About a year ago I was dating someone that we eventually didn't work out.  About a month ago he contacted me again and wanted to see and like a fool I went to see.  By the end on the night, I found out that not olny was he with someone else while he was with me, he also concieved a child during this period and he now lives with his son and the child's mother.  My quesion to all is, he called me today and he wants to see me, what should I do?\n\nThe loving is real good but I am at a lost for how to handle this situation again. I like being with him but I don't ant all of the extra drama and I know how it is to be a baby mother and have your other half cheat, it didn't feel good to me so I know that if the other woman knew she would be very upset, HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!!
215802
Do Not even go there again!
140327
Out of respect for his baby and his wife... leave him alone. You will always be number 3. He is using you and betraying you. How could you allow someone to treat you like that?
608562
i was in this very situation for the last two month, The man left me for another woman and while he was gone he was calling me the whole time and asking me if he could come home. He just went with the other girl for the sex. We had been in a relationship for nine years and have two children together. He eventually left the other girl and is now back with me and we are married now for the last week. Don't get involved with a man who is on the rebound it wont work. I told the other girl he was still seeing me but she didn't believe me.
28211
I believe people can change. Once a cheat always a cheat is very judgmental. Anyway, to spend your life with someone, you need to trust him. If you don't think he can be trusted, don't let him back just because he begged. Only you yourself can decide, please also take your baby into consideration. Wish you the best.
609256
You both need to decide what you want.  He should NOT under any circumstance marry this other girl if he is telling you he loves you more than her.  I understand she is pregnant, but in the end I'd rather be pregnant and alone than a divorcee who's ex husband cheated on me because he still wanted to boink his ex.  When you still love someone who has found someone else it is hard, but you will eventually get over it.  Keep your hands off the guy though, she may be pregnant, but I'm sure all 5 of her closes friends aren't, and messing with her man might entail an ass beating.
270283
Take it as reassurance.. why would you even care that he's out there to do the same thing to other women that he was doing to you....\n\n...forget about him
84111
He's probably cheating or looking for other women to cheat with.  Once a cheater it's always in their nature to do it again.  You're probably better off leaving this guy and moving on to someone else that makes you happier.
640806
Well, he keeps coming around because ur allowing him to, he sounds like he wants to have his cake& eat it too, I mean he's living someone who he has a child with and comes to u, tells u that he still loves and wants u.\n\nAnd I have a feeling u still want him ( even thought he has a family) with another woman.\n\nU ask if he could be in something that he can not get out of( WHAT?) he can't get out of being a father,\n\n\nOk think about this if u would\n\nUr the girl  he's living with u have a child with him, and whule ur home with the child and loving him thinking that things are good but he keeps going over to his ex telling her he stil loves her and wants to be with her and that he may have gotten into something he can't get out of.\n\n then he comes to u and tell u this( wouldn't u feel betrayed) that while u didn't know that the whole time u and ur baby was who he didn't want to be with and he rather be with his ex?\n\nIt would hurt wouldn't it? \n\nSee sometimes u have do think deep about things like tis, u have to sometimes put urself in the other persons shoes.\n\nDo u really want to be with a guy who's ready to leave his family? May be he will do the same toy u because he see something he looks at as better then he will leave u \n\nSo think about it  b 4 u make room for him to come back.
629524
I think that he told you about him cheating on you, so if you forgive him, he thinks it would be ok to do it again. I think you need to get rid of him and move on. You are way better than to have a guy cheating on you. You need to get a good boyfriend. He probably just called you because he broke up with the other girl. You need to just leave now while you can. You don't want to get back into this relationship, just so he can cheat on you again. Ever heard once an cheater, always a cheater, well that is mostly always true, honey.  If you have the feeling that something will go terrible wrong, you are probably right. Your first instinct is usually the right one. If he likes to date your friends, and has done this before, he will keep doing that. Just walk away from it all.\nGood Luck to you, girl. I know you will find a better guy that does not cheat. That is what you deserve,
265175
I can understand how you feel ....You will always love him but  he did you wrong....because if he really loved you then he would have never cheated on you in the first place...He says that he loves you because he probably realized what he lost.....never the less he cheated on you...and i am pretty sure you trusted him with your whole heart and he broke it by being with another woman.....that is his fault not yours...You  just need to be honest with him and tell him its over, and that if he ever really did love you , that he needs to leave you alone cuz you need time to heal....So in the meantime just be strong and do something that makes you happy and not think about him.....even though i know its hard to do....
266207
That's the way love goes. But he is a man and a man is going to do man things. Although it was disrespectful as fuck. And u should have beat his ass. Not the girl. She probably didn't even know he had a baby mama or girl. Id say he learned his lesson. But wait for him to come back. Maybe he doesn't want to be with you anymore. And if u ask for him back maybe u'll get your feelings hurt. I wouldn't try. I would start lookin for a new man. u'll get over him. occupy your time to keep your mind off of him.
515390
I understand your love for your fiance as you gave him a second chance in hopes of savaging your relationship with him.  There are a few things to consider here:\n\nThe 1st is that he has not been entirely up front with you about his side relationship which most likely means that he doesn't really want you to find out because either he feels guilty about it or he feels that you would be upset by it or both.  \n\nSecondly, for most men, if they have cheated on your once, they will most likely do it again because it gives them pleasure to be with different women.  Clearly, if I may be blunt, he isn't entirely satisfied with you and you can be the most perfect woman in the world, but to him, the excitement is no longer there and he'll need to find other women to please himself.  \n\nThirdly, either you're easily fooled or he's really good about hiding his "other" relationship from you enough for you to not probe him for the longest time. If this is going to be your relationship with him down the road, you're going to be always on your feet worrying about when is the next time your fiance is going to have another woman that you don't know about.  Its a very tiring game...\n\nI know you love your fiance and he should be grateful to have such a forgiving woman by his side, but how many times are you prepared to forgive him?  How about let's turn the table around and say if you cheated on him?  Would he be as forgiving as you?   \n\nGive your relationship with him a few thoughts.  Maybe it might just work out, but its not going to be easy.
222030
Sorry about the loss of your child.  But I think you two have ran your course and you need to move on.  This guy was not there for you and more importantly your child.  Don't take him back again.  You'll only be setting yourself up for more hurt.
547816
I had a broken heart. Just recently when I found out that my boyfriend was cheating on me, when I told him about it we started fussing, and when he was fussing he said some bad things about me, that I probably would never know if we did not fuss. But he has really moved on. And it really tears me up because I still think about him and I also don't want him to have a baby by her. That would tear me up even more. But I understand100% were you are coming from. If you would like to talk more about this just email me at star200252@yahoo.com I would be happy to talk to you more.
97740
Hey girl...this sucks.  Been there done that.  Questions, questions, questions...  You should always know that when you date a guy that has baggage like that to be prepared to sacrafice.  I am impressed with the fact that he was still into a relationship with his x and kids because that shows his willingness to still let the kids have some normalcy.  I can understand how hard this was for you, and maybe it just wasn't meant to be.  Now, if he was just keeping in touch so he could be close to his x, then you are much better off pulling out of that fight, than staying and losing, which would've happened eventually.  Maybe you should give him a call if he is as great as you say he is, and thoroughly explain to him what's been bothering you.  Tell him exactly how you feel about him, and THEN, go on to how you were feeling when you broke it off. If you guys try to repair the relationship, ask if maybe you two could do some things with the kids alone...no x involved.  Start building a relationship with them.  The kids are going to be there always, and the x too at times.  But, you two should be building a relationship outside of the x with the kids. That is respectful to you, and your relationship with the father. I believe in honesty.  It has bit me in the rear a few times, but at least I could sleep at night.  Best Wishes.
642897
my husband has a child with his ex that is one month older than ours. IT IS HARD. but i love my stepson as much as i do my kids and i have always told my husband i would never come between him and his other son he even stays with him when he is sick and just got back from a week long trip with his ex wife and son it was for his son medical reason but i wouldnt have it any other way. Just becase he has a child already dosent mean yalls wont be as special this will be his child with YOU the woman he loves and that will make all the difference trust me and if you need anyone to talk to im here and know excatly what you are going thru just email or im me.
656874
I think the first thing you need to do is get rid of this man.  If that is the kind of life he wants to live, let him live it without you.  I know it's easy for me to sit here and say that, but do you really deserve a man who is going out and getting someone else pregnant?  I understand your concern for the innocent baby, but if there really is a problem in the home contact DCFS and let them deal with it.   Do yourself a favor and put some serious thought into just why you are fighting so hard to stay with this man.  You deserve better, no woman deserves to be treated like this.