well i stalked a man i admit. 2 months ago i left that country. since then i havent gone a night where i havent dreamed of him. should i be concerned?\n\nand my otehr question is, they say obsessive personalities never lose interest... do you think i'll eventually stop thinking like a stalker and feel like stalking people?
136694
You need help from a psychologist.  It sounds like you ran away from the situation.  If that's the case then you are avoiding the problem.  Since you now know that avoidance doesn't work I think that you should seek professional help.\n\nThere are many psychological therapies that are helpful in dealing with obsessive thoughts, primarily Cognitive Behavioural Therapy.  It may not be possible to remove the obsessions completely it is true, but you can learn cogntive and behavioural coping strategies to minimise the distress they are evidently causing you.\n\nHope that helps, good luck.
315180
i'm sorry, i have to ask, how do you LOOK at someone in a stalking way? Just tell her she's bothering you! If she keeps on ignore her, i mean like she doesn't exsist, after a while she'll get tired of you...
393247
yikes honey, these guys sound like obsessive stalkers. what they are doing is wrong and it is illegal.  i'd suggest filing a report with the police..  get them arrested for tresspassing if they are on your property without permission.\n\nyour college should have some sort of guidance department that can help you cope with these issues.\n\nas far as why people do this? because they are insane. these people don't cope well with rejection, and instead of moving on in their life, they make it their obsession.. these people need serious mental help.\n\nas far as why or how you always seem to attract these type of guys? i have no idea..
476672
Stalker Possibly? hehehe\n\nPeace
463888
You can stop when you stop checking up on him. As long as you dig around to see if he is okay or listen to stories about him, you are feeding your fantasy/dreams/neurosis.\nStop all check/sightings/following. Then when you start to think of him, repeat the mantra "I distinctly remember forgetting about him." This will help reprogram your mind.
652000
Depends on what you plan to do when you see your "very old friend/worst enemy." If you're out to make amends with him/her, that's one thing, but if you're out for revenge, I'd classify it as obsession.
580968
SNAP!!!!!!\n\ndid the same thing with a guy i met on her too. stayed up all hours just chatting about stuff and listing old songs! \n\nok, here's what i think. when you meet someone you just 'click' with, it is easy to get carried away with yourself and be consumed with it all. thats not to say that there is not anything serious there. all i am saying is reality is often different to fantasy.\n\nme and the guy i'm still chatting too met a couple of weeks ago. he is a great guy but i think we both felt that reality was a little different. we still chat and i am due to see him again shortly.\n\nwhat we decided was to take things slowly, get to know eachother better as friends as see what develops from that. it's the most sensible option i think.
427467
Ummm....how old are you for one??? Another thing is are you doing things you wouldn't normally do like making sure you are somewhere you know he will be before he gets there and then making sure he sees you.  If you're blatantly being annoying and he is avoiding you then it's stalker/obsession and believe me I speak from experience I was that way about the same girl for 3 years but she was leading me on and playing with my mind even though she wasn't really interested in me.  If you can look ahead and see yourself possibly getting married or having children with or even living with this guy then it's probably love, even if it's misguided and he doesn't love you it's still love.  I've heard it more and more lately and I tend to agree with this "somtimes love just isn't enough" because love is the igniter but hard work, determination, and a level head is the key to making love work.  But that's just my opinion. Hope that answered your question.
285794
I don't think you can ever forget him, unfortunately for you and the rest of us who may suffer from similar problems with our past.  You obviously need to resist him.  You can try to avoid putting yourself in positions where you will run into him.  You know enough about him to know what many of his habits are and where he often will frequent.  It will not stop chance meetings as there is nothing to do about them, but it should limit many of the more risky run ins you may have.  Otherwise, the best hope is that you immerse yourself in some hobby, activity or volunteer somewhere...anything to occupy your mind.  Otherwise, I am at a loss as to what you can do, other than moving away.  Just stay strong and hold to your convictions.  Remember why you are not with him and drill the negative thoughts into your mind, remember the bad times, the bad things and hopefully your desire for him will fade.  Good luck!
341503
obsession is not a good thing but my fiance is 5 years older than me. i met him when i was in high school. everyone doubted us for the longest time and we proved them wrong. age is just a number.
65712
Your "possessive" ways pushed him away, and you "constantly calling" him when he says he doesn't want you to actually comes close to STALKING,..and stalking is aganist the law.\n  \nYou say you will change for him, but changing for someone \ndoesn't work, and he seems smart enough to know that.   \n\nIf he should call you talk to him, but I doubt that he will, so I wouldn't sit by the phone waiting for a call that's not going to come.\n\nGet on with your life.  There are plenty of "fish in the sea". But first you need to seriously work on overcoming your "possessive" ways, which comes from being "insecure".  Learn to "LOVE YOURSELF", because you have to love "you" before you can love someone else.
554772
If I thought a guy were a stalker I wouldnt tell him that he makes me feel incredible inside, trust me, I would be making that incredible sprint to run as far away as possible, or else ignore the guy completely. \nIt looks like she likes you, so just give it a go :) \nGood luck! ^_^
124237
Wow! It would make a great movie if you did find him. I'm wondering (by looking at your user name) if you are really ready for a new relationship yet. aybe it would be better if you kept him in your heart as "the one who got away." Just make sure not to measure every man you meet against your fantasy.
556361
You have said it in the first line of your question here, that this problem seems to be based on your past. You seemed to have been wounded by something that has already happened before. Its best you sit and think. Go back to that part of your past and mentally think as to what you could have done to make things better. I know doing so will be painful but it is something that you must do in order to ease the pain. Continuous suspicions, mistrust issues are not to be looped over such a long period of time, especially when you have beautiful people around you who I am positive are caring and concerned more than you know. There is absolutely nothing to be afraid of and most of all there's nothing more frightening than fear itself. Another question here from my side is why is it that you are afraid to love? I am asking this because we all know that what you give is definitely what you get back in return. If you provide love and affection, it is guaranteed that it will come back to you too. If you have any further questions or need someone to talk to, please don't hesitate to e-mail me. Remember, there are so many wonderful people around and you should give them a chance before you can think of anything else. Before that, please try and do what I've mentioned earlier about looking back and thinking for a moment. Until then, take care. :)
583987
Hihihi... you have paranoia now, right?\nWatch out cause THEY will create your psychological profile from your questions and anwers and chase you down... get you buy up all their stuff!\n\n:-))\n\nHehe, nice theory, anyway! Congrats.\nYou actually have a point, man... I will watch over my answers and questions from now on! Oh-oh-oh!
109517
Once Pitagora (if I correctly recall), said: "either way, you will regret it". I think that either way you will be happy, too. Given the distance, normally the guy is obliged to come meet you. For a girl to "expose" herself in such a manner... I guess he has some fantasies about you left in some corners of his brains... It is you who decides what step should take next, but if he mentioned that is still attracted by you, it's just normal for him to come show you this (not yet consumed) affection for you. I know that the fog persists in your mind... try to do whatever your heart tells you :)
444512
Sounds like a stalker setting you up.  I would keep watching out the window.\n\nCoach