when i was 18 i developed a strong feeling for my friend - a girl. we've been 'on' for two yrs (i was the guy in our relationship) then i broke up with her bec i realized that i want a normal family life. however, i still love her and feel that i cant live w/o her. we still see each other now though no strings attached, she also feel the same thing abt me. my friends said that im torn between my values and my feelings. i still like guys and want a family of my own; but then i dont know why i love her soooo much. so right now, im just waiting for the guy who will sweep me off my feet. i'll just hope that this time, it's stronger than what i feel for her. am i insane? am i alright? why do i love her this much yet i still hope for a knight in a shining armor?
200333
Life is what you make it honey. You have your values and you have your feelings, which d'u value more. I would make my decisions based on my values, because feelings come and goes, u kno wat i mean. It will get easier with time- Time is the greatest Healer.\n\nDon't expect too much out of anyone, not a guy not anyone. So your knight in shing armor may not appear like that at first, but it may take a little work for him to get there and for you to be his princess. It's just like mining for diamond in the dirt.\n\nGive yourself some distance from your girl friend. This will give you both time to get on with you lives. Out of the situaton, or it not being so prominent in your area, will give you the chance you need to make the right decisions.\n\nI wish you all the best
416039
Yeah darlin' it sounds like you're feelings are stronger than his at this point, sorry.From his point: I think it's hard to be best friends w/ a member of the opposite sex when you're  involved with someone. He may feel like he's betraying her. She may be putting some sort of pressure or negative input. \nAbout you  feeling "used" when he comes back after their break up... (which BTW their future break up is 99.9% probabable, statistically)..though I do see your point,  if you understand human nature, and as you get older you'll see this same thing again and again, very common, because people change, life is change. Change can be difficult, especially in relationships. \nNow as for numbering your friends in a ranking system, and should you call him this lable or that lable... I think once you guys can get past that "disastrous system" and began to see all the people that you really enjoy being around as your "closest friends" without the number/lable system, I believe there will be a lot less hurt feelings and heartache between all of you. Not saying we didn't do the same exact thing when I was your age,and it sucked being  #2,3 or 4 then, just as it does now. But since I did survive my teen years, I want to share that with you! My advice to you is to be the best friend that you feel comfortable with being to him, and her, without crossing the boundaries and getting into their "relationship space". He's your friend, she's your friend until either of them stops being what you consider to be a friend, at which time they are no longer a friend...\nMeanwhile use YOUR energy on YOU not him!  Good luck girl...
433865
hey sweet girl, b/f g/f r only a craze in school times. it's n't ur mistake , in ur age these tye of feelings r normal. when i was at ur age, i don't have b/f, and i don't want to b, but honestily speeking sometimes i also feel bad when my frd talked about their b/fs dates, gifts, etc. etc. even when i was in college i face the same situation....iat college time my frd force me to do friendishp, but i refuse, even now i m in uni situation is same, but u know now i m hapy on my decision....bcoz now the fact come in front of ne and ny age group.\nthat b/f r like a dream which never come true, but on the same time it gaves u lot of problems like main is daiting.im sure u know others.\nnow those girls r crying who had b/f. how can u trust on a person? believe me babay mostly boys  most of the time want only one thing from girl thats physical relation.\nlike glamour world it's a myth that if u want 2 papular then u want a b/f. i don't have b/f still i m popular, coz i have my own id, i m different from others. boys give more respect 2 me. they r good frds.\ni think u must take advise from that person who have b/f, who is older then u. two whom u know. who have life xperience. what ever i told u it's my exp.\nremember one thing if ur frds r true thren they will accept u as u r not as they want u.
276138
Love is truly complicated sometimes . I have truly loved the same man for the last 15 years , and only recently i found out , that it's never going to happen for us. It's a very beautiful thing to really love someone. Sometimes it makes you really look at yourself. Sometimes you even start to see , hey man i need to change myself . I need to really better myself! Not, that that is why it didn't work , but- they just helped you to see you could be better .           If you are smart you will thank that girl , for allowing you to feel the beauty that is love . Hopefully what you learned from that relationship , will help you in your next one. Men , don't have all of the troubles finding someone to replace their X's that we girls do anyways. You are born hunters , you will love again. I hope that you find someone who will love you , as strongly as you loved her , but it's only good if you will love her back the same way ! So , don't let your heart be too wounded to ever really feel again. It's really hard to be alone though , sometimes. Go out with your friends . Go do the things that you enjoy doing alone , you may just meet someone like that , and bam you will have at-least found someone with similar interests. Above all else be safe , and have fun! Be open to trying new things , and be honest! Good luck
111171
okay, the deal is BOTH people need to "feel" it to go to the next step, whatever that is in your situation.\n\nyou don't feel it.  don't feel bad, that's just the way it is.  you have the right to make your own selection, and this guy is not "the one" you want to be with right now.  in other words, your situation, and your feelings are totally normal for a girl.\n\nokay, for the guy.  the good news (AND the bad news) is that this guy's situation and feelings are pretty normal for a "nice" guy, also.  he likes you, so he devotes all his attention to you, thinking this will make you "notice" him or like him.  but what he doesn't understand is that being all clingy and needy gives girls the impression that a guy has no life.  it's not very "manly", and girls like manly guys more than a guy who acts like a lost puppy looking for his mother.\n\ni would say the best thing for HIS long term mental health would be to tell him as much of the truth as you can.  tell him you think he's a nice guy, but you don't see it being more than friends, and this needy clingy thing is not really attractive, and never will be.  tell him "you've pretty much already blown your chances with me, but some other girl is going to find you very sexy once you learn how to not smother her with yourself.\n\nit might seem harsh, but if you mean well and wish him happiness, it's really the kindest thing.
101895
yeah i loved more then nything else my 1st grl friend.i was jst crazy 4 her n we had bout 1-2 year long relation.then she told me dat she loved someone else and not me.an witout me knowing nythin c was moving wid him.yeah i loved her but i didnot stopped her bcoz no use of dying 4 someone who doesnt care.i had lot of problem initially but m tellin u no use of getin sad.its of no use.u have your own life n no one have got the right 3 make it hell.why should u care 4 someone who doesnot value and respect your love.get up from it.der iz lott 4rm life den that person get involved with it.n watever hapens hapens 4 the good.there r obiosly much better things hidden 4 u. dis may noy b the perfect answer you r lookin for but hope so it can help it.i myself have xperinced it and is leading a much better life.BEST OF LUCK
160250
Wow, this sounds familiar.  I have a guy friend like that who's a five hour plane ride away from me.  She's probably thinking the same thing you are.  She trusts you and likes you and wants more from the relationship, but she's afraid of ruining what she already has with you.  Which as she's told you, is very special to her.  If you really think it's a good idea and you guys can work it out to be together, talk to her about it.  She probably wants to be with you too but doesn't want to pressure you.  If not, always be a good friend to her and maybe there will come a time and place where everything will just click.  Good luck!  I hope it works out!
219709
when i was in highschool i felt the same way i was with my highschool sweetheart for 3 years before we sllep together and it was after i was out of highschool i was 19yrs old when i got my virgin brook and he is now only my baby daddy my son with him is 6yrs old and since that i feel i can not love anyone else since now i have a cold heart with men it is like i am looking for him allover again so make sure YOU wanna do it GOOD LUCK
252338
I dont think its wierd at all...Im actually in that position in my life right now.....Ive been through some of the worst relationships ever and at this point in my life i am very happy bieng single, but still want the physical active part from a guy....that may be why most of my friends are guys....I still like the cuddling and the hugging and the other stuff, but dont want anything serious......I dont think its wrong at all....you do whats best for you and if you feel you dont want to be in a committed relationship, no one should make you feel bad for that.
645262
I think you should truly figure out if she is what you want because no ones heart is a game.  I know you have been through it with her but you have allot of time and a family invested with her.  I also don't think its fare to play with any ones feelings.  I have also been in many relationships but never felt they way I feel when I'm with one person.  I believe true love only comes around once and I will never feel that way again.
315145
Absolutely not! Your only human afterall. Sometimes bonds with another person are so strong we feel as though we have known them all our lives when this happens it hard to picture our lives without them. I have been down this road a time or to. *smile* dear your normal.
432252
OMG!!!! i am in your shoes in the current moment!!! My guy friend of four years lives in Seattle, but is working out here in California. I so like him, but he only admires me as a friend, he loves to hang out with me, even get advise from me!!! what sucks is tht i recently told him tht i liked him & i feel weird & he's his normal self. i think tht a friend is unconditional, but we are trying to put conditions. i just think tht we have to hang in there & hope tht someone will admire us as, we admire them. sooner or later it will come!!!! Sometimes we as humans want to control, when, where & time. We just need to realize tht the time will come. We kinda have to open ourselves to the world & understand tht our love is One sided. Until then we are just hurting ourselves. they r nt the ones causing pain, we r!!!!! Be strong & hang in there. Somedays are harder than ours. But our time will come. Good Luck!!!!!
274864
it's about love and love is something that you can never explain the whys.it' not only about sex.you feel comfortable,secure,loved,respected but it's very hard to live 'cos you can not kiss your girl friend in public like you can kiss your boyfriend.most people still think it's wrong and taboo.it's not as long as you really know what you feel,what you want and know what you have to deal with.mostly the common reason is that she hurt by men.lost the trust.lost the will to start over again.it doesn't happen all at once it takes time to understand what you want.i think suddenly you feel ready to confess what you'd been hiding deep inside you.the confession of that you may have feelings to a woman or maybe you always had but you couldn't tell it even to yourself.there is no long or many explanations of your question.it's all about love...
593808
Define "normal". Normal is different for everyone. Theres a natural curiousity in this area and  I believe everyone has thought about it at least once whether they admit it or not. Does your friend know how you feel? It may be a phase for you and it may not, only you can decide that. You may be attracted to both males and females. You might benefit from talking to a trusted adult about this. Good luck, growing up is tough, Keep your chin up.
103094
I was in love with this incredible girl, Morgan, and I have never loved anyone in my life this way. THe great thing was, she returned the same amount of love. I wanted to marry her (I still do), but we broke up a few months ago. She said the same thing. She felt pressured. I realized she had never been single in her life after she was 15, and she is now 22. That's a long time. I tried SOOOO hard to do things to please her and make her want to take me back. The thing I finally realized was that I was making it worse. I was making her feel more pressured than ever. I quit trying, and after some time, we started becoming close friends again. I wish we could be together again, but she needs to be free. Freedom is a very tough thing to find. What i didn't realize is that i was the one who wasn't free. I needed to find happiness in myself. Who knows what will happen? Maybe we'll get back together, maybe we won't. I will love her to the grave, but the only chance I'll ever have, is letting HER figure it out. I have, for the first time in my life, come to a point where I don't desire to have a girlfriend. That's an incredible accomplishment for me, since just 6 months ago, I was in a hurry to get married and have a family. That was part of my problem. I wanted to spend so much time with her, cause she made me feel like no one else could. But love, as I found out, is something you do, not feel. It is patient, kind and generous. I can still love her even though we are not together, and I don't have to think about her every minute of the day. I can focus on my band, my job, and more importantly, making myself a better person. I hope that helps!
265867
Your feeling are normal every relationship has different qualities,and bring out different feelings, as for the first girl you have memories but NEVER compare them with another girl no 2 are alike.  Love is Living On Various Emotions. Just go day to day and don't rush or have regrets. Good luck...
643708
I'm one of the guys that loves to be romantic at all times.I like to give surprises that a woman would never forget In her hole LIFE!!!.Love makes me feel that Im the chosen one to be happy all my life,It makes me do things I didn't knew I could do.I feel weak and strong at the same time.It's incredible the magic of love,gives you unexpected cualities you can use to do everything for that one person In wich you mantain the connection of the word "love".Without that person you feel you ain't anybody,because its what you feel that mantains a pure and sincere relationship at all costs.