How do I get my boyfriend more comfortable with the idea of S**.....?
337099
WAKE UP GIRL!!  Do you know how rare a find he is?!!?  \n1. Don't change a thing!  That is assuming you give one ounce of care about your future. Or your future spouse for that matter. Just what will you tell them, "it didn't really mean anything," "I really can be faithful to you"\n\n2. BIG MISTAKES start out with very very small compromises.  An alcoholic doesn't start out addicted, he starts by watching others, then thinking about it, then just one taste, ect, ect. \n\n3. Wake up and realize it now and save yourself the  agony of regretting it later. I know it's hard to imagine yourself grown up, look around you, it IS going to happen and you will never, NEVER be able to come back and rewrite it.  I promise you, you will never regret it, and that's one thing you don't ever want to have to live with regretting . . .
845769
I know you hear people talking about "working" on a marriage or relationships, but its not like putting a wing on a house.  From what you say it sounds like you want him to be more sensitive as you perceive yourself to be.  Men and women are different, why do you want to feminize him?
417061
I agree with gailforce wind.  There are some men out there that may feel uncomfortable with a woman trying to teach them new things especially if they know that she is more experienced.  So when you do have sex with him in the moment try to work it in by saying something like do it to me this way or can we try this and see how it feels like.  But in a passionate way in which he feels in charge and comfortable. You will see that he will be willing and up to most things then. I am a male and I speak as one man's opinion.
205516
When I'm having sex, my mind becomes a lot less verbal because I'm so into it. I feel like I become more animal. So I wouldn't worry about him not being into it, he's probably really into it. But if you like dirty talk, you should tell him. I don't think that would scare him, it would probably turn him on and he would try it.
716814
Sorry, I'm not a lady, but I am a gay man.  Even if I weren't, I think my answer is still universal.  You need to be honest with him first of all.  Tell him that it makes you uncomfortable.  But let him know that it's not anything you'd like to end the relationship over (because trust me, you don't).  It's just that it's something you're not used to and you wanted him to know the truth of the matter because you like to keep the air as clear as possible.  You do like that, right?  \n\nThe fact of the matter is, the human mind can get used to any sight, smell or sound as long as it's not physically damaging your body.  Your mind sees to it that you're uncomfortable around deformities because your mind has a presculpted idea of what a body should look like.  When someone's body does not add up to this idea, your mind will initially not trust it.\n\nIf you get along great, then you need to make your mind get used to this deformity.  Ask him not to hide it so much when you're around, that way you can get used to it.  He will appreciate the effort, and the honesty.
770932
OK, here it is. First of all, ALL men, yes ALL, have fantasies and they all want to have a spicy intimate relationship with the one person they have to chose to be intimate with. Now, all you have to do is gain some confidence in yourself and have some fun turn this issue around to where it's no longer an issue. Yes, I know it's easier said then done. Listen to me, tell yourself how great you are, how lucky any man would be to be with you. You have to carry that attitude around because if you can't feel good and comfortable with yourself, how can you expect anyone else to? Think about it. When you feel confident, you welcome other people to get closer, and when you feel fear, you build an invisible shield that even you can't get through eventually. Stop what you have been doing, because as you can see, it isn't working for you, and put a smile on your face and get what you want! I really believe that your lack of confidence has created this problem. Didn't your boyfriend fall in love with you for the way you look? Well, you are still you, love yourself the way he does...for you. If you lose yourself, he'll lose who you are too, and that makes for a very unhappy relationship.
610106
Do you not have any imagination? \nDo what comes natural to you and your partner. \nIf it feels good and does not hurt anyone do it...You both have to be willing.\nYou can buy books and CD's on this subject...
304300
Try new and exciting things together that neither of you have ever done before.  Any interest in sky diving?  Bungy jumping?  Not that advnturous?  Join a gym together and work out together.  Play board games FOR SEX BETS!  If u win u get whatever u want and if he wins he gets what he wants.  Makes it much more interesting!  Pick something u have ALWAYS wanted to do and then just have him join you!  Or ask him if theres something he has always wanted to do but hasnt and do that with him!!!!!  Good luck to u!
468739
Hi!,\nIt sounds like you would like your boyfriend to be more open and to communicate his thoughts more. If he does not open up and communicate what he is thinking, feeling or doing you would be left to think many things.\nMy first thought would be, has he always been of this particular nature, that is not open, or not very communicative? If so love him as he his.\nMy second thought is, you would like to have a partner that is open and communicative. Perhaps that is how you are (open and communicative), and you have that recipricating need. It would not be healthy heart trying to guess what another person is thinking. We are so often incorrect to try and guess what a person is thinking. What is, is, can be a simple thought. A person who thinks less could be more at peace, at least not so stressed. Try it. Try and be more like him, since you wish perhaps him to be more like yourself. Good Luck
276699
Sit him down and tell him seriously.  Don't listen to these clowns and make it sound like you're on the bi bandwagon and cheap and sleazy.  Chances are he'll be into it, but if you tell him gently there'll be less a chance of him being shocked and feeling slighted.  AFTER you've told him gently and the two of you have talked about it like mature adults then y'all can have fun.  Good luck!
403701
Buy some videos on techniques, like giving a better bj.  Preview it and see what you think, but the idea is actually to watch it with him to practice.  He will love the idea that you want to try and the visual stimulation more than your technique improvement I bet!  There are some good videos out there on numerous exciting topics for couples.
998733
well first of all put on sum sexy lingerie,dim the lights, maybe cook up sumthin nice for him and just try and make everythin romanitc and when he comes in u can pounceon him and start givn him **** or just take it kinda slow at first but b sexay and kinda tease him.u can evn take the lead..my man luvs when i do that lol..then maybe try sumthin new,not just the same thing everytime it will get old!!! well i hope i helped u!! good luck sweetie
1120745
first off, are you comfortable enough to have this conversation with him?  if so, and this might sound funny but it works, tell him to, uh, fire his gun on his own earlier in the day or at the very least the night before.  it will make him less sensitive when he finally does get with you.  also, tell him to focus on your pleasure, not his.  again that sounds funny, but if all he is doing is thinking about not lasting long enough, it will be over before he knows it.  tell him to kiss you , touch you, whatever, but keep his focus on you.  it shouldnt be a race to the finish line, it should be an experience. he may not learn this in one try, but over time he should master his control and be able to please you for as long as he wants.
522842
You've already gotten a lot of good (and bad) responses.\n\nThe key to any relationship is communication. And I think this is obviously where you think you have some problems. I assume you guys are comfortable talking about everything else. \n\nFor one, you need to talk to him. Pour your heart out and let him know where you stand. After 5 years, things do get stagnent. He may think your sex life with each other is fine where it is. You need to share with him your desire to spice it up.\n\nSometimes what holds a guy back is stress. If you have an opportunity, get a babysitter for the night/weekend, cook him a romantic dinner, turn off the phones, play some relaxing music, and talk the night away. Give him a back massage. Let him know he is loved and that he's appreciated. Ask him what he would like in your sexual relationship from you, to spice things up. \n\nBring up some options: Role Play. Having sex in a different part of the house (having sex in the same bed for 5 years can get old). Getting dressed up. Watch a porno together. Have sex with the window shades open. Turn up some music. Turn off the TV. Candles. Clean sheets. Go dancing. Go on vacation. Go to a Bed & Breakfast. Go to the beach. \n\nI've also seen a statistic once out of Europe that found that men find their partners more attractive when the household chores have been done. This maybe more related to stress.\n\nThere is sooo much you can do to help spice up a sexual relationship, that I think you should make the first move.\n\nAlso, don't make him feel bad for any fantasies he has. He's a guy. Sometimes you can even play into his fantasy. If he wants to have a 3rd party, but you don't, then by all means do not. But you can pretend:\nOne night, while you guys are about to have sex. Undress him completly. Tie his hands to the bed post and blindfold him. Once you've done that, tell him that you have a surprise for him. Tell him you've invited a female friend over to join the two of you, but she doesn't want him to known who it is, so he must keep the blindfold on. Pay a neighboorhood kid a dollar to ring your doorbell. When it rings, cover him up in a sheet, and tell him to keep the blindfold on.\nThen you get changed into a lingerie, put on some different perfume, put on makeup, change your hairstyle, etc. Go to the bedroom and tell him you're letting your friend in and that you just want to watch. When touching him, change your style. Have fun. Remember, the brain is the largest sex organ.\n\nOnce you've gone through some sort of process to spice things for him, tell him your fantasies you'd like for him to help fulfill.\n\nBest of luck to you. If nothing else, just remember to "talk".
238987
it really depeneds on what type of person he is.  an almost sure way of doing it is something sexual because men a very sexual but it needs to be something special.  if he has a specific fantasy that you could fufil or a outfit you could wear...most men love black.  or if he is a more sensitive person you can always make him a bath or get him flowers, i know that might sound like something only a woman would enjoy however allot of men would respond to that.  also you can always cook for him or order in a catered meal if you dont cook.  the always say "a way to a mans heart is through his stomach."  but really you know him better than anyone else and whatever you decide to do will be perfect i am sure.  finally consider that sometimes men will give subtle hints as to what they want so try to pick up on those.
1065301
Talk more about that TOGETHER and try to get a solution TOGETHER.  A possible idea is trying to give as much possible pleasure to your partner before inserting it, and then proceed as usual.
1046699
I'm simply in awe that you were able to wait that long before you decided to take your relationship to the bedroom...\n\nIf you are scared about the weight, woman on top and spooning are good choices.  Same with doggy style.  \n\nTalk with him and find out what he thinks.  Does he have the same concerns as you?  \n\nAlso, I see no reason to post that he is of a different race.  If it doesn't bother you any other time, why should it be a factor now?