does having a bad father determine the type of men you chose as an adult??
971324
No, I believe this to be a fallacy
263629
I can't tell, but I'll assume you are a female. Many times a young woman that either has had a bad relationship with a father or significant male figure at an early age ( between 2 and 10 years old) will be attracted to men that are similar in characteristics. They attempt to change the person in an attempt to fill a void in their past. If you think this may sound like you, I'd suggest you get some counseling to deal with the real source of the problem, which is from your childhood.\n\nTry finding a church or christian counselor if you can. Some will charge  based on what you can afford. Take this seriously. It could mean becoming healed and whole, or a lifetime of heartache!
668878
i think my dad is great.  he has the unconditional love thing down.  he sacrificed to give his kids all he could, and went without many times.  i almost lost him 4 years ago, and all i have to say i do as much and as often as i can.  mostly i say thank you and i love you!
206075
BLUF: A lot of homosexuals do have bad relationships with there fathers, but I would not venture to say all!\n\nFYI: “While worldly fathers are so afraid to hug, kiss and cuddle their sons for fear they turn him into a sissy. The opposite is in fact true! Fathers in the world worry about their sons becoming homosexual and emotionally withdraw and become tough and macho with their sons. This will actually make your children more likely to turn into homosexuals! \nAs the Doc says: "A former homosexual who has carried on an effective ministry for five years among homosexuals reported, 'I have counseled over three hundred homosexuals and have yet to find one that enjoyed a warm love relationship with his father.'" \nInadequate Parental Relationships \nParents are easily the most important external force in the life of any child and, as would be suspected, contribute largely to the homosexual or heterosexual predisposition of their children. A professor of psychiatry at one of the nation's leading medical schools stated, "Current research indicates that the family most likely to produce a homosexual comprises a very intimate, possessive and dominating mother and a detached, hostile father. Many mothers of lesbians tend to be hostile and competitive with their daughters. The fathers of female homosexuals seldom appear to play a dominant role in the family and have considerable difficulty being openly affectionate with their daughters." \nMost of the new books on homosexuality contain the report by Dr. Irving Bieber, who studied the family backgrounds of 106 male homosexuals. According to his discoveries, eighty-one mothers were dominating, sixty-two were overprotective, sixty-six made the homosexual their favorite child, eighty-two of the fathers spent very little time with their sons, and seventy-nine maintained a detached attitude toward them.22 \nAs important as the father is in the life of a child, even he must take second place to mother during the first three years of life. she feeds the baby at her breast and spends far more time with him in infancy than does his dad. Consequently, mothers actually have more to do with producing a predisposition toward homosexuality than fathers. Two kinds of mothers are particularly harmful-smother mothers and dominating mothers. \nSmother Mothers \nEvery child needs love, but few things are worse than an overprotective, smothering affection that is showered on an infant, not for his benefit but for the mother's. Many a love-starved young mother satisfies her love hunger on her child until he is the primary object in her life. The more she bestows her affection, time, and attention on her child, the more she neglects her husband. This may turn him further from her and the child, compounding the problem.\nDr. Howard Hendricks used to say in Family Seminars which he and I held together that ' ' whenever a mother makes her son number one in her life, she begins to raise a pervert. " In other words, it is normal for a boy to be number two in the heart of his mother, for he doesn't feel threatened when he knows father is number one. But when mother and father cannot preserve a love relationship and she makes the child number one, he is in trouble. He may begin to identify with her, take an interest in feminine things, and develop effeminate mannerisms. Such concerns start early in life and are very difficult to break. One veteran homosexual in the counseling room complained that his mother was "overprotective and smothering.'' He illustrated the latter by saying, "She never hesitated to embarrass me. she thought nothing of unzipping my pants to tuck in my shirt. Between that and wiping my nose, she was all over me.'' \nThroughout history, researchers have repeatedly verified that homosexuals are ''mama's boys" whose mothers doted on them in their youth. Tchaikovsky, Michelangelo, and Freud are notabl
855756
Wow...I'm so sorry that your father is acting this way towards you. Since your an adult now, you have a choice to make. Cursing him out, no matter how satisfying that may be, really isn't going to help out your situation. If anything, all it will do, in his little brain,is prove him right. Hopefully your not living with him still. Because you need to on your own if at all possible, to put some distance between the both of you. It's so unfortunate that as someones child, YOU have to act as the 'mature-responsible-adult'. You have to be the one to set the example that his behavior is unacceptable, and your not going to stoop to his very lowly level and reflect what he is doing to you. He sounds like a very bitter man, and again I feel for you and your situation. If your able to find a good counselor to talk to, that may be of great benefit to you to help you work through this crap that he's dumped on you so that you do not feel as though it's your fault or that you deserve to be treated this way. The way a father treats his daughter, will greatly and directly effect the men she chooses to have in her life. I hope you know that you deserve better treatment from men, and that even through all this you still have a choice to make. Man, if I could just have 5 minutes with jerks like that....
832858
not really, other than my brother. i lived with my father, and he was too busy playing in his band and chasing women to have time for me and the rest of us that lived with him, much less any friends i had. oh, adult, in that case, he was too busy playing in his band and getting women pregnant and being a part of whatever family he was raising at the time to have time for me, much less my friends.
534552
I think he has not yet overcome his being a bachelor that he prefers his friends than family.  As far as I know, most responsible husbands & fathers prefers family first than friends or his bestfriend is his family, other friends just follow.
470035
Abuse. The sad thing is I probably would have stayed in that relationship a lot longer. But, then it happened! I had my son. The day I had him I knew I would never allow him to be exposed to that kind of a life. I remember thinking to myself, "My husband may be good enough for me but, he will never be good enough for my son because he doesn't care to change." Thankfully, now I know he wasn't good enough for either of us. I left the day that I got out of the hospital and never returned. My son and I lived happily ever after.
1143367
Fathers that you speak of is sorry men. A real man takes care of his children. He speak into their lives and guide them so that they will be successful in life. He sees things in them others don't see. I have two sons and they mean the world to me.
75100
dump the loser! If he wants to grow up and have an adult relationship with his children, he will. If not, you must instill them with values that will prevent them from becoming like their father. They WON'T HATE YOU IF YOU ARE LOVING MOTHER unless you spend your life obsessing about what a bum their dad was.
653985
Yes, I do! And I'm lucky enough to have a man like that! It's the younger women out there that put up with ' Mr. Wrong'. Most women over the age of 30 are tired of dealing with immature, ill-mannered men. They'll hold out for a decent man. Remember the saying..." young & stupid....."
605469
I believe that it is true that where you started does impact on how you end up!! Due to the fact that if your really from the ghetto and you had a bad home life, you would want more for yourself and more for you future family!! But it all depends on the person because someone who could be from the ghetto who has a lack of self confidence, they might think that they are to "stupid" or they feel they won't make it far in life!! So basically it would be that where you grew up is half of what impacts your life decisions.. But the other half is self confidence!
987058
you have to look into why YOU picked these guys. Don't look at your self as a victim anymore. You keep picking guys that "end up" being something that you should have caught in the beginning.\n\nwhat is it about these guys that you keep returning to- unresolved issues about your mom and dad, self-esteem, think you can change them, too much "giving" maybe a "martyr" complex...\n\nthe world is full of guys that aren't a.ssholes- why haven't you been picking them?
953707
Not just a bad person but a sorry father and a LOSER!!
238943
Have never known an italian....but have dated several Latinos.  My daughter's father is hispanic.  They can have their good and bads, just like any man.  Latinos, at least the ones I know, are very family oriented and loving.  However there are some that expect the woman to do woman things and the man to do manly things.  So therefore some have the expectation that you cook, clean, take care of the kids, etc.  If you are a traditional person you might find this comforting.  If you are more liberal....then I would try another race.\n\nI have also seen some that can very big asses.  Like I said that is in all races.  Try one of each and base your decision on that :-)
797230
My dad is a serial womaniser, but i don't think its cos he's insecure at all. I think its cos he has a lot confidence and knows what women want. Usually women pursue him so I can't sê how it would be related to any of his insecurities. I think its because he like women that's why he does it and not cos he wants to betray them. I think he may get along with women probably better than men in general., I'm nothing like him thank God
1061638
I'd give the guy a chance. You never know he may end up being prince charming in a  single parent "dad" costume!    After all, unless you were in his shoes, you can't judge why he made the decisions he did.