You don't have a 'relationship' with the guy who pumps your gas ever other day, but you do have 'sort of relationship' with your favorite bartender, and a 'sort of reltionship' with your bank manager... so the question is, when does a relationship start? \n\nIt can't be that it starts upon meeting someone as many we have met but don't have relationships with, and many we know well, but don't meet on regular basis, but still consider that we have a relationship with them.  \n\nDo we have to spend a certain amount of time with a person on a consistent basis to show we have a relationship? Is is a feeling? If it is the latter then what about a person we meet once, felt a huge connection to, but never saw again and are never likely to see again: what of that feeling, and that 'relationship'?
215842
You cannot define that in terms of time, there is a minimum amount of time that you should wait before considering it a relationship, 3 dates and by that I mean at least a 4 hour period of time with each other each date, but just because you do the minimum, does not make it a relationship, it just means you took the chance to develop the foundation for one.  Some couples know each other for years before developing a relationship, to confine it to time is a mistake.  I advise against making the mistake of believing in love at first sight.  I term that lust at first sight, ya it can work, but most of the time and I am talking about 98% type most of the time, it does not.  Make each other jump through the hoops that you normally would, no matter how much the first attraction is and define the time that the relationship starts after the 3 dates and when there is a mutual attraction.\n\nJohn B.
116622
Well it's best if you get to know someone before you decide to have a relatioship because he could be down right CRAZY! So get to know him and after say two months if he hasn't asked yet ask him for a relationship.
207054
Hello again Fantasy Foo, I've been were your at, and it's not a good feeling. One good thing about life is....Time heals everything. I was once told: If you love something let it go, if it comes back it's yours...if it don't it never was. If you have the fellas number or you know how to get in contact with him...let him know how you feel, but don't hate on his girl...thats tacky.
588796
Hi, maybe it's best to be friends first before get down to dating. However if you keep getting the" just friends" routine too much you'll need to ask what's going on that you can't take it to the next level? Ask a guyfriend or girlfriend - maybe they can see somethig your not seeing.  Good luck...
422257
Maybe you should not move so fast into something. I know you are excited and probably dying for you two to kiss and hold hands, but you should try to get to know this guy a little better first, doesnt matter that this would be the 3rd time you guys hung out. Have a nice evening out, ask each other questions, and really try to determine your compatability with each other before rushing into things. You might discover that this guy is not that interesting and feel differently about him, and then you will have to deal with you and him still working together. Get my meaning?
233193
How much do u know about thig guy?? U've seen each other but never spoken! SO what u have now is simply an attraction. In my opinion, and this is just my personal opinion, get to know the guy first. Find out common interests that the two of you can talk about.\nOnce u KNOW him - then u can start to GET him. :)
257044
I think it honestly depends on if you're male or female.  In my own experience (I'm F), those types of relationships can get really tricky, where you feel like you "love" the person in a relationship manner, when it's really just a deep friendship.  I say this because women tend to have different relationships with each other.   This isn't to say what you have isn't the real thing either.  \nIf you're male or female however....I'd say just go with the flow, don't rush and you'll just know.
76394
Well, when we know that a guy is married, we just got scared abouth the possible reaction of his wife, we don't want to get involved in those situations that only cause troubles 4 the couple and that everybody is hurt.\nThere's another reason: (My own experience) When two people have a friendship, even when one of them is married it doesn't necessary mean that never could happen something between them, I mean.. with the time of knowing this person U/she could fall in love or confusse the terms.\nI'm telling U this because I was in that situation, I'm not married but I live with someone since 4 years ago, I met someone, in the beginning I was just his friend and tryed to be nice, he was really nice to me too, but with the time I started to feel something really different and to see this guy not only as a friend, but also as someone who could have another kind of relationship with me, I even started to want him to make love to me..\nThat was really wrong! Nothing happened, he respected the fact I'm with someone else.\nBut my point is: is it really possible... I mean.. to be just friends?
211603
I do believe each person has that soulmate out there.  First loves are not necessarily your soulmates but if he is, you will know.  Your presence among each other tells the connection of your souls in love and happiness. That is the main thing to remember, be happy.  Rather, he is or not, you love each other and that deserves something. It's great to be friends and love, at least you know each other.  Good luck.
146240
No not at all, I went through this same thing a couple of years ago a male frined and I both came outta long, serious relationships about the same time and were feeling quite down and bruised by the whole thing and ended up being together alot of the time talking about it and of course one thing led to another and we eventually slept together and it just became a habit (I know that sounds awful!!) but neither of us could face another relationship at that time and we aren't into one night stands so we'd just hook up have the best laugh and then enjoy great sex before saying goodbye in the morning with no pressure it was ideal, it went on for about two yeras until we both just met people we wanted to be with and then it fizzled out but we're still the best of friends now (purely platonic!!) so it worked out fine.  The only thing I'd watch out for is that you both understand the situation if one person has feelings that the other dosen't have then it will cause problems and you shouldn't do it but if you both know it's just sex cos you have needs then go for it.  Good Luck!!
141217
If he has never been in a relationship then he probably doesn't understand what it really means to be in a relationship.  Like taking time out of your day or at least your busy week to spend with your partner.  Talk to him and let him know that a healthy relationship starts with communication and spending time with each other.  If he wants the relationship to work he will do what he can.
107518
It's diff. for everybody. Some have a lasting relationship with someone they felt that they're soulmates, some don't lasts. In my opinion, it's your soulmate if u don't even have 2 say anything and u both agree on something just by looking in their eyes.  You have that heavenly feeling everytime u talk, see, and be with that person.  When u meet the right one, you'll know, somehow it's built in inside our being that God put in us to find the special one.  It'll be hard 2 explain fully especially if you haven't experienced it, but just the state of euphoria that comes after you get 2 know the person. As if u can't breathe on your own anymore without him/her, and in your mind you'll do everything to be with him/her, no matter what!
64571
Wow, that's a complicated problem.  It's going to be hard to try to answer this because I can't see the details when I'm typing.  \n\nYou say that you've been alone for about a month, which is long for you, but that you feel good about it.  Considering that you've been in a lot of unhappy relationships, that's probably understandable.  You sound like you're putting an awful lot of pressure on yourself to find "the one" before it's too late.  Then you take out this pressure, in turn, on your boyfriends.  I think in your concern to hurry up and find someone permanent, you're pushing yourself way too fast into relationships, and trying to stake a claim before you really know that you love them (otherwise, you wouldn't get over them in a couple of weeks...)\n\nHowever, knowing this about yourself isn't necesssarily going to help you change.  You could seek counselling, but that's expensive.  Here's what I would do, when I feel like I'm acting in ways that aren't in my best interest (and believe me, that's pretty often): \n\nFirst, take some more time off from relationships to get your head together.  You sound kind of panicky right now, which is not a good state to be in when you're starting to date somebody.  Try to balance yourself a little.\n\nWhen you are in a relationship next, and you want it to work out, you have to think *all* the time about the consequences of all your actions.  Being a good partner is work.  You can't just trust that you're going to act in a way that is good for you and the other person, you have to think about it.  Every morning, think to yourself, "How would I like this day to go?  Do I want to accomplish anything specific in my relationship?"  If you feel like talking about your partner about long term plans, etc., *stop* first and think:  "How is he going to react to this?  We've been dating for X number of weeks.  Is this an appropriate time to ask this question of him?"  \n\nAt the end of the day, think over what you and your partner have done that day, what conversations you have had.  Did anything upset either of you?  Can you do anything constructive to make it better?  Do you see yourself falling into your old patterns?\n\nI guess what I'm saying is, you can't always trust your instincts to work in your own best interests.  You have to put some control back into your mind.  This may not sound very fun, but it's often what relationships need most.\n\nTake your next relationship slowly.  *Think* about the moves you make before you make them.  Give yourself time to fall in love, without worrying for the moment about the future.  If you try too hard to grab it, it'll slip out of your hands.\n\nI don't know if any of this helps you, it's the advice I would (and have, at times) given myself, and it seems to help.  \n\nGood Luck
90486
Since it's your FIRST date..... how about you just try to get to know each other before you take a "first step"\n\nEveryone is always in a hurry to zip around the bases..... they seldom really care who the other person REALLY is before they start "stepping".\n\nFinding out if this person is REALLY the person you want to "run the bases" with. It's a much better way to start a relationship.\n\nLasting relationships require communication and compatability..... \n\nPressuring or convincing someone into the "first step" is childish and serves no purpose except physical gratification.\n\nBut if you are the type that is concerned with physical gratification, more than emotional.... then follow the advice of these other people who will give you all kinds of wonderful ideas :(
195800
You are in a relationship... don't overthink it, just go with it. Enjoy what you have. Everything is a relationship... you have relationships with coworkers, family, friends.  It's more than just simple dating. And it isn't just a friendship. He cares for you and your daughter, I think that trying to define it will only complicate things. Enjoy what you have.
110166
A relationship is something that is a day by day thing. When the time is right you won't be having to ask that question. Good luck!!
160741
"I'm not sure how to say this to you...but I get the feeling that you're interested in a relationship with me and I'm not ready for that right now.  I just thought I should say something before I give the wrong impression."  Or something like that.  \n\nHere's the truth:  you're already in a relationship with her.  The issue is defining it. What kind of relationship do you want:  friends? lovers?  occasional coffee / movie buddies?  nothing to do with her at all?  Figure out what you want and see if she's willing to be that with you.  If so, have fun. If not, move on.  I wish you Peace.