I have told my boyfriend 2 help me deal with being bioploar. I have asked him 2 do things 4 me and he says that he isn't going 2 do anything 4 me. He says I am crazy & that the things I think are retarded. I am going through bad things & he says that I shouldn't ask him 2 do things 4 me, because he has 2 be the one 2 put up with me. So one day I go over his house and I am crying and he is looking at me like I am stupid & he tells me stop being a baby! He doesn't even know whats wrong yet. Little did he know I just got in a huge fight with my mom & all I needed was a hug. I told him that if I start crying just hug me & be there for me. All I need is a shoulder and someone 2 listen. He says hes not going 2 do any of that, because its retarded. He says that it stresses him out when I cry & I need 2 leave. Why can't he just hug me? He did before & like 2 minutes after that I was done crying, but now he doesn't want 2 deal with it. I am the one going through a huge problem,why can't he help
217568
he doesnt seem like he deserves you. i ve seen your questions and i say tell him to grow up or get out
492445
Sounds like he's blowing you off. Even if he doesn't think anything is wrong, just the fact that you feel that way should be enough for him to try and make the situation better. If he's not attentive to your feelings and needs, he's being selfish. Give it a little while, and if he's not making an effort, you should start looking for some new endeavors.
314508
Your boyfriends loves you very much.\n\nIf he didn't he wouldn't put up with the way you behave, especially not at the age of 20. There are millions of young girls out there that he could have but he chose YOU. He loves YOU and he only wants to be with YOU.\n\nHe can't show you that every minute of every day because that simply isn't normal. You would probably get fed up with it if he did, you would feel smothered.\n\nYou need to sit and imagine what life would be like without him. How much you would miss him and how much you don't want that. You have to appreciate him and concentrate on the good points of your relationship.\n\nWhen you feel the rage start building, count to ten or walk away. He is much more likely to come after you than if you scream, cry and act crazy. When you do that you are actually making yourself unattractive to him and let's face it, if someone was screaming in your face and acting crazy, you would want to get away from them wouldn't you?\n\nYou are definitely NOT crazy, don't worry. You are very young and your feelings for this boy are obviously very strong. Love can make us do crazy things! Just calm down, take your time and let him have some space sometimes.\n\nYou should also have time away from him to spend with your own friends. If you never leave his side to go do something different how are you ever going to have anything to talk about? You could be telling him funny stories about things you did with your friends and making him laugh and love you even more. It will make you more interesting - it's very easy at your ages to get bored with a relationship. You have to keep it going but make it fun. \n\nHowever, hurting yourself is serious stuff and is usually the product of low self-esteem. Don't be afraid of the doctor - he/she can actually help you. They certainly wouldn't think you are crazy or lock you away. There are thousands of young people with similar issues. One day you will look back and think 'I can't believe that was me'. Unfortunately, it's all part of growing up.\n\nYou have taken the first very big and VERY important step. You are talking about it. Don't be afraid to talk about it. Your feelings are what makes you the person you are, never be afraid to express them (calmly). Please talk to your doctor - you will be surprised how kind and helpful they will be.\n\nTake care x
381971
sounds like he has got a hyper tension dude..... may be it's coz of the relationship too. better speak to him and let him know and get him prepared to meet a counsellor and then arrange it.
148254
get a shrink -really- that isn't being mean spirited in anyway-but chick, if there is "so many things wrong" and your boyfriend "sometimes isn't there" you will end up pushing him away and then he won't be there at all if in the instance that you are acting all manical. Besides you need to figure out who you are and why there are so many things wrong with ya and don't depend on a bf to be there all the time because that is just living in a fantasy world. you will end up putting too much on him than he is able to carry more than likely then your gonna end up crazy and alone. that is what a shrink is for impartial party to unload on and help ya figure things out.
217014
I don't kno how 2 being be here goes. Have u ever considered that these accusations might be a reflection of wat he is doing to u? He might b the 1 that's cheating honey. Or he might jus hve trust issues and u don't want to hve anything 2 do with that, cause u'll always have 2 end up proving ur self to him and this will drive u insane. Stop hurting urself, it does u no good and i jus shows him he can control u. I kno love makes us do crazy things but i doesn't sound like this love is mutual. U are so young and i'm sure u are very beautiful so stop the damage u are doin to ur body no one deserves that. Do me a favour if u are crying now cry and cry and cry but when u stop make sure that's the last drop that u shed. Ur rela.. with this guy wasn't goin anywhere if he could accuse u and hurt u feelings with no regard. Pls go have a nice long bathe when u finish cry, will bubbles and everything. Place some cucumber on those eyes of yours. Or some used tea bags.Make sure its warm water to revonate ur skin. I kno its only 4 days ago but ur health is at stake here. U need a friend some one u can tell face to face to comfort u, u need a hug, i wish i could give u 1. U may not hve an appetite so drink lots of water. If u do want 2 eat, go hve a nice meal. Get out of ur room, and go sit in the park feel the wind on your face take a friend with u, u need some moral support, this is very imp. I kno u may not want 2 go out but i'm deeply concerned about ur physical health. \nPls don't call him this will only depress u more. He's not calling cause he never really cared that much in the first place. I can't stress enough how hard this is and the strenght that it will take 2 overcome this aspect of your life. But u are very strong, 2 be with a man like that and still come out sane. U are beautiful. Ask GOD for the strenght to overcome all this pain that u are in now. Pls don't leave this too long i would like u 2 get better. The longer u leave it the harder it'll be 2 overcome. B strong I kno u are!
530905
Girl tell me about it, my bf of 2 years is here and DONT EVEN WANT TO BE HERE BUT KEEPS PRETENDING THAT HE DOES. And to top it off, he'd rather be with his family who treats him, me and my son fuck*ed up for no reason.  Hes leaving to go there.  He messed it up this year and last year...everytime I say he couldnt possibly make me feel any lower he finds a way to! I dont get it.
664897
He sounds immature.  Ask yourself if you  are better off with him or without him.  Sounds to me like without would be the way to go.\n\nI just ended a 7 year relationship - so don't feel alone in this.  I feel sad at times but am getting my life back together without his head games and am feeling at peace\n\nGood luck
421700
Sounds like you both are trying to work through this. Unfortunately sometimes arguments do occur, the only thing is when the dusts settles what then? I believe that by him not telling you right away that this or that was not exactly what he expected seems he is trying to be tolerant. Where he is trying maybe not to impose on you all the time what he think or how he thinks things should be. But if he bottles it up and then waits to explode letting you have it all at once, you are right he really should tell you then and there. Not bottle it up and make him resent or get so angry.  He has to realize you fess up to things you tell him "Oh I had no idea I was coming across that way" so he has to know you are not intentionally doing things to  irritate him. Keep talking, keep telling him to tell you.  Tell him "Hey let post this or that and have people who don't know you and don't know me, tell us what they think is going on. People who have nothing to gain"  People who do this just because we've all been there and think Hey maybe someone else can benefit from past mistakes.   Good Luck to you and him I really hope it works out for you two.
325960
I feel you. I think he could have try harder if he wanted to. I know the excuse "i forgot" or I was going to do it relax" and you didnt see shit done. If it is going to be like that I feel you should move out and take a break let him know you are not happy at all and you are under a lot of stress. What will he do without you. He needs to appreciate the things you do as a mother and wife. You need a man not another child you have to take care of. You must feel really lonely and yearning for a man.Take a break and try to relax, go out with friends and take a deep breathe.Try not to overthink yourself cause you will go crazy. I know you have bills to pay but figure out how to get out of this rotation with him cause after awhile it gets pretty tiring. I hope nothing but the best for you and take it one step at a time.
505526
IT REALLY SOUND LIKE YOU HAVE ISSUES THAT YOU NEED\nTO ADDRESS ABOUT YOUR SELFESTEEM. IF YOU NEED\nANY ONE TO MAKE YOU FEEL ALIVE AND WORTH IT\nTHAT  MAY BE THE PROBLEM. AND YOU NEED TO TALK\nTO SOMEONE ABOUT THAT, YOU DONT NEED ANY ONE]\nTOMAKE YOU YOU FEEL ANYTHING. YOU HAVE TO LOVE\nYOUR SELF BEFORE YOU CAN LOVE ANY ONE ELSE.\nAND AS FOR YOUR BOYFRIEND. HE MAY  TREAT YOU\nLIKE A QUEEN. BUT UNTIL YOU FEEL THAT YOU ARE\nA QUEEN IT WONT MATTER. BUT TIME TO TALK TO]\nHIM AS WELL IF YOU ARE NOT HAPPY THEN TIME\nTO BE HONEST WTH HIM AS WELL AS YOUR SELF.\nGOOD LUCK.
341535
im going thru the same sort of thing. my relationship is way longer than yours and my guy is 24 and he is also working on a degree for computer science and forensics....i thought that was normal until i would go to his place and he would ignore me...i would just walk away and ignore him back! most of the times i fell asleep listening to music on my MP3 player which is sad! now my bf sort of passed that phase where videogames were his world but he still plays them and  the only thing i can do is to do my homework or read a book or be on my cell or cook or something. ...your bf is going thru some weird videogame stage where he wants to beat a level and he cannot therefore he gets frustrated therefore he curses and uses bad words because he is mad...! keep yourself preoccupied while he plays for lets say 2 hours tops and that is it! have a talk with him and tell him that if you are over you would appreciate it if he would nor curse and to pay attention to you and not the videogames! if he gets mad which he will tell him that he can play his game for an hour and then you two can watch a DVD and he cannot comment or make excuses!if he keeps it up just get  out of the relationship honestly since if he is willing to pay more attention to some stupid game and not the time he has with you he is taking you for granted! as for you putting up with his tantrums well, just get out of the relationship because you never know what can trigger him to go at your throat or call you names or curse you! he seems to have anger management problems and just because he has a bad day does not give him the right to take it out on you!!!!!! wha next, he will become physically abusive but by "accident" since he cannot control his temper?think of all the worst case scenarios and then think if you want to be with a guy who is obsessed with video games, does not spend quality time with you, treats you poorly, takes out his stress or bad day on you and gets aggrivated with you? even if you love him please leave him and i am giving you this advice as a friend since i am 22 also and in college, because he is pushing you away and throwing away the good relationship he has or by his actions he seems not to care for you anymore.. he takes you for granted and you are his outlet to release his stress and anger and bad day and nothing more... if he actually loved you he would spend time with you and would not treat you so poorly or take out his bad day on you but rather act nice, sweet, would not curse if he knew you hated it !\n\n\ningrid
124667
If I was in your position I wouldn't let things get to me.  You need to realize that if someone truly loves you and cares about you they will not treat you like that.  There are plenty of guys out there that would treat you much much better than that.  If you love him and want to be with him just give him his space and maybe eventually he will pull his head out of his a$$.  Don't feel bad and don't cry because I'm sure he doesn't care that you are crying and feel horrible.  Take it easy...the right guy is out there somewhere.
43846
maybe he wants to be able to try and do things for himself now that he's better.. and not feel like an invalid.. some men don't like to feel they can't do for themselves..you cared for him and nursed him back to health, just because he doesn't need or want your assistants as much don't mean he doesn't love you.. and if he's not so compassionate, maybe be you are overwhelming him with wanting to do for him so much or getting over emotional about it.. you should try to stop nurseing him and help him along with emotional support, love and understanding..when he needs your help, he'll ask for it.. Good Luck.. it's time to take care of yourself now..
417244
he is playing with your emotions. he also still wants to be with you but he doesn't want his male ego to be crushed as well he wants to be tough. also this guy keeps coming back to you because he knows that you wont and haven't turned him down when he needs someone. he wants you to remember him.  he is probably using you for an emotion crutch so what you need to do is not let him....when he comes crying for help deny him that and you will show him what place he is in and who runs it. you need to stand up for yourself and not accept his crying and whatever. he wants your attention and he is getting it when you give into him. don't let him do this....you will be just fine though what you need is a more emotionally stable guy because to me it is obvious that he is very unstable.
143239
I had the same problem with my present boyfriend.  Instead of trying to constantly get through to him (which can annoy the person after a while), just let him know that you are there for him and that he has no reason to keep his guard up.  This should only be told to him once, and whatever happens after that is up to him.  Though it may take a while for him to accept it and open up, it may work.
354312
Your question brought tears to my eyes.  Your life sounds like mine when I was 20.  My so called boyfriend and I are 5 years apart also and we have a child together.  Your fiance sounds just like mine years ago. The life you are living is a hard one, I can feel your pain.   I left my boyfriend several times because of his controlling crazy ways. My friends werent good enough, he didnt like me to go out, he was jealous of anything and everything.  And he accused me of sleeping with anybody and everybody (male, female, dog, cat, if I looked at it I was sleeping with it).  He couldnt hold down a job either.  He was a good father also.  Remember men like this make good fathers because they are CONTROLLING. I used to think is this all there is for me like you do but trust me its not.  You can take your child and raise it by yourself.  I raised 2 kids at your age by myself.  Trust me this man is only going to drag you down.  Here I am years 15 years later and I am STILL going back and forth with the same man.  Only difference is now he has changed he is no longer that controlling jerk he used to be.  But it took 15 years to get here. And that is only because he matured in some areas but in other areas he is still a jerk.  We dont live together so why am I holding on? I am working on myself now to figure that out.  My question to you is.  Do you want to wait 15 years like me for this man to finally treat you with the respect you deserve? I can see your like me, you need to save yourself from yourself.  I thought I was in love, funny thing is I still do, but I also know what is best for me.  Men like this never change.  Mine changed his controlling ways but only because he had no choice.  I have figured out through the years that guys like this are always going to find a way to hurt you.  The hurt never stops.  Don't say you made your bed so you should lie in it.  No one deserves the kind of treatment you receive.  I really think you will be able to make a good life for you and you child.  I did.  I am successful and have 2 great kids.  Funny thing is now "jerk" wants to settle down.  But the past is some thing you never forget.  Especially when he is still doing little stupid things that hurt me.  Like I said the hurt never stops.  I would love to give you strength and advice to help you through this because I can sense there is probally more to your story just like their is more to mine.  Dont think you are being selfish.  That was my problem years ago.  I put everyones happiness before my own.  Only sacrifice you need to make is for your child, remember that.  Your child needs to be raised in a loving argue free environment.  It is going to be hard.  Beause this guy has ahold of your mind, more than a hold on your heart.