I hate to say it but my ex girlfriend apparently wants to sabotage my relationship with my current girlfriend. She slashed the tires and smashed the windshield of my new girlfriend's car and leaves scary messages on my voicemail. This has been going on for two weeks. I reported her for the vandalism (she denies it, of course) but I might also need a restraining order. What do you think I ought to do?
213538
Wow dude, I had the exact same thing happen to me in college. My ex, psyco biotch girlfriend was one twisted chick. Thank God I ditched her monkey *ss. \n\nMy best advice to you is DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Anything out of the ordinary? Document it. She leaves a creepy message on your machine? Save it and compile it somehow. See her parked otuside your house at 4:00 am? Sneak around with a flash and take her picture. Make sure you get the license plate. If you don't want her to see you, you can set your camera on a long exposure (like 2 hours) to get enough light. You can also use one of those surveillance video cameras that are triggered by motion. They're pretty cheap and easy to install. This will catch her in the act. This way, you can not only get a restraining order but press charges too. \n\nTo get a restraining order (I've had to do this too), go to the courthouse with some cause for it (like her threating to kill you on your voicemail or something like that). Tell the judge your story and say that she is harassing you, damaging private property and making you feel unsafe. The judge will give you a temporary restraining order which forces her to stay away. It will cost about $30 or so to have it served by a police officer. The cop will visit her, and deliver it to her. Now, if she comes within so many feet of you, her monkey *ss can get thrown in jail. This will only work for 15 days, at which point you will need to find a lawyer (believe me this is necessary). You will then go to court, tell the court your story, and the judge will take action. The judge's decision will most certainly depend on the DOCUMENTATION you have been saving up this whole time. Cool?\n\nAs best you can avoid getting into a physical altercation with her. If you really feel threatened. Buy some self defense type stuff like pepper spray. DO NOT DO ANYTHING ILLEGAL, like carrying a concealed weapon. If you get busted she can turn the story around on you. \n\nMake sure your girlfriend is documenting too. Document, dates, events, cost of repair...etc. Also, be sure to call the police each time one of these things happens. They will keep a record of it and when you go to court there's going to be a long list of things stacked against her.\n\nIf the court orders her to cease and desist, she will have to stay away from you and not call for good (or like 5 years or something). If she violates that, she goes to jail for a few years. \n\nWow, I feel for you dude. I've been there, done that. But I did my homework. The police in my neck of the woods have a mongo file on my ex. Good luck to ya. Shoot me an email if you need more advice.
485982
wow she's totally crazy! i think what your doing with the video and the restraining order is right,--you should also carry a video camera with you and videotape anything she personally does to you, also record any phone calls you and your bf receive--- trust me this girl is just waiting for you to slip and either verbally or physically attack her, then your in trouble--so stay calm and do everything strategically--get the evidence and let the law deal with the crazy bitch. you dont need to get you hands dirty with her.
209565
A restraining order can be dissolved only by the court that issued it.  As it is, these things generally expire after 10 days or so, depending on your state's laws.  The hearing which is set at the time a restraining order is first issued is usually one for temporary injunction.  It doesn't sound like your girlfriend is interested in pursuing it any further, but I don't know what your local judge's attitude is likley to be regarding movants who don't show up for court.  The truth is that if the two of you simply appear for court as required and she says you two have patched things up and she doesn't want to pursue the action any further, the court will most likely just drop it.\n\nI'm not sure what "record" you are talking about in your question.  A restraining order is not a criminal order but a civil one.  There's no "record" for it to appear on.
187360
Depends on the situation...where you fighting?  I've accidentally called my ex-bf by my dog's name during a fight.  If it was in bed...i've known people who have done that, and i think the reason for that is because they're just not in the right frame of mind during that time.  Whatever the reason, obviously she wasn't thinking straight.  I don't think it means she wants her ex back.  I don't think she apologized because she was embarrassed/upset and didn't want to make a big deal about it.  If i were you, i'd let it go this time.
636957
An ex girlfriend or another girlfriend? If it's another girlfriend you are two-timing player and it's no small issue. She needs to kick your ass to the curb.
171716
a simple thing to do , YOU are his present SHE is his past, if she regrets things that is her problem he is showing he loves you he tells her hes with you so If she is really getting psychotic try to talk to her if she doesn´t get it then get your boyfriend to get a restrain order.
51330
I'm not sure who is more gullible, you or your girlfriend.  Does she really believe having sex with her not-quite-ex-husband will help her gain custody?  Do YOU really believe that is all there is to it?  I know guys will say a lot of things to convince a woman to have sex, but I haven't heard that line before.
356267
Why are you letting this guy make you crazy?  Why is he the one making all of the decisions?  You're smart, if a girlfriend of yours just told you what you've told us, what would you say to her???  Maybe it's time to move on...
377744
Move on. You should not have to put up with someone like this. They are preying on your emotions. You are in control of your life. You choose whether to be a victim to this behavior. Be smart - stand up for yourself. Move on.
170658
I don't think it would be wrong to exaggerate on this one in order to keep him away.  Have her file a restraining order on him. Just say he hit her or that he threaten to kill her with a gun or knife. My ex-husband was so controlling that after I left him he followed me around.  Even after I changed my phone # he found out what it was some how.  He really did try to stab me, but when I filled my restraining order I added a little extra just to make him pay. Who do you think the judge will believe? Him or her.  All she has to say is she's extremely terrified of him and what he will do to her. The restraining order will cost you about 20 or 30 dollars, but it's a small price to pay to keep a psycho away LEGALLY.
375377
Hm...where'd you mess up with her? I'm not sure I understand what exactly happened. Maybe you came on too strong and she's not ready to have a relationship with anyone just yet. How old are you 2? It's something to consider. It sounded like she wanted to be your friend but you pushed it and pushed it and now she wants to stay away from you. Dunno. That's my guess, though.
554073
The ONLY right thing for you to do is to report it to the police.  She's in a vile situation with a monster, and if she's too afraid of reporting it, then be the best boyfriend that you can be and report it for her.  You can do it anonymously if you want to.
597116
First of all you don't mention your age but one must assume that you are over 18 at least. Is this child from him or from another man? Don't bother with a restraining order because they are only as good a the law enforcement in your town. There have been a number of women killed by boyfriends after they have a restraining order placed. Take No. 2's advise. Get the heck out of Dodge or where ever you live and do it quick. Don't let anyone know where you are that can tell HIM! It is for your safty as well as that of your daughter. The man is a psyciopath and you should make a report to the local police before you leave. It is a crime to threaten someone else with bodily injury. Not to mention that he has said that he will will have your daughter KILLED. At least the law enforcement will be on the look out. Once you have moved away use your mothers maiden name because you can do that legaly. Don't list your phone number either. Just initials and no address. If it were me I'd move to a different state. I would put as much distence between him and me as I could. It may be hard at first but you will be alive and well. If you stay it may take him months to do what he says he is going to do but trust me he will eventually do it and then it will be too late. Men that talk that way usually do so to intimidate, but then they need more power over you and they start to do things physicaly to the people they say they will hurt. Talk to the law or the DA in your town and they may be able to give you more advise. No matter weather you take my advise or theirs PLEASE take your own advise and get out of there. Hope this helps and may God watch over you and your daughter. Be Safe If you need to talk to someone email me at Whilemom47@yahoo.com
263000
This ex girl of yours needs to get a life and take responsability for her actions. SHe's just trying to make you feel guilty.  Stay away from her, avoid her... otherwise she's just going to take you down w/ her. You don't need that. You are who you are.
226304
It's clear that your ex is very jealous or wants to revenge or something like that and wants to brake your relation with your actual girlfriend. The best weapon u have is YOUR GIRLFRIEND. If you really love each other speak all things you re feeling now about the situation and give her an example with the same situation but with the players inverted. If she really loves you she will understand and will stop your ex.
42528
It's the same as everywhere; you or your b/f hurt her, you go to jail unless it's self defense and you'd better be able to prove it. I'm a former police officer and if you attacked her, I would arrest you. What you need to do is to talk to the girl's parents. She sounds obsessive and that can be dangerous. You need to document every offense, possibly video tape her doing it or recording her with a hidden tape recorder, which, in Texas, you can legally do as long as one party in the conversation is aware that it's being taped, i.e. you or your boyfriend talking to her. If she shows up at your home, call the police. If her parents refuse to put a stop to it, go to the school principal if you are all in the same school and if need be, the police but do not lay a hand on her unless she attacks you. Where do you think sympathy might lie in a court of law? With you and your b/f who are older, or what they would consider a child misbehaving? Right or wrong, sympathy will be on her side because of her age. You both have to be the mature ones in this case. Don't try to solve it on your own. Do tell her when you speak to her that you are going to call the police or go to her parents and if that doesn't work, do as I instructed. It's the safesty way for anyone. There is no excuse for violence unless you are protecting yourself or someone else from a physical threat. Good luck.
406742
Why would you think he would hurt her? You must have some evidence based on the relationship the 2 of you had. But keep in mind that, unless he was awful, their relationship could have a completely dynamic than yours did. Tell her your concerns and then let her make up her own mind.