Im 25, in high school i got good grades, everyone says im smart, but i just cant get my life together. I didnt finish college, every time i get a job I quit after 6 0r 7 months, I got imto debts then just stopped paying now I just cant pay because there too much. I cant keep a steady relation ship with a guy so im constantly moving back to my parents house, or to the next boyfriend's house. I have this insane fear of getting old, and worse of all, Im afraid of dying. I used to go to church and pray alot, but I just feel ignored by God. Its hard to belive that I will die and never exist again. I'm always afraid of taking desicions and then regreting them and not beeing able to correct them.Where cant I turn for help?
211365
seems like you need hope or something to motivate and make you want to go forward. People always find themselves in those places where it seem that you have hit the bottom and cant get out. Usually people find hope in churches and religions, some turn to themselves and meditate, others find a thing to do (an activity) that they think is worth persuing and ultimately gets them out of the hole. Without much info about who you is hard to help you, I would advise a counselor to help you get yourself together and help you chose the right path for yourself.
593094
First, get help.  You should not be feeling so hopeless.  You might need medication to help.  Please tell a parent or someone to get you help.\n\nSecond, what about finding something to make your time useful.  Sometimes by helping others, we help ourselves even more.  Volunteering is a wonderful experience.  Is there a homeless shelter in your area?  If not you could go to a nursing home and play checkers with someone who doesnt' have visitors.  Go to a children's ward at a hospital and read to patients.  Contact the red cross in your area and ask them what things you could volunteer to do. \n\nThird, you do have a reason to be alive.  You might not know what it is right this moment, but you have many years ahead of you to find out what it is.  Good luck, please get help!
75294
At 46 your life is only beginning! Are you currently taking any antidepressants? If not you may want to consider this. I'm 46, have been for a couple of months and i'm still figuring out what my life is all about. Life is an adventure! Every day you can discover something new, learn something new, do something different. As humans we are constantly changing, learning and growing! Imbrace your life and thank the Lord  for the divine intervention that has allowed you to remain here. Pray and ask God to show you why you were spared. He must have a purpose for you, seek it and go out and accomplish the goal that God has set for you. Never give up.
559793
man, i feel bad for you. you're playing on the wrong team. God is so real. it seems like everyday he's proving himself (to me anyway). i mean there are times i look back and it could have only been God that got me through. God gives me peace, protection, and he is a great provider. My first year in college I didn't have a job or a dime to my name, but God made a way for me. He made is so that I was never hungry, and that I never wanted for anything. to you God might be an "invisible friend" but for me he is my best friend. the bible is a guide that tells us how to live. and if people live right they dont have to fear God. he gave his only son for us, do you really think that he wants to destroy us? to cripple us with fear? No, thats not him, he is loving. I'm sorry if you feel that God has failed you, or that he's not real, because you're missing out.
256792
Listen. I'm 16 and im still tryin to find that out. U just gotta keep talkin 2 god and dont stop going 2 church. all u can do is pray. At this age and time im at right now, I feel the same way u do. Just keep being faithful to God the best way u can. HE will eventually give u hints on what to do wit ur life.
371591
Forget what other people are doing with there lives, someday it will hit them and they will have things not going for them also.\nYou have to think positive and praying helps also. Talk to a professional counselor at school, maybe you are going in the wrong career direction. Or perhaps you need to get away for the day, by yourself to just think on what you want to do with your life.
10978
Have you ever read about Job.  He went through many many many trials and he still prevailed.  I know life can be rough at times and unfortunatly you will continue to go through hard times, they really never end.  But remember, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.  Turning away from your faith would be the wrong thing to do.  It's not that God isn't listening or answering your prayers.  He does listen and he will answer them.  God loves you very much, even when no one else seems to.  You should try talking to your preacher or someone in your church that you can trust. Tell them how you are feeling.  I suggest getting a prayer partner, someone who will help you pray for your needs.  Try smiling as much as you can today.  That will make you feel better too.  Good luck and God bless.
199305
what do you do as a job? i found that i had to change my attitude in a lot of different areas of my life. i don't know exactly what i'd suggest for you since i'm not sure what type of work you do. are you religious at all? that is something i got away from and i found myself sinking deeper and deeper into anger and despair. have you talked to your doctor about it? i have had to stay on an antidepressant. my family has a history of depression. sometimes we just have chemicals in our brains that are out of whack. it is hard to deal with life if your brain isn't working properly. i have made myself always look on the bright side. i dont' know you, but as a starter, you can be happy that you have a roof over your head and at least some type of employment. i honestly know how you feel. please don't consider killing yourself. i don't know how many times i made passive/aggressive attempts to harm myself. i was wreckless and i did not care at all. it's an awful feeling. i really suggest you talk to a doctor. psychological sickness is the same as physical sickness. some people do not understand that. there are methods to heal yourself. please talk to someone. i'll say a prayer for you.
255894
I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I'm having trouble getting back to school also because I and my family are too poor. I want to be a psychologist, a counselor. All you can do is wait and have faith that what is meant to happen will happen. In the mean time work hard. God(whichever one you believe in) helps those who help themselves. :^)
246563
I'm really sorry to hear you are struggling. You seem to have hit a rough patch, but don't give up on yourself. You are making some great progress in your life: \n1) You are holding a job. Okay, so the job sucks, but it won't be forever. Keep an eye out for other opportunities.\n2)  You are working on  your education. Your grades may not be stellar right now, but you can change that, too. \n3) As a student, you have access to the school's resources, like Career Services, who can  help you find a better job, improve your skills, update your resume, and become excellent at interviewing. You can also speak to academic counselors that can guide you to tutoring help (often free) and emotional counseling support. \n4) You are trying, and if you speak to your landlord or creditors to make an arrangement, you may find a sympathetic ear. They probably won't write off your debt, but they may give you an extra week or so to collect the money. \n5) You are recovering. You've made many of the hard steps already. Don't give up. See your counselor and get more support. \n\nThese things show me that you are strong, you just need to trust in your ability to make it through this. And when you do, you will have proof of your resilience. You may need a good cry, but don't give in to saddness. Collect all your skills and go change your circumstance. \n\nBest wishes.
16932
I sure can imagine what you are going through, but what don't kill you will definately make you stronger.Adversity builds character, and all bad experiences are lessons to be learned.  He may have ripped your heart into a million little pieces, but he cannot rip your spirit.\nIf you believe in God, know that he always has a bigger and better plan for us and there is someone who is deserving of a wonderfully made human being, which is you.\nBelieve that you are worthy of love and to be loved, we all have to grieve, cry, and feel pain that we think will never go away, but trust me it will.  Just say to yourself good ridance to bad rubbish and pray that God gives you the strength to put one foot in front of the other.\nIn time you will be good as new, with lots of experiences to share with others that need it.\nTake care.
284825
have you left your house in this time at all?  Just checking cause if you haven't you may want to arrange to see a specialist.  Anxiety is help by changes in diet, exercise (even a walk and some vitamin D will do you some good), sometimes medication either temporary or permanent (if it helps) may take the edge off and allow you to get on with normal functioning.  Do you have medical coverage from this job? You could pursue help with that route and maybe take a medical leave if they were willing to work with you, but since you have neglected to even notify them of the circumstances they may not work with you on this one.  The following site has some good information on it, I encourage you to browse around.  If you are legitimately suffering...you should know that it may not be a weakness on your part but an illness that may be treatable in time.\n\nbest of luck,\n\ntharedhead\n\nIn the mean time I did locate this story on being afraid of dying, so much so that you don't want to live...maybe it would have some insights that may benefit you.
200168
I wish there were a simple answer to this. It is especially challenging because you have lost your social NETwork of friends and confidants.(*Net, because it'll catch you if you fall.)\n\nIt sounds like your life as you know it already has ended. In a relationship-focussed world anyway.\n\nIf you can, I recommend embracing that and totally starting over. Commemorate the death of your old life by burning keepsakes. (letters, movie stubs, etc.) and then, if you can, ... move.\n\nI know that's durastic, but extreme times call for extreme measures. Unfortunately I get the feeling that you are still in highschool, or just starting college. (*the friends thing tipped me off, I'm not psycic.) Living with your parents or alone in an appartment can make it hard to just pick-up-shop and start a new life in a new place. Challenging, but it can be done. (besides, if it comes to it, symbolic death and re-birth is always better than suicide.) \n\nOh yes, and annother hard thing about this, ... unfortunately as far as I know, the pain never totally leaves. Depending on how you act NOW, will decide whether you are left with a scarred heart or a diseased heart. (*p.s. scar is the better choice.) If you can grasp that frightening concept, that this will always be with you at some level, then it will actually surprizingly be easier to continue your life journey. \n\nIt helps me to think in metaphors. If you have a broken arm, what do you do? you set it. If you broke it playing football, do you just try annother team? ....(*insert laughter) ... nooooo... you take time off and let it heal before thinking of getting back on the field. (i.e. don't listen to that old tale, what do you do when you fall off a horse? get back on? maybe. If you're not badly injured!) (i.e. don't try to forget about it by going girl-crazy. I don't know what possesses people to try that, it seriously would be like pouring salt-water on an open chest wound. .... maybe ...acid instead of salt-water...\n\nI feel sad to read your predicament. Don't let anyone tell you it's not real. It is more real than anything else. It hurts. For me, it's like a black hole in my chest. kinda like a pulling in feeling, like my own heart is trying to forcefully suck the life out of me.\n\nok, so in a nutshell... take some time to mourn. acknowledge all the feelings. (anger, resentment, lonliness, sadness, pain, freedom, etc..) use metaphors if it helps. (poetry is born from times like this!) and then...... Move. Litterally. change your surroundings. Look for some place that you would be comfortable calling home. Do research first. (if you have that luxury...) probably most importantly though, is to start fresh. New faces. New people. New Jobs. New atmospheres. Even just a new lunch spot will help. Be bold. You will be amazed at what courageous new things you are willing to try when the pain is so bad.\n\nGood Luck! You can do it! You are an awesome person! You have the power, now all you need to do is decide where to direct it!\n\np.s. after reading some of the other responses, I have to add, that friends don't grow on trees. And, true friends are TRUE because you put the effort forth to keep them your friends. Friends are very important. Especially good friends. And Good Friends are people who know that friends are important! (i.e. if you are serious about having a strong friend-net, you look for friends that are serious about having a strong friend-net! You can't make a good friend out of someone who doesn't feel the need for serious good friends.)\n\nSome hints on keeping friendships strong: Contact your friend regularly. (regularly= once a day, every day. or once a week, every week. ... as long as it is consistant.) Trust is built this way: I punch the desk. It hurts. The desk is there. I touch the desk. It does not disappear. I walk out of the room. I walk back. The desk is still there. I close my eyes and walk into the desk. OUCH! It&#3
158352
Read the book of I John.  Then read the gospels.\n\nJesus overcame death so that there does not need to be fear of death.\n\nIt's not about how good you are.  It's about how good He is.\n\nI'm sorry that this has you up nights.  I hope you make peace with God and with yourself soon.
648952
We're all placed in stressful situations sometimes that are difficult to cope with. My best advice to you is to look at the positive side of things. The fact that you have a job and an income is a good thing. The fact that you are using a computer to access the Internet is a great privilege (believe me it's a privilege). The fact that you were raised in this great nation is an opportunity. You sound young and you entire life is ahead of you. This is only a chapter in your life. A chapter is bound to end when another begins. Have patience and faith in yourself and in your ability to change your perception of your situation. Thank God for the moments that you have. Remember, this is life, not a dress rehearsal. Make everyday count. And finally, I have personally found that I feel a lot better when I stop focusing on my own problems and try to offer help to someone else. We get so focused on self sometimes that we forget that there are people out there who are in a much worst situation than us. Try to lend a helping hand to someone, and you will see how blessed you will become.
118461
Some would say that even one time a day is dangerous.  But, since I am currently dealing with a bout of depression myself, perhaps I can help here.  Lately, I find myself thinking more, and more about what it would be like if I was not around anymore.  I used to pretty much welcome death.  I would say I am not afraid to die because I have already lived a full life.  That was until a few weeks ago.  My best friend from college died from natural causes.  It really hit me hard.  He was the first person I had known that was my same age that died.  It made me take stock of my own life.  It made me see that I HAD NOT lived a full life yet.  True, I still am depressed, but it took the death of my best friend to show me how precious life really is.  I am not even sure if You are thinking about suicide, or you were asking for somebody else.  If you are thinking this way, let me tell beg of you, don't give in to your feelings and try to end your life.  You may not realize it now, but there really is so much to live for.  It is good that you are at least taking about the subject with other people.  It is more worrysome if you keep your emotions bottled up inside.  If you feel comfortable, try to takl things out with your friends.  If you don't want to talk to them, you can always email me. jam961@yahoo.com  I am willing to listin to you if you need to vent.  Always remember, you are not alone in depression.  It affects more people than you realize.  I wish you the best of luck, I hope you can find peace without thinking of killing yourself anymore.  When things get rough, remember you have friends here at yahoo answers.
52935
Well.. you sure noticed that things around you are always changing, developing, transforming and sometimes it even seems like some things return and happen all over and over again.\nAs you try to determine where your own path will be leading you you might want to have something like a roadmap, or a handbook on survival.\nYou might even get to a point of questioning yourself, where you would like confirmation that you are still doing the "right" thing.\nThats where religion helps. \nYou arent on your own anymore. \nYour life gets a purpose, you know you will be mastering even the greatest challenge and you dont have to be scared of anything because you cant lose, no matter how things turn out.\nPretty cool thing, if you want my opinion.\n\nThen theres something else... the fact of life itself is that you are going to die, no escape from that.\n\nNow I asked myself..if the chances are like 50/50 for a "heaven and hell" \nor "just being born all over again" and what not...\nwhat do I have to lose????\n\nSeriously, Im on the save side with religion. \nIf in the end there was no god ...then I didnt lose anything by being religious, on the contrary, life was easier at times because of having something to rely on.\n\nBut if in the end ..there is a god and I ignored him...\nnah...I wouldnt take that chance in a lifetime!