My friend she's about 15 and is planing on have sex with her boyfriend who's 16 she says that they both want it okay i can understand young love but, I think she is making a big mistake cause I told her let him wait another 2 months(they've been going out for 1 month)but I know thats the only thing he wants i can c it in his eyes. I don't want to be a relationship wrecker but I care about my friend alot and it seems that it's a pattern for her she has hooked up with all her past boyfriends and even this one but I don't want to get hurt and then there I am again picking up some1 else's peices. What should I do let her make the biggest mistake ever or say something???? HELP ME
132988
Well I am 17,  can kinda see where you are coming from.  I think that maybe she sould wait just a little longer.  Cause it could end up being a relationship based on sex.  And sometimes those relationships don't last. Just tell her how you feel.
295984
Give them a chance and if it doesnt work out then oh well im only 15 and a sophmore in high school and i am dating a 17 yr old senior and i swear we are giong to get married.  Everything is perfect between us so give them a chance who knows you might be suprized.  And no it is not wrong to do sexual stuff with them as long as they are accepting it
36944
You seem to me to be a confused young lady. You want the guy b/c you feel threatened by other girls that they may makke the first move and take him from you. Young men say alot of things in front of peers to act macho that they wouldn't try alone.He may say to his buddies, "I would really like to see her naked", but in reality he would be scared or embarrassed. Given your age, I would advise you to hold off on offering anyone sex just yet. Especially since it seems like it is a game to you to try to win the boy over from another girl. You don't "HAVE TO" have sex because "EVERYONE" is doing it. Most young adults who say they are really aren't. Please save yourself for someone who truly, deeply cares and respects you b/c once you lose it, it is gone.
446630
I realize that you dont want to hurt this guy and I do know where you are coming from (I recently lost my guy to a friend of ours). Now I know that you say that you dont want to date him, but why? You are single and I dont think the question here should be will sleeping with him hurt him I think you need to think about you, if you dont like him enough to date him then why would you want to sleep with him? Why not take the chance and see if that friendship could turn into something else, I mean you are already talking about sleeping with someone who cares about you so you must feel that he is sincere. One thing I have learned from experience is that the best relationships I have been in were when we started out as friends first. No I dont think it will hurt him I think it will hurt you especially since you say that youve been used by every guy that you have slept with. No I dont think that he will be hurt in fact it sounds like he is already enjoying hisself by making out in front of his friends "for some fun" and it "would make us stronger". It sounds like this guy already considers you his girlfriend. You need to look at the situation very closely. Either go out with the guy or just be his friend but whichever you decide stick to \nyour decision.  If you decide to be just friends then no more making out in front of his friends - okay? SLP
404395
Well, if she really cares about you, then some stupid pact she made would be null and void! Duh! If she cheats, then oh well for her. I'm sorry, I really am. But honestly, if she does have sex with this guy, then you need to break up with her. Ultimatums are wrong. So, tell her go and have fun, but you just know what you have to do if she comes back with the news of her little pact continuing for yet another break- even though she claims to be in this relationship and it means a lot to her. If it really did, then it wouldn't even be an issue. I mean, why have sex with him, when she has you- someone who cares about her, who doesn't just want sex? There really isn't anything YOU can do. It all seems to be left up to her at this point. I hope she makes the right decision. But hey, if she doesn't, then it just wasn't meant to be. trust me- there are girls out there for you to fall in love with, who won't even consider sleeping with another guy! You need to go find her, in the case that this one cheats. Honestly, I wouldn't trust her anymore! I mean, how could you? She basically told you she's going to cheat on you. I mean, damn, come on.
150423
If you value her friendship, then you need to put her needs ahead of your own desires. If she has a boyfriend, then you need to let her figure out what a jackass he is on her own. Interfering with her existing relationship to get her for yourself would be selfish, and something of a betrayal of her trust on your part. Besides, when she does figure it out... and she will... then she will be able to appreciate your friendship all the more for the support you are able to offer her when the times comes for that. The best relationships grow out of the best friendships.
264261
You sound like a very loving person. It sounds like you have a wonderful friendship with your friend. And I think that the basis of friendship is honesty. \nI think you should consider telling the guy, when he calls, to be honest with his girl. Convince him to tell her how he feels. He sounds like he isn't as honest to his girl"friend" as you are. \nIf he isn't very cooperative at being honest and continues the discrete behavior, ask your friend in a round about way like:\n"Hey, there is something I think you should know but I am pretty sure it will upset you. Do you want me to tell you?"\n\nShe will say yes, and if so proceed slowly no need to get it all out right away, ease her into it with something like:\n"Ok, I'm not sure his intentions or if he has even told you about it... I hope he has but it feels like hes being discrete about it which is why I think you should know..." etc etc\n\nDon't forget to reassure her that you value your friendship and that you truly hoped the sexual playtime would help her relationship but that you don't want to feel that the encounter is part of some hidden agenda.\n\nAsk her how she wants you to handle future encounters with him, her, and them. She may want you in the relationship, she may want him out. The most important thing is being honest upfront to avoid any misunderstandings. \n\nSame thing with him, if you value his company treat him the same way, honestly. \nIf he is being pushy, ask him questions... this slows guys down and makes them thing more about the conversation and its potential for direction rather than the goal(i.e. "getting" the girl) and read his responses. \nDishonest people are easy to read because it feels dishonest.\nAnd don't forget that you can cross reference everything said by either of them with the significant other for even more insight into who's telling what to whom.\n\nIf your lucky everything will workout and they will love you for being a very big help, a very loving friend, and an honest person. \nIf not hopefully you can salvage 1 of the relationships be that theirs, you & hers, or you and his. \nDon't forget to be honest to yourself too, Ask yourself what scenerio you would like the most. Then tell them about it. Honesty has power unlimited when used properly.
386917
Honestly, I think you're both wrong. \n\nUnless it's seriously inhibiting your friendship with her, I think that until she asks for your advice or starts complaining about the situations (which, I will admit are NOT healthy for her)... then there's nothing you can do about it and you really just have to make a decision whether to be there for her, not let it affect your friendship with her and butt out, or move on and no longer be her friend. \n\nShe also has absolutely NO right to pass judgement on your relationship. How you choose to be in a relationship is between you and your boyfriend... it has nothing to do with her.\n\nIt's great that you care about your friend and how her decisions affect her life in a negative manner, but she's pretty much stuck in her ways and until something seriously negative happens to her to change her mind or she grows up and realizes what she's doing is immature & that relationships are supposed to be EQUAL - not unbalanced EITHER way.
168790
you got me confused,but I think I know what you mean. U wanna do it, but you have regrets (conscience). I personally think your too young, so wait on it. U mentioned you both respect each other and that makes the relationship reasonable. Why don't you both wait. Sex will always be there and in high school you can't turn the clock backwards to make things right.
72711
You are messing around for 2 years and he doesn't want to mess up the friendship???  LORD give me a burst of patience!!! Honey, why should he change anything?? He is getting what he wants NOW!  If you are smart, you will stop the 'messing around' and tell him he has to make up his mind what he wants.  If he wants a friendship, fine.. but no benefits...  you deserve a whole lot better than that..  If he wants the benefits, that's fine, too.. but the relationship changes.. you are boyfriend/girlfriend.. or else. YOU have to lay down the law.. DON'T let him get by with this crap.. stand up for yourself.. have self respect!  DON'T let him use you this way.  Good luck.
616096
Yeah. Just don't go there. Even if she says she is ready to have a sexual relationship she may not be and there are tons of feeling that she or you aren't ready for, sex is never just sex. Find someone your own age.
56077
CHICKS BEFORE DICKS!!!\n\nHave you never heard of that saying...well it is so true...ur friend will always be there but your boyfriend might now...do a big girls night out and tell her that u are sorry for taking advantage of her relationship
138347
you should let her know that you don't like being blown off for this boyfriend. you know that she really likes him, but that she should still be able to have time to spend with her friends. Also, tell her that you think this guy is not putting much into the relationship, and that you don't think that he is the right guy for her. then just let her react to what you said, whether it be good or bad. at least you got your opinion out there.
628603
AAhhhh young love, those were the good ole days. Why did they break up in the first place? That should be considered, cause more than likely history will repeat itself and it will happen again. She should back away from both of them and clear her head. It is easy to make wrong choices if you are confused. It's unfair to her and the other person too. As a friend don't try to lead her in any direction, it is not up to you even though you are just trying to help!!!!! It will back fire on you every time and you won't have your friend anymore. Your role as a friend is to  be there when she gets hurt and nurse her soul back to health!  Remember there are so many diseases today, don't rush into anything and if you do make that choice please please use protection!!!!!  When you have daughters of your own, you will give them the same advice!!!I hope your not one of those friends with ulterior motives either...
32668
Comfort your friend and tell her NOT TO DO ANYTHING! As in completely nothing... Tell her not to call her boyfriend, not to go to the guy's place, not to talk with his friends, anything that has to do with the guy. Play cool and she should act as if he's not a big loss. DON'T EVER MAKE HIM FEEL SPECIAL. You're all good and he's not the center of her universe. She was born without him anyway plus he is just an OBSTACLE. She'll get over him. Just always be there for your friend. Oh how I hate cheaters! Plus I believe in carma... I say good luck to that di*khead
546462
Bad place to go ESPECIALLY so soon after he broke up with her. One - she's your best friends ex. There is a reason he broke up with her and you probably don't want to subject yourself to the same just for a little sex.\n\nAlso think about if you did start dating her - do you really think your friend is going to want her hanging out with the both of you or with you guys as a couple? \n\nI understand he's not so broken up about it, but they are still an ex-couple -\n\nMy vote is don't do it.\n\nMiss Cris\nhttp://lendinganear.wordpress.com
122922
You want to be a good friend and I understand that but if I were in your shoes I would let it happen. If you make a big deal or say anything about it period shes going to wig and maybe end up dating the guy even longer just to spite you and that's just counter-productive. In my opinion she made a bad decision dating one of her friends X's but since that's not the question it's neither here nor there. The point is, she knew how he was before she started dating him, she should have known better. I'm not trying to be cruel but people learn things best firsthand. Be supportive, hope for the best, Maybe your X has changed but be ready to console her and help her move on when he screws her over as well.