why do so many people have jokes about chunk norris?
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Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.\n\nChuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.\n\nWhen Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women.\n\nMacgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.\n\nChuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.\n\nChuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.\n\nIf you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds till.” After you ask, “Two seconds to what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face.\n\nChuck Norris only masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.\n\nRather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.\n\nChuck Norris appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.”\n\nChuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.\n\nSince 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.\n\nChuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn’t stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.\n\nFilming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.\n\nChuck Norris’s girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, “HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!” and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend’s bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, “Don’t fuck with Chuck!” Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.\n\nChuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.\n\nChuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK’s head exploded out of sheer amazement.\n\nChuck Norris is not hung like a horse… horses are hung like Chuck Norris Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.\n\nTo prove it isn’t that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.\n\nThere are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.\n\nThere is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.\n\nChuck Norris once lined up to kick the winning field goal of a high school football game. When the football went flat, he persuaded the referees to let him kick the field goal with a 3 month old child. Chuck roundhoused kicked the baby 60 yards throu
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When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesnt get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.\n\nChuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.\n\nSome people like to eat frogs' legs. Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs. Hence, snakes.\n\nThere are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.\n\nWhen Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.\n\nChuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.\n\nA Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.\n\nWhen Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.\n\nScientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick)\n\nChuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.\n\nHow much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.\n\nChuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.\n\nIn honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chucksized. \n\nChuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.\n\nIf tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.\n\nChuck Norris can divide by zero.\n\nThe grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.\n\nA picture is worth a thousand words. A Chuck Norris is worth 1 billion words.\n\nNewton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.\n\nChuck Norris invented his own type of karate. It's called Chuck-Will-Kill.\n\nWhen an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.\n\nWhile urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.\n\nChuck Norris once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was plagiarized from his autobiography.\n\nWhen Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.\n\nWhen Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.\n\nWilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."\n\nContrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.\n\nChuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.\n\nWhen taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.\n\nChuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.\n\nWhen you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.\n\nChuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.\n\nOn his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.\n\nNobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!\n\nIn the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "
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cuz now a days kids r obssed with chuck norris...and make all kinds of jokes about him about how beastly he is
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I get most of his lyrics..He just says whats on his mind..he doesn't try to be fake..I think he says a-lot of the things people keep bottled up inside, and don't know how, or are afraid to put into words..\nSome of the things he says that offends others, "especially women" makes me laugh!!\nHe is to damn cute and you can tell he is a sweet guy!\nI think he is very intelligent..He has made millions pissing people off!!\nAnd making people like me laugh!
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Oh yes!  He makes fun of everybody: white, black, mexican, chinese, mentally impaired. He doesn't leave anyone out and he doesn't try to hide anything.  He is my all time favorite comedian. He so ROCKS
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It's a great joke, because all the verbally challenged people who say "u" instead of "you" are dead like they should be.\n\nI'm waiting for the version that has dead people who say "lol". That'll be a scream.
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in show-biz you have to come up with new things all the time, you can't do the same thing as the comedians before you and it's really hard to come up with something clever, so they resort to insults. and not only that, but the majority people like it because ... you know, you don't have to think about it too much.\nanyway, i don't think americans should be judged by their comedians
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Making jokes about other people is not necessarily about whether or not they are likely to see them.  For one thing, they might have friends who use the Internet who will tell them.  But the basic idea is that you shouldn't be making insulting comments about people anyway.  The people who do read them can be offended, just because they respect the Amish.  And they display a coarse sense of humor and a bigotry that is inappropriate.  It's like the tree that falls in the forest when no one hears it: it will still be laying on the ground when someone shows up to see it.  And it will still be laying on the ground even if nobody ever sees it.\n\nMaking rude jokes about other people is not appropriate.  It's just not.
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Because Political Correctness has no sense of humor. Before PC, Polock jokes, anti-Catholic jokes, dumb people jokes and many more were regularly told regardless of who was listening. In those days, you laughed even if it was at your own expense, or you were a poor sport. Today, everyone is so oversensitive about everything that jokes are almost extinct. Today, the only 'correct' way of making people laugh is through vulgarity. Kinda sick, huh?
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Are people so lazy that they cant tell a joke??\nwell heres one about an optimist sardarji. The sardarji became a major in an army and he led the army to the battlefield.Needelss to say they began to lose and one soldier says "sir, we are surrounded on all sides."The ever optimist sardarji replied"look at the positive side boys, we can shoot at any side"lol.dumb joke.
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CHUCK NORRIS!!!!! Pleaaase he is THE man... Steven?? I never liked him that much...I dont know, theres just something about hims that is like 'mm'. Anyways, Chuck Norris is a SIMBOL!! That look...those moves... He is the -ucking king!!
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Chuck Norris is an experienced martial artist and former world Karate champion. He has trained with Bruce Lee and helped him create his famous style Jeet Kun Do.\nMacGyver gets his butt kicked every week it is a no contest.
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When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.\n\n(Supposedly a couple of Mr. Norris' favorite - mine too)
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When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.\n\nThere is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.\n\nOuter space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.\n\nChuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.\n\nChuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.\n\nChuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.\n\nChuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.\n\nThere is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.\n\nWhen Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.\n\nChuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.\n\nChuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.\n\nThere is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.\n\nChuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.\n\nChuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.\n\nChuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.\n\nChuck Norris can slam a revolving door.\n\nChuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost\n\nRemember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV. \n\nContrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
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A woodchuck named Chuck was a terrible woodchuck. He only chucked when he was playing b-ball. He was called "Chuck the Chucker."
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You know why is zigzags right. you say you don't but you know. \nIts chuck norris bending it before he throws it at people
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Chuck Norris doesn't need new jokes.  His old jokes continue to kick a**.