I went in to a Family Psych Services Clinic last Sat for alcohol abuse. I drink a pint of 80% Vodka 3-4 out of 7 nights a week. No drunk driving tickets, no spouse abuse. I am going to bed earlier, neglecting my workouts. My first appt was last Sat. First he stated he has seen people "down a fifth" at one time. I tried another work related treatment program from my wife's work and she said I have three options, go crazy, die, or get sober. He basically said you can't die from a Pint in the quanity I consume it. I can't tell why I drink. Money is fine, Marriage is fine. (discussed this with my Wife). Employment is stressful, but I feel I can handle and control it. He thought maybe I didnt notice it as I consume the pint on my way home. He sugguested I go down to half a pint this week and seem him this Sat. To see if I feel the true stess from my Job. Does this sound like a "normal" initial phase of treatment? Of course he did the initial assessment questions at my first appt last sat.
123230
just try drinking on the weekends
385067
Why are you still there?  Verbal abuse is just as damaging as physical, maybe more because the wounds never truly heal.  First if you know you have a drinking problem, get help.  No doubt in my mind you are numbing yourself to the abuse, drinking to make it thru each day.  The problem is you're giving him a reason to belittle you and your kids are going to turn on you as well.  Drinking brings nothing but heart ache in the long term.  There are good counselors and idiots as well, remember they are just human beings with crap in their lives as well.  The guy was obviously screwed up to generalize abuse.  The worse part of this entire situation is the setting up of your children to think this is what relationships are....abusive and tragic.  They will look for the same and get the same.  Help yourself so you can help your kids.
330341
go to some ofthe social service clinics an tell them your problem try to get in a aa group asap. a statment from the website ......\n\n\n  Is A.A. For You?\nOnly you can decide whether you want to give A.A.a try —\nwhether you think it can help you.\n\nWe who are in A.A. came because we finally gave up trying to control our drinking. We still hated to admit that we could never drink safely. Then we heard from other A.A. members that we were sick. (We thought so for years!) We found out that many people suffered from the same feelings of guilt and loneliness and hopelessness that we did. We found out that we had these feelings because we had the disease of alcoholism.\n\nWe decided to try and face up to what alcohol had done to us. Here are some of the questions we tried to answer honestly. If we answered YES to four or more questions, we were in deep trouble with our drinking. See how you do. Remember, there is no disgrace in facing up to the fact that you have a problem.
389866
It is hard to figure out this question -- considering that just about everything is misspelled and you abbreviated some things that most of us out here can't figure out.\n\nAlcoholism IS a problem -- that is usually not something that you can get Sick Leave for -- the only reason that could happen is while you are in DeTox (or Rehab Program), and even that will be very limited under most Health/Disability Insurance Programs.\n\nOther than that - PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) IS a treatable Mental Illness -- and with a home fire -- you already have internet access, you are typing, and you are communicating -- I am assuming that you have started rebuilding your life after the fire and that you are in treatment as well for the PTSD.\n\nYOU have made the choice for Alcohol over your work performance or recovery -- and that is a POOR choice for so many reasons, that I do not have the time to list them all here.\n\n('+ really, WHAT ilness')  This is a DIRECT Quote from your question -- do you NOT understand your Alcoholism?  And how that Alcoholism affects job performance?  Have you caused problems at work that you do not realize by being Alcoholic and drunk on the job?
144619
Yes, It does sound as if he is. Ask him if he thinks he is an alcoholic. There's nothing wrong with being an alcoholic, but it can be a very big problem. Especially when stress gets high or serious problems come into our lives.\n\nI am an alcoholic. And it is easy for me to go a few weeks without any drinks. So I don't think your test of, "honey please go without drinking for a few weeks", will work. \nThe worst problem an alcoholic can have ignorance. That's why the first step to recovery is to admit it.\nWhat he should do, after recognizing that he has a problem, is learn to pace himself. Learn to abide by a set limit, but don't throw the limit out after breaking it a time or three. He needs to decide when, when not, where, where not and with whom he drinks. \nThe hardest part of quiting, if that is what he decides to do, is to quit your drinking friends. This is as hard as any lifestyle change and probably the reason most people feel that they can't quit. \n\nThe other problem is you. You put up with his abuse of alcohol. You stay with him. You are not overreacting, you have a life and expectations also. If he isn't meeting those, discuss it with him or leave him. Think of it this way, it's as hard for him to quit drinking as it is for you to quit him. Some times it seems like it could be easy, others not so but only when doing it will you know for sure how much better life can be.\nGood luck.
89132
Sorry, But unfortunitly, you can't help him. UNLESS of curse he wants help. I have a brother who has basically lost everything. House, Wife, Family and most of his friends. Why because he is a BIG TIME DRUNK. He wakes up by the bottle, he goes to sleep with the bottle, and he most likely will die by the bottle. He recently went to jail. YES for aocohol related stuff. He spent 3 months in jail. He couldn't smoke or drink any alcohol. Now keep in mind he was there for three months. I picked him up when he got released and took him home. His girlfriend later told me that when she got to his apartment he was DRUNK and smoking away. Good luck tho I hope he makes it.
310737
WOW! what a question. It is possible that you do have a 50-50 chance.  You marry what you know. Know what I mean? If you feel and know that alcohol is wrong, then you will be on the look out for a non drinker.  If you feel there is nothing wrong with it, you are likely to marry a drinker who could develop alcoholism later in life. Not to mention, if you come from a family of alcoholism, will be likely to become on also. If you see abuse, you will either be an abuser or the abusee.  If you see Christianity, you yourself will most likely become a child of God.  You know what you see.
183546
Please remember she is sick, she suffers from a disease in the center of her mind. Drinking is but a symptom of her disease, it is just the tip of the iceburg. There is a imbalance in her. There is hope! Take her to a detox center, let her take a week to get over the effects of th alcohol in her system, she needs to stabalize, then to recognize her condition. If she can understand that she is powerless over alcohol, she can start a life long journey, one day at a time, to permenent sobriety. A A is the only way she is going to learn the tools she needs to do this. You need to get help as well, Alonon is were you need to be, to learn your tools to recovery. A A was wrote by two people in 1939, since then over two million people have recovered thru this program. 120 different self help groups have been formed using A A principles. A A is in over 100 countries, and has published millions of books, they are very cheap to buy. These numbers are growing every day, it must be doing something right. What do you have to lose? Try it. Remember she is sick, and you would not pinch the I.V. line keeping her alive at the hospital, right?
217996
Make a video of her doing it....what a wonderful world we live in where you can tape just about anything and everything. Yes she has a problem with drinking because she cannot remember anything she does the next day. What she is doing is killing herself and one day may end up in the hospital for alcohol poisioning if she doesn't watch herself. But ya its AA not AAA, I think your A key got stuck hopefully. AA is not a shame but rather a support group for those who have alcohol dependency. I wouldn't knock it if you don't know what it is like.
524485
Your words are exactly what I am dealing with myself. However, I have been self-medicating with alcohol to deal with this anxiety for over 10 years and I now have a serious problem. I thought I would never overdo it but I have as time has gone by ... I am now seeking treatment and wish that I would have pursued other options for my problem. A therapist of mine had great words ... medication - no matter in what form only covers up the underlying problem. Working through the problem and understanding it is the only answer.
350568
From my own experience, I say go and get a better life, as you only have 1 life to live. You try and try, until you spin your wheels.\n\nI was married to a guy for 13 years and we had 3 kids.  He drank every day, and our life was hell.  Life goes on, and now I have a wonderful husband, and we've been married for 15 years.  I bailed and it turned out good.   I went to counseling and Alanon befe I made my decision.  You may find someone wonderful.\n\nThe best thing you can do when dealing with an alcoholic spouse is to detach from the abuse of the alcoholic. You can do this if you truly love your spouse and want to help them to possible sobriety. The more you focus all your energies on the alcoholic, the less likely he is to get sober. This article focuses on how you can detach and remain healthy mentally.\n\nDon’t Make Alcoholism Your Problem\n\nIf you have never read any of the Al-anon material then you probably don’t know that you are making the disease of alcoholism YOUR problem. One of the sad facts of living with an alcoholic is we become just as mentally and emotionally sick as the alcoholic. This happens because every step of life we take, and every breath of air we breathe has some involvement with the alcoholic. Our emotions overtake our own mental health as we try and cope with the deterioration of the alcoholic in our life. What are we doing wrong? We are concentrating too much on the disease, instead of concentrating on our mental and emotional health. We may as well be tipping the bottle for them. Better yet, we may as well be drinking with them!\n\nDon’t Enable\n\nMost spouses of alcoholics don’t realize they are helping their spouse drink just by a few simple behaviors and actions. Several ways in which you may be enabling your spouse to drink is by buying them alcohol, drinking with them, calling the boss and or family members for him because he is too hung over or too drunk to do it himself. Lying to friends, boss, family and co-workers about him and his drinking problem. Taking them to the store, arguing with them, and behaving like a victim. You are not the victim of alcoholism until you make yourself BEcome the victim.\n\nGet Off The Pity Pot\n\nGet off of the pity pot and begin living for yourself, instead of living for the alcoholic. “Oh poor me, everyday I am suffering and I can’t take it anymore” attitude won’t get you anywhere. You need to take care of yourself and that cannot be done if you are focusing all of your attention on the alcoholic and what he is doing or what he isn’t doing. Start focusing on what you can do for yourself. Get out of the house, don’t hang around the alcoholic, and don’t let them abuse you with their words. If you care about the alcoholic in your life, this is what helps them more than anything else.\n\nDetach With Love\n\nYou are powerless to getting your loved one to stop drinking. The first step in being able to detach is by realizing that the shenanigans of the alcoholic is not your problem. Don’t try and fix their messes for them. Not only does this enable them to continue drinking, but also it justifies their drinking. Don’t have any interaction with the alcoholic while they are drinking; that includes, talking and arguing with them. Why fuss and fight with someone who has lost the ability to make any sense? Don’t become ensnared in the alcoholic trap with them. Stay out of the trap, so you can help them. Ninety-five percent of what an alcoholic says is manipulative and hogwash anyway. Don’t start believing in the lies of the disease. Separate yourself from the antics of the alcoholic.\nhttp://www.mayoclinic.com/health/alcoholism/DS00340\nhttp://www.mayoclinic.com/health/bipolar-disorder/AN00920\nhttp://www.maricopa.gov/benefits/pdf/AA/Living_with_Alcoholic.pdf\nhttp://www.connexions-direct.com/index.cfm?pid=152&catalogueContentID=420\nhttp://web4health.info/en/answers/add-living-with-an-alcoholic.htm\nhttp://www.dooyoo.co.uk/archive-lif
438491
I was so bad of an alcoholic that I was put on antabuse to prevent me from drinking. I haven't drank in 4 years. Yes, it is tough. Yes you will feel so thirsty that you feel parched. Yes, it will even be tougher than I am telling you. But all of the sudden, one day, you will get up and the sun will actually fell warm and look wonderful again. The smell of familiar things will make you want to cry again for the love of it not the pain. It does not sound silly. Your wine has been your friend and your comfort. But it has become your enemy now and you have to tell yourself that. Go to alcoholics anonymous and get a sponsor. Someone you can talk to. To relate with. That really helps. And guess what?? After a few years you can have a drink. Just know that when you do, you will drink until drunk and plan for it. I can drink now and control it instead of it controlling me. Because it was my best friend and your sickness knows you better than anyone. Call AA tonite.
378775
Since you typed your question, I don't think you've done any permanent damage.\nNow, you need to think about the future.  I hope this experience will make you think twice before you decide to go out drinking again. One drink should be enough for you, and I would even say none is better!
373732
I have not heard anything about 20 hours of alcohol counseling in Ohio (lived here forever) (attended 72 hour DUI camp).  Having looked around on the internet a little here, I see other states offer this up as punishment.  Not Ohio.  How about contacting North Carolina and asking what program would be comparable to the 20 hours they recommended.  Could you do 20 hours of AA?  I'm reaching here.  Short of that, I you're probably looking at DUI camp.\n\np.s.  You can drink just don't get in your car.
260844
The amount that you are having is fine - it is sustained over drinking or binge drinking that are problems.\n\nGiven that you are not drinking alone (whihc is a sign of alcoholism) - it makes me think you don't have a problem.\n\nI also understand that your husband is worried - particularly if he used to do too much before and feels he needs to be different.  I actually believe that to protect children you need to show them drinking responsibly rather than just avoiding it altogether.\n\neg taking children to the pub for a meal and having a small drink.\n\nThey will then learn that it is OK and not something secret, forbidden or exciting.\n\nMy parents used to give us watered down wine for our sunday lunch - that did more to put me off alcohol than being told I mustn't have any because it's bad (which would simply make me want to do it more).\n\nPerhaps the best course of action is to both (you as well, so he feels supported) head on a counselling course - it'll clear the air and help see that there is a middle ground to binging or abstinence. \n\nPersonally, I've let my daughter have a little taste (which she hated) - when she asked.  And then all the inquisitiveness disappeared from her.  But at least the topic's been broached - which'll make it easier when she gets older and wants to talk about it on a more serious level.
663049
First off, thanks for staying drug-free and passing the test!\n\nNow, please ignore the foolish advice to drink 3 quarts of water -- it's possible to get water poisoning by drinking too much water and it can be FATAL!\n\nYour problem is not unusual at all, actually.  Many people have problems doing this in the presence of another person, especially a stranger.  However, for legal reasons (that actually protect YOU if you're drug-free!) a monitor is required to view the flow of urine from the urethra into the cup and to certify such under penalty of perjury.  In some non-justice related testing, such as pre-employment screening, alternative methods are used to verify that the sample is legitimate such as taking the temperature of the sample immediately after collection.  Unfortunately, this won't work in your case.\n\nYou might ask if a blood test could be used in lieu of the urine test.  Not all jurisdictions allow this and those that do may require you to pay the increased cost for blood testing but it's worth asking the question.\n\nFailing that, you're going to have to work through this on your own.  Try to psyche yourself up prior to the test.  Remind yourself that you ARE drug-free and this test is going to PROVE it to the world.  Picture yourself having successfully completed your probation or parole and NEVER having to do this again.  Anything that will ease the mental block for you.\n\nOnce you get a couple of clean tests, the folks there will come to accept the fact that you have problems doing this and may ease off the pressure a bit.  Actually, they deal with this on a daily basis but there's no way to separate the scammers from the folks with difficulty in providing a witnessed sample until they become accustomed to dealing with you.  In the best case scenario, they might use the same witness each time to help make it a bit easier on your though local policy may prohibit this.\n\nIt does help to have a bit extra to drink prior to reporting to the testing facility.  An extra cup of coffee or can of soda or two will usually suffice.  Don't overdo it though as excessive intake can be dangerous as I mentioned earlier.  It's also possible that the test could come back as "diluted" which would require you to retake the test.  This is a common ploy for drug users to try to cheat the test but it never works and if you're truly drug-free you don't want them to think that you're trying to get one over on them.
266786
I feel like as long as you are responsible you should be able to drink. You made a good point. It's all screwed up!!