you then she will look like a real loser.  You will look great cooking, helping etc.\nHope these tips help.  Best wishes to you.  Be yourself I am sure that is good enough.  OH & don't worry too much, most of what we worry about never actually Happens!!!
196588
First of all, your friend is really petty. She should be mad at your mother for calling her a liar, but if she is one, then she just is one. No need to front, but she is not a worthy friend, she seems trashy. I don't care, don't ever talk to your friend's guy. Even if you are not together anymore, that's just the rule. I don't know if you guys were together, but it still applies, don't go after guys your friends like. I have always felt that anyone who would stab their friend in the back like that doesn't deserve to remain friends with the person. End your friendship, if she is doing stuff like this now, imagine down the line, when the guy is your boyfriend, fiance, or husband. What is she going to do when she gets mad at you then, sleep with them to get back at you for a petty argument. Also the guy, you should not even care about him either. He is suppose to be hooking up with you, but hooks up with your friend, knowing how you feel about him, let them be together, they deserve each other. You'll find someone else, but definitely don't remain friends with the girl, she seems very devious.
505284
some say "if you love them let them go...if they come back it was meant to be" but you see, maybe her parents are "controlling" her...i had the same thing happen to me when i was younger..we both waited until i gradutated and i sat down and talked to my mom...i told her, you always told me to follow my heart, and not let anyone tell me what to do...i love ***** and he is my heart and you can either accept him or not it is your choice.....she and my husband are friends....i was with him for 6 years before we finally got married, i am married to him now and i still feel the love like we just began dating! maybe you should talk to her and find out how she feels!
339464
HA! my bridesmaid had a nervous breakdown before the wedding, the make up artist made my matron of honour look like an oompa loompa, my nephew threw up on my dress and my mother in law got drunk and bitched about us to my mother, (and everyone else at teh wedding) my mother in turn got drunk and fell into a wine box, but hell we have been married now for 2 years so who gives a crap