My love and I our getting married very soon we both come from different cultures but seem to be working through it is there any advice you can give on how to have our marriage a success and not a failure?
136686
Key factors to making it in marriage:\nHonesty, Faithfulness, Sacrifice, Compromise, Communication, Willingness to accept things, Affection, Patience, and Remembering this is the person you chose to marry no matter what and that you can work through anything cause the good times will out weigh the bad and all couples face the time when they will argue and bicker and it will seem to never end.  If you stick with it you will find that things will work themselves out and you will have a happy life.\n\n\nAlways be honest and remember that it is a full time job.\nNever put each other down for having different tastes and styles and compromise is the biggest part.\nExpress love and always try to stay affectionate, holding hands or cuddling in front of the TV.  When things cool down and become regular and predictable try to spark things up.  \nNever go out of your way to insult tradition or family of your new partner.  Be patient with all the quirky things that may annoy you when you start living together that you may have never payed attention to, you will get used to them.\nNever wait for an apology in a fight, always communicate and try to work things out and try to apologize even if you feel you are right if things get heated.  Never go to bed mad.\nDont try to make your partner jealous and stay away from altimatums.  Good communication will always work better then an altimatum.\nRemember you are married and partying with your single friends is not a good way to start a marriage, you should want your partner with you.\nDont be afraid to tell him when something is bothering you, its better to work through it before it blows up into something big when it could have been resolved early on.\nNever ask the person to change all their ways to appease you or to change anything that you are not willing to change about yourself.\nDont ever make your partner feel that this marriage is one sided and about only you.  Try to make your partner feel like an equal: as simple as asking how his/her day went can show interest in their life.\nGood Luck on your marriage, take it slow and it will be fine.  Communication is the key to any good relationship.
169211
It all depends on how committed you two are towards each other. You have to have that amount of respect for each other not to hurt the other one. My husband and I had a long distance relationship before we were married and although it was hard, we worked through it. You have to have that love and respect for your partner to make it work. If you don't then do not even attempt it. Good Luck!
126763
First be careful, do not leave with him/her.\n\nSecond, be yourself and get to know them.\n\nThird, take your time, do not rush the relationship.\n\nOnline dating can work, I married mine!
634645
Yes, those words can be true, but you need to set goals and make sure you stick to them as best you can. Love is a wonderful thing - but being married means you need to be able to work well with the person you love. They become your partner for life. I met mine when I was your age, and we married in our twenties, so I know it can work. We were good friends first, and then fell in love, and didn't move in together until we married, but we spent many, many hours working on projects and eventually working together in a store and learned that our personalities really meshed well - which rounded out the love we had for each other. My advice: \nFirst, both of you go to college (either 2 yr. or 4 yr. - depending on what you want to do for a living.) \nSecond, save as much money as you can if your folks are paying your way through college. \nThird, work while you are in college and also when you finish college and THEN start making wedding plans. Life is a lot about "getting your ducks in a row". In other words, make reasonable & wise plans, and act on them in the best possible order. If you throw caution to the wind and skip making life plans together and just get married without either of you having advanced training beyond high school, most likely you will live very poorly and will have lots of fights about money that you don't have to pay the bills. The biggest mistake people make is NOT making plans for the future and just "winging it". BIG, BIG, mistake. Best wishes to you!
366571
Ignore the bashers of love in here, most of them wouldn't know love even if it slapped them in the face. My wife and I are the same as you two are, we think the same, act the same, like most of the same things, had very similar dramatic life experiences thats shaped who we are, and we married each other because we saw the bond we clearly had. More importantly, we both knew who we were as individuals, and knew what we wanted. You can't know if your meant to be with someone unless you know yourself well enough to know what feels right for you and know what you want.
208128
I dont think there is a real explination for making a marriage work forever, unless you are an angel or something... Just love, and stay true to the other person and yourself.
160009
expect a lot of adjustments...stop thinking about yourself anymore....and remember...communication is a must!! in your lifetime together not just at the beginning...\n\nfrom what you said..you're lucky enough to know that you are marrying a wonderful man..\n\nbest wishes...cheers!!
405116
Not true....long distance CAN work. Ive seen on a few occasions already that the couple is now married, happy and even have a child together.\n\nIt can happen, but I would take it a step at a time. Good luck.
186384
It seems that the world is probably against you this day in age with quicky weddings and quicky divorces. Alot of the young couples I know get married really quick without thinking everything through. Call it the "want to be a bride" syndrome. Once you live together and share your lives together...things change. But if you really love each other,have talked everything through, and understand what hard work marriagetakes...you may be happy together forever. Good luck!
6412
For us, it has been work.  Lots and lots and lots of hard work.\n\nWhen we got married, I had an idea of what a wife should do, be like, etc. And, I expected her to be this person and our marriage to be a certain way.  So, after working at it for a year (and fighting constantly), I slowly realized that she is who she is and my expectations were wrong.  (She had to realize the same things about me.)  This is when we learned we have to work at communicating with each other and with ourselves. (You will have to learn who you truly are as well as who your mate truly is.)\n\nWe have been together almost 12 years now; she is my soul mate and we are very happy.  But, the communication and understanding that are needed are work.\n\nEvery few months, life will throw a new set of challenges at us and we will have to work at communicating well, understanding things 100% from the other persons point of view, not having emotional reactions to things without asking "Did you mean that way I heard it?" Then, once we have communicated and are in synch with each other, we can tackle the challenges of life together.  \n\nMarriage is not 50/50.  It is 100%/100%, and often you have to give your 100% first.  But, being able to become someones soul mate and their true love is an amazing blessing.  Just keep in mind that sometimes you have to give your 100% first and that is work.\n\nBeing truly in love when you get married is a great place to start growing your life long love together.    But, you have to work to grow life long love.  \n\nPlus, please remember to "actively love".  Don't just love someone and feel that is enough.  You have to pay attention to this person you are marrying, and learn what stresses them out, makes them happy, what they are great at, how best to be supportive,  and which of the family roles that mentally and emotionally hate but that you could do (I do the dishes, because she would rather be beat with a stick than wash another person's dishes.).  In other words, you have to learn who this person really is and how you can help make their life happier.  Ask yourself, "What can I DO, to make my mates life easier, happier, better, etc."  "Active love", which is paying attention to your mate and then doing things you can to improve their life, is also part of true love.\n\nForgive the long answer.  This is just the things we have learned in our 12 years together.  Every relationship is unique.  \n\nGood luck and best wishes to you both.
45396
I met my husband on Valantines day, 2weeks later we were dating, two months later in may we were married. We have been married for 3 yrs and we were both happy we didn't waste time with what we knew was right. Do what you feel is right. there are no timelines you must follow.
424365
If you love him and he loves you, it doesn't matter about the different culture or the age difference.\nDon't worry about what others say. You are two human beings no matter what the differences are. Some say that opposites attract and viva la difference ... so be happy with each other and throw care to the wind.
384436
My cousin had a long time relationship with this girl, he's from Canada and she's from the States. They meet over the Internet and now their married and still in love. I had a long distance relationship and it wasn't that hard to deal with as long as you don't go crazy with a "what if" in the back of your mind and trust your heart that every word spoken is true. Now we live together and I still love him even more then before, and am excited for the years to come. I say if it feels good, and you both can handle the distance between the two of you, give it a try and see as the days go by.
220892
Oh man, my hubby and I will be celebrating our 3rd anniversary this Oct and 5 years of being together. It has taken us a long time to figure this one out. The answer sounds so simple but it can take ALLOT of self control and discipline. The key to a successful relationship is having a forgiving, unconditional love for your partner. Being able to accept blame and admit wrong doing and knowing what to do to change is a big key. When we talk "fight" we do not tell the other what we don't like about them but what we recognize they don't like about us. This way its not assigning blame and creating defensive walls but acknowledging wrong and working together to change. We are best friends, lovers, and we embrace all things together as a team. Marriage is the HARDEST thing to do in this journey we call life but I PROMISE it has the largest rewards! My husband and I got divorced last year and realized on the day of our divorce in the courtroom that we were running from our problems and making the biggest mistake of our lives. You have to go THROUGH your problems, you can not avoid them in any way. Good luck to you
315983
I think every relationship is going to be different.  I've connected with guys right away to where we've skipped the whole "dating" thing and moved on to the "pinned" stage. \n\nI've also been with guys through all the stages .. plus a divorce .. so I think you're pretty down with the steps of love.  There might not be a right way or a wrong way but with the media and family influence I think it's in our minds there's certain things we need to achieve before getting married.  It makes sense !  \n\nI have to watch myself when I start my relationships .. I tend to over plan them and then I find out they were losers to begin with .. haha J/K ..\n\nLove is Crazy ... People have so many different ways of showing it.  You just have to find that one person that loves you for you !
277107
I would have to say that I have a tendency to expect too much, too fast. I am of the age and mind set that I want to be married, and unfortunately I almost lost the man that I truly love because of this. We are happily engaged now, but my insistence on knowing exactly where we were in our relationship caused him to pull away. That was my wake up call. We have since come to a compromise regarding boundaries, and are much, much happier and comfortable with each other. I never would have categorised myself as a pushy person, but I found out that when faced with losing something that I had never had before, I could step back and see the bigger picture. I give advice often about noticing the needs of your partner or spouse and accepting those needs without question, I just wished I would have taken my own advice a little sooner than I did. Peace.
530140
Try to get that into the marriage proposal I'm sure it'll be great.\n\nYes I would still have gotten married. It's called love.