Me and my boyfriend have been going out with eachother for 3 years. We'd do anything for eachother. Our love is true! Its not young love. I feel actually older than my age; and Im intelligent, know what choices to make, and me and my baby can get through anything. And that is what Marriage is about.\nWe don't believe in divorce, were both christians. We live for God. Lately; my baby has been talking about wanting to marry me, and have children with me,and spend the rest of his life with me. He knows my dream is to get proposed to in Paris. I found Paris tickets for this summer... So im thinking hes going to ask. I AM IN LOVE WITH HIM! and we're both virgins; waiting on marriage. We're both going to college to be doctors. What do you guys think? You think we should at my age? Teen years yes i know... they are immature, and they think their in love; but their not. I feel like im older, and so does he. We make mature decisions, and we do what Jesus would do. \n\nTHanks!!GODBLESS!
204815
You did not say how old you both are, so I can only assume you are both old enough to get married. If true love is what you have then God bless the both of you.
260244
Sweeite, it's alright.  What you feel is totally natural.  I have been with my guy for three years and I am the maid of honor for a woman who has been dating her guy for five months.  I have a complex about it, and she loves to rub it in.  \n\nSomething I have realized, though, through all this is that marriage, while being the ultimate committment is not required to have a totally fulfilling realtionship.  While I may not even be engaged, I know that we are meant to be and have a bond that my friend cannot even contemplate with her new beau.  \n\nNot being egnaged only means that you are mature enough to know that the marriages that last longer are the ones who wait two to five years.  You will not stumble into anything weird wwhen you get married.  You know everything about him.  Believe me, some of these new brides will find at least one thing that will surpirse them about their mate.  Getting married in the honeymoon phase of a realtiohsip, while looks good on paper, is not really the best way.  once that is over, what do you have left?  Only knowledge and understanding of the other will be the true test of time, and that can only come with time.  \n\nDon't sweat it.  You are the smarter one.  Know it, breathe it, live it!  You are one up on them, not the other way around!
277482
I think it is time to Chirp or get off the branch.  My wife and I had been dating for a while, I really loved her but did not ask her to get married.  She finally gave me a date by which to chirp or to get off the branch.  I chirped and it has been the best thing I ever did.  We have been married for many years and are more in love today then ever.  I would openly discuss your concerns with him and then let him know that you need commitment by say June 30.  If he doesn't make the commitment, move on to someone that truly loves you and someone that will make that commitment.  Too often, we stick with someone that we know is not right for us and then the years go by.  After it is too late, we realize that life is passing us by and we are in a relationship that is going nowhere.  I think people need to list the things that they want in a relationship/mate and then if after a few months they do stack up, they need to move on.  People really don't change much with time--if it doesnt feel right at first it probably wont get any better with time.   Good Luck!
627267
I cannot tell you how bad I feel that someone hurt you sooo much when you were little.  I wish I could change it for you.\n\nHowever, Why are you trying to get pregnant and your not married??  I'm not judging you.  It's just that, if he has not committed to marry you and stay with you, are you in a position to take care of a child by yourself??  I only ask because I am a Mother of 3 girls.  Two of whom got pregnant with their boyfriend.  \n\nI also got pg before I got married.  We married, but it was a disaster and I ended up with 3 kids to take care of alone.  I really struggled because I only had a high school education. \n\nThink really hard about doing this. sweety.  This isn't something that goes away if you change your mind.  And no matter how good your man is now, things could change.  Can't you guys just be happy with the 2 of you right now??\n\nI know, sometimes things work out.  Are you 100% sure this is going to work out with the 2 of U?  Good luck, and God Bless.  By the way, God is waiting to hear from you.
232678
My husband and I met in late October 2004.  Within two weeks, I knew we were going to marry.  We moved in together almost immediately.  Although, I did keep my apartment until we were married, but never went there.  We took several road trips together.  We were engaged on May 13, 2005, and married on July 27, 2005. We are expecting our first child in October of this year.  I cannot imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone  else.  We are both 28 years old.  I have never been married, though have been engaged a couple of times.  I have never been more cetain of anyone or anything in my whole life.  Yes, we get on each other's nerves every now and again, but Phillip is my family, my best friend, my lover and husband.  I can tell him everything and talk to him about anything.  I have no doubts, regardless of what may come, we can work it out.  For me, divorce is never an option.  I will stand by Phillip whatever comes because I care about him and I am certain he will never purposely hurt me.  I would rather experience the grandest love and then lose it than never have known it at all.  I say go for it.  If you feel it deep inside yourself, take your love as far as you can.
111642
My opinion about your situation is...\n\nIN God's eyes you are already married by virtue of having fornicated.  Thus, if you  make it legal by civil marriage, then in the eyes of God, technically you are fine.\n\nYou have already asked forgiveness, and God does forgive.\n\nIf you saved yourself for your boyfriend, and you have been with no other person, and in love you have fornicated, as you say, then you ARE married, by God's definition.\n\nNow, in the eyes of the "law" you are not married, but that can be solved once you give yourselves to eachother legally on paper.\n\nOf course, I don't know your age, and this advice is given with the understanding that you are of age.  Else, I would advise against such activity, until you are an adult.\n\nOf course, you already feel guilty and are giving in to his desires.  Yours may not be as strong, or might be once the guilt is removed by virtue of marriage.  ON the other hand , he should respect your wishes to be chaste, until you are married.  That will truly determine his love for you. This is a hard thing, because you love him, and the unknown is whether he would wait and also be faithful in the process.  \n\nI hope it works out for you..
616211
Ooh...what a mess! Ok, first, should have waited a little longer to cohabitate. Now that makes it hard on you, your boyfriend and your son. All things in due time, my dear. Next, I do have some good news here...you'll probably always love your son's father in some small way because he shared with you an experience no one else has, which is creating your child together. This will change with more time, though I can't say if your feelings for your boyfriend will change. I loved my ex dearly but he wasn't in love with me. He accidentally got me pregnant and we both decided it was for the best for me to have an abortion. We're still great friends ever since we broke up, but that will always tie us together, even though no one else knows what truly bonded us. It took me time but I didn't move on until I was really ready and it sounds like you did. You're also really young and you already have a child so a lot of this could stem from those early 20's feelings of newfound independence and sowing wild oats. Only you can decide. Take some time for yourself and figure out what it is you really want. Once you clear your head, you might realize you do love this man, or you might soundly be able to declare to yourself that you don't. Remember that love takes time to build and establish, and you haven't been with this new guy for too terribly long. Whatever you decide, best of luck to you.
664001
Okay, how about you stop worrying about what he wants?  What about what you want?  How old are you?  Have you even had a chance to experience life?  It really sounds like he doesn't know if he wants to be with you or not but is going to continue stringing you along until he can make up his mind.  What are you going to do if he comes home, gets you pregnant and then decides he's not ready to be a husband and father?  Where does that leave you?  Can you be absolutely sure that he will not do that?  If the answer is no, then maybe you need to tell him that you need things to slow down. You don't have to let him call all the shots.  You are a person as well.  You have a right to decide, for yourself, what you want out of this life. There is much more to experience in life than being someones girlfriend/wife/mother.  Don't get me wrong, I am married and have a beautiful little boy, but I experienced life for myself before I did so. And we were married 7 years before I got pregnant so we could experience life together.  I wish you luck and hope you make the right decision for you!
324051
First, GOOD FOR YOU that you have decided to become a Christian! THat's wonderful! I know it is difficult, but yes, your religion will have an effect on your relationship. The opposite also holds true-- your relationship will have an effect on your religion. It sounds as if you really love your boyfriend. If I were in your situation, I would pray and sit him down. Explain to him how you feel and how important this is to you to raise your children this way. Your faith may prove to be a turning point for him. Your faith will mean that there will be things you should no longer do (such as premarital sex, etc). IS he willing to stand by you? You have to communicate with him. If he really loves you, it will be difficult, but he will respect your faith, even if he does not "buy into it" at this time. You also have to be prepared that he may not understand and may try to talk you out of it. Be strong and stay prayerful. Pray for him as well, that he may also find the Lord. Even if you break up, continue to lift him up in prayer. Pray for the strength to be true to your faith. I wish you the best of luck. I know it is a difficult path you are about to embark on. Be strong. God will not forsake you and you may lead your boyfriend to the Kingdom as well!!!
462714
Yea I think you should, I don't know how old you are, but it seems that he might not be ready for a commitment. and if you ask a question if you should just move on, you most likely should. good luck
43232
It (probably) means that it wasn't meant to be. You two have lived it up and have produced two lovely children. I'm sure the both of you love them more than life itself. But perhaps that's where it ends...It seems like you have tried everything. Hell, you even went to counseling. Good job on both of your parts. You two want it to work. Maybe you're going through a phase? Maybe you should spice things up a bit. Join a club together, join together in a new sport, go hiking, camping, maybe you could spend less time with each other. Mabe ALL you need is a BREAK. C'mon now...16 years together. THAT tells you something. It cannot just stop like that. Do not give up. There is a reason why the two of you are together. There is a reason why you met, why you got married, why you decided to create children. Reminisce together about the days when you were younger, the crazy things you guys did for each other, the first time you told each other 'I Love you', etc. Do not give up. If it's an attraction/physical thing, work it out (Literally). Get sexy, make him look at you like you're the hottest thing to have walked this earth. It's not over sweetie. I believe in you guys.
350766
Yes, you deffinately should save it for marriage! I don't know how religious you are, but I want you to know that I'm not a religious nut. But, God does say that we should save ourselves for marriage. B/c [and this isn't just for religious people] our bodies are meant for ONLY our husband or wife. If you have sex before marriage, then when you get married, you're body isn't completely hers. And, visa versa. I don't know if that made sense to you. Now, I'm a 16 year old girl, and a lot of times I want to do something w/ the opposite sex, but I don't b/c when I get married, I want to be completely his. I don't want to have used myself already... I would feel that I was letting him down. Let me know if that helped okay? Good luck. lol.
617966
Of course you can ask them that is not your problem.  Personally, I think that 20 is too young to get married. I'm not saying it hasn't worked for other people but you seem to be going in an exciting direction.  Are you ready to get married I mean really prepared because if you are planning on taking it seriously it is a big responsibility.  Just being legally old enough doesn't make doing something right. Like teenagers having babies before they are independently responsible.  If he is not ready then he is not. Your life is not going to end it will just hurt. I have to tell you though,life will go on you never know maybe you fall away and get back together.  If you are meant to be it will happen you have to trust that.  Anybody is going to find being away for 3 yeas hard that is common sense.  You don't have 2 situations like get an education or stay and marry your boyfriend.  Just go on with the long distance relationship.  I assume your bf has finished school.  If he feels the same way as you maybe he will move near your school to be near. Maybe he won't . Either way you will survive. You can't predict the future you can only do what is right for your life now and let the chips fall where they may.
485359
well 1st, i am in the same situation now.\ni am 16 but he just turned 19.\nhe tried to propose to me also....at 16 yrs old, yea we do love you. but as women we cant be sure if we will still love you forever and ever, we haven't had time to find ourselves yet. or even really experience life. so when she says no its not a blow on you. we do it to protect you frm gettin hurt in the long run.
355509
It sounds like your relationship is great but one thing that worried me - you said you were worried his family wouldn't like you - you should meet them first, and make sure he meets yours first.  \n\nWhen I first started reading your post I had my doubts, BUT \nI don't think the age difference matters in your case.  In some it does, but your relationship does seem more mature.  People always think I am too young also.  I'm 19 and getting married next summer too.  I love this man and he is my best friend and my life partner.  We've been together since I was in middle school and we've grown up together and are still growing together.  I think it's amazing to find a love like this when you are so young.  Don't worry about what everyone else thinks - count your blessings that you have something that some people NEVER find.  \n\nJust be sure you have the same goals, and plans for the future.  For example, in a few years you are going to want a son or daughter with him also.  I am sure you love his son like your own but the time will come when it will drive you crazy that he is not your own and you need to make sure he will be willing to have more children.
194895
I don’t personally believe, based on my own Christian faith, that God has dictated everything in your life.  Bottom line is, you are a co-writer of the story God is telling through you.\n\nYou will have opportunities to become romantically involved with different people in your life, and you simply do not “know” ahead of time what you are “supposed” to do. You might feel safer if God simply dictated every little step to you, but He won’t do that. You are not a robot, you are gloriously alive and part of the story yourself. That is scary, but it should also be exhilarating. (You have a say!)\n\nYou might end up picking someone who is similar to you, and marriage will be easy to make work -- but you won't be very challenged. Or you might end up picking someone with whom marriage is very difficult at first, but God still can make the marriage work and deepen as beautifully as the first option.\n\nMeanwhile, God wants you to be faithful to him in whatever you do. Act as He would have you in this relationship and see where it goes. If the relationship deepens (you grow to care about each other, your faith is leading you both in the same direction, and so on), let it deepen and see what happens. \n\nPray about it, pray for your romantic partner, focus on long-term growth and ask God for direction. Ask older wiser folks you trust for their opinions.\n\nMeanwhile, enjoy the friendship that is flowering. The abundant life (and by that I meant the spiritually fulfilling one, not the hedonistic pleasure-at-all-cost one) is meant to be lived and experienced.\n\nDon’t focus on whether or not you are “making a mistake” by perhaps not picking the earmarked person from the pool of 6 billion, that’s a fearful way to live. Focus on what God is doing in you and this person right now while you’re together, learn from it, and go where it takes you.
49183
Been there, done that. I was 17 when I got married, I am now 34 and yes, we are still married. I had my son when I was 19, my daughter when I was 20 and my other daughter when I was 22. My hubby had a career when we got together but since he was still young(he was 20) he still had more he wanted to do with his life. More dreams he wanted to accomplish. I loved him and wanted him to be succesful and do his thing so that his dreams could come true and I figured it was all ok because I would take care of the kids and the house. I figured I could go back to school later. We struggled, financially and  emotionally. We loved each other(and still do) and thought that was all we needed to get us through.I got a job to help with the bills and tried to take a class at the local community college. It was hard working full time all day, going to class twice aweek at night doing homework, keeping up with the house work and trying to find time to spend with hubby and the kids. The kids spent alot of time with a sitter(she was good but a sitter is not mom) It was exhausting. I finished my class and decided to wait until he was finished with all his schooling and until I had more time and money.\nIt's funny how when you don't live your dreams at the right time, and think that you can do it later, later never comes.\nLife got in the way so I never went back to school. My kids are teenagers now and we aren't rich, sometimes we still struggle financially. I still want to go back to school but I know that in 3 years my son will be graduating from high school so I am saving MY education money so he can go to college and so his sister can the year after that.Then 2 years after her, my youngest will need the funds to go to college. They will all go to college because I don't want them to be where I am right now. Not regretting that I got married, especially  to the guy I am with, but , wishing I had waited until I had done the things that needed to be done to make me feel accomplished.  I could have had more to offer  my children, ( more time with them, the ease of knowing that the electric will always be on instead of them having to worry about things like that). I'm not gonna tell you not to get married, that's a decision you will have to make on yur own. I will tell you though, to think it over, in a mature fashion, without your feelings for your guy getting in the way. Think about the things you need to do for you, what you want out of life. Think about your future children and how you want to live. Then make your decision. \nDon't be 34 and wishing you had done things differently. \nThere's only one road in life and it is a one way road going forward. You can't go back to change things, so, make your choices count.