Holy Saturday night I will come into full communion with the Catholic Church. I was so thrilled for the longest time and simply couldn't stand waiting so long. I'm also going to get to celebrate my first sacrament of reconciliation in a week and I was looking forward to it with so much joy but now, because my priest hurt my feelings, everything has changed. I feel stupid and want to get over it but can't and I am so upset this has all happened so close to the big day because it's like it's been ruined for me. I went to Mass tonight and didn't look at Father even once, not even during the homily. I can't just 'get over it' and see no point in telling him he hurt my feelings because I know he didn't do it on purpose and I'd feel foolish telling him why he hurt my feelings to begin with. I can't make him care for me as I'd like him to, right? It's not his fault I see him as a father figure. I know I'm ridiculously sensitive but can't change that. What should I do??
209858
Be honest with yourself. To err is human to forgive is .....
171920
Too bad the Catholic casts doubt on that which has not happened to him/her.    When I was 12 I was confirmed in the Lutheran church.   It meant that I had to stand before the congregation and answer a whole bunch of questions.  I was sacred silly and devoid of answers.\n\nMy pastor took our class down into the basemant and prayed for us.   All of a sudden the fear completely left me and I felt powerful and taller than everybody else.   I had always been very shy and timid like my father.  \n\nThe feeling left after the ceremony but I wanted to find it again but didn't know how.   I searched for 29 years for that power and boldness till I walked into a small pentecostal church and found it again and was baptized in the Holy Spirit for good.\n\nMy speaking in tongues gift is now the ability to perform in music and to speak and testify about my love for Jesus boldly and without fear.   I thank God for a true born again experience.\n\nGod works in mysterious ways and be very careful putting down others for the way they act when filled with the spirit.   Running, screaming, laughing are all things that God has given to us to express ourselves.   Don't put the Holy Spirit in a box.. Seek Him and He will set you free.   Would you jump and shout like the cripple in the Book of Acts Chp. 3?    Why not???
430731
I think the trick is letting Him.  I mean, we're so quick to hang onto guilt about stuff, that we can't believe that we can ever be forgiven, be healed of our emotional hurts.  I say, the next time anyone asks Him for help, imagine Him saying, "Thou art healed."  Then BELIEVE it.  You'll be surprised how fast your tears dry up.  Even if you don't want to believe it, do...for about 30 seconds....then 30 seconds more...then 30 seconds more.  See if you're not up and smiling and dancing after that...In some ways, it is the power of suggestion.  But isn't that what God is--the "suggestion" that you are healed just by asking Him to make it so?
525072
I am 23 now and right about 14 I started questioning being Catholic also.  I think at around 14 you realize the world isn't fun and games like you thought it was and start to have to act like an adult.  Up until I was 14 my parents were the ones who brought me up Catholic, and then all of a sudden it seemed as if it was up to me.  I think you are at an awesome point in your walk with Christ.  Don't give up or give in to the lies that you are wrong.  \nThis is a learning expirience for you.  I went through the same thing, only it took me till about 2 years ago to figure it all out.  I am so much stronger now, so don't give up.  I think you are just at the age where you are taking the responsibility out of your parents hands and are now having an awesome individual relationship with God.  It is kind scary and it makes you question a lot, but stick with your faith and you will be so much stronger and it will help for those future temptaions.  \nThe world is going to throw a lot more out there, and it is going to be harder to deal with as time goes on.  Questioning isn't bad, as long as in the end you are closer to God.  Good luck and God bless!
244760
I am so sorry about your PPD.  It's rough.  Do not, for one instant, allow yourself to think that you are at fault.  When something happens to one of you, it happens to both.  You are supposed to be "ONE".  He abandoned you in your time of need - he should have backed you up and been there.  He wasn't.  He went for the easy out and that's not what you deserve.  I don't want to get all religious on you, but here goes:  A man is supposed to treat his bride (his wife) like Christ treats His church.  Do you feel that you were given that?  Is he true to his vows or is he just out for himself?  I would suggest that you get therapy - either with or without him.  Preferably with.  But I know that it's not also possible with finances and insurance these days.  But sometimes you can find someone to help you sort it all out that won't cost an arm and a leg. \n\nJust think about this:  Your son/daughter will see how you are treated.  They will probably (not always) go on to treat their spouse the same way.  Do you want to continue this cycle or break it?  Do you want better for your child?\n\nI am so sorry that you had to go through PPD and had to do it alone - because face it...you were deserted.  \n\nAn affair is an affair is an affair- whether emotional or physical.  The time and consideration he gave this other woman should have gone to you in your time of need.
77465
Reconciliation or confession.  Look in the bulletin.  Show up.  Tell the priest how long its been and they'll guide you through it.
153972
I completely kow how you feel I went through the same thing with my husband the only man I was ever with and still with. I couldnt wait for him to marry me so I could finally enjoy our sexual relations,I even remember crying during sex the guilt was so bad and I'm not even Catholic but in my faith along with most this is a major sin.  I dont your stat with you boyfriend but it wont get better until he marries you .  I bet you had parents who made you feel like everything you did you go to hell for.  I will end it saying this even though it will only help if you can truly belive it yourself "God is mericiful,and his mercy out weights his wrath",also I bet you boyfreind thinks your parents brainwashed the hell into you to make you feel this way and he probably hates your religion because of that..Good Luck I hope you can have a wholesome satisfing relationship soon and feel good about your relationship with god.
111116
You are not a homosexual. You are a person who has homosexual tendencies. I am not being picky here. There is much more to being human than any one aspect of ourselves. You ARE a Catholic who has same-sex attractions and your Church is NOT AGAINST YOU.\n\nLike every other human being, you have been blessed with existence—not because you deserve it, but because God in His generosity has given it to you. It is such a basic gift, that most of us ordinarily don’t even think of it as such. But it is. If God wanted to take it back, He would not have to do anything. He would have to STOP doing something. It’s a gift that He keeps giving or we would simply cease to exist. There is no way that we could ever pay Him for this.\n\nSo from the start, we owe Him big time. Now besides this we all have many other gifts as well. Some of us can paint portraits or play the piano. None of us has every gift. Some of the greatest gifts He gives us are the individual crosses that He places in our lives that offer us the opportunity to grow in our love for Him. \n\nSome people carry the cross of not being able to hear or see, while others, the cross of not being able to marry for any number of reasons. One could rant and complain that such is not fair. If God has chosen to create us, then He owes us the basics. At least He owes us a healthy body and psyche! But as we have seen, He doesn’t owe us anything. We owe Him. Further, He has shown us that He really cares about us and loves us with a love that is infinite—it has no limit. This is difficult for us to get our minds around since everything we experience has limits. But on that first Good Friday as He hung on the cross, He gave us a glimpse of what unlimited love is. It is there that we can come to an understanding of the value of our own crosses. They give us the opportunity to respond to such love in a concrete way that is as totally unique as the individual crosses He has given us.\n\nYou have a very special place in the Church. You have been called to have no other partner in life than Him. The world does not understand this. It speaks as if Good Friday never happened. But by the gift of faith that you do have, you know that almighty God chose to favor you with the gift of Himself in a very intimate and unique way. Selfless love is not easy for us, but He is so worth it!\n\nI would suggest that you check out this website: http://couragerc.net/\n\nCheck this website out as well--should this cross of yours be only for a temporary period of time: http://www.narth.com/docs/repair.html\n\nYou are in my prayers.
51337
OK lets try and unravel this into its core components.\n\nA police officer [I am assuming] has told you that you cannot approach and/or speak to this person.\n\nYou however, feeling guilty over whatever it is that you have done, feel an overwhelming desire to be punished for your transgression.\n\nThis is a normal reaction for many people as they feel the psychological need for punishment as this provides a sense of "closure" and a shift in guilt.\n\nIn your case you actually want him to do something wrong as well, not just punish you, as this means that he cannot point the finger at you because he has done a horrible thing too.\n\nI know people will say..go to your brother first before coming to the temple...but that does not apply to you in this situation.  You harbour no ill will towards this person!  You cry out to God because your sin is before you.  \n\nGod always hears this cry and you need to focus on your relationship with God first.  This is the path to forgiveness for you, not the friend.  You need to understand that God forgives you.  Then, you may be able to forgive yourself.  Finally you may be able to approach this person and ask forgiveness.\n\nRemember, they may not want to forgive you, and that is their right.  Your peace and forgiveness with God is not dependant upon this persons responses to you, even though you did the wrong thing.\n\nGod may be workingnin that persons life too, and Gods timing is not always ours.  Also, some people just need lots of time to be able to forgive, and just because you may be in a hurry to receive it, does not mean you should hurry them up.\n\nThats why it starts with God for you, so that if this man cannot forgive you, you have peace with God that you did all you could to ask for it....and who knows, in time that might help this man to forgive you anyway.\n\nForgiveness is something you ask for from another because it gives THEM the opportunity to heal from the hurt you have done to them.....\n\nIt is never asked for to make YOU feel better about the pain and guilt that you feel for having caused it.\n\nIn your case, you cant approach this person anyway, so this is a perfect opportunity to seek a counsellor perhaps to give you some support with your feelings and how to deal with them.
637771
I'm sorry that you had so much trouble and pain in your life.  I am Catholic also.  I was away from the church for a long time because I just kinda wanted to do my own thing.  It was about 4-5 years ago that I started feeling something missing in my life.  I couldn't figure it out.  Initially I started looking for a sense of meaning in my life.  Tried a couple churches, even a Methodist church.  Nothing felt quite right until I found the church I attend now.  It's a Catholic church.  It is truly amazing when I look back now on things that happened in my life and to people I love.  I looked at things very much like you.  My son went to jail, I was in financial hell, didn't have the greatest relationship with my wife which caused us to separate for a year.  Looks pretty gloomy huh?  Where was God during all this?  Well, my son was running with some pretty bad people.  He was put in jail where he had time to reflect on where his life was going and he now attends mass with me and my wife who are now together with a relationship stronger than ever because we needed time apart to see how much we needed each other.  As for the finances, we still live week to week, but when I look back, there is always enough there.  There is always a sum of money that comes from somewhere right before we really need it.  Sometimes God doesn't give us what we want.  Sometimes that's a good thing because we rarely know what we want and our mind is always changing.  Mostly God gives us what we need.  Because he knows us.  I doubt what I said will change your mind about God right now.  But please keep in mind what I said.  Please give Him time to work in your life.  I don't know what you have been through, but maybe some of the things were for the better.  For your better.  Maybe they weren't what you wanted.  Maybe they were what you needed.  God is always there waiting for you to turn around and talk to him.  Start small and tell Him how you feel.  Even if it's anger.  Tell Him that you hurt and need healing.  I know it's cliche' but even if you don't believe in him, he believes in you and he loves you very much even if you don't feel it.  Faith isn't a feeling.  Faith is what keeps us praying when we have no feeling to grasp.  If everyone had that feeling of God's love and presence, there would be no need for faith.  Hang in there my friend.  God Bless you.
626288
Your feelings are natural - hurt and betrayed.   \n\nPLAYBOY INTERVIEW: In an interview published in the November 1976 issue of Playboy magazine, then-Governor (Jimmy) Carter talked about the role of religion in his life. In one part he said: \n\n" I try not to commit a deliberate sin. I recognize that I'm going to do it anyhow, because I'm human and I'm tempted. And Christ set some almost impossible standards for us. Christ said, 'I tell you that anyone who looks on a woman with lust has in his heart already committed adultery.'\n"I've looked on a lot of women with lust. I've committed adultery in my heart many times. This is something that God recognizes I will do--and I have done it--and God forgives me for it." \n\nSo, you have three choices: dwell on the past, worry about the future, or live in "here and now" with a completely devoted, loving, adoring husband, who reached out and confessed a deep, dark secret.  I wonder how he has struggled with this all these years. \n\nTo answer your question.  You get through it by going through it - not going around the issue.  Talk to eachother and listen to eachother.   Find out "why?" - not why he did it - but why is he telling you now after all these years.   Feeling Guilty?  Has Cancer?  Being Blackmailed?  Join a new church?  Went to an AA meeting?  If you love other, you should both be greatful that you are still together, build on that love, and help and support eachother during this short time on earth.  It will be over before you know it.
161747
I really understand how you're feeling because I have been in similar situations.\nDon't ever let anyone push you into something. The Holy Spirit is not pushy and will not use pressure to get you to do something you're uncomfortable with.\nDo whatever feels right to you, not what people are expecting you to do.\nJust listen to your own heart and let the Holy Spirit guide you, not other people's behavior.\n\nIf you want God to give you the kind of joy, that you see others experiencing, you can ask Him for it. \nDoesn't mean your gonna be laughing or dancing. We're all different and act differently even in church. I'm not the jumping-around type myself and I never will be. I have experienced moments of indescribable joy though.\nGod's joy is available to you and if you want it, all you have to do is ask.
169411
Have you talked to him about reconciliation through some type of therapy through your church. I have been divorced, and would have preferred reconciliation, but never even talked about it to my ex-wife. She pursued the divorce at first, and I never fought at all, what a mistake. He might have lost that loving feeling, but that is part of life. It will return, given time. and it will be better than before.
472677
If it's been a week you should probably go to the doctor. It's something you shouldn't let go. You actually should go to the emergency room; if it is infection it could be really bad by the time you can see the doc on Monday. Better safe than sorry because it could make you very sick.  You're paying the price right now by beating yourself up over it.  Take a big deep breath, forgive yourself and don't worry about what others could be thinking about you.  And I'm going out on the Jesus limb right now but He will forgive you, you can forgive yourself and you'll get on with your life and do good things.  I'm not saying you will forget about it and never think about it again but you can get out there and do some positive things with your life and it will be better.  Time and forgiveness is a good healer.  I'll pray for you tonight but you do need to get to the doctor to be sure you don't have an infection!!!!!!
651010
these feelings are normal.  everyone questions life at some point.  hang in there.  see if you can talk to someone like your priest or a counsellor... it's good just to open up and let your feelings out.
124835
ive been through hell in my life too, i was beat and raped and even stabbed, and made to go w/out food, and w/out seeing my family. its not easy to forgive someone sometimes, but for your own sake you have too. all your doing is harboring all those negative feelings. do you want to be a victim all your life? of course you dont. so you need to decide right now that your not gonna be the victim anymore, you are the overcomer,ok? you can do it. you have a wonderful spouse right now and kids. you have so much to be thankful for. why would you want to let your past ruin your future? that doesnt make any sence at all. you dont have to talk to your ex, but just say outloud "i forgive, then say his name" "and im letting it go and giving it all to god, it no longer has any control over my life". and mean it when you say it. say it as much as you need to. remember this, if you live your life like this then you let your ex  win, he's won. he's still controlling you even though your not together. let it go, and let god!!! I did. and im gonna be remarrying this summer to the love of my life and i would never let my past put a damper on my happiness. i dont care about the past anymore, it just doesnt matter.
2475
Going to confession is one of the very important duties of the Catholic. It's one of the essential elements so to speak of being a good Catholic. I know it seems awkward and it isn't much fun, but isn't always kind of a release too, to be able to confess all the wrongs you have committed? Best of luck to you.