Ive recently moved from kalispell montana to arcata california and  i want to go out and meet some girls but im afraid i dont know what to say to get their attention and raise their interest to hang out with me and later on maybe have it become something more. im a tad shy so its hard for me to go with the flow. any suggestions?
201972
MEETING CHICKS IN ARCATA:\n\n1. Wear a Greenpeace shirt and ride a mtn bike around town.\n2. Participate in the next peace rally.\n3. Register as either a Democrat, Green Party, or Socialist.\n4. Do volunteer work with PETA.\n5. Buy some quality Red Hair Sensimilla and hang out in the park with your drum.\n6. Go into Starbucks and demand they serve you only "Fair Trade" coffee.
120573
I just helped a friend with this actually. Two simple pointers:\n\nBe mysterious: This doesn't mean be so vague it's annoying, it just means don't leave yourself completely open to everyone. Be outgoing, but don't give away your life story. If you pull it off correctly, it makes it look like there's a lot more to you than there really is.\n\nListen: Become their friend, ask them how there day was, and pay attention. Don't interject with your own stories too often. (If you do, make it brief to show you empathise, but don't try to out-do them.)\n\nAnd for anything else, I would recommend the dating game articles on outpostnine.
247587
This may sound childish but you’ll never know unless you try. (ROLE PLAY) walk right up to her and introduce yourself, ask what her name is and if she’ll mind if you call her some time. Then do call and (TALK) & (LOSTEN) and ask if she’d like to go out some time this week you know a great place *Note: if you have kids make arrangements so that she can’t say NO and if she can’t go ask her out again (do the thing you as her husband knows she likes, it’s like dating allover again, but this time you have the cliff notes)   get creative, get romantic, don’t let your second chance blow by.
57605
A very simple Hi....how are you?.....with a big smile will do just fine. Or how about "where have you been all my life"? Or even....."You are so pretty". Maybe even a classic..."Have I seen you before?"....but act as if you really seen her before. Good luck. I hope these work to at least break the ice.
366080
oh well i absolutely love stuff like this.  its so easy! ok well first of all.. you should realize that everyone who is going because they want to and they want to have fun.   no ones going there to scrutinize anybody.  Well first of all... dress up and look pretty.  So when no one knows anything about you (you have an awesome personality, etc) they will know one good thing about you: you look nice!  So that will give you confidence.  And never stop smiling.  People will be scared to talk to you if you do not come off as super friendly.  And if someone doesnt introduce themselves to you, it is because they are nervous like you are!\n\nHere is how to socialize:\nintroduce yourself.  assertive, eye contact, say hi im "name", that you are so in sos husband.\nThen, ask questions.  (their name if you dont already know it) After a conversation, people always report liking someone a lot when THEY were the ones talking the whole time! so thats a good trick... because they will like you and you wont have to talk much!  Just be really interested in Them!  Tilt head, smile and nodd as they talk.  Eye contact!\n\nHave a bunch of questions thought of before you go so if you get nervous you can just resort to those pre rehearsed Qs (never a yes or no question).\n\nGreat questions:\nWhere do you work?  Are you from around here?  How long have you been in the area?  Who did you come here with?  If they have a job that requires a degree, ask where they attended school.  Do you enjoy the neighborhood?   Usually you should ask questions that naturally follow each other, and not randomly jump around.\n\nYou can propose a problem, and ask them for the solution.  for example:  My husband and I have been trying to find a good italian restaurante, do you know of any?  Do you two have a favorite restaurant?  \n\nYou keep asking these questions until you find something unique you have in common.  example:  you both have kids the same age, are from the same hometown, you had the same major in college.  Once you find something you have in common, this is when the conversation can be fun.  This is when people get into things they start laughing about and when natural conversation comes in.  At this point, you dont really need any rules, just talk openly and ask questions!  Just dont say any really opinionated things like "I think homeschooling is wrong" or "accountants are boring".  Everything should be lighthearded and complimentary.\n\n"Expert" tips:  Ask questions that don't assume anything... like, asking are you here with your husband? that assumes: 1. theyre not gay.  and 2. theyre married.  this could turn into an awkward situation!  But usually things are pretty obvious so dont really worry about that.  \n\nSo SMILE!  Ask questions, become interested in the other person's life, and when in doubt, smile and nodd!!\n\nNow have fun impressing your husband with your amazing social butterfly skills.  By the end of the night hell miss having you cling to his arm.\n\ngood luck but more importantly have fun!! :)
134188
If you live near Tempe, go to Mill Ave on the weekends.  There's a bunch of shops and bars and plenty of young people walking around.  I used to go to ariz. state U and that' where everyone hangs out when there new.  You'll easily be able to make some new friends if your just a little outgoing.
77699
Just be yourself and ask them "hey do you want to go get something to eat or maybe see a movie?" Okay if she says no thanks, thats okay because hello earth has many other girls so you have time to try each one and there is bound to be someone for everybody so if it is a no keep your head up high.
213648
The best thing for you to do is to concentrate on going places where you would hang out because it's what you like to do.. there you will find girls you have something in common with.\n\n--- Examples:\n\nSports: If you like sports get yourself to a game and chat with someone in the bleachers.\n\nMovies: If you see a girl sitting alone at a movie, find a way to chat with her.\n\nIf you like to drink coffee.. hit up a Starbucks and chat with a girl in line.\n\nEvery day there is an opportunity. Do not, and I repeat, Do not go to a club or bar to meet a girl if you do not like to go clubbing or barhopping. You need to meet a girl in an environment you like to be in or it ads to the awkwardness.\n\nA HUGE part of meeting women is having confidance. \n\nIf you feel comfortable talking to a co-worker or student, and that is what your psyche needs to be in- pretend the person you are talking to is a co worker or student. There is no need to psych yourself out and focus on the fact that the person you're talking to is a stranger that you don't know. That's half the fun of meeting people.. getting to know them!\n\nRemember this: The number one common factor in all successful relationships is that someone had the courage and confidance to say hi and start up a conversation.\n\nDo not be afraid of rejection. If a girl says no, forget about it and go find another one. Life is too short for you to worry about being shy. You need to go out there to places you like to hang out and have a good time. Chances are you'll meet someone in your everyday life... Maybe while you're at the laundromat, or the supermarket.\n\nLive your life to the fullest, be confidant always and have a good time. You only get to have each day once. In life there are no do-overs. So go out there with a big smile on your face and a huge amount of confidance, because you are a wonderful, unique individual and there is someone out there right now who is thinking about meeting you just like you are thinking about meeting her.\n\n\nGood luck finding Ms. Right! Look out for you--
424848
...the small town thing is a definite draw back, so if you're able to travel a bit to a larger city?, this may be to your advantage...\n\n...the one thing you have to decide is "what type of grrrl intrests you the most?",...are you looking to meet a very feminine grrrl?, or  one that's more tom-boyish?,...i'm sure you have thought about this?\n\n...your attitude is highly important,...be out-going, smile, and be friendly to everyone you meet,...compliment grrrls you like,...tell them how great they look in the particular outfit they're wearing, you know how much grrrls like to be noticed, *wink*...\n\n...try to plan a day of shopping with a group of friends,...pay particular attention to what you're wearing that day,...look your absolute best, without being "too" showy, if you know what i mean?,...give "them" the oppourtunity to "notice" you and how great you look...\n\n...over lunch, discuss fashion,...explain your feelings about what style of skirt, dress, blazer, etc, looks good on which grrrl,...then turn to the grrrl your most interested in, and tell her how great she would look in that particular outfit...complimentary conversation is a must...\n\n...once you establish a repore with the "one",...be confident, notice every detail about her,...her earrings, her lipstick or gloss, the perfume she may be wearing,...these are more intimate and meaninful things she likes,...so be attentive to her answers when you ask her about why she likes that perfume?...and then tell her how much you like it as well, *wink*...\n\n...as long as you're not overly aggressive, and truely sincere about what you like about "her",...there is a very good chance you may become very good friends,...then and only then should you share your "curiosity" in a private conversation...\n\n...my best wishes are with you,...oh, and one more thing, don't forget to laugh and have fun too...
447968
If you are truly attracted to her, then at 8 tonight (if she hasn't contacted you by then) send her a text that says "Hey sexy/gorgeous/sweetie (something of that nature.) I was wondering, what are you doing tomorrow night? Would you like to go out again?"\n\nOr something like that. I'm sure you know how those things go. But anyway, you say that so you have a reason to get ahold of her WITHOUT seeming impatient or desperate. If she's really attracted to you, she should reply shortly and probably accept your invitation to go out again. \n\nGood luck with this - have fun!
87262
Allow them their time to get caught up on all their lives first. If you want to be part of their chat, just listen for a while. For a while, they'll be re-connecting, so that's when you may feel left out. Especially when they are remembering people and places that you never experienced. I don't see why you have to be left out of the conversation though. My husband would join in, even if he didn't know the people. And if you don't get what they're talking about, wait till you do, then jump in. Or you could ask. As long as you're not purposely trying to be annoying, they shouldn't mind, and should welcome you wanting to be a part of the circle...after all, you are a part of their friend now, and you should be included in their visiting. And the next time they come to visit, you'll remember some of these stories and will be able to laugh with the rest of them. It's different when the girls want to go shopping. Tagging along would be silly, unless they invited you (even then, I'd decline). But, when they're in your house visiting, you should be able to visit too. Ask them if you can get them drinks, snackies or whatever. Make them feel welcome and comfortable. When your wife sees you reaching out to her friends like this, you will be showing her how important she is to you, respecting them in this way. Even if you think they are purposely cutting you out, go above and beyond the call of duty, and take care of their needs. Then, just sit and listen. They might be shocked, at first, but after they see how you've made them feel comfortable and welcome, they might just include you more. But, if you just don't know what to say, just sit and listen. I think you'll pick up on where you can fit in, here and there. Give it a try. And dig out all their favorite music, making sure it stays flowing continuously. What a gracious host you are! What a sweet husband! I'm sure your wife would really appreciate all your help, while she catches up on what's been going on with her friends, allowing her to relax a little more. Give it a try. <*)))><
31165
oasis, I have had this problem my entire life. I'm in my 30's now and am finally starting to get over the shyness. I still find it hard to talk to people I don't know and to make friends. What I have found is that everyone else has insecurities just like me. Some people are just better at overcoming them.\n\nSome things I have found that work for me are going out with a best friend and some of her/his friends. That way you already know someone in the group and can gradually build relationships with the other members of the group. Go out and do something fun with them a few times so you can reminisce about those times to break the ice.\n\nI really have a tough time coming up with things to talk about with other people, so what I have done is read newspapers and magazines and watch TV that has interests like those of a person I am interested in getting to know. That way I have something to talk about. \n\nI never was one for meeting men. That is until one man at work caught my eye. We said polite hellos to each other, but that just wasn't enough. I finally got up the nerve to talk to him. I walked right up, stuck out my hand, and said, "I can't believe you have been here this long and I still don't know your name." It impressed him that I was interested in him, and we began to talk and are now in a 2 1/2 year relationship.  Sometimes you just have to get the courage to start. The other person will often take over once you make the first move. Smile, be yourself, and take a chance. You never know the great people you  might meet!
246270
Go up to her and introduce yourself and then break the ice by complimenting her on something then take it from there.  Try to find something to talk about from what she's wearing or what she's holding, like if she's wearing a baseball hat, talk about baseball.  Don't be intimidated and just go with the flow.
79201
First go up to the girl, and introduce yourself. Nothing fancy, i.e. Hi, I'm Rick. Then say: You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. And I was just wondering if you would be interested in having a cup of coffee with me? TRY IT, IT WORKS ALMOST ALL THE TIME.
188499
Try coffee shops, book stores, festivals. Sport your colors and be flirty with the chicks- but not too flirty. That way if they arent gay or bi, they don't take offense. All in all, be yourself....... or give me a call. ;-)
333440
Tell her you like her shoes or her earrings, something small that is not near her chest or butt so she doesn't think you're thinking of her just sexually. It sounds lame but women like people to notice the small things they do to look nice. Tell her she looked interesting and you just wanted to see if you could chat with her. I think often the best conversation starters are movies, books, and music. They are pretty universal and most people have an opinion about what they like and don't like. It's also a good way to get a feel for whether or not you are compatible. If she seems excited about a subject or her eyes light up when you are telling her something go with it and try to explore it further.
143587
awwww that is so sweet!!!\ngirls love confident and down to earth guys.\n\nJust walk upto and strike a casual conversation. In the course of the talk.. casually slip in if she would wanna go catch a movie/coffee etc etc whatever u guys are into these days.\n\nE.g- if you wanna make her out for a movie.. just start talking about movies and ask her about her lastest fav. ..just say you love tht too and if she would wanna accompany you..\n\nGood luck sweetheart!!!