a guy walks into a bar and ask for a beer and after he drinks the first bottle he looks in his shirt pocket and he ask for another beer and after that one he looks in his shirt pocket again and sfter about the 10th beer the bartender ask the guy hey buddy why do you keep looking in your shirt pocket after each beer and the guys says theres a picture of my wife in it once she starts to look good i will go home
128108
I'm laughing! *giggle* *giggle*, that's funny!  : o )
14969
A guy is wandering the parking lot at a local bar with his car keys in his hand. \n\nA cop sees him and says "Sir, may I help you?"\n\nThe guy replies "I washh jus lookin fo my car!"\n\nThe cop says "Well where was it the last time you saw it?"\n\nThe guy replies, pointing to his keys, "it wash righ here on da end o dis key!"\n\nThe cops shakes his head then shines his flashlight on the guy, noticing the drunks pants are undone and he is hanging out. "Sir! Did you know your pants are undone and your exposed???!!" \n\nThe drunk looks down, then up at the cop and throws his hands up in frustration, "Damn! I lost my girlfriend too!"
79417
Depends on how many beers I've had.
186785
A old man with bad hearing goes to the doctor with his wife.\nDOCTOR says to old man: I am gonna need a sperm sample urine sample and a stool sample.\nOLD MAN says to his wife: HUH?!? What did he say?!?\nWIFE says to old man: He wants you underwear!!
553770
um, I'm drawing a blank here...\n\nOh, BEER!
61820
It means it has 20% alcohol
547512
BEER! DRINK LOTS OF BEER!
375355
Would you like to come home to a new wife?\n\nIt's like sleeping with somene new, except you're not cheating.\n\nWhen the guys see her photo in your wallet, do they stare?
424455
You can ask your frnd to walk in.
328285
i hope i can finish my beer...
83660
lol...some of the shirts are pretty funny...its weird i saw this bartender wearing the choose sex 1 a couple weeks ago, but i couldnt understand where she said got it. but the 1 problem with the site is the artwork needs a little fixing, i ordered the C.S. shirt but i dont know if i would of if i didnt see it in person..the C.S. takes up the whole back of the shirt, on the site it makes it look like an after thought. maybe they should use actual pics or something.
235488
3 dukes graduates walk into a bar......and start raping people lol oooo man that deserves 10 points
555027
A man walked into a bar, ordered 3 glasses of strong whisky, each glass one third full. He drank the first glass, loitered for a while, then drank the second & ten minutes later the third, after which he left quietly. Since that day, he would turn up every evening going through the same drinking ritual. One evening, the bartender said to him, “You know, I could serve you with just a full glass of whisky rather than 3”. The man said, “ Oh! The other two glasses are my brothers’. They have migrated & I’m drinking on their behalf”. Then one evening ,the man ordered only 2 glasses. The bartender asked sympathily, “One of your brothers passed on?” “Oh no!” came the reply, “It’s just that I have given up drinking.”
402745
Be cool, don't say "I'm your biggest fan," and just buy him a drink. The bartender will let him know who it came from. If he's cool he'll say thanks, in which case you can then coolly tell him how great he thinks he is. If he doesn't say thanks, chalk the five bucks or whatever up to experience and let it go.
112100
drink loads of 6 packs of beer
380567
girls buy drinks for guys for the same reason guys buy drinks for girls. ;-)
360504
Larry and Bob wanted to go out drinking, but they only had $2.00\nbetween them.\nLarry said, "Hang on, I have an idea"\nHe went next door to the butcher's shop and spent the $2.00 on one large sausage.\nBob said, "Are you crazy??? Now we don't have any money left at\nall!!"\n>Larry replied, "Don't worry - just follow me."\n>\n>They went into a pub where Larry immediately ordered two double shots of Jack Daniels.\n>Bob said, "Now you've lost it! Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money to pay for this!"\n>Larry replied, with a smile, "Don't worry - I have a plan. Cheers!"\n>They downed their drinks.\n>Larry said "OK! I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you geto on your knees and put it in your mouth."\n>Said and done, the barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.\n>\n>They continued this, bar after bar, getting more and more drunk, all for free. At the tenth bar, Bob said, "Larry - I don't think I can do this anymore. My mouth is sore and my knees are killing me!"\n>Larry said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage after the\n>third pub!"