How can you be so loved, but feel so lonely inside?
930065
Unfortunately, you are totally normal...got that normal.\n\nToday, it is hectic...everyone is in a rush...and we forget to celebrate.....with just sitting down at dinner and making small talk. How's your day....really, mine was.......did you draw that all by yourself...I am so proud....\n\nWe think there must be more out there......and sometimes the winter blues do get us down...and slowly we think of doing other things in the winter.....like what....painting pictures.....why not...no stuff....so go to a craft store...and selfishly buy something only for yourself...yes just for you....and make it...whether it's painting a picture, or making a piece of jewelry, or just getting artificial flowers and putting them in a nice vase.\n\nDo something just for you.....and offer the creativity to your MAKER....Yes don't forget GOD, and if you don't feel close to GOD, who moved?
676107
Benn there many times. Just hang in there. People who are kind and deserving of you will see through the outer shell and love you for who you are. Just keep being you. Good luck! :]
1114453
Of course you are worth being loved!! Just keep loving yourself and taking care of you. Don't settle until someone accepts and loves you completely for who you are!
866349
Dear Downhelps:\n\nIt seems like you are feeling this way mainly because of a boyfriend who may be acting as if he is losing interest in you.  Is this correct?\n\nIn our human personalities we express many different things.  We are able to succeed sometimes, be smiley sometimes, win friends sometimes and so forth.  But we also can meet up with opposition, limitations and those who pull their friendship away from us.  The human personality goes thru many changes.  It is always shifting, changing, and altering.  It is never stable and on an even level.\n\nOur souls or spirit behind our human personality is the seat of higher thoughts, self-love and love of others.  It is unchangeable, never alters or shifts in it's position or outlook.  It is capable of withstanding the lack of love from outside of itself.  This means that inside of YOU is something CERTAIN about itself.  It loves, it thinks highly of itself (because it is God's Created Child) and it knows every brother in the universe has the same Self or soul within them, too !  If the human personality changes and thinks it no longer loves or it no longer likes another, the soul within that person still loves or likes the other.  Soul knows nothing but love and liking.  For it is like God in how it thinks.\n\nWhen the soul through the human turns itself over to love and suddenly finds itself lacking the loved one's interest, in it's wisdom it does not cling.  As the seat of wisdom and love, itself, it knows when to let go and release the other.  BUT, it knows that it can produce more love for itself simply because it desires it, and is open to having it and can produce more of it again.  The spirit within has self-esteem, because it is connected to God Who puts high value on it.  \n\nValue your ability to produce love over and over again in your lifetime.  Have the strength of wisdom to release those who need to be released and to know - their changing feelings are part of their personality.  We do not have to be hurt or harmed by those who go back and forth in their feelings.  Or those who we have cared about more than they cared for us.  Sometimes, our human minds like to punish us and tell us we weren't enough to hold onto love or friendship.  But it is telling us a lie.  And, we don't have to listen to it.\n\nYOU are an Eternal Being.  God made no losers.  He made us like Himself:  strong in love, willing to let go, when necessary, to honor the Free Will of his Children.  He is in a constant state of knowing that He produces love ceaselessly by Creating it.\n\nWe create it also!  We produce it over and over in our lifetimes too! There is someone else coming for you when you smile again and make more friends.  You brought this friend toward yourself, didn't you?  Well, why not bring another to yourself?  You have power.  You have ability to attract and bring to yourself what you desire and think about. Do not give up your power just because someone wants to move on. . ..  Cause another friendship, be part of another love.  We do learn lessons from our loves.  They are valuable if they do not knock you down!  Take the good out of those lessons and USE IT.  Take the rest of what is in those lessons and throw it away!\n\nYOU did not suddenly become unworthy, unlovable or unlikeable because someone else's personality did not show you consistent feelings.  You are still YOU.  You gave your boyfriend power over you.  Now take it back!  In time, you will stop missing him.  I promise you that.\n\nBest regards, Lana
572908
You know I had this problem when I was younger too. I still work with this to this day, but I have come a long way in this. What is blocking you from loving yourself is low self esteem. You have to learn to nurture yourself, to understand you are as special, as valuable, as needed as the next person. \n\nOne method is to begin doing things which you can take self pride in. Look around at your life and really see what you do which is good. What are you good at? What skills do you have? Like are you a good friend? Really listen to others? Are you quick to lend a helping hand? Are you good in a certain area in which you excel? Do you do your job, no matter what that job is to the best of your ability? Do you do all in your life to the best of your ability?\n\nListen, when we are injured during our childhoods, or in our teen years, we develope a sense we are not valuable, that we are somehow lacking where others are not. Deep down inside our souls we feel like we are just not as good as other people. But this is often a false feeling. It exists because we were shammed durring our childhoods. We were not loved and nurtured as we needed to be. \n\nI once thought I was so much less than most everyone else around me. Due to this feeling I did not believe I deserved a good man, a good frienship, a good relationship with anybody, or deserve to be treated well. \n\nI treated others very well. I was, and still am a very loving perosn. I bet you are too. As I was growing, walking through life, I noticed how gentle I was to others, how forgiving and understnading of others just being human and nobody being able to be perfect. Then I had my "AH Ha!" moment. I realized I treated others way better than I treated myself, or how I allowed others to treat me as well!! I looked around and then looked at myself and I thought, why do I treat others way better than I treat myslef? Why am I more forgiving of others than I am of my own weaknesses? Why am I more willing to forgive the mistakes of others, yet I constantly condemne myslef for mistakes which are far less than most of those others who I forgive so quickly?\n\nWhen I realized that I was treating others way better than I was treating myself, when I realized I forgave others when I could not forgive myslelf, I finally began to wake up. I told myself that I was as deserving of treating myself the way I treated others. I deserved to nurture myself the way I nurture others. I deserve to forgive myself the way I forgive others. I also deserve to recognize my own skills and talents as I am always cheering on others skills and talents. \n\nI began looking inward, deep inside. I began to list all my good qualities, skills, and talents. At first the list was very small indeed!! While I began listing these qualities, I also began to attempt to nurture myself. I began to attempt to forgive myself. I had trouble with this at first, but I would just stop in the middle of a huge self criitisizing session, just stop myself in my tracts by saying inside my head "Stop!" Why am I being so mean to myself, when I would treat somebody else who did this exact same thing so much more gently, and I would tell them not to be so hard on themselves that everyone is only human and we all make mistakes. I would stop and think what I would say to somebody I loved who had done or failed to do, the exact same thing I had just done. Then I would begin to tell myself that "I am only human, I can make mistakes, I am as worthy of forgiveness as the next person, and I deserve to go easier on myself.  \n\nSlowly my life began to change. I began to expect better treatment from others. I demanded to be treated with the respect I deserved. I would no longer tolerate certain abusive behaviors towards me. I walked away from relationshipe which were damaging to me and my children. I slowly began to treat myslef better. To love who I am and to forgive myself as I forgive others.\n\nDuring this process I got a di
1081529
Ya wanna hear something goofy? When I was a teenager, I felt just like you! I would wish to god I was a Siamese twin, just so I wouldn't feel so alone. It is hard to explain, I wasn't really lonely cause I had lots of friends and people who loved me, it's more a feeling that all of them and the whole human race belonged to this,(something) what ever it was except me! I could be in a room full of people yet feel all alone. Then one day I started asking myself: WHAT DO I WANT? As I lay in my dark bed   crying myself to sleep, I would ask: WHAT DO I WANT RIGHT NOW? WHAT WOULD MAKE ME FEEL AND FILL THE VOID IN ME? Perhaps something that would make me a part of something! Well I don't really know what to tell you except I volunteered for a suicide hot line, I served underprivileged children dinners, I  worked at a mission, helping the homeless, I sat with the elderly etc. and as time passed, the awful feeling of being alone gradually went away! That was quite a few years ago and I haven't felt that way since. I don't know what happened, but what ever it was, it sure worked for me. Maybe it will work for you too! Good Luck!
315451
write down how u feel on a blank white paper..be clear of how you are feeling. when u do this, u'll know what's really bothering you.\nWrite down what makes you sad, and what makes you happy, and then focus on the one's that make u happy. most of the time, its the past that's holding one back. always remember its your present that will determine you're future, and you have to make sure being alone does not come as something that is bad...lots of things can be achieve even as you are alone, and trust me..as you write down what makes you happy, u'll realize life is worth the while\na heart can be broken, but not your dreams. rediscover it
14880
having nobody to be loved
790920
Well, finding a person to make you feel whole is not the answer. Hang out with family and friends more. Also, get into a new activity that you've been wanting to try. Volunteer doing something that means a lot to you. That's how you start to feel whole.
1085030
It is a matter of self-esteem.  You feel worth less when you are alone, however, that does not have to be.  You really can focus on yourself, find out who and what you are and what your limitations are and validate yourself in that knowledge instead of feeling lonely because you can't validate yourself in another.\n\nI am a widow and am alone, I am happy with myself and do not need a partner to validate myself.  I have my agenda as well, and I do not wait for a man to come around.  \n\nBuilding your self-esteem is easy.  Look at what your talents are and keep on developing them.  Look at how you are and try to throw out things you don't like(i.e., do you have a tendency to interrupt people, do you talk too fast, etc.)\nLook at your physical appearance and change what you don't like(unless it is something you cannot change, i.e. your nose, short legs, long legs, etc).  All this will bring you to a point where you love yourself, and if you love yourself people can see that--and in all likelihood are you going to be desperate for some time with yourself then.  You have to love yourself, like what you see in the mirror---and that will reflect in your entire personality, because then yourself-esteem will soar and you will have a much easier time to find someone.\n\nLearn to accept the things you cannot change too.  We all cannot change things like the size of our feet, the length of our legs, or the size of our noses---but we sure can make the very best out of what we got.  You don't have to be a beauty queen to love yourself, and you also don't have to have extreme good talents to love yourself, all you have to do is make the best of yourself--inside and outside, and you will never be desperate for any relationship/comanionship.
480080
totally agrees with you.  The world is full of ppl we can connect with without acutally "knowing" them.  Like if they eat with thier mouth closed, do they put the toilet seat down, turn off the shower thing on the tub when they get out, etc etc etc.  I think you can develop feelings if you talk to someone for a long time, yes, but I think it is far from love.  In order to love someone you have to see all the negative and positive at least to make a judgment based on fact and not just what they might type to you.
260006
I understand your loneliness completely, and it is a very difficult emotion to deal with, maybe you may feel better if I were to share with you the fact that I was once married, I loved pure and true, and was abused and hurt.\n\nI then remarried 3 years later, and although cautious at first, I learned to give again whole heartily and loved again pure and true, and was abused and hurt again.\n\nI now have been single for 10 years, and I despise loneliness, although I am very happy with myself, and love myself.\n\nAnd although I have only been allowed the opportunity to be a part time father, I feel a great and powerful sense of loss, as I have never believed in Divorce, however this is the reality with in our society today, that it takes two to Merrie, and only one to divorce with no reason stated or given, they call it no fault.\n\nI must say that had I ever known my marriages would have ended up in Divorce, I would have rather been lonely, and just happy being me.  Although I have no regrets, and love my children dearly.\n\nMaybe possibly if you were to think of all the things of which you would have to sacrifice with in the confines of a relationship, especially it your partner were to abuse or hurt you, then you could take more satisfaction in your single status, and appreciate it.
393859
i completely understand. i have the same problem. i think you have to be happy. just because there are people around doesn't mean you can't be lonely. like something is missing and you're not quite sure what sometimes. doctors sometimes help but i think it's all something that can be worked on by ourselves it just may take awhile. i'm sure this isn't really an answer but at least you know you're not alone in this aspect :)
1041800
Some people feel lonely even when they're surrounded by tons of other people.I sort of feel that way too.There can be a million people around you and you feel that no one in that group understands how you feel deep down inside.They think they do but they don't and you can't find anybody to confide in.It's a horrible feeling.
1062094
you have someone to be with you and care for you. with him your never lonely and when your hurt you got someone to comfort you. when u go to him u got someone to play with and lean on. he keeps your happy when ur sad and sometimes sad instead of happy but ur always gonna love him.
290189
Oh huny, I hope that you are not feeling lonely.. Please dont feel lonely.. Theres always a girl out there in the world who needs you in her life. You just have to find one.. No more tears, no more sad faces... Just smile, and more gilrs will notice you more... Keep your head up... As I like to say... "Sometimes in order to go forward, you must go backwards."
961697
I can relate to you. I have felt this way before but I have realized that if someone hurts you, then they do not like you in the same light in which you like them. You call this first person as a substitute for being with your soulmate, but no one can really be with someone who has no feelings for them. On top of this, no one can be with someone when they do not feel it 100%. I hope my advice helps you, and I sincerely hope you can get in contact with your soulmate. Best Wishes.