I have been talking and dating this guy for a year and some months and he hasnt taken me out and i mean in terms of like taking me out to a club or even taking me out to dinner. my moms birthday just passed and i took her out to an upscale resturant for her birthday present. when i told him he was like, 'you dont know how to be a lady in a resturaunt..'. is he ashamed of me?
129660
If you have to ask ... YES, he's ashamed of you. Dump him and get with a guy like me.
372996
I am pretty sure he was showing it around because he was glad that he got invited. if you don't want him to do it again, don't bne afraid to good naturatly teel him that.  and don't be embarrased that people now think that you like him. that wil incraese the chances of him asking you out or somthing of the sort.\nhope this helped and good luck\nand have a happy sweet 16th b-day
185629
ummmm....im a guy so its best that i say that if I was cheating (unfortunately i have), i would probly do just the opposite. Id call all the time to make you seem less suspicious, and id give you excuses as to why i had to go, like, "my mom wants me to help her cook, so i guess ill talk to you l8r", and in reality, some other chick is calling and i dont want to miss the call. But some guys make it obvious, so if you feel that he is, you shouldnt have to feel that way so its probly best that you move on anyways......... you should be able to trust the guy, cuz after all, thats what a relationship is based on....TRUST. hope i could be of assistance even though im like 17 lol.
379922
I think you should go out with him and get to know him before you decide to pursue a relationship. You should let him know that you are not ready to jump into a relationship, after all you have been through stress. I hope he doesn't think that you are gullible and try to use you, but you cant just judge someone and not give them a chance. Proceed with caution.
597267
Well it sounds like he is a man of action and taste to me.\nI am a lot like that myself, I get what I want and no one really knows what to get me.\nSo The nice dinner is a great start.\nTake him out after that to a place that he loves to go. \nAnd dress in something very sexy.\nAfter that take him home and blow his mind with the best sex he has ever had.\nTrust me it will work.
575809
welcome to a mans world with the fear of rejection.  If you don't do anything now, you might pass up a great thing.  You never know until you do something about it.  Ask him if he wants to do dinner sometime.
256821
In every relationship, there is a person who likes to dominate, and a person who likes to be taken care of.  There is nothing wrong with either type, it takes both to make a relationship work.  In this case, it sounds like you both want to wear the pants.  It's going to take some compromise on both your parts.  The man is traditionally the one who provides, and he enjoys doing this for you, so why not sit back and relax a little and let him take over?  It takes a lot of trust to let this happen, which will only bring you closer together.  I'm an independent woman so I used to have the same issue that you had...it took me a while to appreciate a man who opens doors, pays the check at the restaurant, and takes care of me...now I wouldn't settle for anything else.  Good luck to both of you.
545760
Are you sure he's not a very busy person?  Is he already seeing someone else?  Other than that I can only think of two answers:  1)  You're coming across as too needy somehow and scaring him away.....\n2)  Sorry to say, he might not like you much, or just not that way.\n\nIf it was me I would act very nonchalant about it.  Don't call too much, and say you've been busy if he asks.  Or you could come up with a "date" plan yourself.  Pick out a movie that you both could enjoy, and say you're dying to see it and you can't get your friends to go for various reasons, etc.  I don't know how old you are....any "manly" things you could ask him to do for you in your house?  Ask him to make a trip to the hardware or auto parts store with you?  Do you cook?  Tell him you're just dying for some chili but you always have too many leftovers!  You're dying for a banana split at such-an-such a restaurant, but don't want to go by yourself.....etc.  These are ideas for after you give him a tad of the cold shoulder for a couple of days and make sure you're not coming across as needy.   Good luck!  (You also could be coming across as not interested enough!!  I've had that happen to me a couple of times.  You have to figure out which it is!)
612190
To me,it is not as important as to what he does or buys me, but how much effort he put into it.  Anyone can take you out to dinner, etc.  Not sure how old you are but here goes:  I'd like to come home, see candles all over the place, soft music playing, the aroma of a great dinner he took time to cook for me, rose petals on the bed, and candles around the tub for both of us to lie in and just hold each other.  Doesn't cost much, but means a lot.  Just be original.
582507
I believe that the true gentlemen have not all died and gone. I believe that a lot of men are intimidated by the idea of  a liberated woman. I feel that we can talk our men into most anything. Why not talk him into being more of a gentleman. He wasn't passing gas and scratching while he was dating you and taking you out, or was he. In that case, you knew what you were getting. In the other case, ask him to bring that guy back that you were dating and fell in love with. If this is a first date for you, demand that he do gentlemanly things. We blow it because we have sex on the first date and men think we aren't worthy of affection and the chivalrous behavior of gentlemen from back in the day. We are strong and quick to move. Be still, wait for him to open the door before you just snatch it open, wait for him to pull out your chair. It will be hard for him to have dinner with a woman who is still in the car, or better yet standing next to the table at the restaurant. We mustn't forget that a lot of today's men have no idea what this chivalry is, so if we want it, we have to in some cases teach it and in all cases demand it. Respect yourself and the gentleman will act accordingly. In the field of Mental Health, we say that we should tell the kids what we want from them not what we don't want. The same applies here. Tell him that you want hin to be more of a gentleman instead of assuming that he's just an ass. If that is how you see him, that is the behavior you will get. I see my man as a gentleman and he never opened doors for me until we talked about it and then just recently while we were out, i noticed that he rushed to the door to open it for me. It's a process and it has to start somewhere, why not with you. \n\nClarissa\nSylva, NC
101163
for me, it depends more on where we go on the date, not how many dates. [example: if a guy takes me to the movies and dinner or something simple, I'd be comfortable pretty quick. But if he tries taking me to his place or out to a bar, he's gone.]
390523
You might want to really consider a relationship with this person.  That he dated your mother, previously, and now that you are dating him, makes for situation in which he has to operate with some deception.  I wouldn't worry if he was straightforward with you but given that you suspect he lied to you and you haven't discussed this with him, you're relationship might be in trouble.  If you aren't able to communicate to him freely and he with you, then you will need to reconsider your relationship.  Is he lying to you?  Most likely he is, but you have to ask him yourself. Consider the state of your communications in your relationship and consider his answer to your suspicions.  It will tell.  If he comes clean then its ok.  If not, then you might want to consider other options before getting more involved.  Good luck, cheers!
368637
What about having him over for Dinner with your Family to show him how grateful you are that he helped you so that you could be with your family? Maybe he was mean looking because nobody ever took the time to get to know him? Maybe he "looked mean and was not very talkative" due to how he was being treated by coworkers?
361501
sounds like he's up to something, tell him how you feel and even suggest going along with him when he goes out its only fair since he has to be with you when you go out with guys....
368824
sounds to me like he really wants to go out with you - his problem is that he's not v experienced at all this and probably feeling a bit insecure.  \n\nhe's doing what he can to try and find out what's going on in your head and to see where he stands.  \n\nif you like him and the above is true i'd give him the benefit of the doubt and go out with him - have fun and take things at your own pace but reassure him and make sure you're ultra honest.\n\njust my opionion - if it makes sense might be right!!!!\n\nhave fun xxx
146765
Yes my dear, I know what you mean. If you're scared, don't go. \n\nDoes he know you're a virgin? You didn't say how long you two have been dating. If you've dated him a long time and he knows you are a virgin and has been respectful, never questioning you or pressuring you, then it MIGHT be okay. I still think if you are afraid or it makes you uncomfortable, then you should do what feels right to you and not go. If you feel you might be pressured to have sex and you are not ready to, then do not go. \n\nI am not a virgin any more, but know how this feels. Let me share a story with you:\nI am a single woman (previouly married many years ago). I was dating a guy for a few months and I really liked him, but had not had sex with him. We kissed on our dates, and it was very hot, but kept it at that level, just kissing, no "heavy petting". He invited me on a ski trip for a week. We had not travelled together before, or even spent a weekend together, so I was a bit hesitant. (I should have paid attention to that feeling; that was my intuition.)  I really did not think he would pressure me. He had been very well mannered. I would not have gone otherwise. I knew spending that much time together would let us really get to know each other. We got along well and it would be fun, especially because we both like to ski.\n\nOn that trip, he started by wanting me to sleep in the same bed with him. I actually didn't have much choice, the room only had one bed. I should have known right there that a real gentleman would have made sure there were 2 beds or asked me if I was okay with the sleeping arrangements. I felt a little uneasy about it, because I was not ready to be so physically close to him. But I figured it was okay, and kept my gown on. Well, it just got worse each night. By the 4th night he was pissed off that he had "paid to take [me] on this trip and [I] wasn't being accomodating". He got more and more demanding. He flat out told me he "deserved" to have sex with me! He was a real jerk about it! Rather than a really great time, it became a degrading experience for me.  Needless to say, we stopped seeing each other after that. \n\nThat was years ago but I learned a lesson. For me: I would never go on a trip with a man unless we were crazy about each other,already in a commited relationship, and had already made love before that trip. I turned down several trips, but I did not want to be in that position ever again! Yuck!I did not go on a trip with a man again until all of my criteria were met, and what a difference! It was worth the wait.\n\nI commend you for being a virgin. it's a rare thing these days. If you are not ready to lose your virginity, don't!\n\nJust because a man pays for a trip, no woman "owes" a man sex in exchange. I have asked several men (yes, all kinds, including wealthy, well educated, well-mannered upper class men, like the man I had gone on that ill-fated trip with) about this and unfortunately many men seem to think that accepting the invitation of going on a trip is some unspoken code for "there will be vacation sex." They assume "the woman knows [he] wants sex on a trip." So don't go unless you want that too.\n\nYou do what feels right for YOU, not your boyfriend. If he really loves you, he will not pressure you. He will understand. If he doesn't, then break it off. You are special and need to be with someone who truly understands and appreciates you. Good luck!
104154
Im telling you I hate it when this happens!  SOME guys are just soooooo persistent!  I use to bartend and I had one guy who came in every single day just to see if I had kicked my hubby out yet!  He would call the bar and he's send me presents, and tip very very well.  Im really bad at hurting peoples feelings.  I HATE being mean!  cannot help it!  Finally I just had to tell him- ok- here we go- tell him u r lesbian!  lol  Ok maybe not!  lol  I would just tell him- sorry- Im not interested.  Then just kinda avoid him at all costs!!!!  I really do feel for u!  Good luck friend!