The guy i am seeing is an over the road worker and has asked that i move to the town that he is from so that he can just come home every weekend and on days off and be with me and my kids instead of losing time between his home and mine  how do i know if this is the right thing to do??
202754
HOW LONG HAVE YOU TWO KNOWN EACH OTHER?  WOULD YOU HAVE TO GIVE UP A JOB?  WHAT IS SITUATION NOW (HOW OFTEN DO YOU SEE EACH OTHER)?  LIST PROS AND CONS FOR THE MOVE.
21224
Generally speaking, "moving in together" is a huge step.  And it hardly ever works when a total stranger picks up and moves in to your home "just to move in". If you are questioning what you should do, I think you are getting strange vibes from this guy.  He could be blowing hot air and just saying that he wants to come and see you. But it seems unusual that he's discussing moving in with you so early in your acquaintance.  If I were you I would let him know exactly how you feel. And if it comes down to it, I'd stop talking to him.
597860
Given that you live so far away from each other, I would have to say that he found someone else, and is trying to see what happens with that person. I would get out of that situation!!! Do you really want to be a backup plan? Find someone who is willing to be there and not play games with you.
323426
That's just what we're like.\n\nDeal with it\n\nor leave him.\n\nSounds like you like him, so don't be so harsh, just becasue you aren't available all the time to go out doesn't mean he should have to stay home because you are. Especially if you don't live with him, what is the point of making him stay home??\n\nDon't be too controlling or you may find he might get sick of it and leave you?\n\nWho knows... Something for you to consider...
33806
You need to decide if your in this relationship for the long haul.  If you are then his kid is a major part of his life and should be in yours.  While I know you can't be on call all the time you can help him make arrangements for getting around.  He is also going to have to adjust his life for a few months and realize that there may be times when he simply can't be some where.  However, he should always be there for his kid and if your committed to this relationship so should you.
172878
I think it is acceptable to ask if the right time presents itself. So set the conversation to where you can mention it, nonchalantly. Regardless though it is important for you to figure out is this a job you really want, are you tired of your old job? If so go for it anyways regardless of the salary. Your family will support you.
41063
From personal experience and I also have friends trying to make long distance work. Its sooooo hard! No matter how much you like or love that person its nearly impossible, especially since you both live in two different states. Have you ever heard of the expression, The right person but the wrong time. Dont hold each other back.
364911
Why is just the weekends you see him?  He could be married. If you know he isn't and it's just a question of schedules or locations then you should talk about moving in or changing something that will fit your needs.  You don't need to move in together as its only been a year but maybe moving closer together or spending a few nights over at each other's place would be in order I would think. \n\nAs you guys aren't exclusive yet go see the other guy there's nothing wrong with seeing if you are making the right decision.  But I'd also but the boyfriend on notice that you aren't happy with the way things are and that you seeing other people isn't out of the question.  As I'm sure it's in his realm of probabilities as well.  I don't know his line of work or why you only see him on the weekends so I can only speculate.\n\nHowever one thing I'm sure of.  If he knows of the situation and hasn't done anything about he doesn't plan on doing anything about it.
521819
My first questions are 1) how old are you and 2) why are you thinking of moving to Phoenix?  Is this for work, school, both, something else?\n\nIt sounds as if your boyfriend isn't really into this.  It sounds like he likes to stay where he is.  He may or not have a homegirl; I don't know.  \n\nI think you should go if you really want to move to Phoenix.  If you try to force him, he either won't go at all, or will go and then resent you.  I'm sorry but it sounds like a break-up is going to happen because your lives are going in different directions.\n\nIf you move, though, you will be doing what is best for you and what you really want to do.  So go for it.  Sometimes people aren't in the same place in their lives, and it's regrettable, but it happens.  I'm sorry.  You know in your heart of hearts what the right thing to do is -- so do it.  Don't compromise what you really want to do, and don't put your life on hold for a man.\n\nGood luck, no matter what you decide to do.  But whatever it is, I hope that you get your life on track and do what's right for you.  Let him keep up with you, or go his own way.\n\nCheers, K
166212
Ask yourself the hard questions, take your time answering them, and then take action.\n\nIs this your forever man and you need him to get over a few issues, or were you guys pretty much on the way to breaking up until a child complicated things?\n\nWhat are you going to do for a job now?  Where do you want to be in the future?  How can you get there while making a living now?  \n\nWhich town would be better for you and your child?  (The dad doesn't count unless you are keeping him--two hours is not a long drive to visit your kid a few times a month.)  If there is plenty of employment in both places, you might want to move where you will be closer to the love and support of friends and family.  If you moved out of a town that only has jobs at WalMart and McDonalds, you might want to stay in or move to a city with more opportunity.  (Don't move back in with the folks if there is any way to avoid it--move close to them and get them to babysit.)  \n\nLife is a journey and you have to draw your own map.  It is tempting to wander through it without a plan, but most people that do stop wandering and stay in the same place forever.  You don't need to figure out the details, just your direction.  The details work themselves out if you keep pushing yourself in the right direction.
217732
You need to set aside time that is just for the both of you. It may not be easy because he works, but you need to take control of the situation. \n\nTry and arrange a weekend away. It could even be at a hotel down the road, but the change of environment will do you both a lot of good. Arrange to go out for a meal, both of you dress up. Have the idea that it's a date in your head to make it more exciting.
113692
Wow, that is a big decision.  Colorado for the most part is a wonderful place but I think it is important to do what is best for you regardless of the location.  My biggest concern about this boy is that here he is asking you to come and be with him but he isn't even willing to go back to your state to see you.  To me that is selfish and shows that he really isn't in love with you.  My biggest fear is that you would get out to Colorado and then he would dump you and you would be stuck out there away from family and friends on your own.  Even if things worked out between the two of you, wouldn't you want to go home sometimes and visit family and friends?  Would he be willing to go with you like a real boyfriend or would you be stuck doing that on your own with him complaining about your going?  It just doesn't seem like a very good choice.  If you decide to move to Colorado, do it for you and not for him.
552788
that is the start of a booty call and if he works out of town that might be were his family live like his wife and kids ! \n\nwatch out this does not sound right ! ♠
567166
I'd really discourage you moving just to be near him. As you said, he'll likely be deployed soon and then you'd be left there by yourself. Since you aren't married you would have limited support and access to base resources. If it is meant to be, your relationship will survive this. If not...at least you will be moving forward in your career.\n\nGood luck.
560961
Don't move out there unless you already are serious, sure that you love him, sure that there are no hidden problems that you can't deal with, and sure that you will either marry him or be able and happy to build a new life there if marriage plans fall through.\nIt sounds like he is not the one for you.  If that's so, don't try to fit him into that position.  Wait for the man you feel good about.
154781
I live about an hour away from my boyfriend; it has its challenges, yeah, but it works out pretty good. I think as long as you continue to communicate throughout the week you should do great - spending weekends together is awesome.\nWe've been seeing each other for almost 2 years now. \nGood luck!!
671604
It all depends on what direction you want your life to take.  Is this a career move that will fit into your 5-year plan?  Does this person also fit into this plan?  Do you see a future with them?\nAlso, if you love the city life, moving back to a rural town is going to be awfully boring.\nRemind yourself why you moved in the first place.  Do you want to go back to your old way of life?\nIn the end, it's your decision.  Good Luck.  Make the right one.