I told my guy that I didnt want a relationship and now I am starting to fall for him. I am trying to find the best way to tell him im interested in him without scaring him away. I feel he has been holding back emotions only because I told him I didnt want a relationship. \n\n\nHELP!
214975
truth is the answer.Honesty is always the best policy. we are people and some times we have to go thru a learning process and by it we learn what it is we really want and along the way to that discovery we may not understand, so sometimes we may have to give a explanation but let it be real.
529425
to be perfectly honest no i dont think he wants a serious relationship but really the only way to find is to basically tell him how you feel hope i have helped you with this and also i hope you can help me out check my question on my profile anybody's help would be greatly helpful
226731
you shouldn't tell him unless you're positive that he has feelings for you too. it'll totally weird him out if you confess you're into him and he's not into you. plus you run the risk of getting your feelings hurt. better to play it safe for now.
48006
Ok blue, i know how u feel, so talk to him about your feelings. A guy friend of mine liked me but i didnt cause i just like him as a friend, just like what ur going through. It sucks i know, but i went up to him and asked him if we can talk and so i told him i dont have the same feelings for you. Plus ask him if he is willing to put your guy's friendship on the line if u guys go out, you know what i mean? You guys are probably good friends, right? I know u dont want to loose that,so let him no that. Speak ur mind and he should respect that no matter what.
445860
believe me, i've been in your shoes, and guess what? i told him that i liked him, unfortunately he didnt like me back, but at least he knew how i felt/feel about him.\n\ndont be shy\njust go for it
641112
It's obvious that you need to tell him that you're not compatible. Honesty would be the best way to let someone know you're not feeling them. You shouldn't necessarily go into the drug-use and the ignorance unless he leaves you no choice. If he pulls a dumb-one and tries to act as if you're doing something wrong by telling him that you're not interested in him anymore, then let him know what exactly you're trying to say. He should get it then. Good luck with this.
349900
We all know that breaking it off with someone is never easy. It sucks, to be more precise, and even less fun than getting rejected is actually having to do the rejecting. Okay, maybe doing the rejecting is a little better. Anyway, if you're thinking about blowing a guy off, here are some ideas on how to give him the brush off that won't break his heart too badly -- or destroy his ego.\n\nYou're not interested. He calls and leaves a message. What should you do? Do not return that call. \n\nAnd what if you picked up the phone? What then?  Then, lie. Please lie. Tell him that you just got back together with your friends. This is our very first choice for rejection. Second best is you realized that you are going through a period where you do not want to date at all and just want to focus on yourself. Sure, these excuses might be transparent -- but men feel better to live a lie than face the truth of rejection.\n\nAnother possibility, though not quite as good due to possible ambiguity is the good ol' distancing technique. You tell him you are really busy for the next couple of weeks and will call him when things get less crazy -- a bit confusing for most men, but definitely effective and not too painful.\n\nYou really gave it a chance, but it's not happening. What should you do?   Again, lie. Your friends are still your best bet. Do not tell him you met someone else recently. That smarts. Choosing someone you just met tells him he lost a contest. No one likes to lose. \n\nAnother option: Honesty, within reason. If it's simply a matter of chemistry - or lack thereof - tell him. Most guys can survive that after just a few dates.\n\nAs much as it's going to hurt, tell him the truth. At this point, honest communication is the right thing to do. Don't be too specific if it's for reasons no human should ever hear: you smell, you are not good-looking enough, you are boring, you're an idiot -- please refrain from using these. Be gentle, but do not be too vague. Just give it to him straight and say that you're really sorry. And do not try to be friends right away. \n\nIt is really tough to swallow "can we just be friends?" If you two are suitable as friends then let that relationship take it's proper course, and do not initiate it while you're dumping him as a boyfriend.\n\nObviously, this all can vary depending on your circumstances. \n\nJust remember: Be gentle, lying can be good, and specificity, well, it can sometimes be too specific. And did I mention lying? \nGood Luck>r
9588
Be very straight forward with them from the beginning.  Tell them that you want a relationship with no strings attatched.  Maybe someday you will want a relationship but not right now.
122025
Don't say you're an idiot...I don't know you but I'm sure you are a nice girl...no one really is an expert or born knowing how to deal with relationship matters...for what is worth it sounds like you wish to have a REAL relationship...you mentioned that you guys had agreed on not having a relationship but see now you have feelings for him...and the longer you wait the more damaging you are doing to yourself(if he's not interested). Tell him how you feel about the situation.if he runs away then YOU'LL KNOW that he is not the right one..BUT DONT FOOL YOURSELF and hide your feelings...BEST OF LUCK TO YOU.
129207
Straight forward is the best way.  Just tell him you've felt really close to him lately and you were wondering if he thinks that you two might be headed toward giving this whole relationship thing another try.
268483
Tell us your gay. That one is painless. \n\nAlso, most women can take the "I'm just not into you". \n\nI would rather know that a guy just isn't into me than for him to give me a whole bunch of crap like "It's not you it's me"\n\nNOW if you want to through in diamonds and things (axe the fur......fur is wrong) then go right ahead. Nothing says closure like a pricey shinny thing. :)
358066
I think he told you didn't he, from what I surmise from your text is there is lots of signals in your mind that say he is in to you, which may not be the case. don't use your friend to do the work that really scares you, you bring a 3rd party in to negotiate a relationship, you are asking for trouble, it's OK to use one to break the ice so to speak, like hey my friend likes you kinda thing. but for him to tell his feelings to your friend, not a good idea.
203970
Tell him that you're not ready to say it and put that sort of label on your feelings. But that you feel for him. That you care about him. When my man first told me, I din't say it back. I told him That I feel for him. It made me really nervous. I told him never to say it unless he means it, because I would never say anything empty.
255917
This guy is playing with your feelings. He's just keeping you on the line so that he's always got a soft place to fall. Make like a tree and leave. Two years is a long time to invest your feelings in someone who doesn't want a relationship. Tell him you don't have time to waste on waiting for him to make up his mind. I think he's already made up his mind and likes the way things are. You don't know how many other gals he's playing this sorry tune with either. He's got what he wants. I would suggest that you stop giving him what he wants and tell him you're not playing anymore. <*)))><
69158
If after a year of wandering blindly through purgatory and your not sure of the status of this relationship then the answer is NO. Your not his girlfriend and he certainly isn't your boyfriend. \n\nMen say what they mean, but in your case it's what he hasn't said.  Has he asked you to be his girlfriend or in a committed relationship? How does he introduced you to his friends and family? Does he even take you around them?\n\nWhy are you waiting for him to make his intentions clear? Ask him. Are you afraid he won't want to hang out with you anymore? Don't you want to be more than just a fuck buddy.? Isn't that why your asking this question? I think you know the answer to your own question and I think that you are so desperate to have the attention of a man that you are willing to settle for this form of dating purgatory and don't want to admit to yourself that your not his girlfriend and that he doesn't want that type of relationship with YOU, because if he did he would have made it clear to you.\n\nDump this loser and move on. You deserve to be with someone who will truly love you and who will tell you every day and every one he knows that he loves you. \n\nGet out of purgatory and find an angel that will fly you to heaven.
413453
you should be honest with him because you would want to know if you were in his position,and if you tell him and he freaks out and don't want to date you anymore than it wasn't meant to be anyway. plus, he's probably going to find out soon or later and it's best if it's from you. good luck
648541
If you find out how to get past the "friend barrier", let me know.  I hear a lot of women say they want to be friends with a guy & then date him, but I also know several girls who say I'm a great friend & have no romantic interest in me whatsoever.  Usually, I try the honest approach & tell a girl I'm interested in more from here, but have only had limited success at best with that idea.  Still, at least if you're honest & tell her your feelings, you won't be wondering years from now what would have happened if you had the guts to tell her.  Best of luck, & I hope everything works out for the best.