now that he is locked up he now saying that he loves me and never meant to hurt me. that he is soooo sorry for all the hurt he has caused me. even though he lied,cheated and was physically and emotionally abusive.now all of sudden im the love of his life and he doesnt want to let me go.crying to me and telling me that i can talk to whoever i want so he can prove that he wasn't cheating??? but is he just saying this cause he locked up and now has no one. should i believe that he is sincere and stay? or should i just let him go?
137442
While he is locked up you should move away, and get an unlisted phone number. Go as fast as you can!  Unless he gets major therapy (which most jails and prisons can't really afford to provide) he will always be an abuser.
112046
why were u with him for so long??\ni've seen couples like this. they usually stay together.\nwhy? - don't ask me; i hate feeling trapped! - but that's just me...\nif it works for u -ok!\nif it doesn't - cut him loose!!\n...although after all this time u're probably used to him and feelin' safe\nur choice..
173821
Well,Believe it or Not ! They Say If You Love Somebody Set'em Free! If They Come Back They Are Yours If Not They Never Were !\n\nWell ! Maybe you will get him back if you stop going after him
291758
Trust your feelings.  Something's telling you this relationship is not right.  Listen to one who's been through the "clinging boyfriend" thing.  I stayed with him for 3 years because I thought he loved me, needed me, couldn't live without me, and all that.  Meanwhile, he was showing his "love" for me by knocking me around, being super jealous and possessive, controling everything I said and did -- I think you know what I'm talking about!  This is NOT LOVE, but a sick relationship.  You can't "save" him, and he won't change unless he gets treatment.  When you break up, he'll even threaten to kill himself or you, or promise to get treatment, or whatever.  Don't accept the guilt -- it's his problem, not yours.  If he gets treatment, fine -- wish him well and keep moving.  But don't go back.  It may sound heartless, but trust me -- he doesn't "love" you, he only wants to "own" you.  He may even think he loves you, but he doesn't know what love is.  Don't mess up your life.  You're not helping him any by letting this relationship continue anyway.  Don't be just one of those statistics years from now (one more abused wife -- or worse, one more beaten to death wife).
179284
reading the details he is sad but he is honest about his intention. \n\nhe is involve with someone that he feels needs him more cause she been hurt by other, the same way he had been hurt. i guess he means love relationship.\n\nanalyzing the situation, he is letting you go and wishing you the best with whom you are with right now.\n\nyou guys must be friends before that is why he can't abandon the thoughts that he still care and willing to be there for you just in case you need him. but telling you ahead of time it will be different relationship cause he is involve with another. \n\nhe sounds so lost but sincere and hurting cause you are far from him. but i guess he is telling you how he feels so you will not wait for him anymore.\n\ni hope you move on and heal your broken heart with people who loves you most..good luck..
378523
your confused b/c he's making you confused, i don't believe he's confused one bit he's just stringing you along, and you are right he is too scared, too scared to completely let go of you all he's doing is talking nonsence to you....what i think is happening here is he wants to keep you waiting for him while he 's out exploring his options, he's afraid you might find you someone else...and he won't have anybody, he doesnt want to get back with you or else he would have, i mean whats stopping him?? all he's saying is i'll just keep playing mind games with her until i find me somebody i really like....don't fall victim, i would surprise him and would tell him to just go on with his life....that you are not meant for each other...get rid of the stress and you will feel so much better.
529222
get out as soon as you can. HE WILL NOT CHANGE., even if he says he will. i know nobodys advice will chnage what your mid is set on, but if you plan on staying in this relationship, it is your fear of him talking, not your love. get away from him and stick to your story about the slap. anything to stay away from him...
97947
If he continued to call you after the break up, then it sounds like he wasn't ready to give up either. Or, maybe he enjoyed being in a friendship w/ you, and when you told him your feelings, it freaked him out. Either way, I'd try to get in contact w/ him to see what's going on. It seems odd to me that he would leave you hanging like that, so maybe something happened to him...try calling. If you get in touch w/ him, and he simply doesn't want to talk to anymore, then yes, it gets better. True love never fades, but it does alter and changes over time. Just give it some time. Good luck to you!
654343
He has absued you mentally, reduced your self esteem, made you believe that you love him so much that you  have to hurt yourself physically for him to believe that he has succeeded. My opnion is that you are too good for him because you are still hanging on. If you try hard enough, i believe that slowly you would get over him and recover back to your original self. All I could do is wish you the best of luck.
627478
the word I love you is powerful only backed up by action. (caring, spending time, being there when you need that person, etc) You were right leaving him because he's just another faker. He knows nothing but to play people's mind. Everybody falls into traps of love nowadays, I can even convince a girl to go out with me without even trying. It works you know. The reason you keep falling into these "traps" is because you do not fully understand what is love and the meaning of it. Not everybody is on the same level. I have fallen into these kind of trap plenty of times, but this is the process of growing up and maturing your mind. It is okay to fall into these trap because you can always learn from your mistakes. Now in order to grow, you have to understand why he left you, what were the signs, what did he do and all that stuff. A common perspective of your situation. He has not showed that he cared for you, he really been there when you needed him, he spent time with you, comfort and hold you. These are the actions to keep his words true. Now if he keeps saying it, it is pointless, he is nothing but a talker. He's the type you should not trust and love completely. If he does back himself up with actions like those things I have mentioned a little bit back, then yea, that is the man of his words. This is just the process of learning and maturing, don't worry. good luck on recovering.
160055
Yes, I was in a similar situation in the past.  It is very hard to find out that the person  you love doesn't have the same feelings as you.  I don't think you should let him go with the hope that he will come back.  It may or may not happen.  It isn't a matter of whether you let him go because is sounds like he has made his decision.  He is probably crying a lot because he knows that he has hurt someone that he does love.  This probably makes him feel guilty.  You really need to accept that he is leaving and make sure that you don't become an old crutch to him after he goes.  If he wants his independence, don't let him keep coming to you when he needs help or gets lonely.  This won't make him come back to you, it will only make let him have the best of both worlds.  It will be hard, but you don't want to end up a doormat.  Take the time to do things that make YOU happy.  Do something that you've always wanted to do but couldn't or wouldn't because you were with him.  Hang in there, it will get a little better each day.  Good luck to you.
9030
My advice to you is MOVE ON! Because if he didn't stop you before you closed the door he meant every word he said. You can't keep a man that don't want to be kept. It's always hard to love someone who can't love you back, but life goes on. Yes you will hurt, you're probably cry everyday but in due time you will heal and will be able to find your soul mate. Never settle for anything, always believe that TOMMOROW IS ANOTHER DAY! Let go and Let God!
532727
Remember, people are ALWAYS communicating with you, even if it is non-verbal.  Right now he's saying that the pain of confrontation and admitting his bad behavior is more painful than trying to repair your relationship.  You have offered to try to repair it through your attempts to contact him.  Now it's time to let it go.  Big talker, right?  I didn't say it was going to be easy, or pain-free, it just has to be done for your own sake.  And believe me, you don't want to feel like you don't give a damn, that would be denying your feelings, your trust in your relationship, and your broken heart.  I'm going to tell you to do something that is going to sound dorky, but I really want you to try it (what do you have to lose?)  Write him a letter.  Say everything you want to say about how you feel, how hurt you are, how angry you are, call him names.  End the letter by saying goodbye and saying how much you will miss the relationship you had.  You will never send this letter.  After you've written it, read it once, then rip it up and throw it away.  I promise you this will help.  You will still hurt, but please do this and you will feel better.  You need closure, and since he's not giving it to you, give it to yourself.  Let me know how it goes.
432928
Seems like he's still a bit emotionally attached but not ready to jump back into a relationship. I'm not sure if this means he's in love with you still, or if he's just having trouble letting go, but either way he seems just as confused as you.\nIf I were you I'd confront him. See what his deal is, and hopefully you can work it out.
123986
it sounds like this is really weighing on your mind.  i am a believer in honesty at all times but wouldnt want to loose a man i was really in love with.  You know your boy friend. think hard about what his reaction may be if you do decide to tell him. If you think he will forgive you maybe tell him?
165212
Your best bet is to move on, now!  He was probably silent from the time he talked about marriage and visiting you until now, because he had other "coals in the fire" and they didn't work out.  If there was a period of "silence" he was looking for a quicker or better way to get here.  He is using you, from the little bit of info you stated, and believe me, he is not serious!  You should move on and live your life and resolve your feelings for this "fantasy man".  Good luck to you in whatever you decide, because it is your ultimate decision, and believe me, I know letting go will be painful and confusing, but since you asked for advice, I think deep down in your heart you know he is using you.  God Bless.
278210
Sounds like he just wanted an excuse to leave. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but its the vibe I get from your description. Try to move on and find someone who will love you and be honest with you. Best of Luck.