A Hispanic man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only Hispanic man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." \nThe Hispanic man turned around and stood up. He then said: \n\n"Listen, pendejo... when I was born, I was brown, when I grew up, I was brown, when I'm sick, I'm brown, when I go in the sun, I'm brown, when I'm cold, I'm brown, when I die, I'll be brown. But you pendejo... when you're born, you're pink, when you grow up, you're white, when you're sick, you're green, when you go in the sun, you turn red, when you're cold, you turn blue, and when you die, you'll turn purple. And you have the nerve to call me colored! COME MIERDA, CULERO!!! GRINGO PENDEJO MARICON!!!
214055
The idea is good and correct...but the cussing is a little over the top.
452992
Q: What three things are common between the sun and woman's underwear?\nA: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both disappear at \nnight.\n\n\n\n\nQ: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?\nA: Because they are tired of using their own.\n\n\n\nQ: What is the similarity between men and rats?\nA: Both keep searching for new holes.\n\n\n\n\n\nTwo men met while both where looking for their lost wives. \n1st: How yours look like? \n2nd: She is 5"7, 36-24-36, Fair, Black eyes. What about yours? \n1st: Forget mine. Lets find yours!! \n\n\n\n\nWomen asked man who is traveling with six children, all these kids are urs \n??? \nNo, I work in a condom factory & these are customer complaints. \n\n\n\n\n\n\nTwo Jewish men, Sid and Al, were sitting in a Mexican restaurant. Sid asked Al, "Are there any people of our faith born and raised in Mexico ?\n Al replied, "I don't know, let's ask our waiter.\n "When the waiter came by, Al asked him, "Are there any Mexican Jews?" \n The waiter said, "I don't know Senor. I'll ask the cooks.\n "He returned from the kitchen in a few minutes and said "No sir, no Mexican Jews." Al wasn't really satisfied with that and asked, "Are you absolutely sure?" The waiter, realizing he was dealing with "Gringos", gave the expected answer, "I will check again, Senor!" and went back into the kitchen. While the waiter was away, Sid said, "I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in Mexico . Our people are scattered everywhere."The waiter returned and said, "Senor, the head cook says "No\n Mexican Jews! "Are you certain?" Al asked once again, "I can't believe there are no Mexican Jews! "Senor, I ask EVERYONE," replied the exasperated waiter. "We have orange Jews, prune Jews, tomato Jews and grape Jews, but no one ever hear of Mexican Jews."\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nA little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What are Politics?"\n\nDad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way:\n\n#1. I'm the head of the family, so call me The President.\n\n#2. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the\nGovernment.\n\n#3. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the\nPeople.\n\n#4. The nanny, we'll consider her the Working Class.\n\n#5. And your baby brother, we'll call him the Future.\n\n"Now, think about that and see if it makes sense."\n\nSo, the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said.\n\nLater that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to\ncheck on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper.\n\nSo, the little boy goes to his parent's room and finds his mother\nsound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Fi nding\nthe door locked, He looks in the peephole and finds his father in bed with\nthe Nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.\n\nThe next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I \nunderstand the concept of politics now."\n\nThe father says, "Good, son, tell me in your own words what you think\npolitics is all about."\n\nThe little boy replies,\n\n"The President is screwing the Working Class, while the Government is\nsound asleep. The People are being ignored and the Future is in deep\nsh*t\n\n\n\n\n\nWhen I went to lunch today, I noticed an old lady near a park bench \nsobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong.   \n\nShe said, "I have a 22 year old husband at home. \nHe makes love to me every \nmorning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, \nsausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground coffee."   \n\nI said, "Well, then why are you crying?"   \n\nShe said, "He makes me homemade soup for lunch and my \nfavourite brownies and then makes love to me for half the afternoon".   \n\nI said,
316927
This is what I once told a retired, racial, state trooper from Alabama, who stopped talking to me after he found out my daugher was black/white. I told him to go to any library and find me a time in history when American's fled from America to go elsewhere to live; to find me a time in history when any other race went to a country, stole the people from their homes, brought them to a country where they were treated less than dogs; women and girls raped brutally while their husbands, or fathers, or brothers were forced to watch; where men and boys were auctioned off like cattle. I asked him how he would feel if I sent someone to his house to do this to him and his family. He couldn't or wouldn't answer me, he has not to this day gone to the library to do  any research. So until people can do some research about what they hate, they need to stop hating it. And, this retired, racial state trooped from Alabama started talking to me again after a few weeks. And his racial jokes all but stopped. He still can't help but tell a few, but they are not in the same tone as they were before. I feel I must also tell you I was born and raised in Louisiana, I am 42, white female taught to believe that niggers are niggers and feed the dogs better. When I joined the Army, I was brought to the realization that everything I was taught to believe about the black people I grew up with was a lie. I was so humilliated and sick of myself when i realized what i had been part of that I wanted to die, but was too scared to die because how could I stand in front of God on judgement day? Anyway, I am glad to know that what I was taught was not the truth. Anyone seeking the truth should go do some research at any library. Its free. Be you any color of skin.
371489
Oh dear, Have you come to the right place?\n\nThis is the joke section, people come here to laugh not be racist.\n\nKeep your chin up it can't be all that bad;)
657678
Hi!! no creo que alguien pueda entender esta respuesta pero creeme que estoy arto de vivir aqui y me largare lo mas pronto posible!!\nRedneck land is not a very good place to live on, the only thing they do is brainless stupidity, they get on the fields (that most of the times are private property) and tear them up. then they drink and drive, they smoke their most loved drug, then they hate on others, they still live in 1950, and don't realize the thruth that hispanics are the second largest minority and I do know that within five years, they will become the majority, and perhaps within 20 years, spainsh will have to be their official languaje, I hate to say it but Americans are in danger of extintion.\n\nmy e-mail is   heron_fordx4@yahoo.com\n\nyou can e amil me and we can talk about some issues I have at school and my plan to fixe them is going to be fun, Im the only hispanic student in that school, and hopefully my plan will work, I will make every single one student make a fool out of their self by something nice and fun!!!
295600
lol...thats pretty funny to hear, i live in los angeles, so i know exactly what your talking about. you probably hear them say, 'mira, ese chino!' they are saying 'looks, theres that chinese guy'= which they mean to refer to that asian guy. i know it feels pretty offensive, but its the same wiht the hispanics, if your hispanic, they automatically call you 'mexican' even if your 0 blood mexican.
28613
Yes I have!!!  I am Hispanic (from Costa Rica) but I used to live in Houston Texas (I am back in my country), and believe it or not, I experienced racism from Hispanic people.  \n\n\nThe people who treated me really bad were from Mexico, El Salvador and even from Costa Rica.   When I moved to Houston I spoke English but it was not good enough and sometimes I didn't understand what people said.   However if I spoke in Spanish to somebody who looked hispanic they usually said "sorry I don't speak Spanish"  And I am not only talking about the language think, they treated me bad at work too. \n\nAt least that help me to improve my English because I learned that I couldn't depend on other people. \n\nI remember one day that I went to Bank of America with a friend who was just coming to US and he wanted to open a checking account, so I saw a teller who's name was Guadalupe Flores (I'll never forget that name) and I told my friend "she speaks Spanish" go to her.  Even though my English was already good, I thought that it was better if my friend talk to the "lady" by himself.  Well, when he asked her a question she looked at him disparagingly and said: "I DON'T SPEAK SPANISH"  I got really mad that day and I told her a couple of "not nice words" and then I told her: "I am so sorry for you. You have no idea what a great advantage is to be bilingual, you get better job positions" and I left the bank.\n\nI never ever got such a despise from an American or  Afro-american person.
304590
Pretend this passage is part of a story you're reading. Read this passage, then I've got a question for you to answer.\n\n     It was a hot, sunny afternoon in the inner city. The three bald youths, wearing T-shirts and baggy pants, walked down the cracked sidewalk, their bling dangling around their shoulders. One carried a boombox playing Snoop Dogg loudly. One wore a baseball cap, its bill turned to the side. Another wore sunglasses.\n\n     All right. Now my question is: What ethnicity were these three youths? Answer, then continue reading.\n\n     My point is that you very probably thought of these youths as African-American, even though the description of them never actually said so. Why can't they be whites, or Latino? You see, stereotyping is programmed into our behavior patterns, it's hardwired into our thought processes. It's part of what makes us human. It's a survivial mechanism--we tend to organize others into groups that we want to try to stay away from, and groups that we want to try to join, because these groups could either harm us or hurt us. Such concerns are beyond "good" and "bad", it's just the way we are.
289973
porque son hipòcritas, dicen una cosa y hacen otra, lo mismo en otros temas a parte de la inmigracion.\ntambien en la guerra, en las drogas, en la democracia, dicen una cosa y hacen exactamente lo contrario
221614
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding\nthe plane. He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his.\nEager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, "Business trip or vacation?"\n\nShe turned, smiled, and said, "Business. The annual Sexual Education Convention in Chicago."\nHe swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen, sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for sex education!\n\nStruggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?" "Lecturer," she responded. "I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality." "Really," he said. "What myths are those?" "Well," she explained. "One popular myth is that African American men are the most well endowed, when in fact, it's the Native American Indian who\nis most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men\nof Jewish descent. We have, however, found that the best potential lover in all categories is the Southern Redneck."\n\nSuddenly, the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry", she said. "I shouldn't really be discussing this\nwith you. I don't even know your name." "Tonto," the man said. "Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba."
637853
oh cool! It was my mum's birthday today as well! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!  here's a joke....\nLil' Johnny goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you The People. The nanny, well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we'll call him The Future. Now go think about this and see if it makes sense."\n\nSo the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled. So the little boy goes to his parents' room. Mom is sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.\n\nThe next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand what politics is now."\n\n"Good son, tell me in your own words then what politics are."\n\nThe little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep sh it."
615766
The Last Laugh\n\nThere was a Mexican, a Canadian and an Redneck on death row.\n\nThe warden gave them a choice of three ways to die:\n\n1. To be shot. \n\n2. To be hung. \n\n3. To be injected with the AIDS virus for a slow death. \n\nSo the Mexican said, "Shoot me right in the head."  Bang! (he was dead instantly). \n\nThen the Canadian said, "Just hang me." (Snap, he was dead.) \n\nThen the Redneck said, "Give me some of that AIDS stuff." \n\nThey gave him the shot, and the Redneck fell down laughing. \n\nThe guards looked at each other and wondered what was wrong with this guy. \n\nThen the Redneck said, "Give me another one of those shots," so the guards did. \n\nNow he was laughing so hard, tears rolled from his eyes and he doubled over. \n\nFinally the warden said, "What is wrong with you?" \n\nThe Redneck replied, "You guys are so stupid..... I'm wearing a condom."
515871
Very funny. I actually got that one!!! I am a blonde and i have heard alot of jokes, but this is a new one. I thought it was prrty funny. Thanks--- i needed a laugh today!
163892
Estan pendejos todos estos racistas. They think they can over power minorities. By the way, good answer to the previous question... donde les rallaste la mama. Unity is the only way and too bad for them when hispanics turn the majority into a minority.
364044
An Irish man walks into a pub. The bartender asks him, "what'll you have?"\nThe man says, "Give me three pints of Guinness please."\nSo the bartender brings him three pints and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third until they're gone. He then orders three more.\nThe bartender says, "Sir, I know you like them cold. You don't have to order three at a time. I can keep an eye on it and when you get low I'll bring you a fresh cold one."\nThe man says, "You don't understand. I have two brothers, one in Australia and one in the States. We made a vow to each other that every Saturday night we'd still drink together. So right now, my brothers have three Guinness Stouts too, and we're drinking together.\nThe bartender thought that was a wonderful tradition.\nEvery week the man came in and ordered three beers. Then one week he came in and ordered only two. He drank them and then ordered two more.\nThe bartender said to him, "I know what your tradition is, and I'd just like to say that I'm sorry that one of your brothers died."\nThe man said, "Oh, me brothers are fine----I just quit drinking."
235242
Ok, now you're talking about my dad on yahoo. That's so freking stupid. DO you know anything about it? No, you don't. My dad does, and here's how it goes:\n\nIt's called 'Encuentra Paisanos' and it's in Spanish. I don't care if you think it's racist, because you've made some really racist comments yourself:\n\n"because we (white girls) have fendi, gucci, dior and prada bags and they don't." in the question 'why do hispanic teenage girls pick on white tenage girls in school?'\n\n"i'm not surprised...you're papi does not speak a word of english just like you and your mami and tia and your uglywela. hah, hah, hah! yuck!" in the question 'Would any of you be interested in a MySpace type thing for Latinos?'\n\nWho said that we don't want to be seen with whites and blacks!?!?!
414731
This is not an answer this is a poem I received please enjoy ( I am a very pale milky colour by the way lol)\n\nThis was written by an African American in Texas and is so funny. What a great sense of humour and creativity!!!\n\n\n\nWhen I born, I black,\n\nWhen I grow up, I black,\n\nWhen I go in sun, I black, \n\nWhen I cold, I black,\n\nWhen I scared, I black, \n\nWhen I sick, I black, \n\nAnd when I die, I still black.\n\n\nYou white folks....\n\n\nWhen you born, you pink,\n\nWhen you grow up, you white,\n\nWhen you go in sun, you red,\n\nWhen you cold, you blue,\n\nWhen you scared, you yellow,\n\nWhen you sick, you green,\n\nWhen you bruised, you purple,\n\nAnd when you die, you grey.\n\n\nSo who you callin' coloured folks???