Review: `Definitely' crackles then drags
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Surely it's not too early to feel nostalgic for 1992. After all, it was 16 whole years ago. No iPods yet Â and those clunky cell phones! Kurt Cobain was still alive and Bill Clinton hadn't even met Monica Lewinsky, much less have sexual relations with that woman.
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Periodic bursts of cleverness and eye-popping imagery canÂt disguise that this is just another movie full of jive-talking computer-generated animals with little new to say.
534335
Morning Raga drags on with painful predictability.
747049
Close to three hours long, this Johnny Depp film is an exhausting watch.
431268
Rathnaja fails to recreate the magic of Nenapirali in his second directorial venture. Prem looks cute in songs and has worked hard for his role. Hamsalekha delivers good songs, but the film drags forever.
571039
Robert Zemeckis' new film has technical wizardry but lacks heart.
695427
The fact that this  latest installment in the "Behind the Camera" franchise is  airing on Labor Day evening is perfectly appropriate given the  laborious task of making one's way through a rather clunky  flick that supplies further evidence as to why the  made-for-TV-movie genre remains on life support.
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Tycho:  The news that Mass Effect would feature an uncompromising, high-res simulation of alien lesbian sex was sweet, and hot, like spun sugar.  For Gabriel, at any rate.  Some of the community reaction is dedicated to demanding gay parity for the male persuasion of this sexual equation, lengthy treatises by oiled men who crave starborne sodomy.  The rest of the dialogue is just boring.  Boring, terrestrial, and (quite frankly) myopic.         Where are the bipedal crustaceans in this calculation?  The swirling, aroused gasses?  The lonely, sentient space station whose hermetic bulkheads hold secret clusters of erotic delights, provided your character has both the skills and equipment?  Carpe astrum, you Goddamned backwater clowns.  There must be an entire universe of thrilling, dangerous, sometimes razor sharp genitalia that slavers beyond the Horsehead Nebula.      You might have noticed that we're advertising an Everquest game, an act that I'm aware places us in significant rhetorical peril.  If I had not found the game completely electrifying, I would have turned down the buy.  Of course, what I find electrifying has somewhat strange parameters.    I used to enjoy a deeply indie online CCG called Star Chamber, which was eventually purchased by an online CCG company called Worlds Apart (which did, among other things, the Lord of the Rings online CCG).  As does happen from time to time, World Apart was eventually purchased by Sony Online Entertainment, becoming SOE Denver.  Since then, they also delivered a Stargate CCG that we liked enough to advertise.  Legends of Norrath: Oathbound is a game within a game, similar to Final Fantasy's Triple Triad, that you can play against other players directly in the client.  It's tied into the loot systems for both EQ games, so that cards you get in packs are actually equipment and so forth - I find that interesting, but as a person with no investment in those systems it doesn't motivate me.  What motivates me is a rock solid, deeply tactical card game, which Oathbound absolutely is.  It plays in a stand-alone client which you can download, and comes with a fairly elaborate tutorial that is worth playing all the way through.  I had no interest in it, I felt confident dismissing it out of hand, and it won me over.  You may find yourself similarly surprised.    I have a very high opinion of Eurogamer, but I don't know how a person could possibly have reviewed Team Fortress 2 already.  We put time in both at work and at night, and I don't feel like I'm any smarter about the sometimes extraordinary interplay between the game's nine Goddamned classes, which mesh in real time to create some kind of shuddering Chaos Engine.  I have a lot of fun playing it, though the Medic brings me the most joy, so I've focused on it almost to the exclusion of all others.  A healing "gun" - like the repair module present in Tribes, almost a decade ago - is an immensely satisfying way to model that relationship.  Anytime your medical gun is attached to a player, your "Overcharge" ability is building up.  When unleashed, both you and your target become invulnerable to enemy attacks.  It's an incredible siege breaking technique, and it's earned simply by embodying the virtues of your class.  But where to use it, when to use it, I'm still learning this - and what's more, other players are still learning that I can do it.  I always love the early period in these multiplayer offerings, before the hard limits are known, when players seem to be magicians and anything is possible.
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If ever a movie had a case of the blues and the blahs, itâs âSpider-Man 3,â a sequel that is fizzled rather than fizzy.
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What does it take? A fireside chat from Nelson Mandela doesnt work. The pleas of pop icons like Bono fall on deaf ears.
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Tycho:  Despite what the Mr. Period comics might imply, I think of grammar as somewhat tyrannical, and believe that an obsession with the mechanical perfection of language is at odds with actual communication.  At the same time, I know (generally) how things should be arranged, and so non-standard uses deliver naughty thrills.  There are floating syllables in the recent Twisp & Catsby thing that can only be resolved by a very specific reading, and they project from the phrases in a suggestive way.  I even like trade names:  words that evoke fierce, yet sensitive gladiators or spry androids.
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Kavitha Lankesh's latest film doesn't live up to expectations.
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The stage adaptation of Reginald Rose's drama from the 1950's definitely creaks with age. But somehow the creaks begin to sound like soothing music.
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Calling this one a statement game doesn't do it justice.
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Thereâs a lot going on under the surface of âFeel the Noise,â far more than its indefensibly generic title suggests.
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A little less conversation and a little more action
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Though the album has its moments, it's not entirely enticing.