I am located in Japan with the US military. My home town is a little town on the beach in Mississippi. I just now was able to visit and see the damage of Katrina. It hurt! Very much hit home for me. My husband is getting kicked out of the military and now we are trying to find work and a place to stay in my home area. My grandmother down there has altimerz (however you spell it), my mother is having mini strokes, and I have everyone else in my family telling me to drop everything that help them both out. Everyone in my family has their own problems, even myself. I haven't even started school. I want to try and work things out with my husband of three years because things have not been going in the right direction, but I have my family bearing down on me like wolves. I love my mother to death and my grandmother, but I want to have my own life. Is this wrong? And can I do both if I have no work experience and need to start school? I have a older brother in medschool near them. Why me?
213921
seek God an Pray.....:)
412934
I am kinda in the same situation.  I am from Michigan and we are in California right now.  I am not happy here and I miss my family.  Our kids are here with us but I think it is going to come down to me leaving him.  I just want to do whats best for our children. They don't like it here either. I don't think he will ever go back there. I am just praying about it so maybe you should do the same.
312378
Is there any family that you can live with in Co until you finish school? This is really rough on you. I would talk to your parents and see if there is someway you could stay to finish school there. Moving before your senior year is really hard on a young person. ( I say young cause I'm 51) Tell them how you feel, maybe something can be worked out so at least you can graduate from the school you have been going to. Good luck, I hope it works out for you.
121326
i know EXACTLY what your talking about. for every year i was in middle school and jr high (like 4 years) i lived in a different town and once 2 towns in like 1 school year. my dad got married and kept seperating and getting back together with my step mom and every time he did we moved. it was so hard, but the one thing i gained from it was i learned that now i cand handle any change like that that comes my way because i have already gotten through it. i just moved again to go to college this year, and it was easier because i have learned how to put myself out there and meet new people. plus i have all these experiences with different people and places that other people my age dont have. if it makes you feel any better i shed my share of tears too, and im not a cryer. it is normal to feel that way. good luck. email me if you need anything.
575611
Well I went through the same things so I can tell you EXACTLY what she have to expect to happen. He is already in the army and at his duty station, which mean that she is NOT in his orders. They can get married but they are NOT going to move her or the kids (if any) because they weren't married BEFORE he got the orders. So as far as the military is concerned, the marriage mean NOTHING. After he comes back home for good or get orders to be stationed somewhere else then its a process (About 2-3weeks) (maybe shorter or longer) to get in the DoD system) he have to go through to get his wife and the kids (if any) in the system so that they can be included in his orders next time. My husband is in the Marines and he got orders to Japan. We got married after he received his orders so i had to wait until his two year were up (which will be next month) before me and our child were included in his orders. So from next month on out me and our daughter will be able to travel with him where-ever he goes....if I can answer any more questions just let me know, cause I KNOW 1st hand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As far as housing goes once he is stationed at another base or whateva they an get on base housing (if available) if not he can get BHA (Basic Housing Allowance)...which will pay for them to live in civilian housing off-base. So they can get married and YES it can work out even though there is a HIGH divorce rate for the military..it all depends on them if they willing to make it work...(Its hard at times though but they just have to be strong)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
211455
You sound like a very stubborn guy, and I don't blame you.  You've been there a long time and should be entitled to stay.  But your town is going to hell in a handbasket.  the situation's probably not going to get a lot better in your lifetime.  Think about this:  What are you proving?  That you can put up with anything?  Let it go, Pal.  Find a nice, comfortable place, where you can go down the steet to have a coffee with a neighbor, sit in the sun and read the paper, whatever.  You only have one life.  Make the rest of it the kind of life you'd like to live.  Nobody's going to give you a medal for staying.
151958
yes it is better for you to get out of the house if you and your mom are like oil and water (they don't mix)and you don't need the depression.  If I were you I would get a job even within walking distance (if possible) and save and have someone take you to get your license (a co worker, friend) and then save more to get your own place and you could do it although if you are in school DO NOT QUIT for no reason finish and then do whatever
551507
Hi Kallie,,\n  The first and most important thing that i want to say is,, your husband is one lucky guy !!!!!  You are quite beautiful..  Hope he treats you right..\n\n I see your a Southern girl also,,, and i work out of your states cajun capitol ,, Lafayette,,, lol... \n Naturally, i am in the oil business and on a drilling rig as we speak here..250 miles due South of New Orleans.. we catch out of Houma...\n  I am from the Magnolia state next door to you,, i live in a small town near Jackson, the capitol and am a geo-engineer .. I travel around the world doing my type work and love it quite a lot.. \n With your husband being an architect you should have no problems going to college..\n\n good luck,, and let me know if (billy bob) dont treat you right!!!
547280
Good gosh man you are still here?  You really need a life bad.  Everybody with sense stopped listening to your BS a long time ago.  The only one with dellusions of this stuff happening is you, seriously if your father really was in the Navy like you claim.  I bet he disowned you for all of this.  This is all your way of getting attention, find a better hobby.
590478
Well what I wanted to be always bothered my mother.  She's a very strong and independent woman who feels you should never rely on anyone otherwise you'll be let down.  Anyway, I've always wanted to be a great wife and an even better mom.  I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom so that my children wouldn't have to be in daycare.  I know this isn't considered a career but I've served in the military, been a used car salesman, worked retail, worked at a movie theater and even worked fast food and this is by far the toughest and most rewarding job I've ever had.  This always worried my mom.  She was afraid I'd get married and he'd leave me and I have all these kids with no money.  She also though I'd be bored out of my mind!  Well, I found my prince charming and we are happily married and expecting our second child this Christmas.  I honestly couldn't be happier and my mom sees this (and knowing what a good man my husband is) is no longer worried about me not earning an income.  When my children are all in school, I do want to get a part-time job so I can bring some kind of money into the house but as long as my kids are at the house, that's where I'll be.
81982
I hate to say it but if he has a good job then ooooh God this is gonna sound awful coming from a female!  lol  BUT your place as his wife is to support him in his job and his career choice.  You can make a home anywhere as long as you have him with you.  THATS what matters!  I know u r feeling home sick and miss your family.  My hubby was military for 16 years and I TRULY hated moving all the time but it was ok as long as we were together as a family.  See if you can arrange a time when u can fly home for a few days a year to visit.  Put up all kinds of your family photos around you.  Get the family share plan on the phones and you can talk free alllll day long!  Good luck to you!  Once u begin to make friends you might just change your mind!
239313
Oh My God, that is a terrible and sad story. I really wish that I knew what to tell you or at least had some good advise. Being kicked out of my girlfriends house just a few months ago, I can relate to some of what you are going through. You will have hard times and sadness for a long time no doubt. But believe it or not, it does get easier as time goes by. That does not help you right now I know, and for that I am also sorry. There really isnt anything that I can tell you or that anybody can tell you really that will ease your pain and suffering. But for sure you need to keep your head about you and do whatever it takes to get you and your son through this horrible time in your life. I can be your e-mail pal/friend if you want, and again I wish I had some quick-fix remedy. Keep your chin up. (smile)
648952
We're all placed in stressful situations sometimes that are difficult to cope with. My best advice to you is to look at the positive side of things. The fact that you have a job and an income is a good thing. The fact that you are using a computer to access the Internet is a great privilege (believe me it's a privilege). The fact that you were raised in this great nation is an opportunity. You sound young and you entire life is ahead of you. This is only a chapter in your life. A chapter is bound to end when another begins. Have patience and faith in yourself and in your ability to change your perception of your situation. Thank God for the moments that you have. Remember, this is life, not a dress rehearsal. Make everyday count. And finally, I have personally found that I feel a lot better when I stop focusing on my own problems and try to offer help to someone else. We get so focused on self sometimes that we forget that there are people out there who are in a much worst situation than us. Try to lend a helping hand to someone, and you will see how blessed you will become.
43737
I'd like to help but, i have no information and what kind of career choice your thinking of.More information please.I mean what's your calling? Have you ever thought about being a missonnary in a different country ?Salavation army or a shelter maybe, like part time?I've been thinking on your question and this one is really tough.To actually still make a well enough wage to feed your family and to want to try enough to actually find how you can help others.I think your a good person that i love to have as a next door neighbor.I think on your problem is over my head.I'm sorry and i wish you and your family all the best life can give.
319705
The tough choice in life, i was in a similar situation a long time ago, the first question is, do you have a good support system or the father of your children that can help take care of your children temporarily till you get your life together, it seems from this letter that you have to prioritize with  what you have to do before you end up homeless. My only suggestion is survival and a strong will get you through, and only you can help yourself even if there are tough decision you have to make in order to survive.  always, empathy in CT
250212
Money isn't everything.  But you didn't say how long you've given Japan a try.  I think you should stick it out at least a year.  You are always home sick at first and then things click and get better.  Not to mention what learning about another culture can do for you.  I mean it isn't like it is forever if you don't want it to.  Agree on a time length things don't improve then take steps to improve your life.
339257
Wow!  That is quite a burden for a young man just starting out.  I live in the US.  Here and in most western societies it is common for women to work to help support the family.  I've been married for 28 years and did not work only when my children were very small.  Once they went to school I went to work.  How else can a family have a decent home and vehicles?  I'm sorry that your girl's family rejected you - maybe it wasn't meant to be?  Once you graduate and are in a better position financially try again.  Hopefully your girl will still be unattached and available if not then you know she wasn't meant for you and your real mate is out there waiting for you to find her.  I wish you good luck.