Does any1 knoe any good yo mamma jokes please tell me some?
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yo mamma so fat she irons her pants on the drive way\nYo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller \n\nYo momma so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out. \nYo momma so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon\nYo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight! \n\nYo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning. \n\nYo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
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i don't have all of 'em, but i do have a few funny ones. yo' mama is so fat:\n1. when she was floating in the ocean, spain claimed her as the new world\n 2.when she sat on the rainbow, skittles came out\n3. when i slapped her thigh, i rode the waves and went bye-bye\n\ngo to http://ahajokes.com or http://yomama.com for a complete list
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Yo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon\nYo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.\nYo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!\nJust a few :)
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http://funnies.com/spermcount.htm\n\nlol its funny but i couldnt copy and paste\n\nheres another one\n\nHOW TO IMPRESS \nA WOMAN. \n* Wine her,\n* Dine her,\n* Call her,\n* Hug her,\n* Support her,\n* Hold her,\n* Surprise her,\n* Compliment her,\n* Smile at her,\n* Listen to her,\n* Laugh with her,\n* Cry with her,\n* Romance her,\n* Encourage her,\n* Believe in her,\n* Pray with her,\n* Pray for her,\n* Cuddle with her,\n* Shop with her,\n* Give her jewelry,\n* Buy her flowers,\n* Hold her hand,\n* Write love letters to her,\n* Go to the end of the Earth and back again for her.\nHOW TO IMPRESS \nA MAN\n* Show up naked ... \n* Bring food ... \n* Don't block the TV\n\nthis isnt dirty but i thoght its funny lol\n\nAPPLICATION FOR PERMISSION\nTO DATE MY DAUGHTER\n\nNOTE: THIS APPLICATION WILL BE INCOMPLETE AND REJECTED UNLESS ACCOMPANIED BY A COMPLETE FINANCIAL STATEMENT, WORK HISTORY, LINEAGE, AND CURRENT MEDICAL REPORT FROM YOUR DOCTOR.\n\n1. NAME__________________________...\n\nDATE OF BIRTH___/___/___\n\n\n2.HEIGHT__________________WEIG...\n\n3. SOCIAL SECURITY#______________DRIVERS LIC#_______________\n\n4. BOY SCOUT RANK__________________________...\n\n5. HOME ADDRESS______________CITY/STAT...\n\n6. DO YOU HAVE ONE MALE AND ONE FEMALE PARENT?_______________\nIF NO, PLEASE EXPLAIN_______________________...\n\n7. NUMBER OF YEARS PARENTS MARRIED?____________________\n\n8. DO YOU OWN A VAN?________________MOTORCYCLE...\nTRUCK WITH OVERSIZED TIRES?___________WATERBED?____...\nDO YOU HAVE AN EARRING?____NOSE RING?____BELLY BUTTON RING__\n\n9. IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DOES DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER MEANS TO YOU?__________________________...\n\n10. IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DOES LATE MEAN TO YOU?__________________________...\n\n11. IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DOES ABSTINENCE MEAN TO YOU?__________________________...\n\n12. CHURCH YOU ATTEND?_______________________...\n\n13. WHEN WOULD BE THE BEST TIME TO INTERVIEW YOUR FATHER?_________MOTHER?_______...\n\n14. ANSWER BY FILLING IN THE BLANK. PLEASE ANSWER FREELY, ALL ANSWERS ARE CONFIDENTIAL (THAT MEANS I WON'T TELL ANYONE)\nA. IF I WERE SHOT, THE LAST PLACE ON MY BODY I WOULD WANT WOUNDED IS THE ________________\nB. IF I WERE BEATEN, THE LAST PLACE I WOULD WANT BROKEN IS MY _____________\nC. A WOMAN'S PLACE IS IN THE ______________\nD.. THE ONE THING I HOPE THIS APPLICATION DOESN'T ASK IS _________\nE. WHEN I FIRST MEET A GIRL, THE THING I NOTICE FIRST IS HER ________\n(NOTE: IF THE ANSWERS STARTS WITH A T OR AN A, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES, KEEPING LOW AND RUNNING IN A SERPENTINE FASHION IS ADVISED.)\n\n15. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE IF YOU GROW UP?________________\n\nI SWEAR THAT ALL OF THE INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICA AN TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION,ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.\n\n______________________________...\nSIGNATURE (THAT MEANS YOU SIGN YOUR NAME)\n\nTHANK YOU FOR YOUR INTEREST. PLEASE ALLOW FOUR TO SIX YEARS FOR PROCESSING. YOU WILL BE NOTIFIED IN WRITING IF YOU ARE APPROVED. PLEASE DO NOT CALL OR WRITE (AS IT WILL CAUSE YOU INJURY)
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Yo mamma is so stupid she got hit by a parked car.\n\nYo mamma is so fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out.
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101? I ONLY HAVE MY BEST 3 JOKES...HOPE IT DOESN'T OFFEND U\n\n1\n\nFresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\n2\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\n\n3\n\nThe mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's \nhouse. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her \ndaughter-in-law standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" she asked.\n\n"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the \ndaughter-in-law \nanswered.\n\n"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.\n\n"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.\n\n"Love dress? But you're naked!"\n\n"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it \nmakes me \nhappy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home \nfrom \nwork any minute."\n\nThe mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the \nway \nhome she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed, \nshowered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally \nher \nhusband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" he asked.\n\n"This is my love dress" she replied.\n\n"Needs ironing." he said.\n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
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Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up\n\nYo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"\n\nYo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.\n\nYo mama so fat were in her right now\n\nYo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise\n\nYo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone\n\nYo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors\n\nYo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...\n\nYo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world\n\nYo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy\n\nYo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!\n\nYo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!\n\nYo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"\n\nYo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"\n\nYo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized\n\nYo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway\n\nYo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller\n\nYo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets\n\nYo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th\n\nYo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too\n\nYo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"\n\nYo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!\n\nYo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"\n\nYo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.\n\nYo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.\n\nYo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!\n\nYo mama so fat she's got her own area code!\n\nYo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!\n\nYo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!\n\nYo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!\n\nYo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!\n\nYo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...\n\nYo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.\n\nYo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!\n\nYo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!\n\nYo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!\n\nYo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!\n\nYo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!\n\nYo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.\n\nYo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!\n\nYo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!\n\nYo mama so fat when she bungee jumps she goes straight to hell!\n\nYo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!\n\nYo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!\n\nYo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!\n\n\nYo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes\n\nYo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends\n\nYo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon\n\nYo mama so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read\n\nYo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind\n\nYo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl\n\nYo mama so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!\n\nYo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!\n\nYo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!\n\nYo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
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TRY THESE..........\n\n1\n\nFresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\n2\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\n\n3\n\nThe mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's \nhouse. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her \ndaughter-in-law standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" she asked.\n\n"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the \ndaughter-in-law \nanswered.\n\n"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.\n\n"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.\n\n"Love dress? But you're naked!"\n\n"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it \nmakes me \nhappy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home \nfrom \nwork any minute."\n\nThe mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the \nway \nhome she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed, \nshowered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally \nher \nhusband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" he asked.\n\n"This is my love dress" she replied.\n\n"Needs ironing." he said.\n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
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Is it okay if it isn't yo mama jokes?Becuase I only have one: Yo Mama so poor when she was kicking a can and I asked her, "What 'ja doin'," she answered, "moving"\n\nA man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement. \n\n"Listen," says the Doc, "I have migraines too, and the advice I'm going to give you isn't really anything I learned in medical school, but it's advice that I've gotten from my own experience. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. Then I have my wife sponge me off with the hottest water I can stand, especially around the forehead. This helps a little. Then I get out of the tub, take her into the bedroom, and even if my head is killing me, I force myself to have sex with her. Almost always, the headache is immediately gone. Now, give it a try, and come back and see me in six weeks." \n\nSix weeks later, the patient returns with a big grin. \n\n"Doc! I took your advice and it works! It REALLY WORKS! I've had migraines for 17 years and this is the FIRST time anyone has ever helped me!" \n\n"Well," says the physician, "I'm glad I could help." \n\n"By the way, Doc," the patient adds, "you have a REALLY nice house." \n\nWEIRD FACT OF THE DAY: The largest apple pie ever baked was forty by twenty three feet. \n\nON THIS DAY IN HISTORY: In 1919 1st issue of NY Daily News published. \n\nBORN ON THIS DAY: In 1956 - Chris Isaak (actor: Little Buddha, Silence of the Lambs, Married to the Mob, Twin Peaks; singer, songwriter: Wicked Game, Blue Hotel, LP: Silvertone). \n============================================================================================================================\n\n\n\n So there was an american, a black guy and a mexican that found a genie who granted them each a wish. The black guy asked that he and all of his brothers in America be taken back to their homeland of Africa, so the genie did it. The mexican asked that all of his people in America be brought back to their homes in Mexico, so the genie did that as well. Then the american said: "So you mean to tell me that all of the blacks and mexicans are gone?" and the genie replied "Yeah"; so the american said "Well then i'll have a coke." \n\n ============================================================================================================================\n\nA young man goes into a pharmacy and says to the\npharmacist, "Hello, could you give me condom.\nI'm going\nto my girlfriend's place for dinner and I think\nI may be in\nwith a chance!"\n\nThe pharmacist gives him the condom and the\nyoung man leaves. He soon returns and says, "Give me\nanother condom because my girlfriend's sister is very\ncute too. She always crosses her legs in a\nprovocative manner when she sees me and I think I might\nstrike it lucky there too."\n\nThe pharmacist gives him a second condom and as\nthe boy is leaving he turns back and says,"Go on,\ngive me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is\nstill pretty cute and when she sees me she always\nmakes eyes, and since she invited me for dinner, think\nshe is expecting me to make a move!\n\nDuring dinner, the young man is sitting with his\ngirlfriend on his left, the sister on his right\nand the mum facing him.\n\nWhen the dad gets there, the boy lowers his head\nand starts praying, "Dear Lord, bless this dinner\nand thank you for all you give us."\n\nA minute later the boy is still praying; "Thank\nyou Lord for your kindness."\n\nTen minutes go by and the boy is still praying,\nkeeping his head down.\n\nThe others look at each other surprised and his\ngirlf
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LMFAO great jokes!!! Love your sense of humor it is wonderful!!
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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party! \n\nYo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!! " \n\nYo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!! \n\nYo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled, "HEY, KOOL-AID!" \n\nYo momma fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck. \n\nYo momma is so fat her waist size is equator!\n\nYo momma so fat shes on both side of the family. \n\nYo momma so fat when she walks around in Texas in high heels, she strikes oil! \n\nYo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale! \n\nYo momma so stupid, she studied for a drug test! \n\nYo momma so stupid, she thought, "Wu Tang" was an African orange drink! \n\nYo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl. \n\nYo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved! \n\nYo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order! \n\nYo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone! \n\nYo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
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1\n\nFresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\n2\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\n\n3\n\nThe mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's \nhouse. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her \ndaughter-in-law standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" she asked.\n\n"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the \ndaughter-in-law \nanswered.\n\n"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.\n\n"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.\n\n"Love dress? But you're naked!"\n\n"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it \nmakes me \nhappy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home \nfrom \nwork any minute."\n\nThe mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the \nway \nhome she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed, \nshowered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally \nher \nhusband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" he asked.\n\n"This is my love dress" she replied.\n\n"Needs ironing." he said.\n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
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YO MOMMA SO FAT HER BLOOD TYPE IS RAGU \nYo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party! \n\nYo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!! " \n\nYo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!! \n\nYo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled, "HEY, KOOL-AID!" \n\nYo momma fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck. \n\nYo momma is so fat her waist size is equator! \n\nYo momma so fat she went bungee jumping and went strait to hell! \n\nYo momma so fat shes on both side of the family. \n\nYo momma so fat when she walks around in Texas in high heels, she strikes oil! \n\nYo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale! \n\nYo momma so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he told her to move her fat ole ass over! \n\nYo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it. \n\nYo momma so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up. \n\nYo momma so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction! \n\nYo momma so fat she wakes up in sections! \n\nYo momma so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER! \n\nYo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun! \n\nYo momma so fat she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phone book! \n\nYo momma so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand! \n\nYo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says, "To be continued." \n\nYo momma so fat her nickname is, "DAY-UM!" \n\nYo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. \n\nYo momma so fat we're in her right now. \n\nYo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise. \n\nYo momma so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone. \n\nYo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors. \n\nYo mamma so fat, you have to roll over twice to get off her... \n\nYo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world. \n\nYo momma so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling, "Free Willy!" \n\nYo momma so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop! \n\nYo momma so fat when she has sex, she has to give directions! \n\nYo momma so fat, she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says, "Okay!" \n\nYo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people say, "Taxi!" \n\nYo momma so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized. \n\nYo momma so fat, she got to iron her pants on the driveway. \n\nYo momma so fat I've known her all my life ... and I still haven't seen ALL of her! \n\nYo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller. \n\nYo momma so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets. \n\nYo momma so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th. \n\nYo momma so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too. \n\nYo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear, "Caution! Wide Turn." \n\nYo momma so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE! \n\nYo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it read, "One at a time, please." \n\nYo momma so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo. \n\nYo momma so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs! \n\nYo momma so fat she's got her own area code! \n\nYo momma so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagen! \n\nYo momma so fat God couldn't light Earth till she moved! \n\nYo momma so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her! \n\nYo momma so fat, whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in! \n\nYo momma so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago... \n\nYo momma so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg. \n\nYo momma so fat , her legs are like spoiled milk - white & chunky! \n\nYo momma so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the bitch's good side! \n\nYo momma so fat she sat on a
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1.Yo mama so STUPID when your dad said it was chilli outside, she ran outside with a bowl and spoon!\n\n2. Yo mama so ugly that when she joined an ugly competion, they said, sorry, no professionals!
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Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes looking at an orange juice box because it said "concentrate." \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, they had to burn the school down to get her out of the 3rd grade. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she sat in a tree house because she wanted to be a branch manager. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she stole a police car because she thought "911" meant Porsche. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she sat on the TV & watched the couch. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, when she was taking you to the airport and a sign said "Airport Left," she turned around and went home. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she put a ruler by her pillow to see how long she slept. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she was locked in a grocery store and starved. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, your house burned down because she couldn't find the "11" button to call 911. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she brought a towel to her carpool. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she stole free bread. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she got tangled up in a cordless phone. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she jumped out the window and went up. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she failed a blood test. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thought hamburger helper came with another person. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, if you gave her a penny for her thoughts, you'd get change back. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she sold the car for gas money. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, when your dad said, "It's chilly outside," she ran into the kitchen to get a bowl. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she got fired from the M&M's factory for throwing away all the W's. \n\nYo mama's so stupid, she heard that 90% of all accidents occur around the home, so she moved. \n\n\nchapter 3: ugly \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals." \n\nYo mama's so ugly, her face is closed on weekends. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she gets up, the sun goes down. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she has to sneak up on bath water. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, her picture is on the inside of a Roach Motel. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she'd make a train take a dirt road. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, instead of having her own 900 number, she has her own 911 number. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when I took her to a haunted house, she came out with a paycheck. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when I took her to the zoo, the guy at the door said, "Thanks for bringing her back." \n\nYo mama's so ugly, people go as her for Halloween. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she has to trick or treat over the phone. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she makes onions cry. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she scares away blind kids. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't come back. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she was born, the doctor slapped her mama. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, the doctor's still slapping her. \n\nYo mama's so ugly, when she leaned over to hear, "snap, crackle, pop," all she heard was "Aargh! Get us out of here!" \n\nYo mama's so ugly, the psychiatrist makes her lie face down. \n\nYo mama's
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Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!\nYo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money\nYo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
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OK those jokes are pretty good and i also have one here waiting for you\n\nWhat did the pirate say after someone asked why there was a steering wheel in his pants.\n\nhe says: Argghh its driving me nuts! hehe sorry its kinda dirty but it was good (to me it was good)