I can't leave I don't want her to be hurt by me . I made a promis but its realy over .
131267
start a new relationship on the DL
103312
damn this sucks pretty bad . well as you said you never made her any  promises so yes you should move along .since this is going to be painful for her regardless just be really honest with her and tell her why your leaving ...exactly why ...women have a tendency to try and pick things apart too much ...if shes in some sort of denial shes gonna have a hard time understanding why your leaving her  , as long as your really clear she wont have to judge herself too  hard and wonder what she did wrong . and by all means dont let hurting her stand in the way of you being happy ...but no i dont think you necessarily think you shouldve left earlier sometimes we like to hang on too long thinking that magically things are going to falll in place but it rarely happens that way damn im blabbing hahah sorry
243571
You can't not hurt her feelings because you are telling her you don't want to be with her anymore.  But I recommend not going into a lot of detail about why you don't want to be with her.  Give her a few compliments so she feels good about herself but not so many that she has hope of getting back together.  Remember to use a lot of "I feel that..." not "You are such a...".  Good luck!
99970
yes I wished I could do that but unfortuntly you cann't do that.  We have to learn how to let those feelings go and move on with our lives!!!!  I had a friend that tore my heart out of my chest at that's not the 1st time lol...  But this friend just really did a # on me.  I mean just about a year ago we stopped talking and I didn't understand why?  Then the truth finally came out she just used me for things like drugs,MY car,a place to stay at were she could stay away from home and I also think that she used me as a bodygard so if someone was going to beat her up then you would have to go meet me(im not a small girl like she was) but anyways you get my point of the matter.  So I have got away from drugs my car don't have her a$$ in it lol lol lol....I have seen that things come back to them and they well have someone else to do it to them too so don't worry they will get whats coming to them sooner or later...also don't let them brack you as a person be strong for yourself...I hope this info helps you out some...also I have heard that you will only have 2 or 3 REAL friends in your life thats not alot so be very choosey with friends.
642979
im in the same way bro so i know how u feel id lay the cards on the table and lay everything out on how u feel and wat u want if she dont feel the same way bro then i guess it mite b time to move on !!!!!!!! good luck tho bro
46259
try giving her some more room, let her go out with just the girls one night this weekend, see if it hurts you too bad. also, listen to what she has to say. next time you go out, let her choose where you go. (don't try everything all at once, letting go of the control will take steps.) also, remember she has the final say on her body... idk if this has anything to do with your question, but just so you know...\n\ngood luck
118439
sounds to me like you're looking for an excuse to wander. if you have to ask why love and loyalty have to come together then i seriously question whether you have ever really felt true love. \nif you feel like you have to "force" yourself to be committed to anyone then you really aren't ready for that committment. that's not wrong. its ok to not be ready. just let her know that although you have strong feelings for her you are still not ready to settle down. just let the girl know that you don't plan on being physically faithful. that is a matter of health as well as heart. if she chooses to stick by you while you make a more firm decision, hurray for you. you found someone who really cares about being with you. \nyou can't be blamed for wanting to explore more of what the world has to offer. i encourage every male AND FEMALE to explore heavily before making a decision to be with that one person. just please let everyone involved that someone else is involved. \nand WEAR A CONDOM.
529447
been there done that. I no excactly how you feel, I had the same thing happen to me with this dude. we kissed and every thing. its a weird situation. since she doesn't talk that much then ask her if you're offically going out. then latter tell her that you don't want her to call you so often. stick with her, once shes gone you'll feel realy bad like I did when I let him go. enjoy every phyisical action she does, it gets better and better. I used to not think about the dude that was with me and we went for a long time. you'll realy miss her if you leave her. I did.
238910
Girlfriend, your like me caught up in the rapture of uncertainty. We want to leave but afraid deep down inside to make that move. Our insecurities allow us to not be more clear in our train of thoughts and we make sudden decisions without thinking them through. You are scared to let go but at some point you have to realize it is what it is, he is a cheater and he's possessive and somewhat controlling. You left and that was the first  step, now move on.\nMEN ARE LIKE A BUS ONE COMES EVERY 5 MINUTES YOU CAN RIDE THE BUS TO THE END OR DO AS YOU HAVE DONE GET OFF AND CATCH THE NEXT ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
85777
Oh, it is frustrating. I am so sorry. :( Well, if she feels that way about you and you are having a difficult time convincing her that you are not a player, as hard as it is, perhaps it is time to think about moving on. If she does not trust you now, why do you want to try to get involved with her \nHOw long have you known her? Have you told her how you feel about her? If you have and she still doesn't trust you, well....you just may have to end up biting the bullet and explaining to her that since she cannot trust you then it is time for you to move on. \n\nSorry to hear that. \nBELIEVE ME YOU DON'T WANT TO GET INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE THAT DOES NOT TRUST YOU. \n\nI had a boyfriend that was like that and he would follow me around everywhere and he was always questioning me as to who i was talking to and how I knew such and such a guy. \n\nOh Yeah, I forgot about that little remark that you made. Ummmmmmm..cool it, :D that may be part of the reason why she thinks you are a player. \n\nGood luck to you.
436547
Girls know what they want and she thinks she is being kind by giving you excuses.  Before you get hurt any further get yourself away from her.  Don't even talk with her.  There are plenty of other girls out there that will want what you have to offer.  If this girl has to make up excuses - it is over!  I have been down that road many times.  It's hard to tell someone that you have had relations with that it is over.  Most caring people don't like to hurt others so see it for what it is - over.  I am so sorry for your situation but unfortunately the truth hurts.  I also have been on your side of the situation.  You are looking for any gleam of hope for this relationship to work but unfortunately its only one sided.  It hurts.  The sooner you walk away the better off you will be.  Ten months, while it is a long time, it would be worse if longer.   The "perfect guy for her" is more than likely her way of saying she honors your friendship.  When women are in relationships and opt to get out they want their cake and eat it too.  It's ok for her to move on but she doesn't want anybody else to have you.  Hope this helps and good luck to you.
140730
im in the same situation.. because of my past.. im afraid to get too attatched just to get hurt AGAIN... but honestly.. .if you like this girl alot.. and you're willing to wait to see where it may go, go for it! BUT LIKE SHE SAID.. if what you truly want is to walk away.. do what you gotta do... everyone goes through hard times.. but in the end.. she is probably more concerned with you being happy than anything else!
252079
Maybe you should just stay out of the middle of it. Give her support, but just tell her that you rather just not get involoved, unless he did something serious to her.
144621
be gone with her. u r a safety net for her cuz u will always be there and she knows it. she is not ready to committ yet, but doesn't want to be alone. think about it. Does she every leave u without havin another guy there to take ur spot. she doesn't want to be alone, but she wants to play the feild. either get out or make it an open relationship.
201255
tell her you dont want to be involved. if she still insists on pulling you into it, then tell her that you are going to be honest and tell her exactly how u feel on the issue that is at hand
428680
Well, I've had that problem before and its not fun. Just take a chance at the relationship but don't promise anything, you never know where life will take you. Tell her you cant promise her anything, but just taken a chance. It could be the best thing you ever do.
129123
It is not your choice to make, and right now is not the time to try to keep her from going back to her first girlfriend.  She will decide without any pressure from you.  You can only alienate her by pressing the matter.\n\nKick back, and let her have the time she needs to make the inevitable decision.  \n\nThis matter will resolve itself if you just leave it alone to do it.