the dad of my son is livin with me. my mom wants him out. when he leaves hes goin to his ex house wat do i do?
345516
you need to leave him love. sorry but i was in the same position as you, but i was the ex. he went away and i knew what he was doin cause he admitted to me he had a baby with someone else, and i had dumped him. however, he kept coming round me BEGGING me to return to him. so you need to be careful bout what he is telling you and what he is telling her. you are worth more than that. dont put up with the insecurities you have over him. he will only make them worse. an in my opinion the last time my mum was wrong about something, was wen i hadnt told her the whold truth. your mum obviously dont like him, and she wants the best for you, even if it dont seem like it sometimes she does. trust. go and bond withyour baby. have a nice summer with no man pisin you off. okay. gudluck.
104806
Sounds like the only one creating issues here is the ex. She is trying to control your life, if you let her do that now it only unleashes her to have control dangling your son as the means to keep you doing what she wants. That relationship is over. DO NOT GIVE HER ANY CONTROL. She cannot keep your son from you. Hire an attorney and through the courts establish a visitation schedule. If she goes against it she will be in contempt of court and could possibly face jail time. As for your current girl, be completely honest with her about whats going on, be prepared for angry outburst. She loves you and will be angry about the threat that the ex has made. Communicate and come up with a game plan, the attorney, court, visistation etc. If you cannot afford an atty. contact the legal aide services in your area, they will provide you with one sometimes for free but most likely a fee in accordance to your income. Unless the child is endangered under the care of his mother, you should not take custody away from her. A child needs both parents and this traumatic event may scar him for life. Instead keep your cool, no matter what, let the ex be the dramtic physcho, do things according to the law. Pay your child support and follow any guidance the judge imposes and it will serve you well. Again it is important to maintain a calm composure, air out your frustrations with friends. When you have your son for a visitation, keep it positive, loving, and within a secure comfortable surrounding. The important thing here is that you are happy and being a positive role model for your son. So if this girl you want to marry makes you happy, go for it. Do not let the ex know your intentions it is none of her business. When you apply for a joint custody hearing she'll find out through the papers she recieves. I would have as little contact or communication with the ex as possible. You can also set up to have a chaperoned drop off sight when you pick up and drop off your son. If teh ex wants to act this way let her suffer the consequence for behaving like an immature person. For future reference, check the legal age at which your son is allowed to declare which parent he wants to reside with, in my state it is 12 yrs old. If you handle this right your son may feel more comfortable with you than with his mother and when he is of age you can ask him if he'd like to talk to the judge about living with you. One more important word of advise, NEVER badtalk his mother to him. Regardless of how you feel, that is his mother. A child will become confused and be mentally and emotionally damaged when the parents bad mouth each other. If the ex bad mouths you, there is nothing you can do for it, but again be the bigger person. Your son will learn from the experience and determine his own opinion of each of you by the relationship he has with you both. Be strong, you've certainly a rocky road ahead of you, but it will be worth it in the end if you do things this way. Good luck to you.
153869
I am a parent but I only have six years experience.  Still, you need to kick his little a** out.  I know he is your kid, but dang.  He is taking you for granted, you need to teach him how to take care of himself.  What is he going to do when you aren't there?
1080740
Oh MY GOSH!! That really makes my skin crawl, a son gives his mother his paycheck to pay her bills and SHE ACTUALLY TOOK IT!!! You need to be mad at both of them!!! And you need to remind him that HE has a family to provide for and that even though it is important for him to be there for his mom---THE KIDS AND YOU COME FIRST!! Whats NEXT?? Is he gonna let her come and live with you or will you be moving in with her because you got evicted because of this? Message me if you want to vent...I feel your pain.
229529
Just tell him that you don't like him. It doesn't matter that his parents are the landlord, they can't kick you out just because you don't like their son, they need a legitimate reason.
203699
get someone you trust to watch the child on the day you are to be out and don't leave until you are arrested. sounds nuts i know, but if you believe you are in the right then the courts need to see it. don't be bullied because you are a single mom. defend yourself and your 'rights' as you would defend your child and his/her 'rights'. have some of your friends watch the house and once you are arrested your friends trash the place. it will end up costing the l.l. more than the 2 or3 months rent he lost.\n\nmy ex's x-wife did this (not leaving) and ended staying free for 6 months (and a couple of court datees), but in that time she was able to save enough for down payment on a house.
978027
Get a lawyer - it's your only hope.  And why did you send your child away?  And it's up to his guardians (father and step-mom) to decide who best to be able to contact the child.  Did you do something to upset them this much?  Or to the child?  Seems to me like there's info here that's missing.  If it's due to you not being able to afford to keep him home, you should have tried harder.  I have 2 children, and never would I ever consider sending them away, to their father's or anywhere else in this world.  I have worked 2 jobs for 10 years to make a life for them, and I spend as much time with them as possible.
735520
you need to really explain how devastated you are about him moving to your parents. your parents should be more understanding, but they might just have your best interest in mind? why would they oppose from having your friend over to YOUR house? is this friend a bad influence or something? well, try & that is all you can do. it is hard to get used to people moving away, but time will help. i suggest talking on the phone will help as well.
833949
This: "What should I do if he again makes up with his ex?" question is tough one, though the fact is that you CAN compete with the mom, yes, because the've probably conserved the respect to each other, but the love is that is already gone and you have this advantage on your side.\n\nI have an advise for you concerning the kid. The children, especially if they are much younger have unfallable  ability to evaluate man's personality- they are pure and see the world with an objective eye. So if you want (and you should) to get along with the kid, be yourself, don't try to hard, no pretences, no sweet wordings just for the sake of it. \n\nJust enjoy what you have together and think of the potential problems when they actually turn into a real ones:)
646735
Has he left before and came back?  Then You have to worry.  If He has been violent before, pack some things and You and Your Mom get out.  You know How intense He has been in the past, and what He may or may not have done, before that You need to be concerned about.  Just go to Your Mom and talk to Her, calm Her down, tell Her You are in this together.  If He has been abusive He may have made her think she can't make it without Him.  If You pray, get on Your knees and Pray with Her, that all will be OK, and that the two of You will be Safe, and You Both will make it fine, together.  My heart is with You, no one should have to go through this, especially a Child.  God Bless, and Best Wishes
802331
Explain nothing to your son until you have sought advice from your attorney.\nHe is too little to understand what's going on and doesn't need to be but in the middle\nKids usually cope better in these situation then the adults do\nYour ex has never paid child support and would have to prove he his able to care for a child he doesn't even know let him spend the money with a lawyer to find out. Maybe when he knows he is responsible for all the back payments he might decide not to see the child
1095637
The answer is really simple. I myself has just gone thru this. You Must submit to him in writing that you are moving to another state(if it's over 100 miles) and is taking the child with you. he has 30 days to respond by taking you to  court. if he does take you to court, be prepard to give concessions such as you will drive your son for visits with his dad, etc. another concession to give him equal custody (joint) as he would have a more say so in how the child is raised. this case law is from louisiana so the law differs from state to state as far as moving out of state. best to research the subject by going to your local library where they have law books and should help you to know exactly where you stand. Hope this helps
263510
Give him written notice that his rental agreement is being terminated.  You'll have to give him at leat 30 days to move out.  He's a parent so there's no excuse for him to not take care of his own family.  If he wants to accuse you of abuse it'll most likely be dismissed but if there's any suspicion the agency will require him to get the child out of the household, so that'd be a bad move on his part.\n\nGood luck.  I say just set a date that he has to be gone by, and don't back down.
313145
darlin', you remind him of the son he should have had but he's got problem children instead. Not your fault but he's too immature not to take it out on you. \n\nHe probably didn't want you to move in but said so to keep the peace with your mom. You're coming between them whether you want to or not. Sounds like it's a party of 3.\n\nIf i were as miserable as you sound, i'd get a loan and get my own place. Find a roomie, boarding house. DO WHATEVER IT TAKES. Your mental health is at stake, here. Get out; you'll realize it's worth the cost.
176558
Talk to a lawyer NOW about this.But please, by all means, unless the child is in danger, please do not try to keep the child from the mother. She's in re-hab for 2 reasons. She screwed up, and is trying to fix her problem. it takes courage to stay there, if not a court order!! Give her the chance to be a good mom. if you take a baby away from a mom, there is all to often hopelessness, and the feeling that there is no reason to better yourself. A child can make you want to better yourself.\nLike I said, talk with a lawyer about your options. This is your baby, too. \nYou want to do something good for your baby!! Try sticking it out with the mom.
87374
In most cases involving minor's counsel, this is an attorney appointed by the Court to represent the child's interests and paid for by the parents.  Unless there is a hotly contested custody hearing, the court usually won't appoint one.  Of course, the exact laws and policies on will vary vary by state.\n\nIf your son wants to come live with you, talk it over with your ex.  You might be able to work something out.  If your ex won't agree, you will need to file a motion for a change of custody and prove to the court that it is in the child's best interest to live with you now.
936601
When I left my first husband, he chose to punish me by refusing to visit our son. Our son is 22 and his dad hasn't seen him since he was 18 months old. You can't force the dad to suddenly becaome a good person when he isn't, but you can affect your son psychologically by how you deal with it.  I guarantee your son doesn't care about the paperwork. If there is a man who is treating him like a son, that's good enough for a healthy self-image. Even if there isn't, you can keep him healthy if you keep a healthy attitude yourself. Be very careful that signing over parental rights isn't about YOU punishing your ex.