My best friend is male (I'm female), and he recently started dating someone from a different country. She's great and I really like her, am very happy that my friend has found such a cool girl. Everyone seems to think we look so much alike and always comments on it. Recently I spent lots of time with her, as i took a trip to her country (not specifically to see her). I thought we got along great, and that she was a good friend of mine, but recently my best friend told me that his girlfriend thinks I'm in love with him. This is not true at all (and no I'm not just in denial), and he told me all these bad comments she made about me, in regards to liking him. THis hurt me, because I thought we were good friends, and she thinks I'm scamming on her boyfriend. Now I don't know if I should send her an e-mail trying to let her know that its strictly platonic or would that make things worse? I don't think she understands our relationship, or is simply jealous because I get to hang out with him.
217856
I wouldn't bring it up.  It will cause a wedge between you and your male friend because it would be breaking his confidence to email her.  Let it go and keep him as a friend.  She needs to trust him more if she wants to keep him.
201969
i have been dating one of my bestfriends ex-boyfriend, and weve been together for 3 years, we also plan on getting married. You cant help the person you fall in love with, and who are you to stop something that could be one of the best things that could happen for your best freind? if she really is your best friend then treat her as such dont let something like that bring your friendship down. let them try and see if it wroks out for them, if it does just be glad she found something a lot of people dont get the chance to, and if it doesnt work dont give an i told you so, compfort her as you would if you didnt know the guy. Keep smiling and find you someone who you can have fun with a be real with.
56522
Honestly, do you really believe that she is your friend? If I were you, I would tell her how inconsiderate she is for actually dating someone she *KNEW* I had the hots for. I could see if she *didn't* kno, but she *DID*! That's so foul and disrespectful, and truly, I would re-evaluate this friendship with her. She doesn't sound like much of a friend if you ask me! If you allow your "friends" to continue to disregard your feelings, you're going to have a hard life ahead. Friends *DON'T* do things such as that. Guard your heart, hon. God bless you!\n\nHope that helped!
453950
Your friend is being really stubborn. It seems to me that she has some deep-seated issues with criticism. (I should introduce her to my best friend — they sound like kindred spirits.) You need to get them both in the same place (don't tell them your plans until you get them together) so they can work out whatever beef she has with him. It's good that your boyfriend at least tried to make amends.
300453
yes. it's actually not a question on the guy's side but on the girls since girls are a lot sensitive compare to boys. rivalry between the close friend and the girlfriend will never be avoided. so why not try to be close friends with your girlfriend or fall for your best friend? :)
41034
If she is your best friend then she should understand. You know you can't make someone like you and you know you mustn't live your life according to someone else's ideas or wants. It is normal that she might hate you or feel jealous. Guess what it ain't your fault. SO TELL HIM!!!
248408
Ask her what it is she really hates about him- it might be something you really need to know.  After all, if she is your best friend, she knows you really well.  Have a good think about what she says, because she might really be aware he is wrong for you and would rather go than upset you, so ask while you have the chance, and good luck (you can still text and call, and e-mail???)
466464
Wrong?  That's for you to decide, but here's some food for thought.\n\nShe needs your friendship.  If you give her friendship without going for anything more right now, it shows her respect.  Then, when she is less vulnerable, if the two of you get together she will respect you more and you will be able to trust that she's with you for the right reasons and not simply out of need.\n\nIf the two of you got involved right now, it might be for the wrong reasons at the wrong time and thus set you up for failure down the road.\n\nIf you are "right" together, then it won't hurt for you to be her best friend and hold off on the other stuff for a while out of respect for her temporary vulnerability and genuine love or care for her.\n\nJust something to consider.  Good luck!
170453
I understand what your going thru. My best friend is doing the same thing to me. I called her in November to ask her if she wanted to go out for her b-day and she hasn't called me since. I did find out that she is getting married(through a mutual friend) I have no idea what's going on w/her either. Like an earlier answer said, I'm sure she is probably dealing with something in her life right now that she doesn't feel so great about. Maybe she feels too bad to talk to you about it? Maybe she thinks you'll judge her. I would just do what I did. I called my best friend a couple of weeks back and left her a message on her cell. I told her that I didn't know what was going on but I still loved her and cared about her very much. We've been friends for 13 years and I have never judged her for anything she has done in the past and she can come to me with anything. After you've done that, all you can do as back off and give her some space. If she's truly the friend that you think she is(and like I think my best friend is) she'll come around. Just let her know that you are worried about her and want to make sure she's ok. If she continues to be this way, maybe you're better off without her. That's what I've decided.
378663
You should believe ur best friend if you've known him for a long time and if you trust him more. Analyze on who told more lies. I think she's just a jealous girl who wants to ruin what you have but don't let her do that. Soo I hope I helped.
78533
Sounds to me like a mixture of jealousy and being scared of losing her friend. The fact is that despite being your best friend, you have your own life to lead. Maybe you should sit her down and try and gently find out why she gets so bothered and reassure her that your friendship will always be there. Does she have boyfriends or has she been hurt in the past? Your success in love may be highlighting her own insecurities. Talking to her is definitely the best option. Good Luck.
98527
i completely understand what ur going through, i was in the same boat a you. my advice is, if he really is happy with his girlfriend right now, i wouldn't say anything. because right now you're his friend, and you should be happy for him, unless she really isn't good for him (meaning she doesn't treat him right). but, if and when you do tell him, make sure you do it in person. just tell him that he is a great friend, and that u love being friends with him b/c he is such a great guy. then tell him that somewhere in the friendship your feelings changed, and now you like him. that's all i can really tell you. i hope i was some help.
83397
I was in love with my best friend and I told him. He didn't feel the same way as I did but that didn't hurt our relationship either, it actually brung us closer and our bond grew because of it. It's a huge risk to tell her but if you really feel strong enough, I say go for it. Who knows, your best friend could always become the best girlfriend you ever had and if nothing else at least she will understand how much you care about her.
603931
Like it or not, your friend was the one who ditched you--her boyfriend didn't "take her away" from you.\n\nMy best friend (and roommate) did this to me over a year ago.  I confronted her about it, and she stopped...but there was tension between her boyfriend and me for the remainder of her relationship with him.\n\nI still have trust issues with her and am waiting for the day she finds someone new and drops me all over again.
274825
If your friend doesn't know that you and your boyfriend are an item, then she is doing nothing wrong.  You need to tell her because if she thinks she has a chance with him and she doesn't she runs the risk of getting hurt.
356223
If she likes the guy she is dating then she shouldn't feel guilty for liking him, unless she has lead the other guy that likes her on. \nIt's not her fault she doesn't like him, she can tell him nicely that she doesn't. It's the guy's choice on whether to be a man and not hold a grudge or to go off and sulk.\n\nBut it is hard if you like someone and that someone likes your best friend instead.\nEither way, we should all care about meeting the right one for us, so apparently if she doesn't like him, she's not the right one for him!
549428
When I was in High School my best friend was so pretty.  She had beautiful long hair and a cute figure.  Every guy looked at her butt because it was a perfect shape.  Not too big or little.  I think I was actually jealous of her butt. LOL!!!!!  I am so embarrassed I just said that.  :)   Anyway,  I just was kinda happy go lucky and didn't worry about it.\nYears later when we would go out dancing or clubbing guys paid more attention to me.  I was in College and she would call me  and beg me too come home for the weekend so we could go out.  When I got in town I would always have to call her and then she would say that her and her frind Mary were going out, but i could come too.  After this happening about 3 times (I lived 5 hours away from school so coming home was a major ordeal) I was confused and mad.   She would talk to her other girlfriend and ignore me.   While we were in the ladies room I told her that she was acting wierd and was ignoring me .  I asked her " are you jealous of me"?   She was like "why would I be jealouse of Kimberly *****?  (*=my last name)  I said I don't know why, but you are.  She denied it.  I left and went home.  We didn't speak again until a few years later I ran into her at  a club.  She was drunk and came up to me and asked if I could come into the bathroom with her.  I agreed.   While there she started to cry and said "remember that night when you asked if  I was Jealous of you?"   She said " Well I was and I lied and I am so sorry".\n\nMy point is this.  When I was jealous of her I didn't worry about it because  I was proud of who I was and loved her as my best friend.  Then when my body matured and I turned into a young woman I still thought she looked great, but I was no longer jealous.   But she couldn't handle me getting all the attention because she was insecure during that time.\nGod tells us to not be jelous or envious.  If you work on loving yourself for who you are and forget about who is giving whom the attention things will come and go your way because confidence is beautiful.\nMy best friend and I lost 2 years together that we can never get back.\nAnd just because no one says to you that your pretty does not mean that they are not saying it to others.  They are telling you that she is so pretty, but they are not saying it to her.