Instruct: Classify Amazon reviews into positive or negative sentiment
Query: If only it fed my kids

Adoption is out of the question, but I had to find a way that I could raise my kids without having to look at them, talk to them, or deal with them. Thank goodness for television with built in DVD. I can have somebody else send them to their rooms and have the kids watch the same movies over and over again for mind-numbing, out-of-my-hair enjoyment.Teachers in schools aren't what they used to be; they don't parent kids enough. They don't spend enough quality time teaching kids morals and that kind of nonsense. So where teachers leave off, the DVD/Television can resume. And with my latest welfare check, this unit is priced very reasonably.Thanks to new technology, it won't matter that I've forgotten 3 of my 5 kids' names! Thanks, Toshiba!