why my husband hesitate to divorce me?
959158
This is tragic.\n\nI am very sorry for what has happened.\n\nI feel frankly that you probably should go back with your momma. Your husband is being silly and throwing away a good woman. Moving your life is hard and he didn't seem to realize that not everyone can just pack up and leave. You were sick as well, so how dare he?\n\nIsn't he supposed to respect and love you? You have held your end of the bargan. He has failed with his. I would definatly move back with momma and divorce him. If he isn't willing to work it out and cheats...there really is little hope.
913767
For an arranged marriage, it's understandable how there can be some conflict arising from the circumstances but...Refuse! You have to stop for a second and think about your husband's desires.  It is important for you to show respect towards yourself and not do just anything he tells you to.  Express to him your discomfort, and if he as loving as he seems to be, he will get your point.  He also should take down that site and respect your privacy, especially since he never asked for your consent. \n\nIf he isn't willing to do that...then get a divorce if possible and move on.
242753
My advice to you:\nAll you have to do hun, stay truthful, honest, and love your man. And hopefully he does the same for the rest of your lives. There are no precautions you can take to avoid divorce. Fate brought you 2 together, and your fate lies with you 2. Let it take its course. If youre unsure of this marriage, do you think you should or are ready to get married? Make sure that you guys are 100% ready for this. Get some pre-marriage couseling if you'd like. Like meeting w/ your pastors. Usually that is the first step b/4 getting married anyway. You cant avoid the unavoidable. If its meant to be, it'll last, if its not, it wont. But best wishes to you. And a lifetime of happiness and love!!
386154
Have you talked to him about reconciliation through some type of therapy through your church. I have been divorced, and would have preferred reconciliation, but never even talked about it to my ex-wife. She pursued the divorce at first, and I never fought at all, what a mistake. He might have lost that loving feeling, but that is part of life. It will return, given time. and it will be better than before.
1125347
It sounds to me like a little boy asking for mommy's permission to be bad ... that way he has all the pleasure of playing with matches, but evades the responsibility.\n\nGuy's have this way of being real cowards about ending a relationship. Instead they push their wife ... and push and push and push until she is backed into a corner with no option BUT to say "I've had it -- no more!" and then ... they go around saying "Well, SHE wanted a divorce." Once again, a little boy evading responsiblity.\n\nIf you want to keep this marriage, get some counselling. He needs to hear an outsider tell him he's being a jerk and not just you. If you'd just as soon be free to find a man who will honor and cherish you, then call his bluff. Tell him no way is a third person joining you in your marriage bed and when is initiating that divorce and moving out?
221000
It depends: do you have faith in him? You need to consider what happened with your last relationship. Was it something he did? Was it something you did? Try to figure that out first. That way, if you do choose to start over, you can fix it.\n\nNext, decide if your relationship can be salvaged at all at this point. Has too much gone wrong between you? If so, then make a clean break. Or can you be together without getting too awkward? Do you think there's too much pain, or do you think you can be together without having what went wrong throbbing in your heart each day? If so, then you may be able to save your relationship.\n\nAnd finally, do you want to start over as friends? So far, your husband's intentions and attempt seem genuine; it seems that he really wants to save your relationship by going back to the beginning and fixing the things that went wrong the first time around. Are you willing to go back to square one? And are you ready for if it doesn't work out?\n\nIf you choose to do this, then I think he's right when he says to take it slow. It would be hard, and expecting everything to fix itself quickly would make it harder; it's expecting too much. Chances are, it might even take longer than the first time around because last time, there wasn't the awkwardness or discomfort of a marriage gone down. It's risky, and it won't be easy.\n\nWhatever you choose, good luck and I wish you the very best.
171382
If he is otherwise a good husband but just has problems with money, you can still fix this.  I would advise you to seek marriage counseling.  In the meantime, take control of all of the bills.  Contact a debt consolidator to help you pay off your bills quicker.  He may feel inadequite but help him to understand that some people just are not good with money.  \nI am in the same situation but I stopped it before it got out of hand.  My husband literally gets an allowance every week and when it's gone, it's gone.  I have taken over the bills and they are now getting paid on time.  We got both of our credit reports to see what all we needed to pay off and little by little it is disappearing.  \nIt took awhile to get in the hole that you are in so it will take ahwile to get out.  \nDefinately seek counseling to try to work things out.  Money shouldn't be the reason for divorce.
678904
Breaks are ok like this, logical and smart.  He's being very mature.  You not going to like how I say this, and I honesty don't know a better wait, so i'm sorry in advance.  But this is your warning from him if I'm reading what you wrote right, your behavor isn't acceptible to him and he's not going to put up with it.  If you can't control it, you might want to move on, save yourself the divorce later.  Hope you don't, sounds like you lucked up and got yourself a good guy.  Alot of girls would love to be in your shoe's.  Don't blow it.
564189
He's prob not afraid at all...If you just bought a house, then it could be for financial reasons...Also, what about his parents..I find alot of people who come from divorced families are a bit nervous about tying the knot themselves! I say he'll ask....You just have to be patient!!!
376044
I hope that you are very careful with what you are doing with this guy.  Remember that you are married and you may lack a certain thing in your marriage which will be better work out with your husband.  I understand that it is kind of nice to have someone interested in your despite you are married but why are you dragging him on?  Will you be happy to divorce your husband because this guy sweet talk to you?  Are you sure that you will have a better future with this man than your current husband.  I suggest that you spend more time with your husband and rediscover him then talking to this guy, unless you have no hope in your marriage!  Good Luck!
219031
I think you are hesitant to leave because you are comfortable in your marriage lifestyle.  You're used to your typical everyday routine: going to work, taking care of your child, etc. etc.  Honestly, I don't think he is right for you at all.  For him to talk badly about you behind your back regardless of what it is about means he doesn't respect you.  How could you love someone you don't respect.  The things he does - just leaves and doesn't come home or tell you to get out of HIS house - that's just bull crap.  It's hard when you don't have any family around or someone to go to if you should leave.  But you know what - you have a great education and an awesome job and you can make it.  Be thankful that you are not just a housewife with no education or job experience ... and can't leave the man because you have no where to go and can't support yourself most especially.  You don't need to depend on him for support. You should leave! Good thing you didn't let yourself go either - you workout you're attractive have a good job / education ....why do you put up with this - I guarantee you that you would enjoy your life much more without him and being treated how you deserve.  Maybe a trial seperation would be good or some cousneling something . but .. if it doesnt work out then at least you'll know that you gave it our all and wont have any regrets aobut it.  Honestly, I don't think you should deal with this - it will get worse I think.  You deserve better - it's hard to find a good woman with all your qualities - get rid of him girl. You don't sound happy.
682687
Sounds like he doesn't want you, but he doesn't want anyone else to get close enough to want you either. He wants to keep you reeled in just close enough to give him freedom, but to keep you from gaining any. Cut him loose, sweetie. Be the very best mommy you can be to your children, because they are also going to suffer a loss here. They are going to be sensing a void in their lives that you will have to fill. Don't take any calls from him unless it involves the children or the divorce. Do not talk about what could've been or what should've been. IF HE WANTS YOU BACK BAD ENOUGH, HE WON'T TALK ABOUT IT, HE WILL DO ALL HE CAN TO SHOW YOU! Do not fall for empty promises or the all-famous, "I need a little space" or "I need a little time to think about it." First, concentrate on your kids; your security and confidence will soon grow around you and stand you up on your two feet. Eventually, you will wonder why you wasted the time you did on waiting for him. Give yourself 1 year to recover...it's only 365 days. No big deal. Good luck!
5420
I did a similiar thing (except he wasn't married) and now my husband is divorcing me. It's probably a sign your marriage is lacking and whatever benefits you are receiving from the other guy (companionship, attention, etc) is making for this. Talk to your husband, be honest about how you feel and try counseling. Good luck.
624442
I'd hesitate for a little bit. Why? Because my true love as of right now, is not ready to settle, so I'd have to find out why he had a change of heart?
809905
Sounds like you need space for yourself. Dump the husband since he isn't working with the reconciliation. Then give your self space. Don't let this other guy enter your life too quickly, sounds like he did just that when you were separated. When you are stable from the finalized divorce, then look at your prospects.
165928
Wait and see how things go after your divorce is final.. He may fear reprocusions from a jealous husband.  Also are you sure that a committed relationship is really what you want.  After all, you are just getting out of a committed relationship.  Maybe you should give yourself some time to be free and single and then take another look at your feeling towards this man friend.\n\nGood luck to you in all you do..
663444
Divorce can be the solution \nbut are u sure that u don't love u husband and  do u have children ?... because children will suffer in all that