It's a female friend.  She always says that she would never go on a date in a bar by herself.  Well, I show up and there she is on one.  No usual female friend, 1:00 AM and bar is 3 blocks from her house.   Basically, she has lied to me at least 5 times over the 6 year friendship.  Should I just move on with my life without her?  She is my only friend in town where I live, but she never wants to do anything because I am a male, and she is afraid we will end up being more than friends.  I am at my wits end and really need some advice if I should confront her, move on, or just go on with the friendship as usual.....
134901
well to me i dont think she is a true friend if she lies to you. And why would she be scared of being more than friends if you have already been friends with her for 6 years. I think you should ask her why she lied to you and if she lies to you then i think its time to make new friends. People who are your friends cant lie to you lie that. So go out and make new friends their are many people out there many friends to make
240525
Its not a bad thing it just means your normal, and no your not a bad friend. She sounds like a lousy person anyways for leading him on. Just give it time and things will come out then you will have your chance. Just hang in there.
603926
Ouch, you have been 'regulated to second man' and that sucks-big time. I wouldn't let it faze you too much because you didn't have any real emotional attachment ot Jane. \n\nIf she has done this to you it is an indication of her true personality. Someone who brushes you off like this has no regard to you as a person. Even if she just wanted to be friends by calling you up, she has shown little respect if she treats you like this during the hang out. Even friends don't ignore each other.\n\nI know how you feel-believe me (all guys have horror stories like this) and the best thing you can do is forget about her. Better yet, if she ever calls again, say  your too busy to talk. \n\nNow repeat after me: 'Be gone evil woman' and move on :)
181072
this will hurt but to be honest she isnt any kind of genuine friend if this is how shes treating u. My advice(Coming from a 35 year old scottish chick whos been there b4 with an ex friend),id walk away from her and cut all ties. Do u realy want to be friends with someone that treats u like that? U deserve better babe.xx
303671
As far as your "good friend" DO NOT LET YOUR MAN GO TO HER HOUSE WITH OUT YOU.  That is your friend not his, I can see if it was his friend.  There have been to many instances when matters like that turn into infidelity.  Be careful with this one.  If I was you I wouldn't allow it, and if he puts up a fight, then he is sleeping with her or if he continues to go without you knowing, he is cheating.  After all she is your friend and he should have female friends of his own.  Another thing, is everything going good between you two?  If there is some fighting and bad vibes I wouldn't allow him to go run to her.  Me and my man had a dicussion the other day about this subject. Something happened between him and his best friends girl, before us.  She came on to him when he was visiting with out his friend.  He left when she tried and he told his friend about it.  His friend did not believe him of course, she called her man before he did.  They use to hang out together and go out so it thought it was okay to go over to her house and wait for his friend to get there.  So you see where this is going you just don't let things like this happen, and you don't put yourself in that kind of predictement.  Not to say that everybody is like that but you don't want to take that chance with your man and your friend.  What we both agreed on is when you are in a relationship and you make friends with with your partners best friend who happens to be the opposite sex neither one of you should be hanging out with that person without your mate around it is not cool, it's some what tachy, and disrespectful, even when you are married.  I mean you have to have a very legit reason to go to your man's male friend house alone, and the same goes for him.  We leave that for the for married people who have established strong trust in each other and their friends.  Couples who have been married for years and their friends play a big part in their life.  Other than that, giiirrrl you better stop that s*** quick!  But sorry to say love, it already sounds like your man is doing your friend so start preparing to kick both of there a***** and dump his loser a**.  Move on and take my advice don't allow your man to see your girlfriends without you.  Just keep your girlfriends at a distance until you find out what kind of man you are dealing with, PERIOD!  Good luck and much love.  If you need to chat later feel free to contact me.
10961
It would help some to know how old you are first.  I will assume that all parties of of legal age (21)since it is not otherwise stated.\nDoes your girl have a drinking problem?  If not it is pretty unreasonable for you to ask her not to drink.  What right do you have?   If she does have a drinking problem, asking her not to drink will not make her not drink.  \n\nAlso, asking anyone not to hang out with their friends is not reasonable what right do you have to tell her who she can and cannot hang out with?  \n\nYou are correct though, she shouldn't have agreed to what you asked, as you are overstepping your bounds as a boyfriend.  \n\nYou ask her to do things that are not reasonable, then you get mad when she doesn't do them.  You don't trust her to start with, then you ask her to keep promises that you know she won't and you then in turn trust her even less.  You are making yourself miserable, you either need to learn what you limits are as a boyfriend (what you can ask another person to do/not do) or you need to get out of this relationship.   \n\nHow would you feel if she asked you to do the same things that you ask of her?  Would you feel it was fair?  You might feel that you are trying to look out for her best interest, but it sounds like it might be coming across as overbearing.\n\n*UPDATED*  I can't solve your problem.  Relationships are hard and yet simple, either you and the other person are happy, or you aren't.  If you both aren't happy, and you've tried to make it better and you still aren't happy, then what's the point of continuing?  You can not change a persons behavior and although, you may want to look out for her and vice versa you can not make her do something she doesn't want to.  Just like she can't make you do something you don't want to do.  You only do it because you want to, you want to please her and make her happy.  It's a two way street, you can give her your opinion and your advice, but you can't make her do anything. If you are happy with her behavior then stay, if not leave; she is going to be who she is, if you don't like that then maybe you don't really like her, but you like who you can turn her into; which again isn't really her.  Regardless, you either stay or leave it is your choice, but know who she is as a person and know that you can only advise and nothing more then that.  *********************\n2-1-06\nIt's sad, she needs to learn to love herself.  She has to learn to do that on her own, sadly; you cannot teach her that.  That's all I have to say about this, and I mean it this time.
539362
+ I really don't know as I don't seem to have that problem. My girl friend was still having guys call to ask her out when we first started (and she still is) and I suggested that the three of us get together and that never happened. Someone was intimidated, but not me. Seems like the guy would always say no, or that is what I was told. I sure hope that is the truth as I would hate to find out otherwise later.  My thought was that if they thought enough of her to ask her out they probably had the same values as I do so they had to be OK guys and maybe they would be valuable people to know. \nI am getting ready to go on a work trip to South America and I told her that it was OK to have dinner with some of them if she wanted, and I guess that was a wrong answer too. So I am busting back to get everything done and every time I turn around I get asked to do more things. I can't understand it. If I were to do the same thing, would I be considered inconsiderate, thoughtless or greedy for attention? I suppose I will never really understand. I really hope that when I return she will have spent at least one full 48 hour period without having consumed any alcohol as I worry a lot about it and sometimes I stay away because of it. Well I hope my thoughts help you sort out yours. \nGood Luck from a guy who is not intimidated and who cares enough to just walk away if the other person would be happier that way. (Been there done that)
563587
It might be over simplifying, but I'd say your friend is looking for some attention.  Something may be seriously lacking in her life that she feels the need to lay something like this on her friends.  I wouldn't end the friendship for her lies, look to what need might make her pull something like this.  Know that once she actually started this lie in motion, she may not know how to go about getting out of it.\n\nIf you believe that she is truly your friend, the best course of action may be to just let it slide.  Don't bring it up, don't give it any more credence when she does, just nod and change the subject.  If it turns out to be true, you can say you didn't want to talk about it because it hurt, but if it really isn't true, then she will be grateful to let the whole thing drop.\n\nThe bottom line is do you care enough for her to let this go?  Or would you get some sort of satisfaction out of calling her on it and making her life hell?  Young people do stupid things sometimes, along these lines, and it shouldn't have to be something they pay severely for.\n\nYou might never do something this stupid, but I'm sure that you have other shortcomings - and you can't expect anyone in your life to forgive yours if you're not willing to forgive theirs.\n\nAre you really friends?  Weigh your options.  and good luck.
504989
what your friend did to you was horrible. I think it's really up to you what you want to do from here- do you want to confront them and have it all out, or would you rather just get away from the situation before it consumes you? Either way, your friend doesn't deserve to be your friend anymore so i would forget about her and move on, clearly she's a pretty low person for wanting your ex.
422908
Case of sour grapes there - tell your friend you're going to give him a chance anyway, and make sure you also arrange another night out with her in case she fears abandonment.  Good luck.
63623
Who's fool are you?  Yes it is possible that they can just be friends but seems to me the seed of doubt is already there. Where there is no trust there is no relationship, and it sounds like you don't trust her. Get out while you can and don't be the fool.
159921
I've had a few platonic female friends.  I've given some hugs and some backrubs.  I've never kissed them.  Your girlfriend crossed the line.  Why would she tell you that "his little thingy got hard"?!?  Definitely past the line.\n\nIt sounds like she is playing games and is at the least trying to make you feel jealous.  At the worst, she is shopping for another boyfriend and just wants to keep you on the line.\n\nIt's hard to convey all the intricacies of a relationship on these little questions.  But from the little you've revealed, I would dump her and cut off all contact.  Until she grows up, she is not worthy to date seriously.
551633
Sounds like she is lonely and likes your company.  Just let her know sometimes that you are going out on your own.  Be nice about it but you have to put your foot down or she will be in your private space forever.  Good Luck.
92532
Sounds like she is trying to be you.  She definitely isn't worth being your friend, but I don't know about picking a physical fight---just seems like a bad idea, especially if she could press charges.
122922
You want to be a good friend and I understand that but if I were in your shoes I would let it happen. If you make a big deal or say anything about it period shes going to wig and maybe end up dating the guy even longer just to spite you and that's just counter-productive. In my opinion she made a bad decision dating one of her friends X's but since that's not the question it's neither here nor there. The point is, she knew how he was before she started dating him, she should have known better. I'm not trying to be cruel but people learn things best firsthand. Be supportive, hope for the best, Maybe your X has changed but be ready to console her and help her move on when he screws her over as well.
286011
I was kind of in the same situation with one of my friends I've known for 10 years.  I think that God has planned a certain amount of time for people to be around each other, you know?  Sometimes friends just grow apart and you have to let go.  What's a friendship without trust?  If she really wants to be your friend, then she should be the one to come and aplogize to you because she was in the wrong for dating him in the first place.
288171
is she in a relationship with the sailor? if she is, then move on and forget about her. she may be using you and your money while he's away. in that case, she will dump you as soon as he gets back.\n\nif she has told you previously that you are just friends, then i would say leave it at that. but don't let her take advantage of you. that's not a real friend.\n\ndon't feel discouraged though about being 22 and not having a gf. you're not alone, and it doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. you will find another girl. don't worry about that.