How do I tell my mom i'm marrying the guy she doesnt think I'm with anymore?
337873
Tell her now the longer you wait the more hurtful it will be to her, as much as she may not care for your man she needs to understand that it is your life and your choice you are an adult that went to college and are about to join the navy she should see that you have a good head on your shoulders with that.  you might be surprised by her reaction anyway she might just tell you she thinks its a mistake but it is yours to make and support you\n\nanyway good luck to you in your marriage and navial career
1072449
tell him exactly what you just said, i see no offense in that. and as a compromise, just tell him that you are willing to live close to her, so he can check up on her as often as he wants to. but i think that especially as newlyweds, you will need your time alone. best of luck. and by the way, most guys are mommas boys (im one too) so dont expect him to let go of his mother, i doubt that will happen, but you should see the good in that. because most guys that love and respect their mothers, tend to treat their wives the same way.
832587
Tell her; and stand firm in your resolve to wait until you are married.  It is too bad that you had to learn the hard way that alcohol and casual sex are not all they are cracked up to be.  It sounds like you are basically a good girl.  Tell your mom, she will help you get through this.
872293
Well if thinks are going to fast for you, you should definitely tell her carefully before things get out of hand and it slips out. Maybe next time she brings up marriage you could nicely just say something like "We've got tonnes of time for that later, lets take things slow."\nor\n"Aww c'mon honey slow down"\nThen you could always hug her or kiss her lightly afterwards to reassure that you're not rejecting her.
785749
ok, so mum is being manipulative as all get out!  \nthis is your day, your wedding, your life.  get on with it!  i speak from experience.  my mother pulled the same crap - do it my way or else!  well i gave in to her a lot and almost lost my fiance, [now husband], over it all.  thank god i woke up and stood up to her.   \nas calmly as you can reassure her she will always have a place in your life, and you want her to be part of your life, but it is your life.  \ntell her you want her at the wedding but will respect her decision if she chooses not to come. \nand tell your sister the same thing.  don't let them turn it into a discussion - you are telling them how its going to be and then stick with it.  \ngood luck kiddo, stay strong and marry your man the way you want to do it.  its your day, your life, your happiness - your family needs to realize that.
360585
There is not much you can do. she is in love with the man and she is an adult so your parents unfortunately don't have much to say and should  support her in whatever choice it is that she chooses to make\n\nYour sister evidentally sees something in him that you cannot see and that is what counts. YOUR SISTER is the one that is marrying the guy and she knows him better than anyone else does. She is following her own heart and that is what counts\n\nLove your sister and support her. \nLet her make her own choice and if it is a bad choice and she gets hurt, then show her support and do what you can to comfort her. \n\nFor now, let her make her own choice.
87704
Hi! If you want to do the good thing, tell your mother. Tell her all the FACTS, don't tell her that you believe him because you love him, that you think that he will change, or that kind of stuff. Just keep straight to the facts. If she asks you for your opinion, go for it, tell her what you think.\n\nIf you go to her in a fact/positive/non BLINDED way, she might respect your opinion, at last, you'll have more chance of getting your point of view of the situation. It will also be helpfull to tell your mother how you are dealing or going to deal with the situation. Also, share with her the letters. She'll see that you are honoring her, respecting her, and that you are looking for a wise answer for this situation. Good luck.
1014877
The easiest way to tell your parents is to simply sit down and ask to have an adult conversation with them. It's best not to sugar coat anything, just keep it real. Tell them you have a boyfriend and it might be nice if you tell them that you would really like them to meet him and get to know him. That way they feel like they are involved in your life. Whatever you do don't put it off any longer because the longer you wait the worse it will be when you tell them.
800731
I have had plenty of male friends who have been through this before. Before the two of you call it quits you should have a nice dinner (preferably at home becuase it might get emotional) to just talk...tell her that you just want to start over. Pretend this dinner is your first date, use it as a way to rekindle what you had and find out why you guys decided to get married. Also explain the way you feel and encourage her to do the same.
689625
I think I would find another time to introduce your partner to your step mom. It is mothers day, and not the right time to spring something like this on her. You did say that your step mom doesn't like the fact that you are a bisexual woman. You didn't say how the rest of your relationship with her goes. \n\n Make the day about your step mom, and set aside another day entirely where you can slowly start to integrate your partner into the relationship you have with your step mom. I am all about the two of them meeting, getting to know eachother....because this will help your step mom see that you are simply in love..and it doesn't matter with what sex. However, it would be very disrespectful to take her to your step moms on mothers day. And your step mom would be fully in her rights to be upset. Pick your battles and you'll have an easier time fighting them.
802108
Well, you need to ask yourself how you got into your current situation in the first place....  Did you "find out" you were gay AFTER getting engaged?  Did you have a gay affair and determined that was what you really wanted?  Once you answer this, then you go to step two.  You HAVE to tell her.  Unless of course, you want to spend the rest of your life living a lie, and not being able to be true to yourself [and her].  You will regret getting married and not being able to have your male companionship if you go forward.  Be strong and sincere.  Talk to her like a close friend and, yes, it may turn out bad, but in the long run it could be worse.
677284
Maybe you mom's trust issues are not with you but with your boyfriend. Also, at 16 you are starting to find out who you really are.  If you start to get involved with someone now, that could harm your ability to figure out who you are and what you believe in. If you have not done this yet, you may want to ask your mom why she does not want you to date at this time and when she thinks it would be a good time for you to start dating.  It is not good to ask these questions in the middle of an argument, but ask your mom if you could talk to her when you are both calm.  Your mom may have a lot of valuable insight for you, or she may have some irrational fears. You will never find out unless you two can sit down and communicate. Good luck.
571393
TELL THEM!!!\nit screws up your whole relationship if you don't.
196461
Tell her you're in love and that you think this is what's right for you. Be an adult about it and show her that you're serious about it. She's your mother, she'll understand in time, but it will probably be big shock at first.
1051188
Mmmm. You'll definitely have to tell your father.\n\nWhy? Because of your sister. If you mother continues with that relationship, she will soon got married with that other guy, or invite him to stay @ home, etc., and that will be a total stranger in your house, which can go over your little sister.\n\nYour mother is not correct in telling you that you have no right to interfere with her life; BUFF!! WRONG!!! Until you get married and have your own place, until your sister got married or have her own place, you MUST interfere in your mother's life, because all her decisions will have consequences on you, your sister, and your father also.\n\nGo and tell your father, for real, get prepared, because cloudy/dark days will come by... Good luck!
991171
Wow. That sounds a lot like my mother. She married my stepdad without telling me and they werent together that long either. My stepdad can be a real jerk and he seems to be real strict and uptight.\nHave you tried talking to your mother about how you feel and the things that have happened? You could tell your mother "Mom, I love you and I need to talk to you about how Im feeling towards (his name here)" Let her know what you've observed and how you feel. I know that it hurts a lot because here is a divorce and you had to adjust to that and everything else in your life and then your mom does this major thing like getting married without any preparation on your part and its hurtful because its a big change in your life and you are blind sided. If you need someone to talk to you can email me Ive been through this and Im still healing from it and it was almost 5 years ago. Hang in there!\nsweetieliz@gmail.com
835072
I can see your confusion and your concern but the only thing you can do is wait it out and be there for her. You cannot control your mother any more than you can control the weather. She may be so eager to find love again and get involved with a man that at the first chance she jumps all over it and becomes obsessed. You are awesome for being such a caring son but your mom has to see it on her own. If she is this far gone in love with this guy then she won't see things your way no matter what you say and if you say anything to her she may even get angry with you. Good Luck and I hope this helps!!