I am conducting a study for a school project. For my project I would like to know your age, sex, religious preference and your answer to the poll. If you are uncomfortable with leaving a religious preference please just enter 'withheld' under religion.\n\n\nSome researchers say that living together increases the potential for divorce. What do you think? \n\n\nPOLL:\n\nShould couples live together before marriage?\n\n1) Yes\n2) No\n3) Not sure\n\nThanks for your support!
133385
Age: 27\nSex: female\nReligion: eclectic, spiritual\nAnswer: 1
357314
Sonstraal,\n\nEvery decision is best made based on the principles and direction of the Word of God; however, there are things that just aren’t covered in the Bible. Should you take a certain job or buy a house or move to a different city, etc.\n\nThere are guidelines for relationships in the Bible, and when we choose to violate them, there are consequences. I’m old enough to be your father, so let me tell you from a father’s perspective that, when it comes to relationships, parents often have a very keen sense about who is “right” for you. Parents have God given insight into our children’s character and the character of their potential mate, and we can see if the match is correct.\n\nEven if your parents are pleased with a certain match, you are the one who has to live with your choice. When you reach marriage age, you are old enough to make your own choices and hopefully your parents have prepared you by their example and their words to make wise choices.\n\nYou really should get your parents OK and God’s OK before proceeding with plans to marry. Many traditions are outdated or incorrect, but the tradition of a young man asking a father’s permission to marry his daughter was a good tradition, but regrettably it is out of vogue.\n\nIf you look around you at the people who “loved” each other and later divorced, you will take any godly advice that you can get before you marry.\n\nGod bless.
35004
You need to decide what your beliefs and boundaries are.  If you don't mind living with someone for the rest of your life without a legal marriage, then do it, if not, then give him an option, marriage or you are gone. Most states have the policy of common law marriage anyway, after 5 years (varies per state) of living together you are considered legally married anyway.
525524
People all to often enter into marriage for all the wrong reasons. Half of those getting married look at it as entering a new world but they fail to see all the baggage you take with you.  Too many want to get from marriage and are not willing to give.  Bringing fantasies into marriage only dooms it. To prevent so many divorces I think everyone should live together for at least a year before getting married. They should plan the future they want away from the mate and then compare the plans. \nIf they are really mature they should include a plan for ending the marriage if times get to unmanageable. Instead of looking at that as a negative it should be a positive.  Very few people ever recognize dangers of marriage and even fewer have the guts to plan for the possible separation.
114799
I am not a christian, so I don't know if you want to stop reading right now, but I am religious.  I am also 18, I know I am not you nor am I your girlfriend.  Through my own experiences with the transition from High School to College.  People change and they go there seperate ways.  Now I am not saying this is always the case but most of the time you will find it to be true.  I don't know if you have started living out on your own yet or if you have been living together, or paided taxes.  Because living together truely is a big step, you have to see eachother everyday, which I know doesn't sound bad now, but what if you get into an argument.  You do not have any "quiet space". Some people need that time alone to think about what has happened.  Most states if you get married, they have a penility tax, usally because of your joint incomes.  So you might want to look into those sort of things before hand.   You both are in college and I am guessing a Freshman.  Do you both know what you want to do with the rest of your life? Job wise I mean, I know I am a Freshman and I don't know which road I want to travel yet to see if it the engineering way or the arts way.  Also, if either one of you has the chance of transfering to a better college and then stay behind for the other person, the person who could transfer just lost out on a wonderful oppertunity, to better themselves but they were held back.  Now you might not see it that way, and I am not saying that is how it always is but this is just another way of looking at it.  Now you mentioned you were religious and you have been together for 4 1/2 years, if you are just getting married because you want to have sex then that is a no no.  Christans do not believe in Contraception, that means condoms, the pill, the patch... what ever you want to call it.  So then you have to bring up the question of kids.  Do you really think at your age and at your stage in your life, you ready to have kids?  There is always a possablity.  There are so many things to think about when you are talking about marriage, you have waited this long, why don't you just wait untill both of you have your Batchlers degrees.  Just a side note, my boyfriend and I are going to be getting an appartment together this summer.  We are going to the same college and soon we will have been dating almost a year.  Now we have talked about mairrage, but we have both agreed, when we get our 4 year degree then we might consider it.  Again, we are diffrent people and I understand that.  From my point of view why worry about such things when there is a world that we were meant to live in, and why don't we just live it.
670587
DIVORCE AND SEPARATION  Most of you, say you believe in Jesus, but the problem is, many of you do not want to obey what He & the Writers of the Bible tell you.\n\n"We may claim to love God, but how we react to what his inspired Word, the Bible, teaches will reveal our true thoughts, even the very intentions of the heart." In other words, you have your on thoughts on the matter, & heck with what the Bible says. But I'm going to take the time to explain what the Scriptures say about Divorce & Remarriage.\n\nGod, the Originator of marriage, designed it to be a permanent union. But is there any Scriptural reason for a person to divorce his or her mate—and one that would allow for the possibility of remarrying? Jesus addressed this matter by declaring: “I say to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9) Sexual infidelity by a mate is the only ground for a divorce that will allow the innocent mate to remarry.\n\nIn addition, the Bible’s words at 1 Corinthians 7:10-16, while encouraging marriage mates to stay together, allow for separation. Some, after trying very hard to preserve their marriage, feel they have no choice but to separate. What can be acceptable Scriptural grounds for such a step?\n\nOne is willful nonsupport. When getting married, a husband assumes the responsibility of providing for his wife and children. The man who willfully fails to provide the material necessities of life “has disowned the faith and is worse than a person without faith.” (1 Timothy 5:8) So separation is possible.\n\nAnother is extreme physical abuse. So then, if a mate physically abuses his wife, the victim may separate. (Galatians 5:19-21; Titus 1:7) “Anyone loving violence [God’s] soul certainly hates.”—Psalm 11:5.\n\nAnother ground for separation is the absolute endangerment of a believer’s spirituality—one’s relationship with God. When a mate’s opposition, perhaps including physical restraint, has made it impossible to pursue true worship and has imperiled the believer’s spirituality, then some believers have found it necessary to separate.—Matthew 22:37; Acts 5:27-32.\n\nHowever, if divorce is pursued under such circumstances, one would not be free to enter a new marriage. According to the Bible, the only legitimate ground for divorce that permits remarriage is adultery or “fornication.”—Matthew 5:32.\n\nThe Bible allows only one reason for getting a divorce that frees a person to remarry, and that is fornication (Greek, porneia, gross sexual immorality). If fornication is committed, then the innocent mate may decide whether to get a divorce or not.—Matthew 5:32.\n\nAfter telling the Pharisees that the Mosaic concession of divorcing their wives was not the arrangement that had prevailed “from the beginning,” Jesus said: “I say to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery.” (Mt 19:8, 9)
655330
I think that same sex marriage should be allowed - for a variety of reasons - however I do not believe that any church should be forced into sanctioning it if it goes against what they truly believe in from their perception of the bible or?.  Understanding all of that, I really do not believe that this is what the majority of people who want to be in a same sex marriage are asking for..\n\nPart of the reason that I believe we should allow this is:\n#1 - No matter what one feels on this subject - we need to realize that there are children involved in many cases.  Because those who are currently living together are not entitled to one another's benefits - those children within this family  unit are also not entitled to the other care giver's dental, medical etc.  Why make them less fortunate that others who are living common-law ie: heterosexuals?   I find this very discriminatory.\n\nAlso -\n#2 - what if one of the couple dies?  Perhaps there is a another party also dependent on these two for support - like an older parent?  The one left will not be entitled to any portion of pensions etc. from the one who has died - which could have a devastating effect on the ones left behind.\n\nI don't think that people realize or take the time to think past the sexuality of the couple. \n\nAnd besides - do people stop and ask you what you do in your bedroom??  I don't think so - so why do we always equate same sex partnerships with only sex.  I believe that this shows our narrow mindedness... think beyond the general concept and try and grasp the whole picture!!\n\np.s.  am married with children - but feel strongly about this subject...
571366
I understand. I don’t know what I’d do if I wasn’t married, but let me share some of the things I have learned in almost 20 years:\n\n1) Courtship is important. And long courtships are best. In our fast-paced world, especially as young adults, we are always rushing around. The best way to divorce-proof a marriage begins before you ever meet your mate-to-be, during the dating process. Serial dating, especially when it involves premarital sex, is a course in how to get divorced. We end up hooking up and then when things go sour we run away. Don’t get involved with someone who isn’t a friend. And date at least 2 – 3 years before getting married. That way you can get over the initial 18 month crush where everything about the other person is fascinating and the whole infatuated view of “The way you eat is so cute – it sounds like bells ringing,” to “If you clang your fork off of your teeth again I’m gojng to shove it through the back of your throat.” Not kidding – real conversation between my wife & I in the first year. I’m glad to say she never jammed the fork through my throat and I learned to use my lips as a cushion between my fork & teeth. \n\n2) Keep Christ at the center of your marriage. It seems obvious, but it is essential. Every time you notice that ring on your finger, pray for your spouse. It doesn't have to be long or even audible. Just a quick mental thanks to God for your mate, or a quick thought of, "God be with her/him." \n\n3) Love is NOT give and take. There is no take in love. Read 1 Cor. 13 (the love chapter). Love is giving. I give to my wife. She gives to me. If both are giving no one needs to take. Develop this mindset and remember that this is what marriage is meant for. Eph 5 takes a lot of heat for telling wives to submit to their husbands. But it also tells husbands to submit to their wives. Give + give = love. Give + take = selfishness = unhappy = divorce.\n\n4) Never use derogatory names for each other, even in fun. Husbands, if you call your wife "old lady" that is what you will see in her over time. I call my wife "my bride", especially when I am upset with her. That way I remember that wedding day, all those dreams, etc.\n\n5) When kids are involved it is easy to place them in front of your spouse. While time with kids is important & shouldn't be neglected, those kids will grow up & move out one day. Your mate will still be there and you'll need something else to talk about besides the kids. Make a habit of dating. Guys, even ask your wife out on a date. Arrange the babysitter. Often couples in church can provide a wonderful service for each other by trading Fridays (or whatever day is appropriate).\n\n6) Get to know and socialize with an older Christian couple or two who have a happy long-term marriage. Learn from how to treat each other from them. Remember that we all face similar adaptation issues when we are first married & they have worked those issues out. Talk with them about what they had to work out in either early married years and how they resolved things. This can be one of the biggest benefits you ever have, especially if you come from a divorced family or a family with strained relations.\n\n7) It may seem obvious but pray together. Have individual quite times, but have a shared quite time as well, at least once a week. And no matter how much you think it will hurt or bother your mate, talk. Holding it in doesn't make it go away - it only makes it fester until you explode all over each other. Talk and if agreement needs intervention, see your pastor or a Christian counselor.\n\nMarriage is very frightening - especially for those of us who came out of dysfunctional families. But the single biggest cause of dysfunction in my experience (and in my family) was selfishness. Give to each other & to the Lord, and you too can have a happy marriage. God bless you & best wishes!
518248
Getting married changed my life. Now I have someone who loves me when before I was lonely and sad. I can deal with people on a much higher level than I could before because living with another person makes you more aware of how other people think. I'd like to pass on how to love to my children.
262131
Sex before marriage is not a good idea. I would rather have waited till I got married however, I was young and foolish and wanted experience. Well, after you're experienced what is there to experience more? You keep on having sex, right and so if I were to change this I would have waited for the right time. But this is just my opinion. Different people have different opinions.
427099
Muslim husbands love thier wifes and live with them till thier death.\nThe ratio of divorce in muslim communites is very low as compared to other communities.\nIt is not necessary that we should fall in love with someone before establishing a relationship, we love our mothers, brithers, sisters and fathers dont we.
336970
I would have to say because people here are selfish and dont want to put the others above their own needs and desires... We live in a selfish and self gratifying society here in the states.... It is supposed to be til death do you part but today it is most of the time til one person is unhappy do we part..... Very sad indeed.... Also states like NV allow divorce for most any reason and that is very sad too.... You need to be committed when you get married and be ready to be married! I only feel divirce is necessary for 4 reasons... Adultery, Fornication , abandonment with no intent of ever coming back and if the unbelieving person wants out and also in cases of abuse to the point one person may be killed and also if the kids are being sexually abused and hurt by either partner and they are not willing to get help or change.... These are the only reasons i believe in divorcing.... This is mainly my opinion here but alot of it is Biblical as well...... I dont know all of the answers to this and i hope others can shed light on this as well!
402428
If both the people are mature and don't worry about what their family thinks or the people around them, then yes I think it can work. But then again it's not good to be unequally yoked if religion is important to both the people involved, because that could lead to serious problems for the parents and the children.
91568
I believe that marriage is a symbol of two people wanting to spend the rest of their lives together, sharing everything! I believe a wedding should be simple, peaceful and marriage shouldn't be a big ceremony becuase the truth is most of the time you probably don't go to church unless if your faith is every strong.\nMarriage I believe should be held by the courts only because why should you and your partner spend the rest of your life trying to pay of a debt that the money could have been used for. On the other hand it all depends to u! are u a religious person?????, in this case I would have no doubt in my mind that you should marry in a church because it is seen sacred and beautiful...I believe a person isn't complere without their partner and this is a dramatic event that should be thought throught and remebered as the years go by.
275687
I believe in sex before marriage. I don't believe people should just sleep around though. If you've been with a person for awhile and truly loves them, I think it's ok to have sex.
473739
Hi. I am a Christian woman. I am married now, but did have sex before marriage. I was not a Christian at that time, but did struggle with temptations as a Christian before marriage. I give all glory and credit to Jesus for giving my husband and I the strength to resist temptation before marriage. Our first kiss as a couple was at the altar.\nI think that a vast majority of people who claim Christianity as their religion either do not understand their claim well enough for it to be true and sincere in them or they are too caught up in the temptations of life and not caught up in the focus and strength of Christianity - namely Jesus Christ and His accomplishments in life, death, and the resurrection.\n\nIt is disturbing the number of people who claim allegiance to Christ and then fail to follow Him in His commands. None of us is perfect. Biblically we are all sinners in need of our Savior, Christ, and this issue is yet further proof that becoming a Christian isn't an instant fix of flaws. Christianity is meant to be a process of growing in relationship with the Savior who saved us once from eternal damnation in hell and is saving us daily from our own weakness toward sin which brings death into our lives (although some sins bring death of emotional, relational, social, spiritual, etc. not just the regular physical death you think of.) Those people who are truly "saved" and living daily in a relationship with Jesus Christ through His presence in our lives will WANT to or be motivated to "do the right thing" because we want to please Him. Those who claim Christianity as only a Sunday service or social lifestyle simply will not find the strength or reason, when it comes down to temptation, to do the right thing, or they do it for the wrong reason only to give in later. The reason is that they have not really "meet" Jesus Christ and confronted their need for salvation in a sincere way or they have, but they choose the religious box over the relationship that changes a life.\n\nI hope that helps a little. I applaud you in your stand for No Sex Before Marriage. That is an honorable decision that is too foreign in today's society.
255227
I used to believe it was quite archaic. I always believed in love, and considered it the prime motivaton for marriage. I believed it was the couples sole decision, and no other enity should be involved.  However, as time progessed, my feelings have changed.  In AMERICA, the divorce rate is 50%.  Somethings wrong with the system. I'm rethinking the idea of planned marriages.  They seem to last quite a bit longer.