your mule eats the legs off my rooster what do you have
214020
Two feet of my co#k in your a##!
103759
A SNAKE!!!!!\ni win win!!!!!!
160374
UNDERTAKER. I am the Reaper.
86095
chicken little, i would eat him up
55885
The Chupacabra (he eats poeple,animals betwin others)
176303
"were both farmers!" hehehe i love that joke!!!cracks me up everytime!
164846
here's a joke: ur boss!\n\nknock knock\nwho's there\nur boss\nur boss who\nexactly!!\nWhen you take a long time, you're slow.  \nWhen your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.  \n\nWhen you don't do it, you're lazy.  \nWhen your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.  \n\nWhen you make a mistake, you're an idiot.  \nWhen your boss makes a mistake, he's only human.  \n\nWhen doing something without being told, you're overstepping your authority.  \nWhen your boss does the same thing, that's initiative. \n\nWhen you take a stand, you're being bull-headed.  \nWhen your boss does it, he's being firm.  \n\nWhen you overlooked a rule of etiquette, you're being rude.  \nWhen your boss skips a few rules, he's being original. \n\nWhen you please your boss, you're apple polishing.  \nWhen your boss pleases his boss, he's being co-operative.  \n\nWhen you're out of the office, you're wandering around.  \nWhen your boss is out of the office, he's on business. \n\nWhen you're on a day off sick, you're always sick.  \nWhen your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.  \n\nWhen you apply for vacation, you must be going for an interview.  \nWhen your boss applies for vacation, it's because he's \noverworked.\n  \nA farmer goes out one day and buys a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, "OK, old fart, time to retire." \n\nThe old rooster replies, "Come on, you can't handle ALL these chickens. Look what it's done to me. Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?" \n\nThe young rooster says, "Beat it! You're washed up and I'm taking over." \n\nThe old rooster says "I'll tell you what, young stud, I'll race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop." \n\nThe young rooster laughs, "You know you don't stand a chance old man, so just to be fair, I'll give you a head start." \n\nThe old rooster takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off after him. They round the front of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap. He's already about 5 inches behind the old rooster and gaining fast. \n\nThe farmer, meanwhile, is sitting on the front porch when he sees the roosters running by, one right behind the other. He grabs his shotgun and BOOM! -- he blows the young rooster to bits. \n\nThe farmer sadly shakes his head, "Damn...third gay rooster I've bought this month." \n\nThe National Poetry Contest had come down to two, a Yale graduate and a redneck from Texas. They were given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was “Timbuktu.” \n\nFirst to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said: \n\nSlowly across the desert sand \nTrekked a lonely caravan; \nMen on camels, two by two \nDestination Timbuktu. \n\nThe crowd went crazy! No way could the redneck top that, they thought. The redneck calmly made his way to the microphone and recited: \n\nMe and Tim a huntin’ went. \nMet three whores in a pop up tent. \nThey was three, and we was two, \nSo I bucked one, and Timbuktu. \n\n\n\n\nThere were three little old ladies sitting on a park bench having a quiet conversation when a flasher approached from across the park. The flasher came up to the ladies, stood right in front of them and opened his trench coat. \n\nThe first lady immediately had a stroke. \n\nThen the second lady also had a stroke. \n\nBut the third lady, being older and more feeble, couldn't reach that far. \n\nTwo strangers are sitting in an adjacent seats in airplane. \n\nOne guy says to the other, "Let's talk. I hear that the flight will go faster if you strike up a conversation with your fellow
531863
A guy visits Spain and decides to watch the bull fighting. After the Matador wins the guy is hungry and goes to a nearby restaurant. He sees the special "Huevos del Toro". The guy tells the waiter “I'll have the special“. When he gets his food he sees a large portion of food and after taking a small sample he decides that it tastes good and eats with gusto.\n\nAfter eating he tells the waiter that the food was good but he did not know what he ate. The waiter tells the guy that he had the huevos del toro. The guy says that he still did not know what that meant. The waiter asks the guy if he had seen the bull fights yet? The guy answers that he had and he enjoyed it very much. The waiter tells the guy that the huevos del toro is actually the testicles of the losing bull and they are considered a delicacy in Spain. The guy was in shock but admitted that the food was good and left the restaurant. \n\nThe next day the guy is out doing the tourist thing and when he nears the same restaurant he decides that he is hungry and goes inside to eat. He orders the special "Huevos del Toro". When he gets his plate he notices that the portion is very small. He calls for the waiter and complains that he did not get the right plate because the food portion was so small and yesterday the huevos del toro were much bigger.\n\nThe waiter says "Senior, sometimes the Matador loses”...........
418422
How do you eat a frog?\n\nPut one leg over each ear.
233932
After spending 6 months lost in the Arabian Desert on my trusty Elephant Seamus, I saw a 6 foot tall Large Mocha Latte, floating on the horizon. In my thirst I ran and jumped headlong into the frothy beverage, only to find it was a mirage. In reality, I had jumped into a Bedouin Tent, that housed the Tribal leader. After such an offense they attempted to feed me to their starved camels. But I escaped by tickling their humps and went to find Seamus. Unfortunately, the Tribal leader had already sold Seamus to a traveling Arab Circus in the area and I was forced to beat him to death with a palm frond for his insolence. I then carved a canoe and attempted to paddle my way home. This was my last mirage induced mistake, as I was over taken by the angry tribe, despite all my paddling, and stoned to death with hardend left over falafel from the worst cook in the camp. This was perhaps my 3rd worst vacation.
194522
haha i am sofa king we todd ed. im watching it too. arise chicken arise
241553
An American touring Spain stopped at a local restaurant following\na day of sightseeing. While sipping his sangria, he noticed a\nsizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next\ntable. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He\nasked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"\n\nThe waiter replied, " Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those\nare bulls testicles from the bull fight this morning.  A\ndelicacy!"\n\nThe American, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the hell,\nI'm on vacation! Bring me an order!"\n\nThe waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one\nserving per day because there is only one bull fight each\nmorning. If you come early tomorrow and place your order, we will\nbe sure to save you this delicacy!"\n\nThe next morning, the American returned, placed his order, and\nthen that evening he was served the one and only special delicacy\nof the day.  After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of\nhis platter, he called to the waiter and said, "These are\ndelicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw\nyou serve yesterday!"\n\nThe waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si senor.\nSometimes the bull wins."
14190
it tastes like chicken.\n\nansw3r3r
133061
You farm animal! A SIZE FOUR? JESUS CHRIST!\n\n*sarcasm*
647358
a nice smelling red rooster
443713
7 x 8  Mule deer. Got it in Colorado, 2 years back.\n\nI have 2 Elks hanging on the wall, with 3 other bucks. Birds and a ram as well.\n\nIts a safari strollin' through my house.
164200
go sell your mule in the market for a couple of pesos and get yourself a prostitute