Chuck Norris doesn't "keep it real." Reality keeps itself Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris's motto is "a$$-kickin' good." KFC tried to sue him, but he broke their copyright in half with one kung-fu grip. To this day, all KFC's will cross the street when they see Chuck Norris.\n\nYou know why it's the Golden Arches and not the Gold Rainbow? Chuck Norris.\n\nEven Chuck Norris jokes are scared of Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris is not allowed to sit in the side aisles on airplanes. His body is so dense, the plane is thrown off balance.\n\nChuck Norris seldom flies anymore. His entire body is on the "restricted items" list.\n\nWhen Chuck Norris was a baby and couldn't roundhouse kick, he killed people with his beard.\n\nChuck Norris isn't allowed in vegas anymore. He always hits on 21 and gets blackjack. He also kills anyone he sees playing baccarat, because baccarat is for wusses like James Bond.\n\nChuck Norris loves ballet, especially when it's down and bloody and oozing through his fingers.
126929
God said let there be light Chuck Norris said say please!\n\nGod decided to create the universe then Chuck Norris came out of a dark corner out of no where and said too bad I thought of it first.\n\nChuck Norris, Vin Diesel and Arnold Schwarzenegger are in heaven and they're trying to decide who sits next to God.  Vin Diesel said I should be the one because I'm the most fit, Arnold said he should since he is the Governor of California, Then Chuck Norris turned to God and said God get out of my chair!
207385
Let me enlighten you, then you can decide who would win.\n\nWhen Arnold said "I'll be back" in the Terminator, he was going to ask Chuck Norris for help \n\nKids wear Superman pajamas to bed, Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas to bed. \n\nThe best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.\n\nWhen Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.\n\nWhen asked "How much wood could a woodchuck chuck?" Chuck Norris replied with a roundhouse kick to the face and said "That’s how much."\n\nNow, I've made my choice.
576206
I cant believe what i am reading but it is clear there is more movie fans than martial arts fans on this site. For anyone to think that Van Damme a one time armature kickboxing champion at 19 years old can beat 7 time WORLD KARATE CHAMPION in Chuck Norris is out of there mind.\n\nChuck is not just a actor and he is still active in the Karate world and i don't think that Van Damme would last 20 seconds with Chuck. Van might look tough in his movies but like i said a armature kickboxing champion Vs a 7 time World Karate champion who would you put money on?
570948
More than a bell is needed to save Dustin Diamond this time around. Diamond, best known as geeky Screech Powers on the 1989-1993 teen comedy series "Saved by the Bell," is selling T-shirts with his photo on them to try to raise $250,000 so he doesn't lose his gray two-story house under a foreclosure order. \n\n"If the public didn't care, I as an entertainer wouldn't have been a success," he said. \n\nDiamond, 29, is trying to sell nearly 30,000 shirts at $15 or $20 (autographed) each to supplement the income he makes as a standup comic so he doesn't have to move from his Port Washington home, about 25 miles north of Milwaukee. \n\nThe T-shirt has a photo of Diamond holding a sign that says, "Save My House." The back of the shirt reads, "I paid $15.00 to save Screeech's house." The third "e" was added to get around copyright laws, he said. \n\nHe's selling the shirts on his Web site: http://www.getdshirts.com. \n\nThe foreclosure order was filed last month in Ozaukee County Circuit Court. \n\nDiamond appeared on Howard Stern's satellite radio show Tuesday to plead his case. "I'm doing great with my comedy, but this is definitely a low point," he said. "Real life comes in and affects you." \n\nDiamond doesn't have a listed phone number, and e-mails to the address on his Web site and at an alternative address were not immediately returned Thursday.
344833
No....  They didn't.  \n\nBruce Lee offered demonstrations at some of the Karate tournaments, but he did not compete.  Chuck Norris was a world karate champion who did compete, but according to his own biography and books has never physically used his skills outside a ring or off screen.  (In other words, he's never used his skills in a real self-defense situation.)\n\nThey did, however, informally train together and exchange ideas on at least one occassion according to Chuck Norris.  In an interview Norris gave in one bio-pic on Bruce Lee, Norris said they had an occassion to train in -of all places - the hallway of a hotel.  Norris also states that he was one of those who influenced Bruce Lee to use kicks higher than the waist.  Bruce Lee coming from a primarily Wing Chun background did not think using high kicks in a real fight was a sound strategy.  However, Norris stated he essentially offered to Lee that though practically speaking a fighter might not choose to use kick higher than the waist, the ability to do so offers the fighter greater choices/resources to draw from in a fight.  \n\nHowever, as far as on screen fights, the finale of "Return of the Dragon" between the two is a classic.
289490
A bunch. There was some stupid movie I saw a long time ago with Molly Ringwald in it called "Wild Horses". me and the person I saw it with looked at each other at the end and said, "What the fcuk was that all about?" Then there's the movie "City Slickers" with Billy Crystal. The rest of the people in the theater were laughing like it was the funniest movie ever, but the people I went with did not laugh ONCE. It was the most unfunny, dumbest shyt I ever saw. and finally, there was a Chuck Norris movie (I forget the name) that was so bad I actually walked out about 25 minutes into it, the first and only time I've EVER done that. All I remember about it was that Chuck has to rescue some people and that every few minutes he was fighting somebody but you didn't know why or who the person was or anything. The last straw: Chuck was fighting some guy and he threw the guy off a stair case that had to be no more than four feet off the ground and the guy died! I said, "that's it", got up and walked out.
85890
chuck norris aint a good actor but he is a real genuine guy so get off his back or i will give him your address
439735
the simple truth is that it comes down to the individual and how realistic they train.\n\nThere are some karate schools that train realistically, and some that don't. Shotokahn has a reputation for not training hard at all and just bieng about forms and is useless in a real fight. However, this doesn't mean that there is a school that is realistically training or people in shotokahn that apply it to a realistic setting somehow.\n\nThere is no simple answer to the question because there are too many variables.\n\nThe statement he made about "well why don't we see that art in k-1, or pride or ufc?" is not a statement IMO about the arts uselessness, it is a staement about the art's ability to draw or produce fighters of the mindset to enter k-1, ufc, or pride.  It is an art that may be that way because either: 1- schools don't train that way or 2- the art is just crap.  \n\nIt is unlikely that a martial art is complete crap so it is more likely that it is just bieng taught that way by a vast majority of teachers.
41351
Chuck Norris because he kicks ass on and off screen... Remember if you can see Chuck Norris, he is in front of you but if you can not see Chuck Norris you may be seconds away from death....
331161
Just saw the movie today. I am a Christian and wanted to see it so I knew more to answer the questions that I have been asked by friends. The hardest thing I find to comprehend is why are people being so blown away with it, when it is clear that it is a work of fiction? It is a fiction book, that has just been made into a fiction movie. Dan Brown himself states that the book was fiction and is not based on fact.\n\nJust goes to show how cunning and conniving the devil can be.\n\nAs for the movie, didnt really enjoy it. A bit over the top.
610615
Chuck Norris has been around forever, the recent hype surrounding him has been started on the conan o'brien show, who used to show clips from walker texas ranger at the end of the show as a joke, and now its been almost a year of a long standing joke, and as we all know the are tons of chuck norris jokes making him cooler than he really is. So yea thats where it started
552691
He's always referred to as Jack in the book and by the author of the book, but I don't think the movie ever comes out and says that.  The only reference is when he's reading those books that say, "I am Jack's (whatever)."\n\nEDIT:  Yeah, he was making reference to those books.  I'm saying that every time the AUTHOR (Chuck Palahniuk) makes a reference to that character, he just calls him Jack.  Whether or not that was the original intent is beyond me.  I figure I'll just listen to the guy that wrote the story when it comes to things like that.
167187
-Chuck Norris is the reason that Waldo is hiding.\n-Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.\n-Then again, Chuck Norris doesn't sleep; he waits.\n-Chuck Norris doesn't hunt; the word "hunt" suggests there is room for failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.\n- Chuck Norris' ex-girlfriend once asked him,"How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.?" He then replied," How DARE you rhyme in the presence of Chuck Norris!!" and ripped her throat out. Standing over her, he said," Don't F*** with Chuck." Years later, he recalled this incident and the irony of his rhyme and laughed so hard that people within 5 miles of him were deafened. \n-If rock beats scissors and scissors cuts paper and paper covers rock, what beats all three?? Chuck Norris.\n-If you spell out Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
30492
Chuck Norris knows. He knows everything.
547404
I think what he says rings lots of truth, maybe not for all but take a look at the commercials..who do they target? Those who need financial assistance for college. Right? So what Kerry says from his mouth is also depicted in the commercials and they are they ones most likely to fall for that scheme of serve your country..come risk your life...and we'll help with your education. {No need for that when your dead} and we will send you to college. Come on Bush has said and did more wrong than anyone in this country, stop trying to take focus off of him by putting it on anyone possible. I don't think Kerry would have been the best president but I do say anything could have and would have been better than that crook Bush. ...I find nothing wrong with what he said...honest.. that's the way it is. And that is exactly what the military wants, a fine way to con you into thinking you should give your life for your country, a country that will{under certain rulers} will fuck you every chance they get. And no it doesn't mean he is uneducated...it means he has common sense, which most lack. I think what he said is soooo true, because if you were "smart" you wouldn't fall for the military BS.\n\nTo all you millitary hero's this is not against you, you have worked hard, gave up much and you are appreciated, I also am not saying you are not educated, I'm just agreeing that many who aren't will likely turn to the military for all the false promises they are told.
132735
A roundhouse kick to the head from Chuck Norris ought to do it!
113583
Chuck Norris; it's the unstoppable force vs. the unmoveable object.