my x-boyfriend is unhappily married.he still loves me,but has a 15year old.will he free-up for me soon?
339443
All I can say is....WOW...
1171786
no sure how long you two have been dating, but beware.  Guys who usually rush into marriage thinking should send up warning flags.  I was in a relationship that moved like that one, and he was very emotionally abusive, and would most likely have been physically abusive if we had gotten married.
321466
You need to follow your heart, first and foremost.  From what you are saying, it sounds to me like you and your boyfriend are already done, but you just dont have the guts to end it.  The sooner you do end it the better it will be.  Dont keep putting yourself and him through the pain, just tell him that it is not working for you anymore.  You deserve to be happy and it sounds like you will be with the 30 yr old so I say go for it!
391788
sounds like he needs to grow up and you say he's 30!!! that's really sad...the only advice i can give you is put him in situations where he has to talk to you but to be honest with you it sounds like he doesn't respect you and maybe he is trying to find excuses to leave you you say he did this with his ex's well look where they are now  i hope you are able to solve this problem good luck.
109344
It (probably) means that it wasn't meant to be. You two have lived it up and have produced two lovely children. I'm sure the both of you love them more than life itself. But perhaps that's where it ends...It seems like you have tried everything. Hell, you even went to counseling. Good job on both of your parts. You two want it to work. Maybe you're going through a phase? Maybe you should spice things up a bit. Join a club together, join together in a new sport, go hiking, camping, maybe you could spend less time with each other. Mabe ALL you need is a BREAK. C'mon now...16 years together. THAT tells you something. It cannot just stop like that. Do not give up. There is a reason why the two of you are together. There is a reason why you met, why you got married, why you decided to create children. Reminisce together about the days when you were younger, the crazy things you guys did for each other, the first time you told each other 'I Love you', etc. Do not give up. If it's an attraction/physical thing, work it out (Literally). Get sexy, make him look at you like you're the hottest thing to have walked this earth. It's not over sweetie. I believe in you guys.
948730
O sweets! The "one" is so complicated. I think when all girls have a crush at that age, they think/wish/hope he is the "one". But seriously... He probably isnt. Who he is now, wont even be close to who he becomes later. I dont know anyone who is the same person at 25 that they were at 15. 10 years makes a huge difference, and the cold hard truth is that relationships started when so young, USUALLY dont last. Over 85% of marriages between the ages of 18-25 end in divorce. Thats the majority of people getting married. You can never really know someone till you've lived with them for a few years. There is an old saying, Love is blind, and marriage is a real eye opener. I wouldnt worry too much about finding the "one" right now. I believe destiny and fate have everything worked out already for you and when its right, things will fall into place for you and him to finally come together. Good luck
727385
Don't beg or plead, you are much better than that! Let him go if he wants to go, he's the one who's going to miss out not you. PLus you are a nice caring young girl who had her whole life ahead of her. You don't need that b.s. in your life!! Find someone better!! Someone that is going to appreciate you and treat you like a PRINCESS!! Good luck and I hope that you find someone MUCH better! =)
595664
I don't believe that for a second.  No way you can stay with someone, put up with everything for 14 years and not having feelings.  He's just made/making a choice and the easy way out for him is to convince hisself he doesn't.  He said that for 2 reasons, one to hurt you and the other he's trying to convice hisself.  He'll figure out that he was wrong later, but it will be too late, if he was to want to fix it.  Sorry about your problems.
1091699
It sounds like your doing fine as you are.\nStay in school.  Loook forward to college and getting a good job.\nIf he is still the one, then he will be fine with keeping things the way they are, and you can make it more permanent in about 5 years.
33176
I met my wife at 22.  but I told her I wasnt getting married till I was 30.  she broke me at 28.  I knew I wanted to get married and I new she was the one, so there was no need to wait any longer.  But I have to admit, I wasnt ready one day before I came to that realization.  My best advice to you, would be to express to him in a loving way, how much it means to you.  Ya know, subtle hints...and lots of um.  \nNo nagging, No whining.  He will either get sick of you talking about it and give in, or he will get sick of you talking about it and leave you.  Either way it just depends on what you want out of life.
726963
your situation mirrors mine!  when i met my now husband i was 23 and a party girl from hell.  we dated for a while then i moved in with him.  during the whole dating episode, it occurred to me that my partying lifestyle is not one to support a strong marriage.  so after a few small fights, we broke up and i took that time to cleanup, ween myself off the party atmosphere and make the decision of a life of bliss or all the alcohol and sex i wanted and end up being miserable and addicted.  seems like an easy decision, bu it wasn't.  luckily, with the assistance of prayer, i chose to be with the man i love and have fun but doing the things we both truly love to do.  i don't regret a moment.  we love each other to death.  two nights ago we just celebrated out 1st anniversary and he left me a note on the fridge saying that he fell in love with me all over again the other night!  i can only pray that you and the girl you are going to marry are as happy as we are.  \ngood luck!
270998
why were u with him for so long??\ni've seen couples like this. they usually stay together.\nwhy? - don't ask me; i hate feeling trapped! - but that's just me...\nif it works for u -ok!\nif it doesn't - cut him loose!!\n...although after all this time u're probably used to him and feelin' safe\nur choice..
247284
I am going to live with my boyfriend soon. And I would not want to be married before having lived together for at least a couple of years.\nBut hmm 14 years, that is a long time. Maybe he is just one of those millions of people that does not value the institute of marriage.
785571
Please move on for your own sake.  Find someone who will be with you through thick and thin.  Obviously, he still does not know what he wants.  And with a 13 year old, he should definitely man up and stop just coming around when he feels like it.  So DATE, you will feel better about yourself.  You deserve better than what he is giving you right now.  If he does change, and proves to you he has changed, and you want to be with him - then great, it was meant to be.  Until then, don't let him run your life.
1015361
Absolutely...I'm getting married in March. I'm so in love. I thought I was "in love" before but that was infatuation, idealism, or whatever else...but it was not what I feel now. Also, my parents have been married for forty years, as his parents have. It's hard work and sometimes hell; but, as I've heard many times, "When you're going through hell - keep going!" His parents and mine are living proof that it still happens. People just get screwed up by thinking it's all easy and there is no hard work.
651015
IM BISEXUAL AND LOVE A MARRIED MAN. STRANGE RIGHT? I KNOW. NO SEX INVOLVED. THIS IS A STICKY SITUATION AND ONE THAT SHOULD NOT INVOLVE YOU. IM NOT SAYING THAT YOU SHOULDN'T BE WITH HIM. HE NEEDS SPACE AND HE MADE THIS PART OF THE MESS AND PROBABLY DOESN'T WANT TO SUBJECT YOU TO THE FUCKING DRAMA.MY ADVISE IS TO LEAVE AND MOVE OUT. HE NEEDS TO BE CLEAR ABOUT WHAT HE WANTS AND YOU LET HIM. IF HE LOVES YOU AND YOU LOVE HIM THINGS WILL WORK THEMSELVES OUT. IF NOT, THEN YOU WILL FIND SOMEONE ELSE. EVER HEARD "ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR"? I GUESS IT IS.YOU WALK OUT AND SAY GIVE IT A YEAR, CAUSE DIVORCE IS MESSY.AND IN THIS CASE IT DEFINITELY IS. IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE LET THEM GO. IF THEY COME BACK TO YOU THEN....THEY ARE YOURS..{SMILE I KNOW YOU ARE SAD} . BE STRONG GIRL,LOL HOPE THIS HELPS.LOL MEXXXI
845029
You are obviously still young enough to find a better person.  This guy has waaaay too much baggage for you to carry.  Take it from someone who wasted alot of her young adult age on the same guy you just described.  Believe me, you're wasting your time.  At first, because we were "in love", he was all for the "help" and did alot to stop the bad habits he had.  But after a few years, he started to resent me, because I had "tied him down", "made his life boring"  you get the picture.  Then when he became depressed, because he wasn't having any "Fun", (If you call drinking yourself unconsious fun or getting arrested because you started a fight at a gas station, fun)  He was so pissed at me all the time, because he couldn't go "out" that he started to verbally, then physically abuse me.  I tried to stick by him,  help him, I always told him that "all I wanted to do was help him", he just said I was trying to control him.  He would purpously start fights with me just so he could leave and use me as an excuse to go "out".  The funny thing is , I refused to listen to my mom.  I paid for it with nine years in hell, and I haven't seen my family for twenty years.  Please while you still haven't been through hell, get out.  If you choose to stay, keep in touch and on good terms with mom, you WILL need her someday.  Watch out for the warning signs and take care of yourself.  Good Luck