my sister-in and husband got in a disagreement and my sister took my sister in laws side which the whole disagreement was so small and dumb anyway, My sister than called me and said she didn't want me in her wedding but like me to come. which I'm so upset I don't even want to show.  My sister and I have been very close our whole lives not having a mother, I was oldest and felt like mom to her even. w2hat should I do we made up but I am still not in the Sept. wedding.
211120
Time to go Hillbilly crazy with an axe handle. I'd go bust up her double-wide if I were you
344774
Perhaps she should have been more honest with you about the first husband.  BUT, remember, she may still have pain and heartache about it.  Did he pass away, was circumstances so that they couldn't stay together, did something really bad happene to him or did he do something.  The hurt and pain could still be so unbearable that she can't discuss it.  don't be so cruel and judgemental.  She's your mom.
15360
This is her special day, and she wants you to be a part of it. The Hostess is a big role! There could be a number of reasons why you were not asked to be a part of the wedding party (Bridesmaid/maid-of-honor). It is only right for family to be chosen BEFORE friends. Some brides go against that, but truly, that is the proper way to handle choosing your wedding party. Don't take offense.\n\nYou should not confront her. If you are that upset about not being chosen to be in the wedding party, you can always decline being her hostess and just go as a regular guest. No matter what, the fact that she thought of you to have a role in the wedding shows she thought of you. Nothing starts up comotion like having to choose your wedding party. Your friend needs your support, ESPECIALLY DURING THIS CRAZY AND HECTIC TIME!
458254
I am not a only child but I am the youngest. I am 45 years old and never wanted children as you don't. I love kids alot, but just didn't ever want to have any. I have lost both of my parents, my Mom just recently. My parents had grandchildren from my other siblings, but my nieces and nephews treated my Mom like a piece of you know what. My Mom was glad I never had children thank goodness. Sometimes I would ask my Mom what I will do when I get old and have no one to come and see me or help me in any sort of way. My Mom had the best answer that could have been given. She said, just because someone has kids, doesn't mean any of them will help take care of you or come to see you. That is so true. I took care of my Mom for the last nearly 6 years of her life and my brother and sister-in-law only came by our house to see us about once every 3 months. Sometimes it was longer than that. My sister never came around unless she wanted something. Just tell your Mom that you and your husband both agreed before marriage that neither one of you wanted children. It is best to just tell her and get it over with. She may be hurt or angry, but it will pass. It is your life with your husband and your husband is your family. Do not under any circumstances have a child you don't want in the first place just to please your Mom or anyone else. It would make things alot worse on you and your husband. Plus it wouldn't be fair to the child either. I also knew at a very early age that I didn't want children. I love kids, but I want the ones I can keep for a while and send back home to their own parents. LOL  Just tell your Mom and get it over with. Get the burden off of your shoulders and you will feel better. Good luck.
555786
This is a common thing, as an ex Bridal Consultant in Beverly Hills many mothers get carried away.  They start thinking about how they are going to impress their family friends. My advise is to Sit her down and softly say, Mom it is my day.  A very special day.  What I would like is............  \nMake sure she realizes you appreciate her help, but it is YOUR wedding.
472680
"meaner than a snake." That's funny! I sympathize with your situation.  I sure wouldn't want to go there. What's the worst thing that could happen if you take a strong stance with your husband and tell him that you don't want to go this year?  Why not invite the old coot to your home? Or just skip going to the relatives this year and celebrate the holidays with your husband and children.\nAlso, I would have a problem with a mother-in-law who doesn't have anything nice to say about you or your son and the fact that your husband let's her get away with that nastyness. You don't deserve to be treated like that.
633755
That is really rough.  If your sister-in-law has been a friend for 10 years, start with her.  Ask her out to dinner, just the two of you, and really lay it on the line and ask what it is that has changed so much between the two of you.  \n\nI can't imagine what could have happened to make the mother-in-law so angry as to say you weren't welcome to a funeral of someone in the family.  \n\nDistance yourself emotionally as much as possible.  Try to get some answers from the sister-in-law.  Remember that you are married to your husband, not the in-law's.\n\nGood Luck
232606
I'm personally all for eloping, but in your case, it seems it might cause more problems than solutions.\n\nYou and your fiance need to have a clear plan established for how you are going to handle his controlling mother.  If he feels 'loyalties' to her now, he will when you are married.  And in-laws can be a great source of tension in new marriages.\n\nHow much would it really bother your parents if you eloped?  Mine know I plan to do that, and it still hurts them a bit that they won't be there.  Make sure you won't be hurting them outwardly.\n\nHow about a compromise, go to the courthouse with your immediate family members and get married.  Then in Sept you can hold a celebration party.\n\nGood luck.
97785
It happened to me. My husband and my sister no less.  It ruined my marriage, even after 28 years I haven't forgiven him.  He ended up with a terminal illness- Multiple Sclerosis for 15 years. He passed away in 2004. I felt like I had to stay and help him.  His actions affected my relationship with my older son and my sister...not that she was worth a second chance. But, I did try.  My mother, father, and baby sister didn't talk to me for 15 years- yea, like it was my fault. My brother and I remained estranged until he passed away. All I did was stay with the guy.  Big mistake! My younger son is not really part of the family every one shuns him because he looks like my husband. My sister's daughter ended up being an outcast and tried to commit suicide twice. What should you do?  Move on...make a life for yourself, find someone that respects you and loves you for who you are now... don't wait it will only hurt you! I am 53 back in college and making a life for myself for the first time. I have never been happier. I plan on traveling and staying alive! With as much enthusiasum as possible..If you need to have someone beside you I am sure that there will be that certain someone around the corner.  For myself, I just love being myself. One day maybe I'll meet someone but, for now my happiness and peace of mind it what counts to me.
216899
She is just feeling protective over her mother role.  She is their momma and she doesn't want you to try and fill her shoes or play mommy.  It is very delicate.  No matter what she did in her marriage doesn't matter.  Please be respectful not to push her about being around HER kids.  Respect the fact that she doesn't want you around them right now.  They shouldn't see you two together unless it is very serious.  I didn't introduce my daughter to her now step-dad until I was sure we were going to stay together.  They don't need to see different women in daddy's life.  You don't know how long you two will last just yet.  Give it time!!!!Don't tell her to back off or anything like that, you have no right to.  If you care at all about your b/f respect her wishes!!!  She'll come around if you do.  Don't make it worse, it is a delicate situation!!!  Why would you move in?  This isn't something that should be taken lightly.  Are you even engaged to him?  Like I said, the kids shouldn't see women in daddy's life unless it is serious enough as marriage is!  Sounds like you know you'll disrespect her wishes anyway!  Why ask then, if you are moving in?
675052
this is YOUR wedding not theirs. tell them how you feel, calmly with out being forceful about it. let them know your feelings are being hurt because they are controling what is supose to be YOUR day.
321810
Yes you did over react a little but I'm sure it's all those hormons flying around.  hehehe  I'm glad you apologized to your stepmom because she is doing her best for you and is looing out for the family.  She probably needs a little help and is trying to help make Tracy feel like part of your family & you can get to know her better if she's around.  I was afraid you were going to say she had un-invited her which would have given you a reason to blow-up, since you had already invited her.  Your step mom sounds like a nice & caring person.  She is doing this for you & for your baby.  Let her know you appreciate everything she is doing for you & that you are happy she is there for you as well.  Be happy that you like Tracy & that she's coming over to help, get to know her...you never know, she might be your future sister-in-law!!!  CONGRATULATIONS!  Good luck in the party & God bless.  ;o)\n\n~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\n\nFree helpful Baby Magazines for a new Mommy-to-be:\n\nhttp://www.americanbaby.com\nhttps://subs.timeinc.net/BY/by_newbiz03.jhtml;jsessionid=Q43OUZOPQV4ROQHMGARRHOQ?experience_id=119170&source_id=30&_requestid=222655\nhttp://www.verybestbaby.com/user/regp00pa.asp?OPTI=RI&offername=&Next=%2F
346941
You really need to map it out ....throw a few choices at her then if she doesn't respond in time OH WELL....You have a life and you need to build your own traditions with your own family to, if she can't see that then I know it sounds bad but to bad. We go through this with our families to....so you are not alone. I do not agree with disrespecting her but I also do not agree with her selfishness! Go see both and do what works for you and your hubby! Happy Turkey Day!\n\nAwwww...and tell your hubby this was her coice not his fault and not to be upset!
338899
My mother in law didnt like me either. She said it wouldnt last a year. Well its been 32 years and we no longer speak to her because she pulled some rel nasty stunts on our children. I say stay with him and ditch the mother in law too.
137407
Maybe you should both go to a coulselor and put the wedding on hold. That's what I would do. No need to rush into a wedding if you cannot get along.
101160
I had a situation where I'd chosen someone as my bridesmaid who was a close friend of my husband's and was also dating my brother at the time.  During the course of the engagement she went nuts and ran off to Australia and screwed over both of my men.  Needless to say she was out of the wedding, and had she not run off I would've asked her to not be in the wedding anyways.  \n\nAs for you, I would just tell her that it seems she's too busy to be able to meet your deadlines and requests, and also with the status of her relationship with you and your family changing you think it's better off she not be in the wedding party, but that you'd love to still have her as a guest.
557971
ohhhhhhhhh. I hate know-it-all-inlaws. I have a sister in law like that and a mother in law that butts in and makes me feel stupid.\nThe only thing you can do is smile and endure. Pretend like you dont hear them or something.