Would you let your ex see your child if he was supporting financially ?
341765
Only if he is a good person to be around the kids.  Any jerk off the street could financially support someone, but that doesn't mean he's a good role model.
688607
I'm afraid you're stuck.  In the court's view (and mine too), you helped make that child, and, thus, are responsible for helping raise him.  Your ex's response to you, however, is mean and vindictive.  Someday he will find out you are alive and wonder why she lied about you.  Continue the child support for your son's sake.  At least then you can say that in spite of the meaness of his mother, you still did everything you could to help in his rearing.  He will someday understand that it was his mother that forced you out of his life and that it was not your decision.  If you stop child support to spite her, you will hurt your son as well.  If there is to be any hope of a relationship between you and your son when he is eighteen (then your wife can not longer stop you legally), you do not want to hurt him in any way or give your ex any more fuel to use against you.  Be the better person and then stick it to her when you tell your son the truth when he is eighteen!!
388998
Take the bit*h to court, that way if you get partial custody and visitation rights, she cant sue you for child support.  You'll be suprised how fathers have rights these days to help them see their children.
396411
I know how you feel.  My son chose to stay with his dad after my divorce.  I have our daughter.  The distance is near 1000 miles so, I am not able to see him much.  I do call him every weekend and see him at least 4 times a year.  It is still not enough and I am frustrated since I am unable to do anything about this.  (Work, money, ect...)  My son knows that I love and miss him so much.  It hurts.
281408
I think you should take him back. As long as you think he'll be good with the kids, I think you should not deprive them of thier father.
1105782
yes and no. It would not hurt to help him out a little bit while your son is with him. Send him some money to help pay for things. After all he has helped you out alot. maybe not 300 but maybe 100 to pay for anice dinner or a day at a ball game or something. if nothing else to even say thank you for the break.
1039072
My ex pulled stuff too. Your ex will probably get away with it. Just concentrate on the custody. People like your ex will find a way of getting out of paying and you don't want someone like him raising your child.
725942
You can open all the accounts you want, just make sure the childs mom does not find out that your able to save money on what is left, she gets gready and wants more. This is when they will start looking at your income. \n\nPaid child support for 12 years.  I gave the impression to the ex that I was poor, but the whole time I was well off.\n\nI paid child support on time only to watch my ex blow it on herself
748563
i feel your pain brother, and yes it is true. my ex did the same s--t to me. i have3 kids. pay more than that per week and also provide medical,dental,and eye care.\nthe real kick in the ass will be when her NEW boyfriend(unemployed also of course) moves in and you end up supporting his ass too.\nkeep your cool and remember that the children come first.\nGOOD LUCK
491280
child support because there is another life involved than just yours
209639
I had a ex of my get it once. it was about 2 years ago.  I thought about it the other day, brought up the "what if" question, but i wasn't in the position at the time to devote everything to a kid, so I think of it that way.
89032
you can make a deal... I'll sign these papers if you lower the amount owed. If your friend hasn't seen the kid, has no relationship, then he should at least allow the kid to have a Dad by signing over his rights. Maybe he could get a stipulation that makes it an open adoption?
992382
I think it would be great if we got some of these deadbeat parents to pay up!! I don't know anyone who is getting rich off child support. My support for my oldest is $200. a month. I haven't seen very much support..In the last 10 years I have received $377. SAD...isn't it. I think if he wasn't able to get a drivers license that would make a difference in the amount of child support I would see!!
433556
Alway's think of the child first.It look's like your ex-gf is going to make your life a living he** anyway.If you really want to be in your child's life,take your ex to court,and get visitation right's after the birth.Sometimes,but not always it help's to know wheither her parent's are on your side somewhat(IT MIGHT HELP YOU).I've been through this kind of crap before myself.Good luck to you.
267745
One thing a learned about co- parenting is that its complicated. But if the child is his why isn't he supporting him. Assuming,that the two of you are not in a relationship, and it's his son, of course he should give money every month.  The two of you should have to sit down and determine how much you spend on your son every month and figure out how to split it all in half. Negotiate and be reasonable and let him know that you want him to be there for your son not just financially but emotionally and physically too. Child Support is like the last solution, if you don't think that he will stick to the monthly plan on his own then go file child support. He just has to realize that it's a 50/50 thing even though yall are not in a relationship. IT"S HIS SON TOO! Make him realize that.
769243
I am in a somewhat situation.  Baby's father has been gone for 2 years with no contact or request to see is his daughter.  Today he shows up at my work place in disguise of hood and glasses?\n\nI am custodial parent due to his absence.\n\nMy feelings are that if a "parent/father/mother" held an interest in their child, then why cause such an absence?\n\nLaw states that after a period of one year that the parent has "abandoned" the child.  Then why allow that parent any right to see or visit the child?\n\nAfter this period the child no longer remembers nor feels any level of love or safety with the unfamiliar face.  The lack of continuous contact has depleted the bond between infant/child and the absent parent.\n\nTo simply pay an amount of money to the Mother/Father for the sake of "child support" shouldn't give that parent the right to visit the child.\n\nThe comfort level, ease and knowledge of an otherwise stranger, should be considered on behalf of the child.\n\nI feel that if an absent parent is void of contact, yet pays child support,wishes to see their child, it should NOT be allowed under the child safty act.\n\nWhile the law may say that the lack of child support payments should not void a parents right to see their child?  I beg to differ!\n\nI say that if a parent loves their child then it is unreasonable to abandone that child.  And to simply pay some amount of money does NOT give you a right to be in that childs life!\n\nCustodial parents are there to comfort the child when they cry out at night, get a boo-boo, need dinner, sick, afraid or feel harm, pay medical bills, do the birthday party and are there to explain Princess Fiona and Shrek.\n\nWhere is the "absent" parent?  The lack of "moment" does NOT negate parental obligation and committment.
458364
Most of the answers are pretty hostile to you, but I won't be.  \nIf you offered a place to your ex and her baby, you seem like a generous and kind person.  You had compassion on her especially if she was living out of her car. Why does that compassion have to stop if you want to be involved with somebody else?  Is there anybody else she can depend on? What was the agreement you had with her when she moved in?  Temporary til she found a place, or indefinte?\n \nA single mother and child needs stability and security, and if you aren't willing or able anymore to provide that for her, then hopefully you will help her make other arrangements.   The old flame may or may not work out, but it really shows your character as to how you handle the situation.