i touched her down there and now she acts like i did it on purpose. we've been friends for years and she knows i'm not a lesbian and i explained it was an accident but things are still real awkward :( i dont want to lose such a good friend over this. i asked this in another section but didnt get much help.....sorry for posting it twice.
214022
Just be honest. You have explained it to her but she still acts weird, so maybe she doesn't understand it the first time you explained it to her. \nBut when you talk to her, instead of you doing the talking, let her talk. Let her speak up and see what her concerns are. Ask her open questions like "I feel you are avoiding me, and it seems to me that it is because of what happened...what do you think?(or am I right?)" and let her voice her problems. The main point is to for her to let things off her chest, not for you to keep repeating that it was an accident, because if she thinks otherwise, there is nothing you can say that will convince her, so get her talking.\nFrom what you say, she seems quite offended: "she acts like I did it on purpose." Point that out to her!\n"You seem to me like you are quite upset, if not angry, about what happened...is that right?"\nAsking questions by pointing out how you feel (to me, you seem to be...) will be less likely to offend her than stating what you think is going on (i think you are pissed at me), because when you say "I think", it is like a judgement, and if she feels like you are judging her, it will not help the situation. Say, "I feel" "it seems to me".\n\nAfter she gets talking, let her know you understand. Maybe she is afraid that you are bi or lesbian and therefore is afraid that you are trying to approach her with that kind of relationship. Ask her "Do you think because of what happened, that I have that kind of (lesbian) tendancy?" She might look at you weird, but to get it out in the open is better, and much quicker, than beating around the bush. Be open and honest and sincere, otherwise it just won't work. If you value this friendship, be prepared to put yourself up to the line and open up.\nTell her, you value this friendship, and wish it would stay the way it has been. You don't intend it to go any deeper, but you don't want it to melt away either. \n"I feel that things have been really awkward between us and we aren't the friends we used to be. I don't want that to happen bacause I value etc etc"\n\nOpen up, be honest.\nIf she still doesn't understand, it would be time to let go because it would be her hurdle to jump once you have opened yourself up and explained it to her.
454501
Tell her you don't mind being friends with her, but you have absolutely no intentions of being involved sexually with the opposite sex.  Let her know you don't swing that way and her actions are starting to make you feel uncomfortable.  I also like what you said about she's trying to turn you into something your not.  Say that to her too!  Good luck.
40532
She feels a little uncomfortable now, she thought you felt like she did (just hangin' buddies). She's trying to keep the friendship but not make you feel she's interested in a relationship. It's probably hard now for both of you to act like nothing ever happened. \n Someone must have really hurt her bad before for her to be afraid of a serious relationship. And it may be something she doesn't want to talk about yet, to anyone. Just call her and say, "Hey, Buddy, What cha' doing. Wanta hang out LIKE OLD TIMES??" (And just let the past be past about what you told her. Don't mention it.)  \n If you can't do this, just tell her you have to serious of feelings for her to just be friends and you think 'hanging out' would be too uncomfortable for both of you. If she does have serious feelings for you, she'll tell you. If not just let her go her way. \nGood Luck.
582435
I'm straight, but I love the story of how my best friend came out to me, if you'll listen. I was the first person she ever told. We went for a walk (for no "apparent" reason) and she had me sit down with her on an empty bench in the hotel near where we were living. She started talking, talking in circles, dropping hints and getting really upset. I was so worried about her. I wasn't sure what it was, but I knew it was something sexual. Was she raped? Was she pregnant? If she had been raped, I would break the guy's face, but she wasn't the type to get pregnant. Then it clicked in my head. I asked her if it was ok for me to guess what she was trying to tell me, and she nodded. I asked if she was trying to come out to me, and she didn't move. I asked again, and she nodded. I hugged her so tight! I told her how relieved I was, how I thought something bad had happened. She told me how she had been keeping it hidden for so long, and if she hadn't come out to me, she never would have. We're so close now, I go around calling her my sister. The one problem is that we both like the same type of girl, so if there's a nice bi girl we both like, there may be a discussion... ;P
315526
I don't feel as if she is a friend to you.  But "you" know if she is or not because you are around her.  It is very ironic that everyone who you've seemed to have liked she likes to and has been physical with them in some way. I feel as if no "so called" friends should fall out over a guy.  Stick to having a "true friend" someone who doesn't like who you like knowing that you like them.  You aren't losing to your friend sweetheart because as long as you know that she is liking who you like try not to be around her because a true friend wouldn't keep on doing this to you.  This has happened to me but the situation was different.  Eventhough I don't know you I'd like to become your friend or get to know you because we have something in common even if I only give you my opinions or advice.  I wish you the best and if you don't continue to be friends with her don't let it be over the guys let it be because of how she is treating you.
450155
Hey, I'm sorry about this incident, but everything happens for a reason, and maybe this is it: reappreciating everything that you are and all that you have, giving you a different perspective of life.  I don't think its too much of you to ask your friend to be with you. But all that depends on what level and to what extent. For example she may not be comfortable with intimacy, since you are supposed to be 'friends' for now, cause I think she may think that you'd be using the accident as an excuse to have your way or gain sympathy and all that. You need to state clearly your terms for needing her, and let her know what you need her for. And if you need her for keeps and all that, then maybe you could ask her that too, but not too soon after this accident.  Take your time and see if she'd still keep coming and things may kick off from there. Glad to know you're alive and well... dudes in my town haven't been so lucky with accidents this year...
215350
Well if she is your best friend (I'm assuming that is what b.f stands for), and she did that to you, knowing how you felt about him, then she obviously doesn't regard friendship like you do! The joke is on you unfortunately! I would suggests you redefine the quality of what a true friend is and is not! Of course your slowness to be to the point with this guy didn't help. Your friend did what you were hesitant to do and succeeded. You partially have yourself to blame. If this guy is a flirt, it is probably just as well she got him. Flirtation tends to lead to jealously and mistrust. You will see it unfold in front of your eyes, then you can thank your lucky stars that she got stuck with him!
539666
Ah, the jealousy of protecting him for you is greater than the opportunity for her to touch you.  Definitely--you are not a lesbian.
333780
Your screen name suits you perfectly.  If you just want to get laid, go for it.  I have seen this situation plenty of time to know that she doesn't love you.  She likes having you there to cry on.  She needs some love and affection, and you happen to be there.  If it wasn't you it would just be someone else.  What do you think would happen if your friend found out you guys hooked up, and then he decided to get back with her?  What would she do?  She would probably dump you in a second and get back with your friend.  If you think this would happen, then realize that she is only  using you.  Therefore, if she is using you for comfort, it is fair to use her for sex, but don't get your heart all involved.  Just do it and have fun.  She isn't really a girl you want to date seriously if this is how she normally acts.  Keep her around until you find a good one.
159921
I've had a few platonic female friends.  I've given some hugs and some backrubs.  I've never kissed them.  Your girlfriend crossed the line.  Why would she tell you that "his little thingy got hard"?!?  Definitely past the line.\n\nIt sounds like she is playing games and is at the least trying to make you feel jealous.  At the worst, she is shopping for another boyfriend and just wants to keep you on the line.\n\nIt's hard to convey all the intricacies of a relationship on these little questions.  But from the little you've revealed, I would dump her and cut off all contact.  Until she grows up, she is not worthy to date seriously.
321192
Hi angel. I am sorry that you are going through a tough time with your mate, and that your friend is also. \n\nI want to start by warning you that I am a lesbian, so I may be a bit biased on this matter. If you are looking for opinions from straight people, feel free to move on.\n\nIt sounds a lot like you are feeling real emotions and a connection with your friend. I can't tell without meeting her whether she is feeling the same way about you, but I would definitely suggest following your heart. Don't let society's ideas keep you from doing what your heart tells you is right.\n\nI would suggest not just coming out and saying "I want to be with you", or by kissing her. You really dont want to destroy the wonderful friendship that you have.\n\nAn example of a more subtle way, would be this: Next time you are talking together, and you are discussing your troubles with your mates, find a way to give her a hug, and hold the hug for a good bit longer than you need to. Then, pull back and look her in the eyes with tears in your own eyes, and a smile on your face, and just say. "Thanks, I needed that, and I love you." Then, hold her gaze with your own, and see what her reaction is.\n\nThis way, if she has no feelings for you in that way, she is free to consider it as simply an in-need-of-comfort hug, and she won't be insulted by the action. However, if she is feeling the same way, she shouldn't be able to resist the eye-to-eye look you will be giving her, and she will kiss you.\n\nI hope you have a wonderful experience with your friend, and whatever happens, please don't let your friendship suffer.
245959
you really have to ask her what's the deal with what happened.but since i assume that she's your bestfriend,then i say that don't let a guy come between friendship.no matter how much you love him.and IF she wants him for herself and she lets this guy come between the two of you, then later down the road you won't be the one feeling guilty about a guy possibly ruining a beautiful friendship.
527115
If you tell her, your friendship will never be exactly the same due to her knowing your attraction to her. If you don't tell her, it could be something that you will regret and will eat away at you, and from what you have said it is already really bothering you. Even though it could alter your friendship, you can't keep acting that you are only interested in her as a friend. Since you care about her so much to memorize a speech for her I don't think it is something that you can keep from her much longer, so go ahead and tell her. She has already told you that she is both a lesbian and bi, so I don't know how interested she will be but at least you will have told her and not keep asking yourself why you haven't done so yet.
609852
I would say it's just like kissing a boy, but if you are a tradionalist who wants the "guy" to make the first move (like me) I know how confusing it can be.  Just wait 'til the moment's right, when y'all are alone.  You can compliment her or do something to get a little closer (the dumbest thing I ever did was take off my glasses and say, "look, they're broken," and as soon as she looked up, puzzled, I kissed her) and then just let things take their course!  Of course, all that is assuming you know she's be ok with that, because, not to burst your bubble, but it's one thing to be ok with your best friend being attracted to you, and another for her to feel something back.  If everything is go, just don't force anything, and have fun!  ; )
247399
It was in her parents camp trailer and neither one of us knew what we were doing.  But we tried our best and we both certainly enjoyed it a whole heck of alot.  And then it just kind of became something that we did alot, you know, to get better at it.  Then we got into a fight because I really am gay and she was just experimenting and never f**ked again...  It was sad...  Now we are friends again, after like 10 years, and we talked about it and she was just afraid of the whole gay thing and her very religious family...  \n\nOk - bla bla bla whatever... \n\nbye
526070
luk you need to explain it to her and let her know what happen...if she is a really good friend then she will understand..itz both of your fault because yall both did it and yall BOTH were drunk...but i mean if she isnt a gud friend she won't listen and she isnt worth it...but sometime in the next few dayz you need to tell her you understand wat you did waz wrong and you need to say your srry and tell her it waz stupid of you but it waznt just your fault and you and him need to sit down and talk to her and let her know BOTH of you need to take the blame not just YOU..well good luck...best of wishes i hope it turnz out good=)
199226
It's a little difficult to tell just from your description, but from first instinct, I would say no, she's probably not a lesbian. Girls like to have physical intimacy with their friends, not in a sexual way, just to feel close with someone who supports them and who they love, again, in a friend way. I know it may seem odd to you because guys typically feel weird being too close, but think about the way you feel about your friends or teamates. You know you can depend on them to help you out, right? And that if you're in trouble, they'll have your back. And even if you don't need help, they'll be there every day just to be your friends. You probly punch each other around or hit each others fists when you meet up or whatever. Girls are just different. If you're picking up a vibe from other things, well, you may want to talk to her about it. She may just be experimenting, in a very small way. A lot of girls do, especially high school and college. It doesn't necessarily mean they are gay. In your girlfriend's case, it's probably nothing to worry about. It doesn't even sound like experimenting. I'd let it go.