Granted, she was a counsiler, in her mid-30s, and she had short brown hair (which I'm just sucker for). She had a great sense of humor, simular viewpoints and what not (we could've very easily had been friends). Then when she said that she wouldn't mind helping me with my problems about meeting girls, and easing my worries about sex, I got a bit unnerved.\n\nJust would like to hear other people's experiences with this.
218407
Hi,\nI am a female social worker (therapist) and I have worked with male and female clients of all ages.  \n\nFirst of all, it is normal and common for people to be attracted to their therapist.  After all, this is a person who is listening to your problems, who is understanding and helpful.  This doesn't have to be a bad thing, the trust and connection that you feel to her may be helpful to the therapeutic process.  \n\nI just want to make it clear before I say the rest, that it is NEVER okay under any circumstances for a therapist to flirt with, date or meet a client outside of the office.  If your therapist happens to see you at the mall or something outside of therapy, technically, she shouldn't even say, "Hi," unless you do first.  Therapy is that serious and that confidential. \n\nIf you think your therapist is good at helping you and you want to keep seeing her as a therapist, then you need to tell her about your attraction to her.  If you are too nervous to say it, you can write it down or tell her you had a dream that you were attracted to her.  If she is a true professional, she will know exactly what to say, and she has probably dealt with this before.  Then, you guys can have a talk about it and move on to getting the help you need.  You'll probably find that your feelings go away after you talk with her and start working on your issues.   \n\nIf you think that you would never be able to get over the attraction that you feel to her or that it could be a barrier to your therapy (like you wouldn't want to talk about certain things because you would be afraid she might judge you, etc.), you either need to keep the dialogue going with her on these issues or get a different therapist.  I'm sure she would be happy to give you the name of a colleage.  Like I said, don't worry, it happens all the time.  \n\nThe good part about this is, if you have any fears of talking to women about difficult subjects, this will help you conquer that - and in a very safe environment.  That's what therapy is all about: dealing with difficult issues in a safe environment.\n\nGood for you for getting therapy and for not being afraid to ask your question.  For your own sake, so you get the most out of your therapy, I really do think you should talk to her though.  It will be fine :)
291377
Absolutely not!  My female friends give me a perspective of life I cannot get from guys.  I am attracted to intelligent women who are interested in more than who's the current hot celeb, or who's with who - who's dumped who.  Getting fresh views of the war, the economy, ethics ... it's very refreshing getting a women's view of the world.
109441
I think its awesome. I know for a fact that I've missed out on many great opportunities simply because I did not think the girl was interested in me. Or even worse, I was too worried about being rejected. My wife of 10 years persued me. I never even knew she felt like that about me. Just think, if she never made "the move" we would probably not be so happy together right now. I say go for it. It was perfectly fine back then and its more acceptable now.
452616
"Yes", I certainly have. But, in my situation it was the other way around.. I got into a really "Bad, ugly marriage" for 7 years, and my best-friend, who I'd known since we were 12 & 13, would go and tell all our other friends all of my domestic problems, and I'd tell them to her in "The strictest Confidence", well when he & I devorced, it was like she didn't want anything to do with me .. It was as if she liked it when I was all down in the dumps, and being abused.. And someone to talk about.. Once, she no longer had anyone too "Gossup" about, it was like she had no time for me. Not to mention she was so insecure, I think she was worried I'd put the moves on her hubby being that I was now "Single" and all.. She would talk badly of me, behind my back, to some of our closest friends who would in turn tell me.. Because, they knew me better than that.. And that she was all "Full of it"!! She just wasn't happy, unless, I was going through something bad, how sad, is that!! Nor did she have any time for me, unless she had something bad to tell everyone about me!! When things were going really well for me, was always the really quiet times, that's when I never heard from her. How sad is that?!! My family always told me, she was just "Jealous" of me! Oh well, I saw her, 2 summers ago, and we played "Catch-up", she owns a home down the street from my father-in-law.. And when she found out that this same house will be left to my daughter,when he passes,,away, and that being that its a corner-lot, worth probably a good 2-3 million dollars, that her little house didn't hold a candle to what my daughter will inharet, one day.. she was so mad, she couldn't contain herself.. She kept argueing with her husband in front of me, that thier house would be well worth more, one day.. He had to shut her up finally by telling her, Kelly its a corner-lot, our's isn't !!! Dah-Heart!!! So, I totally understand, how you feel... I love her, she's like "Family" I've known her so many years.. But, I cant stand that side of her. Its really sad, that she's not happy unless she has someone to put down, or to make herself feel better, she just has to have someone to put down.. I feel sorry for her, more than she hurts me, you know. Oh well.. I would just have a talk w/ your friend and try to get him in on some of your "Successes" along with you. That might just be part of his problem. He wants to grow with you, and be up there along with you, you know. Otherwise, you two dont really have alot in common, and may make him feel alienated, from you & your friendship, you know.. Just allow him to take part in some of your successes some how, and that might help your friendship, or just dont bring things up to him, if his friendship really means alot to you....Then dont share your "Achievements" with him anymore... You know.. Sad, but that might be what you have to  do to save your friend from being insecure around you...
326594
I've had a bad experience with dating a girl that I'd been friends with. It was pretty awkward, both of us knew eachother and what we like with the exception of relationship needs. I was so used to us just being friends that I made minimal moves. Unfortunately, she believed in the man making all the moves. She eventually got bored and went after someonme else.
580968
SNAP!!!!!!\n\ndid the same thing with a guy i met on her too. stayed up all hours just chatting about stuff and listing old songs! \n\nok, here's what i think. when you meet someone you just 'click' with, it is easy to get carried away with yourself and be consumed with it all. thats not to say that there is not anything serious there. all i am saying is reality is often different to fantasy.\n\nme and the guy i'm still chatting too met a couple of weeks ago. he is a great guy but i think we both felt that reality was a little different. we still chat and i am due to see him again shortly.\n\nwhat we decided was to take things slowly, get to know eachother better as friends as see what develops from that. it's the most sensible option i think.
530496
this lady seemed completely fascinated by your looks - it does seem like a wonderful combination.  \nOther than that - people are just people and there is no guarantee that you will like a particular race of persons more than another.  The only think that I can ever believe will work is to be yourself no matter who you meet and try to get to know a person before going to far with the physical part of the relationship.  But sounds like you know that because you are waiting and taking the time to think about what the lady said.\nI don't think it matters if she was serious or not, only what you believe.  \nHope you enjoyed your meal!  But it just proves once again what I have always told my children - there is no such thing as a free lunch.  God Bless!
469593
Depends on her interests...I always liked it when the men i dated picked activities they know I liked.  It was always annoying when they offered options, too.  \nHave fun!
3478
Yes, a woman with whom I was a really good friend (I will call her Jane) just turned on me and almost refuses to talk to me now. We don't live near each other anymore, so it's not as big a deal now as it once was. But I have no idea what I did or said to turn her against me. I am one who has really good relationships with people and long-term friendships. So this really took me by surprise.\n\nJane and I used to spend hours together every week and a lot of time on the phone. We were both members of the same professional association. I saw her there and she was really rude to me like I had offended her in a big way. \n\nI am still mystified by this situation and it took place nearly eight years ago. I was told, by a mutual friend who asked me about the break up that Jane had done this in other relationships. That made me feel a little less confused, but I am still saddened by the loss of what I considered a great friendship.
322922
LOL...well I'm already in an alternate kinda likestyle, but I can remember my youth and not knowing the right way to ask for oral when the girl faltered in her knowledge.\nMost times I ended up teaching about what to do in bed so I had to talk or guide. I grew out of not talking to my female friends quickly, and I learned they needed and enjoyed the guidance.
127326
Honestly it sounds like he was playing the field. I'm not saying he didn't like you, but maybe he was seeing other people at the same time. Guys like to do this, especially older men with younger women, they think it makes them feel younger. I'm glad you have a sense of self respect, never let it go!! :)
574127
I was 19.  She was 17.  Yeah, I realized the age at the time.  We were friends before.  I won’t get into that here.  We got together.  We messed around a lot - mostly making out, petting and a lot of oral.  She kept expressing how much she wanted to do it.  I just didn’t know if it was the right time.  Primarily it was because we never had any contraception around. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted it badly.  I didn’t even care if it was going to be my first time.  I wasn’t nervous.  I just wanted to be safe for both of us.  She had only one other partner, a long-term boyfriend that she broke it off with.  She kept asking me to “go for it” in all our other encounters.  This time, in the heat of it, when she asked me to make love to her, I whispered, “Go for it.”  Then she stripped herself then me.  We still didn’t have ANY form of contraception.  But the time was right.  Go figure. After we both climaxed, she was so satisfied but puzzled.  We went for a while.  She kept asking me … and this was a question that she kept asking me during our entire relationship … was I really a virgin.  I said yes.  That was the truth.  She said she’s had a virgin.  Her friends have had virgins.  And none worked it like I did.  I told her I wouldn’t know. I just went with what I felt and what felt good for the both of us.  I don’t know what the big deal was but shortly thereafter; she harbored this idea that I had a mistress on the side that I “practiced” with. (Her long-term boyfriend did.) Needless to say we went several rounds that day … and night … and following morning.  But, alas, the whole relationship was just that – based on sex.  No emotional connection at all.  It ended.\n\nSo I guess my point is that your first time is a big deal, but the euphoria and importance of it will fade and just become a memory.  Don’t make it more than it is, just a right of passage for any human being, the emotional creatures we are.\n\nGood luck
2831
I agree with the suggestion to maybe tell her she could bring a friend along when you meet for the 1st time, this would put her more at ease and make her feel safer.\nI notice that you said you met on your phone..I assume a telephone chat line??Have you exchanged pics??\nShe also seems like she has maybe been in some not so great situations and has some concerns about guys just wanting to meet her for sex??\nHave you discussed this with her??Does she know what it is that you are looking for clearly??\nIF you are not looking for sex but rather are interested in her without sex being a focal point..do what you can to reassure her of that.\nGood Luck
198583
I was 16yrs old, and on vacation with my family in Texas.  I met the girl who was a friend of my cousins there.  we hung out alot and ended up at a friends house late one night and we had sex.  It was great for me, but not so great for her.  I had no experience and I was done before she got started!  It was not a one night stand though.  We had sex several more times.  It was special to me, and I will never forget her.
247399
It was in her parents camp trailer and neither one of us knew what we were doing.  But we tried our best and we both certainly enjoyed it a whole heck of alot.  And then it just kind of became something that we did alot, you know, to get better at it.  Then we got into a fight because I really am gay and she was just experimenting and never f**ked again...  It was sad...  Now we are friends again, after like 10 years, and we talked about it and she was just afraid of the whole gay thing and her very religious family...  \n\nOk - bla bla bla whatever... \n\nbye
502682
Yes and No. Yes its shallow, because maybe she was just nervous when she was asking you out. You know most women don't do that very often, so when she was asking you out she probably reverted back to how she sounded in high school or something. Also you could have been a bit closed off and you didn't express in anyway that you were open to her asking you out. So that causes more nervousness in some women.  Now for the no part of it, I think if a person that is a sales rep and has had a college education, they should be capable of delivering a decent proposal to ask anyone out. I mean they have had the training to be able to talk to clients and different people like that, so I don't see why she couldn't used those same skills to ask you out properly. But just for the record that was funny as hell, "Like harder Benny!" Totally classic, dude.
109037
Not all women are intimidated by other women with positive features.  I for one am not intimidated (maybe a little envious-ha ha).  I say good for you!!