I spent the early years of my son's life teaching him the philosophy that we create our own reality.  He is 15 now and has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  He believes that the rituals he performs keeps bad things from happening.  I have him in therapy and on medication but I don't know how to reconcile for him or myself the issue of whether he can control reality by his thoughts because I still believe that you create your own reality because I have seen too much evidence in life to support it.  If there is anyone who is familiar with this philosophy, I really could use some help in understanding our situation.
200791
Reality is truly self created, perception is all. THis is a very commonly accepted principle and one argued against by those who are certain that God created the only true reality. In any case read http://www.redshift.com/~beyond/real1010.html lays it all out nicely with resources for further study. Your son's OCD is in no way a result of your belief in self-created reality, as another poster inferred. Take care.
529451
Well it's true, a person's belief is stronger than medicine sometimes, faith can heal or injure. A person who wants to be sick will never be cured no matter how much time and money is spent, unless they get the cure they desire. After all it's literally "in your mind" and no one can get in there. They can use drugs to blur your mind, or electro-shock therapy to try "re-wiring"  it drastically, literally forcing you to think differently, the same as people recovering from strokes or major brain injuries learn to. Much of dementia is caused simply by letting our minds go. Do I believe in satanic possessions? I'm not sure, but I believe there is potential for great good or great evil in every person, it's a battle waged within us every moment, and sometimes people feel the best way to face temptation is to yield to it and then claim they are a victim, "temporary insanity", or even demonic "possession." I don't know, but I believe evil requires a human body, a physical presence, in order to have power. And it's too easy to have a cop out like saying "I can't help myself". If a person is possessed I doubt any "exorcism" could work unless they want it to. But I'd like to know if any study was ever done to see if people with no religous beliefs ever get "possessed"?
331818
I applaud you and your family.  I strive towards that all the time, but having been brought up in a home that had all the conviences, took things for granted, ate whatever looked/tasted good etc. etc. I have trouble breaking away from what I grew up with.  I am moving more towards vegitarianism slowly, but surely and try to use homeopathic rememdies as much as I can.  I know that I am no where near you and your family, but I try.\n\nAs a social worker though I would have to say that although I envy your lifestyle I would still be concerned for your children.  Don't get me wrong, I'm sure they are just fine, but I have seen many children who for whatever reason have not been exposed to TV, public schools and mainstream culture who are maladjusted and or taken advantage of when they are older.  I'm sure you can do your best to teach them about some of the nightmares society will offer them, but some things just aren't learnable/teachable, they need to be experienced.  My concern for your children will be how will they adjust to other people, to society at large, how will they maintain this lifestyle with all the pressures from others, how will they stay safe when they may be ignorant to some of lifes obsticles.  I think it is great to live the way you do, I would just do everything in your power to ensure that your children don't get shell shocked when they leave the "comfort of home".
176167
We've all been through different life experiences.  My experiences are different from my fellow Christians.\n\nWe have free will.  We may not be able to choose our experiences, but we can choose what we think about and how we react to those experiences.\n\nGod holds us accountable for what we can control.
335889
Normally you would either need to intake drugs that changes reality or you have to have a mental health issue that creates voices in your head.  However I believe that if you believe hard enough you can create those voices in your head.  Some people that are sane do hear them, just as a sane child that has an imaginary friend.
178583
That's a tough one..\nSome people are natural followers it seems. As kids, they have been pounded with the notion that teachers,parents, whatever religious leader they were told to follow could just not be argued with because they were OLDER and RIGHT (you're only a kid..what do you know type of answers). I know some who still have this mind-set. They have a "certain" problem with authority and are not able to question it. The "don't make waves" kind.\nSome people are kind of intellectually lazy too.....More convenient to accept, follow rather than research and make up your own mind. Yep..some are enthusiastic and some just only "pretend".\nI don't know if I am actually answering your questions.\nI was brought up catholic but it never, ever felt right. It was just not for me.\nThere is feeling and thinking. Usually " the feeling" comes first and then the "Thinking": research, interest..etc.\nWhen I first heard the idea of reincarnation, I was really young, 12 maybe..but it felt "YEAH..THAT FEELS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT..somebody out there has got the same idea ! Wow !"....then the research began.\nTough question to answer.
73575
your mother is very irrational, letting your son chose his own path is just fine.  You didn't teach him to be an atheist, that was his own choice.  You hardly corrupted him, if this atheism thing is the only thing your mother believes went wrong.  She is blaming you for HIS actions, this should not be, because it is NOT your fault.  Tell her that no one can force religion on anyone, and more than likely he may have rejected christianity regardless. Most importantly, whatever your mom says, do not blame yourself, you have done nothing wrong... it is just her own distoreted perception.
104648
Yes I know exactly what you mean. I am doing a course right now based on the book Dianetics which teaches you exactly what part of the mind this"turmoil" comes from. Why it can come and go and come back again. But more important I am learning a technique that anyone can learn to help others get rid of it completely. I have personally experienced this working and been able to help others with it ,which is also a great feeling.\nJust read the book. It will fully answer your question and also give you a solution that works! (there's no a lot of that around these days....)
294300
As a route to 'recover' memories, it is discredited.  A close friend was in 'treatment' about 10 years ago with a therapist who thought this would be a key to his problems.  \nHis wife happened to mention to me about his horrific past.  When I questioned her, I found out that he and the therapist had invented a past that was impossible, due to my knowledge of his whereabouts during that time period.  The invented 'past' was heavily themed with his phobias and obsessive thoughts that he should have been working on freeing himself from.\n\nUnless the lack of involvement with her past is causing problems in the present - let it be.  If it is in combination with problems in the present, consult a regular licensed psychologist.
474466
I try and live my life in such a way that I can say that.  Don't a lot of people? As a parent I try and ask myself those kinds of questions frequently to make sure I am teaching what I want to teach to my child.  Over the years I have found it's better for my own mental health to give up the things I had to lie about.  My husband does say I am fearless - it's just that I don't see the point in using up my energy being scared.
216100
I have no doubt that you have been trying to instill values of the clean nature in him for a long time. Here he is almost 18 and has yet to adapt. Soooo, I am relatively sure you are asking for help, but not expecting any miracles. You know that you have probably already exhausted every avenue that any one of us might tell you. I have sons also, and when you describe your son its as if you were talking about one of my boys. I have no solution for you,... I just wanted you to know you are not alone in this aspect. There is one thing you can "teach yourself" though that might eliminate some of your frustration about him. Don't take it personnel when he does this! Save your energy. Choose your battles! Keep instilling the lesson of what he needs to know, but don't worry about him not doing it. Try a role change with him on occasions,... when he needs you to do something, tell him "just a minute", or "I will get on that soon", or "I meant to do that, but forgot", ...throw his lines back at him and watch him get frustrated. Its good clean amusement for you, I promise!  My boys, and I am sure your son, too, are 'good' people, and yes, lazy people. But as long as he is staying out of real trouble, you really have no problems compared to some Moms out there. They do grow up, and when you go to their homes in the future, he will make you proud. I know!!! You are me, 14 years ago. Hang in there, its going to be alllllright!
192294
Praying is a worthwhile option but be careful to pray to your own God. imagine the most loving, forgiving, caring, patient, headstrong and determined person you can and ask for their help. but beware cults like Jehovahs, Catholics, born agains etc. I don't codemn them but they have many pitfalls (they all believe they are divine yet few show any signs of it). If possible ask the mother to get an allergy test...be aware of her environment, diet etc. You'd be suprised how something as simple as dairy milk or sugar can affect a fragile mind.\nIf she is in the mental health system she ironically has less freedom/control. Psychiatric drugs are an abomination, mental hospitals break almost half of all the human rights a person is due under the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Doctors will dispute this but they're making a fortune and are in reality above reproach. \nIf possible encourage her/the family to try to be physically active get plenty of fresh air, sun, fresh food etc. If anyone reading this thinks it is soppy fantasy ...you have no idea.... I was sectioned and abused by a mental hospital. My family and ex-partner tried to keep me locked up and take my child. By sheer determination I kept my sanity (just about)I smuggled a letter out via a brother and took legal action. Ten years later I still live with my child as a single parent I have nothing to do with my family, ex-partner. I went to college and got a third level qualification and am in a well paid professional job.\n\nBe careful not to get too involved, sometimes people aren't even honest with themselves. It takes a lot of courage to face and forgive yourself sometimes so be careful not to get drawn into what maybe someones false reality. If the person is unable/unwilling to face reality no-one else can do it for them.\n\nI am tormented by thoughts of suicide as there's just about no-one I trust and life is misery quite often. I stay active, eat well and believe in the 5th commandment:thou shall not kill, myself or any living thing (I'm now fruitarian/grains and seeds included).  \n\nGood luck. your dilemma is heartbreaking. I've been living with a broken heart for the last 19 years but I refuse to believe it wont mend. aim to be that strong, patient, caring, forgiving (to those who seek forgiveness-I believe you can't forgive someone who doesn't want it) god made us in his image and I believe we will have him in our hearts again sooner or later just like children DO.  peace with a passion.
185715
Some people just enjoy this practice.  You might consider making an appointment for the two of you with a licensed therapist.  It's often easier to talk with a disinterested third party as a go-between.  The therapist should be able to help your son explain to you why he engages in this behavior, as well as help you understand why your son does it.\n\nI would gently suggest that you do not berate your son for this behavior.  He is probably dealing with a lot of issues within himself regarding it already and, being an adolescent certainly isn't helping him any right now.  Until you can get the 2 of you into therapy, you might want to just make it a non-issue.
106855
It sounds like you truely do have OCD. I take it you are underage and cannot obtain medical treatment on your own. If your parents refuse to have you treated please go as soon as you become of age. It can be very sucessfully treated with medication and or therapy.\n\nthis is from a web site:\n\nWhat are obsessions and compulsions?\nObsessions are recurrent, persistent, unwanted ideas, thoughts, images or impulses that are experienced involuntarily, appear to be senseless, and feel out of control. They commonly intrude when you are trying to focus on thinking or doing other things. Obsessions are often accompanied by uncomfortable feelings, such as fear, disgust, doubt, or a sensation that things have to be done in a way that is "just so." \n\nSome common obsessions include: \n\nfear of danger to oneself or others \nfear of contamination \na need for exactness or order \nA compulsion is a repetitive behavior - a ritual - that you feel driven to do, and seemingly cannot stop doing. Compulsions occur as a result of obsessions and represent your attempts to manage your incessant thoughts by doing something to try to settle them. For example, if an obsessive worry is whether or not the door was locked, then a compulsive response might be to check the lock repeatedly. Some common compulsive behaviors are: \n\nexcessive checking \ncounting \nsilent repetition of words \nhand washing \ncleaning \n ordering / arranging \ntouching \npraying \nhoarding \n \n\nObsessions and compulsions range from mild checking behavior (did I lock the door?) to severe cases where you are unable to function based on compulsions having taken over normal life functioning. If we think of obsessive-compulsive traits and behaviors on a continuum of varying degrees and intensities, most people experience them with little or no negative consequence on their daily lives and relationships. \n\nWhen obsessions, compulsions, and perfectionist behaviors take up excessive time and significantly interfere with your daily life and relationships, it is time to seek help. When this occurs, the repetitive and seemingly out-of-control behaviors of obsession and compulsion may be indicative of a disorder that should be addressed with the help of a licensed professional. \n\nIf: \n\nyou feel unable to keep up with your normal appearance and behavior, \nyou can’t work, \nyou cut off connections with friends and families and are unable to socialize, or \nyou can’t take care of yourself and have trouble eating, sleeping, bathing, etc. \nit is time to seek help! \nBehavioral therapy with medications seems to offer the best long-term improvement for the treatment of OCD. Even though you probably realize that your anxiety and behaviors are excessive and irrational, changing them is not a simple matter. Most people with OCD require assistance from a qualified therapist.\n\nCognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Generally viewed as the most effective form of psychotherapy for treating most anxiety disorders, CBT involves the use of such techniques as: \nthought-stopping \ngradual challenging of irrational behaviors \nidentifying triggers and separating them from the feelings of extreme fear and the desire to avoid certain situations \nsystematic desensitization focused on the physical sensations of your anxiety \n"post-modern" therapies (such as Narrative and Solution-Focused models), which may help by placing the symptoms outside you and allowing you to tell a new story about them. \nPsychoeducation: One of the difficulties with OCD is the confusion about this disorder. It is frustrating for the individual and family members to manage a situation that is so misunderstood. An early and important part of treatment is getting a good education in what is known about this disorder. \nMedications: Certain anti-depressants (usually SSRIs) or other anti-anxiety medications have had good success with many people who suffer from OCD. It appears that these medications act
616223
This is a very interesting topic. It's like how you can hear yourself say something in your mind, but you don't actually hear sound. Or how you see a certain image when your eyes are open (hence, daydream). It's difficult to observe thoughts as they are happening, since the only way to actually formulate an opinion about what we are thinking is to analyze what we remember thinking. It's pretty amazing how our minds work, and what they control. We can't (more accurately, MOST of us can't) voluntarily control the rate of our heart beat, but we can voluntarily control our breathing. Yet, when we are asleep or not paying attention, our brain's nervous system takes over. It's so amazing...\n\nI can go on about this forever! : ) I actually have never heard of the Heisenberg Uncertainty principle but I'll look into it. (After a pause...) My thoughts are telling me to finish typing. ^_^
69585
how do you control your son for not touching an electricity or a very sharp knife? why dont you let god control him?\n\nif your financial cant support 11 children why do you do that for?\n\nwe have brain and wisdom from god, so use it...
476606
I had similar thoughts at your age and found that I was not open to the answers that I was given. Part of my psychi led me to look for easy answers.There is no easy answers when it comes to life. A good place to start is with a well known book that will teach you how to best use the full capacity of you're brain.It will give you a base from which to safely explore your questions. The bible is so much more than people believe it to be.Don't let the beliefs of others impeade you're progress towards happiness.