Hi, did you ever feel like you were drowning because you were giving too much of yourself and getting nothing back in return?  How did you deal with it?
208087
I am currently dealing with the same situation. I have found that by giving to much you leave nothing for yourself. People will use you if you allow yourself to be used. My problems are mostly from family. I have come to the realization that if i wouldnt let a stranger treat me poorly why should i allow my family to do the same. Eight months ago i made a list of toxic people in my life and have started the ellimination process. It is very hard, i wont kid you. But, It has to be done. You are already to considerate or you wouldnt have such a question in the first place. Write a list of people that make you feel this way and next to each name write the pros and cons of your relationship with them. Evaluate and treat accordingly. Your life is to precious and short and you deserve better. We as a society have been taught to give but we have never been taught to receive graciuosly. We dont know how to accept compliments. Writing off friends and family is very difficult but you are allowed to feel good any time you want without regret or remorse. Its more exhausting being nice than being honest and straight forward. As with any change you have to do it slowly. You will feel very bad for a time but keep your long term goal in sight and do not share your plan with anyone or they may try to convince you not to write someone off. You have to allow yourslef to be at peace with your decisions. It will be the loss of a friend or family , like a death. You must go through the mourning process. Be good to your soul and it will reward you. Stay focused and you will allow you to reward yourself with a healthy life full of wonderful people. Good luck to you and yours.\n\n\nJoe
468021
That has happened to me before. With my ex-boyfriend. And boy did i learn from that mistake. Sometimes we can't ask others for advice on these things. We just have to live it through and learn from it. If you've got some friends who will help you pick you up when you fall down then you'll probably recover eventually. I know i did.
96168
I have almost the same problem,, and I know that even sometimes I help people so much and NEVER get something back,, most of the time i do not feel good! what I am doing now is I do say YES only to the people who deserve it,, my friends, family ,... people who really care for me,, try it step by step,, and keep in your mind,, NO BODY CARE FOR YOU AS MUCH AS YOU CARE FOR YOURSELF,, so put yourself first and all the others second,,
675558
Too often people feel a sense of entitlement that doesn't match their real income.  Don't let TV, magazines, and free spending friends lead you into buying things you don't really need.\nYou have to cut back expenses, and start to chose the less costly way of doing things.  Instead of eating out, take a sandwich to work.  Instead of buying new clothes, check out the bargains in a consignment shop.  \nThink of it as a "money diet."  Make a game out of finding ways to cut back.  Get the whole family involved.\nCheck out some books from the public library on getting out of debt and managing your money.  The library card is free!  Try titles like Overcoming Overspending or The Complete Cheapskate.\nCheck out some thrifty tips on the internet too:\nhttp://www.cheapskatemonthly.com/\nFind others by putting in keywords like thrifty, frugal, get out of debt, etc.\nPay off your credit cards or the interest will eat you alive.\nGood luck with your effort to control the spending.  It feels very comforting when you have money in reserve so every thing is not a crisis anymore.
617153
I think you did the right thing to help - I would try and help as much as poss. I hope someone would help me if I needed them (not that I would be in such a state) but there are all sorts of other reasons you might need help from strangers - maybe you feel ill or something.  I don't think people help too much because they are scared of getting involved or implicated in something they are not part of.
167825
Stop feeling sorry for yourself and start taking care of yourself. Why should anyone have to help you when you can help yourself? \n\nWAKE UP and take a look around you! Life can be very unkind, and unless you hit back and make the most of it (without depending on the help of others) you are going to be stuck in a "miserable" life.
381083
You are already doing too much. Dont take more pressure and burden on your mind and body.
44347
I spent the summer working on a yacht in the South of France years ago. I was going out with a girl on the next yacht. We had a great summer.\nAt the end of the season I went to visit her in the UK & found out that her family were loaded.\nWe lasted another couple of weeks. Maybe I felt out of my depth, dunno. Just didn't want to stay with her.\nWhen you find true love it will punch you in the stomach & squirt Mace in your eyes. It will not matter whether they're rich or poor. I wish my wife was rich, but she's not. I still would not swap her for the most beautiful, rich woman in the world.
205992
I'm actually having that same problem. In my case, yeah, I made a mistake, but I fessed up to it, was honest about it, and tried to apologize for it. I still feel like the other person is trying to make me feel guilty, and I refuse to be around people who are always negative all the time. I thought that I liked people like that, and maybe I did once, but now it just brings me down. I want to feel better, not feel how alone I am, and how much the world sucks. That's my story.
101782
Why are you feeling sorry for you self girl?. You need to get active in stuff. Voluntary at a hospital, help feed the homeless, become a big sister. Make someone else the center of the universe and not your self. Truthfully your question is lifeless. I hope you are okay.
360278
alright, your going to have to trust me that i am telling you the truth. i have been down that road as well. i actually didnt have to willpower that you do, i almost did end my life because i couldnt take all the pressure coming from every different angle. the only thing that helped pull me back up was takin a week off from college, goin home and being around family and friends, more so friends than anything since they can make you laugh. if you get to the point where it doesnt seem like there is anything to live for, contact me, i will change you mind. i have helped many people after i went through it.
553185
I totally understand how you feel. I used to work out 5-6 times a week and was a size 6/8, but then I went travelling and ended up having a 2 year break. I ballooned in this time coz I was still eating the same abouts of food I was when I was working out all the time. I got really depressed about it all and hated seeing myself in the mirror. I decided it was time to go back to the gym, so found a great one (very expensive) and thought that was it - I was sorted...well I was wrong! I went to the gym once or twice, but found it really hard to deal with not being as fit/toned/small as I used to be that I just didnt go....of course that made me feel even worst, coz I was now feeling guilty for not going when I had the membership. \nAfter about 2 months of paying for this very expensive membership and not having been more than twice, I got a call from the gym saying they would like to help me with a 'refocus' session. So I went (and again, it was very hard to get there, but I made myself coz I had made the appointment) and got a new programme for a personal trainer. I explained my situation and so she made the programme very basic, so I wouldnt be intimidated by it. Im now going to the gym 3 times a week and being good to myself - realising it will take time to get back to where I was 2yrs ago, but I WILL get back there if I keep going to the gym. My mind set is now much more positive and I like working out again, even though its still very hard!\nI think you just have to push past the barriers you have that are keeping you from exercise. Talk to yourself and remember how good you feel when you do it and remember how lousy you feel when you dont!\n\nI hope this has helped - you're not the only one! Go for it and good luck!!
167461
Funny you should ask because I saw an old flame of mine and got so nervous I spilled my juice all over the lady behind me and knoced over her lunch tray. ( I was trying to avoid him )lol So don't feel bad I make an ass outta my self daily!! Lucky I found A man that sees me for me!
226660
It's was a really hard time to get through...i know about the suicide because i once had my own death planned...I am know stable and would love to help you...when you feel the way i've felt you feel like the whole world has turned agianst you and that no one cares or wants to understand what's going on with you...i can say that even though i was in a christian i felt like my own parents didn't want me...what got me through is the fact that there is one person worth living for...ME! if i took my own life  i wouldn't be only hurting myself i would start a chain reaction across the nation starting with my friends and their friends and so forth...so i choose to live my life for me and do what i want and fulfill my dreams! so tell your clients there are are people that care and there are people like them out here...i've been there done that...there's no point of ending your own life with the effects it will do in the whole sceem of things...
166187
You know, I'm myself have done this a time or two now that you've made me think about it.  Its wrong and I should stop doing it. I just get so frusterated as people ignorance sometimes that it leaks out.  I'll try to be more aware of it.  Thank you for your question, its made me think about myself and how I can be a better person.  \n\n*hugs*
19532
Yes. And for me, I have replaced it with selfishness, it makes me feel great, and doesn't ask for cash, guilt, service, faith, or loyalty. \n\nIf that doesn't work for you, try TV.
388090
You are making yourself sick.  Stop letting other people get to you.  I had to develop an "I don't give a f***" attitude and I felt the weight of the world lifted off my shoulders.  Stop explaining yourself to people too.