The real truth is im hurting inside... people who self injure arent just attention seeking freaks... i suffer from depression... and a way i deal with myself is cut... but i cant get people to accept me for who i am... the scars scare them away... i dont know what to do anymore... i feel so lost... why are people like this????
200578
I know where you are at. Self injuring is a way to deal with pain and hurt. It seems easier to deal with the physical pain of cutting than the emotional pain of your hurt. This IS normal, but try to find someone to talk to. I used to cut myself when I was younger. I had a tough childhood and some really rocky relationships with boyfriends. Cutting felt good. I am married now. I do not cut anymore or think about hurting myself. I have a beautiful baby girl who is 10months old. I spoke to counselors and friends. You may not think so now, but they can be so benificial to your healing. \nMy husband knows of my past and of my cutting. My scars are a reminder of what USED to be. I was really depressed. At times when I look at my scars, I wish I hadnt have taken that razor and sliced my beautiful skin. But I did. I did what I did. I talked to my friends and family about my pain and they accepted it. Your friends/family will come around. They are acting that way towards you now because they don't understand. HELP them understand. REACH OUT to someone. I have never met you but I can tell you that EVERYONE is beautiful and unique in their own way. YOU are OK! If you have a family physician, try talking to them. TEll them you are feeling depressed. They maybe able to prescribe something for the chemical imbalance. It's NOT YOUR FAULT that you are depressed. A great majority of the world is depressed. And go figure with all the crap thats going on in the world today.\n\nRemember....ITS NOT YOUR FAULT...and you are NOT a freak!\nTake care...it WILL get better...
227491
well differerent people suffer different things. i have not met anyone else who was born with a hole in their heart. I do not let this restrict me. i feel more confident about myself than more people. just because us suffer from something not many people do does not mean you should let that hold you back. Find something you love to do and take time doing that. Dont even think about fishes. \nneed to talk to me just email me.
80210
dude i have the same problem and share your pain. i use to cut myself, but then it seemed so stupid so please dont do that.what really works for me is talking about my problems with my mom,sister,cousin or a really trustful friend, because they dont judge me based on what i say,do or feel.they will try to help you out as much as they can and understand what youre going through and give you advice. you dont need therapy to figure out whats wrong and waste all that $$ when you can talk to someone at home for free :)\nmusic=escape from reality
211354
alot of people are afraid of girls or boys that do this and there is alot of reason people do and the are afraid of what you might do. my daughter was doing this to fit in with friends that was doing it. she would not cut enough to make herself bleed but enough to leave marks and she had alot of things go on to her over it with seeking help and bein watch by everyone around because we all was afraid of her hurting herself and dieing. its hard to deal with things like that because of they might be to afraid of you killing yourself and don't want to deal with it. you really have to look at it as a big part of your life that is going to hurt you and help you. just make sure you let your next boyfriend now. and as far as your ex boyfriend goes he was not good for you anyway. because if he was he would stick with you no matter what. gl hun
453333
I know how u feel..it feel terrible.. u don't have to strave ur-self..what should u do is doing exercise n having healthy food..n buy magazine to learn how to do skin care.. upgrade urself..don't care abt what they said..one day they will regret what they had done.. make them regret n try to make friends with other..i'm sure u can find a true friend one day..good luck~~~
114644
I went through the same thing, it seems to be a semi-popular trend among teenage girls of this current generation. I helped my ex-girlfriend through her teen years, It was very difficult for me to convince her that she shouldn't kill herself. At one point one of her classmates found out she was cutting herself and she went to the mental hospital. There she learned new ways to hurt herself, how to hide it, how to poison herself. She started doing drugs and cutting herself even more, just to prove a point. While in the Mental Hospital she cut "Sl*T" over and over again onto her chest, covering her entire chest. Only by giving up all of my friends, giving up on my own highschool career and spending almost all my time with her, was I able to convince her that there was more in life.\n\nThat was three years ago, about a year ago she started to feel better and better about herself. She got rid of her old friends(who also are cutters, but good people too) and started hanging around with some spoiled preppy kids. She left me to date some rich brat, but I am just happy that I saved her life.\n\nThe problem comes down to the glorification that a sub-culture that exists places on it. There are websites dedicated to the "Beauty" of cutting and anorexia. This is what influenced my Ex to stop eating and start hurting herself. It destroyed my own life, but thats what friends do.\n\nI would say that the best thing you can do is stand by her side, no matter what happens. Try to help her realize that she is simply taking out her anger on herself instead of on the ones that hurt her. You should also try to get her away from that distructive enviorment as much as you can.\n\nI am suprised at how common and Idenical this problem is, girls who have abusive(verbally or otherwise) family members and are depressed seem to think that cutting themselves will help. I understand the ideas behind it, if I do this to myself it makes them even worse of a person for what they did.\n\nIt is a long and difficult path your friend has ahead of her, and if you choose to help her, it will be difficult for you as well. The only thing I can say is, no matter how much she doubts it, things always get better, its just the truth.
539103
i totally sympathise with you and know how you feel...at the age of 14 i was diagnosed with aneroxia, depression and i sef-harmed (i still have some scars now...3 years later)- i was in denial about all these things but then one day i cracked and realised i needed help....i sat down with my parents and explained EVERYTHING....about what i was doing to my body....how i was feeling inside....and how i came close to taking a overdose.....i was referred to a psychiatrist and was admitted in to a psychiatric hospital for 6 months...im not trying to scare you and tell you thats where your going to end up because mine weren't just about the self-harming but what i will say is that you need to sit down with your parents..tell them not to speak because there is something you need to get of your chest and just get them to listen.....as for you saying that your mum was angry when she saw your cuts...it isnt an anger for example....if you damaged someones property....but an anger that is brought on by being worried, scared, feel like they cant help e.t.c...and probably why you never went to them for help...once your parents get an idea (i wont so understand because no one can ever understand unless they are going through it or has been through it) of what your feeling then get them to take the right steps forward to getting you psychiatric help and counselling....but DONT keep this to yourself.....im not saying its a 2 minute job to fix because even after i came out of hospital after being in there for 6 months i carried on self-harming but i still got to see a cousellor and psychiatrist twice a week.....now 3 years later i no longer self-harm but carry the scars with me.....i wish you much luck
269729
I don't know. But if you are cutting yourself at all, you need to tell someone (like a parent or doctor). This isn't "normal behavior", and could signify that you are suffering from a chemical imbalance in the brain that causes depression, among other things. Why do you cut yourself? Do you feel "relief" (from "anxiety, perhaps?)? How do you feel about your life, are you a happy person? Or do you "blame yourself" for lots of things (that are likely not your fault, although you may think otherwise)? Please talk to someone about this. If you are afraid to talk to someone you know, you can call anonymously to a counseling office. You can talk to me.\n-Tera (time4u420@yahoo)
324816
How can hurting yourself be the answer to anything? MY daughter did that for a while because her friends kept bring their problems to her and no teenager can handle another teens problems. I suggest you try to find an adult who can help you or maybe a professional. If you can't afford one they have places that don't cost you anything. I hope you don't cut yourself because you don't really want to hurt yourself I know it's a way of getting the pain out but there are other ways like I said talk to someone who can really help you with your problems, maybe you could talk to God and he can help you through your rough times. I wish you luck with what ever you do.
332164
Let all that pressure and pain out another way. Try to find the courage to tell someone what you are doing. This doesn't have to be an adult. A close friend is good. If you cannot bring yourself to instigate this 'confession', turn the tables. If you are asked, admit it. And be honest to yourself about the reasons why you are doing it. Trust me - it will be a relief and only after admitting it will you be able to find other outlets and a way to mend the pain that is causing you to feel the need to self-mutilate.\n\nA great outlet is acknowledgeing how you feel and sharing this with someone else. Just having someone else understand is a huge release. Also knowing you are not the only one doing this.  And the feeling of being unburdened...\n\nYou are not mad so do not worry about what others might think. Find someone to confide in - it really will help.
125521
I am not a parent of a child that self-harms..but if it is any consilation ..I used to be a child who did the "self-harming" ...if I can be of any help just let me know....
55143
You are not being a baby. Something like that could have left deep scars at any age. Seek professional counseling. If you can't afford it, perhaps Medicaid can. Also, if at all possible try for some group counseling with your parents to help you deal with the issue. \n    Hurt is hurt. It doesn't stop until you deal with it. I am not saying that you forget it, counseling would just help you deal with it better in a more rational and deliberate way.\n    My boys are having to deal with a lot of that same hurt right now so I better than most know where you are coming from. Children from broken homes just want a normal family. They want their life back that their parents stole from them. That is just the child's perspective I know but that's where you are coming from older now or not.\n    I will pray for you and hope that your terrible pain will eventually lessen someday.\n    Remember, hope springs eternal.\n\n                        Regards,\n                        Magicman
163456
It is not understood really how many people actually do this but its thousands and thousands. Don't worry your not daft neither stupid. Dont listen to people that say its for attention!\n\nYoung people who self-harm have often had very difficult or painful experiences or relationships. These may include:\n\nBullying or discrimination. \nLosing someone close to them such as a parent, brother, sister or friend.\nLack of love and affection or neglect by parents or carers. \nPhysical or sexual abuse. \nA serious illness that affects the way they feel about themselves. \nOther young people may start to self-harm as a way of dealing with the problems and pressures of everyday life. Pressure can come from family, school and peer groups to conform or to perform well (for example in getting good exam results). Young people can be made to feel angry, frustrated or bad about themselves if they cannot live up to other people's expectations.\n\nYoung people who self-harm may have low self-esteem. For some this is linked to poor body image, eating disorders, or drug misuse. Understanding why young people self-harm involves knowing as much as possible about their lives and lifestyles.\n\nPeer pressures may occasionally be the most important reason for self-harm.Young people may find themselves among friends or other groups who self-harm and may be encouraged or pressurised to do the same. \n\n\nSelf-harm as a way of coping\n--------------------------------------------------------------------------------\n \nExtreme feelings of fear, anger, guilt, shame, helplessness, self-hatred, unhappiness, depression or despair can build up over time. When these feelings become unbearable, self-harm can be a way of dealing with them.\n\nReasons young people have given for their self-harm include:\n\nWhen the level of emotional pressure becomes too high it acts as a safety valve - a way of relieving the tension. \nCutting makes the blood take away the bad feelings. \nPain makes them feel more alive when they feel numb or dead inside. \nPunishing themselves relieves feelings of shame or guilt. \nWhen it's too difficult to talk to anyone, it's a form of communication about their unhappiness - a way of saying they need help. \nSelf-harm is something they can control when other parts of their life may seem out of control. \n\nFeel free to ask me questions.
625672
Self harm is very common, people do it in all sorts of ways.\n\nIf I was your friend I would want you to tell me about it, so that I had peace of mind that you were safe.  Are you safe?\n\nSelf harm can be done in a safe way, if you cut yourself make sure that what you use is sterile, and is not going to cut you too deeply.  I would much prefer that you didn't cut yourself, and that you spoke to a counsellor.  \n\nI know that this is your way of coping with things, but trust me, hurting yourself is not going to help you in the long run.  All it will do is cause you more problems, more upset and more loneliness.\nTalk about it, get help.\n\nDon't worry about what your friends will say or if they think your weird, because its done now anyway.  This is about you.  Sort yourself out and don't worry about your friends reaction, that should make no difference to how you change your habit.
194310
Sometimes people get so hurt, angry, and frustrated but can't (or aren't allowed to)express their feelings.  Especially kids whose parents are not very understanding or who don't accept emotional expression in the family or adults whose partners don't accept it.  When the person can't express feelings, especially angry ones, they have a build up of frustration and release it on themselves rather than on others.  It's not much different from people who abuse others accept that the self-harmer would probably not hurt anyone, including themselves, if they were allowed to or knew how to express simple feelings of anger, disagreement, or frustration to those around them.  This is why it so important to learn good communication skills and to allow children and other family members to share and express their emotions.  \n\nSo when people hurt themselves, it makes them feel better because they're releasing their pain and anger.  Just like an abuser releases pain and anger when they punch someone else or punch a wall.  Even though their hand might hurt, they feel better because they've released it.  Unfortunatly, hurting others or yourself leaves people feeling guilty afterward.
243063
People call themselves names for several different reasons. Very smart person! There is ALOT of wicked out there, Satan is trying to pull on us every day! People generally do this because of low self esteem, they don't feel any better about themselves, or they do it in front of someone hoping they will tell them different, to get some positive feedback about themselves, that the are truly worthy. If you have a friend like this , they are HIGH maintanence, but DON'T Give UP! Be strong for them if you can! You sound like a caring person and that is just what this person needs, it sounds like this person may have been put down alot in their lives, and this is what is left "after the dust settled". It's sad, but hold tight! YOU may be able to make a difference, point out their GOOD points and why, they may be an injured person, and I am speaking from experience from my heart. You cared enough to write in, God Bless You, you are a caring person, remember that and stick to this person, This made me cry, I am one of those people, I wish I had a friend like you!
649891
whats 'normal' ?if your friend is not doing something to harm their self just be there for them.there probably are plenty of people pointing their crooked little fingers and talking about this person.please don't follow the crowd.let your friend know it bothers you , but you will still remain there friend. (and they are not hurting any1 else....)