in my social environment i had,  i found person that i can not stand with but the conditions always force me to keep dealing with her no matter what. the more i tried to understand and get along with her the more i found reason why i can not stand her \n\nif i want to keep the distance with her it doesnt seem polite because we have the same friends and activities. i know that as a mature person i should be more undertand about other people character but i realy can not accept this person behaviour\n\ni begin to wonder, maybe it is me who have a problem in here but almost all my friends agree with me about one's bad behaviour eventhough  they still think that it is just a simple matter..
132133
Avoid when possible.\n\nWhen you can't avoid, just use basic manners and be polite. It's not like you have to live with the person and share a bedroom. If you're basically polite you can tolerate anyone for an hour or two.\n\nKeep it in perspective. No one will die if you have to associate with an idiot for a short time.
308782
Yes, I do. I have a sister in law that is like that. She can be a very nice person, but she cannot stand it if she cannot have her way . People like that bring out the stubborn nature of me. I know what they are doing and I will not budge. She hates when I do it, it really makes her mad, but she learned to have respect for me.
300943
It sounds like you need to find new friends. It is a sad fact that as you get older people change. You are smart enough to see that what she is doing is not right and that is a great start. Ignore what she says and be the bigger person and act like it does not bother you. Stop trying to be her friend as there are plenty of other great people out there that would love to be your friend! If she asks why you two are not friends anymore, just tell her that you don't need to be around people like her. Don't sweat it kiddo! You will make some great friends! Good luck!
239481
First rule of thumb. Don't let people walk all over you or make you 2nd guess yourself. If you know that you did nothing wrong than I wouldnt let it bother you and maybe start looking for a new friend because it doesnt sound like she is much of a friend. If my real friends had a problem with me they would tell me what was going on and how they felt. And you have every reason to treat her as she treats you.
319572
The only thing it depends on with me is if you are trying to come between me and my family in a harmful way..\n\nOtherwise.. I forgive easily .. unfortunately I am a softy and try to understand where everyone else is in their lives, I give them many more outs than the normal person would.. so if they have even half the friendship as I have with them, they'll find it easy to come and say.. "Ya know what?.. I over-reacted.. sorry.. wanna go get a beer?" and know that even though they were having a bad day.. week life..I wouldn't judge them as harshly as they did me when my feelings were hurt. \n\nAll people have faults.. friends have limits and breaking points, so do you.. if you're feelings were hurt, why were they hurt.. because this person acted so fouly, or did you take it too personal or hold this person in a higher regard than they should have been? \n\nTake the high road.. feels good every time.. even if you almost bite off you tongue sometimes..take the high road.
73749
Maybe I'm cold but I say either ignore him or  be quick and polite. You aren't together for a reason so why force any sort of relationship or acquaintanceship on it at all.\n\nI've had many people who treated me like rubish come up years later and want to be all nice and friendly, looking for a bit of closure to ease their soul. I don't harbor a grudge, but I don't forget either.
621422
My advice is that you DON'T become one.  Why sink to that level?\n\nWhy not tell you friend what you are seeing in her behavior and talk about it?  If she won't talk about it, she isn't acting like a friend in my opinion.\n\nThe solution to b*tch behavior is NOT to become one yourself.  That solves nothing at all.  It may make you feel good, briefly, but \nit costs you a lot.   In my opinion, it costs way too much.\n\nBest of luck!
225677
I had similar experience too. Initially I had a hard time deciding whether it was due to some fault of mine or that whether I should have been more tolerant. I even felt that maybe I could go and explain to my friend why I had stopped talking with him altogether.\n\nBut then, I felt that it was for the best. Maybe I was wrong in some aspects, but it was wrong on his part too to not have been understanding and to have taken things for granted. A true friend would never put his/her friend in a spot or do/say something which would hurt his/her friend's feelings -atleast not intentionally- and since this was happening quite often, I felt it was not unintentional (and even if it was, then it meant that he was being too insensitive).\n\nRegardless, now I have no bad feelings about it. We should move on... there will always be new friends both for us and for our 'ex-friend'... I just wish now that he too has moved on and I wish him all the success and happiness in life- only that I cant be a part of it. Nothing to feel too bad about it, huh?
187561
i used to be like that.so i know exactly what ur talking about.i decided one day to just snap out of it.and i decided that if they dont like me for who i am then their not the one for me.just be urself and if they dont like that then thats their problem,cause there is no point in acting like someone else.if u can be urself around friends and family.why not them?good luck and hope it works out.
56400
Tell your friend that it looks like she wants to go a different way in her friendships and that you don't have much choice but to watch her go.  Let her know you're there for her if she needs a friend but not to bring any hate or meanness to the table when she does, to leave it with the hater she's wanting to hang with now.  It's tough to watch a pal go off in a direction you think is hurtful, KNOW is hurtful.  Part of growing is discovering what you're really about though and there's something in this new friendship that she's trying to find in herself.  There may also be an emerging masochistic nature to your friend that she's not shared with you before and this new friendship may be REALLY appealing in a way you can't relate to.  My guess is that if you give her space, she'll remember who she is and what she's about and reconnect with you.  If not then you need to understand that there are an awful lot of people out there who don't have the courage of their own convictions and are wildly uncomfortable with who they are.  You sound totally grounded but I get the sense that your friend isn't.
25000
Yes, it's happened more than once in my life and I didn't want to hurt them, even though I didn't like them.  But eventually it's just not worth hanging around so I left.  In the end and looking back it was a stupid thing to do and I would tell anyone saying they didn't like their girlfriend to leave.  Makes me a hypocrite but that's the answer.
522741
If you put what others had said before me, and consider that I is okay to not be sure, but to date and see what happens, and not pull back, then you have it half licked. \nIn my case, I had parents who did not fight and argue, and stayed together, and I think really loved each other, but pretty much did their own thing. \nWhat has put me off from relationships, and what I am just getting over, is all my friends who had parents who divorced. Worse, friends with horrible step parents, the kind the beat with belts and all kinds of crap. I am holding out for the love of a lifetime, and want to raise my own kids, if I have any.\nSo, I see your ideas as really rational and normal given your background. As one person has said, the best way to do it is to not judge the situation or a future mate before even meeting her. \nIt can be done, I am just learning myself. So can you. And, when you meet the right one, you can tell her these things, and she will not be offput, as long as you tell her you really want to get to know her before committment. \nI have been interested in the same person now for a couple years. This time it may work. She hangs in with me, and I with her. No we don't live together, but are slowly learing to trust. \nSo, hang in there, and let things happen slowly. Just because you kiss, or even shag doesn't mean that you are about to be in a trap, as long as you are careful. \nBe good to yourself, and realize that sometimes it is the unknown that makes life exciting!
629890
I would personally address this ex friend of yours and let her know that you are fine with the situation, and her cowering in the other room could make others uncomfortable, not to mention...it does make her look a little childish.  Hopefully that should resolve that particular problem, and if this is the way she acts, then I can see why she is your ex friend.
404692
When dealing with an envious co-worker, I kill them with kindness, and I'm not talking about lip service. You must be genuine when doing this for it to work. Obviously they have massive insecurities, and perceive you as some kind of threat. I would also suggest keeping ones personal, and professional life mum. In essence, do not give anyone a reason to hold you in contempt. The old saying is true, "keep your friends close, your enemies closer".
445760
These feelings that you are having toward her are going to keep building and building; if you don't go ahead and discuss them with her, you might lose your cool one day and really go off on her and say things that maybe you did not mean to and cannot be taken back.  It sounds to me that she is indeed taking you for granted and will continue to do so until you tell her how you feel.  Some people do not realize that they do this to others until it is brought to their attention.  Then again, on the other hand, some people are just like that and down right rude.  If I were you, I would tell her exactly how I felt about everything, but try to do it in a nice way.  From the sound of the narrative you wrote with your question, it seems as you are a good person and would handle this way.  Hopefully, once you confront her, she will see the "error" of her ways and change her attitude.  If she doesn't, at least then you will know that you tried and you will not fell bad when you tell her no the next time she wants something from you.  Good luck.
6530
the best way to deal with a person is to figure out whether or not you actually like them, despite how they think.  are they a good person at heart?\n\na person sometimes cannot help their ignorances.  i grew up in a small, conservative, and nasT racist town.  therefore, after i moved to a nice mixed community, i sometimes come across as insensitive to those who aren't like me.  it's not that i harbor any resentment WHATSOEVER of anyone based on anything save for how they treat me!  it's just that i never learned when i was a child of the things that are appropriate to discuss.  if the person in question is open to new ideas, then you should remain around them, and not look down upon them.  help them see other points of view, if it's within your capacity.. and if not, direct them to those who can.  \n\nlooking down on a person just because you THINK they're of lower consciousness than you is borderline prejuduice.
3478
Yes, a woman with whom I was a really good friend (I will call her Jane) just turned on me and almost refuses to talk to me now. We don't live near each other anymore, so it's not as big a deal now as it once was. But I have no idea what I did or said to turn her against me. I am one who has really good relationships with people and long-term friendships. So this really took me by surprise.\n\nJane and I used to spend hours together every week and a lot of time on the phone. We were both members of the same professional association. I saw her there and she was really rude to me like I had offended her in a big way. \n\nI am still mystified by this situation and it took place nearly eight years ago. I was told, by a mutual friend who asked me about the break up that Jane had done this in other relationships. That made me feel a little less confused, but I am still saddened by the loss of what I considered a great friendship.