how do i help someone who has been told she is fat all her life and is has anorexia?
354709
well you could her by encourging her that she isnt fat but that wont do much,the only thing that will really help is when she believes that she isnt fat.Good Luck
173987
I am sure that it is important to you that your friend has been able to trust you, so you probably do not want to share her secret and betray that trust.  But anorexia is a very dangerous thing and she will need help that you are not qualified to give her and it is imperative that she receive treatment.  I do not know the extent of her condition, so it could be that she has not suffered significant physical damage yet (hopefully this is the case!).  But even so, she will need treatment, even if it is only counseling, to help her break the cycle and learn how to control her disease.  Try encouraging her to tell a parent, a family member or a doctor.  You could offer to go with her if that would help her feel more secure and if you feel able to help support her as a friend.  If she continues to refuse, however, eventually you must tell someone who can intercede.  Betraying her trust is not nearly as bad as allowing her to destroy her body and possibly kill herself.  You could try contacting the eating disorders hotline at 800-227-4785 for additional advice and support.  Good luck...
715825
First and foremost realize that she doesn't have an eating disorder if what your saying is true. What she has is self esteem issues because she is a little bit overweight. Eating salt will only dehydrate you and only SOMETIMES limiting your caloric intake will actually make you gain weight because your body will go into "starvation mode" and store all food that you take in as fat. Your friend however seems to have the mind set-up of someone that could really develop an eating disorder. Tell her she's pretty and that if she really wants to lose weight plan it as a long term goal for HERSELF not so she can be popular, have a boyfriend etc. and most importantly tell her to talk to her parents or a school nurse or doctor to help her plan her diet and exercise regimen.
114765
Yeah, I've had an eating disorder for 6 years, i'm just now getting help/recovery. Some are just naturally thin, others are suffering from anorexia nervosa. They're in the grocery store because they're planning their daily ritual "binge and purge" session. It's such a chilling thought that people suffering from anorexia would actually compare themselves to other anorexics, it becomes an endless competition. Anorexia, like all eating disorders (the obesity epidemic as well) is the worst form of self torture in my opinion.
413966
anorexics see themselves as fat when they can be 100 pounds.\nand ya. how to be an anorexic. just dont eat at all. or be bulimic and make yourself puke
363017
You can't, she has to want to gain weight and then ask for your help. However if she is getting too thin maybe you should speak to her about it, make sure she is okay as stress and anxiety can make you lose weight.
841006
My sweetheart is in the same shoes but since i met him that way and began dating him that way I have accepted it but YES, it is the good thing to do to try and help the ones you love.  HOWEVER, overweight people are extremely sensitive about their weight and are very conscious indeed.  They are sensitive to people's piercing stares and inconsiderate comments.  Before you say anything, you must be aware of this sensitivity and DO NOT USE THE WORD FAT.  Try starting the conversation like "name of friend here, you have been a great friend to me and i really care about you.  I hope i have you in my life as a friend for a long time.  There is something that I am concerned about and wanted to talk with you about it though.  I noticed that you've put on some weight since college started...is everything ok...I think you are a beautiful person just the way you are and this has NOTHING TO DO with your LOOKS, but I am worried about your HEALTH.  I just want us to be friends for a long time to come.....is there anything I can do to help you?..."  Be supportive of her and let her know you are just trying o help.
417575
hmmm...she knows she is fat already. She might not want to talk about it but she is aware. The real question is why? \n\nCertainly take her to the gym, only eat healthy foods when you are with her but the best thing might be to be a friend and help her discover why she has let herself go....\n\nSometimes being heavy is in your DNA--and sometimes its in your emotional DNA.
107228
Ok so lets be realistic here NOONE is perfect and most people find it very difficult to admit when they are wrong. I had a friend tell me something once that I wont easily forget, he said "everyone has a weakness and you can use that for your benefit". After that I saw things differently. Not that Im taking advantage of them but knowing they are human too and being able to look for and find it helped my esteem cause suddenly we were all on the same playing field. now I dont need that to know im a good person and i dont take others as personally anymore either.\n\nThe best part was poking a little fun at my "perfectly skinny friend" who always had a better than me attitude about weight (not that im fat) But i realized she is quite flat chested and it does bother her a bit and that cut her down to size. we are better friends now than ever.\n\nI just thought of something else. If some one says something that bothers you sometimes it helps to repeat it back to them in thier own words. "so your saying....." this creates a little 'yes' in thier mind and builds rapport between you. It also lets him hear himself and think about what he has said.
299495
well first you need to know how to spell it. anorexia.\nthen you need to see a doctor, and realize that the people who tell you to eat are telling you that bc they love and care about you.
275962
i wish that people would stop and think about everything that they are losing out on just because they think they are fat. i have been fat my whole life. i used to dread meeting new people because i was afraid of what they were thinking of me, now i could care less. there are way way bigger people in this world out there then 150 pounds. if you came up to me in person and said that you think you are fat i would laugh in your face. ill tell you what, you want me to send you a picture of some of my family members? i have an aunt that is close to 400 pound. and a cousin that is 330. and i aint no skinny minny myself. what you have to do is except yourself for what and who you are. if you dont like it then you should cut back on calories or lose it the right way because the ways that you are trying will work and then you will gain all of the weight back. and my mother used to be bulimic--she had dentures by age 24.
894914
Yes, she will lose weight. And muscle tissue and brain functionality,strength and endurance. She is dangerously below what she needs in a day (usually 1200-1600 calories are recommended for those who are extremely overweight). Sounds like she may need to seek counseling because if she sees something different than what really exists when she looks in the mirror, then her mind's eye needs to be reprogrammed. These are often beginning signs of anorexia and bulimia. Encourage her to talk to a counselor. She is in danger of harming herself by doing these things. This is not the time to keep your thoughts to yourself. If necessary, ask for help from a trusted adult to intervene. She may get mad at you, but it's worth it to save her life. Be encouraged.
48313
So she's not perfect....are you? If you want her to do something about her weight and you don't want to upset her there is only one way that I know of to do it. You don't tell her to lose weight. You could invite her to work out with you. Take walks together, go to the gym, or whatever works. If you have trouble getting her to do that then you should just simply say that healthy people should live longer lifes and you want to make sure that you are both around. Just make sure that you do the work too.
374385
Bring it up in conversation. Let her know you are concerned about her without accusing her of anything. Tell her how much you love her and how you don't want her to see her hurt herself. If she does have an eating problem (which she may not), she probably has low self-confidence and it will help her to know that someone cares about her no matter what happens. Eating disorders are serious, so keep an eye on her. If you get concerned, don't hesitate to tell a teacher or one of your or her parents. She may be mad, but she will come to see that you were just trying to help her, and by telling someone she will be able to get the help she needs. Just please be sure she does have a problem before you do tell someone. Maybe something else is going on besides an eating disorder. Just talk to her. Good luck. Let me know if you need anything.
313453
There is a mental state that anorexics work themselves into.  So before you "weigh 80 pounds soaking wet"  there is an issue there that you are recognizing and wanting to address- and that's great!  If your mindset is, "I'm such a piece of **** that I don't deserve to eat," or "No one will love me unless I'm perfect," or "I need to control something in my life because everything else is so out of control," then these are attitudes that need to be fixed- pronto! You are fearfully and wonderfully made, you are loved by God, you have not been forgotten and the Word says that "You are the apple of His eye" (psalm 17:8) and Psalm 45:11 says the king is ENTHRALLED by your beauty..."  I got through my problems through God's grace, and you can too.  Email me or IM me if you need to talk more.
136406
She has a good friend. You're kind of in an awckward position to help an overweight friend. If you try to help her to get thinner, she might end up resenting you because she'll think you don't like her.\nRemember that being fat is not a body problem, it's an emotional problem. What you can help her the most is in raising her self-esteem while she remains fat. Tell her "it's Ok to be fat". Well, not in those words. Say "don't worry about what people say, people are very judgmental, and they don't understand that women have issues". Tell her "I don't think you hate your body because you're overweight, I think you have had emotions you haven't resolved yet". That sounds like psychobabble but it's pretty close to reality. You can probably find a better way to say it.\nIf you're just wishing she was thinner, and she's bringing you down emotionally, you need to think of yourself first, also. You might get to a point where you can't take it, and that is OK, you can take a break too.
972251
Yes, do you see any signs of anorexia? I have a friend that is very skinny but she has a VERY HIGH metabolism. Do you notice any loss in appiette? How about hair loss? Does she ever talk about how"fat" she looks? If so I would talk to her mom or convince her to see a doctor!