Why do people who have kids subject people to this....Warning very Mentally Damaging?
966056
Because of man's biological nature is to mate with as many women as possible and women's is to find a man to stick around the baby tends to be the changing factor. I have heard the argument that babies have symmetrical faces that are design for the man to see the baby as cute and stay to protect his passed on genes. The universal traits that have always been considered attractive are most of which babies have such as; big eyes, small nose, and a round face. These are the same features men have always found attractive in females. We tend to be attracted to people who look like us, and who looks more like you then your own child. You always hear parents say, "Oh, he's got my nose, or eyes, or whatever." So, maybe you are finding other babies ugly cuz they are not your own. People feel good when they are needed. A babies helplessness is what helps tie the bond between parent and child.\n\nBesides all that I agree with you, I do not plan on ever having kids.\nXXX porn on a plan? Come on man, you don't want some nasty guy masturbating next to you.
26425
kids will be kids.\n\nSome people get a thrill out of making life miserable for other people.  It's a power thing.  Just like you wanting to "strike back".\n\nDon't contribute to the problem.  Instead, spend your energy on getting something to prevent you from being booted.
33696
Often, people who abuse have been abused themselves. They've learned a distorted pattern of relating to others, and they pass it on. Also, often they have not learned to handle anger well, and so they take it out on their children.
40549
It's quite true that there are just some things that we have to learn for ourselves. \n\nIt's also true that other people have different perspectives, goals and desires than we do.  Sometimes it's a matter that we are missing something that they see.\n\nIt can be frustrating when you see your own child make a mistake, but you can't protect them, and it is VERY tricky to convey to them what you have learned or what you see that you think they don't see.\n\nSo here is my advice: (!)\n1.  Give up your need to have them follow your advice.  They have to be able to do differently than what you advise, or you are just trying to control them, not help them.  And like I said above, what you want may not be what they want.  And they aren't there to do right everything you did wrong.\n\n2. Learn active listening - see link below.
150826
I believe the reason no one else has answered is the same as my reason, but I figured I may as well tell you.  I do not like to answer questions that expect me to "hit the blue line" before I do.  I have been burned by viruses (virii?) too many times, and too many times simply found that the next thing wanted was my contact information.  Then spam comes spewing out my email inbox like the owl post to Harry Potter in the first movie!\n\nI love kids, and hate to think of them being abused, but I know that such a tear-jerker cause can be exploited shamelessly by people who are far more interested in their own agenda.  I do not want to fall victim to those types anymore than I want kids to fall victim to any abuser.\n\nThere are also sensitive issues about false claims of abuse during heated divorce cases, people who consider the term "child abuse" a convenient buzz word every time a parent disciplines a child, however mildly, etc.  There are people who would force parents to surrender their rights to their children to "security," as our federal government has asked us to surrender our right to privacy to "security."  There are people who would shut down a day-care center on charges of abuse, when what they really want is to gain control over the children themselves.\n\nIt's a mean, mean world out there, and I hope you are sincere.  I'm not convinced this is the way to go about what you are trying to do (I hope) to help the kids themselves.
565769
I think they are because they wanted to do stuffs in their own way because when they were a kid they cant do ir so they want kids to be good but they don't show themselves as a good model so they are basically hypocrites.. If im gonna be a parent someday I'd be the best parent so the generation/tradition/culture of being a hypocrite will stop. and oh yea stupidity has also something to do with it.
1058292
I totally agree with your answer. I work in a children's hospital and you wouldn't believe how many people hurt their children. It makes me so sick to see kids in pain. If I had the chance, I'd beat the crap outta these parents that don't care about their children. Every child is a gift. Some people just don't get it. They should all be wiped off the face of the earth for hurting a child. Ok, I fell better now. Thanks for the chance to vent! :0)
721069
with all that you hear these days, it sounds like an emotional problem to me. those kids need help, as much as she loves her children i think it is also a form of abuse, she is just ignorant to it, and uneducated. someone speak up to her for the kids sake.
106737
I think that it's a normal thing. You are attached to them, and it's perfectly fine to feel sad. Whoever says you're not normal apparently doesn't have kids or grandchildren...and if they do, well, they are sad for thinking it's wrong.
214057
Because that is reality.  Kids are cruel little beasts, especially to those that are different from them.
1052013
dude thats a horrible thing a parent could tell their child....id be pretty pissed, hurt, and confused...
508718
Nope, you're not wrong at all.  because people don't want to accept any responsibility for their issues.  They refuse to look at why they may want kids despite the fact that they are dysfunctional.  Dysfunction comes in many different forms, it comes in needing validation from others, not being financially sound to raise a family and doing so anyway, it comes in trapping a man with pregnancy due to their fear of being alone, it comes in living with cultural boundaries and traditions that aren't condusive to proper emotional, mental, physical and spiritual development, it comes in their paranoia of being judged by society or friends, culture or family, it comes in trying to resolve their own childhood dysfunctions with their own parents by controlling a vulnerable human being that they brought into the world, it comes in feeling insecure and thinking that someone needing them will heal them.   I could go on.   All of this is basic responsibility and it's amazing how much people avoid it.  Why?  because they place their own unhealthy needs onto others instead of doing the work themselves.  Sad really and it's our downfall of society.  If you can't raise a healthy child then you've just brought another dysfunctional person into the world who will grow up to do yet the exact same thing and the saga continues through generations and generations and generations and generations.
315124
I blame the parents. They need to crack the yardstick. I got my rear smacked a few times and it made me be a better parent to my kids cause I didn't turn out to be some spoiled snot that thought I should be able to get away with everything. The T.V. and the web has plenty of filth that the kids have access to while Mom's at the career.Sorry, but if you plan a family I feel one parent should stay home and raise them and if you can't afford kids don't have them until you can or don't have more than one !
548157
because the trend is to believe in biological psychiatry and to see defects in people that need to be adjusted chemically. Because they dont see those children as persons that are growing and alive and whatever. Because it's just stupid, I can't say it otherwise...
214272
I agree. To me they are even scarier than rapists and murderers. That might sound extreme, but anyone who has children can probably relate to that sick feeling in their stomach they get when thinking about what sick things pedophiles out there are doing to children.
165761
Some of these people really don't have your best interests at heart, telling you to run away, yell, demand, cry. That doesn't get you what you want, and it doesn't help you learn how to deal with the real world, who don't really care if you're having a bad day or not. Not knowing you or your parents, I can only speak from my years of experience, raising my two kids to adulthood (with NO bloodshed!). When my teenaged daughter yelled at me, it did not make me want to give in or get all warm & fuzzy. It made me clamp down and cut her off, sending her to her room, often with a lot less than before (like being grounded for sassing). The best way to deal with parents who have clamped down on you is to find out why they are holding you back. Do they have a reason for not trusting you? Have you done something to make them clamp down on your freedom? If you're too young and you want to do things that only older kids are doing, they are trying to protect you from what could be a very bad situation. They have experience, that's what makes them know what to do. No, parents aren't perfect. We have screwed up lots of times. But, we remember what it was like to be your age, and all the feelings that go with it. That hasn't changed over the years. Feelings are still feelings, no matter how long ago we were kids. When you become a parent, you want to protect your kid from all the nasties that are out there, especially other kids who we have NO control over. We don't know what kind of morals other kids have been raised with, or even IF they have any morals. So, us parents have the tendancy to hold you kids just a little too much sometimes. Even though we know that we have to gradually give you your freedom, the process is sometimes painful for us to see, especially when we see you act in a way that brings too many memories back for us. It's like watching a train wreck. You know what's gonna happen if you don't warn someone to throw the switch on the track, but sometimes the wreck has to happen to fix a bigger problem. That's why some parents let their kids get thrown in jail, even though everything inside them wants to just hold them close and save them from harm. It's better that they learn some hard lessons before things get really bad. So, it really bites, being a parent sometimes. Try to think of what your parents have to put up with. Maybe changing places with them for a day will help you see what they have to put up with on a daily basis. It's not just off to work, then come home and put your feet up & yell at the kids for not getting their chores done. It's more than that. Many kids say they can't wait till they get to be 18 and free. Guess what? With freedom comes RESPONSIBILITY. You are then responsible for EVERYTHING you do & say. One person said it very well...enjoy being a kid for as long as you can. You're getting your eats, heats and everything else for nothing. Out in the real world, when you need a dentist, you have to pay boo-coo bucks just to pull your tooth out, let alone get a filling. Same thing for when you get sick. Just one antibiotic pill can cost over $10.00 and you'll need on the average of 10 pills to get better. And that doesn't even add in the cost of seeing the doctor, which is $60.00, where I live. What I would suggest, little one, is learn to listen a little more, learn to help a little more, and after a while they just might loosen their hold on you. When they can see that you're showing signs of growing up and taking responsibility, they'll give you more freedom. But, don't blow it by taking advantage of their trust. Once you have it, losing it would take you that much longer to get it back. Also, if you ask them how you can help a little more around the house, it would make a big impact on how they treat you in the future. When all you give them is attitude, that's all you'll get back, along with a very lim
883509
I'd start out by saying something like people need to take responsibility for their actions and continuing to point a finger isn't going to fix anything.  It might be hard to admit that their kids did something bad cause then it might mean that they aren't being very good parents.  Pointing a finger of blame may be the easiest way for them to not admit they aren't doing a good enough of job.