If your mate emptied your joint savings account from gambling and the problem caused all of your checks to bounce, such mortgage, telephone, light etc. What would you do?
207797
It's so easy to actually answer this question, but it's a different story when you are actually living it.  This is probably the same answer as living with someone with any type of addiction...drugs, alcohol, gambling, s@x, etc.  It's a sickness.  The first question would be, does this person recognize their problem?  Is some sort of intervention needed?  You obviously love this person, so walking out is probably your last resort.  If this person doesn't recognize their problem...then it's time to start thinking about walking out, this could be your intervention.  However, this person has to clean up for themselves.  Not for you, not for their parents, workers, etc.  They have recognize their problem and want to fix it. That's when your support is most crucial. I don't think it's a win-win situation when someone is stopping thier ways for someone else. They have to stop because they want to.  Part of that equation is seeing what they have done to others.  At the sametime, from this point on, you should be protecting yourselves.  That means your bank accounts and anything else that he has access to.  I'm not sure what state you live in, but certain states have laws that can help protect you.  You can put a block (freeze) on your credit files.  This will enable you to have some sort of control over your credit.  Also, contact the various credit agencies....Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion.  See what options you have to protect your credit from being used.  You don't want this person opening accounts in your name.  Of course, getting a free credit report from all of the above will show you who has accessed your file recently.  Additionally, I would give your state Consumer Protection Section a call, to see what else you can do.  You're in a tough situation.  You have to protect yourself and be there for support at the sametime.  I wish you the best of luck!
645259
I hate to sound naive, but what actual proof do you have that she was actually "stealing" the money?\nis is remotely possibly she was taking the money for any other reason, take you on a surprise vacation?. SOunds wonderful I know. Lets say it is even worse, she was taking the money. How long have you been together? what are your ages? Do you have chidren who will suffer from the breakup? It is possible that she has a problem, a very bad one (no i am not talking about a sick aunt in MAine, but maybe she gas a gambling problem, or worse a drug addiction. What if she owes some scary goons money and they have been threatening to blackmail her or hurt her physically. I think you need to do one of two things\n\n(1)nothing) keep monitoring the situation and although i am not normlly an advocate of invading anothers personal privacy, the circuastances call for it here. Use technology to find out for sure what she is up to. Place a tracer on her phone, car etc. if she is stealing catch her in the act. Have concrete proof. If she is in trouble and needs you ;are you going to be there for her? Do you love eher enough fo rthat?\n\nI think you need more evidence b4 you make a hasty, rash decision about this woman that you suposedly love. Your actions will affect the rest of your life. I would just want to be 100% sure before I did anythign I may even remotely reget later, or that I could never take back.
349151
Certainly wouldn't want to add to your worries mate by condemning you. Whats the big bugga if everyone gets what they want in the end? You did right by me if you didnt just force the issue and try to live beyond your means. Sorry about your losses love, monetary  and otherwise.
512757
He is unemployed and buying games? You are helping out financially while he is unemployed and buying games?  You are about to learn a life lesson through experience and nothing anyone tell you is going to change you actions at this point. Learn from it once reality comes crashing down.
367504
There are some possibilities that would allow them to do this. \n\nIf the account from which the money was taken was in your control, then yes.  That means if YOU had the right to take the money out without consulting them, then it was as much your money as it would have been without them on the account.  \n\nYou have to distinguish between the checks and the account. As checks, they were probably the sole property of the individual, but if they were placed into an account that had your name on it, it became yours. \n\nI doubt they would have taken it otherwise.
262614
once you make a withdrawal at the fidelity bank and trust, there's no going back.  what she does is not the husband's fault.  as adults we should accept the consequences of our actions.  he should dump her.
600003
you should call your bank that issues your checks immediately if you haven't already done so... They will close your account and you won't be held responsible for those checks.
490565
We had a similar problem The bank will follow through as they will want there money back also. The best thing is to protect your details I dont deal with anyone that does paper transactions anymore as Our details were taken from a carbon in th rubish of a chineese Resturant so if there machine isnt working we go elsewhere.
514409
You have answered your own questions above.\n1. you no longer love your wife.\n2. you have been neglected.\n3. your marital relations leave you sleeping alone.\n4. you have started another relationship -although platonic for now, with someone else.\n5. all you need is some guts to tell her the truth and be done with it, why drag it out-not helping you or her.\nHer gambling is HER PROBLEM, not yours, remember that.\ngood luck.
165678
If I were him I would quickly  hide my assets.\nGet the books Hide Your Assets and Disappear\nand How to Be Invisable.\n\nHe needs to become judgement proof fast. This means he has no assets that can be found to attach. That would certainly be what I would be working on if I were him.\nIf he has been served with a Notice of Default Judgement, I think that is pretty much the end of it. He is in default and the judgement is that he is liable and it is over.\nJust hide you assets fast, that is the only thing you can do.
499474
I can tell you how to find out okay?  tell her that you made a terrible investment and lost all your money.  if she really loves you she'll stay with you, but, if she takes off, you'll know she was only in it for the money.  \nI hope things work out for you.
438206
Sue your Partner make him help you. take the tennant to court and get your money
608022
Before removing your self from mortgage, why did you leave the property?\nGo to a lawyer and take his advise pronto.
539491
Depends on what happened - sudden illness might be a good excuse not to get mad, however I doubt it is the problem here- no reason to keep serious matters from your mate, esp if they involve selling the house to get out of debt that was hidden or otherwise lied about. Deception of any sort is a LIE and this is the ultimate deception if not outright betrayal of the mate.\n\nYes it would bother me. The usual reasons - gambling, drugs, etc., for this type of problem indicate that the mate would drag you down like a rock around a drowning person's neck. If the money was spent on an adulterous affair, that is bad also! \n\nYou'd never have anything - peace, security, trust (in your mate), as long as you were with this person, not even a home. You would have to wake up day to day not knowing what disaster awaited you. Even your health would suffer - the stress of the situation, no money for medical insurance or medical care because of mate's financial fiascoes - would make the situation a hell on earth.\n\nI'd rather live alone. If children are involved, the insecure environment would not be something good for them, not to mention the arguing etc that goes with it.
448981
The M/O could "bounce" because it could be fradulent. I would contact the bank regarding the check before depositing to make sure its authentic or bring it in person to your local bank and ask them to verify it.
301984
Dear Friend,\n\nIt's time to consider filing for bankruptcy.  Your ex is broke, and there's no way the state can be held liable.  Sorry, that's the bottom line.\n\nYour Friend,\nFrancesois
580727
I'm not a lawyer or a banker, but I think the POINT of a joint checking account is that the money in it belongs both to person A and person B so they are well within their legal right to withdraw any and all funds even if depositied by person A.\n\nedit: you should talk to your bank