I have been with with my boyfriend for about 3 years... But im very scared of losing him for some reason because i hear other girls sayin their boyfriends cheated on them and there almost never a happy ending... Is that true guys? Whats the best way to keep your man in your hand...We are probably going to plan to get engaged in a year or 2... How can i keep him to myself... Guys ur views??
136242
First, let go of the fear and trust him.  He will pick up on it and begin to think that you do not trust him.\n   The most important part to any relationship is communication.  It is extremely important for both of you to feel you can go to your partner with any problem, issue or desire, and have an open mind listen to you.  Many relationship fail because there is a lack of communication between partners.  They do not express if they are feeling lonely, unloved, sexually unsatisfied, etc.  If you can communicate these things with each other, talk out and compromise your differences and needs, then that is a huge step to keeping your relationship alive and healthy.\n   Always remember to keep your individualism, while at the same time knowing that you can depend on your partner to be there when you need them.  Don't be afraid though to rely on your partner to help you if you need it.\n   Enjoy each other each and every day as if it might be your last, because in this fragile thing we call life, it could be.  Love each other every day as much as you can.  \n   Most importantly, trust him and your love.  If he truly loves you he will not do anything like that to you.\n\nPeace, luck and love
405438
I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years..and it was the same with us! He was doing the same thing, which is why when we finally got together, people thought he was using me but he wasn't! It's just that guys don't want the world knowing their business. It's easier for them to keep stuff in unlike us girls who have to talk to their best friend about it or other peeps, ya know? I think he likes you. Keep persuing it. Don't give up, you can lose an great opportunity! Good luck!!! =D
487786
Hello:\n\nOne of the hardest things I have ever had to realize is that loving someone isn't enough to make a relationship work. \n\nI was in a long term relationship with a guy, whom I was in love with. The only problem was that he was insanely jealous, and I am a little too trusting. He would assume I was cheating on him, if I had a conversation with a guy friend (a guy friend that I had been friends with long before I met my boyfriend). And if I saw him chatting with a random girl I would just assume they were chatting, and nothing more. I should also say that I have never cheated on a boyfriend, much less cheated on this guy. \n\nEventually he started to push the limits more and more when it came to making me jealous, so much so that he started making out with a girl at a party we had gone to together. Even though afterwards he told me that it didn't mean anything, but that he wanted me to feel jealous, it was too hurt to try to make the relationship work. \n\nWe had a long talk and learned that we had spent so much time trying to hurt each other, that we didn't have anytime to enjoy each other. Obviously our relationship was disfunctional, and I'm happy to say we are both in relationship and are successful and we are still friends with one another.\n\nThe relationship I have now is fantastic. But we still do have problems. The best thing I have done in this relationship is that we face issues head on. But we both know how we each deal with stress. When I am stressed I like to be left alone, where as he likes to be distracted and just take a break from it all. We are able to recognize when we are stressed, and how we can help the other one deal with the problem. \n\nI would suggest that you wait it out. You've been in a relationship that has been successful for so long. Wait until he has started school and starts feeling comfortable there. But be supportive and if he doesn't want to talk to you about his feelings - just let him know that you are there for him if he ever needs to talk or a distraction. \n\nI hope this helps and good luck!
33024
Hello, \nHow are you doing?\n\nLet me tell you a secret if you want a guy to admit his True Feelings instead of admitting them yourself, just adore him. \n\nI mean just adore him for everything he has done for you. For all those good times.\nFor all the fun you had when you talk to him.\nFor al the time he had helped you out.\nBottum line only adore him for all the good reasons but don't over do it.and thats if you really like him ofcourse as If he is the one.\n \nThe only thing was wondering personaly if you have seen him if not in person then atleast web came or internet conversation or something. there are a lot of Flerts/Frauds on the web too you.\n\nHe could be just shy you know, like I was, and my girlfriend did that to me, I felt special, and finaly have some guts to ask her out. Because All I wanted to know what do you think about me. If you would be some ussual girl he might would have not care for anything. 4 years seems a lot, WoW! What do you guys talk about?\n\nBut after you would adore him for that he wil get the idea and trust (if I'm not mistaken) Guys always go with the girl who make them Special.\n\nLet me know how it go?\n& yeah "NO KISS ON THE FIRST DATE.....lol!"\n"A NICE HUG WILL BE JUST FINE PLUS MYSTEIRIOUS"\nGOOD LUCK!
376370
You need to take things slowly. Trust is sure a serious issue for everybody who's been betrayed before. But the thing is, you don't wanna be like that forever. You need to open up slowly. Then if you're dating somebody, you need to talk to him about your trust issues, maybe he can help you deal with them. But ultimately, you have to deal with it alone. You have to see things differently. It's a start, right? Instead of thinking that he's going to betray you or take advantage of you, look at it this way. He trusts you enough to let you see a side of him, isn't it only fair that you trust him too to let him see that side of you? I mean, am I making sense here? It's like doing yourself a favor. Stop thinking about the worst things that could happen. Start thinking of the good things that will happen. I'd say its a good first step. Life is all about taking risks after all.
538642
Ive been with my b&#92;f for 7years now.I'm 23 now,he's 7yrs older than me.For the first 4 years our family's had issues with us being together.we moved in together only 3months into it while i was living with a girl friend.its had its up and downs but has been a great life.my advice to you would have to be,that you continue strong in the relationship that you have,don't worry to much about the negativity that continues to linger around you and your man.If he makes you happy and you know that he is all good for you,then you have nothing to worry about.wish you all the best....
641897
assure him that he will never loose you to that guy or whoever comes along...tell him that you love him so much that he should trust you..just make sure that you'll keep your promises and don't do anything that will make him think that you are not trustworhty..always answer his phonecalls and call him or email him often and tell him he's always on your mind every minute of the day, but you do know that it should work bothways right?
673296
My boyfriend is 43 and I am 25.  We have been together for 3 years now and it is the best relationship I have been in.  I couldn't imagine ever dating somebody my own age again.  They are so immature and in this relationship I feel like there is stability.  I think he will definitely stay with you because men like younger women and if you are good to him and he is good to you, it will work.
590079
I hope you can stand an answer from a woman. When I read this, my heart went out to you. Believe me, I understand. It's good you recognize the first relationship where the guy didn't want kids had to end. That was a very healthy decision and you shouldn't look back on that with regret.\n\nAs for this last guy, I think he's just too immature to deal with his feelings. A guy I dated before I met my boyfriend did the same thing to me. Of course, I wasn't ready to declare my love for him at that point or anything either and then months later, the jerk tried emailing me. Ugh. Anyway, the reason I say this guy is immature about his feelings is because 3 months is a really short amount of time to determine if you love someone. In fact, I'm always wary of when people say it too soon. It makes me think they are just in love with the idea of being in love. My boyfriend and I didn't say those 3 little words until we were together almost a year, but I can tell you, we're both very sure of how much we love one another. I'm sorry you're in this situation and I think this has much more to do with the guy you were involved with than you. I don't think you can determine if it's love in just 3 months time and I don't think you'd want to waste your time seeing someone each day that you didn't think you could invest in a future with. I hope that helps, even if I made you feel a little less alone out there in the world. I've been there before and it's not fun, but if this guy is too much of a tool to see what a bright, self-assured woman he has, then you are much better off without him. Good luck to you.
402715
OMG...all this for a boyfriend? How many boyfriends have you had? I suggest you work on securing your self and not make life decisions based on a non-commited relationship. Yes, non-commited. It really doesn't matter how much he says he cares. If you don't have that marriage certificate, it's a bad decision.
25379
if you really love your boyfriend that much, it shouldn't be an issue...do you want to ruin your relationship with him for this other guy who may not even want a relationship with you? He may just want something else, so you gotta really think if it's worth it. My boyfriend has been gone for 9 months and I'm still very much in love with him, and very faithful. I can't imagine losing him for some "crush"...I alwayz say if you want to cheat, you obviously don't want to be with the person you're with...cuz if you do, you wouldn't even think about cheating. Just tell that guy you have a boyfriend and you're not interested. if he keeps bothering you, don't hang around him anymore.
76091
It doesn't hurt to be honest and sort of confident and tell him, "We should get back together."  Guys respect that.  But DON'T tell him you've been thinking about him a lot and crying over him -- most people get scared off if they find out someone is into them more than the feelings are reciprocated.  Finally, relax and don't worry so much! When I look back on romances I had as a teenager, I realize that none of them were going to last forever, but they are still fond memories.  My only regret is that I took it all too seriously and stressed myself out too much -- in retrospect I would have just relaxed and been more easy-going about everything.
478733
Sounds like you're on the right track but the only thing you can do is to keep it up. Just keep being wonderful and eventually he will have to see that you are different than the rest. I am in a similar position, though I've only been with mine a matter of months and he is still not willing to let down his guard as much as I'd hope. But I know that it will take time and patience for me and it will for you too. Most importantly, don't betray him in any way. Just show him you are infinitely consistent, honest, and trustworthy.
648061
I used to have the same problem. I told him exactly how I felt and broke up with him. 3months later he crawled back on his knees. From then on he has been the perfect boyfriend, even 3years later. \n\nIt really depends, but if he loves you he'll realize that he needs you and come back and treat you better. and if not f*k him, you don't need him if he doesn't need you.\n\nhere are some guidelines for the future:\n*Always put urself and ur happiness 1st\n*If a man wants you nothing can keep him away, if he doesn't want you nothing can make him stay\n*You can't change a mans behavior. Change comes from \nwithin\n*Dont ever make him feel he is more important than you are\n*Dont make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less\n*Demand respect and if he can't give it, he can't have you \n*If you think he is cheating, he prob. is, and if you feel hes lying, let him go\n*Actions speak louder than words\n*NEVER let a man define who you are \n*Know you deserve to be the #1person in the life of the #1person in your life \n***LOVE is a verb.....
596169
Who knows?  Maybe you guys really aren't ready to get engaged.  There's alot of pressure on couples when they get engaged.  People EXPECT that you're getting married pretty soon and they want to know a date and they want to know what you're planning for the wedding.  It sounds like your man shouldn't have promised something that he wasn't sure about.  It's unfair to say that "by this date we will get engaged" because things happen.  It doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't want to get engaged, it just means what he said, you guys aren't ready.  Maybe there's financial reasons behind that.  But a really good solution to this problem (because I know you are disappointed) is if your boyfriend still wants to get engaged and married in the future....he should buy you a promise ring.  My boyfriend and I have been together for four years and we're not ready to get engaged or married yet either.  But a promise ring lets you and your friends and family know that you guys are planning to get married one day, just not right now.  I wear my promise ring on my left ring finger like an engagement ring and I'm very happy with it.  I think you would be too.  Sit tight dear, you'll get married one day.
256148
Tell him you love him and that you woudn't cheat on him and that it hurts you. Tell him that if he won't stop, he would lose you 'casue you can't have a realtionship without trust!
393869
I wouldn't chalk up the quick to throw insult "Cause he's a loser." Obviously you see something in someone who you've been with 6 years. All guys, myself included, hide demons that we don't want exposed. Don't be pushy about it. Don't push him away. Give him space and talk it out with him. Say, "Hey, you know. I want things to be better. I want us to communicate a little better than we do." Don't freak him out by it. Just play it smooth. Surely there are things you hide from HIM as well. Maybe not the same types of things, but things nonetheless. Maybe in a past relationship he's cheated on his girlfriend and feels that if information like that was leaked, you'd trust him less. Us men have our hang-ups, too. We just explain them differently. Good luck, and I sincerely hope your situation gets better.