I t ha sbeen brought to my attetion latly that I am serisoly lacking in the self esttem / self confidance department. Wel I have always known, but it has been an issue latly. What do you do to cain confidance? How do you become a more cofident person. I know if I had more confidance, I could be so much more.What do you suggest. I know that self confidance is something that you cannot buy or just gain over night, but I rally need to start gaining mopr e confidance before i go of to college and am on my own with out my best frinds and family. Ihope this is the right catogory...i had no clue what to place it with. Tell your friends!
218576
Simply believe in yourself. You could do anything just as good or better than any other person, if you really wanted to.\n\nTake TV commercials for example, you've seen some pretty stupid ones before, right? And you probably thought, "I could do a better job than that!"\nAnd more than likely, you could!!\nAnd so it is, with most everything.
549467
Well your obviously seriously lacking self-esteem, which means that you need to start building some. Here is a magic trick with socializing... 90% of the time, if you have complete confidence in yourself as you are saying something, people will simply see you as cool simply based on your attitude and the way that you carry yourself. But the biggest weapon of all is to not even worry about how others judge you so much. \n   Maybe you didnt say the coolest thing in comparison to the other hotshots around you, and maybe you dont have the latest athletic shoes or the newest video game, but it doesnt matter. Most of the men and women within our American society are heavily influenced by the latest fad or the newest trend. You have a champion within yourself, and you need to locate it. Find self confidence by discovering something that you are passionate about, and then challenge yourself daily. Let the other chumps follow a trend, you will follow your dreams. \n   When you find self-confidence, you really wont care what others think of you, and you will naturally attract people and convince them that you are a "cool" person. Good luck.
248457
Just relalx, enjoy and be yourself. You might surprise yourself with how good you are doing it. Best of luck
322078
Sounds to me like you need friends who will encourage you and be confidence builders. You're going it alone and your shyness is holding you back and this is where good friends will step in and give you support. Reach out, make friends who will help you feel more secure about yourself. Some of us here list our emails and message links to be of help. Take advantage of this and the experience others may have that can offer you support and advice as friends should.\n\nBest Wishes!!
397481
I have body dysmorphia and nothing has helped me.  I've seen therapists and been on and off some drugs.  It is damn near impossible to change the mental view of yourself and no one outside of yourself and others with the disorder can understand it.  I think you just have to try and trust others.  If you feel that you need to talk more about this...then you can email me at foxyboxy1045@yahoo.com.
664566
Girl I am so sorry and I completly understand what you are going through. I recently broke up with my FIANCE and it has been so hard not see or talking to him.  I am trying to focus more on improving myself like going to the gym and I am going to get some certifications in my job.  Basically I am tring to improve myself FOR MYSELF.  I suggest you do the same maybe join some clubs in your area to meet new people.  anyway, email me if you need someone to talk to.
343142
You need more self confidence.I am practicing martial arts too and I really know haw you feel.I'm good but if someone watches me during my training I can't concentrate anymore.It's even harder at contests!Before or during the contest I keep saying in my mind that I'm good,I can do it,there's nothing to worry about.Try to encourage yourself and be more self confident
629182
Babe, I would have loved to help u out and believe me I almost did. But then It struck me that if u get used to others helping u out, u will become a big ZERO in your life.\nMy sincere advice - try and make up some sentences. U might make a few mistakes  but then that's how u learn.  \n\nAll The best!!!
344497
My advice to you is to always be yourself - no matter the circumstances. Never you try to be someone else. You may not know this - but some guys are just there appreciating you as you are - a cool headed nice gurl. Maintain whatever virtues you're endowed with. Great advice I think that is. Cheers!
494481
You should be who you want to be not who others want you to be. I am alot like you when im around my friends im crazy and i am so outgoing but when I am in big crowds I am pretty quite unless one of my friends are around me. I believe that you should be the person you want tobe. Have lots of fun. You have to remember you only live once.
73066
Learn about yourself. We all have special gifts and talents that we can share with others. Celebrate yours. If you have flaws that you think you can change, take steps to change them. Choose to be ok with what you cannot change. \n\nEvery day, take little steps to appreciate being alive. Yesterday, I saw a pretty painted piece of wood, I had a lovely conversation with my neighbor and I had a tasty piece of bbq chicken. Look for your little joys.  Smile and say hello to everyone you see. Make it a point to go out and find people to be near. \n\nLove and be kind to yourself.
533315
Sweetness, what you're missing is confidence in your own self. No one can give it to you; it's the sort of thing you have to gain by yourself. Keep telling yourself that you're fine, that people are just "looking" and not judging. Look in the mirror at yourself and tell yourself that you are fine, you are marvelous, wonderous, whatever just so long as you beleive it. I was self-concious in high school too and that's what I did. I figured I could let other people knock down my self-confidence or I that I wouldn't. I opted for wouldn't. Good luck and Blesings.
530749
First off, you should never change who you are to impress people. If you know you are charming and funny etc, than what's the problem. People always see you the way you portray yourself to them. Don't be afraid to speak your mind. if you're not comfortable in your own skin, why should others feel comfortable near you. like I said, people see you in the way  you want them to see you. You already began the first step...you took a step back and realized that you have great qualities.
280832
hello.  humans are social creatures.  its normal to feel left out sometimes.  youve been selected out of many to contemplate this dilema, so try to figure out why your sad.  go do something that sounds fun......a walk in the woods with your dog?  build a tent out of chairs, make your self a picnic, and put a cd on the computer while selecting a "fireplace" visualization for the screen saver.  ever try paintball?  its very fun, and you sweat alot.  it also is a great aggression releaser.  and as your improving your game you can do all the tips and tricks.....like learning the proper way to stretch......30 second hold with a feeling of pull.....but not to the point of pain.  lots of filtered water, cut out the soda's-they slow down your mind and body.  caffine jives you a jump, but you come down after a little while.  a clean water fix can last all day if you dont overload on sugar.  you could even start your own bracelet company, make a bunch and go to the mall and pander your bracelets for 2$ a piece.  you could take orders for "custom" colors and styles.  i just read today in Wired magazine that this one kid makes customs video game controllers for $500.00 a piece.  he uses arcade buttons and sticks, and puts graphics on the and non-slip base pads.  your mind has the potential to make anything into anything with an application of creativity.  have fun, and enjoy learning who you are instead of the herd mentality.
277661
Sadie,\n\nI agree w/ blackcorgie.  It is fine to be a dancer, but you will regret performing for friends.  Why don't you consider getting one of your colleagues to do it instead?
613061
you gotta keep practising. keep doing over and over again and trust me, you'll get it. same with dancing. i had diffuculty because my coordination wasn't so steady, but now im perefect. so you will be the pro if you keep practising. good luck
75705
When I was at the university I had the same problem for a couple of years. It was so good having fun as a young student. As Oscar Wilde put it, "I can resist everything except temptation".\nThen one day, a friend of mine who already finished the studies at that time, told me this phrase: "Look, you are throwing away yourself".\nAt that precise moment I realized the situation. I restarted studying hard and in short time I graduated. Today, I still thank that friend of mine.\nSo simple. You have to get to the point where you feel that you may be throwing away yourself. Perhaps that moment is not now, but I suggest you start think about it. Hold on, and good luck!