i'm 22, he is 35 with a 3 yr old girl and 7 yr old son. we have a great relationship and he is ready for me to meet his kids. i just don't want to be looked at as evil and want to make this as easy as possible for him and them.
127217
*HINT* \n\nKids liked to be talked to as adults and they love to be listened too, most adults ignore them or tell them to shut up, they just need to be treated with the same respect. Have fun.
356917
you're 20, it isn't too late and you aren't too far in the relationship to end it. that's never a good excuse-so many women lean against it too. you would be selling yourself short. picture yourself in 20 yrs, i don't think you'd look too happy.\n\nalso if he has young kids he shouldn't be dating anyway, he should be taking care of his children,, because it sounds like he's being a little irresponsible and those poor kids will probably have people coming in and out of thier lives and that's not fair.\n\nyou can love him from far away, but you should be better with yourself.
612390
there is not an exact time it changes by the type of your relationship but if you totally believe him you should met your kids with him, at the first your kids may not like him but believe me kids can sometimes adopt easilier than the adults. good luck :)
510241
well that depends. are you looking for a long term mate or a one night stand.  if it is just a one night stand, then why bring up the kids factor.\nif you are looking for a stable partner, then mentioning kids should be the second breathe you take. think of it as you are not wasting your time because if he doesn't want to be with someone who does have kids, you'd only be wasting your time. it's not like you asked them to babysit. when you say you have kids, you just eliminated the time and effort to find out if he is compatible.
397584
I think, under the circumstances, it would feel weird to know your 55 yo Dad was about to become a father again at not only his age, but your age.  I think it would feel this way to you even if you were younger, there is always a desire of a child to be the only one and to not share the limelight with other potentially limelight stealing brothers and sisters.  Also, watching him interact with one, and probably differently than he did with you could present some uncomfortable comparisons.  But should you feel bad about having negative thoughts?  ABSOLUTELY NOT!  If you act on them, then yes, but for thinking them?  NO!  Just try and get it behind you and see if you can project a more positive thought to your new half brother or sister.  He must have one young girlfriend, eh?  LOL!  Good luck!
199087
If he doesn't want to be with her she should understand that and be a woman, she should also stop using there kids as a crutch he can be with you and his children without sacrificing or neglecting anyone it will just take some hard work and time on both parts. but seeing both parents aren't adults it will be considerably hard. goodluck.
63702
I am a 35 year old father of three girls....\n\nPlease, for your sake, be carefull with what you throw out there.\n\nLot of creeps on this site.
585107
I don't think there's anything *bad* about loving anyone, but there are lots and lots of reasons not to get involved with someone that much older than you. In theory it shouldn't make any difference if you love someone, but it really does. The worst thing I think is that the *best* thing that can happen is that you (and your kids, if you adopt) will watch him get old and die. If you adopted today, he will be 80 when you are 50 and your kid is 30. I say stick with the guys your own age, and let him be a friend of the family, an honorary uncle perhaps. You can still feel love for him without being his partner.
668713
well, i'm only 13 yrs. old, and i'm kinda not married, but i don't see anything wrong with that either. unless you had kids with your ex, you should be fine.
642897
my husband has a child with his ex that is one month older than ours. IT IS HARD. but i love my stepson as much as i do my kids and i have always told my husband i would never come between him and his other son he even stays with him when he is sick and just got back from a week long trip with his ex wife and son it was for his son medical reason but i wouldnt have it any other way. Just becase he has a child already dosent mean yalls wont be as special this will be his child with YOU the woman he loves and that will make all the difference trust me and if you need anyone to talk to im here and know excatly what you are going thru just email or im me.
552172
Hi. Look this is a no win situation for you. I know as I've been there.The best thing to do is ask your man to join you no matter what the situation is. Your kids have to get use to the idea that your have a life and you are entitled to be able to get on with it just as they do. They don't ask your permission as to who they date and don't expect you to be in a mood because of it. My partner and i nearly ended up apart when we tried to please everyone. You have to think of you and your boyfriend as he will be there for you when you need him and they wont as they have there own life to get on with AS you have. Good Luck and Merry Christmas and a happy new year
371834
If possible try to remain a friend to him and his daughter.  But if you or he has an attraction for the other than leave it alone.  He is old enough to be your grandfather and as such you would have nothing in common socially, emotionally or any other way.  I'm certain that his daughter would not forgive you and your family would be very upset if you started a relationship with him.  Fact is you'd be a young widow and if you did ever have any children of your own he would never be able to do anything with the kid as it grew up and needed it's father to take it to games, theater or whatever.  Pass on this one and try and find someone much closer to your own age.
447751
Unfortunately this is the way it is when you date a man with children and he has custody. What else can he do, he must take care of the children. This would be a very difficult thing to deal with however, you are really going to have to take a serious look at the whole picture and be honest with yourself. Is this something you are willing to deal with. It will and must be a great deal of acceptance and understanding on your part. Good luck and God bless
610864
Funny I should run into this question as I was thinking the same thing about my own six year marriage.   I had just been able to get a job since our kids are at the age where they can go to headstart. I just turned around last night to look at him at his computer and blurted out the words..."will you go out on a date with me?"  He turned and gave me a weird look til he seen i was seriious.  We then proceeded to ask where the other would want to go and  when.  So three weeks from now we hve a babysitter planned for the day and we are going out to see a movie an out to eat and do whatever else we cn think of.  Good Luck.
226377
Definitly... DON'T RUSH THINGS... even though you are 30 ... get to know him more.... It will be a higher chance of a happier life. 4 months is WAY TO SHORT to plan a life with someone... :)\n\n-- I guess it all depends on how you raise your children, as to how they will view you. \n\nEveryone worries about being a good mother, but make sure you take some time to think about it. Make sure you decide together weather or not to have kids. \n\nThe worse thing to do is do something (a life altering thing at that) knowing you only wanted to please someone else. \n\nMake sure you are happy FIRST! Don't let another person decide for you. \n\n:) good luck
215328
I'm 18 and have a 12month old son and single to. Even though he's with his mom most of the week. i know what your are talking about. i think you just haven't meet the right guy yet.
60468
Well, from a legal stand point it is perfectly fine to be dating him. You do need to consider though, his experience in life vs your own. Chances are he has done a lot more living then you have. In the begining your age differences may not effect your relationship much, but in time he could become possesive and controlling and try to stop you from living your young carefree life. Wanting to settle down ect... I watched this happen to my sister, and before she knew what was happening she felt stuck, and had a baby, and he had her convinced that she was nothing without him, often using his experience in life against her youhful ways. She did finally get out, after a few years, but now she is a single mom trying to make a life for her and her child and this guy is still a thorn in her side and will be for the rest of her life since she shares a child with him. While you might be thinking this would never happen to me, once upon a time my sister thought the same thing. Be careful & good luck.