k so i was talking to my best friend online(lets call him bob). He told me that he had a crush on me and i told him that i liked him back but he said that he wouldnt go out with me because he liked other girls too. l8r bob told one of my friends that he was going to ask some other girl out. i feel hurt and betrayed. what should i do? confront him? disown him as a friend? or let it go and look for someone else?
203714
I would let him go. He seems as though even if he were to ask you to be his girl, he wouldn't be faithful. Guys like that have wandering eyes and face trouble in commitment. I would move on.
386372
Sweetheart. I know how much this hurts. He chose what was most important to him and that was his friends and not you. If he loves you, Then YOU would have been his choice instead of his friends. I am pretty sure you wouldn't have minded hanging out with all those friends, but the girl that intrudes was in the middle. You deserve SO much better than that! If I were you...I would try to get over this guy. \nI am sure you told him how you feel already, but if you haven't, do that. You are going to have to have closure. \nMove on by showing him what he is going to miss out on by his choice. Always look your best! If you have any good looking guy friends that are single...Spend some time in the public eye with them. \nDon't go out with anyone else until you are ready, but do move on. \nHe sounds like a jerk and doesn't deserve you! It's true that a man will chose his girl over and above all else when he's in love. He didn't do that and he didn't deserve the chance to start with!
181504
First, sorry that first guy didn't feel the same.  Second, why did your friend say that to the second guy?  If you like this second guy as a friend, then his reaction shouldn't matter, he's your friend.  But to answer your question, it sounds like he feels like you do.  He is your friend.  Your friend is causing problems by asking this second guy.  My advice would be to approach the guys you like and not your friends do it for you.  It may be tough, but then you will know for sure.  It will make you a stronger person.  Good luck, there are a lot of fish in the sea.
228969
Well, fess up first of all. Admit that you were talking to his friend.  But let him know if it was strictly just talking out of friendship or whatever it is. Be honest, if you were talking to his friend and you think that you're attracted to the friend, then try to date the friend if he's available. Don't keep leading the other guy on and letting him think that you're into him when really you're into the friend because you want them both or something like that. I'm not saying this is the case, I'm just saying you need to explain yourself. If he doesn't respond then let it go, as much as it will irritate you to leave something at that, you'll have the peace of mind to know that you did what you had to do and that you've apologized and offered some sort of explanation. It is his fault for burning any bridges. And remember to look at signs, this may be a sign that you're not compatible with him, if you can honestly see yourself saying that you wouldnt do this if the situation was reversed, then you know you're on different levels. Good luck with this situation.
437392
`Is the guy single?  Is he dating your friend?  If he is, would you want your best friend to stab you in the back?  If he is single then perhaps it may he may be fair game?  In any case, I would choose friendship over love.  Plenty of people out there in this world to date.
290165
If she considers you  her best friend, then she obviously cares deeply for you.  Tell her how much it hurts you, and how you feel about her.  Maybe she's thinking the same thing.  What can it hurt?  If she comes right out and says, " I don't feel that way about you," you are losing nothing.  And you will get over it.  Trust me.  I wanted to kill myself over one.  Now, I look back, and WHAT A LOSER!!  What in the WORLD did I see in that guy??  Good luck.  Tell her!
509152
Okay i was just in this situation. I love my friend and we have been friends for a while. I mean we have fooled around and stuff and I fell for him I mean really fell. However he didnt feel the same for me he just kind wanted to do stuff. It made me mad about the whole situation I mean if you do try and go for stuff like this make sure your friend is feeling the same way torwards you. Dont pressure anything make sure it is the right thing to do for the both of you analyze the situation and if you decide you should just be friends that is great.
252482
I guess u can't. bcuz, the little things that girls/guys do means something to the other person alot. Would u forgive  him,if he did that w/ur friend? hey, cheer up, if he comes back, i hope you learned ur lesson and if not, move on. Cuz you can't let this bug you for the rest of ur life. plus, ur just gonna feel depress all the time. Hope everything works out! :)
245959
you really have to ask her what's the deal with what happened.but since i assume that she's your bestfriend,then i say that don't let a guy come between friendship.no matter how much you love him.and IF she wants him for herself and she lets this guy come between the two of you, then later down the road you won't be the one feeling guilty about a guy possibly ruining a beautiful friendship.
347000
He could have been confused and tried denying how he really felt... especially since you both are so close it would almost be natural for him since there's already a connection between the two of you.\n\nI doubt he was leading you on and if he wasn't letting anyone know that he was gay there would almost be no way of you knowing.  He probably feels worse than you do right now and he might even be thinking be that he did lead you on in some way.  \n\nThe only thing I can say is that the longer you wait to talk to him again the more ackward things are going to be.  The sooner you get things out in the open and talk about it, the quicker everything will go back to normal.\n\nI'm bi and I actually had a similar expirience with a friend of mine who was gay.  We use to work together and he was always touchy feely; I assumed maybe he was bi like me... needless to say I was wrong.  (Even though I now know he is as gay as gay can be, he's got this thing with boobs lol, which I guess all guys do.)  \n\nI felt stupid for a long time but I didn't want my misunderstanding to affect things between us.  We talked about it and I realized that it wasn't an option to be his lover but "friends" aren't bad either.  I knew that keeping him as a friend meant I wouldn't lose him and losing him was the last thing that I wanted to happen.\n\nEverything is fine now and we're still really good friends.  Don't think that you're the first girl to fall for a gay guy because that's not true at all.  You get a man with the caring part of a woman... all straight ladies want that!!!  Just talk to him and let him know that no matter what you're going to continue to be there for him just as he will be there for you.
215350
Well if she is your best friend (I'm assuming that is what b.f stands for), and she did that to you, knowing how you felt about him, then she obviously doesn't regard friendship like you do! The joke is on you unfortunately! I would suggests you redefine the quality of what a true friend is and is not! Of course your slowness to be to the point with this guy didn't help. Your friend did what you were hesitant to do and succeeded. You partially have yourself to blame. If this guy is a flirt, it is probably just as well she got him. Flirtation tends to lead to jealously and mistrust. You will see it unfold in front of your eyes, then you can thank your lucky stars that she got stuck with him!
273278
Ignore him he sounds like a very jealous person.  As far as the girls go...you said your friends.  There is no reason you can't tell her how you feel when no one is around and if she rejects you he would never know.  However, if she feels the same way...good for you...don't worry about making him mad. (Just when you tell the girl how you feel...tell her that you have something to ask her and you don't want it to ruin your friendship if she doesn't feel the same way and then let her know how you feel.)  Good Luck.
76838
I went through this myself, and the best advise I can give you is to let it roll off your back.  If your friend who is/was your  best friend believes someone over you than she was never your best friend to begin with.  The other girl who is lying, sure it would be nice to call her out, show who she really is, but then again, your friendship with BF will never be the same anyway, now the trust is broken.  As hard as it may be you should just try to get past this betrayal and find another healthy friendship with someone else. Sometime when we are in relationship rather they be romantic, or just friendships, we discover one side has stronger feeling than the other.  Never sell yourself short.  You seem intelligent, I doubt you will have any trouble finding a new buddy!! Good luck to you!!!!
113629
Wow, this is going to be a biased answer because this is one of the sweetest stories I've ever heard.\nIt sounds like this younger guy looks up to you, and so your friendship and spending time with him probably means a lot to him. Playing along with the crush has probably gotten you into a difficult situation. You have to really think about whether or not you have feeliings for him fast so you don't hurt him. Just analyze your feelings, is the way you feel for him the same as how you've felt for girls in the past?\nIf you realize you really do love him, take it slow and easy. You don't want to hurt him. Always keep in mind that he's younger than you and is gonna look up to you a lot and watch what you do.\nIf you don't really love him you have to let him know slowly and gently. Stop playing along, it'll end up being a game, a teasing thing, he could really get hurt. Continue the friendship if you can maintain it healthily, let him know you're his friend but don't play with his emotions.\nYou're not crazy. You're just confused. Spend a lot of time really reaching deep and find out how you really feel and go from there.\nGood luck, I hope this helps!\nPlease keep me updated on how this comes out.
162652
I don't feel there is anything really to be done.  The only thing I would be concerned about is the fact that if these two men are your best friends and you share everything together, then why didn't tell you in the first place instead of you finding out like you did.  \nI can understand the frustration and surprise at finding them in that situation.  As for the crush, only thing to do there is to get over it.  There isn't a chance there.  I would talk to them.  Be honest.  Why didn't they tell you?  Is there a trust issue that you were not aware of that they couldn't tell you up front?  That sort of thing.  I think it's the best advice I can give.  I hope it helps you out.
416039
Yeah darlin' it sounds like you're feelings are stronger than his at this point, sorry.From his point: I think it's hard to be best friends w/ a member of the opposite sex when you're  involved with someone. He may feel like he's betraying her. She may be putting some sort of pressure or negative input. \nAbout you  feeling "used" when he comes back after their break up... (which BTW their future break up is 99.9% probabable, statistically)..though I do see your point,  if you understand human nature, and as you get older you'll see this same thing again and again, very common, because people change, life is change. Change can be difficult, especially in relationships. \nNow as for numbering your friends in a ranking system, and should you call him this lable or that lable... I think once you guys can get past that "disastrous system" and began to see all the people that you really enjoy being around as your "closest friends" without the number/lable system, I believe there will be a lot less hurt feelings and heartache between all of you. Not saying we didn't do the same exact thing when I was your age,and it sucked being  #2,3 or 4 then, just as it does now. But since I did survive my teen years, I want to share that with you! My advice to you is to be the best friend that you feel comfortable with being to him, and her, without crossing the boundaries and getting into their "relationship space". He's your friend, she's your friend until either of them stops being what you consider to be a friend, at which time they are no longer a friend...\nMeanwhile use YOUR energy on YOU not him!  Good luck girl...
230619
My bestfriend was a guy and we started out like you but I was the one in your position.. my friends didnt want me to date him b/c they wanted him. Then one day things clicked and we've been together for two years. I say Screw your friends listen to you.