What should you talk about during Thanksgiving Dinner with the in-laws?
965750
Ask them questions about their parents, grandparents, their childhoods, and be very interested in everything they say.  Ask them for advice about a good place to buy tires or whatever.  If they have traveled, ask them about the places they visited, what they liked or didn't like, whether they would go back there again.  Ask them how they met.  DON'T talk about religion or politics or money. And don't criticize your spouse -- after all, they raised him/her and he/she is perfect.
620258
Go somewhere nice and not too loud.  This will give you an opportunity to talk.  Ask him about his family and interest and let him talk.
796087
I just finished our menu last night and besides every food you mentioned (which we will have) our family also requires:  pan gravy; sage dressing; a pineapple dressing that is more like a souffle; a butternut squash casserole made with sour cream, butter and onions; a fruit salad that is combined with a base of marshmallows, sour cream and coconut that has previously set for 24 hours so that they combine into a thick and stable sweet cream that won't turn into a liquid; pickles (dill and sweet); olives (black and green);  both pumpkin AND pecan pie plus a required cherry pie and pumpkin cake roll.  I will also have a tray of crudities and dip that guests can nibble on if they can't wait until dinner (which is usually around 1pm to accommodate those that must watch football.)\n\nI know it sounds like a lot (and it is) but then we ususally have a gathering of from 13 to 24.  Even with a 20-27 pound turkey we rarely have many leftovers which is rather upsetting because isn't the whole reason we have turkey on Thanksgiving is for the sandwiches we get to have the rest of the week?
825095
I'm hosting too.  Here's a list of what will be on the menu:\n\nTurkey\nStuffing\nMashed Potatoes\nGravy\nRolls\nCorn\nMy wife's famous baked broccoli/cauliflower casserole\nCandied yams (sweet potatoes)\nCranberry sauce\nPumpkin pie\nApple pie\n\nOK, so it's very traditional and pretty boring, but hey...it only comes once a year and my family likes the traditional dinner, so it works for us
915924
You can ask your fiance what she might like, or find a unique gift from your country that you would like to share with her. A nicely framed photo of yourself and her son, or a nicely framed photo of the three of you together, could be an excellent gift. Or if she's coming to see you, get a spa day out or something similar, that way the two of you will have a chance to go and do womanly things together and get to know each other better. Best of luck! It's very considerate to be thinking of things to do to make this a nice relationship, because so many people have problems getting along with their in-laws.
842658
Your mother in law is forgetting the meaning of THANKSgiving.\n\nDO NOT let your marriage be dragged into the mess.  If you ate with your MIL last year then YOU and YOUR husband should honor your sisters wish to have the whole family together.   Explain to dragon lady that this is the first time in years your family has been together and RE invite her to enjoy a day with NO work. \nI lived it the WRONG way for 23 years I spent holidays at my in laws because we are neighbors and my mother in law DEMANDS it.  My mom lived 3 hours away and my  household was used to the big family get together next door.  SO we ALWAYS went to the in laws...So MY mom had a 3 or 4 person Thanksgiving .  \nMy mom died in June and I wish I had spent more Holidays with her. \n\nIf YOUR mother in law lives near by,  and your husband sees her regularly~  Then let her whine about Thanksgiving.    She should NOT be allowed to manipulate YOUR life with YOUR husband.    Visit her for PIE at her home after dinner, but do NOT give in and eat there.\n\n\nSorry so long , but TRUST me... I lived it the wrong way for 23 years...
678161
Start with a movie.  Then you will have some conversation built in during dinner.\n\nBest question, tell me about you.
951518
I've been there! My husband has been deployed 2 of the last 3 thanksgivings/Christmases. \n\nThere are several options. You could volunteer. You could treat yourself to a movie (thanksgiving is actually a big day for theaters). \n\nAnother option would be to contact your husband's unit commander and ask if they are doing anything for the wives/families of the deployed. I know it is tradition in my husband's unit for the commander's family to open their doors to all singles/deployed family members/people who can't go home. That may be your best bet for a traditional Thanksgiving meal. \n\nHang in there. I know how tough this is. Thank you and your husband for giving to our country.
787445
Give respect and cook nicely to your in-law's taste.
1165204
Don't be too serious after all this is the dinner where you are supposed to relax, but show him how much you love him. And make sure you mention his fiance, how much you love her and how you welcome her into the family. Don't make the whole thing about your son, or she will fill like you don't want her around.
361136
Definitely dinner and a movie. Go to the movie first, then, if you don't have other things to talk about over dinner, you can discuss the movie to break the ice. And go to dinner someplace that stays open late, so that if the conversation really gets rolling, you can linger over your coffee and dessert.
966050
it's about time your sister in law is not the only one who decides how thanksgiving will go.  why should she be the one to decide, when she herself doesn't follow her own rules?? email, to me, doesn't seem the answer.  why not just call your sister in law and tell her that you just can't make the 12 o'clock time - it's just too rushed and let her know the time that is good for you.  if she puts up a fit, just tell her to begin the festivities without you and you'll join in when you get there.  as far as making something, don't wait for THEM to tell you what to make, tell your sister in law i'll be making (whatever you care to make) so make sure no one goes to the trouble of preparing this.  don't let her run your family life, when she doesn't seem to be able to run her own life.  grandma will understand, if she loves you, because, i'm sure at one point in her life she went through the same dilemma.  families don't change that much from generation to generation. make sure this sister in law doesn't ruin your holiday because that is what it seems she is trying to do.  family plans do not revolve around her.  good luck and make sure YOU enjoy thanksgiving.
863543
I'm Italian so we tweaked the traditional American Menu so here it is.................\nTURKEY (of course) now to make it interesting my mom de-bones her turkey & stuffs it with a more italian like stuffing of wild rice mushrooms & spinach. Its tender and delicious\n\nMASHED POTATOES this I make with roasted garlic & chives a must have\n\nSTUFFING this is more traditional not actually stuffed into the turkey. \n\nBROCCOLINNI which are a green italian vegetable, very good.\n\nGREEN BEANS another american tradition, but we put our own twist on it with garlic & olive oil, and best thing is these are fresh grown in our own garden!\n\nPASTA our table always has a pasta on it either with a sauce or in the form of a soup. This year we are making gnocci a very yummy potatoe based pasta with a roasted tomato sauce.\n\nCRANBERRY SALAD made with fresh cranberies, pineapple & nuts real good.\n\nSWEET POTATOES in the oven.\n\nPUMPKIN PIE, BLACK BOTTOM BANANA PIE, CHOCOLATE SILK PIE (something for everyone) tons of holiday cookies too!!\n\nCHESTNUTS after dinner & dessert we roast chestnuts and eat them this is a huge family tradition!\n\nThis is Thanksgiving Italian-American Style
704040
My goodness!  All those people and you're on bed rest?!?!?!\nLet everyone else bring the food, you can do potluck.\nI do have a story.  My nephew's wife was responsible one year for cooking the turkey.  She got up very early in the morning and put it on, fixed other things, then decided she would lay down for a while.  Well, of course she fell asleep, and when she woke up it was almost dinnertime.  The turkey had cooked to leather.  Luckily she is a quick thinker.  She borrowed leftover dark meat from a friend who had done her turkey the day before.  And she went to a restaurant in town and bought a cooked turkey breast.  She cut it up and stuck it on a platter together and came on to dinner at my sister's house.  Told them she had decided to carve it at home.  My mother bragged on how good and tender it was.  She didn't tell my sister (her mother-in-law) about it for years!\nSeriously, let the family help you.  They will understand.  So put your turkey in the oven (don't go to sleep and forget it, though!)\nLet the hubby straighten the house.  Let the others cook and bring a dish.  Then let them all clean up.  While they're at it, they can do the decorating while you supervise from the sofa!\nGood luck to you, and Happy Thanksgiving.
343651
I would start learning your husband's native language seriously. Show some respect by at least trying to learn his culture (by learning the language first). He will be so impressed by your willingness. Let alone your in-laws! And also, it is OKAY to remind (or tell) them occasionally to please translate the jokes in English. Or tell your husband that you like to get involved in the discussions and have him translate it for you once in awhile. \n\nAnd some insider, it is not that easy to have somebody speak in English (or whatever language you both share) every single time when English is not even their native language (this goes to the man. So appreciate him even more).
912134
Be sure you are dressed properly for the occasion - find out which restuarant and what their dress code is.  Make sure your clothes are clean and ironed and your hair is combed - I know this sounds very lame but it means ALOT do parents that you present well.  It really does help them get a good impression to base your relationship.  Be polite - shake hands with the man and the woman - if she puts her hand out first.  Rise when one of the females does at the table.  Seat your girlfriend when you get there and her mom too if it's feasible.  Pick up your fork to eat after they do.  Make sure to put the napkin in your lap once you are seated.  Don't do alot of physical contact with your girlfriend.  This is an important beginning.  You can hold her hand but not kiss her in front of them.  Not yet.  Ask them questions, too - about where they live, what your girlfriend was like as a child, vacations they have been on, etc.  Answer all their questions politely and honestly.  And if THEY should be unkind or rude - just go with it for your girlfriend's sake.  Shake hands again when you say good bye and walk them to their car so you can open the door for the mom.  Try not to be nervous.  I wish you alot of luck - and I must say I'm glad I don't have to go thru something like that again! :)  I knowit's not easy!
916281
My mother-in-law told my husband and I she was not doing Thanksgiving or Christmas this year because of money, because her diabetes is getting worse and because she is tired of her son eating and running.  She does not take into account that her son works at night and has to sleep during the day.  She fixes the meal according to her schedule only.  Since she told us she wasn't cooking, we made our own pans to invite my brother over, as he has no other family in the area except us.  My husband told his mother when she asked later if we ever made other plans.  He told her and she got ill.  She went off on him because her, her husband, and her mother  weren't invited over.  He tried to explain that the seating just isn't there and she said we'd have to make our own plans.  Now she is doing nothing but laying guilt trips on him and it's working...to a point.  She will never change.  Part of it is because she is selfish and needy, though perfectly capable.  She is also jealous because he doesn't spend as much time kissing her butt.   \n\nYou are not alone.  It will either blow over or it won't.  You and your husband need to come up with a plan for the holidays.  The one you have sounds like a good one.  Either alternate holidays each year at her house and your mother's, or do Thanksgiving at your mom's/Christmas at his mom's this year.  Next year swap out.