I have a 6 year old son. My partner now has been part of his life for 4 years now. He thinks that is his real father. My sons real father has never been part of his life.Should I have his real father sign his right away, and have my partner take over him?? My partner sees him like his own son.
137865
Does his biological father ever see or financially support him?  If not, you don't even have to ask him to sign away his rights.  In most states, if a parent does not attempt to contact a child for two years, the custodial parent can petition the courts to rescind the absent parent's rights.  If this is the case where you are (he has not contacted said child) I would jump on the opportunity to have your partner legally adopt him, as long as that is what he wants as well.  Every kid needs two parents to lvoe and support him.  It sounds like you got very lucky in finding someone who would love you as well as your son.  I hope all works out for you.
96825
You need to decide what is best for you and your child. Is he a caring person who will welcome the baby? Do you think that he would be willing to support the baby?? I think every child should know their father and the father has the right to know he has a child, what he does with that information is up to him.
63236
If you are comfortable with doing that then do it, but I would get a lawyer involved to make sure that you can see your children and get it in writing. They will always know you as their dad and im sure you love them alot, and they are just lucky enough to have another man that loves them just as much as you do.
581964
Do you really want to shake up everyone with this.  You are going to be telling a man the son he thought he had isn't his, a man he thought wasn't his, is his and most damaging is that a young boy's father isn't his father after all.  Unless there is some medical reason, leave this one alone.
105843
Your daughter has the right to know her father. You didn't make her yourself. It doesn't matter that her father has a new family, your daughter still has his blood either way.\n\nThings like this happen everyday, it's not that uncommon anymore.
396621
They were not married during the time of the birth.... so this means that the child has not been legitimized.  Does not matter if he signed the birth certificate are not..... He would have to go through a court proceeding legitimizing this child...... Mother has all rights to this baby until father has child legitimized.... she may do as she wishes
83490
Oh can I relate to/with you on this one!!! I have four kids. He has one. I love this man dearly but making my four walk a narrow line and expect the best is great until it comes to his son who can do,say,etc. what ever in the heck he wants! I simply told him about it. After all, I can live without a man or find another one but my kids are all I truely have and can not be replaced. Equal...the whole house and everyone in it. No one is more special then the other when it comes to discipline! If you are in the wrong, it is our job as the parent to help set the child back down on the right path! Good luck and remember, eventually your kids will notice and hold it against you for not doing or saying anything! Good Luck!!!
407227
I would think any child that is not you sons would be hard to accept. If they are back together tell him how you feel and have him talk to her. If he wont talk to her then you tell her and tell her that you will not be a part of this child's life if she doesn't stop acting this way. If they are not together then you don't need to accept the child and it doesn't need to be in your life. Sorry to say it that way but it is true. Also I think once you see that beautiful baby it wont matter anymore. GOOD LUCK.
657795
OH yes i believe that a man who is going to father a child should have to support that child, there is no way out of it, if you are big enough to lay down and have sex then you should be big enough to take the responsibility of what comes from having sex and fathering a child, im having a problem getting my sons sperm donor to pay up child support, because he doesn't want to take on the responsibility of what brought on both of our actions, i grew up and have taken care of my child in every way, i had dreams of becoming a singer, now im more interested in my child than my dream, i dont now what i would do without my son he is the best thing that came out of that relationship. no my son doesnt know anything about the dickhead who fathered him,but my husband has helped me raise him and is wanting to adopt but the "sperm" donor wont let him, i strongly agree with the child support laws. and they should be in-forced at all cost.not once has he ever tried to make contact with our son, or to see if he needed anything, hes a freaking dead beat dad
472986
Hi Pink, \n\nI think I missed your origional question, but will answer it anyway and come at different angles when I don't know the full story -hope this is useful?\n\nAnyway, what is important is that your ex-partner wants to have contact with his son and that his child wants to see his dad.  If he didn't want to see his son, then there is little you can do to make him and this would be very sad indeed but your own love itself would be enough to provide your son with as much love and happiness that he deserves.  \n\nI am assumming that he does see his dad and spends a lot of time with him, then this is wonderful even though you and your ex will never be anything more than just on good terms for the sake of your son.  Why should you want to cut your ex out of your life when he is the father of your child? - you will just remain in contact purely for the sake of your child and this is good enough for this reason alone.  \n\nNo one says that you should have to be together or love each other just because you did once a long time ago.  People's lives change and so do their expectations and feelings and so if you have moved on, then so should he, but to remain in close contact with his son if he cares anything for him.  His love for his son should be unconditional anyway and shouldn't depend upon whether he loves him because of how you feel about your ex.  If this is the case, then he loves his son for the wrong reasons and truly doesn't care about him because he is wanting you to love him before he can love his son - lots of men will see their children even if their marriage has broken down and because they love their children unconditionally.\n\nIf he doesn't want to see his child because you no longer love him, then the better off your son will be without his father who doesn't love him anyway.  This is a very sad situation, but if your boy is just three, then he will cope a lot better without a father if he is not going to committ to seeing his son on a regular basis and because he loves him regardless of where you stand with your ex.  A child can have just as much love from his mother to compensate and others in the family too, so he won't miss what he isn't getting from his father.\n\nYou can not be held responsible for what your ex decides to do or not do - he is adult enough to bring a child into this world and adult enough to want to be a part of his life whether he is with you or not.  It will be his loss if he does not want to be a part of his own son's life and he cannot force you to love him when you no longer feel that way about him, he has to accept that this is the way it is and you are not going to love anyone who will love their own child on the condition that you are going to love your ex!\n\nYou can still be fond of your ex because he and you shared a life togther once and of course, people don't forget that but just means that the love isn't a romantic one like it used to be but more friends. \n\nor:\n\nIf you are with someone new and he doesn't accept that your ex is a part of your life, then sounds like he hasn't got the child's best interests at heart and is jealous of the fact that your son has another father - in this case, he will be an insecure type of man you are with and doesn't trust in you enough to know that you no longer love your ex and wants to sabotage your son's relationship with his father.  This would be an unhealthy relationship to be in and so I would not allow his jealousy to dictate what is in the best interests of your child and your ex has every right to see his son.\n\nThe same goes for other family - their priority is for the child's welfare and not their own interests. \n\nYou do what is right for you and your child.
276346
Well you should be classified as a legal parent and if she's under 18 or at any age under that then she should only need one parent's signature but it's been a while since my dad brought me to get my first passport so I really don't remember. Check what they have to say about getting them and if you need anything special like both your's and her father's signature on something.
438904
Was he the one who signed the birth certificate?  If so, they would need a paternity test to take the kid away from him... if he's on the birth certificate, it's his right to have the child... she can be proven to be an unfit mother and the kid could be taken from her.. so, I would suggest putting that child with the person who will best take care of her - blood-related or not.
366628
sounds like the two of you have grown apart. to keep a relationship strong, you have to spend time together and he needs to spend time with his son as well. I'm sorry for your situation but if this continues, maybe you need to move on and find someone who will put you and your son's feelings first. love is putting the other person first.
99788
maadidi, My little boy is 4 and he just recently started to become attached to his father. My husband and I have been separated most of his life. Just this past year my husband and I reconciled and my boy has become a daddy's boy finally. Only because he became a part of my sons like on a daily basis. We are now separated again but my husband see our children now at least every 2 days even if its just a few minutes. And he spends all weekend with them and me. Make a bigger effort to spend time with your son. Also you have to find out the things he enjoys and do it with him. Always make him the center of your universe. Good luck.
52442
i think in some states if you are on the birth certificate as the father then you are the father. live in a commonwealth state chances are this is the case.\ni feel badly for the child he/she shouldn't be made to suffer the consequences of the mother. i hope he/she doesn't feel unwanted in any way.
389078
In my experience of NO maintenace at all in 5 years I would advise that the child should make up their own mind, otherwise they will resent you for taking that choice away from them.\nMine are older now and see their father for what he is.\nThe only thing that would worry me in your case is if he tried to leave the country with the child so make provisions of supervised visits if possible.\nGood Luck!!
143828
For an average occidental man kids mean HIS kids. Its a question of culture and it doesnt mean its a right way to think. Personaly i always thought that children have one mother and every male must be a father as it is wroteen in our DNA -this is scientific result of researches as in prehistoric times females were mother of their kids but any male had the obligation to feed and protect any child and usually he didnt know if this or that child comes from him or not. In our time there is a question of money and property. If you have children but for some reason no man -husband- it means that the man who stays with you must share with you and cover the cost of your children and take the whole responsability. Lot of men cannot accept this but in my opinion its wrong. Its too difficult to make a male understand that it doesnt matter finally who is the father and that the important is to help the mother to grow up her kids. Your question is really very interesting and touches one of the biggest tabous of our occidental societies. Anyway i m sure there are men that can think in a more honest and natural way. So dont worry i m sure there is somebody for you out there! Have a nice day!