How-when-do you calm down after a fight with you boyfriend or husband? My lady is been mad at me since two days...what helps you to calm down, even after you have been proven wrong?
200591
It takes time ,but if u agree that u r wrong for the time being,it will make her think for a while.It gives two opportunities\n 1.Fight over\n 2.You can talk about it freely
562442
Tell him. As a woman I know how easy it is for us to get into the classic withholding information/anger/feelings behavior, and say our favorite line when queried if something is wrong, "nothing". But men aren't stupid and they always know that "nothing" means "something", so instead of playing mind games about it, be honest and tell him - honestly. The key to any relationship is honesty. I am not talking about brutal, cut-his-throat honesty, as this will only make matters worse and make the argument bigger than what it is. I am speaking of the kind of honesty where you say something like this: "I am angry with you because I feel you did not ________ or "I feel you did _______ and this offended me." The key is to add "I feel" statements, rather than "You did" statements, as the latter puts the person on the defensive, and that will create another argument, though less intense than one generated by angry, blame and attack filled words.\n\nRemain neutral and calm. This is very, very hard to do in the heat of an argument. If the timing is not right and you are still too pissed off to tell him, address it at another time. You must remain calm and measured in your tone of voice. Be neutral and don't allow yourself to get emotionally plugged in to his reaction, which may be angry or defensive. If you have to, pinch yourself in the thigh to make sure that you remain calm and listen carefully to what he has to say!  Do not, no matter how hard you want to do this, interrupt.  If you feel that you are going to explode, then you need to excuse yourself and be alone for awhile. If you feel he is going to explode, you need to do the same.\n\nBeing honest and upfront about any anger induced situation (or anything for that matter) AT THE MOMENT IT HAPPENS is also key. Or, if not at that precise moment, later on in the day or a few hours later is also fine because it is still fresh in your combined memories. You know, as I do, that women tend to put off expressing their feelings (though not all women) and we allow cumulative anger to be built up inside of us until the tops of our heads want to blow off when we get angry. When we are triggered by the proverbial last straw, we explode and what was once a teeny, tiny stupidity, becomes a volcano, overflowing with lava! Everything he has ever done to you since you first met will be drawn out in single file and used as weapons, including the time when he looked at you the wrong way when you were tired. This is not productive. This not healthy for your relationship or YOU. Stress fouls up everything and makes you sick, so deal with things calmly and rationally when they happen. And as for those 5,000,000 things he did before? Let them go. If you didn't deal with them THEN, they are moot points now.  \n\nAs an aside, I am a patient sort who lets a lot of stuff roll off my back. However, at the same time, I have a very, very long memory and a temper when I am exceedingly provoked. When my hubby used to piss me off, I'd bring out the big guns and would go on the offensive. Every thing he ever did or said to me would come out, and the original thing that bothered me got lost in the emotional insanity. Not productive. Now? I tell him what I feel. Consequently, our issues are resolved quickly - and that is a relief!
112723
Yesterday when my boyfriend was supposed to pick me up at 5:45 and he showed up at 6:30... he was at home playing his video game and lost track of time.  It ruined the whole night because I was mad and was chewing him out... We never made it to dinner or the movie we had planned on seeing.  The whole night was pretty much ruined... I've never yelled at him like that and he knew he was in for it... At least he got the hint that I was fed up with his constant tardiness and that I wouldn't put up with it.  Today my throat was hoarse and itchy from the yelling I gave him.
23255
One thing I learned from my first marriage is to pick your battles. There is no sense in getting into arguments that are over the small things that are part of the person you are with or that you yourself contribute too. Its very hard to admit to ourselves that we also instigate the arguments but once youve done that try and figure out if making a mountain out of a molehill is really worth it, I dont know which are the things that are making you so mad but always try to communicate b4 it becomes an issue.
516379
I just got over a relationship where my best friend (who was also his x girlfriend) and him kept staying friends. I didnt really let him know how much it bothered me, but now that i look back, it totally bothered me... and now that were not together, im so glad its over because that issue was so annoying, not worth dealing with. Tell him to loose her and if he can't, drop him!
636317
OH MY GOD !!\nDeja Vu, You remind me of me and my ex girlfriend. \nWe were together for 3 plus years. We used to fight so regularly that in the beginning our friends used to be shocked by the anger and in the intensity. But we used to end up kissing and making up. But as we moved on, our fights became a forthnightly event, and our friends just ignored it like it was a 'normal thing'\nBut I used to do all the things, you mentioned in your Q. Go in front of her house, we used to give each other missed calls and sometimes prank calls, we used to have our friends call eachother and find out how the other person was doing, and so on a so forth.\nBut fights in a relationship are NEVER healthy and mind you, it will get old and you will sometimes cross that line of sensitivity, therefore inadvertantly hurting the other persons more than you thought you would.\nHe (like my gf) might be of the false impression that fights are 'normal and important' to keep the love in a relationship.\nTry and convince him that this is not normal, NEVER.\nYou should set some ground rules and learn not to overstep eachother.\nI understood we fought as often as we did, because we lacked trust and respect for the other.\nTake one day at a time. You will never go wrong.
197491
Hi try walking away when the fighting starts and cooling down, when you both have a minute 2 cool down try and talk about it this has worked for me and I think it can help you
287735
I actually just told my husband to leave me alone the other day,but he asked me what was wrong and I said,'hormones...just leave me alone'. He did though and I felt better after having some time to myself. I think your husband needs to realize that no one is happy all of the time. We all need time to ourselves and it is good for you and good for the marriage to be able to take this time. As for having a big blow-out about it...I would've walked away. I don't take that crap anymore. It isn't worth it to me to talk til I'm blue in the face,trying to explain 'why'. I shouldn't have to. An argument doesn't really get you anywhere. I tend to wait until things have settled down and then have a conversation about it and find out what he is feeling then. I gave up a long time ago on trying to justify myself to him. We actually have a better marriage this way. Good luck to you.
278393
well...recently...I ended up cheating on my last boyfriend because he disappeared for two weeks then came back and ignored me for a week and I didn't know what was going on so when an old friend of mine put the moves on me about 50 times within one sitting...saying "no" got to be to hard. I should have just left, but I was so upset...I don't know what I was thinking.
3336
Right in the middle of an "argument" jump in & point out to both of them that they fight & argue constantly. Point out the fact that it is very childish & how tired you are of it. Whatever the underlying problem is between them should/will surface....once that surfaces, it can be resolved & harmony restored.
94336
Some women don't know how to get out of it. Like me. My ex had a major anger problem, he would fly off the handle for no apparent reason. At first I thought it was my fault, but after a while I knew better. I'm not sure why, but I couldn't leave, I loved him too much. Now looking back, I'm glad I eventually left. I'd probably be dead by now. Life is wierd. People make stupid decisions. I was smart, I got out.
590225
Well you could try explaining to them how it makes you feel and how it affects you. You may need to speak with them separately and when they are calm, Tell them how it makes you feel and that it hurts to hear them fighting and arguing as you love them both. It may help calm the disagreements, but it probably will not eliminate them.
66981
The next time you are NOT fighting say the same thing to her that you have just said to us.\nAnd then jsut listen. And also when she is upset just stop talking completely. Do not say one thing. This is a great trick. Say not ONE WORD.\nLet her be on the defensive for a change, let her do the apologising. It is a great feeling. Stop talking to her, use all your strength to do it. Even if it takes several days, stop talking to her and let her start wondering what she can do to make things right. Put the ball in her corner and let her see how it feels. You will be doing her a favor by teaching her a valuable lesson and you will help your self esteem which needs  a lot of help, I can tell.
65326
if you really love each other no it isnt time to end it. Me and My gf are going through a simuliar phase. Fights are expected in a realtionship. There are two people involved and two different views. SO you can expect fights. Me and My gf usually have at least one fight everyday. Manly this is my fault because I am under a lot of stress due to being so far in debt and working so many hours. I take a lot of it out on her although I dont mean to. My gf is going through the stage of life where she is making a lot of deciesions ( whatever that means I am not sure just what some mutual friends have told me) Therefore she gets upset at me alot. LOL But before the night is over we make sure everything is fine between us.   Good Luck I hop everything works out/
309645
no offence but he sounds like a dick! id dump him but considering you love him and you all are engaged sit down and freakin talk to him. i hate fights jus as much as you seem to.... its hard!
20429
Had the same situation happen to me.  I broke up a fight and was charged with battery.\n\nEverything was dropped once sanity was restored though.  As long as you didn't bash anybody too severely and backed off as soon as things were stopped you should be good.
147733
Well, it's up to you to find out the source of your anger. After you've done that, you should come up with a plan for how to handle the situation that provokes your anger -- like walk away, or think of squirrels like the one in my profile picture. It's really hard to remember this plan when the situation arises, but you have to beat it in there somehow.\n\nPerhaps the source of your anger isn't an event, but just an accumulation of events. If that's the case, take a vacation somewhere. Take some time off alone to relax -- isolate yourself from the things that anger you. Take up a hobby that'll allow you to vent your anger/frustrations. I actually highly recommend you weight-train or take up martial arts/boxing -- it does wonders for us guys, trust me.\n\nAnd lastly, LIGHTEN UP. LET THINGS GO. TURN EVERY BAD SITUATION INTO A COMICAL ONE. Not everything is perfect or goes as planned, so sometimes you just gotta sit and enjoy the ride.