I'm really worried that I wont be able to destinguish between flirting and just making friends with boys. I know I'm clueless, but I don't know any boys. Could someone explain the difference between fliting and just making friends? I've heard that flirting is when you laugh at a persons jokes, what if you just think they are funny though?
205433
Flirting is when you intentionally do things for the purpose of impressing a boy or when you lead them on, giving them the impression that you want them, whether by laughing, "eyeing" or anything that attracts attention. When you are just yourself and you don't over/under do things, and you're very honest about your intentions, then you're just out to make friends. In which case you may have boundaries set on how the relationship goes.
415807
friendship? let's see... friends and boy/girlfriends are quite similar in lots of ways... coz they both need love, understanding and a little (yeah, little) compatibility to establish them. but i have to say friendship is better than boy/girlfriends.. why? because you don't have to be too loyal to a single friend right? the better the merrier.. in a boy/girlfriend relationship, you are comitted only to a single person and that's why it sucks!\n\nfriendship, in general is when you don't even mind if you are single when you are already 90 years old. friends are given to us for comfort and someone you can joke to without them being insulted...friends never hurt you... friendship is build when you found someone who compromises and complements you in every way. \n\nfriendship is, well,,, friendship... =)
542137
Maybe you are doing what you might think of as harmless flirting, but apparently your friends dont think so. They think its inconsiderate and disrespectful to them. All you can do is apologize and back off when thier boyfriends are around.
265265
Hmm....I don't even do it intentionally...it just happens...esp non-verbal flirting. Yeah, sure it is fun, but I don't intentionally decide I wanna have fun and so let's flirt. It just happens naturally when I see/meet a man and we strike some kinda initial chemistry. And sometimes when people go too far when they are flirting, it can really turn me off. I think flirting should be subtle and classy. Well, atleast for me :).
593056
It's much easier to flirt as a girl than it is as a guy, so I'm sure you won't have much of a problem.  Guys just want attention, so as long as you're friendly and fun to be around you're going to do just fine.  Just watch out for the guys who are only interested in getting in your pants.  (Unless that's what you want) ;)
530117
yes, as mentioned, confidence is key.\nbut not too much- you'll come off as cocky.\nsmiling a lot is a must when flirting; it just\ngives off that flirty vibe. compliments dont\nhurt as well. touching is good also, but not\nin excess. by that i mean like touching his arm\nwhile laughin at something he said, etc. \nyou probably flirt all the time and dont even\nrealize it. flirting is like a sport- its all about \nyour technique. once you have yours down-pat,\nflirting will be your second language. :]\n\ngood luck to you!!
167955
wow i'm in a very similar situation right now and its tough.  if you are having a conversation with him, try to touch his arm as your making a point.  it also wouldnt be a bad idea to simply say "you're really cute".  its better to let them know that you like them than to never try at all.  good luck, e-mail me if you have any more questions
36735
r u 11? if so i have advice for u. (im 11) we have a dance at the end of the school year and i had a best friend named michael. everyone had dates already and i decided 2 ask him. after discussing it w/my friend, i went up 2 him at recess and said, "can i talk 2 u for a minute?" we walked and i beat around the bush for awhile (good tactic) and then i said, "im just gonna come right out and say it. will u come 2 the dance w/me?" he replied (after thinking about it), "ok. but this conversation never happened." u can imagine how happy i was!? but basicly, ask 2 talk, beat around the bush, and then say a sentance that describes what u want (e.g., will you go out w/me? can i be ur girlfriend?). hope it works! and about the other girl, just leave her alone. if she gives u trouble, take it 2 the teacher. just dont mention your boyfriend!
286833
Friendships is sort of like going fishing...strange but hear me out. When you first throw in your line, Either You can't get one to bite and/or if you do it's probably to small and  you need throw it back in and try again anyway. When the big one bites(meaning the friendship worth wild)it gives you the biggest fight of them all(what your going through now) it's either they pull to hard and break the line or the pull gets to strong for you and you let the pole go or cut the line yourself...What I'm trying to say to you is "The importance of your friendship is based on the size of your fish and whether it's even worth reeling in"
295415
Single is good for awhile. My guy friend reminded me of the concept of "dating". You are going back out into the social scene and just meeting new people. Forming a friendship is the most healthy way to building a romantic relationship. Your giving yourself and your friend, time to really honestly, get to know each other inside and out. Jumping in is never healthy. If your jumping in for the wrong reasons (lonliness, a "need" for a mate), then you will soon find your relationship ending in a firey crash and burn. Practice patience with your new friend. It's ok to be attracted to him/her but keep a level head and don't let your emotions rule your decisions. I am experiencing this very phenomena about building a friendship first. Together, we are keeping level heads, (even though he is just so dang hot), and it is much more fulfilling and healthy, than any relationship I've had before. The communication is great, we understand and accept where we stand with each other, and we're keeping the door open for the possibility of a wonderful, romantic, relationship to develop. I admit, it's not easy. I am still learning the whole patience thing myself. But this is so good, and healthy. I wish you luck, and hope that you will not jump in to something out of desparation. Be positive, be patient, and ask God to help. God Bless you friend.
448548
Aww, I honestly think there is nothing wrong with flirting with people.  It's human nature, at least in my own opinion.  That doesn't make it always right though.\n\nAnyway, maybe you could tell her that you are sorry about the signs that led her on-that you were just being friendly and did not intend for anything more.  Let her know you like her as a friend, nothing more. \n\nI agree with everyone in that you should do this as soon as possible.  It is time for her to move on, and she needs to know so she can heal.
535374
Correction on one of the comments given... Men, luuv teasing. Either receiving, or giving it to you.  And those who dont know how, are boring dorks.\n\nAs for your question... how old are you? are u working already? if you are at age to be flirting, to have a relationship and all, then you can stop the subtle moves that have been goin on since time immemorial.\n\nI'm gonna give it to your straight sweetheart... Just tell him while you're having those "fun" moments with him, and say: "hey you! if you're man enough, you might just have a chance with me."\n\ni always believe in confidence, both from men and women. and if he cant take it, then he's not good enough for you. you'd be better off as friends.  this way, you can test him. if he passes, then it might lead to something better. if he didnt pass that test, then you can move on and look for somebody better.\n\ngo for it girl!
309291
Find something else to entertain your time and your mind.  Trust me on this one.  You will most likely need to stop hanging out with your current group of friends.  And I know it sounds lame but try to hang around straight people more often.  That's what helped me.  My new found entertainment was photography.  Taking the pictures and  developing the pictures myself.  Takes a long time.  Depending on what your hooked on you may want to hit a meeting or two to help cope with what's happening with you/.  About 2 months after it was worth it because I had a moment of clarity that just hit me and it was almost better than any high I have ever got.
532904
No, as I've gotten older I've found it much easier to approach others. But that's beside the point really. What you need to do is force yourself to come up to people in your class. Your teacher, and your friends out in public. Just start by saying "Hi" and go from there. :) People love talking and if you get a big "talker" then you won't have to worry about saying much. Never be afraid of what people think of you. You are your own person and you shouldn't care what they think. If you say something stupid, laugh it off! I have to a lot. Goodness, just the other day that happened to me and I just laughed. It's like walking into a pole in front of a guy you have a crush on. You just step back, say "wow, that was stupid" and start laughing! It's really freeing! Trust me, I have actually run into things around guys that I've liked in the past! Yeah, it's embarrassing, but that feeling goes away after a while and you feel more confident in yourself. Good luck to ya!
267418
I would consider flirting to be any action that is intended to gain romantic attention from another person. This attention can be for fun, one-night-stand or long term relationship. They all have the same beginnings, just different endings.\nAlso, I think it is definately a female quality. Guys don't flirt!
473842
You're on the right track trying to find a friendship before anything. =) That's how me and my bf got started...lol ANYWAY just be like "hi, where do you hang out during lunch" or something lol i'm not that good at it either (i usually have guys do that kind of stuff) but just talk about something that can bounce back and forth between both of you. it'll help. and smile!
257986
Aman, I write this with some reservations, I really don't feel qualified to give you any answers to the underlying question in your post but your second last sentence touched a alarm bell. You worry me because I had a friend, an Indian girl, who suffered something similar and ended up trying to commit suicide, and thats why I am writing at all. This is delicate.\n\nYou have opened your heart on internet which is a brave thing to do but reading between the lines it doesn't sound like you have anyone to turn to in your life. Firstly, put the idea that you don't want to survive on the back burner for a while. The worst that should happen (and its pretty bad) is that you might have to make a major change in your life but thats not as bad as not surviving. \n\nI'll answer your original question, because its clear, but I don't think that is really the question. You are not a flirt. You seem to be a a very shy person with low self esteem and people like that do not to flirt, sorry you just don't know how. Flirting is an extrovert activity. You can't flirt without talking or at least making eye contact.\n\nReading between the lines, the real question is who is telling you that you flirt? Who is telling you your reputation is bad (what a horrid thing to say)? Who is manipulating you? I am going to guess that it is your husband or one of your in-laws, and they seem to have you convinced. If that is the case, I think you need to consider your position carefully. I get the impression that you are well educated or at least intelligent, but that English is not your first language. If I am wrong, forget it, but if I am right, I appreciate that there could be strong cultural bonds tying you to the situation, but if you are living in the west you will not lose your children if the worst comes to the worst.\n\nYou are a mother to two children who need you, but you also need support and respect, in short you need a friend. I guess you have already tried to talk to you sister about this (sometimes familt surprises). Is there no-one in your circle who might understand you?\n\n\nI'm sorry that I can't be of more help.