Gays, your first relation are always painful???
345110
If you wanna feel  it , just  start with a cucumber you'll see!!!!!!
264678
I would say that has a lot to do with ur childhood and how u were raised.  this happens in all relationships that have some sort of dysfunctional unhealthy relationship wether heterosexual,bi or even gay relationships there is no difference on how the person behaves with another.  If you wanted if before u had it than tells me you like the challenge and when u have if finally the challenge is over an excitement must be gone as well or even some sort of control issue's with ur own true feelings in fear of getting hurt or theirs whomever takes the other for granted later.  we tend to immitate our peers when we grow up even if we did not want to handle things similar but we do sometimes ....think of it this way were u taught anyother way ?  hard to change but if u want to u can change but doubt overnite need to get some therapy or more education in the area if were not raised to be a certain way or taught to love us more than another first and demand respect or ta ta cya....lol.   good luck
57636
Homophobic has alway gotten me ... Fear of man? And when you tell a gay what it translates too, they get po'd.
1155499
its because sometimes being gay means you will be prepared to live a single life and grow old  alone unless you found somebody that will sweep you off your feet, thats a different story. difficult? no. life is just a matter of adjustment.
1001275
I have many friends that are either/or.  They are still good people but have a difference on their sexual outlook.  If they are your friends that is all they have to be nothing more.  I had a male friend who I did not know was gay and when he told me after 5 years of friendship I was only upset because he didn't tell me.  I told him I still loved him the same and we were best friends for many more years after that.  Some people are very mean when it comes to that.
390620
i dont think its a big problem on how to have a boyfriend... maybe ur a GAY that's why??
1169991
Well you shouldn't feel uncomfortable, (but most guys are homophobic) Just tell them nicely that you are not interested or that you have a girlfriend. They will get the point, no need to bash on them. Respect others that are different from you.
118850
That would make anyone feel insecure.When you get involved in a relationship its very difficult to maintain friendships with people of the same sex because it causes allot of tension even amongst friends.If you feel uncomfortable about it,try talking with him,if he is serious about you he will probably scale back on contacting them or involve you in the friendship.Listen to your inner gut.
664331
your gay? that sucks balls
535568
It's not wrong but it sure is painful! You have to go through confusion and angst just to get yourself to admit your feelings and then when you have already passed that stage you have to go tell your friend. But you know, through all that pain - you'll find more joy with that person than with those you just met and decided to go out with. It's like - the more pain you experience, the more joy you gain after the whole thing. Why? Because you know this person and this person knows you. You trust each other coz you're already friends. You've already passed the 'getting to know you' stage of a relationship and the next thing you have to do is enjoy each other!!\nThings get complicated though, and much more painful, if your friend doesn't feel the same way. Some feel betrayed when they find out their friend's in love with them. They say you betrayed their trust and that sort of thing.\nBut you know, the key thing is patience and persistence.
283200
I, like most of your other answerers, take each individual as they come.  Some people are more trustworthy than others, some people I like better and are they are more fun to be around than others.\n\nI have found that, in general, I have a lower tolerance for spending long periods of time with gay men than I do with lesbians.  Generally speaking, the gay men I know tend to get on my nerves more than my lesbian friends - however, that may be due to the fact that most of the gay men I know are youngish while many of the lesbians I know are older and more mature.  There are young lesbians that annoy me just as much as the young gay men do.  \n\nFR
1046152
My best friend is gay, and he gets tourmented and bullied, and people who don't even know him shout things at him in the street. He is the most charming, lovely guy I know, and he has been in a committed relationship with his boyfriend for the last ten years! \n\nIf I am with him, and people challenge him, I get so angry. Why should he be denied the right to live his life the way he wants? He's not doing anyone any harm. I always, always stand up to homophobic people. I got beaten up once because I was defending a 'faggot'. \n\nPeople are ignorant and stupid and it makes my blood boil. I will fight homophobia, and anyone be damned who dares challenge me on it!
97001
It's different for each person.  I assume by your avitar that you are female.  If that is the case, it will probably hurt the first time, maybe the first few times.  \n\nI would recommend waiting until you are married, it is definitely worth the wait!  It's also nice to know that your first is someone who is planning on sticking around.
798500
Why would anyone choose a difficult life?  Especially when it would be so easy according to straight people to "choose to be straight."  If so, I have a question for them.  Why don't they CHOOSE TO BE GAY?  See all those emotions running through you straights right now?  That's how we feel.  We feel "how can we change, if we could, wouldn't we?  Same as straights who are asked to think gay."  They find it incomprehensible to think about men, as I do about women.  Its just not normal for me, sorry, does that sound like a choice or something I'm stuck with?  I cannot remember feeling anything other way from the age of 5 on up.  The men were always attractive the women were always the nice ones.  So, while it may be a choice for some, it was not for me.  The very idea that I could have CHOSE this life is laughable.
1113431
First you have to be sure about yourself, once you have accepted the fact that you are gay and there is no way of changing the fact then you have to be strong, because over the years to come you will hear all sorts of jokes and comments that are cruel, but are based on ignorance. You have to understand, that you have had time to become used to the idea of being gay, and probably have for some time, but when you come out to your family, this will be the first time they have had it confirmed and it will take them time to get use to it. First level with them, just sit them down and level with them, don't do what most gay people have done in the past including myself and that is to try and hide it, because you can never get away from it. The next thing to do is to be the man that you are, being gay doesn't mean you have to be a pansy, you can still be the man you know you are and the man they thought you where going to be. Move out as soon as you can and avoid contact with them for a few months, this does two things. 1. it gives them time to discuss, fight, backstab and blame each other, without yuo having to hear it or feel guilty about it, because you didn't choose to be gay, you where born that way, and anyone who says other wise is a bloody idiot.\n2. This gives you time to explore your sexuallity without the fear of being caught with your pants down by your parents.\n16 is young, but at 16 I knew I was a raging queer, but it wasn't until I was thirty that I levelled with my family, during this time I explored straight relationships, gay one night stands, sauna's etc... But in the end I faced my fears and relized if I didn't level with my family, I would never have a chance of being happy with my own life and to me my life is the more important that the embarassment I caused my parents. For ten years I have lived in a gay relationship and now my family accept my partner as a part of the family, they now accept that they are not going to get grandchildren but now they have had the time to relize that I hadn't change, I was still the son they had 42 years ago, good luck kid, but careful there are some crazy mother----- out there, but be happy and have fun
980830
i could never understand how hard it must be....God has to know how hard it is. No body can live up to the expectations of the bible. No one fits in 100%. Its way to much to live up to. I believe that you want what you want because someone made u that way. I had a best friend that was gay and he killed himself last year. He was the funniest most amazing person i knew.  Its hard enough dealing with life as it is ...and its so easy to say well just dont listen. I just want you to know that not everyone feels that way. Not everyone hates just to hate. Just be strong even though its hard, the worse thing you can do is be someone your not.
1020989
don't fight it.  just be yourself and don't try to label it as "gay" or "straight".  you don't HAVE to be either, just be true to yourself - that's the only way you'll be truly happy with your relationships.\n\nkeep in mind that when being true to yourself and finding inner happiness, you will also come across ppl who don't understand and you'll have to deal with those ppl as they come, but remember; this is your life and you should do what brings you peace.