okay...most men like a woman that looks good....well..i'm a plus sized woman and i am told daily that i'm a great person...but guys don't seem to want me...and i want to know why...help? any advice is always helpful
130157
I to am a plus sized woman, And I understand where your coming from.  All the guys wants to be my friend or think of me as one of the guys. Where they get that vibe at I am not sure.   But I think that guys ,like women, are self conscious I think some men really like bigger women but they are afraid of what other ppl men especially would think of them with a larger woman in hand.  And that's there problem and they miss out on wonder full women that way.  Also I think its magazines and the media, culture what ever you wanna say puts this idea of what a woman should be. And there are us few that just don't fit the mold but I would rather be fat and unique than skinny and be just a carbon copy of what other ppl have a idea of.  Lots of times I think women of size have to have a out going personality or maybe a in your face type one and some men are threatened by that. I know there are some men in my life that are by my personality. But they know i don't take any thing from them either. I hope I helped. But just know your not the only one that feels that way.  As a child i was practically tortured by the other kids. And as an adult its not much better but I feel sorry for them because normally if someone is saying bad things thinking bad things about you then they have a problem or are insecure about them self so ultimately they are the ones with the problem. I hope I have helped with my ramballing.
20674
Your biggest problem is your self image. You need to learn that you have plenty of great qualities and boost your self esteem instead of reducing yourself to your own negative perception of your appearance. The guys you really want to know could care less that you are a little overweight. It's what's inside that counts. Smile ;0)
306814
Truthfully speaking, I believe most men are attracted to women with curves, but they are afraid to admit it, as if it were illegal to do so. You see society predicates what is beautiful, and honey we aint it!, and that's a shame, because the average woman is a size 14.\n\nSociety needs to reconfigure its idea of beauty, and realize that "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES" not every man wants a twiggy. Society views a woman with curves to be overweight, and she may not be, there is nothing wrong with being healthy and having some junk in your trunk too. Most men dont want a bone, most men want meat on their bones, you know what I mean!\n\nI wish that us thick girls could get some love too, just like our thinner counterparts. I guess guys are afraid of what others will think, as a matter of fact I have a male friend that is attracted to thick women, and all his friends tell him he's a chubby chaser, now that is just not fair, but he doesnt care, he tells them they dont know what their missing, but you can see where I'm going with this, his friends are the equivilent of how society views us thick girls, and that is just so sad, because we are the majority not the minority!\n\nHowever I am feeling confident that slowly but surely societies ideals of us is changing, thanks to people like Mo'Nique and Toccara, they are starting to break down some barriers.\n\nI hope my answer, as long as it is, was helpful to you. Keep your head up sistah, we gonna get in there....\n\nI hope I was able to help you out!!!
26694
I AGREE!! Listen don't pay attention to those type of guys...They are brainwashed into thinking the ideal woman is 36-24-36 (or whatever that darn measurement is). Make sure YOU are comfortable with who YOU are; and be confident in yourself, 'cause I'm sure you have a lot to offer some lucky guy. As for me, I love my big girls. The world wouldn't be complete without them. Keep your head up, and screw 'em all. Believe me when I tell you that someone's out there looking for you at this minute!!\n\nOne Love,\n             d_marco46
295907
I am sure you are very pretty. This guy may genuinely like you. That is quite possible. Perhaps it is not only your looks but your inner beauty is also beckoning to him. I have seen women that I thought didn't look that great and as I got to know them they were transformed. Their inner beauty shined through. \n\nAlso honey don't let you low opinion of yourself sabotage your life.
154168
Personally I like a woman that is thicker. However some women are just to overweight. The problem is not men its the way that the magizines and TV have programmed everyone into thinking that an attractive woman has to have a figure like a pencil which I find revolting. There are men out there for everyone you just have to find him. Set your standards and never settle and you will have a great guy.
74280
You have discovered one very wonderful way of finding a man who is right for you! Sure, you can meet guys who may be attracted to various things about you, but if he doesn't respect your choice (which IS a Right Choice, btw), then he obviously is NOT THE GUY FOR YOU!\n\nThink of it this way. There are 6 billion people on this planet. ONE is meant for you....\nSo you will definitely have to sift through and be picky.\n\nDon't give in! Find friends who help you stay strong! PRAY! You have resources that will help you. Trust in The Lord!\n\nBUT WAIT... WHY IS IT THAT ONE OF YOUR ANSWERS DEALS WITH THE SIZE OF MEN'S PENISES? BE CAREFUL... you may be PLAYING WITH FIRE.
11141
I'm a guy, and when I usually see a beautiful woman, my first instinct is to assume she's taken. (This is the exact same thing supermodels and actresses go through.) Tone your fire down just a bit, and guys won't be intimidated of you. I know! I've been a guy all my life! :-)
527269
I have asked myself the same thing!! So i asked my guy why is this, i said is it because you have a beautiful confident woman at home and what you need is someone not so pretty who looks at you and says wow! I cant beleive I am lucky enough to have this hot guy, you know..like they need to feel worshiped so to say..and he also stated that he knew they wanted him and it was easy to get
666955
Having a job and a car SHOULD be expected but you would be surprised how many single men have neither. I don't consider myself shallow but that really is a requirement I expect from men I date. It doesn't have to be a Benz and you don't have to be sporting a big bankroll but I need to know up front you are not going to expect me to support you and haul your nappy a s s everywhere you need to go. I would never expect someone to do that for me. I have a job and a car and a place of my own. After that personality is the most important thing I look for but most women are stuck on looks after that. Looks aren't everything. Sure there should be a physical attraction but for me that comes more from a good personality and sense of humor than physical attributes. The ugliest guy on they outside becomes gorgeous in my eyes if he can make me feel good and keep me smiling and happy.
332933
A lot of guys (like myself) like smaller breasts on a well proportioned body. Don't get me wrong, I like big breasts also, but I really do think that smaller breasts on a smokin' body are actually more attractive !!! O.K., so that puts a little bit more pressure on you to keep the rest of your body in great shape ......... but it sounds like you are already doing that. For me anyway, I have found that as I have gotten older, I care a lot more about a women's legs, butt, and the rest of her body. So it sounds like you have a leg up in that department. Most guys will stare at big boobs, but that doesn't mean they don't find women with smaller ones attractive also. And, as you get older, you find that a connection with the person is more important than how they look - of course, you do have to be attracted to them - but none of us are perfect !!!!! And, your boobs are your boobs - if a guy is too shallow to like you because of them, it's probably better to go ahead and find out and then let him go and then you find someone else. And lastly, never consider implants .............. they look and feel fake and most guys really don't like them. Just keep your legs, butt, and body in great shape and learn to accept that you already have gorgeous boobs !!!!! I am at mikeallen555555 at yahoo dot com if you want to chat.
122824
Every person has his or her own idea of beauty. I have a good friend who is attracted to very large women. Personally, I am very attracted to bookish, quiet, intelligent women who many guys may not look at twice. Yes, many guys chase after the Barbie dolls.... but not all guys do. More important than your looks is your attitude about yourself, and your openess to being accepted by a good man who sees the beauty on your inside and out. I bet one day it happens for you!
200953
Lots of men like women with some padding.  Compromise...don't gain and only lose enough to be in the healthy range...not to have an anorexic appearance.  Be happy that he isn't that type of man to leave you because you aren't the slender thing he married...men have been known to do that.  Count your blessings!
5108
I think a clue could be with your username. It kind of indicates that you like the "bad boy" type. The majority of those are not going to treat you well. Guys like myself are good guys who the bad boys don't have the guts to mess with. You need to find one of those...We always treat our women extremely well and you have all the fun with none of the drama...Lol.  ;)
317453
The good, canned answer is that someone should love you for what's on the inside, not on the outside.  \n\nThe reality is that some people are not turned on by people who are heavier.  Physical attraction will always be an important part of a good relationship.  On the other hand, some guys really like women with more curves--  \n\nYou need to ask yourself what type of guy are you really looking for?  If it is really meant to be, your weight should not play too much a factor.\n\nI used to be REALLY overweight, and found that I would get to know lots of guys, but they would instantly put me into the 'buddy' category, because of my physical appearance.  They just didn't have any interest in me physically.  I lost quite a bit of weight, and had an easier time as men would be attracted first, then get to know me.  \n\nAs long as you are happy with yourself, and confident that you look good and have a great personality, then you should find the perfect guy for you.   You sound like a pretty insightful, intelligent person... some guy is bound to notice that soon!
599296
The national average for women is a size 13. At your age it's hard to meet a guy thats interested n anything  thats less than a twig. How do you feel about your size? Are you comfortable in your own skin. Older men like curves, and you have them. Your not that big......your just curvey. Have confidence in your self that attracts men.   Find a hobby that preoccupies your time where you dont feel down and one that you can also get exercize Trst me it makes you feel better. Good luck Sweety1
162164
A woman is sexy because she chooses to be, not because she is a specific size.  The media says we have to be bone thin to be beautiful and until we stand up and say 'no, thank you, I'm not buying into that crap', the idiots of society (like piversonex, Scotty & hairyhairychinchin) will feel free to continue their name calling.\n\nEver notice that even fat men want skinny women?