The person I love and I are having to leave each other within the next few months, he is moving to florida for college. Both of us are really depressed about the parting, but trying to deal with it optimistically. does anyone have any suggesstions on how to make it easier to cope with?
132653
Honestly? Break up. A long distance relationship won't work, especially with you both in colleges in different states. You will both meet other people, and one thing will lead to another, and one or another of you, or both of you, will wind up cheating, or suspecting and accusing the other of cheating.\n\nIf, after college, you get back together, great.
12978
I am currently going through the same type of situation. Basically you have to ask is the stress worth it. If it is meant to be then it will happen. Don't force it. If not, there are more fish in the sea.
98195
I have been there...not exactly in the same circumstances but at 19 My relationship finished and i know the pain you are going through, i really do..it hurts so so much and you feel that there is nothing left for you...i am now ten years older and since my split up with that boyfriend, when i was 19, i have done so much with my life..much more than i would ever have done if i had stayed with him...i have more friends now...have had lots more boyfriend...have had an excellent time... going on girly holidays...travelling...meeting new people...i sometimes wish i could go back in time and tell my 19 year old self how wonderful my life was going to be...I can't do that but i can guarentee that your life will get better and better... you will get to know yourself better, you'll do different things, you'll get excited when you have a crush on some one new...believe me, it will happen i never thought it would when we first split up but i then went on to fancying someone different nearly every month...it was great fun. I am all settled down living with a boyfriend now, all grown up..but i look back on that time and smile..it was great...it will be hard for you but look to the future...don't let him string you along... get yourself dressed and go out with some friends...be with people you like. Life is great, you can make it great with out him. Hope this helps xxx
233646
Just move out, did you consider doing so.  What you're about to do might seem nice and hot now, but will you be able to deal with this in the future??? Can you just think of how terrible the consequences might be?  Start thinking of it backwards, if you will be able to deal with this and the possible consequences of this than go right ahead, if not, I suggest you take a real action like moving out, we're all weak and if this is how you feel now than there is a big chance that you both might weaken again one day.
417872
me and my guy was online and i read him you question..this is da answer he gave me ....\n\n"We almost are in the same situation as you..I'm gonna go to another country for 4 years for my higher studies and she will only see me few times a year.. the thing is this is not as difficult as it seems.. dear sis you are not the first one to go through this.. there are loads of people who came through this or if not you have us... even we were pretty much worried in the first place as what to do... but let me give an advice to you... don't let go... just hold on...we are going to have a harder time than you even... cos it's a way longer period and we are both in seperate other countries which is not our mothercountry... so sister the distance doesn't matter...the only thing you have to do is to have a long distance dedication..... the key thing is to keep in touch as much as ppossible... not seeing your guy is tough... i know... but with time you may be able to adapt to that... just keep him in your heart..i'm just saying.. "so close no matter how far, couldn't be much more from the heart, forever trusting who we are , and nothing else matters.." goodluck sister... this will be posted by my girl who's in a country so far away while i'm writing this...\n\nhy im his gal hear ..darling  im teling u pls go ahead i dont regreat..taking the chance caz my guy is da best no matter how far he is his jus near my heart..and his all mine ..dont b scard i ws scrad my self....belive me ...i didnt know wht to do but jus go aead ..its better dan nt knwing wht u 2 wil end up with.
359936
No, this won't work!\nIf he wants to separate now until graduation, he will have other excuses later. Maybe he really believes that all your problems are due to his stress situation at med. school. But it is an illusion to think that this will be over after his graduation. Everybody's life is full of stressy situations, and he will have other ones later!\n\nOr he learns how to deal with stress management now, or he will never do it.\n\nBut maybe your problems are of a very different kind, and this 'stress' is only an excuse because he is to coward or simply to lazy to deal with your real problems in your relationship.\n\nMy advice to you is that you put all your energy finding out the roots of your problems. Even if you don't see any result in this later, never accept this deal of temporary separation, because it will senselessly ruin your own life!\n\nGood luck and be strong!
330763
I've had the same thing happen to me and it sucks. My two best friends ever had to leave but that didn't stop our friendship. I e-mail them almost everyday and I talk to them on the phone. I haven't seen them in a long time but that never stopped our friendship. My friends moved different countries. You're lucky at least your friend is in the same country and if you want to visit you should make a plan. Things will be different but something that NEVER changes is friendship. Trust me it'll be ok.
667120
Girlfriend you will experience all of the above! :-)  As far as the boyfriend situation keep communication open and tell him that you would love to try to make it work.  But, have a mutual agreement that if things are not working out so well long distance that you can walk away from the relationship as friends.  As far as the classes, most of them are pre-req courses, you will be fine! It's an atmosphere that takes time to get used to, but once you do you will LOVE IT! Eating habits, college brings out the bad eater in all of us, it will be so easy to grab something quick, which usually results in something unhealthy, just keep yourself active.  Homesickness, yes at first, but it gets easier with time  :-)  Dorm issues, I had a couple, but my dormmated and I got each other through alot! And Im sure yours will too!  Good luck to you, and stay positive!  \n\nMatt
20078
I was a bit in the same situation. My parents got divorced, and my mom (she got the house), told me we were moving. My best friend lived next to me, and I was freaked. I made sure I stayed in touch though. I didn't move too far, anyway. But, if you start beign friends with him, then you can stay in touch, and you might get him to like you.
304236
Aww honey don't be sad. I just broke up with my fiance last Tuesday and we lived together I know how much this hurts. However you have to remember that what is meant to be will be. If you and him are meant to be together nothing, and I mean nothing can keep you apart. You need to stay busy and dont think about it. I know how easy it is right now to overanalyze every little detail. Don't. Thats just going to bring you down more. Look into the future, always have hope and take care of yourself. Surround yourself with friends and family and remember "this too shall pass"
292934
That is pretty tough to deal with.  I had something similar when I dated a neighbor for a time.  The best thing to do is try to move on.  Get out there and meet some new people.  The worst thing you can do is dwell on the ended relationship, it will only make you feel like crap.
343437
That sucks, I would hate to be in that situation. It is probably because you are used to the fact of her leaving you ever now and again.... Send her a romantic e-mail and keep things ticking.\nHow is she when she leaves?? upset sad what?
306108
If you moved from Michigan to be with her because you love her, her going away to college shouldn't matter if your love is really. because no matter how far away you are from each other your love will always be their. you should be  proud of her and encouraging her for wanting to make a better life for the both of you. let her know that you are behind her 100% no matter what her decision is and that you will always love her and be there for her that is how strong your love is for her. if it's meant to be it will be no matter how far away you are, this is a test of your love.
255068
Have your mind made up. This is the hardest part. Make sure this is what you want. If you think there is still something left inside of you for this person, chances are you will go back and will repeat these steps over again. \nMake a written list of all the reasons why things will be better if the relationship is over. Think of what will happen if you stay with this person, and how many years of your life you could end up spending on an unhealthy relationship. Keep this list close to you at all times. \nThink ahead. Have a day when you decide it's over and you are going to move on. Don't just jump up and leave on an impulse. If you can, talk to that person and say, "When rent is up this month, I am going to find another place" or "I'm moving in with my parents" or "You need to leave at the end of this month." This gives the person time to make arrangements. And, it's much easier to go back on an impulse then it is to go back on a calmly and clearly stated intention. \nKeep the peace. Don't allow the person to suck you into the same old arguments, guilt trips, or drama. State your intention and walk away. Case closed. There's nothing left to do but follow through. \nOnce on your own, treat yourself. If you don't, you may get bored and call this person. Make some new friends and constantly have something up your sleeve. Do things that you were not able to do because of this person. This will let you know that you have still got it and make you feel good inside. \nCut off all communication. Even if you intend to stay friends, it's a good idea to avoid contact with this person for at least a month after you break up. Otherwise, it's extremely easy for them to slip right back into their old role in your life and start the cycle all over again. \nTry not to think about or bring up old memories. If friends start talking about this person, tell them you don't want to talk about it, whether good or bad. Get rid of gifts, photographs, and any other relics of the relationship--or at least put them way out of sight. \nPrepare for the possibility that your ex may say things to your friends, family or co-workers and make you look bad. He or she may not have been ready to let go like you did. Be the mature one and laugh about it. Eventually it will stop. \nRemember that this was just not the "one." Oh well, things couldn't work out. This is life. Make sure you still have what it takes to be good to the next person you are with. Remember the traits of the person you left and compare them to the person to are interested in. This will help it from happening again.
209962
Hey, you know, I am kind of in the same boat as you are, except for I have pretty much gone through having to hear my ex-husband cry to me every single time that I spoke with him to let me know how much is missed me.  I have two young boys with him, and believe me, it has been really hard, but thanks to my dear boyfriend who I now love a lot I have made it through.  I have been thinking about living with my boyfriend too, as my divorce will be in June, but it seems like I can't wait that long.  I don't know, but I just know that women seem to want things done much quicker and we don't like to wait to get what we want.  I would say to do what your heart tells you to do.
191204
I was ALMOST in that situation...\n\nFortunately I realized BEFORE things got too bad (he was just starting to become possessive) & ended it little by little.\n\nI don't know what to suggest - other than what I did - which was winding down the relationship VERY slowly - which will eventually end it & hopefully he will have adjusted to your not being around anymore.
261373
It depends on how badly YOU BOTH want it to work. Since you already have an established relationship, you are already ahead of the game so you have a far greater chance of keeping it that way. You have to make sure you try to keep in touch as often as possible, and when you have the opportunity to see each other just do it. You are probably going to come back home over holidays, spring break, etc, etc, right? So at least you have that. But keeping the communication lines going is more important now than ever. It can be done, it will just involve a lot of work from the 2 of you, and you have to discuss this with him before you leave, or agree to see other people and take the risk of losing each other for good. This exact scenario happened to me when I was 19 as well, and I was together with my boyfriend at that time for 3 years already. He had to go to another city (only 2 hrs away) to get his Masters and PHd. It was hard to maintain but he made it a point to come down every 2 weekends, no matter what. Good luck to you both.