i seen this freind of mine at one of my best friends funerals. he said if i needed anything he would be right there. later on we got really close and he would send me litterally 20 texts each night telling me how he loved me,but he preferd friends with benefits over girlfriends,because he doesnt date, he thinks its redicuolus. one day he just stopped talking to me and sounded annoyed when i tried to talk to him. now he has a girlfriend. and i still really love him.he makes me feel better about losing my best friend. should give up on him?
127492
Sound like you was convenient for him at a time that he wanted you. Now you are no longer convenient so he went on to someone else. Being a man i hate to say this but most men are pigs. They will play with your heart to only get what they want, use you up then throw you away like yesterday news. it also seems like he may have been seeing this other woman when he was playing with you. By what little you say here I think that you may need to move on and learn from this to become a better person and find someone that will treat you with respect and kindness. Lust disguise it self in many faces and say it's love. True love has only one face and you will know it when you find it.
437392
`Is the guy single?  Is he dating your friend?  If he is, would you want your best friend to stab you in the back?  If he is single then perhaps it may he may be fair game?  In any case, I would choose friendship over love.  Plenty of people out there in this world to date.
370174
Well remember, ur friend will always be there for u but guys come and go. If u end up w/him and eventually "u will" break up- odds are. Then what? u don't have him and ur best friend has found another. Let me tell u, I had a very best friend in high sch. and we were inseperable 1 day another friend of mine says;tell her or I will! Sooooo.. my frined say's I F*****-John (my bf) I was heart broken! she almost laughed. She was my best friend!? what the hell? but now he ended up being a loser and she ended up w/3 kids to 3 diff guys and she's w/none. I am married 16 yrs w/2 kids and happy. I know u didn't need to hear my life story but u got it anyway. Chose ur friend! plenty of guys will come along later. Don't b a friend like mine was to me.
58754
been there done that, yes, no matter what u do, men still have their own mind set, if u think this guy isnt right for u just move on, even if u want to be friends he wouldnt want it to b friends he would always want more, that's what happened to me, so i just ended it all!!
424075
You adore him and he knows that, he is taking advantage of your feelings, and you are falling in his game.To have a mature conversation with him could clear everything and if he still say he wants you as a friend...hun, move on!! he is not your friend!!!
530282
You can't help the way you feel, it is being human.  I had a similar situation when I was 17.  I had been best friends with him for 2 years and gradually we got closer and closer.  For me it didn't work out but I am glad I gave it a go otherwise I would all ways wonder what if.  I think life is far too short to have regrets.
19971
personally i agree with you that it is not love , just a fling.\n\ni would move on, but keep in contact with him as friend
642038
I didn't even finish reading your note, but from experience I would recommend ditching him... you deserve someone who can make up his mind and can love you 100%!! I had a fellow like that and I think he kept me around as security, so he wasn't alone and felt loved... don't be his love of last resort! Be strong and move on...
170807
Sounds like he's unsure. I wouldn't bring it up again.  Just continue to be his friend without pressuring him, and he may eventually decide that he feels the same way. If not, you still have a great friend, and those are hard to come by.\n\nEither way, don't wait on his decision -- he may never decide, and you'll waste your time pining after something you can't have.
202466
option 3. he wasn't much of a friend before, and now that you have relationship baggage and nothing strong platonically to bind you from before, there is no friendship to revive here. too much complication and effort on your part. let him go and make different friends, see different guys, be free!!
26622
yes u have 2 move on i spent all of last year in that same situation and it doesnt workout,find another guy ur interested in.he probably isnt gonna leave his g/f 4 u and if he does then he would do that 2 u too.i pretty much had 2 erase him from my mind,it was hard but i did it and im fine now.(if u find a sweetie then go 4 him instead)
31900
I got the perfect answer for you. I've been that guy who is best friends with his ex, my girlfriend was so worried. I ended up dumping her, and a week later I asked my best friend (my ex-girlfriend) back out. Of course she said yes. I would have done it ten times out of ten. I'm giving you fair warning, I think that something might happen.
68371
I think you should move on. Wait until you find someone that finds you more important than his friends.  If they are friends they understand that an intimate relationship is more important!
394833
Yes, I think your absolutely right about everything  you said that concerns you, your friend, and this guy. Just be glad that it wasn't you with this guy no matter how good he flirts or looks. I really feel for your friend because if she gives it up to him he's going to be gone like the wind soon afterwords. Hopefully things won't get that far for him and her, but if they do I hope that maybe she'll learn a lesson from it. You seem like a very smart girl to me. Don't ever let yourself be taken advantage of. Your worth something.
254161
In my experience you really should not have people in your life who do not give you the importance that you feel you deserve. It is obvious that you do not feel that you are receiving what you deserve from this friend. Usually when people feel this way it is because they aren't in the position that they know they should be in. In other words you worth more that what you are getting from this "friend".\n\nMy advice is for you to do two things. First, stop being the one who is after him, keeping the friendship alive. All relationships are composed of two or more people and should involve equal effort in maintaining it. Second never forget that you are worth as much as you believe. So take a stand and do let permit this person to be that way with you.\n\nYou've already talked about, with no results. You've taken the first step. Feel very proud of yourself for that. But now is the time for action. If you still do not see any changes, then you really don't mean so much to him as he does for you.
664958
it's a two way street. any relationship, both partys have to do their part to keep it alive. In your case, doesn't sound like a friend to me. He just wants to use you as his little slave to go fetch things for him. Just imagine if it was a death matter, would he come to your aid? only you know the answer to this. so ask yourself if you want to be friends with him for the rest of your life or, move on. you'll find other frinds who treat you the way you should be treated without asking them. don't pay him any more attention. go your way and do your own thing. if he really has a brain and cares about your feelings, he'll apologize. if not, you'll understand, hes just plain SELFISH. good luck
157540
alright hun obviously there is something going on within your present relationship that has you wanting this other man. But even if there is a man's best friend is a subject YOU BETTER BE PREPARED TO TACKLE IF YOU PERSUE. Because like the saying goes, girlfriends and boyfriends come and go, but a best friend last forever. They've known each other longer than you and trust me from experience they will turn on you. I lost a good man at that time because i persued his best friend. Hun, unless you can deal with the consequences, back off and let him come to you if he feels the same way. If he doesn't then you have your answer and accept it. But if u feel u need to know go for it, but be prepared for what comes down the road