i have gone to councelling i have been to the rape crisis center but it always comes back to haunt me and i am so tired of it , i want to move on and i find this so difficult i am starting to think there is no hope for me
199973
no offence, but if you center your life around it and contantly view our self as a victim then you will never get over it. you can try to move on or do what every other woman does, start/join a movement or protest and "do something about it"
598824
I am  sorry you have to be stuck in the middle like that.  I would seriously consider going to see a counselor.  You need to be able to talk to someone and work through these issues.   Good Luck!!
309021
I'm sorry you have to go through this. Thats a hard desition. I would probably pray. Thats all I can tell you
46959
Just keep going. Have you ever heard "This to shall pass".  You have to pray and ask God for strength to with stand lifes challenges.  We are here until God take us home and we are here for a reason. God just wants you to stick it out.  It will be okay. You can't do anything about the past and unless you intentionally did something wrong (meaning planned it out), than thats just life. We were not promise that life would be peachy. Challenges, heart aches and pain are apart of life. Take care and GOD BLESS
577012
I know this is personal, but have you encountered any situations with rape or rape victims? Our dreams are our subcocious, and sometimes they reflect personal events that have happened. I am a rape victim and have had several like encounters in my dreams. I would suggest, if this pertains to you, to try counseling and see if it helps.
631598
Having gone through such a traumatic event, the side effects aren't easy to handle. You may either go one way or another, to the extreme promiscuous act to having nothing be done to you sexually at all. You are probably trying to fill a void that you feel you have since your experience, and by doing these things you feel satisfied yet completely guilty that you "have done this to yourself again".\n\nIt isn't your fault, and you have nothing to feel guilty about. There are crisis and support lines that you could call in your area..that would be a great help if you need to just vent and talk. They could give you information that you may need, as well as counseling that is provided in your area. Therapy could do a world of wonders and maybe you should consider it. What is there to lose? \n\nTake care of yourself and your life, and remember you are a survivor not a victim. Make sure and put yourself first always, and if you feel something is wrong (which you clearly do) do something about it, there are plenty people who will support you out there and not judge you. So go for it! \n\nGood luck!
675876
I think you need to be honest with yourself and bring everything out in the open.There are reasons why you hurt so deeply,the only way to ever move past it is to go through it.The first thing you need to do is to know your worth,that yes things have happened in your life as they do us all some more than others.You have to take it as a learning experience it will only make you stronger in time,sometimes we can help others through our own trials,its not always easy you have to keep going though.Drinking and partying or any of these things you are doing its not healing your pain it wont its a bandaid.Get real ,loose the crutch,try to find positive people to surround yourself with,then you will see a positive outcome.If you really want things to change it will also help you to know that,God is always with you even when you are not with him,I hope that you can find the light to lead you out of such a dark place,I know its there I found it so can you,you just have to reach for it.May God keep watch after you.
127631
Do you need help now? 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) \n\nInternational emergency links and crisis hotlines \n\nAre you in crisis right now?\nYou can call the National Sexual Assault Hotline, operated by RAINN, 24 hours a day at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673). You can also search for your local rape crisis center. If you are in danger now please call 911.\n\nBasic hotlines\n\nRape Crisis 1.800.656.HOPE (4673)\n\nSelf Injury 1.800.DON'T.CUT (366.8288)\n\nSuicide Hotline 1.800.SUICIDE (784.2433)\n\nDomestic Violence 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)\n\nGay & Lesbian 1.888.THE.GLNH (843.4564)\n\nChild Abuse 1.800.4.A.CHILD (422.4453)\n\nOr call 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) and be directed automatically to a local crisis center hotline. Feel free to ask to speak to a woman.\n\nHope These Resources Are Helpful. \nHang In There Girl, You Are \nStronger Than You Think!
77191
ok, here goes. Once you have been in a sutation. You have sloved the problem. Next time one like that,of that,nature arises you will have the knowlede of the last and a new one from the if you will "in your face". This is how we move foward. best of luck to you.
426104
why dont you try first of all going to counseling or therapy that aways helps thats prof help......im pretty sure its just something temporarily everyone goes thru that at one point believe me some more than others.....but dont worry you know we are here to listen and help w/ what we can....good luck
526919
Yes, my past comes and bites me in the ass all the time...some days I wish I could have a "do over"..so I could make better choices...I know youre not feeling sorry for yourself, it's just so frustrating sometimes...like you want to scream"I'm Sorry, I'm trying my best, I'm not the same person !" Hang in there and keep making good choices and doing the right thing now...
212264
Yes, as a survivor myself I can tell you that it does indeed help, but she has to be ready to admit that she was abused and it's not ok that it was done to her, but it wasn't her fault. Also she needs to be open to the idea that these surrounding issues that she is having may be related. I found that the more I talked about my rape, the less it bothered me to talk about it, and soon after, the nightmares went away, I was able to go out alone again, etc. Time doesn't heal ALL wounds, some wounds need to heal from the inside out, and that takes help, love and support. Thank god for my husband. You are a good man, don't give up on her, she needs you more than ever right now, it may be frustrating at times, but get her into therapy and get yourself into a support group. beg her every day if you have to, just tell her it's because you love her and you WON"T let this ruin your marriage. good luck!!
115391
The only thing you can do is be honest about what happened, and tell her how hurt you are that she does not believe you.\n\nYou should also talk to a rape crisis center so they can help you deal with what happened, they will give you the support you need and not judge you. \n\nBlessed be,\n\nGypsy
238000
Dont be scared, it is going to be the most incredible step you have ever taken!! Once you walk in the doors you will immeditely see that there are many other people faced with the same problem as yourself!! I have been batteling it for 5 years almost as well, and I have gotten help, the feelings in your stomach and the Hi's and Lo's will never go away but you need and want for food will return!! I am alot younger then you only 19 about to be 20 and still trying to get my situation straight, if you need ANY help I would love to help in any was possible!!
373512
I hate to be the one to break the news to you but, I have no choice. I have felt exactly what you're talking about. There will come a breaking point where you decide whether you want to live in the present or die in the past. I'm sure you've had your share of sleepless nights and anxiety attacks. But you have the power if you take it back to pick up the pieces and move on. You may never be the same, but why would you want to be anyway? Hasn't this guy wasted enough of your life and taken enough of it away? I promise if you just get up and put your feet on the floor and walk out into your life it won't be long before all this just feels like a dream you had long ago. Get out, be seen, find better, move on.
142909
Yes, it is child abuse. I'm sorry that you had to go through with this. It is important that you realize that this is the problem of the adult, and that it doesn't mean you did anything wrong. Adults are supposed to protect kids from this, and your father obviously didn't.\n\nThat said, you would benefit from a chance to talk with someone about this as it still seems to bother you. There are a number of options. You can call a local crisis center, a local rape crisis center, or your local mental health center. Some ministers are good people to talk with as well. \n\nRead this website:\nhttp://sophia.smith.edu/safe/Survivorhelp.htm\n\nHere are some adult survivor support groups:\nhttp://www.darkness2light.org/GetHelp/support_adult_survivor.asp\n\nThe point now is to talk about it, put it in perspective, understand that it changed you life forever but that you can move on when you are ready. You don't have to continue to dwell on this.\n\nBest wishes. There are lots of folks out there to help you out.
301591
although i wasn't abused as a child, i had a terrible experience when i was a teenager, i was date raped. i understand what you're going through and i know it hurts alot but you need to find the strength to move on with your life. anger and hate won't take you anywhere, it'll just make you bitter and it won't give you peace. i know what i'm talking about cuz i too dwelled on with my past for the longest time and i almost ruined my life. \ndon't worry though, better days is just around the corner, you just have to hold on and work on to getting well again my friend.\ni'll pray for your recovery!\nGod speed\n\np.s.\ntry to read this book: your past does not define your future by bo sanchez (this book is published in the philippines). this book has really helped me alot.