work with my ex and we have been talking again, small talk, when we see each other at work for a couple of weeks now. We have been be apart for the past three months. Lately it seems we are talking more and kind of flirting with each other the way we did before we started dating. Is she giving me signals or am I reading in to this too much?\n\nShe broke it off, she said she needed some time and space. I might have spent way too much time with her, crowded her a bit a think.\nShe keeps telling me that she will bring her dog up to work so I can see her. I miss that dog I'll admit it.
210984
Sorry, its over now. But you are a good friend to her. thats why she wont let you go.
284591
step back. tell her that you don't want to play games, because that's what she's doing.\n\nif you are ex's, then the feelings you are having now may be just because you feel like you are getting a second chance at something that didn't work before. think about why it didn't work out before. maybe you don't want to be with her afterall.\n\nthink about what she's doing now. it sounds like she's trying to play you and her "ex/current/who knows" boyfriend. sounds like she wants it all. or the opposite, she doesn't know what she wants, and that's why you are getting mixed messages.\n\nbreak up with her for now, until she figures out what she wants and she can stick to it. if she wants to be with you, then she ought to cut ties completely with her "ex/current/who knows" boyfriend. don't let yourself be in this relationship as it is now, because it's not good for you.
29679
That happened to me and it was the end of the relationship.  We met in college, had a long-distance relationship, then together for several months, then she moved 4-5 hours away after getting fired and getting a better job.  She wanted to marry, or at least live together openly, while I knew I couldn't marry her (too neurotic, too much fighting) and tried to hold on to the passionate girlfriend/boyfriend relationship indefinitely.  So it had been a holding pattern for several months, and her moving didn't really change it.  Soon she told me of reciprocal interest with a co-worker, which in retrospect I think was trying to drive me off, but I didn't bite and was actually friendly with the jerk.  Finally she said, "I think we ought to cool it and date other people".  I was in shock, but I remember what came out was, "You mean you want to break up?"  I don't remember what she said but the upshot was I wasn't going to share and she didn't try to work out a sharing arrangement.  Eventually she married the jerk.  I got an invitation to the wedding but I never answered and broke off contact.\n\nSo through the lens of my life experience, the relationship is on its last legs and you're looking for the kill.  I think the more honest and humane approach would be to present an ultimatum to get off of hold or break up, or just leave if you're not committed enough to force that issue.  It may seem cold, but it's better than getting into the jealousy thing with other guys.  I know being left for another man was much harder on me than being left out of general dissatisfaction, and it killed my interest in follow-up friendship (that part might be a blessing).  Someone else's story might have a different moral.\n\nGood luck,\nhouyhnhnm
288032
You didnt mention why you separated, I think that is important to know to answer the question.  But anyhow yes it does sound like she wants to hold off on the divorce.  Its a good thing you have pets, it will give you both the opportunity to spend time together to know if you should get back together.  Unless your going to be single the rest of your life there is no getting away from emotional heartache.  Its a part of life and love.  Might as well try and work it out with someone who was good enough to be your wife in the first place.
547523
I have been on this situation on her end. It is hard... She is hurting probably just as much as you are. Nobody invests their time into a relationship with the intention of it ending. The reason why she is running hot and cold with you is because she still loves you. When you two are together she remembers the good times and feels comfortable / safe with you. Whe she has been away for a while the things you did to hurt her creep back up and she gets upset. It is easier for her to say bad / mean things to you over the phone because she doesn't have to see the look on your face. It is sort of anonymous. Give her her space. There is still a chance you can save this relationship. But there is also a chance you could not. In my situation my ex and I just started talking again after 2 years of silence between us. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do... Waking p every day and choosing not to call him (he fu*cked up bad). I don't know what happened between you two but trust me at this point in your relationship it really could go both ways. \n\nI am sorry you have to go though this and some of those things you might not have wanted to hear but that is just what I have experienced. I hope it helped. Good luck!
154585
Honestly she's trying to get your attention about something.  She probably doesnt really want to split if she doesnt have a good reason.  We women want your attention and when we dont get it... we say what we can to get to you... try talking it out, I'm sure she's got a lot she wants to get out.
31975
did you talk and explain to her why you broke up with her. communication is very important. you should talk to her. stay come and try to step into her shoes. if that dont help well than its something she has to get through but atleast you know you made an effort. its like what is that saying you can lead the horse to the water but you cant make it drink.
569625
well in a way it's a good thing that you're avoiding her..but dont like shut her out completely. once she realizes that you've moved on,she'll probably start to miss you. you know? hah,i sound a lil silly,but i guess what you're doing is okay. give her a call,see if she's in a talkative mood. you can tell if she doesn't wanna talk if theres awkward silences,or if she comes up with a lame excuse to get off the phone. : ]
359039
I dont think you should be talking to your EX at all. And the fact that you are sneaking around makes me think you want something from her. There is a reason she is your EX. YOu should quit contacting her. And when your wife finds out I hope she kicks your scandalous a$$!
283872
Always remember that an ex is an ex for a reason. Obviously you two broke up for a reason and she nees to see that. You should just simply call her and explain that you arent trying to be mean but you dont want anything more with her. It sounds like she has codependency issues as well if she is going from you to a gf so soon. Just simply tell her so that it doesnt get out of hand. Dont ignore her because that can send mixed messages and it could be hard for you to stop later.
492673
Sorry:-))) But i am kind of amused...You know, the first thing that men have to learn about women is to give them their space. Hey...if your parting words weren't bitter, there is no cause for alarm. I am sure she'll call..giv her some time. You said she had a boyfriend..well, maybe she is busy..there could be a thousand things you dont know...So dont miss her too much. Try and concentrate on ur GF. I am sure she be in touch shortly.
649368
I hope she is not! That would be rude and really stupid. Maybe she is just using you. Ask her if she was serious. After 7 months, it's called a relationship. A strong one!
492972
She's trying to be nice and stay friends, although it is the wrong thing to do.  It's obvious that she broke up with you because she already had someone she was interested in, and wanted to go for it.  It's possible she is trying to have her cake and eat it too.  I would personally tell her it's over, and to leave it at that.  OVER.  No more calls.  Just tell her to leave you alone.  She is being selfish and not thinking of you.
632812
no, if you just broke up she should maybe give you some time. If she talks to you everday, it will seem like before. So at first it's probably not a good idea. But if its been a while then its fine if it doesn't bother you.
343796
i think you should stop calling her. I realize it will be difficult as sounds as though you really care for her but she is playing with your feelings. Sounds like she is out for her and not ready to be in a relationship. A friend of mine just went through something similar. Each time he got hurt more and more.  Guess I would tell her how you feel about what she is doing then if it continues its time to find someone new or accept the fact that is how she is.
52573
It probably means it is time to move forward.  If she has been seeing her ex often, it means they are working on getting back together.  It will be easy for you to just end it now instead of waiting until she ends it.  Psychological it is always better to end it first.  You have better closure.\n\nBut before doint this, have a heart to heart with her on her feelings.  If you sense that she is interested in getting back with her ex, let her go.  You have been good to her, but she has unresolved issues with her ex.  You will find someone else.
671831
if you two broke up for only her reason of 'being too comfortable', I would not phone her. It would set you back a bit I think- it does for me anyway. She obviously didn't treasure and revere you or the friendship/relationship you offered. I think your line of thinking is best for you right now, she did in a sense throw you away and you need to be surrounded by people who treat you better than that. Maybe some day you two could be friends, but it might seriously take you years to get over her. Don't waste anymore time and let her keep reeling you back in- go on with your life!\n\nGod bless