Back in February, I saw an ad in the paper for a room for rent. It was $300 a month, which I still think is too much. Well, since the last two months, he has had many family members move in and they do nothing but lay around all day. No one, not even him, works. I do. I feel so trapped.
213143
Legally, you have a right to free and unobstructed access to your room and each exit from the home.\n\nBeyond this, you should try to negotiate some space allocations.  If this fails, you should move on...
222310
You're very brave.\n\nI have three tenants and the only time that I had kids staying with me, their parents were the hassle.\n\nFor all tenants\n\nSpecify what's included in the rent. \nEmergency numbers must be available\nYour guests - is your tenant and children invited to any function you have, or is it going to be on an event basis\nIf your tenant has guests what are the rules  \nIf your tenant has cash flow problems increase the rent to cover a meal a day, otherwise food can be an issue.\nMarking food in need so that it isn't eaten by someone else.\nBreakage and spoilage rules.\nRules of communal areas you will share. \nCleaning up rules and sharing stuff - the lousy tenants I had threw away cutlery rather than wash it.\nPrivacy - if a door is closed knock before entering\nShared bathrooms rules and standards - no videocams\nIf there are pets how must they be treated.\n\n\nFor the kids\nDiscipline issues - make sure that all the adults agree on the kids limits. All kids try and push the boundries. The deal won't work unless the adults unite against the kids. Any discussions about the raising of the children and any rule changes must happen way from the kids. When the adults have agreed on any deal then all three adults must tell the kids the changed rule.    \nWhat are acceptable punishments and who will apply them. Can you or your husband send a kid to their room until their mother comes home? \n\n\nGeneral points\nTalk often and always. Be lenient and flexible but when you aren't impressed let everyone know it. Apologise if you have done something wrong. Stress politeness, get into the habit of greeting and letting everyone know where you are going. Praise and thank when something is done according to the rules. If someone is grumpy or sulking find out why and have it out. If possible have a daily adult talk session in the first week and then reduce it to once a week or once a month, just to iron out friction.  \n\nIt's a big adaptation for some people to share. I find that mature adults can live together profitably. It is laziness, taking advantage, dishonesty and manipulation that causes hassles.
87157
Hey I'm going through the same thing right now!!!! I have walked out before but it was EXTREMELY HARD to find another job and guess what the one i have now is WORSE!!!!! I hate everyone here to but my problem is that i don't take anyone crap!!!!! I tried to fix a problem i have been having here and it only slapped me in the face, for me i cant just walk out because I'm scared of not finding a job quick enough so i don't fall behind in my bills!!!! I'm trying to stay but I can relate to you.... If you can afford to leave then just walk out if you cant and need this money then stay and look for something else you might have better luck then i did GOOD LUCK hon
325960
I feel you. I think he could have try harder if he wanted to. I know the excuse "i forgot" or I was going to do it relax" and you didnt see shit done. If it is going to be like that I feel you should move out and take a break let him know you are not happy at all and you are under a lot of stress. What will he do without you. He needs to appreciate the things you do as a mother and wife. You need a man not another child you have to take care of. You must feel really lonely and yearning for a man.Take a break and try to relax, go out with friends and take a deep breathe.Try not to overthink yourself cause you will go crazy. I know you have bills to pay but figure out how to get out of this rotation with him cause after awhile it gets pretty tiring. I hope nothing but the best for you and take it one step at a time.
554230
Its totally up to the both of you mike,renting a place IS dead money,you are correct,its a fact--a mortgage though is a millstone around the neck--another fact,so really,you're fecked if you do,you're fecked if you dont,fecked if i know the answer to that one!!Then you have the patter of tiny feet to consider in the future,and everyone knows how costly those little feckers are...very!! Wish you all the best in whatever you decide mike,i know its not easy-decisions,decisions,decisions:-/
486883
Ask your friend for the help in paying for the storage unit but be sure you are the one responsible for paying for the monthly rent. Put it in your name not his. Also pay him back as soon as you can. It sounds like your friend is being supportive of you and he should understand that you may need help until you get back on your feet.
612289
Oh MY GOSH!! That really makes my skin crawl, a son gives his mother his paycheck to pay her bills and SHE ACTUALLY TOOK IT!!! You need to be mad at both of them!!! And you need to remind him that HE has a family to provide for and that even though it is important for him to be there for his mom---THE KIDS AND YOU COME FIRST!! Whats NEXT?? Is he gonna let her come and live with you or will you be moving in with her because you got evicted because of this? Message me if you want to vent...I feel your pain.
619190
When my boyfriend (now my husband) and I first moved out of our parents houses we did have a room mate.  We had a baby and so did she.  It seemed like a good solution to share an apartment.  That lasted for 3 months and we kicked her skanky butt out.  Looking back it wasn't the nicest thing to do but we were so young and just didn't care.  We had our own apartment for several years and I thought we would never get our own house.  Then I got pregnant with our second child and after she was born we moved in with my husbands dad and step mom.  Yuck.  But we saved enough $ to buy our own first little house.  We lived there for 5 years sold it and then moved in with my mom while our new house was being built.  She was great to live with and what an experience.  A dog, two cats, and the five of us including my mom in her little 2 bedroom 1 bath condo.  We have been in our home for 4 years now.  Doing things the way we did taught me alot.  I'll never forget thinking "I will never own a home"  and here we are...it is quite remarkable.  One thing is for sure we were just as happy poor as we are well off and we have got some good poor stories.   :)   \nHope I didn't bore you with too many details...that was fun to reminisce though...thanks!!!
501956
Financial wasn't a big deal really.  We don't fight about that.  What we fight about is that he is a total slob and I'm constantly picking up his shi* off the floor.....it makes me absolutely crazy.  He stinks up the bathroom.....he releases gas from every orifice....ugh!  it's just gross!  Had I known he would get "that" comfortable, I probably would have reconsidered everything.
521793
Hello black orchid.. :)\n\nI do live a very humble lifestyle..\n\nI receive only $705.00 a month, my rent is $675.00 a month, I pay the electric and phone, yet the Lord still provides to me enough  give to others in need.. :)\n\nWhen you figure out the above math..I should not even have enough to pay my bills..but miracles happen and every month and my bills are met.. :)\n\nGreat Question..10 thumbs up.. :)\n\nIn Jesus Most Precious Name..\nWith Love..In Christ.. :)
531647
Feel for you bud. About the only thing you can do is find yourself a hotel/motel room and sue your landlord for those costs as well as your paid rent. May take you a couple of weeks and then the landlord has 30 days to appeal but if you can prove what you say, they will be responsible.
276882
why are you living there in the first place???\n\nsounds like you have a problem.\n\nfirst, you should be grateful to them for giving you a place to live.\n\nsecond, you should get your stuff and try to find a relative or family member you can stay with.\n\nthird, eat crow and apologize to his family and ask for their forgiveness, if you were being a brat at THEIR house.\n\ntake care
388562
My husband had cancer, lost his job and was hospitalized 200 miles away from home to have surgery for the cancer at a major University hospital. I wanted to be with him while he was there but did not have the money to stay in a hotel for that long. I slept in my car in the parking garage for about 3 weeks. the nurses at the hospital let me shower late at night in the patients shower area. At the time I had a 1987 Camaro- small car! Not to mention that cars are going around parking all night and it was pretty cold.  When the wife of my husbands new roomate found out that I had been sleeping in my car, she offered me her hotel room, showers, meals, etc. that night in the hotel was one of the best sleeping nights that I ever had. This woman did not know me at all. We had only talked for a few minutes but she offered all of this to me. Sadly her husband passed away. My husband beat the odds. We made friends with plenty of nurses at the hospital and left our number in case someone is there with a similar situation. When they call and we are able, we send the money to pay for a night in a hotel for them. That woman truely made a huge impact on my life.
186918
I am/was in your situation. Get a job, take some classes, get a hobby. You need to make this place your home also, so get involved in groups around that area and make some friends!
10328
It is a very tough situation. And sadly there are no easy answers. I'd would at least try to speak with your children on the phone and see how they are doing.\nTry not to be too picky with work, and if you do get a job try and get at least a used car; yeah I know about used cars but if you are in a tight situation including $$$$$ then you should go with what you can afford. \nIn regards to living samething start small and then work your way up, rent or room-mate with someone for the time being.
34562
If you're really frustrated living there, I would look into a different living situation, if financially possible.  Maybe live with friends/roommates if money's an issue. (That seems to be the main reason most ppl live with family.)\n\nBut while you're still there, work on communication with them.  Suggest a time when you guys can talk, and tell them about your concerns.  Using the "I" language helps reduce defensive behavior.  So, instead of saying "You never listen to me", try saying "I feel I'm not being listened to".  The first version can come out sounding accusatory, whether you mean it or not.  They'll hear the second version as you communicating your feelings.  \n\nGood luck!
29838
I had the same problem with a guy that moved in with me. I wanted him to pay some rent to me, along with half utilities and groceries. It seemed only fair since with my school and work schedule he was there more than I was. He always complained and still does afterwards about how he paid part of my mortgage, but seriously, had he lived anywhere else he would have had to pay rent too. We ended up breaking up about a year later for various reasons, but the one thing I was definitely happy I did was to make him pay his way. Honestly, you should really look at it as a roommate situation and not a girlfriend situation. Would you let one of your friends live with you for free? Or even a complete stranger, which happens many times if you're looking for a roommate in a new city? Although I know my boyfriend at the time was a little resentful that I asked him to pay some rent to me, I'm glad I did. So yeah, I would talk to her and work out a reasonable payment she could make to you for rent, then still charge her for utilities. A good way to do it is to sit down and determine what kind of an income she will have and talk about a reasonable number that she will be able to afford without hating you later. As for her parents, they need to stay out of it. If they want their little girl to live somewhere for free, tell them to open up their basement to her. Shes a big girl, in or out of college, and it is about time they let her do her thing. And since it is your condo, they have absolutely no say in how much you charge her or for that matter any thing about your finances. Anyway, I hope you work it out. Good luck!