My situation makes it hard for me to trust and commit/what are some of the tools of healing have you used? I also was poisoned the night it happened to me, by a couple.
127631
Do you need help now? 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) \n\nInternational emergency links and crisis hotlines \n\nAre you in crisis right now?\nYou can call the National Sexual Assault Hotline, operated by RAINN, 24 hours a day at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673). You can also search for your local rape crisis center. If you are in danger now please call 911.\n\nBasic hotlines\n\nRape Crisis 1.800.656.HOPE (4673)\n\nSelf Injury 1.800.DON'T.CUT (366.8288)\n\nSuicide Hotline 1.800.SUICIDE (784.2433)\n\nDomestic Violence 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)\n\nGay & Lesbian 1.888.THE.GLNH (843.4564)\n\nChild Abuse 1.800.4.A.CHILD (422.4453)\n\nOr call 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) and be directed automatically to a local crisis center hotline. Feel free to ask to speak to a woman.\n\nHope These Resources Are Helpful. \nHang In There Girl, You Are \nStronger Than You Think!
26228
its hard im going thought the same thing right now but its my best friend who commited sucide you just have to think about the good time you had dont think about the death you can talk to someone you can even talk to me if you want to i can try to help as much as i can but you cant keep it bottled up iside you it makes it worse so if you want to email or something my email is   lisa6948146@yahoo.com   also i have yahoo messinger too if u wanna add me
432166
I am a counsellor. The tough part is getting in door. If you're harming yourself, then realizing that something is wrong, and not letting it defeat you is important. Now is the time to protect your future. So good job beginning the process of taking out the garbage that's been piling up. Give whoever you chose a few times to earn your trust. You feeling safe is the critical issue. Ask about confidentiality limits. The best part about seeing a counsellor is they have a way of seeing over your obsticles and safely guiding you. Think of it as a big log across your path. You just need some help clearing the way so you can get on with the path your life was meant to take. If you have choice and it's not someone chosen for you by social services, then meet a couple and decide. My experience is that a cognitive behavioural therapist may be most benefical. Look for someone with experience dealing with youth. Good luck.
318706
Every situation is different and ever changing. You just have to do what feels right and try to let yourself recover from your loss. Surround yourself with people you can trust, the rest will follow.
3755
I can certainly relate to what you are going through.  I, too, am a giver, and I have felt so drained of everything after being repeatedly used by someone. Yes, it does hurt badly to be liked for only what you have or can give!  I agree that you should be quick to forgive, and not just when it feels right.  However, you can forgive someone but still keep a healthy distance from that person if they continue doing things to hurt you.  Someone who is TRULY sorry won't keep using and abusing you.  I would suggest you try reading the book "Safe People" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. It really deals with this very issue and shows you how to safely choose people who are not going to treat you as a door mat.  In the mean time, go on forgiving, but set up some boundaries for yourself and don't allow people to walk on you.  Choose your friends wisely.  You can still love them, and pray for them, that they will come to see how they have treated you, but you don't want to give them the go-ahead for mistreating you.  If they are truly your friends, they will stop and never do it again.  If not, it's time to meet some new people.
164066
lalapetal, I would sugest that you talk to someone about this. Is there somekind of counselor you can seek? Some kind of suport groups in your area? I once told that I need to let it go and give it to god. But sometimes it stays with us and find it hard to accept things and forgive others. If you dont want to seek help then please seek a forum that can suport you.. google for some abuse forum, there are some good ones out there. You need to def talk to someone about this so you can begin to heal... this is the first step...
48162
I am sorry to hear that. The same thing happened to me a long with physical and mental abuse. \n\nI sought counseling and I am well again. Not everyone is bad and not eveyrone will treat you like crap. \n\nHave you explained the situation to your partner?\nthat helps as well , believe me.
334721
honestly, only time can heal wounds! nothing else does! time will say whats going to happen next! remain optimistic and have faith in god and in yourself! gradualy you will know what to do yourself! as for now take help from friends and family! and if there is no one look for some on the net! cyber chatting really helps! there is a strange sense of calmness you feel after you talk to a complete stranger who is not biased about the situation! hope you find peace!
436073
Wow, you sound a lot like me.\n\nI have problems trusting people too.  But sometimes... I can't stay quiet and I start trusting people.  But then I get afraid and I runaway from them.\n\nYou need to find a friend you could trust and try your best to not runaway from (if you are anything like me).  \n\nEmail me if you want and I could try to help.  It seems we have a lot in common.
350300
hi their first of all I'm sorry .\ni have also suffered from the ILLNESS panic for 11 years the day they started to ease was the day i excepted i will probably always be prone to them, my life is probably 90% over them and when i do get the start of one now i try to let it happen , some one once told me to tell someone anyone when you start to have one i tryed this and bugger me it does work its like as if you beat them by letting someone else know , when you except them it cant beat you the same and mine have eased off , i try now to laugh more and not let them rule my life , if one day it beats me and  i have a bad day then i say to my self tomorrow will be better , \ni can truly say the day i had the first one was the worst day off my life but if i keep letting them beat me my life will always beat crap .\nplease find the power to except and they ease \nmy thoughts are with you
153619
trust maybe lost if someone you know quite well has let you down, or if something you werent happy about that happened to you, there are different levels of trust, depends which you lack, if perhaps your boyfriend two timed you, you would find it hard to trust again, if you were assaulted or similar, it would be hard to trust again after that.\n\nor perhaps someone has lied to you, that can also shatter trust, if you have some idea of which trust you lack perhaps someone can give you a more in depth answer.\n\nif something has happened to you, in which you dont trust many people, accept what has happened to you, and try and realise not everyone has or will act that way towards you again, if its boyfriend or friend issues or parent issues, they have to earn trust, best way is to tackle it, identify your specific need. perhaps you are just insecure and you feel everyone is lying to you.
324843
no...you have to trust again at some point.  just be careful at first, and give yourself plenty of time to heal from the wounds others have given you.  you can't go through life not trusting anyone.  just be careful about who you trust, and don't do it right away.  make them earn your trust.
355549
Well, I can sympathize... because I have been "walked over" by many friends.  I'm smart, academically speaking, and have made many friends who feel it is my duty to tutor and provide them the answers and help on all their papers.  Or friends who only call when they need something.  This is why I only have 1 real friend, and my husband.  It took a while to realize that people are shadey, and you can't always trust them.  Hard lesson learned.  Now I evaluate every relationship, asking "Am I getting out of this relationship what I am putting in?" and if I am putting in too much energy... and not recieving any of that energy back, then you really have to evaluate if it's worth it..
229215
Sounds like you have some trust issues in general. Maybe you were betrayed by someone you trusted and now you're on guard. It takes time to build trust and to allow yourself to be vulnerable. Once you do, you'll be able to tell that person anything.
420979
My friend thank you for having enough courage to ask this question.  There are answers.  We have had many just like you in Shattered Men ask this and they have found healing.  \n\nYou can start over again and become a new person.  PLEASE contact me
72168
I have the same problem, ive been hurt by friends and family and i STILL think up conspiracy theories. Talking with him will help some, but the change has to be WITHIN you, the only thing he can do is make his life a little more open for you. I try to be as open and honest with my GF as possible, that way she can trust me more, also i tell her where ive been and she even knows my E mail password. She knows who is on my buddy list and who ive called. I do all of this so that there WONT be trust issues in our relationship. BUT she could still be paranoid, so she has to just admit to herself, that if im cheating on her, then it DOESENT MATTER, she will just break up with me and move on, or if i truly repent then fix the problem and continue the relationship. But you HAVE to let it go, go out on a limb and put yourself out there. once you say it doesent matter, and you have "let that person go" then that takes away any walls that were in your relationship before.
174171
I was saddened to see that an a$$hole showed up before I could answer you, but maybe it is a blessing in disguise. There will always be those out there who are willing and even anxious to see you stumble, and the sooner you develop coping skills for dealing with them, too the better off you'll be. But I want to congratulate you on your choice for recovery, and I wish for you every good thing life has to offer. One day at a time. Be well.