my husband is really a not romantic guy.he he finished sexin 30second to2minutes.is this a disorder.what i do?
350927
No, he's suffering from "inconsideration". He gets his and it's done for him. If you hadn't said "husband" i would have suggested you drop him like a bad habit. But since you're married, sit him down and in a non-accusatory tone tell him how it makes you feel. Tell him you'd like to enjoy sex too. Tell him Men are like ovens, they heat up quick. Women are like crock pots, the take some time to heat up. He needs to be attentive to your needs. He needs to give you a little foreplay. He needs to find out what you like and enjoy and then give it to you. Or you might want to consider not "giving it" to him until he gets a clue. Good luck.
507149
Perhaps something is bothering him, or he doesn't feel well. Try wearing something revealing or surprise him by posing provocatively on the bed when you suspect he will be going in the bedroom. Try having "encounters" at different hours than usual, or in diff places. Avoid ruts. Talk dirty to him.\n\nHe sounds like a lucky guy.\n\ngood luck ;-)
171549
I personally don't think that you should set an exact time frame tell him that you would enjoy sex if it were more sparatic, that if you get it less you will enjoy it more..... just have sex when you feel like it.... don't limit yourself to once every two weeks and don't feel that you have to once every two weeks if you don't want to
1064999
first i would get him medically checked to make sure he has no health problems - like diabetes, cardiovascular etc and ensure he has normal hormone levels \n\nsecond how stressful is his life, how tired is he?  everyone struggles to feel sexy when they are stressed and chronically tired - maybe a long holiday somewhere relaxing \n\nthrid - visual visual and visual - guys are visual cretaures use that to your advantage - lots of sneeky sexy peeks, lingerie and lots of drawn out teasing foreplay \n\nfourth - for some people once a month is normal libido - he might be one of those \n\n\nfifth - if all else fails give him a quick kick to the b*lls - they will re focus his attention to his genitals!
88724
Even if a guy's wife is Ms. Universe, he cant handle sex all time with full of passion. Come on, its also an exercise, where you hard work. Men need rest. So, wait for that. You also shouldnt post such a question online. Try to understand human feelings. Dont think alien.
105783
sure sounds like a drinking problem's probably the 'real' problem. He sounds inhibited, and the drinking at least for a time lowers his fears, nervousness, insecurity, inhibition, guilt or whatever levels ... addictive behavior...do you honestly believe that your honest feelings are at fault? Sounds difficult, complicated...and, perhaps, getting worse. Whether he's having 'commitment phobias' or just expecting you to do as he says, or whatever he's perhaps not discussing, he sounds 'out of control', but he wants to 'be in charge'...something in him might be feeling ashamed, low self-esteem/image, and, he's demanding that you follow his routine, with implied not much room for spontaneity, let alone you feeling love(-d), safe (at peace, unperturbed) and valued -- but, how can he value you, if he's troubled about who he is -- or, why else drink/escape, and then try to use sex with such timing, like drunk clockwork. It sounds like your feelings are good, clear, trying to communicate...your feelings are innocent, your true companions/guides...BEST WISHES...in finding (out) your way(-s)
1177281
Is he a young man?\n\nSounds like it... I suggest working with him to increase his "ride" time.   The grab method... or some "detain" cream... or perhaps wearing a condom sometimes helps.\n\nYou must have some "sugar walls" there babe!!!  hehehe\n\nbut seriously... if this is a problem for you... as it seems it should be... work with him.   You both will enjoy it more!
181233
You can't. And I would imagine he's not very much fun in bed either. Tell him to go see a doctor.
899451
So you only married him for the sex ... how very shallow of you .... and I see you're very modest as well.\nMaybe it's your attitude thats causing him to falter ... the more you pressure him the les frequent you're gonna get it .... so sure divorce him and go find youself another stud until you wear him out .... \nMight do hubby good to be able to relax and not be pressured
652242
I do not think there is any such thing as "normal" in regards to this question. Each couple will have their own desires, their own wants, needs, urges and motivations. Sex is tied to emotions and other factors besides two willing bodies. In other words, it may seem normal for your husband to want sex more often, but if his mind is on work, worries, children, responsibilities etc. He may not be able to perform as well or as eagerly as he would without the stress issues.  There are also medications that can affect one's desire (or lack of desire) so all of these kind of intricacies in your OWN relationship may make what is "normal" very different for each couple. \n\nMy husband and I did not get married until we were older (late 30s for me, early 40s for him), and I must admit that the first two years was a lot hotter than the last 8 have been, but I have had a surgery on my back, and my husband has had some health problems that have had a profound effect on our sex lives. The part that really matters is that we are both happy and satisfied (not only with the sex, but with each other)!  We were friends before we were lovers, and if for some reason one day one of us is no longer able to have sex at all, I don't think either one of us would walk away from the other because of it!\n\nI guess it's a lot more important if you are young, and maybe there are ways that you could approach and talk to your husband if you want to know if HE is happy, and if YOU are not happy...then I think you should try talking this over with your husband (PRIVATELY) before you are tempted to invite others into your bed!  It may be that you could spice things up a bit to make the package more appealing. If you could just offer him a massage and if he relaxes so much that he goes to sleep, then let him sleep. Let him know that you are not doing nice things just for the purpose of seducing him. Maybe try some feminine lingerie, and instead of wearing your fuzzy pink bunny slippers and terry cloth bathrobe, put on something that will remind him that you are all HIS and that he is a very lucky man. :)  \n\nIf you have changed in weight or attitude since you got married maybe he would appreciate your efforts to improve yourself. So if you can be more helpful, less demanding and show him that you really do want him to be more attentive or less attentive (which ever the case)...Perhaps your feelings will seem more important to him. \n\nBefore you feel tempted to cheat or anything like that or if you are suspicious that he is cheating, ask him to go with you to a marriage counselor, or if you both are invested in a church, you may consider asking the Pastor, Priest or Reverend for "couple's counseling".  If you go to counseling, be honest about your feelings, and encourage your husband to open up too. If there are things in your marriage (like sex) that are not satisfying to both of you, then maybe you could find ways to make them more balanced through work and compromise. Sometimes we cannot always have things as we always dreamed they should be. There is NOTHING wrong with sharing those dreams with your spouse, so that both of you can work towards a happier marriage that is mutually gratifying in many many ways!\n\nGood luck, what is "normal" is what works for you and your husband!
570640
If he has a pulse and is sexually active he is probably masturbating.  Look you have to get over it if you have a problem with it, if you can't be mature and just accept it then maybe you shouldn't be getting involved with anyone.  The only gesture I can think of is breathing.
585105
it sounds like he has excitement when in the bedroom but it's a good thing for you. Just tell him how you like it. but he is the only one who actually knows if he had sex before you or not. I would think that he's been waiting for you and now he has you so he can't help himselve and goes faster and longer. i wish you the best of luck. i think it would be best to get a guys point of view because they would now.
266901
just being straight up would be best.\n\ni have to read between the lines, not many details...\n\nit seems like there could be several causes... hang-ups, priorities, miscommunication, not being in the mood, fear of the unknown, performance anxiety, him not knowing your boundaries...\n\ntell your hubby how you feel, and let him know what you had in mind, and let him know you REALLY want it, there will be no pressure, no judgment, and let him know he can't screw it up... even if it doesn't work right the first time, you want to try something new for excitement.
159812
I'm a guy and I have affairs often. But don't judge me just yet. I never dreamed of having an affair on my wife. We were in love. We did things together. We laughed together. \nThen she started shying away from love making. She eventually lost her libido to the point that she can go without it for months. She used to say she almost married me because of the sex was so great. Now she's a stranger. \nSo I ask you. Are you doing something to push him into another bed? Don't believe the BS that both sexes have the same drives. Most guys need to ejaculate everyday and some more than that. If you aren't taking care of that, then the temptation of some strange will be too strong for him to resist. Also if there is something that he really wants to do sexually but you are too much of a prude to give it to him, guess what? He's getting someone else to give it to him. Right or wrong, that's the way men are. We are primal..you are emotional. Sex is love to us. Believe it. \nI also know that there are men who will stray no matter what there situation is. If that's your case, and you really searched your soul for that answer, then leave him as he will never change. I stay in this marriage for the kids. Unless there is abuse involved, I have seen a lot of evidence that a bad marriage is better for children than to not have one of their parents. Good luck!
587873
He clearly likes more than a quickie, if this is a problem, pleasure yourself until he finds time to enjoy you!  Good luck.
84606
I've noticed that my husband also orgasms quicker when we don't have sex frequently. I suppose a part of it is the underlying excitement in your mind. I find sex to be better and more exciting when it's not a daily thing, perhaps that's why.
1042710
Maybe he freaked out because he's not emotionally attached to you.  And you are bringing the emotional equation into the "casual sex" relationship.  He clearly doesn't want to be emotionally attached to you, because you are simply the "sex" he's not getting at home.\n\nHe will never leave his wife.  \n\nWhat are you doing?  What would your husband say?\n\nRelationships are not kleenex, you don't toss them out when things get soggy.  There are real emotions and people involved here.  How can you lie to your husband every day that you keep this secret from him.\n\nLike it or not.  He's pulling away because of the "emotional" attachment you are bringing to the "sex only" relationship.\n\nHe has a relationship, and that's at home.  He only wants sex from you.  As long as you give it, he will take it.\n\nAnd that's a Man, in a nutshell.