we both agree that we just want to date... well really have sex. which is amazing. his longest relationship was 2 months.... weve been together for 3.5. I see him everyday. in fact we have sex and sleep together every night lately. when i put it was single on a site he seemed suprised. he doesnt mind that i flirt or dance w/ other guys but makes a point to tell them I am going home with HIM. is he just avoiding a relationship. or are we just fuck buddies.
214335
Well you have an open relationship.  If you can flirt with other guys and have a monogomous sexual relationship then more power to you.  I would be proud of having that type of relationship, see what else is out there and have a guy that wants to go home with you everynight.
544871
It's the nice comfy sweatshirt thing.  You see, in moving 1/2 way across the country, he had to give up his home, the folks he casually said Hi to everyday, his favorite pizza joint, etc.  He's lonely at his new place and has decided he wants friends.  Instead of letting them develop, he wanted some already instant made.  Well, there you are.  He already knew you, etc.  \n\nI had this happen to me.  Yes, he's interested.  Yes, you can have a relationship.  However, with everything being new to him now (but him learning it later on) that there will come a time when he doesn't need so much attention ... and he may develop into the guy you knew when he was in town.\n\nI wish I could say "Go for it."  My problem with trying it out is that he really does need to stand alone for a little bit, so you aren't the sudden substitute for his lack of companionship.  It gets pretty draining and depressing being both a person's newfound companion but also his blame when he feels he needs other friends.  You don't need that.\n\nGood luck!
664387
whats wrong with this picture? 1st of all, what is a "sex friend" relationship?? 2nd of all, you know he has "random sex" with a "few girls"and thats cool with u?...whats up with that?  3rd,  I wouldn't get my hopes up too much just because you spent a little QT around his parents. that doesn't mean as much to him as it means to you. 4th you are falling right into his game to keep you sprung! this dude is saying and doing all the right things to keep you around. lets see: free sex, no commitment (marriage), willing to accept me seeing other women, and pretty, what man wouldn't take you up on that offer?    \n\nto answer your question yes he has feelings for you.\nits impossible to have sex with someone over an extended period of time and not develop feelings for that person.\n\nsex is very powerful, it was designed to take place between husband and wife to make the marriage bond stronger. you are actually becoming one with that person when you are having sex. why do you think it hurts so much when you break up with someone after you have had sex with them?  it's not natural to try to have sex without getting emotionally attached...\n\ndoes he have feelings yes, now is he looking at you as a potential mate/wife? no, a man will let a freak be a freak but when he gets serious about a relationship he will look for a woman that has standards and some respect for herself.
354240
In my opinion you can have your friendship and date. I mean, it's not like the relationship would change drastically. You'll still be you and he'll still be himself, so that's not a very good reason. Plus, life it's about taking chances, not playing it safe just in case... that leads nowhere.\nSo, reason 1: done!\n\nAs regards the other reason he gave, I say bulls*it. That is just saying that he wants to be available to date any of the girls that flirt with him, or at least be able to choose. I mean, there are flirtatious girls just about anywhere, so what? He won't ever date a girl because there are flirtatious girls around the corner? What will he do when he gets married? "Oh, honey, I'm sorry I HAD to sleep with her... he was flirting so much she got me into it. It wasn't my fault."\n\nSorry, not good enough.\n\nDon't take it personal, but to me it sounds like he just doesn't wanna date. Period. Those just were excuses.\n\nKeep him as a friend if you want, but I'd highly recommend spending less time with him and trying to find another guy. Hang out with girl friends and look at cute guys, you never know what you may find.
337330
I'm having the same problem myself. The way I decided to solve my problem, was to be great friends, but casual daters. If you value your relationship (as friends and lovers) talk about it...over chinese food or pizza or something. Really talk about if you think the relationship will last more than a month and what would really change once you 'officially' started dating. would there really be a difference in how you act around each other other than physically (i.e. hand-holding, kissing, etc.)?
407911
I wouldn't sleep with him yet. 1 month isn't long enough to be able to judge what his true motives are. Make him sweat a bit longer. If he likes you, he'll wait. If he waits, you know he's with you because he likes you, not just because he wants to get it on.
132857
The tricks to relationship is leaving the other person wanting more.  That is to say that you do not give in to sudden urges while dating, not revealing too much, etc.  You pace yourself and preferrably after 3 months, you take it to the next level.  By then, a guy would either like you or show his true face; you'd simply saved yourself the hassle of trying to be intimate with someone who just wanted to show you around his bed, or yours.\n\nThe thing about relationships is that when you give him everything he wants from you in the beginning, you have a higher chance of ruining any interest that you have stirred within him to know you better.  Again, pace yourself out.  Let him get to know you better.  If he remains interested, he'll see you for who you are and your hook ups won't be merely hook ups anymore after those 3 months.  You'll be able to enjoy your beds a lot more because it's not meaningless anymore.  It would be more like an act of sharing each other and trying to please each other.\n\nBest wishes...
286156
He's just trying to convince you to have sex with him.  The truth is there are a lot of people out there who date and don't have sex.  Next he'll probably tell you,"well I guess your still a baby since you don't want to have sex. I'll go find someone else" LET HIM!! It's just another ploy to try and get you to have sex with him.  People who love each other don't try to force their partner into doing something they don't want to. Besides this guy is already a loser, do you want to be the next girl he got pregnant and doesn't have a realtionship with?
470422
Either he wants to continue having sex with you or he wants to be in a relationship but either way  his timing was a little off. See if he treats you like a girlfriend (phone calls during the day/night, coming over to see you,dinners etc) good luck
158449
From what you described, I'm 99.9% positive that he has feelings for you. His problem is that he can't make a decision for himself. He's sending you quite a few signals. He's waiting for you to make the first move before breaking it off with his current girlfriend. He's insecure. He doesn't want to be alone. Question is, do you have feelings for him? Do you want to be with a guy that insecure? Remember, the relationship will change once everything is out in the open. Which is more important to you? The friendship or the relationship?
87498
It sounds like he's just really afraid of getting hurt.  I wouldn't say your relationship is only sex though, you've had some great deep coversations and have been friends for a long time.  I definately think there is the potential for a good relationship here.  The only thing is, he needs to be on board.  Don't try to force a relationship if he's not ready.  Talk to him about it, and try to gain his trust.  Sometimes when someone has closed themselves off for that long, they have a hard time opening up again.
537669
Sex does not equal a relationship as far as guys are concerned.  Sex is a step pretty far down the road in any relationship no matter how cute the guy is!  If it's no sex, no relationship as far as this guy is concerned, then he doesn't really care for you and your feelings.  If the guy cares, he will wait and since you are so confused about it, so should you. This is an act you should be ABSOLUTELY sure about.  (Don't forget STD and pregnancy protection!!!!!!!)
353202
"I mean all he keeps talking about is our past realtionship. And how great the sex was...I think getting involved in a relationship will make things complicated for me...besides I think he's in love with some other chick."\nWith all of those red flags, there should be no reason to stick around.  Though some people may not agree with me, the easiest way to discover someone's intentions is through direct conversation.  If sex seems to be the only subject he can cover while speaking with you, then I think that your suspicions are correct.  I say that you continue doing what you are doing: excel in your studies and be a good mother to your child.  A good man will come along and, hopefully, at a better time.
7644
If he's not doing the dating stuff with you, he does not consider you dating material, you are a booty call at best. I have a friend like that, she is convinced that I feel more but I htink she is just trying to make herself feel better about it even though I am honest with her. He's not being honest with you, watch your back.
392834
What help do you want?  To know if he's interested in you?  I'll assume that's it.\nWell, it sounds promising.\nBut think, does he want to have a relationship with you or just have sex with you?  Is the chasing ever going to amount to anything?\nHave you talked to him and at any point told him you're not ready to date or you're not interested in a relationship?  If so, that could be why nothing has happened for him to show real interest in dating you.\nIt's a good sign that's he's not accepting free sex from anyone else, yes.\nThink hard, if you told him you were ready for another relationship, would he cringe or look hopeful?  Not sure, try telling him something along these lines, without directly involving him in the question.  See how he reacts and gage by that.  Or, just have a conversation about it.  \nI had a similar situation, except when I made a move back, he totally stopped wanting me.  Until I hadn't seen him for a year and had finally given up and started dating someone else who I love.  Then he saw me and couldn't stop trying to hold my hand and telling me how he made a mistake.\nSometimes guys who chase do it because they don't know what they want and, when they're confronted with it, they don't know what to do with it and turn into jerks.  They might come around later but you don't want a guy like that, trust me.
654362
yea, it was wrong of u to lie to him in the first place. but from how i see it, i dont think u should just sit around and wait for him to come around. who knows when he'll get over it? n the idea of him suggesting u two becoming sex buddies made me confused about his intentions. and men dare say women are complicated! but anyway, i think u should just go out and see other people. if he gets upset, ask him what are u suppose to do? wait for him until he realises that he wants u more than a sex buddy? what would that make u? sounds pretty desperate to me... BUT, if your heart thinks he's worth it and he is more than what u made him appear to be, then stay home, be good, show him you're worth falling in love with, and keep waiting. just make sure u're happy. it's all that matters.
320173
Well he's using you...  Are you using him the same way?  If you've staked your heart in this guy, you might want to start moving on.  If you're having as much fun as he is though, just go with it.  A person's past CAN turn another person off of dating them.  That doesn't mean you can't be friends.  Or friends with benefits.  Seems like your guy wants to be friends with benefits.  Make sure you know and are clear about what you want and expect with him.  If you are both on the same page, great.  If not, you might need to work out a new arrangement...