Here is the deal.  Me and My Gilrfriend have been together for 3 years.  About a month ago she starts being really distant.  Come to find out she says she has been seeing someone else(sex) About 2 weeks before she started being distant so total about 6 weeks.  She says she's pregnant.  So it could either be mine or the mystery man.  She won't know exactly how far along she is until wednesday.  I still love her.  But what should I do.  I mean if it's mine should I try and work things out.  She said that she did not love the mystery man it was just a thing.  Should I say F#$k off and take care of the baby.  Then if it's not mine should I say F#$k off all together.  Abortion is always an option.  Please real answers.  I have no one else to talk to.  I will gladly give away 10 points for some good advice.
207871
Whoa....nasty scenario. Not sure I'm qualified to answer this, but let's see...\n\nIf the baby is yours you should definitely take care of it. I have an 18 month old girl and she is the center of my world.\n\n If you are considering an abortion you need to ask yourself if you can live with that. Some people can't, and regret it for the rest of their lives. Depends on who you are I guess.\n\nIf it's not yours, you need to decide how much you love/want the mother. I'd be concerned because she's not only having sex, she's having unprotected sex. You could catch something very nasty if she keeps that up. Also ask yourself, how would you deal with it if she did this again??\n\nIf you love her deeply, and the child is yours, see if you can work it out, but remember that you may not be able to trust her\n\nIf it is not yours, then decide if you can handle that and stay with her. If not, she's history, and no regrets. Find someone who won't cheat on you.\n\nIf you can't stand her anymore and the baby is yours, fight for custody. It will be worth it in the end.
50030
My best friend started seeing her boyfriend in August, lost her virginity to him within a week of them seeing one another. (She'd already moved out, and lived on her own.) Within two weeks he moved in, and they've been living together ever since. I emailed her the other day, because I wanted someone to talk to, and she never replied. I don't have her new cell phone number, because she never gave it to me after she got on his plan...and the only time I hear from her is if there is a problem in her life, and very seldom then. I haven't heard her voice since new years. \n\nSpeaking from experience, you should sit her down and tell her what she is doing. Ask her whether or not she wants to abandon her family for a guy. Ask her if she wants to get pregnant and become a mother before she has the opporunity to do anything else. Tell her that you feel that she is really ruining her life, and you think she needs to slow down. The best way is to tell her flat out how you feel with no regards to her feelings, and don't sugar-coat it. She obviously isn't concerned with anyone but herself and her boyfriend. Also, you better do it fast. If she doesn't want to slow down, then ditch her and move on. Her failure and lack of concern for other people shouldn't ever bring you down. If she comes around, then be thankful, if she doesn't then you'll have to move on and just say that you tried.
338338
dear sunshine,\nI am a 31 year old married man with two boys, i left my wife almost two years ago, cuz of cheating, i was about to forgive her and take her back, but i found out she is pregnant.\n\ni still have not decided if i even want to take her back and adopt out her baby, she wants me back, i dont know.\n\nbut one thing i will tell you sunshine,\ni know i loved her, truely\nfor she had the capacity to make me the happiest man in the world,\nand yet at the same time;\nshe could hurt me more than i ever knew i could be hurt.\ni believe that this is what true love is, and that it is unconditional- no conditions, such as; i will love you if you do this, or not if you don't.\n\ni will always love my wife, and have already forgiven her.\nbut that does not mean i want to be with her....\n\nyou should ask yourself this,\nif your man got pregnant from someone else, (God forbid, :) ) - would you take him back??\n\nn e way,\ngood luck.
616211
Ooh...what a mess! Ok, first, should have waited a little longer to cohabitate. Now that makes it hard on you, your boyfriend and your son. All things in due time, my dear. Next, I do have some good news here...you'll probably always love your son's father in some small way because he shared with you an experience no one else has, which is creating your child together. This will change with more time, though I can't say if your feelings for your boyfriend will change. I loved my ex dearly but he wasn't in love with me. He accidentally got me pregnant and we both decided it was for the best for me to have an abortion. We're still great friends ever since we broke up, but that will always tie us together, even though no one else knows what truly bonded us. It took me time but I didn't move on until I was really ready and it sounds like you did. You're also really young and you already have a child so a lot of this could stem from those early 20's feelings of newfound independence and sowing wild oats. Only you can decide. Take some time for yourself and figure out what it is you really want. Once you clear your head, you might realize you do love this man, or you might soundly be able to declare to yourself that you don't. Remember that love takes time to build and establish, and you haven't been with this new guy for too terribly long. Whatever you decide, best of luck to you.
246732
Depends if this guy is living with his "baby's mama". If he is then I hate to say it but your the woman on the side. If he is not with this woman then ask him what your relationship is and if there is any future.  You said you "had" a man so I take it your single now. If it goes nowhere with him then move on and find someone with less drama in there life.
200408
Tough! You had the child, you have responsibilities! If you new girlfriend isn't interested in your children then she isn't worth bothering about.  What happens in the future if you two were to settle, marry, have kids? Drop it in the conversation casually - yeah, this is my second kid? Stop the lies before they get too bad. If you are lying to your girlfriend by not telling her the truth about yourself, she can't love you for yourself, just a fake image you created.
82043
I'd assume he's ready to be a dad, ready for that kind of commitment.  I'm guessing she isn't ready for that yet, maybe won't ever be.  I'd guess it was time for this sweet guy to move on, find a relationship with someone new, maybe someone who also wants to be a parent. Men are lucky in that their biological clock isn't as insistent as a woman's.  He might want kids now, but he'll be able to wait until he finds the right person to have them with.
635498
To bad for you....you going to have some mayor problems if you are pregnant...but if you are don't go getting no abortion...you opened your legs now you gotta take the consequence. First you let go of guy #1...tell him its over....and guy #2 who you think you pregnant from..you don't gotta lie to him about anything...if you are pregnant..he needs to take care of you and your baby...He's not Innocent either..he had part of it... to bad for his girlfriend.. Not saying yah gotta get married and all that but at least let him be part of it...
318788
Just to be on the safe side and to make sure it is yours. Have the baby tested. If it is yours then step up to the plate and be a father. That would be the right thing to do. You may just be telling you that its yours, She may not even know whos it is.
134250
Be their for her! I got pregnant at 15, and basically all my friends bailed on me. She has got to tell her mother cause she will eventually find out, and I'll bet she would rather hear it from her that from somewhere else.plus she HAS to get prenatal care if she wants a healthy baby. her mom will probably be disappointed but parents tend to roll with the punches. she'll get over the hurt and anger and it will be OK. as for her BF If he's an asshole like that than she don't need him anyway. You can be a perfectly good single parent just make sure she files for child support.\nIn a weird way all babies are blessings. I don't know where I would be today if I didn't have my son. but from now on tell her to wrap it up even though she is already pregnant she can still catch a disease.
197697
Be brave and ask her for a bite to eat or a coffee break.A quiet moment is on your side.It will prove she is for you or not.Take your time and do not hurry.Some women like to flirt around and they  may not serious about men.You never know until you confront her in a quiet setting.If plan A is working then inject Plan B.please post your news.I feel munch better already.
159642
He never mentioned it to you even when you have been going out for five weeks with him. Did he tell you himself, or did you just had a chance to find out ? If he told you himself, probably he was scared that you would get to know or probably like you said he didnt want to lose you. If you found out by yourself, then he has other things he may not be telling you, like the baby's mother ? legal implications ? his commitments ? Either way, lets give him a benefit of doubt that....probably he does love u a lot and worried of losing you, but he cannot hide issues serious as this from you. It is better you confront him now and ask him all issues related to the baby, and any other facts that you should be knowing. I feel he would open up and tell you everything if he is sincere to you. And when he does that, I think he should be given a chance. Everyone goes through some issues in life or the other. Probably things didnt work out for him, and now he has you, so give him a chance..and accept him the way he is, ofcourse only after your heart tells you that once you know the issues yourself. But if he turns out to be a big bundle of lies..then you know what to do !!\n\ngood luck !
395915
If i was u i would be happy that i did that because u saved her from getting pregnant and getting aids from him.If you know you did good then you did good.  she will come  back to you and thank you. so just give it time. It might take like a month or so.  I hope that everything is going to work between you and your friend.
51330
I'm not sure who is more gullible, you or your girlfriend.  Does she really believe having sex with her not-quite-ex-husband will help her gain custody?  Do YOU really believe that is all there is to it?  I know guys will say a lot of things to convince a woman to have sex, but I haven't heard that line before.
78789
no obortion thats for one tell her to have her baby you never know when you are leaving. a baby would leave your essence and it would be the more mature thing to do. there are all types of places to help you raise your baby. take his ass to child support court take his money women have been able to raise kids on there own for the longest and this is coming from a man so its true to talk more \n\nroosie60000@yahoo.com have a lot of fun encouraging her through her pregnancy ok much love from yours truly roosie
560414
You need to be honest with yourself. \n\nIs she pregnant or not? She could be tricking you into leaving your girlfriend to come back to her!\n\nEnsure that she is pregnant before making a decision! If she is then stick by her in any means possible - be honest with your current girlfriend and see who you feel the most comfortable with.\n\nJust because a girl is pregnant with your baby does not mean that you have to get married! As she is only 16!\n\nGood Luck!
44007
It's been my experience that people will do what they want to, no matter what you tell them. They think they have all the answers they need and know what's best for them. Even if you had lots of experience in this area, they'll still do what they want. Many will actually get angry with you for trying to stop their "happiness". I would just let her know that you love her and only want what's best, but you will back off and let her choose her own path, even if it means pain & rejection of her boyfriend. Let her know that you'll always be there for her if she needs a shoulder or an ear to listen. Leave the door of friendship open, because she's gonna need it. This is a train wreck, waiting to happen. You know it. I know it. Been there, done that...it bites! Sounds like she wants to get pregnant. I know a few young gals like her. They think having a baby will solve all their problems and make their fella stay with them forever. It often drives them away, leaving the gal with a baby and more problems that she's not ready to handle yet. It's a long downward spiral. You are a good friend. You see what could happen and you're trying to save her from herself. You can't. If you push too much, she'll just cut you out of her life, slamming the door of friendship in your face, with no way out for her when her world falls apart. And actually, birth control & condoms aren't 100%, as I'm sure you know. I have a 22 year old girl because of failed birth control. Unfortunately, I think you're just going to have to allow her the opportunity for experience to be her teacher. Just be there for her. <*)))><