I did like him and we had some good times together but i never called him, by my choice, he always called me.  I mainly get upset when i see them together. I need an outlet and i need closure. I am not sure if i should talk to him about he is not really the "mature type". but i need this off my chest.
126820
You yourself said it was a fling..leave it..talking to this guy wont make any difference.. if you need it off your chest..post a question on yahoo answers!! As for closure..he is with another woman now..is that not closure enough.. the thing here is your expecting some form of logic in this situation..relationships..even flings dont work this way..live and let live...spend your precious energy on someting and someone worthwhile..including YOU..\nGood Luck..
77644
Maybe he realized that he crossed the limitations...he has cross the off-limits zone..Judging from the way you reacted it seems that you kinda missed this guy,right??? If you still wants to be his friend call him and tell him directly that you're just Friend so that he won't cross again. If he will not talk to you, then fine the least you can do is to let him know that you want him to be your friend.
80740
I've been there and what i did was just start talking to him that way you don't feel so weird to be around him. we both are dating other people and we just talk as normal people b-cuz we realized we cant be as close Friends as we were before but we still hang out with the same people and its better to be talkin to each other than not talkin at all.
530056
Geez, I'm in a rut right now with one.  I want to believe something will really happen, but the longer it goes, and his stories change, I"m starting to feel he's making me play games now.  \n\nI have however made 2 very good friends from the online dateing!  It's like we have been friends forever. The problem was, we weren't compatable with all the lovey, romance, sex stuff.\nBut I'll love their friendship and hold them dear in my heart forever!
371085
Ya, im sorry but it sure sounds like from what you said that he is moving on away from you. Especially the part where you say that he didnt even talk to you yesterday at all. Dont say anything to him just yet, but in your mind start planning what you would do if it ended...like who you think you would like to go out with next..or dont even think about relationships at all for awhile, maybe just take a break. You dont always need to be in a relationship. Take time for yourself (buy yourself one of those mud masks or a new nailpolish youve been wanting, indulge in you!) and your family and think about those things for awhile, ya know. Good luck!
258959
If you broke up w/ him there must have been a reason. What was that reason ? Do you want to go through it all over again ? I think I can relate to what you're saying tho. I went to the city partly to get away fr him for the wk'd after we broke up. Well, we were still talking on the phone sometimes but when he phoned it'd be more like "geeeeeeez... :( " but I'd still answer the phone. While in the city I didn't have a very good time. It felt like my fam was abandoning me or something. Like they were tryna get rid of me or didn't wanna see me, etc. :( I was very hurt. The main reason why I was thinking of moving to the city was to be near my fam too... After that I felt that my ex was the only one who really cared bout me. When I got back home I jut HAD to see him so I went to see him. I told him bout what happened in the city & how I felt that he was the only one who cared bout me. For a whole wk I wanted to be w/ him. I wanted to be w/ him every chance I had. We were @ this pt, just "friends". We went to see Default & I guess he was gonna go home after the concert. I didn't want him to leave. I didn't wanna go home either. He was gonna drink but I didn't really care if he did, as long as I could be w/ him. Well, his mom & sis were gone to the city, so he let me spend the night, which I did. I felt that I wanted to get back w/ him. B/w the day I got back home fr the city to the time we got back together officially was Apr 7th-13th I believe. There was even a time AFTER that that I thought that we'd be together forever. But in the past 2 or 3 wks I haven't been feeling that way. I wanna break up w/ him. When & how is the Q. This'll be our 4th break up. :( \nYou may also experience this as well. Have you broken up in the past ? If you have I think that this will only continue to happen. Don't let it. Be strong. Easier said that done I know, but when you feel like talking to him, call a friend. Maybe even get together w/ a friend or friends. It's better than giving in to urges. Hope this helps !!!
374644
It may be a good idea to remember why you got a devorce to start with.After that if you are still thinking about him just go along for the ride and see what happens.If you rush it things could go bad again.
241229
Sounds like you need to talk to him and tell him how u feel and your sorry for not telling him!!
203965
Look, just because you and him didn't work out as a couple, doesn't mean that you can't just be friends. Me and my ex of 13 years just went out to the movies together today to see "Silent Hill", I paid, he drove. We hadn't hung out for 3 years! I gotta tell you though, we had a blast just hanging out and being friends. I bought lunch after at "Jack-n-the-Box", and he came over to my house to eat it. It was the first time he had ever come to see where I lived since we separated. We have a daughter together, and for her sake, we discussed it, and came to the conclusion that, even though we parted on bad terms, we could set that aside and be friends. She was very happy to know we were being nice to each other. I would never have an intimate relationship with him again, but as a friend, he is a very good guy and a wonderful daddy. Do what your heart tells you. You know in your gut whether or not it would be a good idea to hang out with him again. Just remember that ex'es are ex'es for a reason...it didn't work out. Friendships are always nice to have though if at all possible. Good luck sweetie.
150309
this has happend to me before as well. i stopped all contact with this person. i dont think you should have to put up with a guy who plays games. if someone trully likes you, they would have called. sounds like he is lying about tyring to reach you. let me just say i didnt regret once, letting that guy go. and my life has been less complicated since.
202466
option 3. he wasn't much of a friend before, and now that you have relationship baggage and nothing strong platonically to bind you from before, there is no friendship to revive here. too much complication and effort on your part. let him go and make different friends, see different guys, be free!!
51102
Blessings.\n\nLove, I sympathize with -- and fear for -- you.\n\nI, too, went through that very same thing (eXcept it was an Army recruiter) when I was in high school. He wasn't married, but he flirted with me often, and he even called my house a couple of times. I daydreamed of him in class, and whenever I saw him, there was this overwhelming sensation (read: butterflies in my tummy) that made me giggly. And yes, when he didn't flirt with me (in front of his fellow officers) and chose to flirt with other girls, it did hurt. I was depressed for a while.\n\nSadly, believe it or not, it took me a long time to realize that he and I were never meant to be anything other than close friends. I was a twelfth (12th) grader (17-years-old), and he was in his mid-30s. That's not to say that age was the biggest factor in deciding to just be friends with him... simply, it's to say that I wasn't mature enough (or ready) to handle a committed relationship such as that at that particular time. Also, I became tired (bored, rather) of feeling angry and/or depressed because of him not acknowledging me around others and because of his flirting. If he was really interested in me, he would've made that known. He never did, and so, I found myself not thinking of him as much as I had. Eventually, whenever I saw him, I just said, "Hello," and walked away.\n\nLater, after his inquiry as to why I was giving him the "cold shoulder", I found out that it was only in fun that he flirted with me. I was under the impression that he actually cared for me in a way that friends normally wouldn't, yet he was under the impression that we were both just "playing". He apologized for leading me on, I accepted his apology, and I have not spoken with him since. Sometimes, it's just miscommunication. I didn't appreciate it, but I got over it. Nonetheless, I *do* sympathize with you. Perhaps there is a way you can communicate what you're thinking before it gets to the point where you're left devastated?\n\nWhile we are sharing a similar eXperience, it is also quite different -- the biggest factor in yours being that he is married and probably has a family. You cannot follow your instincts, your 'gut', or your heart in this situation because it doesn't just involve you and this state trooper. This also involves his wife -- the woman he vowed to love, honor, and respect until death separated them. You must take her feelings and thoughts into consideration. Does his wife even know that he flirts with you? And again, just to make sure you aren't under the assumption that he is joking and not being serious, perhaps you should tell him how you feel. Besides, he can only say one of two things... Yes, I feel the same way about you that you feel about me *OR* No, I don't feel the same way about you that you feel about me. It never hurts to ask... y'kno, for clarification...\n\nAll of that being said, I must admit that I am a bit fearful for you. If this man *is* being serious, I would wonder if he's on the border (and we just don't kno it yet) of being a pedophile. You are only 16... Not even of legal age to do much of anything. I would seriously reconsider what it is you are doing with your life. Do you honestly want to be in a "relationship" with him? I shudder at the prospects. God bless!\n\nHope that helped!
538914
He sounds like in actuality he's probably seeing someone else or something triggered his reaction.  Its best that you don't rely on him for answers.  Who cares if he doesn't "give" you closure.  You go ahead and take it.  You tell him how it is.  Tell him that he hurt your feelings and that anyone who truely loved you wouldn't do that.  Tell him that you don't think you can be his friend anymore and then you need to stick to your word.  Go out with some friends and try to get over him.  Don't wait around for him because what he's doing is manipulative and cruel.  All you'd be doing is the exact same thing he's doing to you.  Women tend to allow men to take the action in the relationship and its to our own detriment.  Take control and you'll feel better in the end.  Granted, you're going to be sad for awhile, but just delete him from your immediate circle of availability.
18393
Honey I'm not sure what to tell ya.  Don't give up on him.  Do you have anyway to contact him?  You should tell him how you feel.  I don't know why he hasn't talked to you in a month.  That concerns me a little.  Like I said, don't think bad, think good.  Hope things work out for you.
369108
I had this same exact problem for so long and I am just now coming out of it. It is going to be very wonderful when you come out of this experience knowing so much and able to help other people with the same exact problem. First of all, I want you to think about all the time you've wasted just sitting and daydreaming about him. That's time you could have used to make your life better by doing things you enjoy and you could have made other peoples' lives better. Next I want you to ask yourself, "What has he ever done for you?" It's really hurtful to realize that you've wasted your time wanting somebody that you just can't have but trust me, you will have so much free time once you just stop thinking about him. You have to be willing to stop talking about him w/ anyone, pretty much pretending he doesn't exist anymore. Avoid listening to songs that remind you of him. With the guy that I liked, he was actually undesirable and it took me so long to realize that he just wasn't a good match for me at all. So hang in there and remember there is absolutely nothing wrong with being singe cuz you're waiting for the right guy! You deserve a guy that's young enough and that you can actually go out w/! good luck! e-mail me if ya need to!
535043
Although it may have been the ADD, also guys just want to spend time with they're guy friends. I just went through this I know EXACTLY how you feel. My guy hadn't seen his friend in over a year, i got a couple of text messages and he as well forgot to call. I was heart broken. My uncle explained to me that its not that he was ignoring me or avoiding me, it was that he hadn't seen his friend in a long time and he wanted to do "guy stuff" with his best friend. Because I spend a lot of time with my guy it was hard for me to understand that he could spend time with someone else. Anyways, I forgave him and things are back to normal, always tell him how things make you feel. keep a journal or something every time something happens write it down, you don't have to address it but if it becomes persistent then talk to him about it. It helps and he will listen. Life's too short. Love and learn. good luck.
242208
You are obviously not over him if you still get those "flash backs". You have to learn how to let go. If you have to, keep your distance and avoid him.