I’m a nice girl. I don’t go out partying every night but I know how to have a good time. Books and poetry are my life. My plan is to become a high school English teacher. HUGE football fan and getting into rugby…and I’m pretty funny. And yet I’m 19, never had a serious boyfriend, and maybe in my life been on 3 dates…that’s sad! And it comes down to this…The black guys I know don’t relate to on a higher level and they just don't get me. And I get sick of being called the ‘Oreo’ (look black on the outside but act white on the inside) just because I enjoy reading, am a virgin and don’t drink. How can wanting the best in life and wanting to make yourself better be considered ‘not being down’? The white guys see me more as their ‘best friend’ than girlfriend or end up being their ‘little sister’. It’s the ultimate nice girl syndrome. And I'm not one of those girls who lives for the attention of guys but it is getting really annoying...I'm a catch damnit!
204741
You can feel alone even when you are with someone. More than likely you are more mature than the guys you have been running into and have more of an intellect. When the right guy comes along he will notice you. Besides you may find if you go out with some of these guys you mentioned, that they are very shallow and have no real personality. You don't really want to have a boyfriend just to have a boyfriend. I would not let not having a boyfriend bother you. In fact, I would use the time you spend by yourself to allow you to become more independent. This may sound corny, but if you can be a friend to yourself and be happy being by yourself when the right guy comes along, he will see your self-confidence and that you know who you are on the inside, and your relationship with that special guy will last for a lifetime. When you run into that special guy on your journey through life, trust me, you will sparkle.
267765
well ummmmm maybe you should take a good look at yourself and see what you could do different to make them notice you. i'd say it's your personality. by this question you sound a little whiny to me and most girls only like wine with dinner. lol
414386
Well it all depends I have the same problem and the boys literally told me that they aren't looking for wife material which they claim is what I am. They're looking for the dumb females who is willing to give it up right after they have met. They told me that I'm the only damn good looking girl who takes her education seriously and has things going for herself. So really it's a good thing because they see you as a respectful young lady and not a $2 whoe.
638555
RIGHT HERE! I have ONE female friend. And because I have a boyfriend AND a job I have one male friend....my boyfriend. Girl its been like that for me since the seventh grade. Girls for whatever reason do not like me. I dont know why either. I'm the nicest person I know for real. I try to talk to females but they just dont like me for some reason. It drives me crazy!
285695
Hey girl. Ok, first let me say this. I am light skinned and have been called high yellow. And while you are being made fun of for being dark skinned (which I think is beautiful) I was and still do get made fun of for being light skinned.\nI am a lot older than you (add 13 years to your age) and I have a friend who I have been friends with since I was about 7. Do you know that this chick still makes remarks about light skinned people and my color.\nShe has told me on occassions that the only reason guys are into me is because I am light skinned with long hair and that guys are still hung up on that look. How do you think that makes me feel? No one can choose what color/race they are and if you weren't dark skinned, you would be getting made fun of for something else. \nSo as hard as it is, don't even worry about it cuz if people are making fun of you, then they aren't good enough to be your friends anyways. You can't stop it. Just try your best to ignore it and be the best YOU that you can be. Don't try to be someone you are not and don't let them see that it bothers you.\nKeep your beautiful head up.
137308
well first of all don't put your self down  like that. even though i don't know u i think that u aare a nice guy becccaues any girl would love to have boyfriend like u that does care about that girl even though she left u try to find someone better becaues she wasn't the girl for u but she will notice what she lost it will be to late but she will notice it and she will be soory because there aren't any guys like that anymore well there is but not much but she will know what she lost and u will find someone that aprciates u and that won't have a bf while going out with u well g2g email me if u need anything later take care
508427
I would date a black girl. To be honest (and attempting not to be Micheal Richards) the majority of the black culture is very unappealing to me. However, I've known a handful of black people that I can get along with and hang out with. So if I found a compatible match then it wouldn't bother me.
186789
great question and the trouble is you're trying to understand it from a guy's standpoint so you have no chance.  it's definitely down to what the girls here have been saying that they just feel uncomfortable with it and there is also a sense of predictability in treating a woman too nice. I'm single but cool with it as I know the key to all of this is being who you really are and not trying so hard to impress.  concentrate more on what makes you happy in life and the right girl will be attracted to that. don't try and make others happy as you'll lose sight of yourself
160496
She doesn't want to get the label, "Nerd", "dork", or "geek" so she acts stupid so people won't know she's smart.  I do that all the time.  I am a smart, nice girl and it's just like that saying with guys, "nice guys finish last."  The same is true with girls.  Only the stupid, flirty, gorgeous girls have lots of dates.  Us smart, nice, average looking girls have a hard time so we act dumb hoping to get the guys to notice us.
78363
For one YOUR A GOOD GUY. Ima girl and I dont always want a good guy.  I dont want him giving me everything I want. I want to feel like "I" have to work for it not them.  I promise thats exactly what they are lookng for. If they cant find it in you they end up finding it in someone who does do it. You know what that's telling you..?  They arent your soulmate. When you find a girl and you treat them how they want and yall r perfect for each other then she wont do you wrong.  But stop being so lovey lovey and stuff. Be aggressive!!
459210
I agree with Helper.  If you truly are really nice, let EVERYONE see it, not just the crowd you hang out with.  You could also be very intimidating.  If your attitude is like that about girls asking out guys, then you most likely view every situation like that as pathetic.  There is nothing wrong with being old-fashioned, but sometimes you have to go after what you want, don't wait for it to come to you.  Perhaps you just weren't meant to be with tons of people in high school.  Slow down and enjoy life now, don't try to experience everything all at once.
243431
Alright. Here's the thing I never had a boyfriend until my sophomoreyear of COLLEGE! No, I was not a loser. Quite the opposite actually (I was named Ms. THS at my school) Yes, I did go out on dates, but my first date was homecoming at my highschool and that is still a year away for you! You shouldn't define yourself by wether or not you have a boyfriend. Yes, having a boyfriend is nice but give it some time. Right now I have the worlds most amazing boyfriend. He is literally a genius (by IQ), he tells me I'm beautiful everyday, he makes me laugh, and he's really cuddly. I'm not worlds most awesome looking girl (see my 360 page), but he thinks I'm beautiful. There is a guy out there for you! He'll think you are beautiful too. FIRST find what you love about yourself and when you accentuate that (physical or inner) others will see it too. Peace and Love and Good Luck!
473305
Hi emma you seem a nice girl and should not be in this situation \nanyway i am an a guy of 26 and have only one girlfriend ever\nIt is depressing when every one has somebody and you don't,\nI have tried to ask a girl out who i really like working in the shop they just say no and laugh so it does not work, but you want to ask a boy out just do, if they laugh they laugh but it is there lose. \ngood luck
17118
We're a bit slow in understanding... No, in se everyone wants a guy that's nice. We're just frightened that 'nice' is all he'll ever be. A man is supposed to be an animal sometimes: It's superficial, but with a nice guy it's only guessing if he'll ever be a challenge in bed. With macho-dudes you're 'sure' of a challenge, and whenever he's sweet, it's even a bigger party, for you know that didn't com easy for him... The rough guy with the soft heart is a stayer on the market. And even when he doesn't have a soft heart, you can always pretend for your friends he has and then they think you're a winner. It's also very 'in' to complain about your guy. Some girls bond by wining. Don't ask me where that comes from. But in the end I think philosopher René Girard has an answer: 'You want what is wanted.' Tough guys get promoted a lot (e.g. by themselves or by 'cool' friends). Nice guys don't promote themselves and get promoted by parents (not really a reference, parents are those people we don't want to become like). And since you want what others you admire want,... you end up with a bully sometimes. Good to know: we do come to sence. When we get to know this nice guy and he surprises us with some unexpected male talents,... Ding Ding Jackpot!
169981
I'm not racist but i like guys with my skin color.  but i have friends from other races.  What matters to me in a guy is if they could treat me and my friends the same.  I don't want to go out with a guy that doesn't like my friends.  Thats a turn off.
282594
Not immature, perhaps, but ignorant or insensitive. As you become close to a girl, you start getting an idea of what she's looking for (and everyone wants different things and has different priorities). This is just a guess, but maybe some guys don't allow themselves to get that close.
101884
There are no nice guys and bad girls. They are all people like you and me. Forget about labels and stereotypes your friends want you to believe. The only important thing is what's in your heart. How do you feel? My advice is to stay healthy and attractive to the opposite sex. That means caring for and loving people that care for and love you.