It is easy to describe physical abuse. Does anyone have experience either directly or indirectly with abuse and how people act if they have been abused.
126956
Yes indeedy! right here!\n\nI was depressed and unable to function well for many years.\nMy mother was emotionally abusive.\nAlso all my boyfriends were usually emotionally abusive.\nI don't know to this day how I managed to find emotionally abusive men so well for so long but I did.\nYou wouldn't know it to look at me or talk to me. I was attractive and intelligent with a collage degree. It's just that my life did not go well at all.
120036
YES very. NO one can BEAT You, spanking on the bottom when needed is Sometimes acceptable, BUT Beating NO . next time this is said say : 'anyone ever beats me I am calling the police'. and MEAN it. best wishes for no beatings. there is already enough of us survivors out here, trust me we need no more.
638419
The things that have happened to you are terrible and of course it is abuse.  You really need a trusted adult to help you.  The fact that you were able to post on here means that you are ready to get the help you need.  I'm a licensed psychiatric social worker and I came from a really crappy upbringing too.  My dad was physically abusive and my mom was pretty depressed and didn't stop him.  I managed to get past the abuse and lead a productive life but even today, I remember the abuse and have to deal with the feelings surrounding it.  You are too young and your life is too precious to be lost in the cycle of child abuse.  The sooner you get help the more likely you are to move on successfully with your life.  You don't need your parents permission to seek counseling.  School counselors are an option.  I recognize that trusting adults right now is probably difficult and I'm sure you still love your parents to some extent.  What you need to understand is that if your parents are abusing or neglecting you, they are sick too and need help.  Right now you need to realize that you are worth saving and not all adults are bad.  Your life can and WILL get better.  I don't know where you live and what resources are available there but I would be happy to help you in anyway I can.  Please feel free to email me if you need more help or someone to talk to.  My email is jazzy_59602@yahoo.com.  Please stay safe and reach out to someone.
620958
i've gone through a lot of emotional issues from the time i was little. My father as an abusive ex-drunk and my mom has always been somewhat verbally abusive. How do i feel about it?I hate the fact that i was never really allowed to have a care free childhood and hate having memories of my dad beating me up or having to leave my house at night because my mom and dad had fought.
132681
here's a story about the kind of person i am. there was this guy that abused me...and my friends were very angry about this fact. they arranged to have both of us "out back" of the building when i didn't know, nor he, what it was about. all of a sudden they come at him. i opened the door and told him to get away. THAT'S the type of person i am. i love people. i love my enemies. i pray for them. i will stand for anyone to the point of physical pain. and i have.
118928
Love is not: \n\nCritical            Shaming            Abusive            Controlling            Manipulative\nDemeaning            Humiliating            Separating            Discounting\nDiminishing            Belittling            Negative            Traumatic\nPainful most of the time          \n\n\nRather than simply pondering the rather nebulous question of "Am I or am I not in an abusive relationship?" it is often helpful to look at some specific questions that can bring the abuse to light more subtly by getting past the minimizing, rationalizing, and justifying.\n\n\n\n Try these for starters:\n\nAre you afraid of your partner? \nDo you sometimes feel like you have to walk on pins and needles to keep your partner from getting angry? \nHas your partner ever hit, slapped, choked or pushed you? \nHas your partner ever pulled your hair? \nDo you ever feel like you deserve to be punished? \nDo you ever feel like you've done something wrong but you just can't figure out what it is? \nHave you lost all respect or love for your partner? \nIs your partner very good to you most of the time -- sometimes downright wonderful, but every once in a while very cruel or scary? \nDoes your partner drive you crazy or make you feel like you're going crazy? \nDo you find yourself sometimes thinking of ways of killing your partner? \nHave you believed that your partner would kill you? \nHave you been told by your partner that he or she would kill you? \nHas your partner threatened or attempted to commit suicide? \nHave you thought that suicide would be a good thing for you because everybody would be better off without you or if you'd never been born? \nWere you abused as a child? \nAre there significant periods of time in your life that you can't remember? \nHave you ever done harmful things to yourself like cutting yourself, agreeing to do things you don't like, engaging in reckless or dangerous behavior, etc. because you felt like you should be punished when things have gone badly? \nHave you been forced by your partner to do something you didn't want to do? \nHave you lost all or most of your friends since you've been with your partner? \nHave you put up with something that made you really uncomfortable, or something that you really knew was wrong, because you love your partner? \nDo you feel isolated, like there's nowhere to turn for help, and that no one would believe you anyway? \nHave you lost a job because of your partner? \nDo you have to look back more than a month or two to find anything loving your partner has done for you? \nHave you ever "frozen" when your partner gave you "the look"? \nDo you feel emotionally numb? \nDo you feel like your partner never really listens to you or understands you? \nDo you feel like you have to say that you're doing okay even when you really aren't? \nHave you ever left your partner or had your partner leave because of how you were treated, but later returned or allowed your partner to return after promises that it would "all be different." \nHave you ever pulled back from a relationship with a friend or family member because they voiced concern about how your partner treats you? \nAre you afraid to tell anybody about what's going on in your life because you don't want your partner to get in trouble or go to jail? \nHave you ever had sex shortly after a violent episode? \nHave you ever been in a relationship where you could have answered yes to these questions, but right now you're past all that? \nAre you certain that you're not being abused because: \nyou fight back? \nyou've never been hit? \nyou've never been hit with a closed fist? \nyou've never had to go to the hospital? \nyou've never had a broken bone? \nyou've seen what "real" abuse is like, and it's worse than this? \nyou deserve what you get? \nyou give as good as you get? \nnobody ever treated you thi
210554
emotional abuse to me, is the worst, because emotions take a long time to heal. BUT, having said that, sexual and verbal abuse are also emotionaly abusive. i'd rather have a few cuts and bruises on my body, they heal, but emotions are who you are, and you dont want to scar that.\n\nand honestly, i don't think someone can really ever truelly get passed that resentment, it'll always be in the back of your mind. if he raises his hand just for the sake of raising it in the middle of a fight, you'll flinch, and that  shows that you haven't gotten passed it. you obviously still think about it. its not a healthy relationship. it should be good from the beginning. your relationship is forever poisoned
487821
YES IT IS ABUSE.....On several levels.....Physical, emotional and sexual.....\n\nI am sorry about your situation.....I work as a volunteer for CASA, court appointed child advocates....We work with the court and Judges, to decide what is best for abused and neglected children and where to place them......All I can tell you, is most states have a 1-800# to call and report to CPS (child protective services) abuse.....You can call and they will send out a social worker and interview your family and determine if in fact there is abuse.....Just tell the CPS agent everything you have endured and the abuse.....If your life is in immediate danger, they will remove you immediately and place you in either foster care or with a trusted relative.....Just one thing, what CPS looks for is physical abuse and look for physical marks on your body and will look at the home in general to determine neglect.......Verbal and emotional abuse are very hard to prove.....So, if you don't get removed immediately, it may be because it is more difficult to prove this type of abuse.....If there are any witnesses, to the abuse, that would help too.....If they do remove you, keep in mind, foster care only provides for you physical needs, they are not going to necessarily be supportive.....Hope this helps and please tell someone and call CPS yourself.... Once you are removed, you will get the much needed help you deserve, like counseling, medication for your depression and things will start to look for you.....
304383
I think it's highly insensitive and I'm sure there is more to this story that would lend itself to becoming a little more abusive in appearance. I see other things going on as well and I hope you seek help.
244656
I have not, but I have received two abuse reports.  I am still not sure what I did wrong.  I guess my opinion differed from someone else and that was considered abuse
223442
Yelling at a child is abusive,because it can potentially damper their esteem.ANYTHING said or done that causes emotional trauma,is ABUSE!!!!
120811
Having a physically abusing wife is serious and dangerous not to mention demeaning to you.  While it may not be reported often, because of the stigmatism associated with a man being beat by a woman, it doesn't mean that its not as serious.  \n\nDomestic violence of any kind is very serious, and there are support groups, shelters, and counselors that can help you.  \n\nPlease seek a family counselor to help you get over your physically abusive wife.  You will either help her to stop abusing you, or you will need to leave the marriage for your safety and protection.\n\nPlease call a counselor, speak to your religious leader, or go to a support group in your area.  \n\nDo not ignore this or try to handle it alone.  You should talk to someone about this.  \n\nPraying for your safety and peace.\n\n:o)
610545
i think that you are mandated to report any abuse. even if you aren't if you know some one thats being abused you should tell anyways, mandated or not
52042
I have only been in two physical fights and both were in grade school. This girl followed me home and hit me in the head with her bookbag. Not much of a fight I suppose. The second was with a girl who constantly followed me around telling me my ass was grass (very inmature) Finaly one day I turned around and said. "What the hell is your problem!" "You don't even know me but, if you want to hit me so bad than go for it." I stepped towards her and when she swung I grabed her arm and pulled her into the side of the building. She popped her nose into the brick and fell down bleeding. She started crying and asked me to help her. "I told her I was sorry but that she had asked for it and she could just help herself. I didn't have any problems from her again.
543780
Hello: I would like to make a suggestion. If at all possible please look for a therapist. I'm not suggesting this to be rude. You say that there was a lot of fighting in your life as a child. That is emotional abuse. Yelling, name calling, fighting, screaming matches that is abuse. If you are having flashbacks and repressed memories to me as a survivor of abuse both emotional, and other it seems like there are things that maybe you need unburden your heart with. There seems like there could be a lot of pain to perhaps work out. I have P.T.S.d and flashbacks are something that I deal with  I have anxiety and I have repressed memories. I encourage you to please talk to someone. A pastor, relative, friend, or therapist. Please for if nothing else at all then to help with your blood pressure. I have worked through many problems and still have a long way to go. If it seems like I am reading to much in to this then perhaps I could be. It just sounds like something is troubling your heart.\nGood Luck and I'll keep you in thought and prayer.
257402
Yes, I have been verbally abused.  I have experienced that myself.  It's an ugly feeling.  Even though you don't know what they are saying to you, you know it's something bad because of the tone of their voice.  You can hang up on them if you feel you are being verbally abused.
69002
wHY should life be this horrible....I was mugged and almost assaulted and I was with my sister,that experience lives with us till today.There is nothing you can say,all I wanted was to see my Mom and just run into her arms and just not be anywhere ese.She just took me into her arms and kissed me on my forhead,and held me for a while like she used to do when I was a baby.It felt so good and so cleansing.She gave us (me and my sister)time to just let it sink in,but we also kne she will always be there for us when we were ready to talk about it.And she was and all she did was listen.\n\nNobody deserves to be in that situation and I hope your daughter recovers from the trauma