JOKE!! What are good conservative parenting tips?
956800
Yes. That was very clever. How about liberal parenting tips? Now young liberals have unprotected sex and get pregnant and have many abortions and remember to put a tree before the lives of fellow Americans and remember to be homosexual when you can. Don't forget to murder someone or sell drugs because prison won't hold you forever. Goodnight young Clinton and Gore and Kerry.
742225
First of all, as a Long Term Single Parent, let me give you a few hints:\n\n1.  Put the TV on a timer -- and Keep the control with you.  I used the Parental Controls built into my unit, and that was a way I LIMITED the amount of time that they had in front of the boob tube (and locked the Video Games in a Locking Cabinet -- I had the only key -- and once a week -- for an hour, they could choose which game to play -- but it had to be that they played together quietly -- after that .. the games went back into the cabinet).\n\nEach afternoon/evening is scheduled -- from the time they come home after school to bedtime.  I also made it clear that they would participate in certain activities -- like Scouting, an After School Program, and an Athletics Event/Program each season.  \n\nWhen they fought -- it was time out.  NOTHING -- no TV, no radio, no games, just do your homework or read a book -- and you had to be within sight of me while I was fixing the meal.\n\nEven small children can help with the chores -- list them out on a weekly schedule -- put the child's name next to a chore (and be sure to rotate them through all chores) and tell them you will check when they say they are finished -- and DO check -- and make them re-do if it is not the way that you know they can do it.\n\nHomework Time -- same time every day.  At least an hour to make sure that their homework is done -- and they would have to check off their assignments that were listed in their daily planners.\n\nIF fighting while out in public -- I would tell them and start walking to the Car right away.  We would NOT stay out and enjoy an activity or event IF they could NOT behave.  (and my children were disabled!)\n\nMake sure that you are WELL organized in the home.  Even the small children can put away their own clothes, or help you by learning how to fold laundry.\n\nSame with taking out the trash.  It is an easy job, and they can do it from an early age.
197341
I think emphasis should be put on the family as a unit, as a refuge from the world, with children it is always important for them to have this!\n\nImprovement should be placed on young mothers today...\nI have noticed so much, recently, in groups, and social activities in which my husband and I attend, that a lot of mothers have the mindset of their child merely being someone who hangs on them. I heard one mother relate her experience by saying that she couldn’t go buy shoes, and spend the amount of time she wanted, without running home to breastfeed her child. That she switched to formula for this very reason. So I think Improvement should be made in this aspect, as well as an overall improvement of the family household, that children are you, the best parts of you, and should be spoiled with love, caring, and self worth, rather than spoiling them with things, or over-disciplining them!\n\n\nSpeaking of discipline;\nI think that Eliminating the idea that spanking your child is wrong! BEATING your child is one thing, but even Robert Allen, who is a child physiologist for the state of Tennessee, suggests to spank a child, only for disciplinary reasons, and to stomp on the floor, so as to startle, rather than hurt the child. \n\nI think we should REFORM the ENTIRE way a family is managed! \nAfter spending time reading some of the questions on Yahoo! Answers, I am noticing SO many disturbing things;\nMothers asking for opinions on their 15 year old daughters getting breast enlargement, 17 year old GIRLS referring to their lives, and relationships they have had for FIVE years. 11 year old boys asking about sex, and fathers, wives, daughters, husbands, and sons asking about partners’ sexual behavior! THESE are the priorities of the world today. THESE are the PROBLEMS with the world today. Finding the answers to these questions are wrong, in the fact that they are asking the WRONG ones...\nA mother wanting to know if she should get her daughter breast implants should really be asking 'How do I help my daughter to gain self esteem?' The girls speaking of thier teen lives, should not be referring to children, and sex, but to school outings, and getting real life advice from her parents. The boys asking about girls, and attraction should be out in the sun, enjoying their days, and not being worried with things that go on at night! These are things that should not be consuming the minds of youngsters, and thier PARENTS should be the ones to answer them, when these questions do arise, but obviously that’s not the way it works in their households! These are things that children learn about far too soon as it is, and as mothers, fathers, husbands, wives, aunts, uncles, mentors, or friends, we should be reforming our family lives to focus on what is really important...OUR FAMILIES! \n\n\nThese are merely my thoughts, and I don’t mean to offend anyone by my statements!\n\n-Cin
214192
I'm done laughing.  After I sat and read all the posts with Liberals bashing Conservatives, and Conservatives bashing Liberals, all I have to say is YOU ALL OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES!!!!!  The whole sorry lot of you fighting with each other and playing the "pointing the finger" and "name-calling" games reminds me of a bunch of kindergerteners during recess.  Do ya'll need mommy to come out there and wipe your noses?  Grow up people, act like adults, and instead of pushing and shoving, and "mommy, he's looking at me funny" and "mommy, she's touching", learn to work together.  No wonder this country is going to 773H in a handbasket.  Ya'll can't sit down together and actually work out out a decent plan, because ya'll are too busy jostling for position as to "who has the better ideas".  No wonder all the other countries in the world hate us.  Ok, I'm getting out my pulpit now, hoping all you Conservatives and Liberals have been thoroughly chastised enough to at least PRETEND you are adults.
355940
Number one be consistent.  Demand that they are respectful, kind to others, tell the truth, and non-violent.  Put them in a time out chair when they do not listen or take away something that means a lot to them.  Don't letting something be all right one time and not all right the next.  Too many people confuse children this way. However, do not just focus on the negative.  Let your child know when he/she is doing well.  Children love compliments, and they love to make others proud.   If all else fails, call Super Nanny!
738120
Just what the heck are "loosers"?  Turn off the computer, open a spelling book (unless you intend on being on welfare your whole life, like a good liberal).  GOD HELP US!!!    LOL!!!\n\n\n                            ;-)        **wink wink**!!!        ;-)
455897
I read Heather Armstrong's blog, www.dooce.com. It's a site for anyone who has a slightly crude sense of humor and is interested parenting, work, religion, and other daily humor bits.  She's hilarious.
1058144
wtf hahahahaha this is so funny omg..haha i was cracking upp\nwow..funny...\n\nbut anyways...yea...u need to clean urself up little boy!! \nmy goodness!!\ngo get some Lime Away or somethin.. after that....scrub ur a** with a car sponge....\n\nok good luck with this kid.
180368
plz don't listen to the previous person forgive him. You do have to chose carefully as to who you go to though. It is equivalent to any counseling. It depends on you church and how they view the world. You don't  want any of the 2 extremes not too conservative and not too liberal. The media would have you think that christian counseling is wrong but so are shrinks. It all depends on how you are trying to raise your youth. It is as everything people perceive it all depends on what you want your child to learn.
1052117
Ask a family friend or relative to watch your kids over night. (or even hire someone!)\n\nTake a long hot bath. Light candles, use your favorite bubble bath, listen to soft music, and even read a book in the tub if you wish.\nThen get 12 hours of uninterrupted sleep! You'll be amazed at how revitalized you are.\n\nDo this periodically. You'll restore your sanity, I promise!
679710
HOW TO KEEP A FLAT TUMMY\n\nA little boy walks into his parents room to see his mom on top of his \ndad\nbouncing up and down.\nThe mom quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen, dress's\nquickly and goes to find him.\nThe son sees his mom and asks, "What were you and dad doing?"\nThe mother replies, "Well, your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I \nhave to\nget on top of it to help flatten it."\n"You're wasting your time." says the boy.\n"Why is that?" asked his mom, puzzled?\n"Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her\nknees and blows it right back up!"
390376
To get the stick out of their butt, lighten up, & dont take things so seriously!  Have a little fun & a few laughs!
926303
There's no easy way.  You just have to be straight and to the point.  There are no magic words that will make it easier on either of you.  Just make sure the kid are with grandparents or a trusted friend for the night so that they do not have to hear anything that is said.
722251
Therapy and Medications. Admit her into a phyc ward for a while. And I agree with the chanting of, "Jesus save my daughter". That's pretty funny. \n\nIf I were that kids mom, I'd give her ONLY what she NEEDS! Clothes to last a week. A blanket, pillow, and mattress. 1 towel,tooth and hairbrush, and she has to "check out" toiletries such as toilet paper, shampoo, conditioner, and soap. NO toys, posters. movies, games, t.v., phone. This is called "Tough Love", and is used often by many parents for kids who refuse to understand the concept of having respect for their authoritive figures/parents. My folks used it on me for 2 years. They even locked me up for that time period. I was better for it when I got out to be honest. It REALLY does work. I gained a way better concept of appreciation for what I received for free. I am 31 now, and I think I live a better life now than what I might have, had I not gotten that intervention.
730204
Do what I do to my 15 y.o., Get her in head lock and repeat " the power of christ compels you, the power of christ compels you" that always works for us. It will at least giv e ya'll a good laugh and the bitchin will stop for a few.
203847
My personal opinion (shared by many others, I know)... It all started with the book by the late Dr. Benjamin Spock. Children need to be corrected at times. Not brutally, but sometimes it requires corporal punishment... Spare the rod, spoil the child. Time-outs and other non-painful measures are seldom effective, memorable deterrents with younger children. Also, you cannot expect to get good results from poor action. Children are parked in front of the television. Have you seen what's on television? Our minds are like computers. Garbage in, Garbage out. Children also, are allowed to sass/ talk back to their parents like I've never seen. The parents don't even seem to notice! Often the parents are just old children at heart. And finally, no matter what some people wishfully think, kids need a daddy to be emotionally healthy. Children raised only by their Mom have a much worse time. This has been proven statistically.
425120
Chris Rock said it best. The one responsiblity in life for a parent is to keep your daughter off the pole. No clear high heels and no lap dances.\n\nBut i am sure you will insist on the opposite. the world loves doing the opposite of what i do.