I'm dating a guy who has a girlfriend. He stays with her because if he doesn't he won't be able to see his kids. It's not possible for him to successfully take her to court over it because of his criminal background. It's difficult for me knowing that he's with her, but saying he cares for me. What Should I do?
216177
i know you have heard this saying \n\nif you love something let it go if it comes back its tru love \nu don't know for sure hes not sleeping with her when your not with him don't let his words mess with you you need to think about this and trust me if he loves you he will find away to see his kids and not her
215735
Are you sure you want to put yourself in that situation. It doesn't really sound like a start to a healthy relationship.  Why is he in jail? Does the reason he is in there bother you at all?
100402
No. You need to let your girl handle it. Tell her you support her and that she is more than welcome to ask your help if she feels she needs it. My question to you though is what is your girl telling her ex? Is she making it known that she is seeing someone else and is happy in that relationship? Let your girl know that you have no problem stepping in to take care of the situation if her ex won't listen to her.
276039
this is one of the problems you encounter when you get involved with a guy that has an ex and kids. not much you can do. you didn't say how many kids he has but..she won't be able to get away with it forever, plus when he goes to the hearing he needs to let them know how much of a hardship she is creating for him. as far as child support goes they fill out financial statements etc. eventually the divorce will be granted whether she signs or not. aside from that, who cares what she is blaming it on? that doesn't change the reality of anything so don't even worry about that, it isn't worth the energy. if you really love him very much you won't let this come between you, you knew his situation when you started dating him, no point in complaining about it now, just deal with it the best way you can. she will eventually get over it and move on, it could be a long road though so just buckle down and hang in there and make sure he fights for himself and doesn't just hand her whatever she wants out of guilt. good luck to you, it will get better!
349270
are you aware that not everyone has baby momma/daddy drama in their lives just because the parents aren't together.  are you secure with yourself?  if not then don't date someone with children. it's ok and don't worry about it, lots of people fee lthat way.  some people just don't like kids. but if you do decide to date some one with childen, then you have no choice but to deal with it.  that parent gets visitation with his/her kid/s and it's not about the mother/father or you.  they're divorced for a reasnon.  would you rather the parents didn't get along and the child to suffer for your insecurities? and what about the child that may not care for you, thinking you're trying to replace the natural parent? the relationship between child and parent is important, none of anyone business (unless it's abusive) and not about you.  lot at is as a positive, the parent is able to visit the kind at the kids home with maturity and knowledge that the kids mother has moved on.
255710
I say if he is hangin out with her like best of buddies, then something is going on.I talk to my ex but I don't hang out with him.TEll him how you feel, if he defends her then you don't need him because she will always be in the way.The only reason they should be atleast talking is if there is kids involved, otherwise there should not be any reason for them to be hanging around eachother.Good luck !!
375305
I'm a female.  But if I was in that man's shoes, I would not take that lightly.  How can she be such a con?! \n\nThen I would sue for custody of the child.  How do I know if she will look after the child being a liar that she is.  She is just a bad person all round. \n\nI would be ashamed to call her my friend if I were you.  There's nothing wrong with him not using protection.  He had the knowledge that she wouldn't fall pregnant.  He was just decieved.  Period.
445287
Leave things alone and let it work itself out. You haven't done anything so if you start trying to fix it then it's only going to make you look even more guilty. He'll learn in time that you never did any of the things she said and he'll have to be the one to find a way to make it up to you. Let him see that your a stronger person then what she is making you out to be. and he will respect you more for it. I would just let him know that your not guilty but your not going to start trying to prove it to him either, and that he'll have to work it out himself. If you start having to prove things to someone you will be having to prove things to them from now on. If his going to believe you then let nature take its course. As for her why are you even friends with her. Dump her and if you do date her ex so what, that's why his her ex.
110880
I'm in the same situation as you so I understand your feelings very well. \nI think if his ex knows about you, if she knows that he is in a serious relationship with you, then I think you don't have to worry so much about them keeping in touch. But if you are feeling uncomfortable with it, you should tell him that you're concerned about what's going on between him and her. You shouldn't stay quiet as if you don't mind whatever he does. He seems to be very serious about you though you never know what his true feelings are. He must be in love with you, but he still could have feelings toward his ex, and his ex still could have feelings toward him. It happens. \nSo....just open up ur mind and talk to him honestly.
663181
Yes you are.  He has a girlfriend, and he's keeping you on the sidelines just in case it doesn't work out.  Leave him be.  You deserve someone that can be with you and treats you with love and respect.
604186
If someone tells you they are falling for you it's a good thing - it means they are falling in love with you.  You didn't mention how old the child is - if the child is old enough to know that you are the girlfriend then he might just be waiting to introduce you to make sure it will work.  He may not want his child getting attatched to a girlfriend if he isn't sure you are going to be around for a while.\nYour best bet is to talk to him and tell him how you feel.  Ask him why you haven't met his child and tell him that you want to meet his child and get to know him/her.
560165
The best scenario is to talk to his ex in person one-on-one.  If she is a slut she will lie, if she wants a relationship then she won't.\n\nFamilies will not take your side, they will do what is in their children's best interest.  So don't take anything they say as the truth.\n\nI hate to say this, but you gotta play the game. If you really love him, you have to do everything you can to save the relationship.
304223
Your story is very difficult to follow.  So, if I understand, this guy and his underage girlfriend want to take your daughter whenever they want.  Unless there is a court order you DO NOT have to hand your child over.  Especially to another child or CHILD MOLESTOR.\n\nSince he is 19 and she is 15, (and was 14), you could turn him in for the contributing to the delinquency of a minor.  And from what you said, she is delinquent.  He's just perverted.  You don't need him in the childs life.  Sue for child support and block his access to your child.  He seems to like them young.\n\nIf he gets help PROFESSIONALLY then maybe some time in the future he may have rights to visit his child.  But until you can insure the safety of the baby, keep him and that wacko girlfriend away.  Make this clear to the judge.\n\nGood Luck
73031
The girlfriend has no right to be there.  If fact the girlfriend has no rights whatsoever when it comes to your child, even if the ex and she get married.  I am guessing that your son is in the hospital because he is sick (or has some major medical issues) and therefore the extra stress of someone being there that is not wanted isn't doing your son any good.  If she cares about your son at all, she will respect his wishes.  What I am wondering however is how old is your son?
360623
You say in your profile that you are sexy....and intelligent.\nSo show some intelligence. He is not your soul mate - you are his sold -mate... bought and sold good and proper. \n\nWhat is this 'love'? A reaction to the way he is mis-treating you? Does it align with how you were treated in the past? \n\nIf this were true 'soul-love' there would be no question. He is clearly lacking in integrity... the girlfriend with kids are not being properly looked after, and neither are you. If he leaves them for you - how could you trust him. \n\nThere are plenty of other men around who would be so much better for you. Don't get so lost on the physical attraction, coz that's all this seems to be. Not love... love is reciprocated. This doesn't appear to be. \n\nOkay, so we're only getting a short bit of one side of this, but read all of the comments here, girl... we've all seen enough - on both sides of the gender divide - to know when you are being done over.\nAnd you are. \nLike a kipper.
670197
I can relate.  First off, make your boyfriend get a lawyer to defend his rights and make sure the childs rights to him are met.  That way she can't use the child against him, for her guilt purposes or manipulation.  He doesn't want to look back and have crap over his head that he should sort out now and be done with.  I think that alone will put an end to having to deal with the ex only for about the child reasons.  Then have a talk with confidence about the ex situation.  She is trying to make him miserable and if putting trouble in your relationship is a way she will use it.  Don't sound jealous or too upset, just concerned and caring about what you two have now.  Let him understand that being with him also means you are part of this equation and your feelings matter,  Then afterwards have a great (you know what I mean girl) evening with him so he doesn't forget that working things out with you ALWAYS will pay off.  GOOD LUCK!
6993
Wow, tough problem. I think what I'd do is have a heart to heart with the girlfriend. Maybe she really does want him to be happy with you and maybe it's him that's holding out hope for a renewed relationship with her. If that's the case, she'll need to back off, but you need to find out if that's really the way it is or not first. Good luck. I feel for you.