I try to talk to my wife about my problems but she just says why don't you just do this or that. I tell her that I can't just do anything without worry about the outcome. I have a social disorder that make me not want to be around a large crowd of people. She can't understand that because she is so outgoing.  We just don't have anything in common but our grand daughter.  Sometimes I just need someone to talk too.
210292
Of course.  Yeah you guys aren't on the same level in that regard.  It's perfectly exceptable to find someone esle to talk to about things that your wife can't.  You should check out Luke 12:22.  Great read.  basically says, "don't worry"....it's a good sigh of relief sometimes.
149305
I suffer from depression a lot of the time because I'm 18, married, with a 4 month old, and time get very hard. My husband and I struggle to become one with each other but he drinks and it sometimes gets hard to get close especially intimately. But I pray and try to keep my mouth closed about some of the things I don't like him doing in hopes he will recognize them on his own.
300075
I'm glad you were able to get that off of your chest, but I'm not really sure what you are seeking here?\n\nSounds like you are in a rock and a hard place and you have tried communication to no avail.\n\nSometimes you have to cut line and move on.  I'd hate for someone to say this to me, I love my hubby very much, but in your shoes, if he were not listening to me or my feelings on the matter, and issuing dictates on how and when I could talk, it would be time to walk.\n\nGood luck with this.  I hope you find peace.
80451
Although you can't force her to do anything, I would strongly urge her to seek help.  This is not normal, and if she goes through with it she will hurt a lot more people than just her and her husband.
410065
My heart goes out to you and your family. I've been married to the same wonderful man for thirty-one years. Twice prior to my knowing him he tried to kill himself. Since we have been together he has made 4 more attempts on his life. I don't know where you are from but most places have mental health assocations. They can help you to understand medications, patiants rights. For my husband I am his health care rep. when he can't speak-up for himself I have the legal right to do this . I got him to give me power of attorney so I can deal with his disabilty money and all the red tape that goes along with it. Your Mom's illness if she does have Bi-polar suicide is attempts can be a part of her illness. It is a long hard road and you need to seek help yourself so you can stay healthy enough to be an assistance in getting her the help she needs. There are support groups for families going thru what we both are. When my husband gets what I call imbalanced with his medicine it takes me giving him his meds. because he gets confused about days and times to take them. As we both turn 50 this year it seems like second nature to us to deal with his illness. His last attempt to take his life was last November. He was missing for 2days before he was found in a coma in our truck at a reststop we use to stop at a lot. It was very sad, I still am seeing a counslor myself to deal with learning who I am outside of his illness. Be careful not to become so involed you stop living like I have at times
211087
This happens alot in my house, mainly becaise my husband is from India and I am American. He says things and it set's me off fairly fast then I make every one mad. To avoid this, dont say things you know she dont want to talk about, it it is sticking in your mind, then write it in ajernol, but stop talking on topics that are touchy for her. It's not always easy, infact it will feel like you give more effort then she and latter in life it will come back to hurt you, so learn now to let things go, because you will have other issues to deal with that are far more important. Choose your words wisely, and learn to live as one or not at all.
423678
unless you want to chance sexual transmitted diseases I would talk with your wife and explain that you are not happy and discuss it with her. Maybe there is a problem you can talk to her about,
609053
My husband has the same problem with one of my friends and he just doesn't interact with her.  I will go out with my friend and he doesn't come along.  If its a friend of the family and you see her, then try to avoid her and if you do have to be close and speak to her, you can still be cordial and kind without having to carry on a lengthy conversation or be rude in what you say.  \n\nTell your wife that you won't like everyone that you come in contact with.  EVER!  Personalities clash, views of specific ideas or other things are very opposite.  Just because she is a friend it doesn't mean that you have to be.  Don't you have a friend that she doesn't like?  Its fine and she is wrong to make you be her friend.
441953
ive felt that excat same way! my boyfriend is an isolater, and wants to deal with his problems on his own. it really makes me mad because i want to help him, i want him to just talk and get it out, but you cant make anyone do anything that they dont want to. im the kind of person that wants to talk about problems, you know, get them off my chest, but because he isnt like that, he doesnt undersand my need to deal with things that way. he feels that nobody understans what he is feeling and by telling me, i will only worry and not be able to fix them anyway. he loves me more than anything, but since he doesnt deal with things my way, he doesnt really know how. it doesnt mean he doesnt care about me, it just means he doesnt handel things the same as me! i hope things get better hunny!
216362
Too many times if of the one party's move to be with other it seems to fail. If not from the area this one of the stresses not being with your family. Trying to fit in the new area finding that job,  find friends, and other social actives it is hard all causing great problems in a relationship.
123002
my wife has been diagnosed with depression and put on 100 mg of Zoloft. Things have been rather rocky for the last few months around here. I believe she hasn't been making some decisions as rationally as she used to, and our ability to communicate is slipping. we are encountering quiet a few problems lately . I do think some of them are due to her depression but not all of them
329616
How would a marriage with this lady work, if everytime she hears about something she does'nt like she shuts you out?Every relationships NEEDS communication whether its about something good or bad. Try finding a way to talk to her and let her know your sentiments - e-mail her or write her a  letter or something. Hopefully she will come around and you can sit down and discuss your future, what it will be like and what you want out of each other. If she does'nt, save yourselve any further heartache now and forget it. If she shuts you out for something so small - marriage with her would just be torture. You deserve to be happy!!!!
478200
For what it's worth, I would believe her. I am in the same situation and as recently as today have struggled with those same things in every attempted relationship and even friendship. When she said 'stupid things bug me.' It sounds to me like her reason is more for your benefit. I get extremely irritable and the smallest most insignificant thing can enrage me. This is extremely difficult and hard to contain. I know when this was happening in relationships I was mad at myself, because its just the way I am, but also embarrassed and sick of apologizing and having to try and explain. In the end, I had felt that I was putting the other person through far more than he'd ever expected, or could honestly deal with. Not thinking things through is impulsiveness. In my 8 years of Bipolar disorder I have found irritability and impulses to be my #1 downfall. I never said anything either, I would just explode the minute he left the room. I may not be exactly right, but having gone through almost the same situation, being a girl who has long time struggled, I would say I'm probably pretty close. Let me know if that helps at all.
474610
I look at it like this.When u get married u will lose all your rights in doing something alone.So u need to stand your ground and do this for u.Plus explain to her what u just said to us. If she doesn't understand then u need to really evaluate your relationship with her. I mean if she is this troubled about something this small then what happens when u two have real problems.I wish u all the luck.
116371
I think you should go over to her place and try to reconcile with your wife.  What was wrong in the first place?  Why can't it be fixed?  You obviously loved her before, right?  So maybe her making you come to her place is her way of saying (perhaps without her even knowing) that she wants to see you too!?
551030
Hi you right it's not worth fighting over. Maybe she just feels like she can't talk to you about certain things that are happening in her life right now. I wouldn't worry to much about it. People sometimes find that it is easier to confide in strangers. That way no one will be able to judge her.
69080
you sound just like me. i'm trying to work things out but i know the end result will be me leaving. i just want to be able to say that i gave it my all and totally mean it. sometimes we just outgrow them. have you ever tried to start some sort of hobbie with each other or do a date night? maybe that will get something going for you. i tried that. my husband didnt even care to go through with any of it. he just agreed to it and never did it. i'm writing a book on my horrible marriage. as soon as i get enough crap for my book i'm out. its not worth it to stay.