I want to share the ulimate intimacy with my boyfriend, and can't imagine being closer to anyone else but him (and even want to marry him one day). For those who didn't wait before marriage, but consider themselves strong in faith, did you regret it? Any advise to when I will know when the right time is? Do you think God would really be upset with me if I waited to share that with who I feel is the right guy, and not just marriage?
209435
The act of sex is an act of love (if done for the right reasons). The modern concept of a church and legal documents of marriage is fairly new. In older times marriage was simply commiting to each other, but no real marriage was performed. In gods eyes (I feel) that Sex is an act of love and if the couple involded loves each other and engages in sex as an expression of love there is nothngi wrong with it, just use protection (world is much different than it used to be, illness). I didn't wait, even though the first girl I had sex with didn't work out and we never got married that doesn't change that fact that when we were having sex that it was out of love, that's all that matters.
222298
My advice, is to be patient.  There is NO reason to rush things.  If you are a christian, then you know full well what God has planned for your life.   Pray for this future woman, and rest in the fact that God has control of your life..  This will free you up to enjoy all your friends, and not worry about if you like them, or if they like you, etc.  Just enjoy your life.  Being VERY picky about who you date and eventually marry is a thing to be encouraged.  Life is way too short not to choose the best.
30009
Don't go against your religion.  God is more important than your boyfriend.  How long have you been going out with him?  If he has sex with you but there is no commitment, you will be in much worse shape in the end.  Wait until you are married so you don't get hurt.
53504
Yes sir!  I knew I was going to marry my hubby when I met him.  I had several relationships before him and never had that feeling.  After we actually started dating, I found out that he thought the same thing about me the first time he saw me.  There was just an instant attraction, I guess it was destiny (not to sound corny).  We've been married for 10 years!
225519
You sound somewhat like me a year ago. I don't have Christian values, but I valued myself enough that I didn't take sex lightly. I waited until I was 21 and would have waited longer if I had not found the perfect guy that I know I want to be with forever. Stick to what you believe and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. There is NOTHING wrong with being a virgin and waiting until you're ready to have sex. Worry about school, that's the most important part, not what your friends think.
137903
i dont think your ready for marriage, actually i think you should wait a while and re think what it was that brought you and your partner together. sounds like your in a slump and very confused,  but best to wait then be sorry later on. talk to him and discuss how you feel.
242047
Please, please, please wait. It is so important. My husband was a virgin when we married and I wasn't. I wanted to have my virginity back so badly when we married but it was too late. Our honeymoon was great but it was bittersweet because I had to deal with the regret of him not being my first. It could have been the best experience of my life. And everything else counts too. I wish I wouldn't have even held hands, kissed, or anything like that until I married. It would have been so special. Please save it for marriage.
413392
well, I think everyone is definitely entitled to their own opinion, but let me ask you all this: Say you have been dating someone for a long, long time, know all about them, and think they are your perfect match, your soul mate.  I'm talking, that one person that is perfect for you in any and every way and you know you could never live without. Then, the first and only time you have sex is a horrible experience for one/both of you and you decide that because of that one time, the future between the two of you is doomed.....? To me, that sounds like a really stupid reason to not want to marry someone...if you really loved them, you would be able to "work" on it and look past it. Of course it would be diffcult to be with someone that cant please you the way you want them to, but with time and a continued strong relationship, it will happen.\nI, personally, am saving myself for marriage for both personal and religious reasons.  I'm not going to lie and say that it has been easy to remain a virgin, but I know that by doing so, I am saving a wonderful experience for my husband and I to share, as well as avoiding a number of problems that can come along with premarital sex.
177300
Unfortunately, most guys tend to think of sex first in their reasoning for marriage.  This is extremely shallow, I know, but I am assuming that you are looking for a genuine answer.\n\nDepeding on the person, there are other things that they look forward to as well.  I couldn't wait to decorate for Christmas in our own house, and wake up together, and open presents by the fireplace - just the two of us.  I looked forward to creating special "her" days, where I cooked dinner, and created an itenerary of fun things to do throughout the day.  I consider myself to be somewhat of a romantic...but in all honesty, I was really looking forward to the sex, too.\n\n(Of course, I had sex for the first time on our wedding night.  The case may be different for guys who have sex before marriage.  I'm sure you'll be able to find one or two of them to get input from on this site).
527459
I can't speak from the Muslim religous aspect but can tell you I have a female Christian friend married to a Muslim.  Their relationship & marriage was fantastic at first but once their daughter was born things changed.  His religion took presidence.  He sent his daughter overseas to be raised by his family & their beliefs and he refuses to allow my friend to go to church anymore.  Not to say, this is what would happen if you were to marry this man.\n\nNext, I am sure you have prayed on this long and hard.  If you are finding more discomfort, worry, fear or confusion in marrying this person than the Holy Spirit is probably warning you not to.  God is a God of order.  He has not given you the spirit of fear but of love, of power and of a sound mind.\n\nI would recommend getting into the concordance of your Bible and look up marriage and divorce to be sure you line up all of your questions, feelings & decisions to what the word says.  Read all the scripture from the Old & New Testament.  Write the ones down that jump off the page and meditate on them.  Fast if you feel you are not finding the direction you should take.\n\nYou can use an online website http://www.crosswalk.com to do some of your research if a Bible isn't handy.\n\nRemember one thing, no one can tell you the path you should choose and they don't know how God is leading you.  This is something only you can figure out.  Close your mind off to all worldly views and seek after God for His decision in your life.\n\nI will say from everything I've read on the subject, as a Christian, you would not be in sin.  But I think you would be opening doors to a very difficult life in comparison to waiting on God to bring you a Christian man.\n\nDivorce is not an option - it never is.  So marrying this person no matter what happens until death do you part will be a vow you make with God.  Be sure you are truly ready to make this kind of committment before going any further. \n\nKeep in mind, someone who believes in a god other than the one we know is not led by a Holy & loving God.  Therefore, you end up joining together as one with someone who is being led by something else.  Ultimately, their decisions and mind are not being formed by the living word, the Holy Spirit and our heavenly Father.  If he doesn't have a relationship with Jesus Christ than you are not going down the same path.\n\nI realize you must love this man very much or the question you pose wouldn't be so heart wrenching.  I pray you find your way and the life ahead is filled with much love, peace & joy.\n\nI am happy to chat more if you want to write.
636431
It is way too early to even think about marriage. You need to wait at least another year. If everything is as it should be, then marry him, if he asks you that is. Good Luck........don't rush it!
358485
Hi Ann! It doesn't sound like he's ready for the commitment that you want and deserve. You seem like you appreciate straight-forward answers and you seem to have the courage to ask him. It's better to know than to wonder, regret later and carry anger, when you could of had that time for yourself or with Mr. Right. Good luck....and you deserve better!
580462
sex before marriage with anyone is considered to be a sin & possibly you don't want to be a sinner.if you are getting married than don't why you wait for sometime.the wait is really going to be worth it....\nGOOD LUCK!!!
56115
I think it's a personal question that has to be addressed individually. It depends on what is important to you. If you have an absolute need to know what the other person is like every day, all the time, then perhaps you should. Or if you believe in love and what a commitment to marriage means, then take the faith that you love this person no matter what their personal habits. You can get to know a person's character without living with them, but again, it's up to you and them. As for strengthening a relationship, more studies show that it doesn't, but everybody's different. You also have to think about your potential kids and what kind of an example would you want to set for them? Years down the road what are you going to want to be able to say to them about moving in with their partners? That usually will reflect what is in your own heart and you should listen to that.
358841
I had sex for the first time when I was 17 and had multiple partners throughout the years.  I am now married and I regret not sharing this special intimate moment with him first.  I admire couples who had waited til marriage.  But when you're young, you don't always think of those things.
2571
Wait until the initial passion is over before you think about marrige. Take it slow. If you are meant for each other you will be together anyway whether you are married or not. Marrige is just a formality.
387910
I commend you on remaining pure before the Lord. Both of my children did also.\nAs for the feeling or lack of guilt, It may be that you deciding to get married freed your conscience , but I would suggest that you stay away from all temptation because when this happens Satan sees an little crack in your defenses, and he sneaks in very slowly and undetected.\nAs for moving up the date, I would have to know the two of you to make a proper suggestion, but I will say that approximately 80% of the time that  couples get married while still in college. They get pregnant and one of them drops out of school to work full time.\nPlease continue to pray, and stay in counseling and very close contact with your pastor.\n\nPastor Bill