This feels kinda uncomfortable to be asking but here goes...\n\nI lost my virginity when I was 18.  It was a one night stand, which was very stupid and I know he didn't really care about me.  The thing is, is that it really hurt and caused me to bleed... a lot.\n\nI'm now 21 and in a long term relationship and me and my boyfriend both feel it's time to take it a step further, but I'm scared of the pain and bleeding... will it happen again?  Please help...
135542
That is so sad to hear, but i dont think that it will hurt because it seem like this one night stand boy done already popped your cherry (not to sound nasty or nothing but the last boy done open you up) it  always hurt at first when they stick it in but then after a while the pain is going to go away
45947
Yes, you have some pain; it's just like trying to break into something that has been closed, and yes it is pleasureable, but if you are not married, please wait.  You will be very grateful.  It will only be disappointing when you began to have sex, and it's not with your husband.  You will start having sex with any tom, charly, and harry that comes along.  If possible, stay a virgin until marriage.  It is only diseases and death when you take a chance.  You never know where someone's mouth has been.  Try to meet someone that has the same mind-set as you do.  Be ye equally yoked.  You will not regret it.  Your body is precious, don't let others abuse it.  It may be the popular thing to do, but it's not the safes thing to do.  Do not let your peers pressure you, and if the do, cut them aloose because they are not your friend!  Save your body for that special someone.
332926
If you really feel you are ready then here is my experience. It can hurt the first time. Your boyfriend needs to know that he will have to go really really slow and wait while you stretch. Some women feel pleasure the first time, some do not. I didn't, but that was just because of the guy I was with. It will be tight to enter. The timing varies depending on the guy. Whether or not you have an orgasm depends on you. Do you masturbate? Have you ever had an orgasm that way? If yes and you can relax this first time you may really enjoy it. My best friend hurt the first time but 15min later she made love again and really enjoyed it and has no regrets to this day 13yrs later.
253885
All I can do is tell you about my first time. I was totally in love, but the guy wasn't. It was nuthin' nice. In fact it was, on the whole, a totally awful experience. When I realized he didn't really care about me, I was devastated. I had thrown away the most precious gift I had to give a man on a jerk who just wanted to say he'd had a virgin. Don't be in a rush, sweetheart. I'm not saying you have to wait for marriage, just make the first time with someone really special. Make GOOD memories! I love you.
303209
well i gave it away I never bleed.. but it was like weird.. there was a pressure and I couldnt really tell what was going on.. it could be because the guy is like maybe 4ines long but yeah it wasnt as cracked up as i thought it would be... and because i didn it it was harder for me not to with my next bf.. because i already gave it up what was i holding on too.. i kinda regret losing when i did.. but cant take it back.. just make sure your not pressured into it... youll regret it later if you do
255143
Im glad to hear that there r  some more smart girls in the  world than i thought!!! i live in europe and rare who loose virginity being 16 or earlier there. I know in US there is different.  Congradulations!!!  Dont be affraid...U know when i lost mine? Last  year, being 21. And im very glad about that. Cause  i found that guy who i want to be with all my life...  And  i am so proud i could had that  moment with him only.  im not sorry   i have been waiting till this moment so long. I remember the minute, wheh i told him i am still a virgin. He was. liek "wow...  im proud.."  trust me, he adores me now, cause  nowadays it is so  hard to find virgin girls..  We r going to get marriage in the future...  And i am so happy :))))))\n\nSo dont   be affraid..If u feel  this is a man u wanna be with,  of course tell him, he is going to be first. I odnt see anything u should be shame of... What going on with the world today...   Why we r trying to get adults so fast..  There r so many pure things, which we r forced to be shame of...\n\nI am with you!!!!\n\nSo wish u luck  on sharing that special moment with a guy u love and wnat to be with.   U will always rememebr that moemnt :))))))))\n\nps. sorry, if my english is not as perfect as i wish it to be :))))))))))
369132
That's a tough call kid.  First it didn't just slip in there, you let it go in somewhat (I am guessing til it began to hurt).  If neither of you orgasmed (c*me) then I think you can still call yourself a virgin, and no one will be the wiser.  \n\nWord of advice.  If you're not ready for his "thing" in your "behind" to slip in again perhaps you two ought to learn other ways to enjoy each other without "things" being stuck in places you don't want them to be.  When you are ready, learn how to do it so it doesn't hurt and how to use condoms and other safer sex tips.  \n\nWe've all been there, 15 is a weird age, so don't blow it out of proportion.
74880
Expect it to be a disappointment. Male or female virgins are not going to have some epiphany when they lose it. Our society puts so much emphasis on sex that the first sexual encounter has taken on almost a religious status. The physical reality is not so romantic or dramatic.\n\nFor the woman, it will be from mildly uncomfortable to painful the first time. She may or may not bleed, but unless there is something wrong, there won't be much blood and the pain is a memory after few few tries.\n\nFor the man, it is a good idea to learn a few things about your body, too. It will not hurt but you need to be responsible just like your partner and you need to make sure you're extreme sensitive and gentle if your partner is a virgin, too.\n\nNo one is going to look stupid unless one of the people involved is an insensitive lout. Don't pretend not to be a virgin if you are, then you're asking for trouble. This is a time for communication and openness. BE CAREFUL!
155920
Fear not, there are others like you, not me though I lost mine at 15. But if you are looking for love, then what does sex have to do with it until you have found the right person. Many people regret losing their virginity to the people they lost it to. Some wish they had waited, it would have made the moment special and more intimate. \nThe main problem is that most people today treat sex like entertainment instead of the complex emotional event that it once was. Sad but true, Best of luck. And keep looking for love, it is looking for you too.
160058
virginity when you got it seems to be a burden that grows.\n\nbut when it is gone ,it will be a loss.\n\nit will suprise some girls ,but it will also blow their mind and somebody might just apreciate it no end and be so much the happier for it.\n\n\nif you got this far ,you could hang on a little longer,25 is a good time to get married any way \n\ndont blow 25 years of control on a cheap thrill.\nthat it keeps getting harder I can well imagine,probably every day.but try to keep it up.
512216
i've had sex before and yes it does feel good but i warn you, wait! it's not a good idea right now while you're not married, you'll be giving yourself away to someone you don't know is your going to be husband. I'm not very proud of what i do but sometimes you get stuck in a rut that you can't get out of. if you like it too much you'll get stuck and then you'll have a greater chance of getting STD's. Even though i don't know you i beg of you as a friend, don't do it yet! you will regret it so much after you do. You will be sore, and yes you will bleed because you're a virign and you're not used to having something up your vagina. Let me ask a question.. are you ready to be a parent? think on that. but wait! don't do it!
146765
Yes my dear, I know what you mean. If you're scared, don't go. \n\nDoes he know you're a virgin? You didn't say how long you two have been dating. If you've dated him a long time and he knows you are a virgin and has been respectful, never questioning you or pressuring you, then it MIGHT be okay. I still think if you are afraid or it makes you uncomfortable, then you should do what feels right to you and not go. If you feel you might be pressured to have sex and you are not ready to, then do not go. \n\nI am not a virgin any more, but know how this feels. Let me share a story with you:\nI am a single woman (previouly married many years ago). I was dating a guy for a few months and I really liked him, but had not had sex with him. We kissed on our dates, and it was very hot, but kept it at that level, just kissing, no "heavy petting". He invited me on a ski trip for a week. We had not travelled together before, or even spent a weekend together, so I was a bit hesitant. (I should have paid attention to that feeling; that was my intuition.)  I really did not think he would pressure me. He had been very well mannered. I would not have gone otherwise. I knew spending that much time together would let us really get to know each other. We got along well and it would be fun, especially because we both like to ski.\n\nOn that trip, he started by wanting me to sleep in the same bed with him. I actually didn't have much choice, the room only had one bed. I should have known right there that a real gentleman would have made sure there were 2 beds or asked me if I was okay with the sleeping arrangements. I felt a little uneasy about it, because I was not ready to be so physically close to him. But I figured it was okay, and kept my gown on. Well, it just got worse each night. By the 4th night he was pissed off that he had "paid to take [me] on this trip and [I] wasn't being accomodating". He got more and more demanding. He flat out told me he "deserved" to have sex with me! He was a real jerk about it! Rather than a really great time, it became a degrading experience for me.  Needless to say, we stopped seeing each other after that. \n\nThat was years ago but I learned a lesson. For me: I would never go on a trip with a man unless we were crazy about each other,already in a commited relationship, and had already made love before that trip. I turned down several trips, but I did not want to be in that position ever again! Yuck!I did not go on a trip with a man again until all of my criteria were met, and what a difference! It was worth the wait.\n\nI commend you for being a virgin. it's a rare thing these days. If you are not ready to lose your virginity, don't!\n\nJust because a man pays for a trip, no woman "owes" a man sex in exchange. I have asked several men (yes, all kinds, including wealthy, well educated, well-mannered upper class men, like the man I had gone on that ill-fated trip with) about this and unfortunately many men seem to think that accepting the invitation of going on a trip is some unspoken code for "there will be vacation sex." They assume "the woman knows [he] wants sex on a trip." So don't go unless you want that too.\n\nYou do what feels right for YOU, not your boyfriend. If he really loves you, he will not pressure you. He will understand. If he doesn't, then break it off. You are special and need to be with someone who truly understands and appreciates you. Good luck!
465760
you might not have had one.  not everyone bleeds....i just answered this question a few minutes ago.  not all girls still have intact hymens (cherries) when they have sex the first time...in fact some girls are born with out them.  totaly normal stop worring about it.  good for you that you didnt have blood drama.
186780
Well it can be normal and it can not. The good thing about it is it doesn't sound like you have to worry yet. To try and answer your question as well as possible I will give you an idea. Some girls just have a tight vagina, or vaginal cavity naturally, I have had sex with my ex gf's and if you like it a little on the more explosive side, yes you might have a tendency to bleed a little bit. The problem is even after you lose your virginity depending on your body structure your hymen can be more present then in other women and it is very sensitive, thats one thing that will not only bleed but it will swell a little and become bruised. More bleeding can come from stretching of the vaginal cavity. There is a lot of things I know I have experienced and it doesnt sound to me like your in danger. To be on the safe side though if it worrys you enough to write about then go to the doctors.
349354
I am 38 and I have had an experience meeting a woman that was a virgin still at 24.  She was apologetic and very shy.  I don't think you should feel bad for being a virgin.  Everyone has a first time - some sooner some later.\n\nAt least being older he would hopefully find your honesty appreciative.  Tell him as a matter-of-fact when an intimate conversation comes up.  Don't sound as though you are making a big deal of it.\n\nAnd if he is hesitant or steps back, just respect it and move on.  There's absolutely nothing to be ashamed about who you are darling :-)  Good luck.
212567
Don't give into the pressure... Keep it as long as you can.. Loving someone don't necessary mean having sex with them. If he's not willing to respect you for your decision, then he's not worth loosing your virginity to. If I can do it all over again, I would love to be a Virgin till the right one comes alone. don't get me wrong sex is GREAT, but doing it with someone you care about and cares about you, will words can't describe it.......
651645
It does hurt most girls when you have sex for the first time.  However, there are many things that you can do to ensure that it wont hurt as much as it normally would.  I sugguest going onto passionparties.com and buying a product called numbit.  A few minutes before you have sex, put some in your vagina around where your hymen (flap of skin that tears during sex) is and it will numb the area.  You might be saying that you want to feel all of it, but trust me... you dont.  If it is going to hurt, it usually hurts a lot.  If it doesnt hurt, your first time is never any good anyway, so it doesnt even matter if you feel anything or not.  \n\nBefore sex, you also need to loosen up a LOT.  You need a lot of foreplay before you have sex, especially the first time to make sure that you are naturally lubricated and open.  If you skip foreplay, you will be freaking out and not dying to have sex, and if you want to have sex really badly the pain of your first time wont be as bad as it would be if you just go at it.  If you have an orgasm before you have sex the first time, that is even better.  Just make sure that you really want to have sex and the area is numb, and you should be fine.\n\nGood luck, and dont expect much from your first time.  It will get better as time goes on.