My male fiancee has 2 brothers and a grown up son from his first marriage. There are plenty of people out there to carry on his family name. I am an only child and there are no men left in my family to carry on our name. Should he take my last name when we wed so that I wont be the last of my clan?
211145
I asked my husband if he wanted to take my last name when we married. (I knew I wasn't going to change my name.) He said he'd had his name a long time, and he was kind of attached to it. So he kept his and I kept mine.\n\nI'm very close to my family, though, and he's not at all close to his. So when our children were born, we gave them my last name.\n\nSo you don't have to be "the last of your line" whether he takes your name or not!
460935
If you move your new spouse into your home you don't need to do anything.  If you're buying a home together then should't both names be on it?  I wouldn't buy a house with someone and not put my name on the deeds - husband or not!
362434
Basically, I think your mother is right. It is your job as a parent to protect both your children.  This situation is not good for either of of them.  This is your husband's father but If he is not able or willing to stand up for his children then you will have to take a stand with both your husband and his father.  He may feel more for one child than another but he should never let the children know that he has those feelings.  I brought two daughters into a second marriage, had three more children and my in-laws never made any difference between them.  It never occurs to my five children that they are anything but full blood brothers and sisters.
167581
The only choice that I can think of is marriage by proxy. That would mean that your fiancee would need to choose someone to stand in for him. You should check with the local clerk's office to find the answer. They would be able to tell you whether or not you could perform a ceremony without his physical presence being required.
201495
Well when i have a son with my boyfriend, Im going to name him after my boyfriend. It was a family thing so why not continue the generation? I dont mind, a name isnt who you are its just a name. I dont think its so much of a big deal as long as the mother and father agrees.
516641
Your post does not discuss why you want to marry your "collegue" or how you feel about him.  Without knowing if this is what you truly want all I can say is follow your heart which means if you love him and want to marry him and it will not cause you to lose your family then marry him but if you are marrying your "collegue" because you observed a "quite good" nature then you should wait and listen to those you trust which sounds as if it may be your family.
621827
well ,.. i dont see anything wrong with keeping your last name,.. its yours! its a part of you and it has been for a long time,.. look,.. whether you change your name or not it does not mean tha tyou care and love your husband any less,.. amybe he needs to be reminded of that,.. and while you are at it remind him what year we are living in,.. !
560717
Actually when I got married the first time I kept my name and added my new husbands. Therefore I actually had 2 last names. My husband didn't like it that much, but as I told him, at least I took his name, but I will never lose who I was before the wedding. I would never take on a name for the reason to make one happy. Only reason to take the name is if you really want that to be your last name.
635605
ur a sweet husband.. just dont overdo it with the name thing...by the way...i think its sweet for u to do that.
157961
My fiance and I have been toghether for 6 years.  We know we are going to be together, and I would probably end up losing the ring somewhere anyway..  SERIOUSLY.  If he HAD to get me something, I would prefer he spend the money on something we can have or do together, or put the money he would have spent on the ring into savings.  Because no one should ever get married until they can support each other.  That is what being married is all about.  I don't know why all these KIDS are getting married, but they are living with their parents, or having to call home for money, or having kids...it makes no sense.  My sister got married 2 years ago, had a big wedding, and now she is divorced.  We have been toghether for 6 years, and we are still together.  We just finished college two years ago, and will not be married until we are in a financially stable position to be married.
94524
nope. it is perfectly OK to keep your maiden name if you wish. you can also hyphenate if you like. keeping your maiden name just means that you don't have to change all of your legal stuff(license, credit cards etc...) to your married name
70072
Spring 2006, what a wonderful hopeful screen name.  Glad your not here in a desert where its 90 degrees.  How about that spring for you.\n\nI am a third generation name sake and I will be expecting the fourth generation here in the next few days.  You do not have to congratulate me, only give me best answer, that is gift enough!\n\nNames have nothing to do with such relationships.  Relationships are built between 2 people, usually naming comes from the parent.  So there is no bonding done by the baby, not yet that is.\n\nChildren cognitively cannot comprehend the likeness, youth usually resent such things, it is not until your an adult that you appreciate the heritage that was passed.\n\nYour word intense, not so.\n\nOn the ligher side of intense relationships, the first night I met my wife (at that time future Mrs)I told her that if were to ever get married and have our first son, there would be a no compromise of his name, not even a talk.  And to this very day our relationship has been fine.  Im jus glad we did not have a girl\n\nHappy heritage hunting!  All hail my future IV!!
380497
I agree Matt...and it seems most on here have kinda missed the question...or maybe I have.\n\nIt's not what you call him as a term of endearment....although I think that's a great question I'd like to see all the answers to. What I think you're asking is how you refer to that person in your life....when introducing them to others, or talking about them to others.\n\nWith my ex I used partner and hated it. It sounds like we're CPA's together or something. \nLife partner is icky \nBoyfriend sound like we're in Summer camp\nLover...eeewwww\n\nEven though we were together for a decade I never used husband because it is a lie. We had not exchanged vows in our church (though we would have been allowed to get married there). I think marriage is a deadly serious thing that I do not want to cheapen by using it erroneously.\n\nSo, I ended up using partner and probably (hopefully) will again in the future. But I'd sure like something else.\n\nI don't think this is uniquely gay either...straights don't really have a better word, do they?
19813
Yes. Because of this, most families choose to keep boys in order to keep their family name going. There are a surplus of baby girls needing homes over there.
499715
I've had my last name all my life, it's not fair that he gets to keep his last name and I have to change mine. We're not going to have kids, so it's not like we'd have problems with their last names. My last name represents my roots, my people, my heritage and I'm not going to erase it.
262520
Absolutely......If your adopted parents can't help you with the name and address then you can request this through your local courthouse or through the attorney that handled the adoption. I wish you the best of luck with your marriage and your new life with your biological dad. I hope only for the best for you and your new spouse. Congrats!
284561
The first question you need to ask yourself is this...who exactly are you marrying? Your sweety or your sweety family? It's you and your sweety who has to live together (unless you're living with the family too) and while being accepted into the family is a good sign of approval, remember they have their life, you have to live yours and find your happiness. Good luck!