On the news, it was announced a cereal rapist was caught.\nWouldn't that hurt?\nHow do you rape cereal?
206630
All I've heard is that 'there's good rockin' tonight'.\n\nGotta go...got this sudden urge for some 'cream of wheat' cereal.\n\nBy the way 'keypitreal' thank you sooo much for enlightening all of us. If only all of us could be as intelligent as you. Stupid me...I though 'trailertrash' was joking...I feel so stupid now.
366754
Get arrested?  LMAO!  :o)
664361
i'm all for that, BUT what happens when a girl wants to get back at a guy, and says he raped her?.. or if a girl's really leading a guy on and only once they're naked and steamy does she reject him? (ok that's still rape and VERY wrong, but i'm trying to say that there are grey areas.) there are a lot of cases where girls wrongly accuse.. some girls get forced into it by parents who can't believe their sweet lil girl would bonk someone.\n\nI believe there should be a really bad punishment, but it cant be used unless there is solid proof of rape. I say the same should go for murder and child abuse.
319464
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.  \n\n\nIf a priest is called a white collar worker, then a nun would be a creature of habit.\n\n\nThe riot at Macy's was called a shopping maul.\n\n\nUsing deodorant is no sweat.\n\n\nI wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.  \n\n \nPolice were called to a daycare where a two-year-old was resisting a rest.   \n\n\nDid you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.   \n\n\nHe drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.   \n\n\nWhat did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine.
289087
yea, what gottianatomy said!!! what moron would come on here to ask medical or legal advise???? nurse:"doctor...what should we do?!!" doctor:"nurse, hold on, i'll ask on Y!A!!" i'm on here for fun, i have enough stress and bull$hit in real life! why can't these miserable people, with their bad attitudes try to be "big boys and girls", skip the question that gets their panties in a knot, and find a question suitable to their liking??? they are so miserable, it makes their day to lash out, and it makes them feel superior to ABUSE the report abuse button.the only things i find offensive on here is the scum child pedophiles, and the evil racists. life is too short!! i'm here for fun!!! i think your questions, and gottianatomy, bad karma, dj meirs, and many more are a blast!! you guys make my day!! KEEP ASKING!!!
500769
A pig is walking down the street and smells something so he goes there.\n\nAnd the man throws hm out some bacon and he eats it and he hears someone screaming when he did.\n\nThen the man throws out some ballony.\n\nSo he eats it and he hears another scream!!\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nSo finally he gets scared and doesn't know what to do until his mom comes and asks what he's doing?\n\n\nSo he tells her i ate some bacon and ballonie.\n\n\nThe mother pig faints when he goes home and takes his mom back he asks what's bad about that???\n\n\nand his mom replies that That was his brother!
467977
hahahah......agreed the joke is long, but worth reading it......hilarious one......LOL\n\nYou can make this joke a bit short by editing . I have tried with the first para and see the difference....you can save  one line.\n\nJack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack's minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.
169414
Ha I thought you were talking about the guy who burned his hand on a toaster and was asking for help.  I get it now though.\nIf you're talking about the Monday thing, I have no idea. How come I'm not seeing this info on the news?
620028
Funny. I heard one today too-\n\nTwo kids were fishing in a stream. W was crossing over on a bridge, when he tripped, hit his head, and fell into the water unconscious.\n\nThe kids pulled him out, and when he came to, he thanked them profusely for saving his life. He told them he would grant each of them one wish. \n\nThe first kid wanted to go to Disney, and W agreed to take him himself in the Air Force One.\n\nThe second kid asked for an electronic wheelchair, equipped with a DVD player, MP3, and Playstation.\n\n"What for?" W asked. "You aren't crippled."\n\n"Yeah, well I will be when I go home and tell my daddy I saved your dumb *ss from drowning," he answered.\n\nSurprise, surprise, the one Neocon I work with didn't find this funny.
117937
Get back with you in a minute...can't stop laughing.\n\n\nI'm back. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. Thanks. Woke the husband up. And , no.
294708
chuck girlfriend asked him how much would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?\nchuck was so offended at her rhyming in her presence he killed her screaming don't fuck with chuck. three months later he realised the irony of the situation and laughed so hard a mountain fell over
391830
A little boy was caught swearing by his teacher.\n“Tyson,” she said, “you shouldn’t use that kind of language. Where\ndid you hear it?”\n“My daddy said it,” he responded.\n“Well, that doesn’t matter,” she explained, “I don’t want to hear\nthat language in here again.”\nAfter a moment, she thought she whispered aloud, “At least he\ndoesn’t know what it means.”\n“I do, too,” Tyson corrected. “It means the car won’t start.”
571576
OK those jokes are pretty good and i also have one here waiting for you\n\nWhat did the pirate say after someone asked why there was a steering wheel in his pants.\n\nhe says: Argghh its driving me nuts! hehe sorry its kinda dirty but it was good (to me it was good)
245540
A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around, looking for valuables, and when he picked up a CD player to place in his sack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying, "Jesus is watching you".\n\nHe nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head, promised himself a vacation after the next big score, then clicked the light back on and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, "Jesus is watching you. " Totally rattled, he shone his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.\n\n"Did you say that?" He hissed at the parrot.\n\n"Yes," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you. "The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who do you think you are any way?"\n\n"Moses," Replied the bird.\n\n"Moses" the burglar laughed.\n\n"What kind of stupid people would name a parrot 'Moses'?"\n\nThe bird promptly answered: "The same kind of people that would name a Rottweiler 'Jesus'!
662011
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!\n\nIt's such an A M A Z I N G Joke :)\n\nGreat one Gurl!\n\nWe Want More, We Want More!
636506
That is so perverted. \na grandpa raping his male grandchild.\nEw.
229937
you need a shrink - someone who says they were raped and wants to know if they should tell someone is full of sh!t - are you that bored? oh, by the way you told someone in between asking youor questions? grow up