my boyfriend and i have bee living together for nine months we are going to his sisters graduation and will be staying at his moms house. their will also be afew other families plus us and my eleven month old son. she wants me to sleep in one room with people i dont know and him in another. this would make me feel very uncomfortable so i suggest we get a hotel am i wrong in doing this?
206726
If you really need to be together get the hotel room. But, I think it would be a GREAT gesture on your part to stay with your future mom in-law and abide by her rules. It would show her that you respect her and her rules. Plus it would only be for a few days. You can do it =)
546394
I think the kicker is that you are also moving in with 2 guys. So..really..you can't play the "I'm hurt and worried" card with him over this. It makes no sense to even try.  \n\nWhy can't the 2 of you just move in together someplace?
482705
You're right. This is not something a girl with a boyfriend would want to do. If she's serious about staying with you in the long run, she should find a way to take you along or just stay home with you. Partying in Vegas at some guys' house is something that sounds really really fun... for a single girl. And if she's around her single friends, they might pressure her into behaving they way they do, and she might make a decision that she wouldn't otherwise make when she's at home. It seems as if the main problem here is that when you told her you didn't like the idea of her going, she started "giving you attitude" instead of being sensitive of your feelings. If that's the way you feel, even if she thinks you have nothing to worry about, she needs to respect that and not go on that vacation. You have every right to put your foot down! If she cares enough, she'll make the right decision!
530905
Girl tell me about it, my bf of 2 years is here and DONT EVEN WANT TO BE HERE BUT KEEPS PRETENDING THAT HE DOES. And to top it off, he'd rather be with his family who treats him, me and my son fuck*ed up for no reason.  Hes leaving to go there.  He messed it up this year and last year...everytime I say he couldnt possibly make me feel any lower he finds a way to! I dont get it.
556672
I know exactly what you are talking about.  How inconsiderate can some people be? They are really putting you in an akward place by just showing up but I think you should tell them your house is full and give them the name of the sleziest hotel in town for them to spend the night and maybe next time they will be the first to RSVP.
497476
No.  Just explain the situation to him in a similar manner as you have done here and he should be understanding.  My family lives out of town also, but when they come, we always spend more time with them because we only see them once a year.  If the roles were reversed, I'm sure he would expect the same from you.  \n\nTell his family that you will have them over for dinner at your place either before or after they go to the cabin, so it doesn't seem that you don't want to spend the holidays with them either.
377815
Just be careful...you're still very young!  Living with someone and dating them are two different things.  Its very diffcult, even when you have a good relationship.  Why don't you just stay there for the summer and see how things go...and if that works out then move in with him.  I wouldn't just throw my bag over my shoulder and go down there without a plan (i.e. a job lined up, a school that's accepted you).  Your mom is right in being concerned b/c it seems to me like you don't have a real plan other than moving in with your boyfriend.  If you want your mom to accept this plan you need to show her that you actually have a PLAN.  Just moving in is not a plan.  Apply to some schools down there, and apply for some jobs, and maybe she'll be more apt to support your move.
361211
Okay sleeping at ANY other womans house when you are married is wrong. Leaving during a disagreement WRONG. Believe him or not if you let this go he will think it's acceptable behavior and he and that woman are the Only ones who think its acceptable.  It's all in what YOU can live with and what You can forgive.  WIthout trust there is no marraige..  Good luck
272502
it's her choice if she is uncomfortable with strangers in the house, I don't blame her. If they help while you are there with them then yeah it's fine but she shouldn't have to be there with strangers when you're not there. You may think you know these people but they may be thieves or rapist you can never be 100% sure, especially if they are desperate enough for money that they will do chores for you.
607031
well, objectively, they arent going to do anything they arent already doing. if you go to sleep and they have a wild orgy, its certainly not as though you going to sleep put this into their heads. they've done it before. the question is do you want it happening on your watch? i assume all the associated parents know that it is a co-ed sleepover, and have agreed to it. they cant possibly expect you to hover over them all night. and usually, girls are not terribly willing to indulge in sex acts while their parents are in the house. wait until you feel that you have done the best you can, then go to sleep. of course, you could always rig a trip wire with bells on it in front of the girls door.  kids will be kids, and that means that they will misbehave, but for the most part, are fairly good little human beings. if you trust the way you raised your daughter, then she will be fine. in the future, dont agree to something if youre not sure you can trust the parties involved.
73031
The girlfriend has no right to be there.  If fact the girlfriend has no rights whatsoever when it comes to your child, even if the ex and she get married.  I am guessing that your son is in the hospital because he is sick (or has some major medical issues) and therefore the extra stress of someone being there that is not wanted isn't doing your son any good.  If she cares about your son at all, she will respect his wishes.  What I am wondering however is how old is your son?
589483
this can get ugly real fast. 1st, if you trust your boyfriend,  it shouldn't be a problem with lettin' him go and see his son. u will have 2 understand that his "babymama" will always have a part in his life because of the child they share. that does not mean he can continue to sleep with her of course, but some men feel they got it like that. also depends on what kinda chic his babymama is. is she an immature childish, person who's bitter that she's not with him anymore? (not sure why she would make it a point n tellin' u that she's still sleepin' with him unless she's intentionally tryin' to piss you off) what kind of person would keep sleepin' with their x knowin' he's going home 2 someone else? Please do NOT try and tell your boyfriend under what circumstances he can see his son. cuz his son should come b4 both u and that babymama. u have 2 b the bigger woman in this one.
310506
This is so weird. My hub and i were just talking about this ten minutes ago. He wants to go away Memorial Day Weekend and I don't travel well. I said to him, you know i have a hard time sleeping some where else except our own bed, unlike you who can sleep on rock with a blanket.
257939
You arent being a monster. You have right to say that. It sick that she  wants sleep with her brother.
413692
No you are not wrong!\n\nIf they are separated then he has no business spending that amount of time under the pretense of visiting his son that he has on some weekends.\n\nMy ex tried hanging out at my place and even though my boyfriend lives with me, he would still try to get me to mess around with him. He has been re-married for 10 years and still tries to get me to "get away" with him.\n\nThere is a reason that your man hangs out at her house and I doubt that it is the kid. He is going through the motions of still living with her and it is wrong of him to be doing that if he has any consideration for your feelings.\n\nEveryone here is saying "trust him" and "he should spend time with his son"\nWell dear, you can not trust him because he failed you when he told you he would stop and he has the chance to spend time with his son and does not have any excuse to be at her house.\nTrust is one thing...denial and blindness are another!\nYour relationship already has a poor foundation...why keep building on it?
12129
i think maybe you need to find a compromise between the two. You can ask him to not have his friend sleep over, but dont ask him not to visit. having close friends is really important, and if he and his bud are as close as they sound it will cause some tension between you and your soon-to-be hubby. Let him know that you feel left out when his friend is over, and that you feel like its causing you to have resentment for that friend, which is obviously something you dont want. hopefully he will take a minute to think about how things are affecting you, and alter his behavipr accordingly.
522553
I wouldnt worry about it if I where you althought it might make you furious let her think what she wants it's that type of gossip that might fill her less than fulfilling days so in fact your doing the old lady a favour by giving her something to do, Just as long as you and your hubby are straight in understanding the situation then every thing is cool cause at the end of the day he is your real family,under your roof in your bed is what matters the most of what is though of you.