This NOT that typical! I seriously want some advice! Death in the family!!?
955101
Well here's an idea don't act so enwrapped to the relationshiop with him.  HIS DAD JSUT DIED you want to show you like him so show some comapssion towards the expired body.  You want to start talkin to him Start like this:\nHey i heard what happened to your father are you alright?\nHim: yea im getting over it.\nyou: wanna discuss it? \nHim: no i dont\nyou: well you should be at peace before you go on. What was he like? \nthen he'll tell you or cry i dunno \nthis only workd if you dont know his father otherwise itll seem obnoxious.
757053
aww that is not good! You guys are sibs! Y'all need to love and respect each other and remember, it is the Holidays and God loves you and wants y'all to show your love for each other.  You know deep down you love him no matter how big of a little twirp he may be ;).  Don't ever wish he would die, you know how many people will be without loved ones this year because of horrible accidents, diseases/illnesses, or other reasons.  Just be lucky to be with your family and feel blessed! God has blessed you and may he continue to do so! :)\n\n<3 Happy Thanksgiving!!! :)
159858
you know what is best for you. your mother might be a pain in the a** how ever she just lost some one close to her and she needs you and your family more than you know. for now think of her for a little while then you can do what is best for you. even though we all know how mother in laws can be you can do it hang in there heath.
342548
That's a tough situation and I'm so sorry for your loss. You should definitely talk openly about this with other family members and friends. You should also consider seeing your doctor for depression. Since you can't bring your mom back, try to focus on how to celebrate her. Put together a memorial with her pictures, hobbies and guest speakers. Did she have any dreams? Live out some of her fantasies for her. Feel her passion and feel her spirit inside you. The mourning period needs some closure so you can move on with your life. Try talking with more people like teachers, counselors, and even strangers. Cry a lot. Also...go ahead and talk to your mom. Ask her for advice and let your heart guide you. But don't ever give up!
512535
You both are young. The death of a loved one at any age is hard. All the other answers says it all. You can't cheer her up. Nothing will at this time. You didn't say if she believed in God. But that is what is helping me right now.It was her Mom's time. It's sad that she had to go via car wreck. Let her cry. Here are some ideas that I have done and will do myself(I lost my 82 year old Mama in March this year). I planted a small flower garden in her memory. Nothing big or elaborate. My Mama loved flowers any and all. Her b-day is in a week. We still plan on having her a party.I'm getting helium balloons and we are going to write her a special message and let them go. We realize she won't get them, but hey-Who knows?? Just be there when she needs a shoulder to cry on. Let her remember her Mom. Remind her of something funny her Mom did. Don't let her dwell on the bad times that all mothers and daughters have. I can tell you; us Moms wouldn't want our children to remember those times. Sit down with her if she wants to look at pictures of her and her Mom in happier times. Some people will tell her thats the wrong thing to do. Maybe-Maybe not. God will help her.Have her read scriptures in the Bibles that will encourage her.Just be her friend.Her Mom is just a memory away.I'll be praying for you and her.You will have a rough road being her friend, her pain is yours. God Bless you for wanting to help her.
354042
take a laugh at life and realise how lucky u r.do u have a all your faculties about you?have all your limbs?get at least one meal a day?is your house being bombed?do you hae access to the internet?things are never so bad if you look at the bigger picture.you will be fine....wait 20 mins,you might feel better than now.laugh at this joke:why do they bury mother in laws 18ft down......cause deep down they really are nice people!!!chin up,you are loved by somebody out there!!!
322162
Keep talking to your brother,he seems to be the only person in your family acting like a grown-up!You are entitled to your beliefs and he is your brother,losing him would be like losing an arm,so keepthe lines of communication open and hopefully your parents and sister will come round,good luck,stay strong.
136626
Although divorced now, when I was married we just had our first child. Shortly thereafter, my father-in-law was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He stuck it out with us for two years. As his time approached, everyone knew and my wife (at the time) gathered with her brother and mother at his bedside. I stayed home with our son. That night at about 11:30 he passed. About 1:00 am that morning, I awoke to hear our little son talking in his room. This went on for about 20 minutes. Then quiet. I fell back to sleep, and upon awakening in the morning went to get my son. When I did, I asked him about his talking last night. He said yes, he was talking to Pa pa. I cringed and said what! He repeated, he was talking to Papa. I said where was Papa. He pointed to the window in his room! I was in a cold sweat, and didn’t know what to say!\nSuffices to say, from that point on, I believe there is more death than we can know!\nThis is a true event!
608044
How close is he to his Dad? My Dad died six months ago, and I find out when my brother called me. \n\nI don't think that you should wake him up. Let him get a good night's rest for tonight, because he probably won't have another for weeks.\n\nI'd really have to know the situation to know how to word this, but I suggest that you be honest. Your son will feel that he has been cheated in some way, and you do not want to add to that by deceiving him in any way. \n\nI know it's hard, but you really have to just tell him, and you are going to have a really hard time ahead of both of you. You also should have him go to the funeral, and encourage him to if he's scared. He will only have one chance to do this, and if he doesn't, he may regret it the rest of his life. Don't force it, but let him know that you don't want him to miss saying goodbye if he feels he needs to. I had to do this... I had to see my father dead, because I never would have believed it otherwise - and I'm 26, not 11.\n\nSome things you can tell him is that there are things that death can't take away. Death cannot take away the love that was between him and his father. Death cannot take away the memories he has. Once the situation settles a little and the first bit of shock is gone, find ways to remember his father - help him burn a CD that reminds him of his Dad. Make a scrapbook with him. Make a book for him with your memories of his Dad (the good ones). Find creative outlets for his emotions. Let him get angry, let him cry, and make sure that he maintains himself. \n\nPlease, please, please, concentrate on the good things about his Dad, and stay away from the bad things. My mom is still talking about all the things my Dad did wrong, and I could just strangle her. If you do this, he will see you as insecure and will turn his anger toward you. \n\nDo not accept at any point that he is over it. If you do, you may end up with a cery angry teen that starts to act out in a few years. Don't hound him, but every now and then, initiate a conversation about it and make sure he knows that you are there. \n\nEducate yourself about the grieving process and about depression and suicide warning signs. If your son appears to have a problem that goes beyond normal grieving, get him to a counselor. \n\nMy best wishes to you and your son. May his Dad watch over both of you.
1177393
Lexy,\nI am deeply sorry for your loss, however, remember you son is now in a better place and is watching over his mother.  Read Sylvia Brown's "Life on the Other Side".  I have had too many close experiences with death and this has really helped me understand what is to happen next.  Our bodies will terminate, however we will not.\n\nNate
643130
Life is full of "what if's". We can not change yesterday, tomarrow is all we have and there will be more "what if's". Look at it this way, IF you were meant to be with M then it would have happened while you where single, not married... \nThis is your unanswered prayer and your are to wrapped up in "you" - being self center to see the bigger picture. For the simple fact that you owe J more respect than you are showing him, remove the blindfold from over your eyes, wake up & smell the coffee, child it is time you act like an adult. Grow up! Your not the first and wont be the last to miss one hih school crush. Even my 87 yr old aunt said she missed hers and wondered "what if". But at the age of 89 she died in the arms of a good man who loved her and still did for 75 yrs. Two weeks before she died they celebrated 73 yrs of marriage. Can you do that?
602617
Oh, sweet Katelyn, I am so sorry for you and your sweet nephew! What a tragedy. You are being very brave. Have you discussed taking care of him with your parents? Even if you were to be his primary caregiver they would have to be involved. I know that you are still grieving, but have you thought about how you will finish school if you have the care of a baby? Really, honey, you need to discuss this with your parents. Ask your pastor if there are people at church who could help out. Maybe someone would provide child care during the day while you are at school. You must be a very mature 15 year old to be thinking of this in the midst of your grief. Your sister would be so proud of you. Talk to your parents. I'm sure they'll have some ideas. God bless all of you!
738386
You need to just call him and tell him that you know that you've made mistakes, but you really miss your mom and you really want to be a part of your sister and brother's lives, if he'll give you that chance. Explain that they are your only connection to you mom and though you weren't there during her death you want to be able to remember her with the people you love. I know the way I said it isn't how it happened but he's going to be much more likely to believe you and let you spend time with your family if you go along with his side of the story. Just talk to him and ask if you could maybe take your siblings out to lunch and talk to them about their lives and your mom because you really need to reconnect with them. Just be humble with him and honest about your feelings. I know what it's like to be completely disconnected from your family and then to try to reconnect after a tragedy and it's hard. People tend to think that you're being fake and you'll leave right after the tragedy is averted. Make it clear to your step-dad that you are there to stay and you want to be a part of their lives.
674970
I’m really sorry for your loss.\n\nYour experience is very normal, and I’ve heard as much from other people, especially if they had a good steady relationship with the parent who died. My grandfather died recently (he was in his 90's), and my mother is going through the same thing, even though she was prepared for it.\n\nEven deep friendships have the same sort of “resonance.” One author wrote about his best friend dying in an unexpected accident and said that every time he saw a white SUV of the same model as his friend’s sitting in a parking lot or passing him on the road, he had to fight the urge to pull over or turn around and look for him. His head knew that his friend was gone and not coming back, but his heart kept hoping anyway. \n\nThere are so many cues around us that we associate with someone we care about, and even when they are not there, we are still cued to respond.\n\nI know it’s distressful, but unless you are doing some dangerous things because of the feelings or find yourself unable to function on a daily basis, I would just say you’re very normal. \n\nLook at it as a clear indication of how much you loved your father and what a good relationship you two had together: Even though he has died, his presence still seems very real to you. \n\nHe is in a sense “always with you.” \n\nThat’s actually something special -- it's an experience that some people never have with their parents or anyone else. In a way, although you are suffering his loss, you are still very blessed.
120618
I think he will be very sorry one day!\nMy aunt and her son went through the same kinda thing \nand he died about a year ago from cancer.\nOf course his mother would have been there for him all the\ntime, but his sick wife wouldn't allow it!\nI say please try to keep your family together cause one day we will all need each other in one way or another!\nI wish you the best of luck with your son & i will be praying for you!
866656
Shoes, you know you are asking for something really impossible - to stay the way you were, always, through out your life, without any change. We all grow, I mean mentally, and along the way we lose a lot of people all at once, or at different stages of our life. It is so sad to remember how we were when all these people were actually present in our lives, and it is so difficult to imagine how it would be without them. I cannot. But then I have to come in terms with it, because death specially is the ultimate truth. You father, ofcourse meant a lot to you, and this is the phase where you are dealing with his loss. It is natural. For you to be funny and friendly will be a very abnormal thing to do. Take it as it comes. Cry if you want to, let things out of you, and start thinking '''now what ?''. You have to start again, this time your dad is not there, but I am sure your dad would not want you grieving all your life. Dont you think ? He would be really really upset to see you this way. Your girl left you ? What are the reasons ? Could it be that you are really going through a difficult phase in life, and perhaps she could not stand with you through this ? Whatever, she may have had her reasons, and then you cannot force anyone, can you ? You can still be funny and freindly, may be not the same as you were before, but by allowing time to heal you, getting yourself to keep going, do things that you are supposed to be doing, like work / study, be with people, do something new, go to a new place for a change, ...Chart out things in your life, in terms of career, your long term goals....keep your mind thinking ''what next'', instead of wallowing yourself in self pity....its absolutely normal for that dark cloud to exist in your mind, but you have to bring in the sunshine yourself, make efforts to, and this phase will pass too. This dark cloud will not stay forever in your mind, can you picture yourself like this when your 40 - 50 ?? I dont think so....so while time does the trick, start new today. Get up, and get going. You will meet someone who is really special, so dont waste time thinking of someone who left you at the lowest low of your life...\n\ngood luck\n\nP.S. Feeling greif is normal, and do not confuse it with the actual ''depression'' where you have to resort to medicines, and I am sure you would consult a professional, who will really decide if you do have depression
187933
Well first of all let me say I am sorry about the death in your family.\n   If I were in a situation like yours, what I would do is make a photo album of all her pictures and everything that was apart of her life. Or I would plant a bush of her favorite flowers. \n   I hope this helps!!!\nGood luck to ya!