A good friend of my mothers recently killed herself,  my mother is in druken hysterics,  ive tried to help.  but shes hateful and angry at everyone.  what do I do?
202385
write to her.  you can't lash out at a peice of paper.  tell her that you love her very much and that her behavior makes you worry.  tell her that what her friend did made you very sad as well but now your soul concern is her.  although you don;t think she would ever do the same thing, the way she is acting has you fearing for her personal safety and you love her too much to just look away.  if that doesn't work, and she really is staying in drunken hysterics, talk to your fellow family memebers- hve an intervention or have her committed.
511732
just take it easy... life is too short & it`s no time for hate your momm. be nice & make her loves you
506824
I had a friend just like him. My mother was diagnosed with cancer and was going through treatments. I was helping her as much as I could and my "friend" kept going on with drama stuff in her life. I got angry and told her to stop being so self centered and look what others are going through. She still did not get it and I finally wrote her a letter telling her that I could not take any more of her drama. It was stressing me out too much and I needed all my focus to be on my mom. To make a long story short, I ended up not calling her anymore and when she called me, I told her I could n't talk on the phone right now. I ended our friendship.......Do whats best for you, free your self from this drama. Theres nothing worse than having other people think YOU are a drama queen too because you hang around him.
90975
Dear Looking For..,\n There are many selfish people in the world that think 'if you are their friend you can have no other friends.' These people are insecure and they're probably some of the most depressing people you could choose to be around. Your 'suicide thoughts' might be because of this person is making you feel trapped and posessed by them (her). I advise you to get away from her and make new friends. She can grow up and except it or be lonely, but don't let her bring you down anymore! You aren't her property! \n\n If you have anymore suicide thoughts, Honey, go talk to your Mom or your school counselor, because you may need medicine to help you with depression. \n I wish you happiness and many new friends.\n           Hope_I_Helped!
134709
Well...it is good that the person has stopped complaining. I don't know what the situation is, but people should never thank that there is no hope because that is not true. The only time there is no hope is if we dwell on the problem and don't do anything to resolve the problem. \n\nThere is always hope. Your support is always helpful. Let her know that you care and are concerned for her. \n\nI would also suggest that she go get some counseling because often times, when people lose hope, they start to think about suicide. \n\nKeep in mind, you can tell her anything you can think of to tell her, but it is strictly up to her to break that spell that is binding her. \n\nBe positive. Don't offer pity because she will just thrive on that and it makes the problem worse. Be empathetic though. Let her know you understand the problem and you understand how she feels, but she just has to get up and get moving and stop feeling so sorry for herself and I would also recommend recommending counseling to her.
315577
I wonder the same thing. I try not to think about my sister hating me but it is really hard. My sister has caused problems between me & my mother just by doing things like you said: she would pick everything just to hurt you. I have shown my mother proof from my doctor that I am really ill & that I am dying but oh no my sister tells her that I am lying so now my mother refuses to talk to me. She says I made everything up even the letter from my doctor with his signature & the letter was written on letter head paper. Go figure. I made it all up. I wish that I wasn't dying. My sister says that she can't deal with my illness. I passed out one day asked her to take me to the hospital, says she can't deal with me. I don't know why she hates me. and I don't know how to handle it except for focusing on one day at a time. I have my husband and my daughter with me. She even told my husband something that my daughter did at her home, she was grounded for 8 months and then 2 months ago I found out from one of my other sisters that it was all a lie. she wanted to cause problems between my husband & I. She thought he would leave me over it. She has major problems. She has 2 daughters by her 4th husband. but actually the 1st one belongs to his brother but she confided in me not to tell him and I haven't. It has been 7 years and he still does not know. I don't cause her problems why cause me problems. Why can't she just love me? I love her with all my heart. I wish your sister would love you too. Maybe they are having emotional & mental problems and they have focused on us to take it out on so that they can live with it. I wish  you the best of luck in working things out with your sister. I am trying but to no avail.
188181
You're not a freak, nobody is. Life is a gift given to you - you should take care of it. It's hormones, mostly. The person who despises you is a jerk. Why are you trying to help her? Take care of yourself first, suicide's never the answer. Think of all the things you CAN do, not the things you can't. So what? People won't accept you, you should call them freaks. Remember your friends and family who love you. They strive to make you happy. For one second of torture, you would cause them a lifetime of pain. Live for others at least. Good luck.
408424
She needs HELP so , how can you assist her BE HONEST with her about what you feel she is doing to herself , then guide her to some professional or talk about why she is mutilating herself, maybe abusing going on from within family ???
230100
I don't know your mom but I know others like her.  Its always someone else's fault and the guilt trip they lay on people who are just "tired of hearing it" I am very familar with.  My ex's mother is this way.\n\nBut the talk of suicide is often a cry for help and should always be taken seriously.  Your mother has issues obviously.  My suggestion would be for you to call one of the suicide hotlines in your state and talk to a trained worker about whats going on with your mom and see what they tell you to do to help her or to help yourself.\n\nHere's a link with a listing by state.\nhttp://suicidehotlines.com/
185930
Tell her you care. and keep saying that. \n\n\n Suicide is a cry for help, when you feel alone.\n Don't let her feel alone.
570927
If your friend is cutting herself you need to tell someone.  She could really hurt herself and the longer she does it the worse that it will get.  She has to resolve these issues with her mom somehow in order for things to get better.  Your friend might not want you to tell, but for her own good someone needs to know who can help her.\nHave you thought about talking to your mom about this?  Your mom might be able to help and/or talk to your friend's mom about whats going on with her.  Maybe even have your friend talk to your mom - someone needs to help her with her emotions and the problems she is having at home.
109026
I don't think there are any words or anything anyone can say that will make this better for you and your friends family.  Acts like this are absolutely senseless!  Hatred is never easy to understand or make sense of and in this case it is senseless.  Just hold your friends memory in your heart and he will always be alive for you.  Continue on with the good you were doing, that can be the best legacy for the bad in this case.  I will be thinking of you.
248339
Got a 15 year old daugther going through this right now.  Been her dad and mom for 8 years now.  I don't know what to expect really in the future.  I know right now it's floating between hate and hurt.  I wished I knew how to help, but all I can do is be there for her and let her know dad loves her.
276434
I'm a male registered nurse. I wish I could help. \n\nContinue to talk with her... In this way, you are already helping the person because she gets to express her feelings which is therapeutic so that she will not consider any plan to kill herself. Let her cry...that's good.\n\nDetermine her plan of suicide. If she mentions about suicide, ask her directly if she has a plan or what is her plan.By knowing her suicide plan...you can prevent it from happening.\n\nRemove any sharp materials or ropes, belts, knife, pins, or just about anything that could harm her. I had experience with a patient who is commiting suicide using his own underwear. He wrapped it around his neck. But it was prevented.\n\nJust keep nearby so that she can call you when suicide thoughts are going back. Seek the help of the family members to watch her.\n\nGo to a psychiatrist and he can recommend for a court order for hospitalization if he thinks it's necessary. If you think that you friend has not been eating, bathing, or doing normal activities of the day...the more you should call.\n\nThe pills she is taking usually do not work until after 2--3 weeks of continuous taking. I'm assuming she is taking antidepressants such as Prozac, Tofranil, Imipramine, zoloft...\n\nfor more details....\nIM me now thru yahoo messenger: fire_syringe@yahoo.com
246446
My mother has bipolar disorder. I know what growing up with a depressive is like and I also know I have occuring syptoms of it. My best suggestion is to keep a diary or write poetry of current feelings... never look back. And get a pet or something to talk to, take care of and love. Try to be as independant as possible and continue taking your meds. Because it gets way worse when you don't. Independance, love, and ablity to write out your feelings help. Also I'd suggest talking to a good friend who might be able to help you make sense of yourself... my mother uses me as her thought sorter to help her understand better. Hospitals are the worst thing I believe you could go to... gives you no personal care.
118409
Is there someone in your family you can talk to about how you're feeling? A close friend? If not, there are hot lines you can call where they have experts available to help you, and help you find solutions to your problems. When people talk about killing themselves, it's usually a cry for help. You need to seek out that help (you've already taken the first step.) There are experts with a lot of experience that can honestly help you deal with whatever pressures, difficulties, or depression is causing you to feel this way. A lot of people have felt exactly the same way you are feeling, and have gotten through it. You're definitely not alone, and happiness is not something that is unattainable, even though it may seem that way now. I wish I could offer you better advice. I certainly know how you feel.
231074
First, I am a mother.  You need to think about what you are going to say before you say it. Remember she is the only mother you will have.  Also, try to explain to your mom how you are feeling.  This may help take away some of the frustrations you have.  I was a teenager once, I did alot of aruging with my mom as a teenager and it was about how i felt she was treating my brother a lot better than me, ect, which by the way she did, and now admits.  I ended up moving in with my dad and step monster, oops step mother, and It was find for like 4 months, then she showed her real colors.  It might not seem like it now, but try and talk with your mom, explain that you are just frustrated, and you need to tell her how you feel. I actually thought I hated my mom for many years, but now that I am older, I realize that i didn't hate her, I just did not like her actions, and the decisions she made.