My friend and I have always been somewhat flirtatious with each other, but it never seemed like anything was really going to happen with it. We hooked up about a month ago (St. Patricks Day), and after that things were a little wierd. We're okay now, back to being close friends, but he and I both know that I have feelings for him. I'm not sure if he feels the same way, so how do I get myself to settle for being friends? Should I keep trying?
217169
girl i've been there and done that. I think the best thing is to just let him talk to you. If he already knows how you feel then i would just let it go for now.  If its meant to be then it will be
367776
I can sympathize because I fell for an amazing guy friend. The single caveat? He's got a girl friend. Since you guy is free then I would go for it. Touch his arm, try subtle flirting (should work b/c he knows you well enough to know that it's not the usual banter), if that doesn't get a response do the usual flirting routine, wear attractive clothes, a nice perfume, let him see that your into him. DO NOT DO anything different b/c you like him, like don't start acting like a ditz or all lalala bc guys get freaked out if ppl they have relied on start acting strange. Spend time with him alone and see how it goes.
98424
I know when Ive been kissed and felt NOTHING then I never went any further with this person.  I liked being his friend but there were NO sparks there at all.  Maybe its just the way he kissed you.  U did say you felt something when you hold his hand so take charge of the kiss.  KISS HIM dont wait for him to kiss you.  Give this kiss YOUR ALL!  Put your heart and soul into it and if there is still no spark- Id say move on until u find that special magic-that spark with another guy!!!!  Life is way too short to settle for a relationship without spark!  Good luck to u!
552100
Well, this seems to be a tricky situation. I have been in a similar, yet not so intimate situation, with another friend. Now let me tell you what I did to solve the situation. This answer may give you an idea as to what your next step should be. \nI didn't feel the same way because I thought it was forced. I love my friend in lots of ways but when it feels forced then it is hard to get past the idea that we are not friends. At that time I felt uncomfortable. He likes me still. But I told him that we could just be friends. Now we are still friends and we're glad for it. Sometimes the timing may not be right or she feels it is forced. At this moment cherish the fact that you guys are friends. When the time feels right she will automatically open up to you. At that time, it will not feel forced and you will not have lost a good friend. Remember people feel uncomfortable and forced in many different ways.\nSee, differences between individuals are evident in any relationship, but it is how one handles those differences within the relationship that matters. Are you willing to lose a good friend over your desire for it to be more than that? Decision is up to you.
494568
Oh tough one. No wonder you are in a state of confusion.  If he is a close friend of yours anyway have you thought about suggesting outings and activities that are just for the 2 of you rather than with a group of friends. Spending more time alone with him should help you to gauge how he feels. He could be feeling exactly the same as you are and equally scared to say anything. Be patient. If you are meant to be together it will happen in the end but don't expect him to pick up on hints. In my experience men are remarkable dim in that department.\n\nGood luck.
528056
that's kinda tough.. you need to decide wether you want to stay friends or take it to the next step. If anything happens between you two in the future your friendship will be over. Is that what you want? just think how long you two have been friends, do you really wanna give all that up? Just think about it before you make a move. biggest thing would be to be honest with each other.
12179
I would get a mutual friend to ask around a bit discreetly. Just get them to say something like, "hey have you ever thought about being more than just friends with so and so" and see what he says. Then based off of that you will know how to act around them. Friendships to relationships are always a very hard transition.
461647
Celebrate your friendship.  In time you will find someone that makes your heart pitter-patter, but for now celebrate the fact that there is someone out there you can trust, because that is what is most important in this life.  You need to take him out and tell him that you are "Celebrating Being Friends!!" and really mean it.  He'll think you're kind of strange, but just make sure you go out with a third person that understands what is going on......she doesn't have to be a mutual friend, but at least a friend of yours.  When you're young friendships can last a lifetime, but relationships only a week or just a month.  Go with the flow and remember, perhaps you may not be right for him now, but when he sees you take this like a mature person and then grow from it a little bit.........hmmm, maybe a little later girly girl.  Good luck and relax......Jack
328227
It develops over time.  Often friends do become more.  My advice would be to treat her well, be considerate, take her to nice places, invite her to your place to get a better sense of your personality and lifestyle.  \n\nIn any relationship you must be yourself, because your true colors come out in the end--always.  So, don't try to be something you aren't.  \n\nAlso, I think you must ask yourself the opposite question.  What would make you want to be her boyfriend????\n\nDon't act desperate or crude.  Believe me I have had several guy friends who wanted more and they blew it by being obvious and telling me over and over why I should not be dating the person I was with and why I should date them.  It was flattering at first in a way, but it made me feel icky as well, not to mention it was a nice way of putting me down.  \n\nIt's not how you get her to like you.  Why does she like you now.  Is there hope?  Does she seem interested or totally abliss.  If there is a connection you will know it by how she acts around you, if she feels the same way...If you do not get the same signals, then do not pursue it.  However, if you think there is some chemistry, maybe mention your feelings to her close friend and see what they think.  Also sending flowers for no reason will get the point across.  \n\nRemember too, that it is better to have a friend than to risk losing one to an unsure relationship. Is it worth it??
617401
just ask him...believe me...i've had many guy friends and they all agree on one thing the girls they like the most are the ones that are upfront and honest with their feelings... and that's always the method i chose. And never lost any friendships over it...although i have to say, it may not have been the response i wanted...we still remained good friends, if not better. (and just to keep things clear, when i say friend, i don't mean with benefits...just good cry on the shoulder, tell all your secrets to type)
421983
WOW! This is CRAZY! I am in the exact, I mean exact same situation! I have a guy friend (best friend at that) and he is a little bit attractive, and I know he is in love with me because he tells me so, but I do not have romantic feelings towards him. Sometimes I get the urge to let things go further (physically) but in the long run, I never let it get that far. I believe, if something is mentally stopping you from going further with him, then you should listen to your gut feeling. It might also make things complicated after you initially sleep together. He'll be calling you all the time, crying about his love for you and whatnot, and you will have to tell him (once again) that you don't have feelings for him. Trust me, this is what happened when I slipped up and accidentally kissed my guy friend....but either/or, GOOD LUCK!!!
356499
Maybe the chemistry is not right?  Maybe this guy whom you thought you might like is really not for you?\n\nOr maybe he comes on too strong by planning what you two will do for the next month.\n\nFrom what you write, he seems like a nice guy - but if the chemistry is not there for you, then you should tell him that you don't feel the same way towards him as he does towards you so hopefully he will be your friend.\n\nGood Luck!
273908
He has asked you, you like him. Honestly what is the problem. Go for it. This is your chance to find out how he feels about you. Don't blow it by thinking about it too much. Even if at the end of the night if he only wants to be friends all that matters is that you had a great night with good company that you can look back on it with a smile. Would that be so bad.
80162
Let me tell you this. its all up to you. It's either he likes you back or he doesn't. I've been in your exact situation before. I'm female and I developed feelings for my best friend who's also a girl. one day, we were just chatting about normal stuff and i basically blurted out to her that i had feelings for her. she told me that what she felt for me was totally platonic and she didn't think of me any other way. Honestly, it killed me for a while. However, today, the relationship that the two of us have is even closer than the one we had before i told her. We didn't have any sort of awkwardness between the two of us. The only shitty thing is that I still feel for her and although I make it seem like I don't feel for her anymore, inside, I just wanna kiss her everytime she opens her mouth to speak. But I have to say that I was really lucky cuz its really rare that two people can overlook the fact that one person feels more for the other than usual. The funniest thing is that til today, my confession is still discussed between the two of us. Recently, I just asked her if it was the right thing to tell her about it in the first place. And, according to her, my confession saved our friendship. Cuz she had already suspected, but she was in denial about it, seeing that i was her best friend and all. But if i had not told her anything, she'd feel weird and eventually take a step back from the friendship.\n\nSo, whatever you do, just follow what your heart tells you to do. You could jokingly bring it up as a suggestion if you don't want to take the direct approach. See how he reacts, and if it's positive, just let it slip. Say that, you didn't really expect it to happen but it just did and you felt that you needed to let him know.\n\nGood luck though.
457519
Why not.  You know what you want...go for it.  It's always better to start out as friends.  You already know him and he's comfortable with you.  Just do exactly what you've written.  Strike up the conversation and see where it goes, tell him that you would like to date him and see what happens.  Don't be afraid...if it isn't happening, you still have a friend in him.  Good Luck
278287
From what you say it seems your dilemma is...your head verses your heart... the head is usually right you didn't say why he couldn't commit... but in any case i think you've already conceded that fact. My advice would be to make a clean break... continuing to be friends is just keeping your hope alive... I say continue on with your life meet someone new... yes it is completely possible  and likely that you will fall in love with someone else... which ends your dilemma...good luck in whatever you choose to do
28217
Tell him that you like him but you're getting mixed signals and you need for him to tell you how he feels.  I know it's scary, but even if he says he just wants to be friends he'll stick with you if he really IS your friend!  Either way, it's best to get things out in the open.  You'll be glad that you know and don't have to just wonder all of the time.