Clever/catchy name for booklet giving mums of schoolchildren humorous advice?
913469
mmmh.....don't take it wrong but it's funny.\n\nChildren's Books You'll Never See\nBelow is a list of children's books you'll never see in any bookstore!\n"You Were an Accident"\n"Strangers Have the Best Candy"\n"The Little Sissy Who Snitched"\n"Some Kittens Can Fly!"\n"Getting More Chocolate on Your Face"\n"Where Would You Like to Be Buried?"\n"Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her"\n"The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's  Book of Wild Animals of Western Europe- Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!"\n"All Dogs Go to Hell"\n"The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking"\n"You Are Different and That's Bad"\n"Dad's New Wife Timothy"\n"Pop! Goes the Hamster....and Other Great Microwave Games"\n"Testing Homemade Parachutes Using Only Your Household Pets"\n"The Hardy Boys, the Barbie Twins, and the Vice Squad"\n“Bubba”  Meets the Taxidermist"\n"Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence"\n"The Boy Who Died from Eating All His Vegetables"\n"Start a Real-Estate Empire with the Change from Your Mom's Purse"\n"The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy"\n"Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will"\n"The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead"\n"How to Become the Dominant Military Power in Your Elementary School"
403073
http://www.mothering.com/sections/about_us/press_releases.html
831524
This is a good one and its fun!\n\nhttp://www.childrenssoftwareonline.com/Default.aspx?m=item&pID=218
720900
To be honest the best way to help your child is to take them to the local library and borrow learning books. It will teach your child to appreciate books and there are so many stories and authors to choose from they will be spoilt for choice.\n\nI taught my children using the leap pad thing. It is expensive but I am sure you can pick one up second hand on ebay or somewhere like that.\n\nThere is a site called letterland which is what they use a lot in England. It shows you how to form each letter and they can be remembered easily because each letter has a character. \nThe internet is great for getting information, but you are the only one really that can help them. Take your time, be patient and take it at their pace.\nI also labelled lots of things around the house for a while and it didn't take my children long to read and spell most of the words. It can look messy with lots of post it notes everywhere but they come away easily and if it helps your child, so what!!!!\n\nGood luck x\n\nhttp://www.letterland.com/index.html
849770
Giggle (small one). I've heard it before but we need more clean jokes like that :)
455897
I read Heather Armstrong's blog, www.dooce.com. It's a site for anyone who has a slightly crude sense of humor and is interested parenting, work, religion, and other daily humor bits.  She's hilarious.
1067099
How about "WHERE DID I PARK MT BRAIN?"\n\nMaybe this will help you, for now.\n\n\nGreat Truths In Life \n\n\nGREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED: \n\n1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.\n2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.\n3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.\n4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.\n5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.\n6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.\n7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.\n8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.\n9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. \n10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.\n\n\nGREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:\n \n1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.\n2) Wrinkles don't hurt.\n3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.\n4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.\n5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.\n6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.\n\nGREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD: \n\n1) Growing up is mandatory; growing old is optional.\n2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.\n3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.\n4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.\n5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.\n6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.\n7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. \n\nTHE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:\n \n1) You believe in Santa Claus.\n2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.\n3) You are Santa Claus.\n4) You look like Santa Claus.\n\nSUCCESS: \nAt age 4 success is .....not peeing in your pants.\nAt age 12 success is....having friends.\nAt age 16 success is .. having a drivers license.\nAt age 35 success is ...having money.\nAt age 50 success is ...having money.\nAt age 70 success is ...having a drivers license.\nAt age 75 success is ...having friends.\nAt age 80 success is ...not peeing in your pants.
325242
There's a hilarious book out with that exact title.  Go to a local bookstore and check it out.
241571
http://www.readinggroupguides.com/guides/no_great_mischief.asp
395125
http://www.akobi.com/ebook-metro/fun-humor-ebooks.html you can see below the jokes in PDF format.
110836
Does your son use an agenda book for school?  I've seen my students open up their books and those who find surprise hello messages/ love notes showing no matter what happens... they have less stress, knowing they can do "no wrong".  I've written on my daughters' actual napkins and ziploc bags so that when they got to lunch they could eat, relax, and know that mommy and daddy love them.  Send a hot cocoa packet with a note that says, "when you get home, I can't wait for you to quiz me with the  hardest test question!"
342368
Closest thing I could find was The Modern Girl's Guide to Life by Jane Buckingham
238434
try cliff notes or spark notes
916381
Love that joke fidgety.Ah the innocence? of youth.\nDid you hear about the teacher who asked little Billy to put the following words into a sentence to show their meaning?\nAVENUE: Thanks to Mum and Dad,I avenue baby brother.\nDIARRHOEA:When we went on holiday last summer,my dad took one look at the run-down campsite and said:"It's pretty diarrhoea.\nECLIPSE: Every month my dad gets the garden shears and eclipse the hedge.\nFASCINATE:I have nine buttons on my shirt but I can only fascinate.\nAVALANCHE:In our house,we have a breakfast at eight and we always avalanche at 12-30.\nREVEREND:Teacher says if I don't study I'll be in this grade for reverend ever.\nPROPAGATE:Dad knocked down the old wooden fence,so now we've got a propagate.\nNUISANCE:Mum was complaining that she hadn't had anything nuisance she was married.\nJUDICIOUS:On TV adverts,they say that hands that judicious can be soft as your face.\nURINATE:You're great looking,Ma'am-in fact urinate,and if you had bigger boobs.you'd definitely be a ten.
833564
try an alliteration, something cathcy for them to remember, such as "All About Amazing Animals" or something along the lines of that.
914479
Taters and Tots... We have the Taters if you bring the Tots...\n\nCircus... Kids always want to run away to there...\n\nJust kidding... I just had to do that...\n\nBut try to think of something easy to remember, easy to say, and that sounds appealing... I know that's not what you are looking for... But I bet you could come up with something if you tried...
927037
listen to her, thats good she wants it to be srious not immature primary school stuff.