Any body know any GOOD BUSH jokes. if so share them please. After all this country needs a good laugh.?
354536
George & Laura Bush and Dick Cheney are flying to Texas in Air Force One when Ole' W reaches into his pocket, pulls out a hundred dollar bill and says, "If I threw this out the window right now I could make one person very happy."\n\nCheney thinks about it for a minute, then reaches in his pocket, pulls out ten ten dollar bills, and says, "I could throw these out the window right now and make ten people very happy."\n\nLaura thinks about this for a second, reaches into her pocket and pulls out a hundred one dollar bills and says, "I could throw these out the window right now and make a hundred people very happy."\n\nThe pilot thinks about it for a second, turns to his co-pilot and says, "I could throw three people outta the window and make 200 million people happy!"
1106639
Sure.\n\nHe is always good for a laugh.\n\n\nThe Post Turtle\n \nWhile suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year-old Texas rancher, whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. \n\nEventually, the topic got around to former Texas Governor George W. Bush and his elevation to the White House.\n\nThe old Texan said, "Well, ya know, Bush is a 'post turtle'."\n\nNot being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a 'post turtle' was.\n\nThe old rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a\nturtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle." \n\nThe old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain, "You know, he didn't get there\nby himself, he doesn't belong there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up there, and you just want to help the dumb s_h_i_t get down!"
354404
While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people. \n\nBush asks how she knows if they're intelligent. \n\n"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate." \n\nBush watches as the Queen phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question: your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?" \n\nTony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am." \n\n"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?" \n\nBush nods: "Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!" \n\nBush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. Bush summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me." \n\n"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?" \n\nBush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?" \n\nHelms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?" \n\nBush agrees, and Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem. \n\n"Now lookee here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?" \n\nPowell answers immediately, "It's me, of course." \n\nMuch relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!" \n\nAnd Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, you dumb sh*t, it's Tony Blair!"
131089
*laughs* yeah, he better watch out for...."THE CHENEY OF TERROR". \n\n"arrrrg, i will shoot your head off !!!", says Cheney\n"You little basterd, I will get you first" says Bush *in a Texas accent of coarse*\n"You got a problem with me? HUh? Huh?" says Cheney\n"Yes I DO", says Bush\n"what?...*Cheney shoots Bush fast*, says Cheney\n"...................", says Bush\n"HA HA HAAAA" says Cheney\n....see, he will...he will *laughs*
1144508
Political Heaven Joke\n\nAl Gore and Bill & Hillary Clinton go to Heaven.\n \nGod addresses Al first. "Al, what do you believe  in?"\n     \nAl replies, "Well, I believe I won that election, but that it was your will that I did not serve. \nAnd I've come to understand that now."\n\nGod thinks for a second and says, "Okay, very good.  Come and sit at my left."\n\nGod then addresses Bill. "Bill, what do you believe in?"\n\nBill replies, "I believe in forgiveness. I've  sinned, but I've never held a grudge against my fellow man, \nand I hope no grudges are held against me."\n\nGod thinks for a second and says, "You are forgiven, my son. Come and sit at my right."\n\nThen God addresses Hillary. "Hillary, what do you believe in?"\n\nHillary replies, "I believe you're in my chair."\n\n\nThe Post Turtle \n\nWhile suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year-old Texas rancher, whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. \n\nEventually, the topic got around to former Texas Governor George W. Bush and his elevation to the White House.\n\nThe old Texan said, "Well, ya know, Bush is a 'post turtle'."\n\nNot being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a 'post turtle' was.\n\nThe old rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a\nturtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle." \n\nThe old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain, "You know, he didn't get there\nby himself, he doesn't belong there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up there, and you just want to help the dumb s_h_i_t get down!"
977574
LOVED the joke.  Haven't heard (or read) such a funny joke is ages!!!
632231
Someone in my class told me this. \nI'm sorry if you support Bush but............anyways.\n\nBush was stranded on an island and a genie came to him and said,"You have two wishes. What is your first wish?" Bush said,"I wish I was back in the White House." Poof...He was in the White House. The genie said," What is your second wish?" Then Bush said," I Wish my people were happy." Poof...He was back at the island.
738321
it wasn't that bad, some people just dont know how to take a joke (republicans). Don't worry, it gave us a bit of comic relief!
523101
He is not there to be "funny" unfortunately. And what he is there to do, he has screwed up well beyond repair. The funniest thing about him though is his struggle to get simple words formed into a sentence. For my fellow Americans who think Clinton was the biggest joke, you must admit that besides getting a extra marital piece on the side (which they all do anyway) the country was far better off.
923847
LMFAO great jokes!!! Love your sense of humor it is wonderful!!
847459
LOL that was a good one and for once it wasn't to long to read sometimes i can never be bothered to finish the joke coz there so long!\nThanks for the laugh xx
108887
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Thanks I needed a good laugh.
107870
Yes, someone knows one or more funny jokes.  http://answers.yahoo.com/dir/;_ylt=ArnzjuRlqSbxSa5yiGyF8SL4y6IX?link=list&sid=396546041
137688
Who was that begging us to be nice to this guy? Wake up lady! This is the United States of America! If you are stupid, you get criticized. Politics is a tough business. He knew that going in. Bush aint a crackhead though. The other writer was correct. He is a dry drunk. I think he is a little coked out too which explains is absolute inability to speak coherently. The guy is President of the US and cant even speak well publicly. What is that? All he can do is read or spew the same ole rehearsed talking points. I think he needs another vacation.
877101
LOL.  I liked it.  Best joke I've heard all day. :)  Thanks for cheering me up, I had a shitty day so far.
809204
I actually got that one! LOLLOLLOLLOLLOL!!!!! Can you e-mail some other jokes to me like that one? my address is dogloverkm@yahoo.com   thanks!
216059
AM I FUNNY ENOUGH? HOPE SO...\n\n1\n\nFresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\n2\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\n\n3\n\nThe mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's \nhouse. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her \ndaughter-in-law standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" she asked.\n\n"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the \ndaughter-in-law \nanswered.\n\n"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.\n\n"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.\n\n"Love dress? But you're naked!"\n\n"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it \nmakes me \nhappy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home \nfrom \nwork any minute."\n\nThe mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the \nway \nhome she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed, \nshowered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally \nher \nhusband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" he asked.\n\n"This is my love dress" she replied.\n\n"Needs ironing." he said.\n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING