Okay my mom has been on drugs (meth) for as long as I can remember, and for the past month or so she has told me that she's quit and she hasn't done it. I can't physically know because I live in AZ and she lives in SC.   Now I've heard this a lot, but this time I can tell over the phone that she probaby is. She sounds much more straight headed and I can acually carry on a conversation with her without be cut off half the time.  I'm afriad to really believe her though because last time I did I was only hurt to find out she was lying.  I don't know if I can take that risk again. Now do you think I should believe her or blow it off as one of her lies again? \n    If your gonna be an asswhole don't even bother answering this question.
207981
I think that you should believe her and give her a second chance. \n\nBut I would just kinda play it cool until you know weather or not she is lying. If she keeps on acting better over the next couple months then she probably is clean.\n\nBut dont put your self in the situation where you can get hurt. Dont get you hopes high just to have them stomped on. If she is clean great, but if she is not then just dont let it get to you. Just keep going on with your own life.
152635
How about *shock horror* being honest with your mom. i think you will find that a) she will be happier to know the truth about your friend. B) it will encorage her to trust you and c) your mom is gonna worry about you whether your friend smokes or not, give your mom the oppertunity to make up her own descions about your friend. Explain how you feel about smoking and maybe even try to encorage your friend to stop.
543694
Perhaps she is ashamed of her mothers illness, and thought you may think differently of her if you knew. Try not to be to hard on her, I am sure it was not an easy thing to do keeping this a secret. She probably thought she was doing the right thing. She may even be in some state of denial of her mothers illness. Good luck and God bless. And do not keep beating up on yourself, you did not know. The two of you need to have a talk, and explain to her that you want her to be honest no matter what it is.*
642892
There isn't much you can do.  She probably wouldn't listen to you if you did say anything to her.  Just let her be.  Even if she lies to people about you, I'm sure she won't stay credible to them for long.  Everyone will eventually figure her out.  Confronting her will just make her act like she's the victim of your "cruel" words.  She'll probably tell everyone just to get sympathy.
243001
She is a perfect girl going through stages in life a tough way. Thank God she is being caught and hopefully it will eventually make her come to her senses and change her pitifull lifestyle. We all learn through mistakes and for sure she will learn thru hers too. Many of us have done this and are now responsible citizens & its only when you have been through it that you really get shaped in life. I for one started drinking (heavily) at 18, had a baby when i was 14, had a number of abortions. Was in and out of home as a teenager, cohabited several times as a teenager and did other more worse things and learnt alot from all these mistakes.  Went back to school, and now a chartered marketeer, doing well, raising my son wonderfully and a devout christian. What am saying is your daughter will get through all this, just be there for her no matter what she does. My Mom loved me though I was what others regarded a rotten girl. She loved me and kept telling me I could do it I wasnt all that bad, and I made it. So hang in there and keep encouraging her. She will change. Above all else pray for her, God wont fail you.
225470
OMG!!!!!!!!!! I hate her already. First, tell her no calls past ____ (fill in the time). Say it wakes the kids. Next, if she goes to the store for you, tell her you need the exact change back, because you are saving up for ____. If she wants her kids to play with the toys, let her know that she can have them come over and play, (just watch that they don't leave with them). You have to be upfront with her and let her know that you feel that she is taking advantage of you. Explain all of the reasons. Ask her if she would like to be treated that way. Let her know that your household will no longer support her alchol problem......if she sneeks three beers out the back door that is stealing. Alchol (misspelled, sorry) is a legal drug, if she feels the need to steal it.....then she has a problem with it. Also, tell her that you will not support her smoking habit. If she is bold enough to buy smokes with your change again, aks to see them, then when she hands them to you, put them in your pocket, and say "Thank you". I'm sure she will wonder what you are doing. Say that she bought smokes with YOUR money, there for they are your to keep. I bet she will never do that again. As far as her saying stuff to get your husband in trouble....Let's say she saw your husband look at another chick, if she comes to you saying that, say, "Was she ugly? Cause I heard ugly rubs off. Tell him not to look at the ugly ones." (LOL) And, about bumming toilet paper, why would your mom let someone live there if she can't afford the bare essential??? Sounds like you sis-in-law has a problem about getting something for nothing, no matter what it might be.
174796
you should not believe him. i am a recovering addict, and i don't believe in using occasionally. it doesn't work that way. before long your bills and every thing will be behind. it is an expensive habit. i don't want to tell you to just leave your husband because that will make it worse for him. when my husband found out i was using he did tell me that if i didn't stop he would leave me and take my daughter. him and some of my other family has got me into Church and i have given my life to the lord. pray about it, God leaves no prayer unanswered. but we have to remember he doesn't answer them right when we want he answers them when it is the right time. now im not telling you to stay with him if he continues to use either. really open your heart to God and pray and he will put the answer in your heart what you should do.good luck and GOD BLESS YOU!!! if you need anyone to talk to you can email me or IM ME. MY im name is tootsjrfan.
590185
How about telling a "older friend" like a calm parent or teacher. Sound like the usual thing an adult would say but she does need help. She IS an alcoholic! Sleeping with a guy and not remembering it is called a black out. That is an alcoholic thing! Talk to her, be prepared for all the excuses. You will eventually lose her as a friend. lying is not far behind what she is doing. She won't remember what she has done so she will laugh it off or say "I did not do that" Someone older has got to help you for your friends sake! DO NOT let her suck you into her world of drinking. Sometimes drugs are not far behind. Be strong and tell someone, she needs HELP!
457800
Ok, I've read your history of questions. First you mention your mom doing something similar to this situation. Now your sister. I'm not sorry to say that I don't believe you for one second. You need to get off of Yahoo Answers and get a life.
419563
I am a recovering addict myself, and willing to share my story if it would help. I have now been clean for 4 months and have NO desire to go back to where I have been. I had been on drugs(meth, coke, crack,pot, pills, etc.), for 15 years too. Let me know how to contact you and I would be glad to talk to you about my experiences with drugs and recovery. I can totally relate!
269298
Call the police ASAP, my good friend spent every penny he had on the drug, he spent about $250 a week and lost his job and most all of his contacts.  I finally called the cops on him and he thanks me to this day for saving his life.  If I would of waited any longer, I don't know if he would of been around.  Know that you can call the police from a pay phone and not give them your name.  Please do your mother a favor and get her into treatment before it's too late.  This is a very serious thing, and I know you love her, please do the right thing and get her help.
25468
Be honest with her. Tell her that you don't believe drugs and smoking are the answer. Tell her you are concerned for her, and make it clear that you are ON HER SIDE.
468760
My mom smoked to and yesterday was her 20-day not smoking anniversary and she stopped like this:\nshe ate more so she wouldn't have the desire to smoke\nwe encouraged her everyday and promised a party for a whole month of not smoking\nwe didn't give her a chance to smoke\nand she saw me when she smoked and saw that every time I was coughing because I REALLY don't like that smoke...
256015
Hi Summer,\n I know that this is a very tough situation your in. On the one hand you love your Mom and don't want to do anything that may get her in trouble, and on the other hand you don't want to keep getting beatings when she gets drunk. You have to do something though. You cannot continue living like this. Let me first suggest that you sit down with her (when she is NOT drunk) and try to reason with her. Tell her you know she loves you and you love her, but it's not fair that she takes her anger out on you. Ask her to help you help her. See if there is anything she wants you to do that can make things easier for her. Maybe she should talk to someone, maybe a friend, priest or counselor. It is obvious that she has a drinking problem. Maybe Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) might help, but that is something she has to decide for herself, you cannot force her to go. I believe if you sit down and just talk to her when she is sober it will be a start. I wish you the best. If things do NOT get better then I suggest that you talk to a close family friend, if that does'nt help then you have a really tough decision to make. Yes you could run away, but I think that may make things worse. You could ask to go live with relatives until Mom gets her act together or you may eventually have to go to the authorities, that would be in my opinion the last resort. But if thats what's needed, then so be it. Once again good luck, stay strong and always believe that at some point things WILL get better one way or another. You WILL have happier days with your Mom, it just might take a little bit of time.
351833
First of all I'm sorry that you have a mother like that. And it's too bad your children can't have a good grandmother. Personally I wouldn't do anything. It's apparent she doesn't want real help. She just wants to continue using drugs while piling up on someone's couch. Besides you have to put your children first and she's not a good influence for them. It would be a danger for her to live with you. I know it's a hard decision but your children need a safe, loving environment.
139809
Hey, I'm actually at the opposite end of your situation and just found out that I had been lied to about her past for a good 18 months. It's really hard and I don't know what to do. I was absolutely head over heals for this girl, and now mentally it is starting to crumble because I don't know they truth. She also won't talk about it because it bothers her too much, which in turn makes me feel extremely guilty when I need questions answered Unfortunately, her unwillingness to be open about it is driving my stress levels ridiculously high. \nI guess, from my perspective, what I wanted her to do most was to ask for forgiveness, which she never did. It's been nearly 4 months since the incident and she still hasn't asked. I wanted - needed - that.\nI also just wanted her to be honest. Completely honest. People are so bad about telling white lies or playing down the truth and that's what makes the imagination run wild.\nI think the best thing you could do is to comfort her. Ask her to forgive you for what you did (if you're sorry). And be willing to answer any questions she may have - letting her know she may get answers she doesn't want to hear.\nI think, after that, if she can't get over it, she'll never get over it. I'm debating that option now.\nIf she's not going to get over it, you will have to make the realization that there are more girls out there (billions) and you'll find one that will be more accepting and just as great as this one.\n\nI wish the best to you and I hope my experience has helped your insight. Good luck!
276379
awww .. u can't make her stop sweetie.. im sorry.. Drug addiction is like a disease.. it changes your mums way of thinking.. My sister was a drug addict and she left her 4 children in our care. But after a few yrs she realised what the drugs were doing and she eventually gave them up  and got her kids back.. Let your mum,know that u love her no matter what,  and that u want to be with her all the time. Hopefully that will help her give them up so she can be with you. Your mum loves you very much Im sure but the drugs have a hold on her just now  :)