Unrequited love...divorce soon?
927041
You don't need to show her the door, unless she is already seeing someone else. \n\nPeople can say and do strange things, that they may regret later.\n\nTry to be the best person you can be, and stick it out for now. If she chooses to leave, you will have give it your best shot, and perhaps improved your own life and character along the way.\n\nP.S. Be nice, but not clingy.  When the subject comes up, just tell her calmly that you expect things to work out between the two of you...and you are willing to give it some time.
976072
It doesn't sound like a marriage made in heaven.  If your intuition is telling you something is wrong, then I would have to agree with you on that.  With skimpy facts here, I'd say that there is a rocky road ahead for that couple.
619350
Personally I wouldn't be thinking about getting involved with another man so soon after divorce. You will find your soul mate when the time is right. Have some "down time" for yourself. Divorce is not easy on the heart, so heal first before rushing into another relationship. Your knight in shiny armor is out there somewhere, weather your divorced or single.
632933
yeh, it's possible. and you can try counseling. i fell out of love. and i don't think it's gonna work for me.
1070796
I haven't the answer to your question, but something else that has helped others who found themselves in the shoes you find yourself wearing now ...\n\n... When a Mate is Unfaithful : \n... Infidelity - Its Tragic Consequences \n... Is Reconciliation Possible? \n... The Option of Divorce \n... Meaningful Support \n... Why Some Stay Together \n... Who Is Responsible? \n... Does God Hate All Divorce? \nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/g/1999/4/22/article_01.htm
785136
It sounds like both yours and his priorities are noncommittal. Seeing each other when convenient should be enough for now. If this was love you would not have to ask this question.
249764
Congrats! I too am 40 and single again and almost from the gitgo found the perfect man.....he was thoughtful , he brought flowers, he held my hand, was every bit the gentleman, and we fell for each other at hyper speed,two days later he said i hope this is not to fast for you, but i love you,  i asked him if he would like to get married in 2007 three days after i met him and he said yes. That was june 2005.....3 days after my divorce became final.The wedding is may of "o7 and if you just treat her like you want to be treated and be considerate you will have no troubles. Good Luck!
504478
Don't divorce over a moment of unhappiness. Try to make it work if you can because divorce is one of the most painful experiences ever. It can ruin friendships and families. Your children will definitly be affected and so will you even though you think you don't love him. Stay committed to  the vow you made and learn how to be happy where you are. Many people because of unhappiness chooses divorce as an option and it should never be an option. Be an adult and communicate how you feel to your husband and see a marriage counselor. Please don't be like everyone else and take the easy way out. If he is not abusing you or mistreating you, be happy. He may be the best thing for your. I've been divorced for 2 years and dating is hard. Sorry men, but these men out here are a trip. Trust me, the grass is not greener on the otherside. Don't you know many people would love to have what you have. That is why they date. My advice is to stay and make it work because it can.
464789
If he loves you and you love him then you will get married when the time is right.  However, you have to be patient, if his marriage ended badly (emotionally that is) then he might not be ready to commit just yet.  You should not take that as a sign that he does not love you or doesn't want to be with you.  Just go slow and keep talking to eachother and it will work out the way it was intended to.
698169
he's acting like that because you are going to be divorced soon and I bet he is married.... just from the way he is reacting, so move on dear - and give yourself time to heal completely before trying to get into another relationship. (you have to resolve all the issues that lead to your failed marriage - if you don't you'll drag that old baggage into another relationship.) If there was anything there you two would of met in person.... you talked for a long time without meeting and that should of told you something about him. (I've only met one man online who wasn't married and he was honest with me about his personal life and that's the man I'm married to! We talked for about 2 months and then we met in person - he helped me with coming to Canada to meet him.... and we "clicked" - and got married 3 months later! We have been married for 4 yrs. as of Sept.28th).... While I was single and chatting with men online for years --- they all turned out to be married or living with someone(with whom they had kids with).
409093
"I don't want to divorce him over something this minor. (He would be left alone)"\n\nThis doesn't sound minor to me.  I'm 34 and going thru a divorce right now for similar reasons.  My wife and I have been married for 5 years, and I've never loved another person so strongly and intimately; but I've discovered that I'm not sexually attracted to her.  I tried to tell myself that it was a simple problem, and that it wasn't worth ending the marriage; but over time (and through therapy) I've learned that I was manipulating myself, and her, trying to keep the working parts of our marriage in tact at all cost – and damaging our relationship along the way.\n\nMy opinion: you are not responsible for his feelings, and you are not a bad person if you "leave him alone".  He's an adult, and can only benefit from facing this situation honestly.  How rewarding is this marriage going to be for him (or you) if your relationship isn't completely honest?  \n\nCHEAP ALTERNATIVE TO THERAPY\nTry 12 step meetings.  Not AA, but AlAnon, or better yet, CODA if it's available in your area (Codependents Anonymous).  You'll find yourself in a room full of people who are facing similar problems head-on, supporting one another without any bullsh*t.\n\nHope this isn't too preachy.\n\n:^|
1128347
Well, as a wife and mother of 5 children and married for 23 yrs...I can honestly say love is unconditional and is sometimes a rollercoaster...if you are not already married, you still have a choice...but do know this friend..."what once was, can be again"...sometimes you have to return to your first love..the things you did...what you said...how you treated each other...now, if those "things" you refer to are harrassing, violence, and such...a sit down talk in a "neutral" spot is the answer there. Be honest if this must be done...be specific..& don't leave it "open ended"...like "we'll see"...I need space for now...needs to be clean cut...best of everything!
373052
oh, sweetie... time doesn't matter.. i met and married my husband in four months. My soulmate. Get a friend... smile even if you want to cry.. watch a funny movie, comedy speel, think happy thoughts. It will get better. you can feel free to e-mail me er1ca2000@yahoo.com.
1172602
I asked a similar question on here about 4 months ago.  People were all like "go ahead and tell her."  She freaked out when I did and it pushed her away.  It's hard to know when that magic time is, but I would make sure that you've waited a decent amount of time.  ALSO... ask yourself why you love someone.  Is it just because he rocked your world?  Or is it because he exhibits the characteristics of someone you truly care for.  What is the harm in waiting?  Is he going to leave because you didn't tell him that?  Saying those 3 little words takes some of the interest out of the relationship for some.  They feel like its too comfortable and lose interest.  I am in favor of telling people you care or love them because life is short, but I would really think about why, and then not pay attention to all the idiots on yahoo and make your own choice.  Listening to them will not get you anywhere. (aka Nate Diggety the f%&king idiot)
629224
TWO WEEKS??? OH MY! that is just too quick.  He needs to slow down and make that proposal in about another two years.\n\nYou don't say how long you know him - is it only two weeks?\nWhat is the rush??  You have your whole lives ahead of you to be together.  Take the time now to get to know each other, and discover what goals you have set for yourselves.\n\nYou could marry now and in two weeks be a divorced couple.\n\nSlow down - the best is yet to be - there is plenty of time ahead.\n\nGood Luck!
637179
Been there done that...whats up with the 23rd year...Its alot of years, you'll never forget the past, my marriage was great the first 20 years, but I could see the dis-interest building as the months after pasted by...and she too felt she was no longer in love with me, however I later found out her interests were directed toward another...suggestions..Seek marriage council advice, put forth a 100% effort to resolve such conflict, and if it doesn't turn out happily ever after, if there ever was an ideal time to be single , its with a good job, no mortgage and your child a grown adult...very simular to my situation...its was 2 yrs separated and 3 years since divorce and those conditions were blessings in disguise.
51798
I agree with Dragon on this one.  Yes you are heartbroken and yes it wil take some time.  They say divorce is like death.  The processes of grieving are very similar.  The only difference is that the one that you love is still alive and kicking.  Take this time to examin what you want out of life.  Appreciate this time alone and do things that you could not do when you were married.  Enjoy the lack of nagging and complaining.  And enjoy that you can act as you did before you got married.  Time heals all wounds and with this time, you have the ultimate chance to reexamine your goals and proiriities in life.  Take it one step at a time and you will be fine.  I know the pain that you are going through and I know that it hurts.  But trust me, your heart well eventually stop bledding and once that happens, chances are you will see that one true person that you are meant to spend your life with.