I think I am in love with a close friend to my family. Ever since he moved out of my family's house all i can do is think about him. The problem is he is 21 and iam 14. I can't stop thinkin about him. I know its against the law but what can i do i cant stop thinkin about him. PLEASE HELP ME. I am in dire need of help.
210803
ur too young to be in love.. just enjoy life.. time will come that u'll find the right guy... if ever he's the one, im sure he'll wait for you 'til u reach the right age..
305962
let their relationship alone.  if you go after this guy, you might end up with no one.  if you and your cousin are best of friends, how can you even think about ruining that relationship. guys will come in and out of your life, but good friends are hard to find, especially if you are related to this person.  they will be there always. she will fell so hurt, betrayed.  think about what you have to lose in this decision.
343484
hi,\n\nyou mentioned family&personal problems. from what you have stated it is more of your own college problem nothing more. if this is your problem, if he is not close to you how do you say he is your friend and it also looks he may not be interested. and are you by anyway infatuated with this guy. this will not help. talk to him, if you want. but this is a phase. you feel the sunrises and sets in this guy. just come out of it, you have to concentrate on you education,future. without proper education even if the guy is interested it is not goign to help. First list out your priorities. If you have any other problem, try to think over, talk it over and write it and tear it. really writing/venting it on paper really helps you clear out.\n\nWell all the best, we can only give suggestions.
8408
This may not be exactly what you want to hear but I'm going to answer your question in the adult manner in which you asked it.\n\nIf the relationship is meant to be, it will last the test of time...time for both of you to grow up a bit more & wait to date with your parents approval. I know this doesn't help much but everyone, including your boy-friend is trying to look out for you & do what's best. Personally, it always annoyed me when people did this for me when I was your age so I can understand you feeling like you don't know where to turn.\n\nMy suggestion is to remain friends with this boy & don't try to take things too fast. There is always time for dating in a few years, not to mention all of the other things that tend to come with dating. While you might feel ready for some of that now, you will appreciate it much more after having waited for it & building a stronger friendship. Yes, I know you may not believe this right now so, please, read this little story about my cousin...\n\nI have a cousin who met a boy when they were both young...just about your age, in fact. The two of them became friends but he was shy &, as time went on, he never asked her out. He didn't go out with anyone else either & always spent his free time with her. Well, when they turned 16 & 17, he finally asked her out & they dated only each other. As it turned out, the boy had asked my uncle long ago what his rules were about dating his daughter (when he was about 14, I believe) & also told my uncle of his intention to marry her someday. While my uncle didn't believe it at the time, he certainly did as the years rolled by & the boy refused to date anyone other than my cousin. All the way through high school & college they were a pair &, believe it or not, they didn't even go in for the things that most teenagers do, if you know what I mean. To everyone else it just seemed like a sweet & gentle relationship.\n\nWhen they finally moved to that next level of a relationship, they were already in college, having been together & waited years with nothing more than kisses & hugs. They are now married with a beautiful child &, I promise you, have one of the strongest relationships that I have ever seen. I honestly think this is because they were friends first & took their time learning everything about each other.\n\nI hope this helps & that you can learn something useful from my cousin's story...
426018
At the age of 14, you are not in love with her.  You are in love with the idea of being in love and that can be just as hard to deal with.\n\nGive her some space to find her own way.  Remain friendly, try to do things with her, but if you smother her she will be long gone - and rightfully so.\n\nLet things take their course - you can't force someone to love you just because you love them.  Life doesn't work that way - no matter how old you are.
228225
how do u kno what love is at 14?? he sounds like more of a best friend! don't get ur feelings hurt! there is a difference between love and lust, this sounds more like lust to me!
196088
If you really care about your cousin, love her unconditionally. When you start putting conditions on love, it is not love. It would be great if you could concentrate on yourself : you are worried about what people will think about you. People will judge you by your actions, not the actions of your cousin. You have BOUNDARY problems. Try to accept all people as individuals.
359074
I think part of you knows you are making a mistake.  If you didn't feel this way, you would want to share the good news with your family.  You wouldn't be worried about their reaction.  Slow down a little bit.  Get to know this guy better.  Finish school if you haven't already.  You have all the time in the world ahead of you.  One month is not enough time to get to know someone.  Marriage takes so much more than just the feeling of love.  Believe it or not, the infatuation you are feeling now will fade and when it does, you will find out if your love is deep enough to sustain  throughout life's challenges.  There's no way you can know that yet.
186925
crush.. i believe nothing ever comes of it its just great thought you have of person whom you want to be with.. child hood love " teen " young and its the first love you have ever known.. everything is new and you learn a lot from each other like sex, and things you like and dis like in relationships... love.. hm mm well maybe by the time your 19 25 ish around that age you should have met someone that you truly loved even the bad things about them... you always have to take the good with the bad and when you truly love someone than the bad is OK to handle.. like my current boyfriend dips... "yuck" but i truly love him and so it do sent even bother me now... your fights are about real things when you truly love someone cuz the Little shit is obsolete...
80474
I think you should probably try to move on.  Spending so much time caring for someone who doesn't feel the same way is heartbreaking, I know from experience.  So date other people, make more friends, whatever it takes to get your mind off him.  If God truly wants the two of you to be together, he'll wake up and see how wonderful you are.  If not, there's someone else out there for you! You seem young, so you have a lot of years to find that special someone.  In the meantime, don't waste time with someone who doesn't deserve your attention.\n\nGood luck!  :)
341160
Been there, done that.  Sooner or later it seems, we all have to face the fact that our close friends can be just as nasty and uncaring as our worst enemies -- when it comes to their lovers or potential spouses.  Some of this is to be expected -- their priorities have changed and are moving on with their lives.  Other times though, these suddenly "hooked-up" friends seem to act as though we never existed and may even completely cut us out of their lives.\n\nLet your friend make her own mistakes.  She'll see the error of her ways and will probably be coming back to you.  In the meantime, move on yourself and begin to develop other friendships.  I know (from experience) that some of these platonic friendships can become so close that the friends are more like siblings than friends -- it's hard to move on but it is something we have to do to survive.  If she happens to pull this nonsense on you again with another guy, you will know better the next time and will also have a new set of friends to fall back on. \n\nIt might be a good idea to rely on your family for socializing and emotional support right now too.\n\nGood luck, dear.  I am thinking about your situation.  I've been there and know what you are going through.
340179
Well he is a lot older but I don't think that's a problem. It's sad about your parents and you but if they were with you maybe you could ask them. I don't think there are any laws or anything like that against your situation. I mean why in the world should you stop liking someone\nor dating someone or something like that just because of their age?
599289
at least have some self respect and move on...you are just obsessed...what ever you think of him is all in your imagination and it's not real!! there's no mercy in love.....
669287
Such a wise young lady you are. \n14 is young but many times we as adults think we have all the answers but well we don't we live and learn and I can say we make mistakes all the time. \nPersonally I think that we all just try and move too fast and we think we have to do this or that because others are doing it and so it looks like the right thing. Love is a magically thing and when it happens for real then there is no denying what it is. many mistake affection and even lust for love but that is because they want to not because it is right. \nYour at an age where your going to see things a little different and thats ok and your going to notice yourself and the changes that have been happening for a while now. You will have feelings and being a female you will have some very strange emotions and this will lead to thoughts and it is normal. You have time right now to take all the time you need to explore life and to explore all the different kinds of people. You will meet so many who will make you have both good and bad thoughts which in turn will lead to good and bad feelings. at 14 you have a chance to think grown up but still be just a kid and that is the best time in life. Having only one person as they say girlfriend or boyfriend is placing a restriction on yourself and being a teen you know how you hate so many rules well by restricting your choices you put a rule on yourself that is going to end up more painful then not. How many kids have you seen who have broke up and how many have you seen so sad and they think life is over and they feel wasted. keep yourself open learn and get to know many boys etc... really get to know them see what they like and dislike and slowly build on this. find what you like and dislike and try to find those who have the same things you do. having only one lets say boyfriend means you have stopped looking and now it is him and only him but if you do not choose one then you have a pick of any. at 16 you will pretty much know everyone around you and know who you rather be around the most and yep then you can say lets become girlfriend and boyfriend but keep in mind this is not a promise he is the one you will grow old with no this is the time where you learn even more about each other and ask more personal things like what he wants to do after high school and after that and life he see's himself in. and if his values are matched and you learn to trust and your learn to grasp each others emotions then you begin to feel each others pain and sorrow laughter and love.
558011
Hi man. I had a story like this some months ago. I couldn't do nothing, because I didn't want to ruin their love for each other. I just waited, and after three  months they broke up. And she understood that I loved her, and really liked it. I think you should just wait.Maybe you should make activities with other friends, that can help you not to think about your friend.\n    I really think that you'll win her heart.
63231
Love is strange in its own magical way. Love is like a dam. Once it's released, you never know when the flow will come to an end. Right now, your love is still flowing all these years. If you really want to forget her that much, then do something different to approach this thought process. If you know she loves you as well, then go get her. Don't waste time crying in your hear...in your soul. If know she doesn't feel the same way, then think differently about how you feel about her. Think of it as best friends kind of love: you love her because she matters to you greatly and that your friendship for her will never change. Accept this "new" change of yours and think that everyday. Better to be friends than to be in that hell hole of unforgiving love. Sometimes to have a friend love you is just as loving as having that special someone by your side. Try to move on each day if you can and just remember you loved someone who was wonderful and great, but with conditions couldn't happened. Some where in life, you are bound to find someone new. It might sound a little stupid, but maybe the person who you been looking for could be right in front of you. Just keep a clear head and watch for hints. Maybe the person has already been hinting they have feelings for you and you just haven't realized it. I hope I helped in some way.
473294
i know how that is.. i actually was friends with this boy for 13 years and we were so close and we always had feelings for eachother but never said anything. well i now live 15 hours away from him and we lost everything! it hurts so much to think about him but now he has a girlfriend so its way to late ... it kills me everyday to think what could have been!so my advice call him and let him know NOW!