my bf alwaz ask me tis question? r u having preiod? when is ur period? do u wan sex? r u in d mood of sex?... sumtimes i havent manage to ans..he will just go ahead n do it? doesnt tis call not respecting own gf decision .somtimes i will be very mad..yes is good to hav sex but is it not a nice way bcos there is no respect...? sumtimes i dun feel happy after sex...instead i will go home n masturbate... with a better pleasure...bcos of his charater he actually make me like tis...is not tat i dun like sex...is just d respect i needed...
208848
Well, you should talk with him openly about how you would want your relationship to function on the sexual department.\nYour main problem is probably lack of communication.
669295
if u enjoy the sex but not so much getting hurt then try to let him go! hard as it will be this kinda thing makes u stronger! hes got a gf then that's just 2 bad 4 now! don't hang about 4 him or be easy access for him! don't regret what u have done u were only looking out 4 number 1 and that's who's important carry on your life and if he comes looking in the future tell him u ain't gonna do nothing till he leaves his Mrs/s will show u what he really wants u or just an easy lay! not being nasty in any way just know users when i c them!
26636
NO!! sex is something that you should wait until you get marry. and if you have to ask that just means you not ready. dont give it up just b/c this guy wants it. if he turely loves you tell him to wait and to keep his hands above the shoulders
449564
i would ask him what he really wants because i can already tell your not just in it for the sex. if he doesn't want to be with you i'd stop the sex because your just gonna keep getting more attatched good luck :)
178201
Sex is very important in mine and my husbands relationship . I will be honest and say for two weeks we have not had sex or talked much about anything and we always had talked before . After my husband went to  work today I emailed him and asked him what was going on . He says he's been tired and under a lot of stress at work and has a lot of stress because his brother lost his kids . I have been so sad the past week just because I didn't feel loved or wanted . After he talked to me about what was going on I felt a lot better but sex helps people feel more loved and wanted . To me sex and talking is a big part of a relationship .\n\nAngel
598317
If he is truly respecting you then God bless him !\nIf he is not ready to tell you if something is wrong then he is afraid of losing you .or not sure that he just loves you and not someone else also .\nOr maybe he feels 3 months is not long enough to know some one be for having sex , again God bless him . Just because you have had sex be for doesn't  mean you have sex with the next one sooner .or at all, till marriage .\nHope this helps you , be patient ,it will all be clear in time .\nLove not Lust
341734
He's using you and no ur not using him, if you were your emotions wouldnt be invested in it and entertaining the thought of being his gf again. He has a gf and you on the side and what do you have? Some empty sex w/ a loser that your pining away after? Oh yeah, you really have the upper hand in this one. Stop being used and gain a lil respect for yourself and go find some guy that isnt a cheating a*shole.
149360
hahahaha!! okay ppl the gurlz serious maybe he is tryna say his ummmm is big,u know?What he doesn't know is that that will male you more curious  like hmmmmmmmmm!That is also good becauz atlease he has respect for you,to wait ,and not just smash(have sex,in n.o that's what we say when it's just u know non caring/loving sex) you.So,that's  good that he cares enuf to wait.
376237
if he was just after sex he would be asking in person === he prob sees the emails and phones as safe --- ie no chance of real sex \n\nin person he allows you the control --- so your feelings and his respect for them means he will wait until you are ready --- no matter how long it takes
387967
There is no easy way to discuss it with him.  But you will have to sit down and talk to him.  There is a difference between sex and love.  Unfortunately some men either don't know the difference or some know but don't care.  You are right, it should be a two way street.  However, some days it is not. There are days when you don't want to or he doesn't want to but either of you go ahead anyway because you care for that person. Those days, you shouldn’t feel like you are lowering yourself either.  Some days you want to have sex. I personally feel that most days it should be about love.  What I am sensing from you is that it is more sex than love.  If he respects you then he will understand and be willing to wait until you are ready.  \n     This is the part that is going the trickiest because you want to talk to him before he tries to get you into bed.  You don't want to give him the impression that you don't want to be with him anymore yet you still want him!  It is hard to get some guys to understand, but if he cares about your feelings he will.  \nIf he is still unwilling to cooperate or is not willing to understand, then he made need to be cut off in the bed room for a while.  I have had friends who had to take time apart before they understood.  I can't say that will be for everybody, but at least a separation from the bedroom.  If he keeps forcing his way into your bed and you tell him NO, then that is rape and that can be more serious.  Hopefully, it won't get that far.
423907
although sex is pleasurable....continue to do what you wanna do! if you guys are comfortable without sex then so be it! just continue being happy in your marriage! don't let other people tell you about YOUR marriage! YOU and HIM are married not everyone else, so their comments on YOUR MARRIAGE shouldn't matter.
640715
Because he's horny. You need to sit and explain that sex is not the goal for you and that he needs to respect the fact that you do not want to go all the way with him. Set up those boundaries at a time when you are not in the heat of the moment so that you do not feel any pressure to go further than you'd like at any time.\n\nAnd, if he doesn't respect that, get him out of the picture. You deserve someone who will respect your body and your choices.
537669
Sex does not equal a relationship as far as guys are concerned.  Sex is a step pretty far down the road in any relationship no matter how cute the guy is!  If it's no sex, no relationship as far as this guy is concerned, then he doesn't really care for you and your feelings.  If the guy cares, he will wait and since you are so confused about it, so should you. This is an act you should be ABSOLUTELY sure about.  (Don't forget STD and pregnancy protection!!!!!!!)
123308
Well, let me tell U that I was in your shoes for many time, I had sex and it always felt good, I had orgasms but not during sex, I was so desperate, and frustrated, but one time I had sex with my bf and nothing happened that time, still he didn't give up, and continue doing things to make me get the orgasm.  After three months of having sex with him, and we had tryed almost everything, he told me that I needed to focus on the point, I mean, when I was doing it, I always was thinking in something else, and that didn't make me feel good.\nI found that the way to get the orgasm was being on top, so I did it, in the beginning it was really difficult, but at the end it happened.\nSo, my advice is: focus on the point that U're gonna get it, think that U can get it, no matter your past experiences, if U trust on yourself U'll be able to experience it.\nI'm telling U this, because now I can enjoy it, I have an orgasm during sex and in other situations, like o.r.a.l. sex, been m*stur*b*ated by my bf or myself. and it feels really great.
436799
Relax, it is just who he is.  Growing up we all experience life differently and develop different ideas regarding how to treat people.  Your current boyfriend sounds like he has grown up with the idea that men shouldn't be aggressive and force sex on women.  I can relate to him in that to a large degree I feel the same way.  We see and hear so much about men forcing women into having sex that some of us tend to go over board the opposite direction.  He feels like he is doing the right thing by waiting for you to initiate things rather than forcing it on you.  The best thing you can do is to talk to him and let him know it is ok for him to initiate things some times.  Realize though this will be hard for him to do so be patient and be glad you have a guy that respects you and doesn't feel like your required to have sex with him when ever he wants it.
594928
Sweetie, if you feel like you are being used... then it means you aren't happy. Therefore, talk to him about it. Say, why don't you pay this time.. or when he wants to do something say ok, well you pay because I had XXX bills this month so money is tight. Talk to him about making you leave after sex. If you don't bring it up, it will eat away at you.\n\nHere is a hint- if he gets angry/ defensive after you tell him any of this, then yes he is most likely a user and your instincts were probably right. If he says, sorry hun didn't mean to make you feel that way, or something to that extent, then he seems like a good guy.\n\nAnd girl, cmon now, real estate agent, successful woman, you've got it goin on- if it does turn out that he's using you move on! You're a catch and can do better!
285650
I think this is very risky business, it can make someone feel so jealous and insecure. If he just keeps asking to have anthoer person in the bedroom it would make me feel that he's not happy with me sexually. I think if this is something that your going to choose both of you better agree its a one time thing, and also it better be with someone that you will never see agian.