I AM ONLY 21 AND HAVE BEEN MARRIED SINCE I WAS 18 I AM PETRIFIED OF DOING THID BUT KNOW IF I DONT I WILL PROBABLY END UP CRAZY!!!! I JUST NEED SOME ADVICE AS TO WHA TTO DO!!!!!
210856
You're going to be just fine. The only thing you have to fear is fear itself. As you rebuild your life, do the things you want, get to know yourself all over again. Someday you'll look back on this and be amazed at how well you've done with your new life. What are you waiting for....your new life is waiting for you...go for it.
238000
Dont be scared, it is going to be the most incredible step you have ever taken!! Once you walk in the doors you will immeditely see that there are many other people faced with the same problem as yourself!! I have been batteling it for 5 years almost as well, and I have gotten help, the feelings in your stomach and the Hi's and Lo's will never go away but you need and want for food will return!! I am alot younger then you only 19 about to be 20 and still trying to get my situation straight, if you need ANY help I would love to help in any was possible!!
53176
Congratulations for starters.  People are very quick to be negative these days...so most people believe that your marriage will fail.  What is the fun in trying to be positive?  I believe that as long as you and your fiance truly love each other and realize that you are making a life long commitment you will make it through life just fine!  My parents got married when they were 19 and 20(because my mom was prego with my sis), and they will be celebrating their 25th anniversary this May.  No marriage is all kittens and cuddles...you will have ups and downs...and honestly it will probably be a WHOLE lot of downs that first year.  Just make sure you stick it out...ad always remember why it is that you got married!  I hope that you have a wonderful life with your husband!
60840
I got married @ 19, it would have probably been better had we waited. You change some much from 19 to 31. There is a comfort in being with someone you have known for so long.   But, overall I don't regret it, other than one huge mistake on his part, we have had a good life and 3 beautiful kids. P.S. For me the twenties were the hardest
491480
I just got married and im 21....my husband is 21 also and we are very happy.  We have know each other for years and are both working with great jobs.....He is a US Marine and i am a teacher.  I dont think u can put a number (age) for marriage.....i dont think it works that way.  Its about the way you feel and if you yourself is ready for something as big as marriage.  Age is just a number.
85323
I am 19 also and have been married for 2 years. Be sure you are ready for marriage. If your love is true, you will be fine. Follow your heart. Don't try to grow up too fast though... you don't want to live with regrets.
303103
im not afraid of commitment but im totally scared 2 death of marriage.\n\ni guess im not d motherly figure
631123
First of all, your age matters. I didn't see your age, but assuming that you are of age, 19 +, you just have to set the record straight.\nI married my sweetheart when I was 20, and we have had our problems, but we have never once regretted what we did. We love each other, and now our parents accept it.\nOf course, when we first got together, our parents were the same. We ended up having a huge fallout, and we both told our parents that with or without their blessings, we were going to have our own successes and failures, and we would like their support, but that is all. If we fail, be there, if we succeed, please congratulate us. Most of all be happy, if you can't we don't need you running our lives, as when we were younger. Thank them for their love and concern, but they must allow you, as they did, fail or succeed on your own.\nAll is well now, we all get along well, it just takes time for the relationship, on all levels, to mature. Of course, proving that you are capable to take care of yourself also requires you standing on your own, and not going running to Mommy and Daddy for a handout. It's a two edged sword, but it's worth it. Growing up sucks, but we all have to do it, physically. Some of us mentally grow up, others never do, you just have to figure out which one you are going to do, you can't have it both ways!\nGood luck!
396698
Be strong and don't have sex until marriage !!!!
571366
I understand. I don’t know what I’d do if I wasn’t married, but let me share some of the things I have learned in almost 20 years:\n\n1) Courtship is important. And long courtships are best. In our fast-paced world, especially as young adults, we are always rushing around. The best way to divorce-proof a marriage begins before you ever meet your mate-to-be, during the dating process. Serial dating, especially when it involves premarital sex, is a course in how to get divorced. We end up hooking up and then when things go sour we run away. Don’t get involved with someone who isn’t a friend. And date at least 2 – 3 years before getting married. That way you can get over the initial 18 month crush where everything about the other person is fascinating and the whole infatuated view of “The way you eat is so cute – it sounds like bells ringing,” to “If you clang your fork off of your teeth again I’m gojng to shove it through the back of your throat.” Not kidding – real conversation between my wife & I in the first year. I’m glad to say she never jammed the fork through my throat and I learned to use my lips as a cushion between my fork & teeth. \n\n2) Keep Christ at the center of your marriage. It seems obvious, but it is essential. Every time you notice that ring on your finger, pray for your spouse. It doesn't have to be long or even audible. Just a quick mental thanks to God for your mate, or a quick thought of, "God be with her/him." \n\n3) Love is NOT give and take. There is no take in love. Read 1 Cor. 13 (the love chapter). Love is giving. I give to my wife. She gives to me. If both are giving no one needs to take. Develop this mindset and remember that this is what marriage is meant for. Eph 5 takes a lot of heat for telling wives to submit to their husbands. But it also tells husbands to submit to their wives. Give + give = love. Give + take = selfishness = unhappy = divorce.\n\n4) Never use derogatory names for each other, even in fun. Husbands, if you call your wife "old lady" that is what you will see in her over time. I call my wife "my bride", especially when I am upset with her. That way I remember that wedding day, all those dreams, etc.\n\n5) When kids are involved it is easy to place them in front of your spouse. While time with kids is important & shouldn't be neglected, those kids will grow up & move out one day. Your mate will still be there and you'll need something else to talk about besides the kids. Make a habit of dating. Guys, even ask your wife out on a date. Arrange the babysitter. Often couples in church can provide a wonderful service for each other by trading Fridays (or whatever day is appropriate).\n\n6) Get to know and socialize with an older Christian couple or two who have a happy long-term marriage. Learn from how to treat each other from them. Remember that we all face similar adaptation issues when we are first married & they have worked those issues out. Talk with them about what they had to work out in either early married years and how they resolved things. This can be one of the biggest benefits you ever have, especially if you come from a divorced family or a family with strained relations.\n\n7) It may seem obvious but pray together. Have individual quite times, but have a shared quite time as well, at least once a week. And no matter how much you think it will hurt or bother your mate, talk. Holding it in doesn't make it go away - it only makes it fester until you explode all over each other. Talk and if agreement needs intervention, see your pastor or a Christian counselor.\n\nMarriage is very frightening - especially for those of us who came out of dysfunctional families. But the single biggest cause of dysfunction in my experience (and in my family) was selfishness. Give to each other & to the Lord, and you too can have a happy marriage. God bless you & best wishes!
27467
I hate to have to break your rule because I am under 28 but over 21.  I know because a lot of my ex's were over 28 and a lot of friends and colleagues are in the age range as well.  \n\nI know for a fact that the word marraige is like taboo for some people because they feel like in some way this thing that is suppose to be happy is going to be a bad experience.  When you think about the divorce rates and how many people are having marital issues a lot of people attibute those issues to be being married instead of the real reason- THE COUPLE DID NOT THINK BEFORE THEY GOT MARRIED or are not aware of how to resolve their problems. \n\nMany people who have even been in long term relationships are not willing to even discuss marriage as an option.  I do not know why it seems so scary to so many people because marriage is suppose to be one of the greatest achievements in life.  This person is suppose to be your helper, lover, best friend and confidant.  Why wouldn't you want to spend everyday of your life with them? I think this is one of those questions that will never have a clear answer until we wake up and start realizing the importance of MARRIAGE.  It is the foundation for a family.  I could go on and on as to why people  are afraid to get married.  But my honest belief is that people are afraid of what could happen (in the negative instead of the positive).  \n\nI have friends who have been together for 4 yrs. and have children together but when you bring up marriage they are like "What? Who me? Oh, I'm not ready for that?" It is amazing.  It never fails to shock me. \n\nI will be getting married in one year and I look forward to the day that I become my mate's wife.  I feel like marriage only betters your life. I am sorry if this was long but I really have strong feeling about marriage.  Thanks for the question!  I hope you get a lot of answers.
649984
Continue to be as wise and well centered as you clearly are. Celebrate that and just get on with it.  First loves does actually work out you know.  I am 40 and single so not for me...........but I have 2 close friends who met their husband/wife when they were 14yrs.............so who knows.  love is a mystery  and all the better for it!
106987
I've totally been there. It sounds weird to people that haven't, but it takes some getting used to. Don't think he's weak, or trying to trick you...just appreciate & enjoy it. What did I do? Well I married him!
609865
look here bud im 30 and ive been married b4.....but i screwed up and took for granted what i had. i am involved with someone new now and i have truely learned what not to do to jepordize this one.....who i am also planning on marrying in the future. just do what feels right....but when you do get married treat her right and make her feel loved everyday no matter what. hugs and kisses everyday no matter how pissed she makes you. if you can swallow some pride every now and then you should be ok.
153602
HHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH.. you are the most desperate , unlogical women in the planet that you are trying to link an event at th age of 6 to the fact that you are old and single.. i got to ask this back, are you still a virgin? have you had a bf? have you ever been kissed? \n\nyou failed to expose those facts to shape us in some kind of thinking.. then again, of course you have no kids!! you haven't been married!!! do you even know how to have kids?? this is the funniest question i ever answered! "Was i normal?" you were never normal at the first place
10590
It seems as if you need to clear things up with yourself first.  The only way to get someone to believe that you are ready for something beyond your comfort zone is to believe it yourself.  It seems as if you are scared of these certain things that are holding you back, but the only way your husband will see that you are confident about yourself and that you are not scared is to fix yourself first.  He will see what you bring foward...If this is really something that you want to be comfortable with but at the same time is a hard thing for you to do, sit him down, tell him you love him and that you don't want "this" to be the reason your marriage suffers...tell him you are willing to work on yourself and if there is something he can help you with to make you more comfortable, let him join in, that way he can see the progress.  If this is your husband you shouldn't feel the need to hide behind anything, he should be the only one to know you with no hidden masks.  Please, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and jump into life for you,,,everyone else will follow your lead!
426736
Just remember that you always have control over your own situation.  If you are in a bad marriage don't be afraid to leave.  Get out of that comfort zone and don't let fear of the unknown stop you.