My boys dog is an ugly flea bitten mongrol.\nI wanna get rid of him, I am a real do-it-yourself kind of guy and thought it be a fun project for me and my boy to do.\nIf I was just me involved I would put the mutts head under my truck tire and be done with it. \nThen I figured, what a perfect opportunity to bond with my son. He could be my big assistant, give him something to tell the kids at kindergarten when he goes back on monday.\nAny suggestions. \nSo far, I been thinking, fireworks, gas, staple gun etc. Or maybe fireworks and gas. I dunno, can anyone give me some ideas, this dog is making me mental.
207535
I agree with the people above. You should set the right example for your and other kids. And recycle. Find a nice kebab recipe, take your family to the park for a lovely sunday BBQ, and turn the remains into a decorative shade lamp.\nEnjoy!\nRegards from Holland.
460833
he should love you unconditionally..that includes your dogs. Don't get rid of them. You will be miserable and you will resent him for making you do it. Tell him to give it some time and the dogs will adjust to him and he to them. and btw...Texas is a great place to live with very open, friendly people.
515199
Eve Honey, give this Bum the door and fast. Tell him his ticket just came in and it's a one way. You don't need this treatment for him, if he wants to give orders to someone get him a dog.\n\n   You are a person, you will do what you want, when you want, you don't have to answer to him, not like the way you have been.
64737
I've seen quite a few funny things in my time, but what first came to mind when I read your question was an incident involving my new husband Graham who was not really into dogs, and Sam my dog who I had had for over eight years.\n\nWe had taken Sam for a run around the park and were on our way back to the car when I saw an ice cream van arrive on the road at the bottom of the park. With it being quite a warm day, we decided to treat ourselves to one.  When we got down to the van I decided to have a "lolly" whilst Graham chose a "99" which is a wafer cornet with a scoop of ice cream in it and a chocolate "log" inside that.\n\nKnowing Sam's liking for ice cream I said to Graham:\n"Shall we get one for Sam too?"\n"Certainly not," said he whilst paying the vendor,....."you don't buy ice cream for dogs!"\n\nWhereupon he promptly dropped his change on the floor and in bending down to pick it up presented his ice cream cornet right in front of Sam's face.....\n\nNow come on...if you were in Sam's place what would you have done?\n\nYep, you got it.....Sam helped himself to a big lick of the ice cream and a chunk of the chocolate log...... \n\nGraham's face was an absolute picture, and I doubled up laughing as did a few other people who had heard what Graham had said and seen what happened.\n\nOf course Graham had to get himself another one whilst Sam ended up eating the rest of the first one minus the chocolate, which went in the bin cuz we know dogs aren't supposed to eat it. \n\nSam 1 - Graham 0\n\nThat's what you call poetic justice. It was really funny and Graham never refused to buy Sam an ice cream again.....
499500
i have the same problem with my boxer/pitt mix-(named Isis)--oh my god i thought i was alone--and u can't talk 2 people about it cause they look @ u like you're friggin' crazy---no matter what i feed her the dog farts like a darn human---and DO MEAN loud!!!!  and she can clear a room out in a heartbeat honey-----just keep some air spray near--
660209
I was cleaning my dogs kennel this morning and my dog decided to pee on my leg.   It wasn't funny then and I'm not sure if it is funny now.  \nAnyone want to buy a couple of Huskeys.
147136
No worries.  Just remember that,as with all animals, there are many different kinds.  You get gentle cats and angry cats.  You get friendly dogs and vicious dogs.  Just keep the faith and everything would be alright. (BIG SMILE)
595333
Thank you for this laugh, I really needed that after the day I have had.  My 17 year old daughter said that if mongeese or ferrets or any other kind of animals are unleashed in her school, she will know who wrote this question  LOL  We come from the mountains of Tennessee, but live in Kansas, and she is afraid the school will make her round up all the critters..LOL  I am laughing so hard I am in tears....LOL  So, thank you again, and as a mother I really have to say, shame on you for thinking of such a thing, but I couldn't say that to your face without busting out laughing  LOL
303495
LOL puppy LUV.. you poor lil gurl... send him a love letter... wit a question and ask him to circle yes or no..
591984
my homie, Satan! he my runnin dog.  what you want with him?  he is kinda bad with the whole legal, politics gig...but he can take their souls if you want.  just give me they names, and ill just jet on over to my homies crib, and let him know.  see if hes got time.  he real good at soul stealing.  \n\njust playin.  sorry dude, but Satan ain't real.  trying to call him would be like writing a letter to Santa or praying to god.  you might as well talk to a brick.
59781
I applaud you for being so eager to work. Most kids just want money for free. If you love dogs, dont mind walking a couple of miles(or have a local dog park)and dont mind cleaning up after dogs then its great for you. i would only start off with a couple (like two)dogs first then work your way up to more. That way you dont get yourself overloaded. Dogs can be crazy in packs. only add one dog at a time to your walking lineup because they have to settle into an order nad if you try to add to many you may have a fight on your hands. As far as prices go check around with vets in your area and bording kennels for info on a normal price range. its different in every area and should be based on the dogs as well as the distance/time. Good Luck!
406138
I seriously don't think the dog realizes what he did. They don't think the way people do. Forgive him and give him a hug, it will make you feel better.
604447
Hey Katie, I think that she is referring to a friend of her boyfriend\nand refers to him as a lopdog. I mean, would any person really\nnot be able to walk around the house naked because of a dog?\n\nHere's the deal, the lapdog needs to find himself another place to\ncrash! That doesn't mean that B/F and Lapdog Pete can't still\nbe friends, just means Lapdog Pete is not a part of your family.
418369
I think what you've said here is a wonderful thing. "This" is what I've done for 25 years now. I'm retired Animal Control officer, but I used to dress up as a clown, bring in puppies to Children's Hospital, and spend time with those children, some of which have been abandoned by their parents, for whatever reason. I still do this, but I don't work for animal control. I also go to Nursing homes, and birthday partys for parents who can't afford the money to "hire" a clown. It's really great, and sometimes I think "I" have more fun than the kids! Yippeeee!
567423
NOW THAT IS FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i would be a little disgusted though, but hey, that is hilarious!!!!!!! and i got one for you to do on him: if he asks you for a glass of water, put some dish soap in the cup, then put water in it, pop the ALL of the bubbles, and let him drink up!!!!!!!!! if he leaves food sitting out, and he is still going to eat it when he comes back, put a few things in there, like soap, lime juice, chili, go crazy, but don't put anything that is poisonous in there!!!!!!!! oh yeah, and try not to crack up when he comes back and starts to eat his food, wait until he tastes the stuff, and makes a funny face. \n\ni got another one: get ketchup, baking soda and put some in the bottle. then close the lid, shake it up, and make him something to go w/ the ketchup, like fries, or something. then give him the ketchup, and let him open it, and BAM!!!!!!!!!!! a face full of ketchup. have fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!\n\naren't i evil?
69968
If this dude is even remotely entertaining opinions from his mother, run the f away.\n\n...don't know how old y'all are (apparently old enough to have bred at one time or another), but if you're at that point, let momma have 'im.
575810
Sorry hon, time to get yourself another boy, and forget him.\nIf you lose a pet, as sad as that can be, you get another pet.\nWith a new boyfriend, you will soon have the old one, out of your mind.