how to deal with people with confrontational people when you are not a confrontational person?
927528
be assertive not aggresive\nthat is my way of handling this situation
695438
Fortunately,  I don't  have  to deal  with that kind of  issues as we  have  learned to respect each other and value each others accomplishments even if they are minuscule in comparison to the rest.  However, the best way to deal with those is not  take sides or simply do what you just said, pop the IPOD and hide under rock!
300793
Just give them their space and let them work it out on their own.  Never take sides..Just listen if someone needs to talk..that's all.
361378
It depends on the relationship I have with the person.  If they are family, I just get nasty with them and don't pull any punches.  (and I can strip someone with my tongue very easily)  If they are an acquaintance, I just ignore them.  In my situation, this is the worst possible insult they can receive as most folks around me like being in my company.  I let the person see me looking great, laughing (could be about them or not) and generally having a great time.  I'm like you, I prefer not to swear, as it shows poor manners, so sometimes my revenge is more a mental discipline then a verbal one.
566738
You're contradicting yourself... you have a friend but you can't talk to that person because you're not friends? You had war... ahh! It's human nature to fight. Just wait it out a little. Let the anger pass. Later when you both are calm, talk about it, say sorry if need be. Friends are treasures.
786488
The first thing to do is to remain calm yourself. Let them know that you hear what they are saying and really listen to their complaints. Ask them to please speak slowly and try to relax so that you can help them to resolve whatever issue may be causing them distress. You must never argue or show negative emotions of any kind. Let them know you appreciate their business and you will do whatever you can to help make their visit as pleasant as possible but unfortunately some things are not within your control. Also, try to get the assistance of a level-headed co-worker or supervisor.\n\nI hope this helps.
133490
If it doesn't have anything to do with you, politely tell both sides that you'd prefer not to get caught up in this and that they need to solve their disagreement themselve. You do not want to take sides and it's best to just walk away and let them fight it out. Good luck, =)
266143
dealing with stupid people
605279
Unfortunately, having to interact with persons that you do not like is good training for the "real world".  We all have to work, at some time, with someone that we do not want to work with.  The best way to deal with such a person is to treat them with kindness.  If he's looking at you in a threatening way, then smile, and say "How's it going, Man!" and then go on about your business.  If he insults you, then say something like "Hmmm.  I see where you're coming from!" then go on about your business.  In other words, don't feed the fire, and by being "cooperative" you will confuse him when he does not get the reaction that he expected.  On the other hand, if he is threatening you with physical harm, then do not walk away but look him dead in the eye and tell him to "lay off".  Hold your ground, and your eye contact.  Most bullies will run when confronted with determined opposition.  And do alert your teacher or principal if you feel that you are in real danger.
82181
This is hard to answer due to the fact that there is information missing about the specific circumstances, but I will give it my best...\n\nWith any confrontational situation, the first step is to acess the danger you may be in.  If the situation appears out of control or threatening to you, you should remove yourself from the environment and contact the authorities as quietly and discreet as possible.\n\nIf however, it is not immediately threatening or the person(s) are just very upset, your goal should be to diffuse the situation.  This is accomplished in most cases by allowing the person to vent a little and listening to their concerns.  Taking notes and responding with confirmational nods and "yeses".  After a short time, explain that you have no reason to doubt their claim and it would not hurt to apologize for their experience.  Then proceed to explain that you are going to do everythiing you possibly can to help them, but they need to remain calm and show you the same respect you are showing them.  This works with most people....if they can see that you care about their situation, they feel better....especially after they have vented and got some tension off their chest.  However, you mentioned that these are gang members?  Again, if they are threatening to you, I would not try to negotiate with them, I would contact the authorities.\n\nBe careful and good luck!
1148174
Be professional and mature and remember to think as the higher person because the person who is making fun of you is obviously extremely low and you don't need to stoop to their level.  Just tell them you do not appriciate what they are doing and walk away from it.  It really makes you look like much of a stronger person.
197571
Speak to them in private. A person in charge doesn't appreciate being undermined in front of the people they're in charge of (unless, of course, you want to undermine them!:). Be very polite, but firm, and back your reasons. The traditional argument paper form could help here:\n\n1. State problem/solution\n2. Reasoning for solution/Reasoning for it being a problem\n3. Counter any responses you may expect/Interpret why the current solution is being used, but say why that's wrong\n4. Sum up\n\nOf course, a conversation is different than a paper. . .
1141803
Tell them when they are done fighting and being kids then you will talk to them. Till then walk away. You don't need to get in the middle of THEIR fight.
373693
Firstly you should know that when anyone behaves like that they are being completely unprofessional. Never ever ever ever get drawn into that kind of behavior. You cannot win an argument by yelling. Remain calm, look the person straight in the eye, smile, if you can, and say.. I get the feeling that you are upset, would you like to talk about it, I am sure that whatever it is, it can be resolved.  This will catch them completely off guard and will probably get them to stop behaving badly.\nIf it is a job that you don´t care about, and you were going to quit anyway, let him have it..say something like..Who do you think you are talking to,you cannot speak to me like that.  If they have a superior even better, add that you will be speaking to thier superior. Stand up for yourself, because if you don´t, you will run the incident over and over and over in your mind wishing you had said this or that.. but never lower yourself to their level.  Stay calm.   and then slash his or her tires..lol just kidding
37264
Walk out of the situation before the anger takes control of you. Like 'babygirl' said, it will give you time to cool down & think through the situation sensibly instead of causing harm, whether physically or verbally, to the other in a fit of rage.\n\nThat's what I do, just walk out on the person or just don't talk. I am known for a vicious temper & that's how I deal with it. :)
916357
treat them with politeness and courtesy and take a few deep breaths and try not to knock them out
894920
I have the same problem.  People always say "think b4 u talk", but that's fricking hard!  There are only a few seconds to which there is time alloted for you to think of an answer.  Then the person leaves you in the dust.  It's like a reflex...you defend yourself before anyone else has a chance to inflict another blow.  Next time, just relax yourself b4 a conversation and remind yourself not to lash out, no matter what.  Of course, you will forget to remind yourself after a while, but the next lash-out will bring you crashing back down to earth.  But for now...just apologize to the girl and explain that you didnt know what you were saying.  She should understand.  It is hard to deal with this stuff, but you will get over it.  Dont dwell on anything.