there is this woman who used to work for my husband long ago,before we got married,and now my husband wants to work with her again.I met her for the irst time some few months ago,and I disliked her from the first moment I saw her,and I told my husband,but he kept brushing it off.Once at her place we had gone for coffee,she was in the kitchen making us coffee in just her bra and panties,and that really bugged me,my husband said,shes always been like that so I should just understand,so I let it slide,the next time we went out with her for coffee again,and she asked my husband if she could have a sip of his coffee,I couldnt believe it!,and I was sitting right there,so I asked myself,what does she do when am not there?I talked to my man again about it, he was like am just overreacting.last night,I was up studying for my exam and my mans cell phone begins to ring,at midnight! Ofcourse it was her,my man was asleep,so I just rejected the call.I feel this was the last stroke,how to react?
125134
Your man needs to tell her to back off.  That is his job.  He should be making you feel secure and happy.  Tell him to get her out of his life.....now!!
540576
They are both lying to you!  Wake up!  Neither of them say anything about the fact that they contact each other - that's one.  Number two is the fact that he got angry when you brought it up.  Number three is her b.s. response that it is all a scheme to make you jealous.  And what kind of friend does something like that? A scheme that they kept a secret?  How is that supposed to make you jealous if they don't tell you about it?  Please...wake up and smell the coffee.  You should get rid of both of them.
374566
Instead of wondering what is wrong or what you might have been done to offend or upset her, just gently ask her today when you are talking on the phone. My motto is....Go straight to the source. \n\nGood luck and I hope you enjoy your party!~
560080
everyone here is bashing the wife. we don't know for certain that she has cheated on him. i don't think she has. how many of us been hurt by a boyfriend or husband who has cheated on us. it sounds like that she forgive him and he done it again and again for his own reasons. right now she is hurt and mad and she feels betrayed by you. sounds like you really hurt her and her world is turn up side down and their is children involved then maybe she trying to figure how to handle this but i think there is more to this story then you are telling. if you love her so much why did cheat on her again and again and now u want forgiveness and win her love back. was you thinking about her when you was cheating on her? did you think of how she would feel when she found out? she doesn't feel good about her self right now and you caused that. now you feel insecure. maybe right now she feels insecure about herself and maybe she is trying to figure out where she went wrong in this and I'm pretty sure you blame her for all of your affairs right? give her time she is going through a lot right now. sounds like she was a very good wife to u and u throw it all away for some one night stands or relationships. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings but she has every right to be mad and upset.
517592
I think it's a little weird that she was pissed when you needed to leave the next morning.  It's almost insecure.  When she cut you off on the phone it does sound like a game.  I bet she is waiting to see if you call her, not IM.  If you really like her, get over the issue of calling her place and give her a buzz. Otherwise sooner or later I'm sure she'll call you. Be careful....it seems too soon for her to be so over the top about you not staying longer.
603926
Ouch, you have been 'regulated to second man' and that sucks-big time. I wouldn't let it faze you too much because you didn't have any real emotional attachment ot Jane. \n\nIf she has done this to you it is an indication of her true personality. Someone who brushes you off like this has no regard to you as a person. Even if she just wanted to be friends by calling you up, she has shown little respect if she treats you like this during the hang out. Even friends don't ignore each other.\n\nI know how you feel-believe me (all guys have horror stories like this) and the best thing you can do is forget about her. Better yet, if she ever calls again, say  your too busy to talk. \n\nNow repeat after me: 'Be gone evil woman' and move on :)
223147
Hi, My X use to do the same exact things! I know exactly what it feels like, unfortunately the last few lies I found out were from my children. He was hangin around with a white trash piece of shit that was his sisters friend. He swore up and down they were just friends, come to find out he had been seeing her off and on for about 12 years! I was married to this asshole for 17 of them! Please please... Listen to your heart, especially with his track record.. make sure for yourself and I hope its not true, but that there isn't another woman! I don't know how I didn't find out sooner. I guess the kids were younger..not sure.. But the things you were saying is just how it was with us.. and he didn't even care when we didn't talk I think he actually enjoyed it because there was less to cover up if I wasn't asking him questions! But please keep your eyes and ears open, and I hope you find nothing but just in case hun.. take it from someone who has been there. Take care good luck and if anything changes please keep me informed or if u need another woman to talk to email or im me anytime! Good luck & be strong! Kim
569406
Honey, you are not overreacting at all.  This man does not respect you.  I know it isn't an easy thing to do, but you need to get counseling.  Seems to me like he's manipulated you all these years.  You've lost yourself in this relationship.  I doubt very much that you are the same person you were before you married this man.  He's cheated on you so many times before, and your retaliation was to cheat on him again, of course, you felt terrible about this, because this was not in your nature.  You stooped to his level.  What you should do is leave.  It's going to be an extremely hard thing to do because you are, well, I guess I can say, you are pretty much addicted to this man.  Just like an alcoholic is addicted to alcohol, you know it's not good for you, but you keep drinking.  \n\nI don't know how old you are, but I can pretty much say that as you get older and you stay in this relationship longer, it's going to get harder.  I speak from experience.  I've been married now for almost 24 years with the same man.  And I am now realizing that I am an individual person. It took me this long to realize that I need to live for myself and not for my husband.  I've spent all my life trying to make him happy and he seems more miserable every day.  Why should I live with that, and why should you.  \n\nHow dare he stop you from working if you want to work.  That's a way of him staying in control of you.  Find yourself a part time job if necessary and open your own bank account, and every time you get yourself a little change put it in there.  Start planning your way out.  You will be so happy when you find yourself again.  And don't forget, God is there for you.  Ask him to guide you, believe me, He will.
508088
Screen your phone calls and answer when it conveniences you.  I wouldn't completely ignore her, but also set a time when you won't answer the phone anymore (example after 9:30pm).  You and your husband having time alone without being interupted is very important.
3478
Yes, a woman with whom I was a really good friend (I will call her Jane) just turned on me and almost refuses to talk to me now. We don't live near each other anymore, so it's not as big a deal now as it once was. But I have no idea what I did or said to turn her against me. I am one who has really good relationships with people and long-term friendships. So this really took me by surprise.\n\nJane and I used to spend hours together every week and a lot of time on the phone. We were both members of the same professional association. I saw her there and she was really rude to me like I had offended her in a big way. \n\nI am still mystified by this situation and it took place nearly eight years ago. I was told, by a mutual friend who asked me about the break up that Jane had done this in other relationships. That made me feel a little less confused, but I am still saddened by the loss of what I considered a great friendship.
26370
I have been married for 7 years in april and my husband and I had a similar fight when we had first gotten married, I now do not work but in a new marriage everything is changing so fast and I think that asking her to quit her job is like asking her to give up her ability to support herself and feel confident, it is her way of having something all her own not having to share it. I think if you give her time and come to a compromise she will come to some common ground with you. But I wouldn't push the issue of her quitting all together. I hope that I have helped some .
545592
I am sorry. I really feel bad but my advice is leave the dog there for a while and when you can find a good place you can take her with you. And about your husband he is a jerk and you shouldn't care about him. Move on in your life and I am sure there are thousands of men out there who will respect a loyal and loving women like you. Don't let anybody hurt your self esteem, not even yourself. YOU ARE A WONDERFUL WOMEN WHO DOESN'T NEED  A S*H*I*T LIKE YOUR HUSBAND TO LIVE.
300672
Why waste your time confronting her when it is him that your really mad at.  She didn't force your husband to cheat with her, she just happened to be the one he cheated with.  After all, who knows what story your husband told her.
53992
Oh my gosh, did you work at the same place I did?  Your story sounded exactly like the situation I had.  Management and supervisory positions had changed at my work and from then on, the nightmare began.  The witch who rose to power was a narcissitic, egotistical backstabber who made it so unbearable for everyone. She continuously found it amusing to berate, belittle and degrade each and every employee in the company by telling us that we were underworked and so grossly over-paid (we all made more $$$$ than her). Someone who is in the psychology field said that this supervisor's had low self-esteem issues (she weighs close to 300 lbs.)and it is satisfying to her to put others down in order to feel better about herself.  She can't control her weight so she tried to control others.  Unfortunately, confronting this supervisor only compounded to the problem, as she could not take constructive criticism from ANY employee...and talking to the owner of the company proved to be useless, as he always avoided any type of problem or confrontation issue.  Since I did not have an advocate or anyone I could really turn to, the stress of going to work every day was taking it's toll on my health.  For peace of mind and sanity, I gave them my two weeks notice but did not burn my bridges upon my resignation. It is a good idea to have something lined up to go to, especially if you need the income and medical benefits.  You really don't want to be at the mercy of your current employer when it comes to recommendations or verifications.  Good luck.....
324241
Fist: DON'T FEEL SORRY FOR THIS CREEP!!!!   Feel sorry for him?  Just imagine him doing the same thing to another girl, which he does or at least probably will.  I am a guy and I used to supervise a call center of almost all women and I always was very careful about not harrassing anyone!  \n\nYou should file a lawsuit, but you probably can't because you probably didn't keep a detailed log of exactly how and when he harrassed you and it would help to have some other ladies there with the same complaints and details.  Probably not, right?  Ok.  \n\nSo at least file a formal complaint with the company so it's on record that this has happened.  Why?  Because then when he does the same thing to other girls (which he will...) and someone else sues him (which will happen eventually if he keeps it up...), your complaint will help her case tremendously by demonstrating that he has a history of harrassment.
243899
i have this kind of female boss. she shouts at everyone and always blames others for her mistakes. she doesn't quite know how to work on a PC and doesn't speak any foreign languages. she always says bad words about me because i'm almost 29 and i'm not married. she got married at 21 and has a kid. she thinks this is the only way for a woman. and also likes to talk on the phone all day long and gossips all the time, gets angry when someone laughs and many other things. she's just frustrated and very sick in the head. \ni used to leave the office everytime she said something bad to me, but at a point i couldn't take it anymore so i said some bad words to her. almost shouted at her and since this happened she hadn't said anyting bad to me again. i don't know if this is the right way to solve your problem. best thing would be to get another job.
177036
Strangely enough, he had to pass the same tests and have some of the same qualifications as to to get hired in the first place.  You don't say what the actual problem is, but being odd in one person's opinion is not grounds for dismissal.  If he is relatively new to the group, could it be that his odd behavior is merely trying to fit in with the click?  I certainly hope he isn't on here somewhere asking the same question regarding you.  Is there a chance the two of you might actually get past this?  I've someone in our office that drives us all insane with all the self-centered drama and constant details she feels compelled to shared, but even in the height of her craziness and each of us plotting her demise, every now and then she shows redeeming qualities too.  I can tell you this...you do need to come to some kind of resolution to your problem.  After a year of this, we are all eating Tums and Tylenol like candy.