My mom doesn't know how to love, how do i love her back?
919978
It's hard to like a parent like that. Sure you love them because they're the person that brought you into this world but your mom sounds self absorbed and miserable. Not much you can do about that and definitely don't take it personally. SHE has the problem.Shes too wrapped up in her own self to take notice of you and the sad thing is that that kind of behavior is HER loss.Keep the phonecalls short put a timer on in your kitchen when you know you're going to talk to her.Feel free to interupt her  and start talking about your own life whether you think she's interested in it or not.You weren't put on the earth only to service her needs. If she sounds lonely make brief suggestions for her to join some groups or other practical solutions to her problems.If she starts up with the same old stuff again the next time that you talk to her interupt her and tell her that she already told you about that and you want to know when she's going to do something about it.It might sound mean but it's really not.Not allowing her to go on and on is being kind to yourself and it forces her to  get the fact that you're not willing to listen to her if shes not willing to try to make the effort to solve her own problems.Good luck...
477444
Mom is someone who would always what betterment of her children. so if she asks u to do something  that she thinks is right for u  then thats becoz she  loves u a lot & cares of u, i completely understand what u  must be going thru when ur mom fails understands ur  views of life ,but believe me that too is just becoz she loves u a lot , she still thinks that u are her little kid & she needs to take care of u . now at this stage , if u are not able top convince ur mom towards something , take  the help of another person who can convince her, any of ur moms freinds or her siblings or any elders in the family whom ur mom respects &  obeys & loves. make them understand the  facts  & ask them to convince or make ur mom understand that u are right .\n       One last thing  ur mom is a person who has brought u this  world , she is the one who has equal rights on  ur life as u do. becoz u are a part of her own self.\n        LOVE UR MOM A LOT , TRY TO KEEP HER HAPPY.\n\n AND ONE LAST THING  "ITS ALWAYS NICER TO WIN THE BATTLES WITH UR KINDNESS."\n\nBE EXTRA KIND TO UR MOM  MAKE HER FEEL THAT SHE IS VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT TO U & U WANT HER HAPPY ALWAYS  TRUST ME , SHE WILL MELT FOR U .
811786
It's late in her life--later than she'd planned and this is something you can do out of the goodness of your heart.  It will make her feel better, and you will feel better in the long run for having done it.\n\nI'm divorced and remarried with a son from my first marriage.  I always encouraged my son to love his mother no matter what she had done, no matter how hard it was to forgive her for it.  Because you can always forgive someone.  \n\nPeople say stupid things when they think they have the time and the latitude to be stupid.  That's where your mom was when she told you things she should never have even thought much less said.\n\nForgive her.  Let her go to her eternity in as much peace as you can give her.  You will be rewarded in your heart if not in other ways.
1068033
hi, i am so sorry that you are hurt, but i understand.  hurting your mom is the worst feeling in the world.  the worst.  but the best medicine is free.  don't do any of that writing notes crap, that is really chicken shit.  you hurt her, and you are old enough to own up to your mistakes.  you just march yourself up to her and say mama, i can never tell you how sorry i am, i love you, i need you, and i'm not too proud to say it.  then tell her that you know that your time is coming.  you'll have a mini me someday, and it will come back around.  it's called the circle of life.  lol.  the easiest answers are always the toughest.  god bless
327475
You and your Mom don't get along? Is that something you want. Decide whether you want to keep her in your life and if so, tell her how you feel...that a relationship with her is important to you, etc.
156718
Well Sweety, honesty is in most cases the best policy. Don't you think that she will find out one day? I would sit down with her and tell her that you need to tell her something that she might find shocking or that she might be upset about. Then, tell her, "Mom, I want you to know how much I love you and what a good mother you've always been (if this is true), and I need you to hear me out and try to stand by me, because I really need you now." Something to that effect. You may want to pick up some literature on parental understanding and support for parents of gay children. There's no real easy way to do it but I can tell that it's something you must do for your own peace of mind. I'm a mother and I can tell you that for most mothers, there is nothing that will change their love for their children, even if they are upset. The bond is so very strong between mother and child that I'm willing to bet that she will not stop loving you. She may be upset and unaccepting at first but if you keep the lines of communication open, you will work things out. Good luck, Honey. Here are some websites that might help you:\nwww.gayfamilysupport.com\nwww.outproud.org/brochure_for_parents.html
1093587
I can tell you from experience it isn't easy.  However, I now have the advantage of being much older and am able to look back on the situation a bit more objectively.  First off, realize that this has nothing to do with you and their love for you.  This is a relationship problem between the two of them that you did not cause and you can do nothing about.  Next, continue to love your parents equally and do everything you can to make this as easy for them as possible.  Take time to talk to them and don't be afraid to let them know how you are feeling and ask them questions about what is going on if you need to.  Don't let this situation control your life, life will still go on and in a basic sense, nothing really is going to change all that much for you in the long run.
165735
Start by not making an assumption about your boyfriends mom.  She may just simply not be the type to get close to anyone that isn't yet family.  She is also going to be naturally worried that you might eventually hurt her little boy.  Just relax and be yourself, over time you will prove to her that you are worthy of her boys heart.  In the mean time try to talk to her and find out her interests.  If you show an interest in her as a person and not just his mom it will help.  Sometimes it just takes a comment about how you hope that some day you can get to know her better to get her to open up.
269919
You need to love and cherish you mother, she is not going to be with you forever. I am sure that your mother is a great person and she probably is not as embarrassing as you think. \n\nEnjoy every single moment that you can with your mother. She obviously loves you and wants the very best for you. Swallow your pride as hard as it may be and just let it go.
855528
The best gift you could give her is your time, a shoulder\nto lean on, a ear to listen and love her.  No object could \nbe as personal and those things she can take with her and\nyou can keep those memories in your heart forever.  Keep a journal and ask questions about her life that only she can answer and one day that journal will mean so much to you.  I am sorry to hear about your Mom, my Mom died August 2005.
336027
Love isn't something you can just snap your fingers and it appears. It takes time. It takes getting to know him... doing things with him.\n\nThere is this fabulous thing called bonding. When we are born we automatically bond to our parents.... birth or otherwise. It is a survival tactic at that point. Then time moves on and that bond becomes stronger... deeper... emotional. \n\nWhen you are talking about loving someone whom you meet at an older age it takes time. A couple of months is not going to cut it. It may take years. Sometimes it never happens.\n\nIt seems like you like this man and would like to love him, so my bet is you will get to the point where you love him. If you are a girl... one day he will be the person by your side walking you down the aisle. If you are a boy... one day you will look to him for all the sage advice your mom has no clue how to give. Either boy or girl... one day you will call him dad. \n\nDon't try to force it... just spend time with him. Include him in the things you like to do. Try to participate in the things he likes to do. Talk to him. Make up a problem... true or otherwise and let him guide you along the right path towards resolution. This will help him feel like he is your father.\n\nRemember you are not the only person who is trying to cultivate a parent/ child love for this relationship.
796280
tell your mom how you feel
1035293
I know it's hard to sometimes show love and affection when you're not used to saying it or have been shown love, But she is ur mother and consider ur self lucky..My mother died when I was 2 1/2 yrs old and I had my father who wasn't very loving, I knew he loved me, but he never told me until now ... I'm 20yrs old and Everytime we talk he says I love you....but it took us long enouf to say those three little words...which I hoped I had that when I was growing up. Love you're mom no matter what ...say I love you to her....be thankful and lilttle by little things can get better!!!
38273
Try talking to them, show them how much you realy love and respect them, and try to compromise. Your family, specially your dad and mom, will always love you, even if they sometimes dont show it due to your unobediance or stubbornness.
325416
Your mother is still a human being, she may think you hate her, and imagine if the person you love more than anything started hating you.  How would you feel?  My mother and I have a very rocky past, but In the end, a simply, tear-filled, "I love you" gets the point across.  It sounds like she has her hands full with the house, and is hurt about how you acted.  On the other hand, it also sounds like she isn't quite as forgiving as she should be.  But like I said, she is only human.  I think it is the hardest part of growing up when you find out your mom isn's SuperMom, but a person with her own doubts and feelings.  Hug her, tell her you love her, and walk away.  Just walk away and let her calm down.  Clean a bit, but do it when she isn't looking, since you don't want her to think you are only doing it to get on her good side.  You aren't.  You are doing it because you care...
578606
Love comes in many shapes and forms but how a person shows it is the real answer here. Obviously she is has issues that she need sorting out wheter it be mental or addiction and once these are resolved maybe you would find the mother you desire. But this is not an issue you can address to her. I think she should be not a part of your life until she gives you the respect and love you deserve otherwise she would be a bad influence on your outlook in life. I had similiar circumstances and no longer speak or have contact with mine and I have found it easier not to look at the what the problem with me, but realise she has the problem and she wont confront her demons. I have turned out ok but the real problem was it took years for me to realise that ther was nothing wrong with me and I did deserve to be loved without being self destructive. Believe in yourself and have faith that early in your life you have managed to learn and handle a truely difficult situation without doing harm to yourself and those around you.
501377
Don't worry..she probably doesn't mean it. She'll take it back later. My mom has told me that a few times.